//------------------------------// // Moving Forward // Story: A Love For Madness // by ShadeJak //------------------------------// I recalled an old episode where Fluttershy embarrassed herself and suddenly imagined being surrounded by a hallway of staring eyes. That was exactly what it felt like for me, now. I felt ashamed, small, and frightened and my parents haven’t even said or did anything yet to even express their opinion as they had not yet gotten out of the shocked phase upon seeing me for the first time. Alice managed to convince them to let us in before anyone saw me and we went into the living room and all sat down. Immediately I’d covered myself with the sheet Alice had given me again and just curled up, wishing I’d disappear as more uncomfortable scenarios played out in my mind. I could feel them staring at me, unable to believe the creature bundled under the sheet was once their son. It took all the willpower I had not to begin shaking all over again. Alice sighed and decided to break the ice. “Look, as crazy as it all sounds, what you saw was real, and that is Cale under that sheet. All the disappearances are connected, and are because the same thing happened to other people as well.” “Then why hasn’t the news said anything about it?” my father demanded. “We heard about the bombing in Washington state, and contact lost with Chicago. But nothing about… small talking horses.” “Well, two theories to that,” Alice explained. “One, who was gonna believe that? Two, I imagine anyone who had that happen to them would be too afraid to show themselves in public so I imagine a lot of the others are trying to hide. But… believe me, I’ve seen plenty of proof that what happened to Cale happened to others.” “And you’ve been hiding all this time, Cale?” my mother asked, making me feel even worse about myself for making them worry so much. “…Among other things…” I said softly, my voice trembling. “What do you mean?” my father asked. “W-when all this… when all this happened… I completely lost it!” I said, tilting my head up nervously under the makeshift hood of the sheet. “I needed help, I was so scared! I was seeing things! Having awful nightmares! I made it to a mental institute and tried to get help from people I hoped would be willing to… and I only got worse. HE wouldn’t leave me alone!” “He who?” my mother asked. “Discord!” I cried out, before realizing I’d probably only added more questions and made the whole situation even more awkward… and probably made myself look like I still should have been in a mental institute. It was then Alice decided to intervene. “Look, you remember that revival of Hasbro’s My Little Pony series that got the huge fanbase?” “How could I not, three of my co-workers were into it, and even more of them had daughters who were obsessed with it,” my dad said with an eyeroll. “Not to mention you and Cale watched it together when you were in high school.” I sighed a little; those were the days alright. “Well, the point is, apparently it’s all real. I don’t know how… I mean, maybe it’s like that theory Robert Heinlein wrote about where all fiction here is real somewhere else,” Alice explained. “The point is, that is your son right there. I know it sounds like the plot of a really screwed up fanfiction idea but basically Cale is the reincarnation of someone from another reality that the show was apparently based on, just like the others who disappeared over the last couple days. Apparently, one of the show’s villains was based on an actual existing entity from that reality who’s sort of a chaos god. He usurped control of that world and used some kind of curse that banished and reincarnated them here as humans, which wore off on the twenty-fifth anniversary of when it happened. From under the sheet I could see my parents staring at Alice like she were completely insane. Even with the rather compelling evidence to her claims that I presently was, her explanation did sound ridiculous beyond measure. My father facepalmed and shook his head. “Magic talking horses from girls’ shows, chaos gods, alternate worlds, my son turning into a character from that show?!” he asked, exasperated. “I swear, Alice, if I knew that pink horse claiming to be my son wasn’t sitting there, I’d have you committed right now for claims like that!” I recoiled a little from being called a pink horse, but I could understand my dad’s position. I think were I in his, I’d be acting the same way, I’d think the explanation the work of a seriously disturbed mind, and yet seeing a mythical alien creature resembling a small horse with my own two eyes I wouldn’t know what to make of it. “Y-you said… this… Discord, was it? Wouldn’t leave you alone? What did you mean?” my mother asked, as if deciding to humor us. “I had… nightmares. Hallucinations of him. Tormenting me, scaring me, reminding me of the divorce… he was following me around and making me lose it completely! I couldn’t tell what was real and what wasn’t anymore,” I explained. “I think he wanted it that way, I’m… this version of me… she was very important back in the other world.” I looked over at my dad, who still had his face buried in his hands and not looking at us. Frustrated, I peeled back the sheet and sat up. “Dad, please! It’s me! I didn’t ask to be this way. We went to the movies together for the first time when I was four! My favorite console was the Super Nintendo! I kept watching Supernatural even after it stopped bothering to make its monsters look like monsters! I brought Alice over after coming out to her parents went completely south! I had the lead in the school play for my senior year before a bunch of idiot parents demanded it cancelled because one character was an ex-prostitute! You were born in Colorado! For my first convention I—” My dad held up his hand to cut me off. I could feel my eyes watering and I hurriedly wiped them away with my forehoof and climbed off the sofa, sliding out of the sheet and revealing myself in my full, pink alicorn glory. “Mom, dad, w-whether I… whether I like it or not… this…” I began, looking myself over. “This is who I really am. But that doesn’t make me any less your child! It doesn’t change the fact that you both raised me as best you could, or that you cared for me and supported me all these years!” “I never said it did,” my dad said gently, gesturing invitation to join him and my mother on the couch. Smiling, I complied and sat with them, and both my parents embraced me. “I’m sorry I didn’t turn out quite the way… well any of us expected. I don’t think girly pink pony was anywhere on my list of things I planned on being,” I muttered. “Oh, that’s right, you’re obviously a girl…whatever you are, aren’t you?” my mom asked, looking me over. “Yeah… it took some getting used to,” I said. “The change in sex felt a little trivial compared to the change in species, though…” “You mentioned being in a mental hospital,” my dad said, concerned. “How did you get out? It doesn’t sound like something you’d just recover from overnight and you said something was hurting you?” “I had help…” I said softly. “It was when I saw there were others like me,” I felt tears forming again. “I’m so sorry I kept this all from you! I’m sorry I disappeared like that! I was scared! I didn’t know how you’d handle it, or if you’d even believe it was me! I was scared I’d get sent to a lab or something!” “Well, if you want us to be able to handle all of this as best we can, the least you can do for us is explain all that’s happened these past nine days,” my dad said, a little more sternly then I think he intended. “Sure, but it’s going to take a while…” I looked over at Alice, who gave me an assuring smile, and I began from the beginning, on my twenty-fifth birthday… ~ It had been awhile since I’d seen my dad near anything alcoholic. He normally only restricted it to social levels, but in this case I suppose he needed something to make all I told easier. I doubt I’d have been able to stomach it all in on his and mom’s end either, honestly. I had told them everything; the blackout on the precise hour I was born, the earliest changes to the final, traumatic transformation that made me 100% pink pony princess, Discord’s cruel mind games and the lowdown on the chaos god and the world he and I had originated from. I told them of my experiences in the mental institute, and Princess Celestia’s arrival where she had saved me from the aspect that had kept me in a state of utter madness. I told them what I’d learned from her and Luna about others in the world who had changed as well, and finally, I told them who I had been, of the kingdom this pony I’d become had once ruled, and most importantly, the family she once had and how now I needed to return to both. “Well, I admit I was hoping for grandchildren when you and Angela were together, I wouldn’t have expected it this way…” my mother mused. “If I ever find her, I hope I can introduce you,” I said, a small smile on my face. I noticed my dad just staring out the window and grew concerned. “Dad?” He remained silent a moment before he spoke, but didn’t turn towards me. “Cale… or Cadance…” his voice was low, not angry but concerned, something clearly bothering him. “I’d hoped we’d get to stay close with you even after you moved out. But this…” he finally turned and faced me. “Say you find a way back to that world… you made it clear you need to go back, and I understand it completely because it sounds like there’s a lot of responsibilities you have to take care of there…” “…But?” I asked. “I’m not sure we’ll ever see you again. I don’t mean if you somehow beat this… Discord character you told me about, but for all you know, it might mean you can’t ever come back. Who can say if once you go back to this world there’s no way to come here again?” he asked. I closed my eyes. For a moment I almost wished my parents had rejected me when they saw me this way; that they’d want nothing to do with me. It’d at least carry the perfect convenience of dismissing ties in the world I grew up in altogether once the grief had passed. But this… my parents still loved me, they still accepted me even in this body, with this life I had to go back to. In some ways it hurt a lot more to realize there was a strong chance I might never see them again. What if the portal from the movie got destroyed? What if it lost its power and could no longer be activated? What if some strategic homeland intervention enforcement and logistics division of the government got wind of it and then ahold of it and another way was needed, or they got ahold of it after and then there was no way back to earth? And even then, I had a duty to my kingdom that would tie me up so much I couldn’t afford to be away for two and a half years. “You’re right,” I said softly. “There is no way of knowing if I’ll ever come back once a way to Equestria is found, for so many reasons that would be completely beyond my control or not come without me questioning if I did the right thing. I got off the sofa and approached him, and put my forehooves around him, balancing on my hind legs. “But… I’d never, ever forget you and mom. I don’t think of either of you as any less of my parents. Even if it means you might never see me again, you won’t lose me, and when Equestria is safe again, I promise I’ll find a way to make sure you know that I’m alright.” My ear twitched as I heard my father put down his glass and slowly, he returned the hug. I heard my mother get up and join, and finally, Alice. It was all enough to make me break down completely, and for the next couple minutes I was held, my mother brushing her hand through my mane and I suddenly heard her chuckle a little. “What?” I asked, opening my eyes and looking up at her. “Oh, nothing. Just you have such lovely hair,” she teased. “It’s called a mane, mom,” I corrected, smiling a little. “And just because I look like this doesn’t mean it’s time to unload the girly treatment on me.” “She has a point; I think your man card expired when the Princess title came into play,” Alice joked. I rolled my eyes, recalling it had actually happened a little sooner then that. “Plus having been a knight captain’s wife, and a mother…” Alice continued. “Right, right, I get it, I’m one-hundred percent daughter now.” I muttered. Speaking of daughters… “Tomorrow… I’ve decided, I need to call Celestia, and tell her I’m going to meet up with her. I think I should help in finding a way back. It’s gonna be a long ride though.” “I’ll drive you,” Alice said. “I can call work, come up with something and they can do without me a couple days.” “Let us help, too… son… daughter…” my dad rubbed his temples a bit as I supposed he had to get used to the new gender pronouns he’d have to use on me. “An airplane’s probably the fastest way to go but there’s no way you’d be able to get aboard looking like you do, even if you hid in a pet carrier. Alice,” he said, looking over at my friend. “We’ll give you some money to make it over there, meals and gas and hotels combined are gonna ring you up a lot. Iowa’s a long round trip.” “Are you sure? I mean, I should still have money—” I began, my dad shushed me with a gently raised hand. “We’re your parents, like you said. We’ll help however we can,” he replied. “But would you two be willing to stay the night here before you go? I think both me and your mother would like to spend some time with you before you… well… go…” I nodded, smiling and I instinctively took to the air, my wings flapping as I hugged my father again from eye-level. ~ After dinner, a board game, and airing of an airing of the My Little Pony episodes that focused on me to help give my parents a better gist of who I had been, I was ready to turn in for the night. It was strange to see my old room having been converted to a guest room like it was. Even with the repainted walls, all trace of my presence erased from it, the shape and the pair of skylights still gave me a sense of nostalgia that brought a smile to my face. Video games. Homework. Hanging out with Alice… and Angela when her and I had been together… both good and the bad went through my mind but it was still, in a way, my room and always would be. The guest bed had been positioned where my old bed had once been that I’d grown up sleeping in. Using my magic to pull the covers back, I crawled in and tugged them up with my hoof, rolling onto my back and staring through the skylight nearest to the bed at the stars above. My parents had still accepted me, I had a life to go back to when the two that I’d lived had fallen to pieces. Yet… the bed had felt so empty when Angela had left me, the bed felt so empty now with my longing for Shining Armor… …For I oh so love the groom, for my thoughts, he does consume… As I closed my eyes, images slowly drifted into my mind as sleep began to overtake me. I felt exhausted, and I knew why. The tiny foal that Shining Armor held and smiled down at was all I needed to see to know what had happened. Twilight bounced around cheering in her usual adorable way like an excited schoolfilly. Shining closed his eyes, leaned over to me and I to him, and we nuzzled gently for a moment. The tiny pink alicorn foal, with the most beautiful eyes, blue as the sky itself, reached her tiny hooves out for me. Shining and I already knew the perfect name for her when Twilight asked. Skyla. I sat up, it was completely dark and again I was confused. Was it a memory? A dream? Both? Had Discord allowed more leeway into my past life or did he merely let fragments return to tantalize me, like a puzzle with so many pieces missing that I could not see the picture it’d form? I heard a giggling nearby, and I gazed down at the foot of the bed, my horn glowing to illuminate the room. There, staring up at me, was my daughter. She looked a little older, not the Crusaders’ age but no longer an infant. Maybe toddler age. “Mommy!” the filly said, reaching for me as I stared at her a moment. Cocking my head and climbed from the bed and to the floor. “Skyla?” I asked, reaching my hoof out. The alicorn filly giggled and ran to the door to my room that was now ajar, disappearing through the small opening. “Wait! Skyla! Come back!” I shouted, hurrying to the door and finding instead of a hallway leading to my parents’ room or the second guest room that Alice was using, a dark stairway leading up. Somehow, Skyla was already near the top, hopping up each step gleefully. Anxious, I attempted to follow, but somehow no matter how fast or slow I went, the stairs seemed to go on and on endlessly, and the eerie darkness they lead into drew no closer yet Skyla somehow continued to get farther toward it. Just as she reached the top, I noticed my surroundings changing the further I ascended, turning into blue crystal. Spreading my wings I flew as fast as I could and I found I finally seemed to be getting closer towards the top, and landed on a glasslike crystalline floor. At the end of a hallway, I saw Skyla wander into another door that’d been partially opened. “Skyla! Wait!” I cried out, galloping down the dark hall and to the door, swatting it open with my hoof and rushing through, suddenly finding myself outside. Looking around, I realized I was on the balcony of the palace of the Crystal Empire, and instead of a beautiful, shimmering kingdom of crystal illuminated by a starry sky, I saw a wasteland. Several buildings were in ruin, others were given wild colors, and others still hovered and spun about in the air on chunks of land that had been torn from the ground. The sky was obscured by flowing, deep crimson clouds; some swirled in place, others had pieces that broke off and darted about in random directions as a menacing wind howled around me. My eyes widened as I heard the sound of a young girl crying. “Skyla? Where are you?” I called out softly, looking around but seeing nothing. As I approached the edge of the balcony, I felt the hair on my neck stand up as though I wasn’t alone. Turning, I saw that indeed I wasn’t. The silhouette of what appeared to be a unicorn shrouded in a tattered cloak stood near the door. “Where is my daughter?” I demanded. The mare said nothing, instead her eyes and horn began glowing from beneath her hood, her cloak billowing in the winds as Skyla’s crying and Discord’s laughter echoed around us. Glaring at me, the mare immediately unleashed a blast of crackling green and purple magical power from her horn at me before I could avoid it. I jerked up from my bed, eyes wide in shock and finding myself back in my room, this time, however, completely alone. No Skyla, no Discord, no hooded mare, no ruined empire. What had that been about? Did Discord have allies other then those mercenaries Celestia spoke of roaming about? Ones that were from Equestria? I didn’t know, but I hoped to find answers soon. I’d thought to wake the others, but I didn’t want to bother them, I knew it’d only repeat anyway, until this was over… ~ “Hope that holds you two over before your road trip,” my mother said with a smile as Alice and I finished the delicious Belgian waffles she’d made us. I’d kept quiet about my dreams, maybe I could tell Alice later, when we found Celestia. I’d call her as soon as we stopped at my apartment and got my phone and some other things, and perhaps then they could help me with them. “It should,” I said. “Thanks, mom!” “I gotta say, Cadance, your parents completely outdo me when it comes to cooking awesome breakfast,” Alice joked before taking her last sip of orange juice. “I still miss bacon and sausage,” I pouted, my ears drooping as I stared longingly at the samples of both that my parents and Alice had gotten to enjoy. I remembered their wonderful taste, but knew they’d be a lot different with pony taste buds and an herbivore digestive system. “I just hope those hay-based substitutes the show has are just as good…” “At least now I don’t have to worry about you not eating your veggies,” my dad snarked, prompting an annoyed, ponylike snort from me. “Rub it in,” I said with an eyeroll. “We’ll give you the leftovers and a case of bottled drinks, it should get you through a few necessities on your trip as well,” my dad said while my mom began putting away the dishes. As much as I wanted to stay, I knew what I had to do, and with the length of the trip ahead of us, the sooner we left the better and a half hour later, we were bidding our goodbyes and getting back into Alice’s car. “Thanks so much, Mr. and Mrs. Amos. This all really means a lot,” Alice said, starting up her car. “Just keep in touch with us on your way there, so we know you made it safe,” my mom said. “Of course we will!” I said with a smile. “And… thanks again… for not turning your backs on me. I can’t tell you how much it all takes off my back,” one of many things, but one less was still something I could appreciate despite everything. “Cale… or Cadance…” my mom began. “Regardless of who you are, you’re still ours. Even with the problems you went through over the last year, I know you’re capable enough to handle what’s waiting for you. Human or pony,” she said, making me blush a little. I could feel the tears threatening to come again, knowing this may have been the last time I’d see them, but I held them back, keeping on a brave face. I hoped with all my heart that Equestria could be saved, and I could one day find a means to see them again and introduce them to the family I sought to regain. “Well… I guess Alice and I had better be going…” I said, trying to keep a smile. “I’m going to miss you both so much!” I reached through the car window and hugged them both tightly as best I could, and moments later, Alice and I were on the road again. ~ I bobbed my head to the pony dubstep music Alice’s stereo played, admittedly some of the tracks were enjoyable though I found myself drifting more towards classical these days. When I’d mentioned this, though, Alice refused as the last thing she’d want is to get sleepy on the road. Twenty minutes had gone by since we’d left my parents’ house, and for the first time in awhile, despite the unsettling dreams I’d experienced even after my release from the mental institute, I felt a little more optimistic as we drove down the empty road. “So we’re set, right?” I asked, looking over at Alice as she drove. “Hey, this car’s been itching for another cross-states trip, it’ll be fun!” Alice replied, smirking. “We get to your apartment and find anything worth bringing, call Celestia and tell her we’re coming over to help, I get time from work, we get some snacks, some more gas, and we’ll be a little closer to uniting you with your true love and save the wor—" . . . We never saw the armored van that, with some malevolent purpose, suddenly flew from an intersection we were passing until it struck us. A deafening crash, a fierce jerk, everything spinning, and then rolling. When the car finally stopped I struggled to free myself from the crushed seat, my body aching from the bruises all over. “Alice?! ALICE?! Are you okay?!” I pleaded, nudging my friend who lay against the drivers-side window of the overturned car. She coughed, and struggled to move, she looked noticeably banged up as well, and barely conscious with several cuts and bruises all over her. Before she could answer me, though, I heard footsteps rushing towards us and the passenger window was smashed open. Mens’ voices argued around me and before I could react a sack was thrown over me, and suddenly I could feel blunt objects on the other side striking me over and over. "Just like the boss said... an alicorn!" one accented male voice said. “What about the woman?” another accented male voice asked, so faint and distant as I felt consciousness rapidly fading. “Leave her, we got what we came for,” the first voice ordered. “Tell the boss we’re ready to bring this one in…” Alice… All around me, the voices of the men who had taken me, the sound of everything… all faded into silent blackness… END ACT 2...