The moon shined down on Canterlot as rows of ponies made their way to the castle, chatting about what they’ll do to whoever would listen. Most of them were residents of the capitol, but anypony that could make it were there. This was the first time all four princesses would be present, so naturally the event would draw attention by sheer celebrity power.
Nearly everypony was dressed for the occasion, and those that weren't at least had jewellery and other accessories to impress. It was almost blinding to him as he stumbled his way through the crowd.
“Hey, watch it!” one pony said when he bumped into her.
“Sorry.”
The young mare locked eyes with him and gave an inquisitive look. Somepony going bare? “Out of town?”
“Yes.” Back on pace, he walked with the other ponies, breaking eye contact.
Unfortunately for him, the mare wouldn’t let up. Smiling, she walked beside him and tried to matched his clumsy pace. “Where are you from?”
“Don’t know.”
“Oh...kay?” Didn’t know he hated her already. Shouldn’t it be the other way around? He bumped into her, after all. “Name’s Sterling. You?”
“Don’t know.”
She dropped her smile and glared at him. From the moment he bumped into her, she had an inkling that the stallion wasn’t here for pleasantries. She never expected him to be so stubborn, though.
“All the princesses will be there?”
She sighed. Finally, they were making conversation! “Yeah. They’ll all be there to talk and grace us mortals.” She laughed at her own joke. “But I’m guessing most of us are just here to pay our respects to Princess Twilight. She’s the one who suggested the Triple G be free to attend, after all.”
The strange pony never turned around, only his flopping ears signalling his attentiveness.
“Are you with anypony?” Sterling continued. “Family? Friends? A date?”
“No. You?”
“Nah, my parents are just too busy with work overseas, so I’m celebrating my 18th birthday this week with this.”
The stallion turned around to face his companion. “A unicorn.”
“What, you’re first time seeing one?” Sterling smiled and nudged his side. “Pe-ga-sus.” She pointed at a random pony in the crowd. “Earth pony.”
“Not mudpony?”
Her mouth fell open and whipped her head around. When nopony looked like they heard, she turned to him. “What are you thinking, blurting that out like that?!” she whispered furiously.
“I heard a unicorn say that when I entered the city. Something wrong?”
“Are you a foal?” She stomped at the pavement. “You can’t just say that with ponies around!”
“So you are saying saying it is allowed in private?”
“Wha-no!” Sterling gesticulated with her hooves. Considering that she was keeping up with him in tandem, it was quite a sight. “It’s just...something you don’t say whenever you can!”
“Ah. A slur, then.”
“If you knew, why did you-oh, forget it.”
“Does that mean there are times when it is appropriate to say it?”
“Never mind.” She decided to let the matter drop and was left with a strong desire to smack the stallion. She would have ditched him if it weren’t for the tight squeeze on the way to the entrance, so she opted for ignoring him from now on.
The castle was a magnificent sight. Light flooded out of every window as ponies passed through the door without pause. From there, it was only the matter of finding the princesses for the stallion.
“Easier said than done.”
The stallion sank into the crowd, blending in with his neutral coat, and scanned the lobby. Even with the castle’s enchantments, it was a little too cramped for comfort and he was getting edgy.
Travelling room to room, his pace quickened with every failure. The princesses would naturally be surrounded, especially Princess Sparkle, but which one of them would be the least preoccupied?
“Luna.”
He slowed down, calming himself as he reformulated his plan.
Where there were not rows of ponies from outside, there were clusters of them around the tables of food. Talking, eating, drinking, laughing. His skin prickled anxiously as he breathed in rhythm. Did the castle just get bigger?
“So close, so close, so close, so close, so close. Where are they, where are they, where are they?”
He was so busy keeping from eye contact that he didn’t look where he was going. Eventually he decided to take refuge in one of the bathrooms.
“EEEEEK! Get out!”
Alas, fortune was a bitch.
He muttered a quick apology before being punted out with a magic bolt. He whipped his head back and forth, checking if any of the guards saw his little escapade. Either they didn’t notice or somepony replaced them with ponyquins. How they were guarding the place with their eyeballs frozen in place, the stallion didn’t know.
“Good.”
However, blending back in was not easy. The nearby elite caught wind and laughed, one even pointing at him. Whoever these ponies were, they were a tighter group and that much harder to avoid.
“Look at him, bumbling into the mare’s room.”
“Is he even dressed for the occasion? Has he been under a rock until now?”
Before he could escape, an enormous earth pony wearing a gold vest leered down in front of him. Nevertheless, the stallion didn’t look at him, only directly at that “C” embroidered to his chest.“Hey, flyboy, why don’t you go home and get some clothes on? It’s going to get cold after the Gala’s done.”
“Thank you for the advice, but I have none.” He tried to move past him, but another pony in a similar vest blocked him.
“You hear that?” the hefty pony called out to his friends, who laughed with him. “Let’s get this guy to a proper bathroom and get him nice and warm.”
“Hey, look!” Another earth pony in a similar vest grabbed the stallion’s tail and pointed at his rump. “What’s a old bum like you doing without a cutie mark?”
“Trying to find one of the princesses.”
“Ooooh, smart plan,” the hefty pony said. “Maybe you can get them to give you one? Come on, old colt. I’ll take you to them.”
The group surrounded him but he was too quick. He jumped straight up and spread his wings, groaning when he heard several ponies gasping and screaming at him.
He glided landed far away from the jocks, who was shoving aside party-goers to get to their target. They were effectively impeded, but out of his peripheral, he saw an armored white stallion marching towards him, no doubt to lecture him about proper indoors etiquette.
“Damnation.” He turned around and forced his way through the tiniest gaps of the crowd. He heard the sound of cups and plates clattering as they fell from his shoving, but he did not pause to apologize.
Where are they? Hiding? In disguise? He heard of their gossip from other species. How one would banish you into the sun and the other would burst your eardrums if you beat her in chess. Why so many ponies would come to the Gala with them as the stars, he could only guess they did it to appease them out of fear.
“Sterling was not like that, though,” he mumbled as he turned around, sighing when he lost sight of the guard.
“Somepony called me?”
He knew who the voice belonged to, but he was too late. He turned his head to the voice reflexively and saw the unicorn, dressed in beige and make-up. “Oh. It’s you, mister…”
He turned away, but she grabbed his hooved to face him. She scowled at his neutral face and huffed. “You still didn’t give your name, you know.”
“Have your parents not taught you to talk to strangers?”
“Geez, you’re more old-fashioned than I thought,” she groaned.
“If that is your type, I do not have money.”
“Wha-wha-what? What do you think you’re...” She panicked and was glad nopony noticed them “I’m not that kind of mare!”
“You are of age yet young, accessorized, and engaged conversation as soon as I, an older pony, bumped into you. You must have thought it was a move.”
Sterling was about to shout at him but stopped at his gaze. It was no longer neutral, but cold and admonishing, even though his face was lax. The worst kind of reaction, one of silent disappointment.
“You…” After several seconds, she released the breath she’s been holding. She smiled meekly. “Is it that obvious?”
“I met a more experienced woma-mare before. Outside Canterlot. Do not try to pretend to be something you do not understand.”
Leaving her to contemplate, he sank into the crowd once more.
“Hey, wait!”
He was thankful for the nearby band playing. He walked through the trimmed grass-grass?
His long mane suddenly fluttered in front of his muzzle. He cursed the wind and checked his surroundings. As he feared, he was outside.
He did another perimeter check. Decorated trees, a string quartet, small tables carrying drinks, and, to his displeasure, two unicorn guards. One squinting at him, another whispering something to his colleague.
“Hey, you there,” one of them called out. “Wait just a-”
He was already on the move.
“Stop!”
The stallion walked like he’d never walked before. He no longer stumbled like a drunkard and kept his pacing firm, no longer bothering to avoid ponies and pushing them aside instead. He saw Sterling, still standing where he left her, brighten at his return.
“Hey, mister, about the-”
“Move please.”
“Unf! Hey, what was-” She was interrupted by the guards, who had an easier time moving through the mob, following behind him while he did the hard work.
“Stop! Or we’ll use force!” One of the guards primed his horn, but the stallion kept running. “I warned you!”
Suddenly, a white light covered him and he found himself immobilized. It was as if his body was coated with superglue. He couldn’t even move his mouth to scream as he was brought before the guards.
“Hey, that’s him, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, it is! Good thing we were stationed outside, huh?”
The taller one released his magic and before the stallion could get to his hooves, the shorter one formed a pair of hoofcuffs and a rope around his wings.
“What is going on here?”
Everypony’s heads turned to the majestic voice. It was Princess Celestia and beside her, Princess Twilight, who was just as shocked as everypony else.
“Guards, what’s the meaning of this?” Celestia asked sternly, not wavering from the sight of the struggling stallion.
The tall one bowed. “Princess Celestia, this is the wanted pony that’s been circulating around Equestria: Trotter.”
“Trotter?” Twilight asked, looking at her mentor, but she wouldn’t return her gaze. “Princess, who’s Trotter?”
Temporarily ignoring everypony, Celestia bent down and inspected the stallion. He matched the description: unkempt black mane, brown coat, lack of a cutie mark, pegasus. She nodded to the tall guard. “I see. But first, please undo his bindings.”
The guard’s jaw dropped. ‘But Princess Celestia! he’s a wanted pony, he’s-”
Celestia immediately shot him a harsh glare and he clammed up. “This is not the place for a scene,” she whispered to him. “Keep his wings wrapped, but take those cuffs off. We don’t want word spreading that a wanted pony’s here.”
“Yes, Princess.” The guards saluted and released the stallion.
The stallion got back to his hooves and looked at Celestia. “Finally, I meet you face-to-face.”
Celestia blinked in surprise. Even after capture and in the presence of one of the most powerful beings on planet, he did not miss a beat. He didn’t even look bothered by the attention he was getting from everypony.
“Who are you?” she asked him.
“I do not know. And for now, I do not care.”
He slowly approached her, the guards priming their horns again. “Not another step!”
When he didn’t stop, Celestia stepped forward. “Both of you, stop.” She and the stallion were almost touching when they stopped. “Please answer. If you don’t, I will have to escort you out of the building.”
“All I want is for you to fulfil a request of mine. I tried it myself, but I think I need someone of your caliber to do it for me now. That’s the whole reason why I came here.”
“Mister, please calm down,” Celestia said gently. Onlookers were muttering to each other. She needed to get him out of here. “Just come with us quietly and you can talk to me as much as you’d like.”
“That will not do justice. My patience has run dry. I need to show you what I mean.”
He pulled back his hoof and swung it to her face.
It would have connected if he wasn’t suddenly pushed back by a dark-blue alicorn’s magic. He was sent flying back, spinning wildly before crashing into a nearby marble pillar. He didn’t even let out a grunt.
“Luna!” Celestia shouted at her sister rushing towards her. “What in Equestria were you thinking?” she asked harshly. She tried to keep herself to a whisper. Ponies everywhere screamed in terror and scrambled to get out of the castle.
“He was going to attack you!” Luna said. She gestured the guards to tend to the fallen stallion. “Why would you expose yourself to him like that? He was looking for you!”
“I was leading him away so nopony could get hurt!” Celestia groaned and faced Twilight, who was dumbstruck. “Help Cadence and the Elements lead everypony out of here safely. Luna and I’ll take it from here.”
“Alright, Princess!” Twilight chirped and sprinted out to find them. “Everypony! Stay calm and head for the exits. We have the situation under control!”
Celestia couldn’t stop herself from smiling as she watched her pupil lead everypony out of the room. However, her smile faltered when she heard the cracking of marble. She turned around at where the stallion crashed but it was too late.
Not just the pillar, but the ceiling it supported came crumbling down. In panic, the two guards ran out of the way. Luna rushed towards him but couldn’t make it in time. In just a few seconds, there was nothing but a pile of rock and ground marble all over the floor.
“No!”
The two princesses jumped and stared at Sterling, who galloped towards the ruin but was stopped by the guards.
“Miss, it’s not safe here! You need to leave!”
“Get him out of there!” she screamed, mascara running down her muzzle. “You can still save him, can’t you?!”
The words clicked in her mind and Celestia ran to the mess. She channeled all the strength she could removing the broken pillar.
“My little pony! Please be alive! Answer me!”
“Is he alright, sister?” Luna asked, running next to her.sister, trying to stop her own tears. She blew away all the dust and powder and gasped. “Sister, is he...”
“Stop shouting, please. And I am no one’s little pony.”
Everypony stopped breathing as the stallion picked himself up, unscathed. He still had that neutral face and looked around the scene. “Damnation. Even that did not do it.”
His look of apathy was quickly challenged by shock when the princesses and Sterling surrounded him.
“My stars! How are you alive after that?”
“My little-I mean, mister, are you alright?”
“You scared the crap out of us!”
The stallion sighed, signalling the mares to stop talking with their muzzles so close to his. “I am sorry, but there is only one of me. Anyways-” he faced Celestia “-I want to tell you my request, and I will not be denied.”
Celestia was stunned. He’s still on about that? “Of course, but first, we should get you to an infirmary, in case-”
“No. I am uninjured and I will cooperate with your guards after you have heard me.”
The princesses stared at each other, silently asking for the other’s suggestion. The Gala had been cancelled, the place was a mess, and they could use a shower right now. Then again, they never expected to meet a criminal of all ponies at their Gala.
“Very well,” Celestia relented, smiling slightly. “What do you ask of us?”
Their eyes threatened to pop from their sockets when for the the first time, he smiled.
“I ask for your help in killing me.” He opened his wings and flapped a couple times. “Also, I think you need some new rope for me.”