//------------------------------// // Aloe and Lotus // Story: A Roll in the Hay // by Shahrazad //------------------------------// “What do you usually start with?” “Do you put on some music first?” “Uhhh, nnnope,” Big Mac replied. His eyes spun in their sockets, trying to follow the two mares as they walked around him. “Of course not— I don’t see a record player in here.” “How soft should the hay be?” “I would assume soft, but firm. Ponies need support, but I guess there’s some rather… vigorous physical activity that goes on here, correct?” “Eeeyup,” Big Mac drawled as his mind went to Mayor Mare. Wait a minute, she’s talking about— “And you collect payment upfront, yes?” Big Mac hardly had time to respond, much less get his thoughts in order. “Eeeyu—” “Of course he does. Does anything unusual go on? Can you refuse a client?” Big Mac answered the first question, but she nodded as if he had answered the second. “Eeeyup—” “Oh, that’s good.” “Then how can satisfaction be guaranteed if you don’t do everything the client wants?” “Uhhhh...” Big Mac mumbled, while his brain struggled to keep up. He almost jumped out of his horseshoes when he felt a pair of hooves on his back. Physically, he relaxed almost instantly at their touch. Caressing him softly, they moved the tension in his muscles around like oil sliding across glass. Or was it more like bubbles under wallpaper? The tension didn’t melt away, though— it all crept into his head. “You’re quite tense,” said the one behind him. His eyes went wide as the one in front of him approached. “I really want to get started, and I’d like to see you use that big… hoof of yours,” she said as she glanced down and giggled. “Lucky for you! I sure hope you know how to use a big… hoof like that one!” Big Mac blushed furiously; he could feel his entire body growing warmer. “What’s wrong? Are you embarrassed?” said the one behind him. She continued grinding her hooves expertly into his back. Big Mac grunted as a knot released at her touch, sending a wave of pleasure down his spine. “You must have many clients, Mr. Apple. Look at how many bits he has, Lotus!” It was the one in front of him, with the pink fur and the blue mane, who spoke. “I know! Tell us, Mr. Apple, how do you do it?” said the one behind him, Lotus. That meant Aloe was the one in front of him, rubbing his chest. It felt so good, but her question felt like a hornet had crawled into his head. “...” Big Mac just didn’t know what to say. How did he do it? He didn’t really know, exactly. The bits just sort of fell into his jar. And then… Aloe nuzzled into his neck and whispered into his ear, “Nervous? Me too. You don’t have to say anything, you can just show us.” She pushed into his chest, while the hooves behind him slid up to his shoulders and pulled him down. He ended up on his back. Big Mac gulped as he looked up at the ceiling. The two mares’ faces looked down at him, one each at the bottom and top of his vision. “Ready, Lotus?” “I think so,” Lotus replied. Taking a deep breath, she nodded to herself. “Yes, I think I can do this. It helps that Mr. Apple is such a handsome stallion.” Slowly, they both descended on him. Big Mac’s heart made its best attempt to explode straight out of his rib cage. Aloe and Lotus closed their eyes and prepared their lips, puckered, soft, close! “W-wait!” Both mares stopped as their eyes popped open, staring at him. He shook, ever so slightly. Big Mac licked his lips and cleared his throat. He spoke like he was walking on eggshells. His drawl became even thicker, but he did speak. And much more than one word. “Ah… uh… Ah don’t really know how Ah got inta this here business. Jus’ a fluke— Ah’m desperate.” A tear welled up in his eye. Aloe and Lotus glanced at each other, then back at Big Mac. They each laid down on either side of him, close enough that they only needed to whisper to be heard. Each laid a hoof over his chest, and gently traced circles on his fur. “Please, tell us about your business.” “Or demonstrate, if you prefer.” The thought of a demonstration spurred Big Mac to say more, much more. “Well… Ah… uh… ya see, the farm is in a bit of a pickle. Ah… uh… took a loan to expand the west field, and Ah used the deed ta the farm as collateral. Ah know what yer thinkin’, but it were a good idea at th’ time.” Despite the way Big Mac mumbled his confession, each mare absorbed every word. “So Ah needed ta make bits, an’ fast. This was th’ only thing Ah could think of. Guess Ah’m pretty stupid.” Lotus scoffed as Aloe exclaimed, “That’s not true, Mr. Apple! Look how many bits you’ve made! You must have satisfied every client!” Big Mac shook his head and sighed. “Ah suppose, but Ah haven’t slept with any of ‘em. Every mare that comes in here jus’ needs… somethin’. Why’re y’all so interested?” Aloe blushed and looked away. “Well, Mr. Apple, you see—” “Our spa business is in a bit of trouble as well,” Lotus finished. “The spa business is rather limited when it comes to scheduling. The only pony we had during the day was Mayor Mare, so we decided to branch out,” Aloe explained. “All of our clients want their spa treatments during the evening. This leaves our nights and days free. Now, I like to go to bed and get my beauty sleep just like the next mare—” “But what are we going to do the rest of the day? We decided that perhaps we could provide…” Aloe searched for the right words. Lotus found them. “Special services, in addition to our spa treatments.” Aloe giggled and said, “You wouldn’t believe the number of stallions that drop in and ask about ‘happy endings.’ I just look innocent and play dumb, but I know what they want.” Lotus sighed and her brows drooped. “It isn’t something we really want to do, but what choice do we have? Like you, we’re desperate. We have plenty of clients, but we can barely make ends meet.” “If it wasn’t for that mountain spring, and the tax write-off, we might be out of business already.” Aloe’s voice carried a sad note mixed into it. Big Mac blinked. “Ah’m sorry… what’s that ‘bout a mountain spring an’ a tax break?” Big Mac now had one ear pointed at each of them. The Apple family farm used water, A LOT of water. “Oh, we were trying to find a way to save money.” “So, we usually get our own water from this underground mountain spring every week.” “Since we’re not buying water from the city, it saves us a lot of money. It’s kept us afloat now that water is getting more expensive.” “Plus, we found a little-known rule in the Ponyville tax code: if you have extra water, you can sell it to the city, and they have to pay you for it at a rate equal to the tax on the water.” “It’s really not much, but the city is required to buy as much as you can provide.” “I guess when Ponyville was founded, they needed lots of water for the farmers—” “And they couldn’t get enough, so they turned to paying the citizens for it.” “The law never got repealed— thank Celestia for slow bureaucracies. It’s too bad the tax rate on water here is pretty low.” Big Mac’s eyes went wide. “Let me tell y’all a story. Ya see, this morning…” Big Mac told them about Mayor Mare and the new water tax. He also told them about the other mares he met. Their problems, their fears, their hopes and dreams. He told them about Cloudkicker and Mrs. Cake, and how close each came to making some serious mistakes. When he finished mumbling his story, he looked at them. They drew close to him, unblinking, focused on him like predators watching a weak member of a pack. “Mr. Apple…” Aloe blinked away tears. “You’ve saved us from making a huge mistake,” Lotus finished. “We certainly don’t want to break up any marriages…” Aloe looked away. “I didn’t even think about how it might affect other ponies.” Lotus covered her mouth with her hooves “But now we know, and we don’t have to take such a terrible risk.” Aloe smiled. “As long as you agree to help us,” Lotus said as she batted her eyelashes at him. “You see, we need help collecting more water.” “Would you be willing to help us?” “It’s quite heavy, and it’s a long way.” “But the profits should be worth it.” “You won’t have to buy water from the city anymore.” “The city will have to pay YOU instead.” “Not to mention the price is about to DOUBLE!” The three of them stood up, smiling at each other. Each mare put a hoof out, ready to bump his. “What do you say, Mr. Apple? Do we have a deal?” they asked in stereo. “Eeeyup,” he said, smiling as he hoof-bumped, sealing the deal. ~~~~~ With a hastily written and signed contract, Big Mac formed a three-way partnership with Aloe and Lotus to bring water to Ponyville. They would split the profits after supplying themselves with as much water as they needed. It would be hard work, but the spa ponies had the carts, tanks, and the deed to the underground spring, so he could only bring muscle to the table. It would save the farm next month, and into the foreseeable future. If only Big Mac could make the payment to the bank tomorrow. As the barn door closed, he could hear Lotus say, “Best fifty bits we’ve ever spent!” Aloe responded, “Indeed, the return on this investment should be quite handsome.” “Like the stallion!” Lotus giggled. Aloe replied, but at this point they were too far away for Big Mac to hear what else they said. Big Mac sighed and checked his jar; he almost had enough. Almost, but not there quite yet. The barn door creaked open again. Big Mac looked up— perhaps Lotus forgot to sign one of the documents? No, that couldn’t be Aloe and Lotus standing in the doorway. These two mares were much too short. Wait… one… two… three? Three mares? “Heya, big brother! Whatcha doin’?” Apple Bloom trotted into the barn. “Yeah, what’s going on?” Scootaloo said, right behind Apple Bloom. Sweetie Belle peeked out from Apple Bloom’s other side and asked, “Are you selling something?” Big Mac’s eyes went wide at the three fillies standing in his barn. Not good! Ah gotta git ‘em outta here! He cleared his throat and said, “Nothin’ special, ‘Bloom. Ah’m just tryin’ ta make a few extra bits. Go on home and do yer homework, and don’t ferget ta get cleaned up ‘fore supper.” “WOW, big brother, you must have done good! Look at all them bits!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, pointing at the jar. “Do you need some bits, Mister Apple?” Sweetie Belle asked. “Uhhh,” Big Mac mumbled. He didn’t want to reveal anything, but what could he say to explain all the bits he had? “I don’t have much, but here ya go.” Scootaloo slapped two bits into the jar. “Yeah, me too,” Sweetie Belle said as she dropped three bits into the jar. “My big sister says this is really important. It’s all the bits I have, but you’re welcome to them, Mister Apple. I think you really need them.” “Here ya go, big bro. Ah hope it helps,” Apple Bloom said, dropping a lone bit into the jar. Big Mac’s lower lip quivered. He scooped up all three fillies in a massive hug. “Awww, you’re welcome, Mister Apple,” Sweetie Belle chirped. “Cool, does this mean we get services?” Scootaloo asked. Big Mac froze, his eyes the size of dinner plates. His pupils shrank to mere pinpricks, locked onto the three fillies in his forelegs. Apple Bloom looked up at her brother, nodding. “Yeah, we paid. Ah know it ain’t full price, but it’s enough, right?” “Yeah, I demand service!” Scootaloo said, puffing herself up. “The sign says stratisfaction… satisfriction…” “Satisfaction guaranteed!” Sweetie Belle corrected. “I swear… walking dictionary,” Scootaloo mumbled under her breath. She cleared her throat. “Yeah, let’s do it! You in, Apple Bloom?” she asked as she turned to her friend and Big Mac’s younger sister. “Of course Ah am!”