//------------------------------// // And Cute-Faced Unicorns // Story: Spring is Dumb // by HoofBitingActionOverload //------------------------------// Rainbow Dash stepped outside. It felt much cooler out than it had been when she had gone inside the jewelry store, and she saw some clouds she hadn’t noticed earlier. She dropped the necklace in the cart and tucked it down in between some of the flowers and pastries, so that if anyone happened to go digging through the cart to get at the flowers and pastries, they would find the necklace by surprise. Rainbow smiled at the thought and began trotting forward, still pulling the cart behind her. Then she stopped. She didn’t know where to go next. No, she realized, it was even worse than that. She knew exactly where she needed to go. She just didn’t want to go there. That wasn’t true, either, really. She wanted to go there. More than anything else. She couldn’t think of anyplace she would rather be. But she didn’t know if she should, or if enough time had passed yet, or if she would know what to say when she got there. Rainbow Dash turned and dug the necklace back out of the cart. She held it up to watch the sunlight flare off the sides of the sapphire and land in a dozen blue, glowing shadows on the ground. Looking at it made her feel better. As she turned it over in her hoof, she remembered one more life-defining principle, this one more important than any of the others. She needed to apologize to Rarity. It was a happy coincidence that she had bought all of these things Rarity liked, though. Happened totally by chance. What were the odds? The garden-somethings and not-alien-dipped-in-chocolate and necklace would make Rarity happy, and Rainbow Dash wished she could do something to make Rarity happy. And ponies were supposed to buy their marefriends gifts when they apologized, right? Rarity probably thought so. Rainbow Dash tucked the necklace back into the cart and set off at a full canter in the direction of Carousel Boutique. She moved quickly and with purpose. She knew exactly where she was going, why she was going there, and what she would do when she got there. Best of all, she knew everything would be okay, just so long as her cart and everything in it made it there safely, Rarity would forgive her. “Hey, boss!” a voice called from overhead. Rainbow Dash looked up without stopping, and saw Flitter gliding down towards her. “You’re in a hurry, huh?” Flitter asked, hovering beside her and matching Dash’s speed. “You trying to get inside before the rain starts?” “What rain?” Dash asked, never once slowing her pace. It wasn’t scheduled to rain for another week. “The emergency rainstorm you asked us to get together this morning,” Flitter answered. “And I’d like to point out that I’m the only member of the weather team that took your order seriously. I had to set up the entire storm all by myself. I wrote everypony’s names down who didn’t help so you can demerit them later.” Flitter grinned. “But it’ll be worth it once we get to see all these stupid lovey-dovey ponies get soaked on their perfect little spring strolls, right, boss?” Rainbow Dash stopped all at once, so suddenly she nearly got herself run over by the still-speeding cart. “You didn’t.” Flitter nodded. “I did. It’s gonna be a doozy, too. I brought in all the heaviest rainclouds I could find. I even grabbed a few from over the Everfree Forest. We’re seriously going to ruin a few ponies’ day. This is probably the coolest thing you’ve ever asked us to do. You’ve got my respect for, like, ever. This’ll be hilarious!” “Why would you do that?” Rainbow Dash asked. “I never asked you to do that.” “Yeah, you did,” Flitter answered, and then scowled. “And somepony has to teach all these other ponies a lesson that some ponies just got out of relationships, and maybe they want to be able to go for a walk without having to see a bunch of ponies sucking face all over the place, and maybe it’s not fair to them because they don’t want to be constantly reminded that they’re alone because their coltfriend broke up with them to go move in with a male model in Canterlot.” Rainbow Dash blinked at her. “I definitely never asked you to do that.” “You definitely did,” Flitter insisted. “I remember exactly what you said. You charged into the weather office this morning even though you weren’t scheduled for today and shouted at everypony about how much you hated spring and that you wanted us to cook up the worst storm Ponyville has ever seen so all those stuck up ponies wouldn’t be able to enjoy it anymore. And that’s exactly what I did. You’re welcome, by the way.” Rainbow Dash cursed under her breath. She said the dumbest things sometimes. Why the hay did Cloudsdale put her in charge of an entire town’s weather team? This was more their fault than hers. The Central Weather Office should have known better. She would give them a stern talking to about the proper delegation of responsibilities the next time she was in Cloudsdale. “You have to stop it!” Dash said quickly. “I don’t want the storm anymore.” “It’s a little late for that,” Flitter said, then looked down into the cart. “Hey, what’s with all the flowers?” “When is the storm supposed to start?”          Flitter shrugged and pointed up. Rainbow Dash looked up and saw the clouds she had noticed earlier, and saw more quickly rolling in to join them, and had they been colored such an angry black-grey before? As if in answer to her question, a fat, wet drop of water fell right into her eye. And then what must have been at least a million, billion other raindrops roared down all around her, immediately soaking Rainbow Dash, her cart, and all of Ponyville. “Do you want me to get you an umbrella?” Flitter asked, shouting to be heard over the sound of the rain. Rainbow Dash sighed and began walking towards Carousel Boutique again, much slower than before. __________________________________________________ Rainbow Dash plodded through the muddy street. The rain was thinner now, but it had already thoroughly soaked her mane, her coat, her bones, her skull, and her cart. Rainwater filled the cart to its brim, sloshing and splashing over its sides every time the wheels hit a bump or a rock. The garden-somethings were ruined, the not-alien-dipped-in-chocolate was inedible, and the necklace had probably spilled out. But at least Carousel Boutique was only one building away. Rainbow Dash slowly walked by that last building and stopped in front of the Boutique. Normally, she would have flown in through one of the second floor windows. Rarity usually kept one of them unlocked for her. But it was probably locked now, and Rainbow didn’t know how she would have gotten the cart through anyway. Besides, without the flowers or the pastries or the necklace, what was the point? Rarity wouldn’t forgive her just because she said sorry. But Rarity was the point, Dash decided, and suddenly found herself standing right in front of the door before she realized that she had stepped forward at all. She knocked loudly. “I apologize, but the Boutique is closed for the evening,” Rarity’s voice called from somewhere inside. “You are welcome to come back tomorrow.” “Rarity, it’s me,” Dash called back, knocking again. Rarity didn’t answer. Dash knocked again. “Please open up.” Rarity still didn’t answer. “Come on, Rarity, please!” No answer. Dash knocked one more time. And Rarity still didn’t answer her. “Please?” Dash said, too quietly for Rarity to have heard, and rested her forehead against the wet door. “I’m sorry, and it’s raining, and I’m really sorry, and all of your flowers got messed up, and I’m really, really sorry.” Rarity still didn’t answer, and Rainbow Dash sighed. “I’m sorry,” Rainbow said again, and began turning around. The door abruptly opened. Rarity stood in the doorway and gave her a harsh look. Rainbow Dash winced and moved to leave before she did anything else wrong. But when Rarity got a full view of her rain-soaked, tired, muddy face, her features immediately softened. “Oh, darling,” Rarity said, frowning and pulling her back towards the doorway. “You’re a mess. Come inside before you catch a cold.” Rainbow Dash nodded and began stepping inside. But Rarity stopped her with a hoof. “Please leave your cart outside.” “It’s important,” Dash replied. “I really need to bring it in.” Rarity looked between Rainbow and the cart, and then sighed. “If you insist,” she said, picking up some of the water from the cart in her magic and spilling it on the ground. “But please leave it by the doorway.” Rainbow Dash stepped inside, dragging the cart behind her. The warmth of Carousel Boutique hit her first, immediately beginning to drive off the cold of the rain that had settled in her coat, and the smell of Carousel Boutique hit her second. The Boutique always smelled like perfumes, herbal tea, and fresh fabrics. It smelled like home. “You’re a mess,” Rarity said again, fussing with Dash’s dripping mane. “You must feel miserable. What were you doing out in that storm?” “I had to come see you,” Dash answered. “Oh, darling…” Rarity floated some towels towards her. “Let me dry you off.” Rainbow Dash recognized those towels. They were what Rarity called ‘the good linen.’ She never let Rainbow Dash touch them, and she only used them during special occasions, like important dinners she worked hard to prepare for her close friends and family. Rainbow pulled away from her. “Don’t use those ones. I’m all muddy. It’ll ruin them.” “I’ll use whichever towels I choose,” Rarity said. “They are mine to ruin. Now hold still.” Rainbow Dash complied. Rarity ran the towels, soft as silk blankets, through her mane and then down her coat. She kneaded Dash’s neck and then her chest and then her wings in gentle, comforting circles. Rarity heated the towels with her magic while she worked, so that Dash warmed as she dried. Dash closed her eyes for a little while and pretended everything was okay. Rarity worked quickly and efficiently. When she finished, Rainbow Dash was warm and dry, her mane was a frizzy mess, and the good linen was dripping with mud. Rarity winced when she examined them, but floated them off toward the kitchen with a small smile. “Is there anything I can get for you?” she asked. “Are you cold? Would you like a blanket, or perhaps some hot tea?” Rainbow Dash shook her head. “Well, then, I—Oh.” Rarity trotted past Dash and to the cart. She scooped up one of the soggy, limp bouquets. “Are these gardenias?” “They were,” Dash answered. Rarity sniffed at one. “It’s a shame they got caught in that storm. Gardenias are my favorite flower.” “Yeah…” Rainbow Dash kicked at the floor. “Mine, too.” “And what are these?” Rarity asked, fishing one of the pastries out of the cart. “Is this a sfogliatelle?” “I guess.” “My word,” Rarity said, pulling out half a dozen more. “How many of these did you buy? This must have cost you a fortune.” Rainbow Dash shrugged. Rarity peered down into puddles at the bottom of the cart, leaning in and narrowing her eyes. “I think there’s something shining in here.” Rainbow winced and looked down. Rarity’s eyes widened as she raised the necklace out of the cart. She held it up into the air, and water dripped off the sapphire and back into the cart, while the Boutique’s lights glinted off its shimmering sides. She looked to Dash. “What is this?” “I, um…” Rainbow Dash kept looking down. “I thought it looked like your eyes. You don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to.” “This is for me?” Rarity asked. “But you don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to.” “It’s lovely,” Rarity said, already putting it around her neck. “Of course I’ll wear it. Thank you.” Dash smiled a little. “Yeah…” “This wasn’t all for me, was it?” Rarity asked, gesturing to the cart. “Yeah.” Dash nodded again. “But it got rained on. That’s sort of my fault, too. I’m sorry.”          “Rainbow,” Rarity said, trotting towards her, the sapphire swaying from her neck, its color a near perfect match to Rarity’s blue eyes. “Why on earth did you buy all of this for me?” “Because I wanted to say sorry,” Dash answered simply. Rarity shook her head. “Dear, you don’t have to buy me things in order to say sorry.” “Yes I do,” Dash insisted. “Because I embarrassed you and messed up your dinner and then I yelled at you, and I messed up, and I’m sorry.” “I appreciate the gesture. I truly do, but I assure you that you never need to buy me anything to earn my forgiveness,” Rarity said, smiling. “All the same, thank you. This was very sweet of you. I forgive you.” Rainbow Dash waited for Rarity to go on, to name stipulations, to chide her again, to yell at her, or anything else that wasn’t good. But Rarity turned and began walking away instead. “Would you mind helping me with a little spring cleaning?” she asked, glancing over her shoulder. “I was about to take a bath, but it can wait.” Rainbow Dash blinked, standing still. “Rainbow Dash?” Rarity asked, turning around. “Is something wrong?” “That’s it?” Rainbow Dash asked. “What’s it?” “That’s all you’re going to say?!” Rainbow Dash cried. “You’re gonna forgive me just like that? Aren’t you going to yell at me?” “Of course I won’t yell at you. Why would you think that?” “That was our first fight!” Dash said. “And I said some really mean stuff to you.” Rarity trotted back to her. “I would be lying if I said I didn’t share any blame, and I said some nasty, hurtful things as well. Now that I think about it, I should be the one apologizing to you. I’m sorry. I hope that you can forgive me.” Rainbow Dash blinked again, and Rarity gave her a small nuzzle. “Is that better?’ Rarity asked. Rainbow Dash shook her head. “That’s even worse! You can’t apologize to me. It ruins everything. It can’t be over just like that. I’ve been thinking about this all day. This is supposed to be a big deal! Don’t you still feel angry?” “I’m not angry anymore, and no great harm was done,” Rarity replied with a shrug. “If I’m being honest, the only thing I’m feeling now is confused, confused as to why you said anything about it in the first place. Why did you ever think it would be appropriate to talk about that in front of my little sister? And my parents! And those sounds you made! I don’t understand what you could have been thinking.” “I just…” Rainbow looked down at her hooves. “You just what?” “I wanted to tell ponies about us,” Dash said quietly. “But you could have told them anything else. Anything would have been more appropriate than what we do together in the bedroom. You could have talked about anything you wanted other than that one subject, and that’s the subject you chose to talk about. I don’t understand it. You could have said anything other than what you said last night.” “Nuh uh.” Dash shook her head. “Nothing else would have shown them that we’re actually together.” Rarity raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean? We’ve been together for weeks, and everypony knows it.” “I didn’t know it,” Dash said. “I mean, I knew we were hanging out a lot, and I knew you liked me, which was really exciting, because no pony as beautiful or smart as you has ever liked me before. It’s usually just jocks. But we never did anything together that we couldn’t have done if we were just friends, except make out some, and that’s not even a big deal. I just thought, I don’t know, you’d get bored or something. And even though I was really excited, I didn’t tell anypony about us, because I thought that if you did get bored and we never started dating for real, everyone would know that I fooled myself into thinking somepony as amazing as you liked me, and everyone would think I was a joke.” Rarity frowned. “I would nev—” “But then we did that!” Dash cried, her wings flaring. “We did that, and I knew for sure we weren’t just friends anymore, because friends never do that. I actually knew for sure that I was marefriends with Rarity! With you! You’re the most beautiful, talented, confident pony I’ve ever met, and I’m your marefriend! I know you told me not to tell anypony, and I am sorry. But this is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me, and I had to tell everypony. Because we’re together, for real, we’re really together, and I wanted everypony to know. I’m sorry, but I just had to tell them. I couldn’t keep something this good inside.” Rarity quietly stared at her for a long time, looking slightly confused, while Rainbow Dash waited and worried what she would say next. “I’m really sorry,” Dash said again. Rarity laughed, a musical, happy laugh. “You’ve always acted so tough,” she said, still smiling. “But you’re really just the sweetest pony, aren’t you?” “No I’m not,” Dash said quickly. “Yes you are,” Rarity said, and then kissed her on the cheek. “And it’s beautiful. You’re absolutely wonderful and sweet.” “I’m still tough, though,” Dash mumbled. “Of course you are.” Rarity laughed, but then her face hardened. “And, now, we need to set some matters straight. Firstly, we are together. I assure you of that. I like you, and I plan on being with you for a long time after this. Secondly, I’m excited to be with you, too. Because you’re Rainbow Dash, the fastest flyer in Equestria, soon-to-be Wonderbolt, and I’m your marefriend. I want to tell other ponies about us, too, and I want you to tell other ponies about us.” “Oh, cool, because I—” “But not about that part of us,” Rarity continued, poking Dash in the chest. “That’s something that I want to be just for us, and no pony else. I want to share that part of my life with you, and only you. No pony else. Do you understand what I mean?” Dash grinned and nodded. “Yeah.” “And I especially don’t want to share that part of my life with my parents or little sister,” Rarity said, and looked at Dash very seriously. “Uh, yeah.” Dash blushed slightly. “Got it. No parents or sisters. And, uh, we’re still marefriends, right?” Rarity smiled and leaned forward, and then pressed their lips together in one, long, warm, soft kiss. “What do you think?” Rarity asked after she pulled away. “I think I really hope we are,” Dash said. “And I think we are, but it would make me feel a lot better if I heard you say so.” Rarity laughed, then wrapped a hoof around her neck and pulled her close. “We are. I’m your marefriend, and I’m going to stay your marefriend for a long time.” Tension and anxiety dripped out of Dash just like the rainwater had earlier, and comforting, happy relief took their place. She slumped a little against Rarity and sighed. “Thanks.” “Absolutely.” Rarity gave her a small squeeze. “Is there anything else you’re worried about?” “I forgive you, too,” Dash said quietly, enjoying the feeling of Rarity holding her. She had always known Rarity would forgive her. She had totally nailed the apology, too. The necklace had been a home run, just like she knew it would, and she hadn’t even needed the flowers and pastries. Rarity was too classy a mare to be bought over with flowers and pastries. Necklaces helped, though. “Thank you.” Rarity smiled playfully and drew a hoof along Dash’s cheek. “I suppose I should do something to thank you for this necklace, too, shouldn’t I?” “Nah, that’s okay. It was a present.” “Oh.” Rarity’s smile fell, but then quickly returned. “Well, you must still be cold, though, yes? I was about to have a hot bath, and I’d be perfectly willing to share it with somepony, if you’re willing.” “Nope,” Dash replied, shaking her head. “I’m not cold at all anymore. Those towels worked great. I can help you clean now, though, if you want.” “I don’t think you understand,” Rarity said. She leaned forward and kissed Dash on the cheek again, and her lips lingered. “Are you sure you aren’t cold?” “No, I’m really not,” Dash said. And she really wasn’t. She felt perfectly warm, especially with Rarity hanging on to her and nibbling lightly at her neck like that. Really, Rainbow Dash didn’t particularly enjoy baths. She had always been more of a shower mare. But it didn’t seem like the right time to bring that up. She and Rarity would cross that particular bridge in their relationship when they came to it. Rarity gave up nibbling at her neck, rolled her eyes, and took a step back. “All right, then…” She focused and picked up the puddled water at the bottom of the cart with her magic, then shaped it into a ball. “What are you doing?” Dash asked. Rarity smirked and hovered the ball of water over Dash’s head. “Um, Rarity?” Rarity released the ball of water, and immediately soaked Rainbow Dash with cold rainwater again. “Agh!” Dash cried, spitting water out of her mouth. “What the hay was that for?” “Now you’re cold,” Rarity explained. “I suppose you’ll have to share that hot bath with me after all.” “No, I need another towel,” Dash said, trying to shake the water out of her mane. “What’s wrong with you?” Rarity leaned in next to Dash’s ear. “Darling,” she whispered, “please, take the hint. I want to share a hot bath with you to help warm you up.” Dash’s eyes widened. “Wait, do you mean…?” Rarity grinned a most unladylike grin and nodded. Rainbow Dash instantly shot up the stairs towards the bathroom. She had always loved baths. The bath very well might have been the greatest invention in all of pony history. She often said that no pony was truly clean if they didn’t take at least seven baths a day. And she hadn’t had a single one yet! She needed to get to that bathtub as soon as she could! She heard Rarity following behind her at a trot, laughing softly.