Word spread quickly through the palace as the ponies who worked there encountered each other in the halls. Two maids had seen the Countess of Canterlot ranting at the Princess near the front door before walking off in a depressed slump. They had rushed off and informed the cleaning staff, who told the kitchen staff, who then told the guard and butlers, and in less than five minutes nearly every pony who called the palace their place of work knew the situation. The staff cleared a path for her to sulk back to her room unhindered, the hallways around her completely void of any living creatures. Occasionally a pair of eyes would glance around a door or corner, watching the upset mare trod down the halls.
Twilight was too busy going over the numbers in her head again and again to notice that the usually busy halls were utterly empty and that her slow, methodical hoofsteps were the only noises around her. Her gaze was set on the tiles a few steps ahead of her and she only paid attention enough to avoid getting lost. Each time she finished her bout of mental calculations her steps faltered for a moment, Twilight would pause and just stand there sullenly before resuming her slow trek through the palace.
She kept getting the same answer, no matter what methods, formulas, or variables she tried to use in her equations: There was simply no realistic way of crossing realities in any way, shape, or form.
Logically, she had accepted that the world around her was real from the moment she spoke to Celestia. There was no denying that the world she saw and interacted with was real. This world wasn’t a dream. Emotionally, she had been refusing to accept it as real. No matter what Celestia and Spike had said, part of her clung to the thought that there was a home to get back to. Now she was face to face with the only conclusion she had left.
The sound of a door opening brought her attention to the world around her once more. She had just stepped into the bedroom she shared with Celestia. She didn’t even realize she had already arrived, and magicked the door open without a second thought. The twin beds positioned next to each other in the darkened room looked inviting, elegant yet remaining simple with their silky sheets. The desk covered in scrolls and parchment that Celestia and Spike worked at was off to one side, covered in all the work they did on a daily basis while her body had laid in its coma. This was her home now. This had always been her home.
Twilight brought a hoof up to her face and rubbed at her eyes. She wasn’t sure when she had started crying, but it must have been while she was walking through the halls. Very slowly, she moved over to her overly-large bed and climbed in. Not bothering to slide under the sheets, she just laid on her side and stared off into space. Her blank gaze, while unfocused, was vaguely on the large desk across the room. She sighed, and brought up her final conclusion. This was her home. No library-in-a-tree waiting for her. No friends in Ponyville looking for her. “This is my home.” The sound of her own voice, slightly echoed in the large room, sounded different than how she was imagining.
There was no wobble in her voice to show that she was crying, even though she could still feel tears running down her face. There was no hesitation at making such a declaration. “This is my home,” she said again, wanting to confirm something she had noticed last time she said it. The words didn’t sound like a lie. They didn’t sound forced or awkward. They sounded true. With a loud sigh, Twilight rolled onto her back and looked up at the ceiling. She wished this was Discord’s doing, but it just wasn’t his style. He’d never whisk her off without following along so he could laugh at her. If he were to break apart the Elements of Harmony, he’d do so in a way that was fun for him.
“This is my home, and my memories are just a dream,” Twilight muttered to herself once again, closing her eyes and relaxing. A shiver ran down her spine as that fact settled in her mind. It was the only reasonable conclusion to draw. All the data pointed to it. She stretched and pulled a blanket over her with a bit of magic, letting the warm sheet fall over her completely, leaving only her tail sticking out. She curled up, her tears still running down her face and creating a small wet spot in the sheets, and tried to not think about anything. She wanted to clear her mind of all this.
It only somewhat worked; every time she felt that her mind was clear, something would float up from the depths of her subconscious and remind her of her previous life. She tried taking deep breaths, but that only reminded her of when Cadence used to help her calm down from panic attacks as a child. She tried counting in her head, focusing on keeping the string of increasingly large numbers going, but an imaginary Pinkie Pie would break in and interrupt her after every few hundred numbers.
Each time she was reminded of her previous life, the tears would start up again. When she remembered that Shining Armor was dead—a fate worse than simply never existing in the first place—she started to sob, her body tensing up. At one point she vaguely remembered a maid trying to get her attention, but Twilight couldn’t even collect herself enough to ask to be left alone. The maid was gone a minute later, and Twilight nearly forgot she had been there to begin with.
When her tears finally dried, Twilight pulled the sheet off from over her head and looked around. The room was dark and empty, unchanged except for a tray with some daisy sandwiches placed on the foot of the bed. Twilight wasn’t hungry, so she ignored them, instead trying to find a clock. She knew she had gotten back from the library around dinner time, and it was now late into the evening. She had laid there crying for several hours, it seemed. With a sigh she flopped back down, laying still. “What am I going to do now?” She asked herself aloud.
The answer floated up in her mind and drew her attention to it. It was rather obvious; it had been her plan from the start after all. “Learn about the world and do my best to serve Equestria and Celestia.” Her voice had a surprising amount of confidence. Twilight blinked, wondering where she was getting this confidence. Her first try at holding court had been exhausting but enjoyable, but she was still nervous about handing anything serious.
Of its own volition, her hoof moved up and rubbed her eyes to remove some of the drowsiness that had settled. Twilight began talking to herself aloud. “Listen to me, Twi. You can do this. Celestia wants you by her side, running Equestria, and you’re just the mare to do it. No pony else knows Celestia like you do. No pony else can memorize entire books like you can. You’re going to take hold of this life and run with it. No looking back now.” A hint of red spread across her cheeks. That was the sort of pep talk she imagined Spike would give her, or maybe even something Shining Armor would say. It seemed silly, but it did the job she needed it to do. She was feeling a bit better about her situation.
Tomorrow morning, she decided, would be the start of her new life. She would do her best to embrace the world she lived in, without forgetting her wonderful dream. The lessons she learned from making friends would be helpful in this life. She was sure of it. Twilight recognized she had a lot to learn about running the court and making laws, but she had plenty of time. Celestia and Spike were there to help guide and teach her. The Countess of Canterlot would bring a new understanding of friendship and magic to the royal court of Equestria. That brought a small smile to her face.
The mare in the moon was back. Twilight looked around, trying to figure out her surroundings. She was on the balcony of her library in Ponyville, looking up at the rising celestial body. The familiar shape of the mare in the moon was clearly visible on the bright lunar surface, looking the same as it had during the years before she arrived in Ponyville. The town around her was just as she remembered, down to all the details she would expect, save one. It was still. And not sleeping still. But ghost-town still.
Not a single light shone through any of the buildings, and no ponies were out for a late night stroll. It was completely dark and silent over all of Ponyville. Twilight climbed over the balcony railing and jumped. As she expected, she gently floated down to the ground. “A dream then. Figures,” she muttered to herself. “I suppose that’s all it’s ever been. That would be why I know all the details.” She took off walking, heading for Town Hall. “I mean, why else would I know that the fact that one of the four shutters on that house is painted the wrong color?” She pointed her hoof at the incorrect shutter. “I know because when Trixie took over Ponyville, that house was damaged, and the ponies that lived there were lazy about getting it repaired!”
Twilight stormed over to another house, for some reason feeling worked up and angry at Ponyville. She peered in the windows of one of her neighbors. It was furnished just as she remembered.. “And this home! I know for a fact that there are an odd number of steps to get to the second floor and that the third from the top creaks! Because this is Berryshine’s house and I’ve been over here to celebrate her birthday! Berryshine was the pony who got me to try alcohol for the first time, and I absolutely hated it!”
She ran over to a home she had never visited, the inside bare of any furniture and most likely any tenants. Twilight stared in through the window, her breath fogging up the glass, a scowling face being reflected back at her. “And I have no idea which ponies live here. I never met them. So of course my dream world left the house blank! It was enough that the house was here, to give the impression of this being a real town!” Twilight gave a half growl, half cry of frustration as she kicked a hoof against the empty house.
The thump of her irritated attack echoed through the empty town. She took several slow and deep breaths as she attempted to calm herself down. While Twilight had fallen asleep feeling better about her situation, being here in a dream version of Ponyville made it obvious that she still had a way to go before she fully accepted her new life. She would probably have several dreams like this one over the new few days, or even weeks, until she felt better about her situation. It would just take some time, was all.
A voice on the wind caused Twilight’s ears to perk up. She could very faintly hear her name being called. Her dream was changing, it seemed. Wanting to at least see what was going on, she allowed herself to calm down before she galloped over to Town Hall and leapt in the air. The dream world logic allowed her to glide through the air like a pegasus. She landed on the roof of a nearby home and looked around. “Hello?” She called out, hoping for an answer.
“Twilight Sparkle…” The voice said once more. In a way, it sounded faintly... familiar. There was a certain inflection to the tone, but she couldn’t put a hoof on it. Twilight could barely hear it, but it sounded like it was coming from the Everfree forest.
The forest looked exactly as it did the first time she journeyed into it; grim, black, and mysterious. The familiar path to Zecora’s looked unwelcoming under the moonlight. “Now you want me to go rushing into the dangerous forest. Well dream, guess what? No! I’m not going to play along with your twisted subconscious games. Whatever it is can come to me.” She sat down and crossed her forelegs, glaring at the forest as if daring whatever it was to come out.
A harsh breeze blew past Twilight, causing her mane and tail to whip about her frame in a frenzy. She raised a hoof to block her eyes, noticing something moving near the forest. “Twilight Sparkle!” The voice was clearer now. There was a pony emerging from the forest, calling her name. A very familiar pony.
Twilight’s jaw slowly opened and stayed that way. She slowly stood back up, surprise making her movements nearly mechanical, as she looked out at the shape of the familiar alicorn. “Princess Luna?”
With a soft gasp, Twilight found herself lying in bed, pressed up against something warm and soft. She looked over and found Celetia holding her, smiling down at her in the soothing light of the morning sun. “You were having a nightmare,” the Princess whispered comfortingly. Twilight’s face turned bright red as she nuzzled Celestia’s chest, hugging the larger mare as tightly as she could. Celestia hugged her back just as tight. “Want to tell me about your dream?”
Twilight shook her head, her nose rubbing into Celestia’s pristine coat. “It was just a stupid dream about my… My dream life,” she whispered back, her words slightly mumbled.
Celestia’s eyebrows raised slightly as she gave the smaller mare a gentle but loving squeeze. “Dream life? Not alternate world?”
“No… I… I don’t think I came from an alternate world anymore. It was all just a dream.” Twilight gently pulled away from the Princess and looked up at her. Celestia’s smile was warm and her eyes had a touch of understanding and pride. Twilight’s mind raced through everything she had been thinking about the previous night, all the things she wanted to explain to Celestia. The look that Celestia was giving her stopped her thoughts. The Princess understood and was there for her, for which Twilight felt eternally grateful.
A nearby clock gave a soft chime as the hour rolled over. Celestia’s smile turned into a playful grin. Twilight’s brain suddenly flashed all sorts of warnings; this was a dangerous grin. “Tell you what, Twilight. I want you to come join me for a nice relaxing bath.”
“W-What?” Twilight’s voice squeaked, her eyes snapping wide open. She quickly covered her mouth, not wanting to disturb Spike. That caught her completely off guard and sent her mind into all sorts of dark corners that she would deny ever having thought about. She took a moment to calm down and rid herself of the evil and somewhat disturbing thoughts, bringing her mind to a place safe enough where she could whisper a reply once more. She was still rambling slightly as she tried to find a way to decline politely. “I- I- I’m fine, Celestia. You don’t… I mean I’m honored, but… You don’t have—”
“I wasn’t asking you, Twilight,” Celestia said, interrupting the rambling mare mid-sentence. Her tone was still warm, but bode no room for argument. She climbed off the bed and lifted Twilight with her golden aura. “Now, you will sit calmly on my back until I tell you to get down.” As she spoke, Twilight was gradually set down on the Princess’s large back between her wings. For the second time in three days, Twilight held on to Celestia as she was carried about like a small filly.
“Yes, your majesty,” the Countess muttered softly, looking out at the bedroom. She tried her best to look as if she were bothered or annoyed, but Celestia knew her well enough to see that under the attitude was an embarrassed little filly.
The pair entered the bathroom quietly, Celestia’s hoofsteps echoing faintly. The soundproof spell was quickly applied, which impressed Twilight. She had felt the magic flow over her as it was applied to the whole room, and for the briefest of moments it was as if her senses had been muffled before returning to their natural state. The bathtub faucet flipped itself on with a burst of magic, setting it to the perfect temperature to relax in. Twilight looked down at the floor, wondering if she should get down as Celestia had come to a stop next to the bath.
“Stay right where you are,” Celestia commanded, her attention still focused on the bath. Twilight winced slightly as she attempted to relax. The sound of the water was increasing her apprehension about bathing with the Princess. Washing yourself was such a private and intimate activity, and while it was okay for a young filly to take a bath with her mentor having two adult mares share a bath was a bit… Overwhelming.
Lost in trying to force herself to relax, Twilight didn’t notice that Celestia’s magic had wrapped around her. She also didn’t notice herself being slowly lowered into a bathtub overflowing with bubbles. It wasn’t until the warm water splashed against her body that she jerked back to reality. “Wha—?” Abruptly, she was then submerged underwater as Celestia’s magic dropped her.
With a childish giggle, Celestia stepped into the tub and sat down near the side. She grabbed the confused purple lump of wet hair and pulled it up above the surface. Twilight sputtered and coughed as she cleared the water from her system. “Sorry, Twilight. I didn’t realize you had spaced out.”
“I’m okay,” the Countess replied, getting onto her hooves. For some reason, she had the impression that Celestia meant to do that. Musing to herself, she realized that the bath wasn’t all that deep now that she had recovered enough to operate her limbs. “I was just thinking about… Well, I wasn’t paying attention.” A blush quickly became visible on Twilight’s face.
A wise and knowing hmm was the only answer that Celestia gave, eyeing Twilight with a mischievous smirk. The princess lowered herself into the water, submerging herself in the bubbles save for her head. She moved behind Twilight and gave a happy sigh, stretching out.
Twilight was almost the opposite. She felt tense and awkward, sitting a good distance from Celestia. Her eyes were roaming around the bathroom, looking everywhere but at her bath partner. She could feel Celestia’s gaze pressing down on her like a heavy saddle during winter. “Twilight, why don’t you come sit next to me? I want to talk.”
Very nervously, Twilight moved closer to Celestia with trepidation and anxiety clear in her wading through the bath waters. “Sure… About what?”
“First off, relax. It’s just a bath.” Celestia pulled the nervous mare over so that they were sitting side by side. Casually and carefully, Celestia’s wing gently laid itself on Twilight’s back. She could feel how stiff and unrelaxed Twilight was. “Relax.”
Taking a few deep breaths, the Countess managed to calm down a little. Her body relaxed and she leaned gently into Celestia. “Very good, Twilight,” Celestia commented softly. “I wanted to talk to you about… Well, I suppose now I want to talk to you about your sudden change of heart. You had been so sure that your memories were real, and now you’re suddenly saying that it was all a dream. What changed?”
Twilight had been expecting this to happen, though she hadn’t been expecting it to happen in a bubble bath that would impress any foal who saw it. Twilight took a moment to gather her thoughts before speaking. “I guess it was always eating at me. All my theories about alternate worlds or parallel timelines were just too farfetched to be plausible, and I knew that from the start. Spending that day in the library to see just how impossible it was was enough to get me to face what I already knew.”
Before Celestia could reply, she pressed forward. “Something about being here feels… It feels right, if that makes any sense. I realized it last night as I sat there. This is my home, no matter what my memories say. Here in the palace, with you and Spike, is home.” She finally looked up to make eye contact with her former mentor.
Celestia had a soft smile on her face, and a sparkle in her eye that hadn’t been there before. “I wish I knew the right answer, but just like you I have to go with what I feel is right. I feel that you belong here as well, and even if it turns out that you aren’t my Twilight after all... You’ll take up the title as Countess of Canterlot and stay, then?”
Twilight nuzzled into Celestia neck. “Of course.”
“Then we better wash up, for the royal court is open today.”
Remembering a past conversation, something suddenly dawned on Twilight. She had two more important people she needed to talk to. “Actually, Celestia. After breakfast, I need to go out for a bit.”
A shampoo bottle floated over Twilight’s head and deposited a load of minty gel between her purple ears. Celestia sat upright and rubbed her hooves into the dark blue mane, a faint sound of amusement leaving the alicorn at seeing Twilight wince during her sudden ministrations. “Of course. I’ll have an escort ready for you.”
After a quick but delicious breakfast, Twilight found herself once more surrounded by guards as she left the palace. The busy streets quickly passed by without any pony getting in her way and swiftly gave way to the mostly empty residential streets. A somewhat familiar-looking house was their destination, though the street it was located on was wrong according to her dream memories. A golden 87 was attached to the royal white mailbox near the cobblestone pathway that led up to the porch.
One of the unicorn guards marched up the steps and knocked, Twilight following along just behind him. The rest of the guards scanned the street, keeping an eye out for any pony who might attempt to harm the Countess again. For the moment, it was silence. Whether a good sign or not remained to be seen. “Just a moment,” a familiar voice called out from inside the house. Twilight nervously shifted her weight from one side to another. The door opened just a few seconds later, revealing Twilight’s mother.
“Good morning, mom. Can I come in?” Twilight tried to give a warm smile.
Her mother was an expert at reading her expression, however, and could tell that something was going on. “Twilight! Of course sweetie, come on in.” She stepped back to allow her daughter inside. The guards quickly surrounded the house, letting the Countess have privacy with her family.
Twilight walked into the sitting room, looking around. “Is Dad still home? I’d like to talk with both of you if I can. I don’t have much time before court.”
“He’s in his study.” Her mother stuck her head around the corner of the hallway. Her parent’s home was laid out exactly as she remembered it. “Night Light! Twilight came to see us!”
“Sorry I didn’t give much notice, but it’s… Well… It’s important,” Twilight said as she took a seat on the sofa. It was the same sofa from her memories. She and Cadence would sit here when she was being foal sat. Cadence would read her books about all sorts of things, helping to expand her interests.
Her father came into the room, smiling. “Hey Twilight, what’s the occasion?”
She waited for her parents to sit down before speaking. “I’m afraid that Celestia and I weren’t… Fully truthful about my memory loss.”
“I knew she was hiding something from me,” her mother said suddenly, with a harsh tone accompanying the bitter words. “She’s trying to keep you away from us, isn’t she?”
Twilight blinked, surprised. “No! No, it’s nothing Celestia did.”
Night Light put a hoof on his wife’s back. “Honey, please. The Princess isn’t some evil tyrant trying to steal our daughter. Twilight, please continue.”
“Right. Well… It turns out that I have lost all my memories. Everything from before the coma is… gone, or suppressed. We’re going to attempt a spell to try and draw them back out, but there is a chance they are gone forever.” Her parents looked confused. She decided she might as well go all-in. “When I was in the coma, I guess I was having an extremely vivid dream. I can remember that dream perfectly. It was similar to my life, but there are a lot of differences. What I’m saying is… I’m no longer your Twilight. My memories don’t match what actually happened anymore…”
“What do you mean? How are your memories different?”
Tears started to form in Twilight’s eyes. They sounded so bewildered, so worried. Twilight thought about backing out, claiming faintness and not have to broach this topic ever again. But she stood her ground, and recollected. “Well… In my dream, Shining never died. In fact he married Princess Cadence, and became a Prince. I moved to Ponyville and took up a job being a librarian. And Celestia had a sister who tried to take over Equestria and I saved the day, became a national hero… It was just—” Suddenly, having to explain her situation to her parents was becoming increasingly more difficult as she swallowed a growing lump in her throat. “It was different than me becoming the Countess. I remember that dream, but I don’t remember any of this. I... I can’t remember reality.”
Her parents were also crying as they began to understand what she was telling them. Her father got up and seized her in a tight hug. She hugged him back, pressing her face to his neck as she cried. Her mother, on the other hoof, moved into rage that Twilight didn’t remember her having in the dream. “That… That… That foalish mule! If he weren’t dead, I’d kill him myself!” Twilight Velvet stormed out of the room, mumbling more and more vulgar and violent threats under her breath.
Twilight sniffled and pulled away from her father. A large crash of breaking glass sounded from the other room. Twilight winced, her ears laying flat. “Has mom always been that angry?”
“It’s gotten worse since you were attacked, but she’s always had the mean side…” His voice trailed off as the fact that she couldn’t remember her mother’s anger issues sunk in. He rapidly recovered, putting on a strong smile. “You should get back to the palace; you have court to attend to, young lady. Don’t worry about your mother, I’ll calm her down.”
“Thanks, dad.” She gave him another hug, with a quick kiss on the cheek, before heading for the door. Her hooves stopped moving before she fully left the sitting room. “Tell mom I love her no matter what I remember,” she called back to her father. He simply nodded. Twilight gave him a wave and walked out of the house.