Chapter 3 If Truth be Told
Over the next few days, the denizens of Ponyville seemed to go to the clinic and the pharmacy more often but talk less about it. The talk went underground and became gossip. Ponies confided in each other in back alleys, dusty barns and behind hay stacks, and the rumors spread. Ponyville had never seen so many embarrassed ponies sneaking off to the doctor and the pharmacist, wondering who would see and who knew what.
Spike was deeply troubled. He still didn´t know anything about his childhood, despite repeated sessions on the couch. He felt more socially awkward than ever and he had not talked to Rarity. In fact, she was nowhere to be seen these days. It was said that she had been diagnosed with GAD, Glittering Allure Disorder. She was probably at home trying to finish the costumes for the Brazilian Samba Fillies. They were performing on Saturday, and today was Thursday.
Spike went to the Sugar Cube Corner and ordered a milk shake. He sat down behind a big plant to be on his own and ponder the events of the last few days. On the other side of the plant another party sat down with cupcakes. It was Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. Usually, they would be eager to gulp down the delicious cupcakes, but now they sat brooding over them without eating.
“I talked to Pinkie Pie today,” Twilight Sparkle said finally. “She is all messed up. Keeps saying she has forced her parties on ponies for years. Blames all of us for not standing up to her and telling her to ease off. “
“But we have,” Rainbow Dash protested. “More than once. She just would never listen. But then again, we have always enjoyed her parties. Although she can be a bit annoying, she does have a knack for dragging people out of their shells. She won´t let people be depressed in peace, and that´s ultimately a good thing. Just look at Cranky Doodle and how his life changed!”
“I tried to tell her that. But now that Pinkie´s on medication, she looks at things in a different way. A non-Pinkie way. “
“A doctor Flimp way,” Flutter Shy mumbled. “He´s made us all doubt ourselves. I mean, he´s right of course, we probably should doubt ourselves, I should at least….”
“Oh, stop it!”
Rainbow Dash sounded angry. The thud from her lavender hoof hitting the table was loaded with frustration.
“Doctor Flimp this and doctor Flamp that! I didn´t want his advice, but he observed me at a distance anyway when I was training. Then he sent me a letter saying that I have Restless Wing Disease and that I probably needed Paracetamule of Coltein for pain and Stilknocked for sleeping. He also wrote that I seemed to be an over achiever that showed signs of a doping problem, had an unhealthy attitude towards competing and suffered from low self esteem that made me want to win everything to gain validation. Can you believe it?”
“I get a new diagnosis every time I see the doctor,” Flutter Shy said. “Now I have not only Sluggish Cockamamie Trifle but also social anxiety, generalized anxiety, specialized anxiety and AOA.”
“What´s that?”
“Any Old Anxiety. Only Zooloft and Ponyzepam can take the abbreviations out of that one.”
Twilight Sparkle rubbed her temples.
“We have to take this seriously. Diagnosing Derpy with DCD, Dead Cute Darling, is obviously based on correct observations. And they spotted Berry Punch´s drinking problem right away. So the doctors must be good at what they do. And after all, they have helped my family through some very dire circumstances.“
“Or so they say,” Rainbow snorted. “Have you ever heard any of the other princesses talk about them?”
“Maybe it´s just not the kind of thing you talk about.”
“What don´t you just talk about? Is it about my family again?”
Applejack had just entered. Spike peeked through the leaves of the plant. The caramel mare looked a bit gaunt and pale as she sat down with her friends.
“No, not at all!” Twilight answered, a little too quickly. “ Absolutely not! Why would it be?”
“Because that darned doctor fished something out of my head and no one will tell me what!”
“Have you been back to the doctor to ask him yourself?”
“Hell no. Once on that couch was enough. But I told Big Mac about it, and he went. Came back all pale and quieter than usual. Said he has SLI.”
“Specific Language Impairment?”
“No. Silly Learntotalk Inability. Needs a speech therapist. Not surprising, doctor Flimp has that degree too. Figures.”
They all nodded in silence. Spike finished his milkshake quietly and snuck out of the Sugar Cube Corner without being noticed. Maybe he would go to see Rarity again after all. This time, he knew exactly what he wanted to say to her.