91.1 (OathToOblivion)
"Pikachu?"
"Yeah, Ash?"
"Why am I a fire-less Rapidash?"
"...No clue."
Ash looked around the strange forest they were in. He and Pikachu had been through a lot of time resets, but this was the first time they'd ever been somewhere like this. "I wonder where we are?" he wondered as he went to move closer to Pikachu. Instead, he ended up tripping over his hooves, not being used to an equinoid body.
Pikachu facepawed. "How about you just stay here and get used to four legs while I go figure out where we are, alright?" he asked. At Ash's agreement, he scampered off through the forest. As he exited, he saw what appeared to be a cottage of some kind on the outskirts of the forest. As he ducked down to get closer, he froze when a voice chimed in from behind him.
"Oh my. I've never seen anything quite like you before." As Pikachu turned around, he saw what looked to him like a pastel-yellow colored Ponyta with a pink mane that also wasn't fiery. The one thing that threw him off were the pair of wings on it.
"{I've never seen a Ponyta like this before...}" he muttered to himself in Pokespeak. He was shocked to find that the pastel not-Ponyta that spoke human tongue could understand Pokespeak when she said...
"What's a Ponyta? Is that what you call Ponies? Well...to be more accurate, I'm a Pegasus, although I don't really like flying," she, and it was definitely a she, said. "I'm Fluttershy; what's your name?" she asked.
"...Pikachu," the electric mouse Pokemon said after a moment's pause. Unfortunately, since Pokespeak, for most Pokemon anyway, consists of a Pokemon speaking its name in different tones and stresses, it took him a while to make it clear to Fluttershy that he meant that his name was Pikachu. 'One of these days, we need to figure out something so we're not confused,' he thought to himself.
Anyway, just as he was about to say something else, a lavender not-Rapidash came onto the scene. "Hello, Fluttershy," she greeted. "Who's this?" she asked as she turned to him. Strangely, her eyes widened for a second before she looked as though it had never happened.
"Oh, Twilight," Fluttershy greeted. "I was just saying hello to my new friend. He says his name is Pikachu," she said.
Twilight had a pensive look for a second before saying, "Hey, Fluttershy? Do you mind if I talk to Pikachu here for a bit? I've been working on an Animal Translation Spell and I think I've gotten out all the bugs," she asked.
Fluttershy nodded. "Okay. I'll be inside if you need me; it's time to feed Angel Bunny," she added as she walked to her cottage and shut the door (softly) behind her.
Twilight then turned to Pikachu. "I guess Fluttershy isn't Awake if she didn't notice considering our visit there, but what's a Pikachu doing in Ponyville?" she couldn't help but wonder.
"That's what I'd like to know," interjected Pikachu, much to Twilight's shock. "Where am I? First time keeps resetting and not even Celebi or Dialga or even Arceus knows why, and now I'm in a place with pastel colored not-Ponytas and not-Rapidashes? What's going on?!" he wondered in frustration. He was getting fed up with trying to figure out what exactly was going on.
"A talking Pikachu?" Twilight wondered before the rest of what he said registered. "Wait; time has been resetting for you? You're a Looper?!" she asked in shock.
"Looper? What's that?" Pikachu asked in confusion.
"Okay...imagine that every single world out there were branches on a tree, and that tree is the multiverse," Twilight explained. "Now, imagine that something happened that almost broke the tree..."
Pikachu winced. "That sounds bad," he commented. "So if the tree that is the multiverse is broken, what's going on to fix it?" he asked.
"The Time Loops," Twilight bluntly said. "Looping stabilizes the Branches of the tree while repairs are made. But it's going to be several eternities before the tree is stabilized enough to even think about ending the Loops. The Admins, the quasi-divine upper-dimensional entities in charge of the universe, are working very hard just to keep things from getting worse."
Pikachu whistled. "Sounds daunting..." he commented before a scream from the Forest cut him off. Pikachu paled beneath his fur. "Oh crap! I left Ash in there alone while I went to scope the place out!" he yelled in horror. He quickly dashed off in a Quick Attack, cutting off what Twilight was going to say.
Ash tripped over his hooves as he tried to run away. He had no clue what was chasing him; it looked like someone had taken a Pyroar and fused it with a Bug-type of some kind. As he fell, the manticore, for that was what it was, got ever closer, causing him to scream for help.
Just as the manticore was about to do...something...a yellow blur came out of nowhere. It was Pikachu, who had channeled the speed of his Quick Attack into a Double Edge, knocking the manticore back a good few feet. "Ash! You alright?" Pikachu asked.
"P-Pikachu! ...Yeah, I'm fine," Ash said shakily. Pikachu then turned his attention to the manticore.
"Alright! Listen up, whatever you are! You've just made the biggest mistake of your life if you think you can go after Ash like that!" Pikachu declared. 'Wait...that sounded more like something Squirtle would say...oh well,'
The manticore growled before launching itself at Pikachu. Pikachu dodged, and immediately used Iron Tail to whack it in the stomach. But the manticore didn't give up, and let out a loud roar, that caused shockwaves in the air, knocking Pikachu backwards. The manticore then swooped in and attempted to stab Pikachu with its scorpion tail, but Pikachu performed a mid-air dodge and used Thunder Wave to paralyze the manticore. Just as he was about to launch into a Volt Tackle though...
"STTOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPP!!!" was heard as Fluttershy ran up. However, much to Pikachu's chagrin, she immediately turned on him. "You should be ashamed of yourself! Attacking Mr. Fluffykins like that out of nowhere...!"
Pikachu immediately started gibbering. "{But...But...Ash...in danger...weird thing...attacking...!}"
Ash then chimed in. "Um...it's alright, miss. Pikachu was just trying to protect me," he pointed out. Fluttershy deflated.
"Oh...well, the least you could do is apologize...I mean, if that's okay with you," she said.
Pikachu rolled his eyes, but he acquiesced when Ash gave him a look. "{Um...sorry, Mr. Fluffykins,}" he awkwardly said. The manticore growled before flying off deeper into the Everfree.
It was then that Twilight ran up. "I heard a scream; is everypony alright?" she asked, trying to deflect the Unawake Fluttershy from prying too far into this.
Ash then spoke up. "Um, we're fine, Miss..?"
Twilight realized then that they had never gotten her name. "Twilight Sparkle. I gotta say, I hope it didn't get too loopy for you guys this time," she not-so-subtly said.
Ash widened his eyes before nodding. "Ash Ketchum. Pikachu's my best friend," he said as Pikachu leaped up onto his back, since trying to do so on his shoulder would be problematic.
"Well then, Ash, Pikachu. Do you mind coming following me over to the town library? There are a couple of things I have to talk to you about," Twilight said. At the duo's agreement, they said goodbye to Fluttershy and walked with Twilight to the library.
91.2 (misterq)
The mist covered first the stage, and then the remainder of Ponyville's town hall.
Twilight Sparkle, expecting the usual 'night shall last forever' speech was surprised when the mist failed to dissipate in a timely manner. It remained thick and heavy in the atmosphere, still magical but with an almost familiar scent. The lavender unicorn only realized what it was when the ponies in the audience slowly stopped panicking and started acting more and more relaxed.
"Hello, to all my pony subjects. I do hope we're all feeling irie tonight," said the Jamarecan accented voice. The mist cleared enough that Twilight was able to recognize the alicorn in the center. She was still black and midnight blue, but her flowing mane and tail were styled in ephemeral dreadlocks. She had on a bright shirt, a rastafarian hat, and there was a guitar and a steel drum strapped to her sides.
Twilight Sparkle sighed as she put a hoof up to her temple to try to stave off the oncoming headache, "Let me guess. This time around, you're Nightmare Mon?"
91.3 (Masterweaver)
"Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee--"
Twilight lightly bopped Lyra upside the head. "Yes, you're human. Get over it."
"I don't think I recognize this loop," Cheerilee commented, looking around. "Is it just a typical high school or--"
Then the loop memories hit.
Lyra blinked. "....okay, us being secret super spies I can get," she said slowly. "But why do we wear spandex? And why does Twilight get the green one?"
Cheerilee shrugged. "Super-hero clothing, I guess. Wouldn't be surprised if there's some sort of tech involved..."
91.4 (Feral Wolfskin)
Vinyl wasn't that unfamiliar with the concept of an apprentice; she often had one or two for any given loop... but this, she was sure, was a first.
“So, Princess,” she began. “Why do you want to learn how to be a DJ?”
“To be honest, I have never looped as a DJ, at least not meanwhile I was Awake, and it always looked interesting to learn – but, due to the fact I am one of the rulers of the country, it is difficult to find time to do it.”
Vinyl blinked in confusion (No-one noticed, thanks to the sunglasses.) “But... aren't you one of the rulers this time, too?”
Luna grinned. “Not... exactly...”
Twilight looked through a few documents, then said, “It only took them thirty seconds since the start of the loop.”
“Wow, that must be a new record,” exclaimed Pinkie. “It looks that the Princesses really needed a vacation”
“Probably, but they should at least have checked who was awake before they pulled this,” grumbled Rainbow Dash pointing to the still stunned Applejack. And the unconscious forms of Rarity and Fluttershy.
91.5 (Masterweaver)
The shops of Canterlot had seen many a strange thing in their years, even before those in the know factored in the loops. It was, after all, a hub to Equestrian culture and, due to the presence of two important entities in world-wide maintenance, a number of other cultures as well.
Seeing two fillies bicker with an oddly lanky zombie insect pony over which dress was the most beautiful, though... that was a first to many minds.
"I'm telling you, the one on the left has elegance! Look at that filigree, those gems--"
"Of course you'd like the gems, Diamond. I'm thinking she should go for that one, it's not too complicated but the way the shoulders swoop--"
"Sweetie Belle, I am not going to wear swooping shoulders on my date with Trixie! Maybe if I'm playing up an evil sorceress thing, but--"
On the plus side, their argument was attracting a lot of attention to the shop and therefore generating retinue. The shopkeeper smiled a bit at their antics, totally unaware that they were two goddesses in potentia and the queen empress of the world's largest spy network. To him, they were just another group of shoppers in the big city.
Of course, later that week when they fought Discord off with a shapeshifting crystal mech that weaponized music, his opinion would change.
91.6 (Conceptulist)
“Too short, but on topic and well written,” said Cheerliee. “B- for Twist.”
Cheerliee was spending yet another day grading papers. A long and tedious job that she refused to try and shortcut with looping knowledge.
“Definite problems with spelling, and little to no indication any attempts to fix it. D+ for Featherweight.”
The only relief from this tedium was coming up with new assignments so she didn’t have to grade the same exact thing again and again.
“No major spelling or grammatical errors, and it was an enjoyable read. A for Dinky.”
It was boring being the only teacher in Ponyville, baring the occasional variant loop where that was not true. Sometimes it was frustrating to teach the same thing again and again. Sometimes she just wanted to quit and take a vacation from it all. Sometimes she did, if she could find a replacement teacher.
“Diamond Tiara’s and Silver Spoon’s epic adventure of awesome? A for creativity.”
But sometimes she saw what her student’s could learn to do. And she fell in love with teaching all over again.
"Grammar Mane to the rescue!" a spandex clad pony yelled, barging into what appeared to be an empty cave with several pieces of scientific equipment lying around. "Do not worry my friends. I shall save you from the evil Miss Spelling and her minion Typo!" Looking everything over, grammar mane was quick to spot the dreaded Miss Spelling. “Charge!” she both yelled and did.
"De apearatus has bean set," said the rival of Grammar Mane. "You'll nevar stahp me now!"
Grammar Mane’s charge towards Miss Spelling was screeched to a halt. “Ah! Bad spelling! My only weakness!” she screamed, before collapsing to the ground. “How did you know?”
“Like et is that hared to figure out,” quipped Miss Spelling. Grammar Mane twitched with every abused word she heard. “Let uce go ovar the facts.” More twitching from Grammar Mane ensued. “Farst, your name. Et is Grammar Mane. Ergo, you draw you’re strangth from correkt grammar.” Twitch-a twitch went the superhero. “Than yu allweighs avoided directly touching any of my pourly spell taunt notices. The one time you did, yuos got like thes.”
Grammar Mane looked around the room while Miss Spelling continued to pontificate. There was nothing she hadn’t seen when she when she entered the room. No projectors beaming projections of misspelled words. No Comma-inators to reduce her movements to a jerking halt. Not even a single Un-Correction drone. But somehow she was still being rendered completely helpless. Grammar Mane despaired, as she was completely at the mercy of Miss Spelling.
The only thing that was keeping Miss Spelling from finishing off Grammar Mane once and for all was Miss Spelling’s selectively shoddy memory. Miss Spelling always forgot whom she gave the “I know Grammar Mane’s weakness” speech to. This meant that, even if Grammar Mane herself was the one who asked, anyone asking about it was in for a long and detailed lecture explaining Grammar Mane’s allergy to poor grammar and bad spelling. And unfortunately for Grammar Mane, it sounded like Miss Spelling was no where near the end of the speech.
“… And fur item number sixtea two, you nevar make a mistake in you’re writing. Almast like yu haft to…”
‘No,’ thought Grammar Mane. ‘If she is only up to 62 and I have been reduced to a shuddering wreck already, I’ll never make it past 127. I’ll have to pony up and-’ here Grammar Mane was hit by a particularly bad series of tremors that interrupted her thought process and caused her too momentarily blackout.
As soon as Grammar Mane came to, she cut the rest of Miss Spelling’s rant off by yelling “How are you doing this!” This caused Miss Spelling to smirk evilly.
“You come all de way heir, and you had no idea what I waz building?” Miss Spelling rhetorically stated. With a vicious leer and widening of her evil smile, Miss Spelling rotated a dial on the control panel. “Wat a jok! Dis is fuknee. Oh sew vary funie. In fect, I tink ill jucet stert laghin now.” Miss Spelling took a deep breath, and began to laugh maniacally.
“BWEHAHIHUHOHAHEHAHEOHIEHIAHEIHUHAHAHIAHHEHEHEHAAHAHAHEHAHEHEHA~”
As the pain started to increase and Miss Spelling’s cruel laughter echoed in her ears, Grammar Mane came to a realization. ‘Of course!’ she thought. ‘But I shall need some supplies from my utility belt. I must prepare while Miss Spelling is still distracted.’
“~HIAHAHAHIHEHEHEHAAHAHAHEHEIHUHEHAHEOHIEHA!” laughed the maniacal mare. Gasping for breath, Miss Spelling took a few short moments to rest. She soon was at Grammar Mane’s side, ready to continue the taunting of her heroic arch-nemesis. “Ded yiu fogiro et iot yut?”
“Of course I figured it out,” answered Grammar Mane. “You used the stockpile of magitech equipment you stole to build a device that lets you misspell your spoken words.”
“End new thet yu knew, I wall finesh yu!” Miss Spelling taunted, as she prepared to turn her machine up to eleven. Her hoof was moments away from making contact with the dial when a large rock slamming into the back of her head interrupted her. Staggering in a dazed fashion, Miss Spelling turned around in time to see a spandex-clad hoof right before it impacted her face.
As soon as Miss Spelling could focus her eyes well enough to see, she realized that Grammar Mane was proudly standing on top of a large pile of scrap. “NOOO! The Vocal-Miss-Spell-inator 9001 was my penultimate creation! You should still be a gibbering mess on the floor. You should be dead by now. Where did you find the strength to fight back!?!”
“I have no idea,” said Grammar Mane, before stopping to take some cleansing breaths.
A twitch developed in Miss Spelling’s eye. “Impossible! My machine was flawless! There is no way you could have-”
“What you just said,” continued Grammar Mane. “I can’t hear a thing. Aren’t earplugs just grand?” With a broad smile, Grammar Mane clapped a pair of hoofcuffs onto her gibbering arch-rival.
As Cheerliee finished reading, she began to snicker to herself. “I just have to give writing assignments like this more often. I’m amazed at what the UnAwake CMC can come up with when properly motivated. A+.”
91.7: (Zetrein)
999, Moonless age. What Would Captain Jack Sparrow Do?
Cadance stood in Canterlot's throne room, trying to convince Nyx's parents that she really did have their daughter's best interests in mind.
"...And I really, really have no idea how she got wings!" This was punctuated by a gesture behind her, to where Nyx lounged on the throne with a strawberry milkshake. "This whole 'Luna reborn' thing just happened after that! I've been trying to shut that down, but it's already been spreading."
"Um." Lyra raised her hoof. "That, might be my fault. When Cadance told us about her plans, I uh, I remembered that I overheard Twilight talking to Nyx last year, about hiding the fact she was an alicorn." Tugging at her collar, as the entire room turned its attention to her, Lyra continued. "So, um, I thought, if one alicorn could claim the throne, two would make a better claim?"
"Twilight knew about this?" Twilight Velvet turned her attention to her younger daughter. "Nyx, why didn't you ever tell us? How- When did this even happen?"
As Nyx looked downcast at Velvet's hurt tone, Nightlight spoke up in her defence. "Now dear, don't blame Nyx, I know what happened." Making an odd gesture with his hooves, he smiled as his wild mane seemed to twitch. "Moonponies."
Though correct in ways he didn't know, his argument fell flat. Any counter arguments, however, were cut off by a loud banging on the throne room doors. As the guards and Mooncultists turned to face the doors, on the third bang, they came crashing off their hinges.
Standing in the now open doorway, was Twilight Sparkle. She had a crown on her head, a large sledgehammer hanging in her magic to her right, and a cowed Flash Sentry held to her left. Flanking her, was a group of ponies that some present recognized from Ponyville.
"Cadance! In accordance with the charter for the Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns chapter of the Cult of the Moon, I must inform you that this is a coup!" Twilight declared, setting the sledge's head on the floor, and posing with one hoof on the handle.
"This is the part where she defeats you." Cadance could just hear Nyx say from the throne.
"This is the part where I defeat you." Twilight continued to ham it up across the room.
"With magic." Nyx said, taking a sip of her milkshake.
"With Magic!" By now, the bystanders were quickly clearing a path between Twilight and Cadance.
"Eh heh. Um. Parley?" Cadance asked, as Nyx hopped off the throne to get clear.
1000th year of The Exodus. Heading off to Iskandar.
Eternal night all around it, the Moon shone in the sun, as it sailed towards its homeworld. At the bow, the mighty shield produced by the Prow shimmered as it deflected space dust. On the side of the Prow, a pair of Lunar Navy marines stood watch on a balcony.
"Hey." The maroon batpony cought the attention of his fellow gaurd.
"Yeah?" The orange earthpony replied.
"You ever wonder why we're here?"
"It's one of life's great mysteries, isn't it? Why are we here? Are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really a Yggdrasil? Watching everything; you know, with a plan for us and stuff? I don't know colt, but it keeps me up at night."
As he finished speaking, the maroon pony could only stare at his friend. Following an akward silence, he finally replied. "What? I meant why are we out here?"
"Oh, I... yeah." It was the orange one's turn to stand akwardly.
"What was all that stuff about Yggdrasil?"
"Uh, hm? Nothing"
"You wanna talk about it?"
"No."
Taking the hint, the maroon one switched back to his original topic. "Seriously though, why are we out here? What's the point? What could we possibly see coming, that the sensors wouldn't? Who could get close enough to the Prow to do anything to it, assuming they got through the armor and force fields?"
CLANG
The orange one's reply was cut off by the entire shield flashing with color, and a resounding noise that everypony on the Moon must have heard.
"What the buck was that?!" They both cried.
Ruby Pinch was a good filly. She helped Mom around the bar, made sure she got up when she got back from school, so she'd open on time, and often helped cooking dinner.
So when everything went CLANG, she did what any responsible filly would do, and started looking around to make sure nothing broke. After making sure her groaning mother was okay on the floor, she started looking through the rest of the apartment they had, above the bar.
Cadance came to on her back. There was a hole in the ceiling above her, going clear through the second floor to the sky. It was night, wherever she was, but oddly enough the sun shone through the windows to her left. There was a filly looking at her through the hole. She had a rosy coloured coat, and the most adorable tufts on her ears.
They stared at each other for a moment, before the filly ran off, little bat wings flapping. As Cadance's thought train was derailed by the bat wings, she heard the filly shout from somewhere above her.
"Mommy! Somepony broke into the bar! And there's a big hole in the roof!"
Silence reigned, in the aftermath of the fight. There was a hole in the ceiling, Cadance was gone, and somewhere along the way Twilight had grown a pair of wings, just like her sister.
"Now then," Twilight addressed the room, "Unless there are any complaints, I will now assume command of the Cult."
Various versions of "No, Ma'am." echoed from the places the Cultists had taken cover in. Lyra poked her head out from the guardpony she was hiding under.
"If I may, Supreme Cult Leader, do you have any orders? Um, the baguette wasn't our idea!" Lyra ducked back under the guard, as Twilight turned her attention towards her.
"Well for starters, I'd like to know what happened to Princess Celestia." Twilight looked around the room, waiting for an answer.
Her answer, instead, came from behind her. A familiar voice, though it hadn't been heard in Equestria in a thousand years echoed through the door. "Hard to port!"
As they all looked towards the door, the more familiar voice of Princess Celestia replied, with repressed laughter. "Where's the port?"
As they entered view, they said together, "We drank the port!"
Luna, wearing a double breasted navy blue longcoat, and Celestia's crown, poked the guardpony walking beside them, as they laughed. "Port's a kind of wine, y'see."
Celestia, wearing a plumed bicorn that matched Luna's coat, stopped short, looking at the room she was about to enter. Beginning with the doors, she looked across the various ponies poking their heads out of hiding places, Twilight and Nyx's wings, what she recognized as the Elements of Harmony, and the hole in her roof, finally ending at the sledgehammer embedded in her throne.
Blinking owlishly, she asked her little ponies, "Did we miss something?"
91.8 (Indalecio)
They found Catscratch on the outskirts of town. A purple pony with long black hair. Her cutie mark was a grinning cat's face. She stood in front of a chorus of mice with a microphone planted in front of them. Most unusually, she wore a plush mouse on her head.
Kagura walked up to her. "Hey Catscratch."
Catscratch nodded. Then she nodded to her mice, which seemingly took the gesture as their cue to take five. As the mice wandered off, Kagura struggled to form words.
"Why are you wearing that?" she finally managed to squeak out.
"Solidarity." Was her one word reply.
Again struggling to find the words, she suddenly brightened and turned around to the rest of the group.
"I want you to meet some ponies." She waved the rest of the group to come.
"The rest you know, but this is Chiyo and Spike."
"Pleased to meet you." Said Chiyo as she gave a short bow.
Catscratch nodded.
Tomo ribbed Chiyo in the side and whispered. "Ask her!"
"About what?" Was Chiyo's confused response.
"About if she wants a human name."
"Oh! We wanted to know if you wanted a human name. Its a fad going around right now?"
Catscratch nodded.
"Okay, how about Sakaki?"
There was the faintest of blushes from Sakaki, and she nodded again.
"What! Come on! You too? Everypony likes their human names just like that?"
"Hush!" Said Yomi, bopping her friend on the head.
Spike coughed and spoke suddenly. "Anyway, we're representatives of Princess Celestia, checking on the preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration. So you prepared singing mice?"
Catscratch nodded again and tapped her foot. The mice reassembled and scampered on stage. At another gesture from Sakaki, they started singing what could only be described as an upbeat melody, followed by a few others.
Everypony stamped their hooves in appreciation. Tomo, however, had the question.
"I know you like cats Catscratch, so why did you choose mice?"
"Cats can't sing very well." Said Catscratch plainly, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
91.9 (Dalxein)
"So, Ditzy, I was wondering if you were Awake?" Twilight asked, as nonchalantly as possible.
The mailmare stopped in her letter sorting and gave the anchor an odd look. "Of course I'm awake, Twilight." Her head tilted in an absurdly unsettling way. "I'm always awake."
Twlilight clicked her tongue. "Yeah, not what I meant." Honestly, how many nightmare-fueled versions of her bright-eyed friend existed in the multiverse? "I was wondering if you were experiencing the same period of time over and over, in a loop."
"Oh." And suddenly Ditzy was just Ditzy again. "Well no, but that does sound interesting. I'm sorry if I can't help because I'm not, Twilight."
Aaaand sad Ditzy makes the world cry. Best head this off at the pass. "Oh no, I was actually hoping you weren't so you could help me with an experiment. The next time you're Awake, I'm going to ask you if you remember 'the experiment' and if you remember this, I want you to answer yes and tell me everything you can remember of this conversation, okay?"
She scratched her chin. "That sounds really weird, but I'll try!" And with that she went back to work.
Twilight nodded to herself as she went back to check on her other projects. One of these days she'd pin down the specifics of these different 'Dreaming Bugs'.
(Gym Quirk)
From the Journal of Sunset Shimmer:
Well, this is interesting, if more than a little unsettling...
I appear to be Major Kira Shimsun, Bajoran liason to the Federation starbase designated Deep Space Ninie.
Ranma-sensei and Harry told me about these loops: The native loopers are so good at not showing their status that nopony knows for sure just who is and who isn't Awake. The supposition is that the main characters for each series have to be looping, but without proof...
I might as well be alone in the universe.
I wonder if this is how Twilight feels when she's anchoring a lonely loop.
No. Looping or not, these are real people, and I shouldn't hold myself aloof just because I may never see them again after the loop ends. After all, I'm probably going to spend several years here unless something really strange happens.
Anyway, after a bit of a rocky start with Commander Sisko, we seem to be settling into something that might evolve into a decent working relationship.
Chief O'brien is a solid friendly sort.
Dr. Bashir, while clearly a skilled physician, is a bit of a twit.
I could probably get to like Jadzia Dax, but that whole symbiote thing creeps me out.
I'm not sure, but I think Odo may have a crush on me.
That Quark character reminds me of Snips, but craftier and nowhere as sycophantic.
Idle thought: I wonder how my keyblade would interact with that wormhole...
Since this is a tech-heavy, low-magic loop, I'll take the opportunity to get a handle on advanced science and engineering.
Addendum:
New loop, but there was something about the end of my tenure on DS9.
The day after Sisko's final journey to Bajor, I found an anonymous text message in my personal account.
"We apologize for not being more supportive during your visit. We appreciate your contributions, and under different circumstances, would welcome your company at any time."
I don't think I was especially friendly, but I guess I was able to mesh pretty well with the station inhabitants after all.
Anyway, I need to talk to Harry Dresden about those two murders. More about this loop later.
91.10 (Bigou)
Macintosh was setting up his bar for the loop when Discord brutally entered, almost tearing the door from it's hinges. The chaotic being walked to the counter, so pissed that each of his steps was imprinted in the floor.
"Give me the blandest and dullest drink you got!"
The scene happening in front of him terrified the red stallion so much that he was unable to even comprehend what was expected of him, or even that something was expected of him. So he stared open-mouthed.
Faced by the lack of drink, the spirit bellowed "WATER! GIVE ME A GLASS OF WATER!"
Freed from is paralysis, but still trembling, Big Mac delivered the requested drink, then ducked under the counter.
As soon as Discord's paw touched his glass, his head exploded in a loud "BOOM!" that will have made Trixie proud.
The bartender timidly pocked an eye out of hiding. Beside tiny bits of draconnequus head plastered everywhere, the bar wasn't suffering and damage.
"D-do ya want ta sp-speak o-of it?"
Discord snapped his talon, making him whole again.
"No, I don't. But I need to talk about it! Say Big Guy, have you ever wondered what Equestria would be if it was inhabited by draconnequii instead of ponies? And be honest, please."
The red bartender reflected on the question, lightly taping his chin. "Nope. But now that ya ask…"
"I used to, before my last loop. ʻIn the wonderful land of Draconnequat, every draconnequii lived in chaotic harmony, bla-bla-bla!ʼ At first glance that variant of Equestria seems like a paradise tailor-made for good old me, don't you think?"
"Er… Yup?" Was Mac's unconvinced reply.
"It might have been, if I didn't Awaken as the only pony. No scratch that, If it was only a species problem it wouldn't have been a problem. Awakening as Check List, the spirit of order and disharmony… And by order, I mean excessive order!"
The apple farmer was able to think on only one appropriate reply: "Ouch!" So that's exactly what he said.
"I hate to admit it, but without Twilight's help, I probably would have lost my sanity…"
At that last statement, Big Mac preferred to stay mute.
91.11 (FanOfMostEverything)
Twilight Awoke to chaos. A flock of waffles flapped through a key lime sky. Clods of earth and of social ineptitude drifted past her, untethered by gravity or etiquette. A fully grown dragon cartwheeled across the edge of her vision.
She took this all in before saying, "I was wondering when this would come up. Okay, Ditzy, let's… huh."
Only then did Twilight realize she hadn't Awoken while casting any kind of defense against the madness, and she immediately saw why. Her immediate surroundings were as gray and lifeless as a Discorded Cheese Sandwich. Looking closer, she saw some variety in the ground cover — grass, playing cards, four-dimensional seashells — but it was uniform in color and motionlessness. "Well, this is interesting. What are you doing?"
Ditzy looked at the golden glow playing along her horn. "Right now, I'm just maintaining whatever this is. Still getting my Loop memories. What's going on, exactly?"
"This happens whenever an adult pony becomes an alicorn. We have a Loop where we take Celestia and Luna's place. We have to defeat Discord, rebuild Equestria, and so forth."
Ditzy swallowed. "Oh. Um. Well, I guess I'll have you helping me." She perked up as her memories hit. "Oh, that's clever! Okay, so Discord generates chaos, but it's high-energy chaos. I used my entropy powers to force right here to a lower energy state, so it's more stable."
"Interesting." Twilight mulled this over for a bit. "Do you think it'll do much good against Discord himself?" She winced as her own memories hit. "Okay, wow. Never mind. I don't think you want your name eaten again. Let's just go get the Elements." She threw up her own chaos shield and trotted in the direction of the Tree of Harmony, this part of the Loop well-practiced. "Which ones do you want?"
"Um, whichever ones you don't."
Twilight paused and looked back. Ditzy offered a weak smile, but her nervousness was clear in her fidgeting wings and twitching tail. Twilight walked back and spread a wing over the younger Looper's withers. "It'll be okay, Ditzy. I've done this before. This is the easiest part, and I'll be right there with you."
"Sorry. It's just…" Ditzy waved a hoof across the madhouse reality.
"Yeah, it's a lot to take in." Twilight started moving again, and Ditzy followed her. "So, going by that one variant where Trixie and I switch lives, you're a shoe-in for Kindness, and you should definitely get Laughter, because you make about as much sense as Pinkie Pie. What else?"
Ditzy screwed up her muzzle in thought. "Well, you get Magic, of course. And taking Generosity seems kind of silly. 'Gimme that, I'm generous!'"
"Ditzy, you're one of the most selfless ponies I know."
"Sure, you can say that, but I can't."
"You do realize that the more you insist I take the Element of Generosity, the more you convince me you should have it, right?"
"I just don't want to disqualify myself, is all."
Twilight shook her head, but smiled. Ditzy barely even seemed to notice the madness around her. "It doesn't work that way."
"Sure, you say that now…"
Ditzy considered the Elements in her magical grasp. "Didn't that Link pony have a bunch of these?"
Twilight rolled her eyes. "Just be glad they aren't necklaces. This usually looks ridiculous."
"Excuse me, Mr. Discord?"
Discord, Master of All He Feels Like, Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony, Who Makes Brave Sapients Call For Their Brown Pants, looked up from his throne. "Can I help you?" He smirked as she saw his supplicant. "Well, what do you know? I think I actually can help you. Put that ludicrous idea of rebellion out of your silly horned head."
Ditzy returned the most gormless expression she could muster. "I thought you liked ludicrous ideas."
"Only when I have them, dear." Discord ran a leonine finger down the alicorn's cheek. Then, when there was no sign of desaturation, he frowned. "I'm not even sure if that worked. Is that ginger ale nebula of yours usually that shade?"
Ditzy considered her effervescing mane and shrugged.
"Well, aren't you helpful? I suppose a taste test will settle matters." Discord produced a tap and stuck it into the ephemeral hairdo.
It popped, as did the alicorn attached to it.
"Now!"
The resulting statue had a much more befuddled expression than in the baseline.
Twilight took a deep breath. "Okay, this is where it starts getting tricky. We need to decide how we're going to divide the diarchy. And every time, the other alicorn has gone Nightmarish."
"Oh, that's why you wanted me to think of my evil self earlier." Ditzy chuckled. "I thought that was just for stress relief or something."
Twilight grimaced. "Not a good idea. Remind to tell you why it took me so long to discover Big Mac was Looping. Anyway, division of labor. Your thoughts?"
Ditzy pondered this for a time. "Okay, so Luna went bad because nopony was awake. What if we each got half of the day and half of the night?"
"Huh. That could work." Twilight considered it. "Switch off at the zeniths? Noon and midnight? Though it'd mean a weird activity cycle for both of us."
Ditzy drooped a little. "Bad idea, then?"
"Oh, I never said that. I'm willing to try it if you are."
Amazingly enough, the system was working for once. Ditzy's midnight-to-noon shift meant she saw relatively little activity, but still enough to build some ruling experience. Better yet, she showed none of the expected warning signs: her bubbly personality never went flat, she didn't take on the entire post office's workload, and she never tried to subsidize muffins into a nationwide staple.
Twilight was grateful for this, as she had enough problems as it was.
Ditzy may have been staying sane, but she was still Ditzy. She simply didn't have much experience with two-thirds of her magic, which meant that the castle was subject to catastrophic miscasts, wall-toppling faceplants, and the occasional ruinous maelstrom for variety. Thunderclouds were now outlawed within a mile of the palace.
It wasn't like Ditzy made the same mistake every time. There was no teacher like experience, and no experience like bringing a palisade down around one's ears. She got the hang of sunrise and moonset quickly, but her magic kept finding new and exciting ways of going horribly wrong, and always at the worst possible times. Twilight couldn't help but think of her forays into computer programming; one misplaced parenthesis and the east wing was reduced to rubble.
Worst was how, more often or not, the mishap rendered the rubble resistant to reconstruction magic. That meant resorting to manual labor, and that came with other costs.
One day, Twilight found she had to do something drastic. She confronted her co-sovereign at lunch. (Well, lunch for their subjects, breakfast for her, and dinner for Ditzy.) "Ditzy, I've run the numbers."
"About what?"
Twilight heaved a heavy sigh. "It'll actually be cheaper to build a new, less destructible castle than repair this one again, but either way, that's all we can afford. One more disaster in the next forty years, and Equestria will officially be owned by carpenters and masons."
"Oh." Ditzy's gaze dropped to the floor, on average. "I guess I'm getting banished to the moon until the economy recovers?"
"I don't think we need to do something that drastic... though you will be spending a lot of time on the moon."
"Uh huh." The hope drained out of Ditzy's voice. "So, what will you call it? Abeyance? Dormancy? Quiescence?" She gave a humorless little chuckle. "I like quiescence. It has a nice flow to it."
Twilight crossed the table and wrapped her wings around the other princess. "Nothing like that, Ditzy. I was thinking… Have you ever had a Dragonball Loop?"
A little light came back to Ditzy's eyes. "I Woke up on planet Vegeta as a naturally blonde Saiyan, including the fur on my tail. They'd been all but worshipping me." She let out a giggle. "It was really awkward. I was saving it for the next time we were all together in Mac's bar."
"Well, think off this as a training journey. You can go to the moon, make a few new craters, and fine-tune your alicorn magic. I'll check in regularly. How's every year sound? We can even make a holiday out of it."
Ditzy considered this for a time. "Space it out a bit more. There's a lot of bad stuff out there still, and whatever you'd name the holiday, they'd call it Invasion Day. Make it every twenty."
"Twenty years is a long time. I don't want to have to actually banish you because you went mad from the isolation."
Ditzy septupled. "I think I'll be okay," they chorused. Ditzy reunited herself and gave a genuine smile. "Besides, that way, you can introduce me to a new personal student each time. I know you love taking them on."
Twilight giggled a little. "It's a deal."
The announcement was made by both diarchs, standing together as co-rulers and sisters. All but the most outlandish rumors of a coup died then and there.
On the next day's sunset, Princess Ditzy of the Wee Hours and the Morning spoke to her subjects for the last time in generations:
"My little ponies, know that I love you all, and that I will keep watch over you even as I learn all the ways my power can go wrong. With one eye, I will watch my sister guide you with wisdom and grace, and I will watch you grow and flourish, love and learn, rise like bubbles on the breeze and never pop. With the other, I will watch those who think you weak and foalish. I will watch them fail time and again, succumbing to their own inner strife and your inner strength. And if they would claim a moment of fleeting triumph, if by some ill fate they would overpower you with brute force and hatred, then I will launch myself from the moon and strike them down like a falling star.
"Be strong, my ponies. Shed no tears. I will be back among you soon, and so I say not goodbye, but farewell."
Twilight began the transition from day to night. As the moon rose, a bubble of Ditzy's magic enveloped her and streaked toward the satellite. Some wept despite her entreaties. Some cheered and stamped the ground for the future. Twilight did both.
Twenty years later, a heliotrope flash placed two ponies and an atmosphere pocket on the moon. One, a white, pale-gold-maned filly on the cusp of marehood, looked around with naked astonishment. "She must be so lonely."
Twilight smiled. "I'm very proud of you, Wondrous. I had been wondering what you would do first when we arrived."
Wondrous Item returned a smaller, more embarrassed smile. "You expected me to go straight to gathering samples, didn't you?"
The princess bobbed her head from side to side noncommittally. "I wouldn't have been surprised. And you are, of course, welcome to collect some moon dust for your studies." She lit her horn and swept it about before locking onto the familiar magical signature. "She's close. Remember to stay near me. The air pocket only extends so far."
The two trotted over the regolith, a snowshoe enchantment keeping them from sinking in. Well, Twilight trotted. Wondrous Item delighted in the lower gravity, pronking like a party pony. The princess had to pull her student back from the edge of the air pocket a few times, but she couldn't bring herself to scold her student for feeling the joy of discovery.
Soon enough, they came to a surreal structure. Wondrous Item would've seen it as an affront to royal dignity had a royal not made it. Twilight immediately recognized it as a replica of Ditzy's house in Ponyville made from compressed moon dust. She stopped well away from it.
Wondrous landed next to her. "Is something wrong, Princess Twilight?"
"Not exactly. I just don't want the air to disrupt anything my sister prepared that might rely on its absence." Twilight sent out a ping. Wondrous Item was rather like she was at that age, and she didn't need to melt the poor filly's mind by transmitting sound through a vacuum.
The answering ping was almost simultaneous, but came from above. Ditzy dove into the air pocket, went into a tailspin, and briefly popped out of existence.
Item boggled. "Uh…"
"Give her a moment," Twilight said with a giggle. "Oh, she hasn't done this in years."
Ditzy reconstituted facing them and smiling sheepishly. "Sorry, Twilight. Little out of practice with atmosphere flying." She noticed the stunned filly. "Oh, you must be Wondrous Item!"
Hearing her name shook Item out of her reverie. She bowed to the grey alicorn. "It is an honor to meet you, Your Highness."
Ditzy smirked at Twilight. Twilight returned it. "I know, I know. I try, but she insists, and I can't very well order her to stop revering us."
This got a laugh. "Rise, my little pony. You don't need to stand on ceremony when you're standing on the moon."
Wondrous bolted upright so fast she got about a foot of height. "Y-yes, Your Highness," she sputtered as she drifted back to the ground.
Twilight smiled in earnest. Not just the enigmatic monarch/mentor grin she'd perfected through countless Loops, but a big toothy grin. "So, how's it going, Ditzy?"
"Eh, still exploring all the ways my talents come together." She tilted her head at the immense crater that astronomers had dubbed the Primum Niti after it formed near the beginning of her self-imposed exile. "Turns out entropy plus carbonation plus drawing circles makes something you can probably see from Equestria."
Twilight nodded. "They make your cutie mark."
"They do?" Ditzy burst into laughter, rolling in the dust for the better part of a minute. When she managed to compose herself, she panted, "Oh my gosh, that's fantastic! I knew there were seven of them, but…" She collapsed back into giggles.
Twilight nudged a mortified Wondrous Item with a wing. "It's like I keep telling you. We may be old, we may be powerful, but Ditzy and I are still just ponies."
"I… suppose," Wondrous managed, still staring.
Ditzy managed to collect herself enough to stand up again. "Okay. Okay, I'm good." She snorted. "The Bubbles in the Moon! No, no, really, I'm good. I can be serious. This is my serious face." The dour expression was a bit spoiled by her still-twitching mouth.
Twilight crossed her pinions as she came to the reason for the visit. "So, do you feel ready to come back home?"
The last hints of hilarity drained out of Ditzy, and suddenly she really was wearing her serious face. She leaned in close and whispered, "Twilight, do you know how many times you asked me about my special talent?"
Twilight paled. Up until Lyra had accidentally the universe, that question had been an all-too-precious bit of randomness in the Loops' eternal monotony. "More than I care to count."
Ditzy nodded. "Offhoof, I can think of about twenty. Now consider all the times you didn't."
"Mother of larch…"
"Yeah. I don't remember all of them, but I remember quite a few. You never told me about that Loop where I could shoot lasers out my eyes. I'm not coming back until I'm sure that I can manage everything safely."
Twilight bit her lip, but nodded. "I understand." She leaned back,. With a sad smile and a a normal volume, she asked, "See you in twenty?"
"See you in twenty." Ditzy tousled Wondrous's mane. "It was very nice to meet you, Wondrous Item. I hope I'll see you again."
Wondrous risked eye contact as best she could. When she wasn't reduced to dust, she returned the smile. "As do I, Your Highness."
Ditzy stepped out of the air pocket, and the others returned to the planet.
About an hour later, a glass vial and a written request for moon dust appeared at Ditzy's front step.
Twilight visited Ditzy three more times, with three more students. Each time, the answer was the same. By the fourth time, she'd been expecting it. Now, twenty more years after that, she was dreading Ditzy's response.
Runestone, her current student, couldn't help but notice the little twitches of ear, wing, and tail. "You seem nervous, Princess."
"It's nothing, Rune. Just a silly superstition."
Twilight let the colt consider what kinds of superstitions a princess might have as they made their way to Ditzy's home. It hadn't changed much in eighty years. Most notable were the sculptures scattered about the grounds. Two rows of them were dearly familiar to Twilight. One was her past students, to which a statue of Runestone would be added if this didn't work out. The other had many more ponies, and stranger creatures besides. She paused before them, reminiscing a bit.
"Hello again, Twilight."
She hadn't even heard the other alicorn. "Hi, Ditzy."
Quietly, "Is there a reason your student looks like a younger version of your dad?"
"Genetic lottery. Sometimes it picks the same numbers twice." Twilight licked her lips. She couldn't bear to put this off any longer. "Are you familiar with narrativium?"
"It's the stuff that makes one-in-a-million chances crop up nine times out of ten, right?"
"Among other things. Equestria almost never has as much as the Discworld, but it still loves measuring royal exiles in powers of ten. It's been a century, Ditzy. If you're not ready now, there's a decent chance you won't be for the next nine."
Ditzy wingshrugged. "Par for the course, then."
Twilight drooped. "You're not ready, then."
"Oh, I never said that."
Twilight faced the other princess just in time to see her wink. This got a laugh, a shove, and a declaration of "You're horrible!"
Ditzy delivered a terribly dignified raspberry.
"Then…" Both alicorns faced Runestone, who cringed at the royal attention. "Er, that is, then Princess Ditzy will be returning with us?"
"Returning, nothing. I'll take us back myself!" Ditzy put deeds to words, and a burst of golden magic enveloped the trio.
When it faded, Twilight was still on the moon. "Huh. At least it's me and not Rune." She cast a teleport of her own.
Nothing happened.
Ditzy knew Canterlot had been founded shortly after she left for the moon, but she wasn't too certain of the altitude. As such, she targeted the same balcony where she said her goodbyes a century before. Pop in, take a nice, leisurely flight to catch up with Twilight and get to know Runestone. It sounded nice.
Instead, as when she left, she was greeted by a cheering throng of ponies… but this time they were all clad in ashen robes and gold foil eyepatches.
"Runestone?"
He swallowed. Her tone was eerily similar to Princess Twilight's when she was inexpressibly angry. "Yes, Your Highness?"
"Is this a fashion trend of some sort?"
"Only among the derpocalypse cults, Your Highness."
Ditzy's muzzle scrunched in genuine confusion. "The what now?"
"Behold!" An elderly unicorn at the front of the crowd, her robe further accented in gold, creakily reared up and spread her forelegs. "The Seer of Destruction has returned!"
"Runestone." And she was back to unspoken fury.
Still, he had faith she would not unleash it on him. "Yes, Your Highness?"
"Why is Wondrous Item the leader of a cult worshipping me?"
"According to Princess Twilight, you made quite the impression on her. The derpocalypse cults believe you to be the embodiment of apocalypse in both meanings at once, a being of revelatory catastrophe and catastrophic revelation. Your sister has been trying to stamp them out, but with one of her former students leading them, they know her tactics well."
"You seem awfully calm about this," Ditzy noted.
"I cannot influence this scenario in any significant way." Runestone's monotone spoke of either incredible detachment or terror so great it had briefly overwhelmed his capacity for emotion. "Either the cult is wrong and you will disabuse them of such notions, or, unlikely as it seems, the cult is right, and I shall join your crazed supplicants in short order."
"Yeah, you're Twilight's student alright. I just can't believe she is." Ditzy lifted off the stage, rocketed up several hundred feet, and drifted to the ground as she remembered that flying in atmosphere required much less magic.
Still, the flub-up seemed to cow the crowd nicely. They bowed their heads and dropped to their bellies as she landed. She sighed. "Wondrous Item, what is all this?"
The old mare frowned as she adjusted her mouth out of the dirt. "Are You not pleased, Milady? I thought it best to only bring the most devout, but our numbers are far greater than what You see before You."
Ditzy facehoofed. She could hear the capital letters. "Oh, for the love of photosynthesis. Get up! Get up, all of you!" The cultists sprang to their hooves. "Wondrous, where did you get such a ridiculous…" She trailed off.
Wondrous Item faced her, but still avoided eye contact. She couldn't help it, her eyes drifting in their sockets like unmoored ships. "I… When You enlightened me, Milady, I thought I understood. In my dreams, I saw You. Before the Thing of Chaos, before Your blessed ascension, even then, I bore witness to Your love, Your serenity, Your ruinous might." Tears began to flow. "I thought I understood. How have I displeased you, Milady? How have I failed you?"
Ditzy thought back. Eighty years ago, what had she been working on just before Twilight arrived? The answer came, and her own tears followed. "Oh, Wondrous." Ditzy wrapped her wings around the old mare. "It was I who failed you." Mind reading. Flank eyes. That one she'd never figured out that just seemed to throw other ponies' eyes out of synch. There must have been some kind of lingering effect, some kind of mental contagion that had transmitted some of Ditzy's memories.
"No, Milady. I refuse to believe such heresy, even from Your mouth."
Ditzy nibbled her lip. What would Twilight do? Actually, where was Twilight, anyway? She released the hug. "Wondrous, do you know why Twilight hasn't returned with me?"
Item frowned. "Did You not bestow Your great and terrible blessing upon her, as You did with the Flowerpot, the Anvil, and the Wagon?"
As if in response, a scroll popped into existence next to Ditzy. The fuchsia flash left no doubt as to who sent it. "Well," she said, unrolling it, "let's find out.
"Dear Ditzy,
"Firstly, if you're reading this out loud, stop now. Oh." She continued silently:
You left the moon saturated in an aura of alicorn magic. Excepting you, the field is alicorn-impermeable, and it's interfering with Star Swirl's last spell. Normally, with you gone, it would dissipate itself, but I seem to be reinforcing it. Given the number and variety of effects you were using, it's going to take me some time to unravel this. Given what I'm doing to it passively, trying to cut the Gordian Knot is only going to make it worse.
I'm not sure when I'll get back, but when we do, we're definitely going to have a talk about proper arcane sanitation.
That said, I'm sure the country's in good hooves. Feel free to ask me for advice if you need it.
See you… eventually,
Twilight
"Okay, then." Ditzy rerolled the scroll, her expression neutral. "Well. It appears I accidentally banished Twilight to the moon."
Wondrous Item considered this. She beamed as she came to a decision. "Praise the Seer!"
"Praise the Seer!" echoed throughout the courtyard.
Ditzy rolled her eyes. "Yes, yes, praise me. I'm going to have to find something useful for you ponies to do…"
"And that's how I formed the Wonder Guard."
"Huh." Sunset Shimmer shrugged. "Eh, makes as much sense as what everypony's told me about their ruling Loops. So, I take it Twilight's finally figured it out?"
Ditzy nodded. "I got the letter this morning. She was right. Equestria likes having a princess banished for a nice, round thousand years. It just wasn't the same princess the whole time."
Sunset tensed. "Think she'll be mad?"
"Nah, she says it was the best puzzle she ever figured out, and that's including the time she was Professor Layton. But she does want the return party in Ponyville. Somepony's got to make sure everything's ready, and it's an excuse to get you there. You in?"
"Are Celestia and Luna there?"
Ditzy nodded. "Sunflower farmer and overnight deliverymare. And Celestia's Awake."
Sunset smiled. "I'm in."
91.12(OathToOblivion)
"...And here's the host of Jeopardy! Alex Trebek!"
"Thank you, Johnny. And I must say, ladies and gentlemen, that this is one of the strangest rounds of Jeopardy! I've ever hosted," commented the aforementioned Trebek. "I mean, we have here a unicorn, a Pokemon, and a lawyer competing today. Not exactly your usual crowd. Oh, no offense meant," he apologized.
"Don't worry about it, Alex," Twilight Sparkle said amiably.
"I'll be honest; I didn't expect this either," Phoenix Wright admitted.
"...Why am I even here?" Mewtwo wondered. "I don't even know what this show is!" he complained.
"...Actually, neither do I," Twilight admitted.
"Seriously?" Phoenix asked in disbelief. "You of all people don't know what Jeopardy! is?"
Twilight blushed. "I may have been a bit distracted last time I was here..." she admitted.
"Okay then, guess it's up to me to explain," Phoenix mumbled before launching into an explanation. "Jeopardy! is a Quiz show where we compete for a cash prize. There are 6 categories with 5 questions each, with each question in a category getting progressively harder as you go along. One of the questions is a Daily Double, where you can bet up to all of your current score to try to answer one super hard question."
"Couldn't have put it better myself," Alex said, causing Phoenix to remember that he was there.
"Oh...sorry about that, Alex," he apologized. But he just waved the apology off.
"Don't worry about it. Now, these are the categories in today's round," he said, waving to the board. The categories lit up on the board. They were the following: Magic is Friendship, Objection!, I choose you!, Move Tutoring, History of Law, Genetics.
"...Those seem oddly tailor-made for this group," Mewtwo pointed out.
"They were the idea of this game's sponsor," Alex replied.
"Who's that?" Twilight wondered, just as a platform came down from the ceiling, revealing a familiar pig-tailed martial artist.
"RANMA?!" both of the other two present Anchors cried out in shock. Mewtwo was just confused; Pikachu had neglected to tell him about the O7.
The Original Anchor grinned in response. "Thought I'd make things more interesting," he said. "Don't mind me; just get on with the show!" he added as his platform retracted into the roof.
"Alright, so which of you will start first? ...How about you, Mewtwo?" Mr. Trebek asked.
Mewtwo started before looking at the board. "Um...Move Tutoring for $200?" he hesitantly asked.
"Alright, now here's the question:..."