//------------------------------// // Top Doggin' It Up // Story: Appledashery // by Just Essay //------------------------------// Ten seconds later, Iron Will's nose ring was still spinning like a top. At last, it came to a rattling stop across the cavern floor. Silence. The dust settled. Rainbow Dash twitched. She sat up from where she had flung her body onto the ground with wings spread. Her forelimbs were wrapped around Lancie, having dove on the statue and hugged it to her chest in a protective gesture. “Wow...” The statue sputtered. “Smells like rust and sweaty linens...” “I know.” Rainbow nodded, coughed, and waved some of the dust away from her muzzle. “Something must have exploded with that last impact.” “No, I was talking about your chest.” Lancie smirked. “What is it that makes pony fuzz so strangely fragrant?” “Ugh...” Rainbow rolled her eyes and stabbed Lancie upside down into the ground like a tent peg. She spun around. “Mr. Iron Will?” More silence. She trotted towards the cloudy mess on petite hooves. “Mr. Iron Will? Didja kill it? I mean... did you smash it up good enough for Top Dog to call it quits?” “NEVERRRRR!” There was a fierce slapping sound, and Iron Will's body flew past Rainbow Dash with a prolonged yelp. Thuddd! A mechanical arm dug into the earth just a few feet in front of the wincing pegasus. “The Big Bitchin' Bitch is never defeated!” The dust cloud dissipated in time for Rainbow to see the battered tank pulling itself upright. The top turret twitched all over with sparks, but it was still somehow operating. Inside the cockpit, the canine pilot wiped blood off his chin and grinned through the translucent metal webbing. “Not so long as I have pure unbridled chaos on my side!” Rainbow blinked. Her eyes darted towards the top of the turret. She saw the surprisingly fragile-looking glass canister that contained the glowing granite leg. “Thanks for the little hint, big boss!” She flapped her wings and soared towards the back of the mech. “You can kiss your chaotic power streak goodbye—” WHANGGG! A dormant drill slammed Rainbow in the side. “Not today!” Rainbow flew upwards and slumped over the railing of the catwalk. “Ooof!” She dangled there, wincing. “I am the lightning and the storm!” With a metallic clack-a-clacking, the drill opened up like an iron flower. “Also fire hydrants!” Inside the expanding drill, a sparkling rod extended like a deadling stinger. “Behold the might of not only Big Bitchin' Bitch! But Big Bitchin' Bitch Ray!” Vrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm! A voice sputtered from the floor. “Iron Will... kaff kaff... d-does not like the sound of that.” Rainbow Dash found herself staring down into a bright golden light. “Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh sh—” “Burn to a mangy pegasus crisp! But mostly die!” Top Dog flung a switch, and the sparkling rod discharged a solid beam of golden energy. Rainbow Dash kick-flipped off the railing and dove down. The laser instantly melted the catwalk, then carved a deep gash through the ceiling as it traced after Rainbow. Sweating, seething, Rainbow arced through the air. She glanced out her twitching peripheral to see the tank's turret spinning to match her movement. Within seconds, the golden beam would overtake her. Looking to her left, Rainbow spotted several large steam tanks. “Httt!” With a grunt, she backflipped and flew daringly in the opposite direction. The ends of her feathers curled as she barely skirted past the beam and its hotter-than-the-Sun energy. “Haah! So quick to give up?!” Top Dog jerked the controls so that the beam followed Rainbow. “You came to the right place, ponnnnny! I'm going to bury your bones so deep that not even the decay of time itself can unearth—” Rainbow hopped onto a tank, stood on it sideways, counted two seconds, and leapt off just as the beam struck. KAPOWWWWWWW! The steam tanks exploded, flooding that entire half of the cavern with red-hot mist and shrapnel. “BARK!” Top Dog reeled from the blow. His tank did the same. The B-Cubed tilted back, its tank treads forced off the ground. Then, in a metallic groan, it fell hard to the floor. WHUD! Through the spreading mists, Rainbow Dash dove, then perched on the side of the overturned craft. She gripped the glass canister that held the other shard of Lancie and pulled with all her might. “Come on... come on...” Rainbow strained and hissed. “Pop loose! You know want to! Just do it!” “Scrkkkk! Well well well... somepony wants my little secret!” “Nnngh!” Rainbow turned her head from what she was doing and spat. “Quit talking smack! I just owned you!” “Really, though. If the pony wants pure chaos so much...” Top Dog reached at his controls and pulled a switch. “She can have it!” Whirrrrrrrrr! The jar right beneath Rainbow Dash vibrated. “Huh?” She looked straight at it and immediately wished that she hadn't. With a blinding flash, the legpiece inside overloaded. She felt waves of hectic energy surging into her body, and she flew back as if from a kick to the gut. “Gaaaaaah!” The world spun. The mists split down the center. She heard the bellicose laughter of Top Dog whirling around her head. Then, when she struck the wall on the other side, there was a flash of light—verdant green with red speckled orchards—and all went dark.