//------------------------------// // Conversations and Other Pressing Engagements // Story: The Royal Ponyville Orchestra // by Distaff Pope //------------------------------//         As Vinyl is so keen to remind me, spending all day writing in no way helps my recent diagnosis of carpal tunnel syndrome, and so she has convinced me to start greatly abridging the events of my day and only going into detail when I get to something that strikes me as either particularly important or particularly interesting. Considering just how intolerable the pain in my hoof can be at times, I am very much inclined to agree with her, and I hope any theoretical reader (Still probably Vinyl) will forgive me this break in format. I mention all of this because Thursday, while incredibly pleasant was also quite uneventful, and so I feel no need to detail the minutiae of every conversation and instead will be broadly summarizing.         It started quite pleasantly with Vinyl spending a few minutes in the hot tub watching the sunrise after I, in her words, “nagged her out of bed.” While Vinyl admitted the scene was indeed quite lovely, she also said that anypony who would willingly wake up at this hour was absolutely insane before going back to sleep, giving me plenty of time to practice my cello in the parlor (I’m still not sure just how many rooms our suite has). When she finally did get back up, we met with Lyra and Bon-Bon for lunch, and the three of us combined managed to convince Vinyl to eat something that wasn’t an oatburger, hayburger, or some version of fries. Gourmands around the world rejoice.         After that, we spent a majority of our day on the pool deck, me reading from one of my books while the other three splashed around in the water. Eventually, I gave into their pleadings and spent some time swimming with them. It was fun enough, I suppose, but given the choice I would much prefer reading and basking in the light of the sun as opposed to making a complete fool of myself in front of others. Then again, everypony in the pool was making a complete fool of themselves, so I doubt they would care if I acted like a foal, but the whole thing reminded me of my most recent episode and the few memories I have of terrorizing foals in the fillie pool kept my flank firmly rooted in my seat for most of the day. Finally, we met at the piano bar Ebony & Ivory to listen to one of the piano duels while Vinyl made sure I abstained from drinking (Not that I needed any help on that front).         If only I had more days like this.         The next day started off as uneventfully as the day before. Vinyl and I spent some time looking around the ship and seeing all the various amenities they had to offer, with the spa in particular catching my attention. She quickly agreed that a spa day sounded enjoyable (It is possible she agreed just to humor me), and we made an appointment for two at two, before going on to spend time touring the Arboretum (How the ship manages to have a greenhouse, I have no idea). It was lovely of course, and I found myself particularly fascinated by the flora of the recently rediscovered Crystal Empire. The trunks of the trees were made of rose quartz and the leaves were made from ultra-thin sheets of jade. Biology in Equestria is a strange and confusing wondrous thing.         After our tour of the ship, it was time for us to meet Lyra and Bon-Bon in the cafe for lunch, or more accurately, it was time to meet Bon-Bon in the cafe for lunch.         “Where’s Lyra?” I asked as I took my seat.         “In the library,” Bon-Bon said with a small sigh, “Did you know that this ship library has it’s own mythology section?”         “Ah,” I said, “Well then I suppose I know what she is looking up.”         Bon-Bon nodded, “Right now she is on a big kick about the Crystal Empire. She is absolutely convinced that-”         She was cut off as Lyra bounded into the room. “Guess what!”         “You found some new and obscure lore on humans,” I said, not even bothering to look up from the menu.         “Nope! Although…” She trailed off for several seconds before shaking her head, “Nevermind, not important. What is important is that while I was sitting in the library, I got to talking with this stallion, and apparently he is one of the big event coordinators on the ship. Anyways, they are kind of scrambling right now, because the DJ they hired for the party on Rainbow Road (What the collection of nightclubs and bars was called due to the their tendency to be named after colors) got sick after eating a bad oatburger yesterday.”         I have no comment on the fact that the only reason Vinyl wasn’t similarly afflicted was due to my attempt at culturing her. Gloating is so very undignified.         “Well anyways,” Lyra continued, “I mentioned to him that I am friends with DJ-P0N3 and that she is currently on board this ship, and then he says he is willing to pay 16,000 bits if she could play on such short notice. You just have to be there to help set up at and stuff at 1:45.”         “Wow,” Vinyl said after a few seconds of silence, “Tavi, can I please cancel our spa day to go do the DJ thing and make enough cash for a dozen spa days.”         “Of course,” I said, “We can move our reservations to tomorrow, I will be fine watching you perform in a club. In fact, I don’t think I’ve managed to see any of your shows without having a life-threatening emergency or mental break down.”         “Wait, no, that won’t work,” Vinyl said, chewing her cheek in thought, “I can’t let you out of my sight, and I definitely won’t be able to hear you while I am playing… Huh, I guess I will just tell them I can’t do it.”         “Vinyl,” I said as calmly as I could, “It’s 16,000 bits, you absolutely have to do it.”         “And I also said that I wouldn’t leave you alone, and I certainly won’t be leaving you alone unsupervised in a bar… or bars, I guess.”         “You make it sound like I am a foal, incapable of being left alone for even a second,” I snapped, frowning slightly. I knew her reasoning, and even agreed with her, but still rebelled at the idea of forcing Vinyl to nanny me all the time.         “It’s just…” She sighed, “If anything bad happens, it will be my fault, and as cool as it would be to make 16,000 bits it would be even cooler if you didn’t have another episode.”         We both looked at each other for a few seconds, trying to come up with a suitable solution before Bon-Bon spoke up. “Vinyl, would you be okay if one of us spent time with Octavia while you did your show.”         “I suppose,” she said, after much thought and some chewing on her lip, “But if you two have something planned-”         Bon-Bon shook her head, “Lyra plans to comb through the on-ship library as opposed to spending time enjoying the ship, so I really didn’t have that many plans for the day.”         “Well,” I said, finally feeling the need to enter the conversation my friend and marefriend were having about me, “Bon-Bon and I can go to the spa today, and then you and I can go some time when we get back to Ponyville. Assuming Ponyville has a spa of course.”         The three of them nodded, and I turned to Vinyl, kissing her on the cheek. “Would you be okay if Bon-Bon and I spent some time together today?” I turned to Bon-Bon, suddenly becoming aware of the fact that I was doing the same thing to her that she and Vinyl had unintentionally done to me, “The same question goes for you of course. I probably should have asked you first in fact.”         “Yeah, that’s fine,” Vinyl said, turning to Bon-Bon, “Assuming that sounds good to you, I mean. Like Tavi was saying, I don’t want to presume or anything. Just keep an eye on Tavi, if she starts freaking out or hyperventilating get her to me as quickly as possible, and Tavi-”         “I will be fine,” I said, “Honestly, after the last few weeks it is hard for me to imagine myself being phased by anything short of… Well, I suppose the saying ‘the return of Discord’ is nowhere near as meaningful as it used to be, but I can’t think of another that has the appropriate weight.”         “Ooh!” Lyra said, perking her head up, “The sundering of the firmament.”         “Let’s go with that,” I said, “Anyways Vinyl, I will be at a spa, I can’t think of a place that would be more relaxing.”         Bon-Bon smiled, “A spa day sounds lovely, and you know, Octavia, I don’t think the two of us have really spent that much time together.”         “You know what, I think you’re right,” I said, “Let’s call it a mares day out.”         “Uhmm… Tavi, we’re all mares here, pretty much anything we do that is outside of our house would count as a mares day out.”         I pursed my lips, trying to think of just how I had made such a blindingly obvious mistake. “How silly of me,” I said, after a brief pause, “Let’s call it an earth ponies day out then. Either way, I think it will be quite enjoyable.”         After that, the four of us spent some time enjoying our lunch and discussing all of our plans for the day and the remainder of the cruise. It seemed like it had only just started and we were already over halfway through it. How the time flies, especially when one is black-out drunk/passed out for an entire day. Eventually the four of us finished our meals and prepared to head our separate ways, Vinyl to Rainbow Road, Lyra to the library, and Bon-Bon and I went off to the spa. “So,” I said as we entered the spa, “How has your vacation been?”         “It is good,” she said, “Although with how busy the last few days have been, I really haven’t had a chance to-”         “Hello, do you have an appointment?” The mare behind the desk asked. It was the same mare we made our appointment with.         “Yes, we have a two o’clock appointment,” I said, masking my irritation, “It is under the name Octavia.”         “Ohhhhh,” she said after a pause, “I didn’t recognize you without the mare with the blue hair. What happened to her?”         “She had a pressing engagement so I brought a friend instead. That’s not a problem is it?”         “No, no, no, of course not, it just confused me is all,” she said, laughing like a hyena, “Please, go inside and put on your robes. Just to confirm, you ordered the ultra-deluxe package, right?”         I nodded.         “Thank you very much, please enjoy your stay,” she said, pulling back the curtain for us.         “I’m sorry,” I said, turning my head towards Bon-Bon as we walked into a room with two robes laid out for us, “What were you saying?”         “Oh,” she said as we worked to put on our robes, “It’s just with how busy things have been the last few days, it never felt like the right moment to propose to Lyra, and now she is so focused on her research on this Crystal Empire connection I don’t think she would notice if I did.”         I found myself laughing at the idea, “You know, we have an absolutely incredible stateroom, perhaps the two of you could come over to spend some time with us, soak in the jacuzzi, admire the view, and then propose when Vinyl and I step out so I can show her something in the parlor.”         “You have a parlor?” She asked as we were directed towards the sauna.         “Bon-Bon,” I said, “Our stateroom has everything. It has a parlor, a reading room, some rooms I haven’t explored yet. It might even be bigger than our house.”         She tapped her chin in thought as I opened the door to the sauna. “That could work, I would have to hide the hoofband box in there beforehoof.”         “We can do that after we are done here,” I said, following her into the sauna. “Then we can meet with Lyra and nopony will be any the wiser.”         “Thanks,” she said as we settled into our seats and felt the heat sap the energy from us. For the longest time, nopony talked. Occasionally, I would add a few drops of water to the coals over the fire. As we sat and let the heat draw the sweat and worry from our bodies, my mind chewed on a worry that had been building in the back of my head the last few days, it wasn’t major, not yet at least, but as I stared at the ground, I caught a glimpse of the pink stripe in my tail and remembered my promise to be more open about my feelings. Even if doing so might lead to us breakin the end the dissolution of my relationship with Vinyl. If I didn’t address them properly, I would more than likely wind up assaulting some mare who earned my ire during the next few days or doing something else that would definitely doom my relationship with Vinyl. My mind ran in circles, arguing for and against speaking up simultaneously, until I looked up from the floorboards and saw the cream-colored mare sitting across from me who had been in a stable, loving relationship for years. My attentions immediately turned to how I could best bring up the issue without upsetting her, and I spent some time trying to plan out just how I would broach the subject.         The mudbath was next, and I found it’s placement directly after the sauna to be counter-intuitive, but then, I’m not a professional spa designer, so perhaps there is some unknown merit to this arrangement that escapes me at the moment. Or perhaps it just didn’t matter as we were sent to the jacuzzi after the mudbath anyways.         It was in the jacuzzi that I finally found both the energy and courage to ask Bon-Bon for relationship advice. While there was some conversation in the mudbath, it was of a genial and unimportant nature, and I feel no desire to transcribe all the little pleasantries we discussed.         “Bon-Bon,”I said, tentatively, “Can I ask you a rather personal question?”         “Sure, just as long as I can ask you the same question afterwards,” she said, slowly turning to face me.         “Well,” I said, “What drew you to Lyra, the two of you seem like-”         “Polar opposites?” She said, sparing me from possibly committing a minor faux pas.         I nodded at her. “If you don’t want to answer that is completely fine, I am just wanting to understand how you two managed to make a relationship between two completely different ponies work.”         She smiled, “I think I understand, and I suppose the biggest thing is that we both offer something the other lacks. Lyra is funny and adventurous and a lot smarter than you might suspect, and thanks to her, every day is an adventure. Meanwhile, I like to think that I provide a bit of support and stability she might otherwise lack,” Bon-Bon laughed, “Apparently when she was with Vinyl, they would stay up for nights on end and get so involved in their own private worlds they would frequently forget to eat, at least, that is what she told me.”         “So,” I said, meditating on her words while the jacuzzi continued to drain me of tension, “You provide stability and she provides the adventure? That’s how you balance each other?”         “I suppose,” she said, frowning slightly, “But that is a rather mechanical way of thinking of things. We all have strengths and weaknesses, and if we are lucky, we will find somepony who compliments them. Now it’s your turn.”         I closed my eyes, determined to beat down the familiar tide of worry rising inside. “Right,” I said, staring down at the water, “That’s… that’s what I’ve been having trouble with. I know what Vinyl brings to the relationship, but I can’t figure out what my own strengths are. We’re both musically talented, but she can actually create music while I just work off of rote memorization and practice, she’s been the only thing keeping me half sane the past few days, and she’s still somehow more outgoing than I am. Not to mention the fact that she’s better educated. The only thing I can do that she can’t is play the cello flawlessly.”         Bon-Bon frowned, “Sweetie drop, do you know what Vinyl was like before you came to Ponyville?”         “From what I’ve gathered, she was impulsive and fun loving.”         “Impulsive is about right,” she said, “She did whatever she wanted with absolutely no regard for the consequences. One week she would stay inside her house tinkering with her fusion project, the next she would take a train to Canterlot and play at a club until she was physically incapable. She got… a bit better before you showed up, she stopped spending several days at a nightclub, but her schedule was still erratic at the best of times. Your coming to Ponyville has brought out the absolute best in her, but that’s all I am going to say. You really should discuss this with her though.”         “But what if…” I paused, doubt still eating at my mind, “You’re right, I should. Let’s just hope things don’t end disastrously.”         “I promise they won’t,” she said, “And if they do, I will let you stay in our room for the rest of the trip.         “Correction,” I said as I slowly got out of the jacuzzi, “You will let Vinyl stay in your room for the rest of the trip, although… Wait, I suppose neither of those options are viable since Vinyl is supposed to stay in ear shot of me at all times.”         She smiled as she followed me out, “Then I guess things just can’t end terribly. Trust me on this, you really do bring out the best in her.”         After that, our conversations meandered through a variety of topics, and Bon-Bon detailed all the adventures she went on with Lyra that led her all across the width of Equestria. To hear her describe it, her unexpected sojourns were quite pleasant, though I can’t imagine any time spent in the Frozen Wastes could be that appealing, nor do I imagine taking unexpected leaves of absence helped her with her confectionary business. Then again, Ponyville is not a town I would associate with order or any sort of sane schedule, so perhaps leaving for a month at the drop of the hat is standard there.         Bon-Bon next informed me of all the little rumours circulating in Ponyville and abroad, and we both enjoyed being pampered for a few more hours. She really does make a lovely contrast for Lyra, being stable and practical as opposed to Lyra’s eccentricity and volatility, but like she said, they balance each other.         We then went about preparing for Bon-Bon’s surprise engagement, getting the hoofband from the bottom of her saddlebag, storing it safely in our bar, and going to meet Lyra at the library. She was still studying, and the space around her was flooded with notes describing a variety of obscure and presumably non-existent connections between humans and ponies.         “Hey,” Lyra said, not bothering to look up from her readings, “How was your spa day? Was it fun? I bet it was fun.”         “Oh, it was great,” Bon-Bon said, sitting next to her marefriend and soon to be fiance, “It was nice finally having a chance to talk with Octavia one-on-one, and the fact that there was a spa involved was a nice bonus.”         “Ooh,” Lyra said, “Did you say stuff about me? Was it good stuff? Please don’t tell me you mentioned the time when I-”         She was cut off as Bon-Bon kissed her on the cheek, “We only talked about how wonderful you are, dear.”         “Huh, that makes sense,” Lyra said, finally closing her books, “I am pretty wonderful and stuff. Anyways, lets go see Vinyl rock the cruise ship.”         Lyra spent a few more minutes organizing all of her papers and storing them in her saddlebags before we headed off. She was surprisingly meticulous when it came to sorting and storing her anthropology notes.         “Hey Bonnie,” she said as we headed towards Rainbow Road, “Do you think we should get some cocktails or-”         She stopped speaking and suddenly glanced over at my direction. “Juice, we should definitely have juice. Obviously… why would we even want alcohol? Who would drink that.”         “It’s alright,” I said as we found an area of Rainbow Road to sit at, “You can drink as much as you want, I just can’t because it interferes with my medication.”         “Oh, right, I know that,” Lyra said, still backpedaling with all her might, “I just think… What if seeing us drinking alcohol and having fun makes you wish that you were having fun.”         “Believe me,” I said as we joined a gathering crowd of ponies, “After my experience four nights ago, I don’t think I will ever associate alcohol with fun again.”         “Alright,” she said, “I am going to go get our usuals. Do you just want water Tavi?”         “Seltzer water with lemon if they have it,” I said.         Lyra screwed her face up in disgust, “Really? I didn’t know ponies actually drank that straight.”         “I don’t,” I said, “I drink it with a lemon slice.”         “But it’s so disgus-”         She stopped talking as Bon-Bon flashed her a look, that I consider myself rather fortunate not to have seen in full. “Right, seltzer water with lemon, that is totally cool. Even if literally any other drink in Equestria would taste better,” she said as she headed off towards the bar.         Bon-Bon cleared her throat after a few seconds, “I feel like I should apologize for Lyra, she has… sometimes she gets so wrapped up in what she thinks, she forgets other ponies have valid opinions as well. I get why of course, no matter how well researched her theories are, every scholarly publication has sent back a very unkind rejection letter. The only reason she perseveres with her studies is because she can be so bullheaded that she ignores her detractors. Sometimes, that instinct comes out when it’s not needed though.”         I nodded my head in thought, “That makes a surprising amount of sense, did you ever try to convince her that humans aren’t real?”         “All the time,” she said laughing, “At least, when she first started her research I did. Now I’m… You’re going to make fun of me for saying this, but she’s convinced me enough to be open to the possibility at least.”         “However did she do that?” I asked, letting out a mock gasp.         “Research,” she said, “Finding all the little details in Equestrian life that didn’t quite make sense, pointing out how many items in Equestria just don’t work unless they were designed by humans, and pointing out all the species in the world that had humanoid characteristics. She had an absolute field day when Iron Will (No idea what that is) came to town.”         She put a hoof up before I could respond, “I’m not saying that I am a die hard believer in humans, but if they showed up, I wouldn’t be too terribly surprised.”         “I suppose that’s fair,” I said after a long pause, “I admit that I have my own personal issues when it comes to humans. Whenever I hear of something that doesn’t strike me as proper, I tend to dismiss it out of hoof. I’m working to fix that now, but it’s difficult.”         “Understandable,” she said, “And for what it’s worth, I think you are improving. You’ve started dating a DJ, you’re getting out under your parent’s shadow, and I can see that you are really working not to judge Lyra for her peculiar interests. Why, you were the only pony in our group who was willing to talk to Trixie and have her explain herself. Thanks for that, by the way, it turns out she isn’t as terrible as the town originally thought.”         “You’re welcome,” I said as I saw Lyra returning with our drinks, “Do you mind if I take a seat towards the back of the…” I struggled to come up with an accurate word to describe the concert venue, “Road? I would prefer it if I didn’t have my eardrums blown out when Vinyl started playing.”         “Oh!” Lyra said as she passed us our drinks, “Thanks for reminding me.” Her horn glowed three times and I felt the tell-tale tickle of magical energy in my ears.         “Do you mind telling me what you just did?” I asked, taking a sip of my seltzer water.         “Right, it’s a sound dampening spell so our hearing won’t be damaged by her performance AND it’s a kind of sound amplification spell so the three of us will be able to hear each other perfectly.”         “That’s… Remind me to bring you with me the next time I go to one of Vinyl’s shows.”         “Or I can just cast it before you leave,” she said cheerfully, “It’s one of the spells I crafted for my doctoral project on music magic before I decided I should try to get a doctorate in something important, like proving the existence of humans.”         I paused, trying to process the recent revelation, “Are you… saying that you could have gotten a Ph.D in… What were you going for again?”         “Well, my big project was to craft a spell that could allow ponies to go to a concert or club without risking hearing loss AND still be able to talk to each other without disturbing ponies who were focusing on the show. I crafted the spell but abandoned the project in favor of anthropological research before I could work the enchantment into a building.”         “Pardon me for saying this,” I said as calmly as I could, “But are you out of your mind?” I paused, trying to collect my thoughts, “I understand that you love your research on humans, and for what it’s worth I think you might, MIGHT, be on to something, but why would you abandon such a useful project? Couldn’t you have gotten your Ph.D and then started your research on humans.”         “Well… yeah,” she said, looking at the floor and frowning, her ears drooping while the look on her face made me feel like I had just told a foal there was no Santa Claus and that because her parents had died in a tragic carriage accident she shouldn’t be expecting any gifts this year, “But I wanted to do something important, something that changed the way ponies thought of the world. To not only know that there were worlds beyond ours with intelligent life, but also know that we had been visited by them in our ancient past. I…” She sniffled, “This just felt so much more important than noise cancellation/amplification spell.”         “Hey,” Bon-Bon said, nuzzling her marefriend’s cheek, “Your work is important. Think of all the progress you have made in the last few years. Yes your noise cancellation spell would have been wonderful, but if you want to pursue anthropology for your Ph.D then you should. It’s better to have the doctorate you want than do something just for a doctorate.”         “She is right,” I said slowly, “I was just surprised that you were going for a Ph.D at all, and the fact that you were so close to earning one before abandoning your work in favor of a less certain avenue of research surprised me. Forgive my rudeness, it was not my intent to upset you.”         Her ears immediately perked back up and a smile returned to her face, “It’s alright, I get told I am crazy all the time, and it doesn’t really faze me anymore, but the choice to abandon my musical spellcrafting in favor of anthropological research was a bit of a toughie, and I guess you made me doubt some of my decisions there for a bit. Thanks for encouraging me to keep up my hard work Bonnie,” she facing her marefriend and planting a kiss on her cheek.         Bon-Bon smiled wanly, “Of course dear. I am happy to help.”         The three of us watched as the stage crew continued to raise the towers of loudspeakers higher and higher until they eventually reached the ceiling, at which point they went to work constructing another tower. By the time they were finished, there were eight columns of speakers next to the stage as well as the myriad of speakers (amps?) surrounding Vinyl’s turntable. Around nine, the lights dimmed and Vinyl took the stage, now clearly in her DJ-P0N3 ponysona.         “Are you ponies ready to party?” She said, her voice amplified by a thousand speakers. Around us, ponies cheered enthusiastically.         “What’s that? DJ-P0N3 can’t hear you.” I am still surprised she didn’t realize Trixie was using a stage persona considering the fact that she has the exact same schtick. The crowd was substantially louder this time.         Vinyl levitated several vinyls to her turntable and the speakers blasted out whatever song she had put on. “Then let’s… drop the bass.” Suddenly the speakers blared with an absolutely awful cacophony and the ponies in the audience began to dance.         I’ve already described my thoughts on Vinyl’s performances previously, but this time she moved like a mare possessed, the light reflecting off her goggles with a fiery intensity. Most importantly, where her previous performances had ebbed and flowed allowing ponies to catch their breath, each song she played now was louder and more aggressive than it’s predecessor.         “What’s going on?” I asked after some time, “This doesn’t seem like her usual style.”         Lyra nodded, “She used to play like this when she was just starting out, but for the last few years she has been pretty good about not acoustically assaulting the audience, except… Hey, Tavi, do you think Vinyl might be upset about something?”         “I’m not sure, she could still be harboring some resentment about my actions a few days ago, but if so she’s done a splendid job hiding it.”         “That would explain it,” Bon-Bon said, “Vinyl uses her music as a sort of way to work through her emotions and when she starts to play, all of that shapes her music. So if she was angry about something a few days ago, that will bleed into what songs she chooses to play.”         “So… what you’re saying is that until she has had time to express herself through music all that anger will just be festering in the back of her mind even if she doesn’t feel angry anymore?”         “Yeah, don’t you do the same thing?” Lyra asked/shouted over the music. Despite her spell, the music was beginning to drown us out.         “I suppose my musical preferences do tend to reflect my emotional state and but I’ve never gone this loud before.”         “Well duh,” Lyra said, “You’re a cellist. Vinyl is a DJ. Her calm and soothing is probably louder than you playing in a blind rage.”         “I don’t actually play in a blind rage, even if I am absolutely livid when I start playing, a few minutes with my cello tends to calm me down.”         “That’s my point! Now imagine you played to excite a pony’s passions, what do you think would happen if you took the stage and were just mildly annoyed about something? Vinyl’s first really successful performance happened when she was livid about being bumped to opener. Since then she has put all of her emotions into her music, and right now she’s processing all that anger from when you got drunk a few days ago.”         “So what does that me-” I started to ask before Vinyl spoke, her voice filling the entire venue. “Alright party ponies, it’s time to tell your friends that you saw DJ-P0N3 perform her signature move. It’s time to experience… the double bass drop.”         I had enough time to see Lyra and Bon-Bon plug their ears and follow suit before a shockwave knocked everypony in the crowd off their hooves and caused the lights and windows to shatter before the speakers finally sputtered into silence.         When I regained my senses some seconds later, the place was pitch black and ponies were beginning to panic while I tried to assess the situation. For the first time in days, the floor wasn’t vibrating at all, which could only mean-         “The power’s out!” Somepony screamed as I reached the same conclusion, “That crazy mare overloaded the generators.”         “We’re all gonna crash!”         “I’m too young to die!”         “Oh Celestia, if I ever get out of this I’ll never go to a concert again.”         While we weren’t in any danger yet, a herd of panicked ponies could quickly make a bad situation worse, especially when they turned their attentions towards Vinyl. As if on cue, I heard a voice in the crowd yelling that if they were going down then the DJ should hit the ground first. For anypony reading this, there are two things in life you should never mix, drugs and alcohol and stupidity and anger.         “Lyra,” I said trying to hide my panic, “Would you please cast a voice amplification spell on me?”         She didn’t say anything, but I immediately felt the tingle of magic around my throat. “Alright everypony,” I said as authoritatively as I could, “Be quiet and sit down.”         Almost immediately, the room grew quieter and I took the opportunity to continue. “First of all, this is a rigid airship. Even IF the generators are off, we are in no danger of crashing. At worst we will just float through the air while the crew works on repairing the generator, so let’s not talk about throwing ponies overboard. Second of all, the Valiant was designed to handle rogue lightning strikes, disabling the generators temporarily, so backup generators were installed capable of keeping the ship running at reduced capacity for twelve hours. I can assure you that they will be starting up momentarily.”         As if on cue, the floor began to vibrate again and the few emergency lights that didn’t shatter flickered on. I felt like adding that if plummeting to our deaths was at all similar to being hurtled against a wall at great speed then it was probably one of the more pleasant violent deaths we could  reasonably expect before deciding that bit of news wouldn’t have the calming effect I was aiming for. “Now then, let’s go back to our rooms and have a good night’s sleep, everything will be fine in the morning.”         After that, the crowd slowly began to disperse and I felt Lyra cancel her spell. “Well then,” I said, facing my friends, “Shall we go back to my stateroom? I’m sure Vinyl will be along after she has a talk with with some cruise personnel.”         The other two nodded mutely and followed as I trotted back to my stateroom. “Wow,” Lyra said after a pause, “I didn’t know you were such a diplomancer, although now that I think about it, I can totally see it.”         “Diplo-what now?” I asked, utterly confused by her statement.         “It’s a term from our Mazes & Monsters game. It refers to a character who prefers to talk her way past encounters as opposed to fighting them,” Bon-Bon helpfully filled in.         “Speaking of,” Lyra said, “We totally haven’t played in forever. We need to fix that like… right away.”         “Let’s wait until we get back home,” Bon-Bon said, “I’m sure none of us packed our rulebooks.”         “Actually,” Lyra said, smiling far too enthusiastically for my tastes, “I brought a few with me in case a game broke out at Anthro-Con, but we could totally play here.” Thank Celestia, I would have a chance to play a game for foals and mare-children aboard Equestria’s premiere cruise ship. Lucky me.         “Perhaps we should wait until tomorrow so Vinyl can be with us and we are rested up,” I said, hoping that the delay would allow Lyra’s rapid-fire mind to fixate on other interests. I shot Bon-Bon a conspiratorial look and she nodded her head.         The three of us entered my stateroom and spent the time talking. Thankfully, our stateroom had a fully stocked kitchen and Bon-Bon took the opportunity to prepare a very late dinner for us. After sampling her meal, I am pleased to say that her culinary talents expand well beyond confection making and I think that the next time I feel like having a gourmet meal, I will just see if Bon-Bon wouldn’t mind having us over for dinner.         Several hours later, Vinyl finally walked into the stateroom, her head hung low. “Well then,” Bon-Bon said, “Since you are back I suppose Lyra and I should be heading off to our own rooms, have a good night.”         “Come on, I can go to my room in like five minutes and bring back my rulebooks. Let’s burn the midnight oil with a little M&M. It will be fun.”         “Lyra,” Bon-Bon said, “Let’s give Vinyl and Octavia a chance to talk, we can play in the morning.”         She sighed before heading towards the door. “Alright, have a good night you two.”         Vinyl blinked, her goggles now hanging around her neck, “Does she really want to play M&M on a cruise?”         I nodded, “Yes, yes she does. Are you really surprised at this point.”         “I suppose not,” she said before looking up at me, “And uhmm… thank you for calming the crowd for me. You saved my flank for a second time.”         “It’s fine,” I said, shrugging, “If I didn’t speak up, then somepony else would presumably have. I doubt that an entire crowd of ponies could have forgotten how rigid airships work.”         Vinyl laughed, “You’d be surprised, a few more minutes and they would have been set to throw me overboard.”         “By that time the back-up generators would have powered on and reason would have prevailed. I didn’t really do anything special, it’s not like what you’ve had to put up with the last few weeks.”         “Tavi,” Vinyl said, frowning, “Just stop it. When I needed help, you supported me without a second thought. You did it during Nightmare Night, and you did it again tonight. Yeah, I probably wouldn’t have been thrown overboard, but the second somepony mentioned it, you were there to calm them down, and that’s what a relationship is about. We go through life and support each other when the other needs help. We don’t do it because we are obligated, we do it because we care about the pony in question, and we’ve got that down pat.”         “But… you’ve just done so much for me the past few weeks, and I am worried that the only reason you’ve stuck around is because you feel partly responsible for what happened Nightmare Night.”         She sighed and sat down, “Yeah, I thought about that too, and I guess I do feel responsible. Like, you wouldn’t have put your neck on the line if it wasn’t for me, so it would be kind of not cool of me to abandon you during the fallout-”         “You see,” I said, “That is what I’ve been afraid of, that the only reason we are still together is because you feel guilty and… if that’s the case, I would prefer it if you left. I don’t want to be a burden.”         “Would you let me finish,” she said, “Yeah, I feel responsible, but that doesn’t mean the only reason we are still together is because I feel guilty. If the events of Nightmare Night had happened and I was completely blameless, I would still be helping you because I hate seeing you suffering. Did you save my flank out there tonight because you felt you somehow owed it to me? If, in your head, we were completely square, would you have just sat back and watched as the crowd debated on throwing me overboard?”         “Of course not! I spoke up because I care about you, it didn’t matter that dealing with me the last few days is what led to that particularly ill-advised double drop bass-”         “Double bass drop,” she said, correcting me.         “Yes, that, what mattered was…” I trailed off, finally getting her point.         “See,” she said, climbing into our bed, “Debt doesn’t matter. Not in the heat of the moment, certainly not when you are trying to make a healthy relationship.”         “Alright,” I said, laying down next to her, “But I don’t want to take advantage of your kind nature without offering anything of value in return.”         Vinyl smiled, “That’s good, because that’s not the type of mare I’d want to be in a long-term relationship with.”         “Hmm,” I said, tapping my chin and mulling over her words, “How did you get to be such a relationship expert?”         She laughed and leaned in to kiss my cheek, “Lots of bad ones, most of them my fault. Now let’s get some sleep, I’m pretty sure Lyra wasn’t kidding about that M&M game tomorrow.”         Vinyl was right, she wasn’t. I won’t include the details of the game here other than to say that it took up most of our daylight hours, and that I actually found myself enjoying the game despite the fact that I was on Equestria’s premier cruise ship and could have been doing pretty much anything else. I suppose there is a lesson in there about how spending time with friends can make even the worst experience enjoyable, but such a sentiment strikes me as far too saccharine to ever voice aloud.         After spending over half of our day exploring the world of “Middle-Earth” and doing some silly quest involving a ring and a mountain that we were barely a part of, we decided to break for the day, and eventually decided to meet up later that evening so they could see one of Trixie’s shows without it being interrupted by hecklers and so I could properly apologize for my atrocious behavior earlier that week. It was not something I looked forward to, but at least I’d get to see a magic show beforehoof, that was… something, I suppose.         To Trixie’s credit, the show was well done. She interacted with the crowd, had some volunteers come and test her magical acumen (Vinyl informed me that the last time she did that, she was far less friendly), and succeeded in creating the illusion that she was a powerful wizard capable of bending the rules of space and time to her will. She made creatures appear out of thin air, created an army of duplicates of herself, and then managed to make them all turn into flowers in the blink of an eye. I must admit my ignorance on the subject as I am not sure how much was just visual trickery and how much was magic.         When the show finally ended and the spectating ponies burst into applause, Trixie announced she would be signing autographs, and Vinyl prodded me to go and talk with her. Very reluctantly, I agreed.         Thankfully (or unfortunately), the line wasn’t too long and I soon found myself approaching the powder blue mare. “How can the Great and Powerf-” Her well practiced flourish dropped as recognition entered her eyes, “Oh, it’s you.”         “It is,” I said, nodding my head, “I wanted to apologize for my atrocious behavior the other day. I was… apparently alcohol and my medications don’t interact well with each other.”         “Really?” She asked, “In my experience most doctor’s would tell you not to mix them with alcohol.”         “They did,” Vinyl said, “Well, they told me and I kind of forgot.”         “Anyways,” I said, trying to bring the conversation back on topic, “I wanted to apologize and offer my sincerest apologies. Such a break in proper etiquette is quite unlike me.”         She nodded her head, “I can understand doing things you later regret while being influenced by an outside force. Consider your apology accepted.”         “That…” I let out a sigh of relief, “I must say, that was easier than I expected. I feared you would be rather-”         “Petulant? Reluctant? A year or so ago, I would have been, but I like to think the Great and Powerful Trixie has learned from her mistakes.”         “Yeah, so…” Vinyl said, trying to think of something to say. “Sorry again about running you out of town twice.”         “It’s alright,” she said, “I deserved it the second time, and I’ve grown to accept the first time.”         “Huh,” Vinyl narrowed her eyes, “Are you the same mare who came to our town four years ago?”         “Not at all,” she said, “Nor am I the same mare who tried to take over Ponyville over a year ago. Thankfully, I met somepony who helped me get over myself, so to speak.”         “Now, if you will excuse me, there are several adoring fans behind you and I would hate to disappoint them.” She smiled magnanimously and an adoring little filly walked up next to her and asked for her autograph.         “Was that so hard?” Vinyl asked as we walked away.         “Surprisingly not,” I said, “And by the way, she seems far nicer than you initially described her.”         She shrugged, “Well, she was far nicer than when I originally met her, so I guess that’s pretty fair. Anyways, what now?”         “I was thinking we could go back to our room and spend some time with Lyra and Bon-Bon. We actually discussed it during our spa day, and I think they would appreciate the view.”         Vinyl nodded at that, “Could be fun, a nice quiet kind of low key evening after-”         “After you temporarily deafened everypony in a five mile radius.”         “Yeah, pretty much,” she said, trying not to smile, “The bars in Rainbow Road still haven’t recopened yet, and I know I forgot to mention this last night, but they aren’t going to pay me a single bit after that.”         “I would have been surprised if they did actually. In fact, I am still surprised they aren’t making us pay for damages.”         “Oh, they are totally,” she said as we walked to our room, “Or more accurately, they are charging the account that paid for our room, which means…”         I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose, “Princess Luna is going to get a bill for damages in the next few days?”         “Yep.”         “Wonderful, I do so look forward to explaining that little unexpected expense to my employer.”         “Oh come on, Tavi,” Vinyl said, “Luna will probably be super chill about the whole thing, I mean, she’s so rich she makes your parents look like us.”         “It’s not that,” I said, frowning, “It’s that I feel like I am taking advantage of her generosity. How much work have I done on the orchestra in the last few days? The last few weeks even? Ever since Nightmare Night, Royal Riff has been doing most of the heavy lifting and I’ve been-”         “Recovering from an unexpected trauma trying to defend Equestria. I get where you are coming from, but it’s okay to take some time off.”         “Not when you have been hoofpicked by one of the princesses to do her bidding. Do you think Twilight Sparkle ever took a few weeks off?” “Actually, she did. Like… all the time. In fact, her only real duties when she first came to Ponyville were to write letters about friendship, and that turned out pretty well for her.” “But it’s just…” I sighed as we drew close to our door. “I don’t feel like I deserve any of this. Royal has done most of the heavy lifting and from what I’ve heard he has done a very good job organizing the orchestra in my absence.” “That’s true,” Vinyl said as she turned our combination lock to the right code, “But do you really want to lead an orchestra or do you just want to play your cello? Maybe you were just meant to get the ball rolling before doing something else or maybe all of that orchestra stuff was just a pretext to get you to Ponyville so you could do something even cooler. Who knows?” “That’s,” I paused as we entered our stateroom, “I suppose it merits some thinking about.” As I spoke, I suddenly became aware of a presence behind me and turned around to see Lyra standing behind me. “How did- What are you doing here?” “You invited me and Bon-Bon over tonight, at least, I think it was tonight? Did I get the date wrong or did I get so wrapped up in my studies that I totally skipped a day again. If so, I am so sorry for forgetting last night.”         I shook my head, “No, it’s fine, you just snuck up on me.”         “Oh, sorry then, Bon-Bon should be here soon, she was just getting some items from her room.”         As Lyra spoke, I spotted the familiar cream-colored mare walking down the hall, the tops of several bottles of wine peaking out above her saddle bags.         “Hey,” Vinyl said, “You planning a romantic picnic tonight or-”         She was suddenly cut off as my elbow rammed into her chest. “Oops,” I said as Vinyl shot me a look of annoyance, “There must have been some turbulence of some sort, how unfortunate.”         Thankfully, Vinyl quickly took up the hint that this was not something to be discussing and I could practically see the gears in her brain turning. “Anyways,” I said, “Should we head to the hot- jacuzzi.”         “You know Tavi,” Vinyl said as she entered our suite, “You can just call it a hot tub, you don’t always have to use the bigger fancier word.”         “I know,” I said as I tentatively dipped one hoof into the jacuzzi, “But I have a deep and profound dislike for the word tub.”         “Really?” All three of them asked, following me into the tub.         I nodded, “The word just doesn’t sound right to me, it is so… ugly and unmelodious. It sounds wrong at a very fundamental level, and so I refuse to use it. Hopefully other ponies will do the same and the word will fade from all usage.”         “So then…” Lyra paused, considering her next question carefully, “What do you call a bathtub?”         “I call it the bath or the shower if applicable.”         “Huh,” Vinyl said, “Are there any other words that you have blacklisted?”         “Plenty, but I don’t think I will say them here because unless I have missed my mark, you three will be teasing me about this all night.” For instance, an astute reader will notice that I never once used the word blimp in my writings unless somepony else said it. This most recent revelation should explain why.         “She’s right,” Vinyl said, looking at the other two, “If we get the whole list from her now, then we might use up all our good jokes in one night. This way we can torment her indefinitely.”         I rubbed my forehead, “Is there any situation where you all don’t hold this over my head for the rest of my life?”         “Nope,” Lyra said far too cheerily, “This is pretty much a no-win scenario for you. Technically, I suppose you could kill everypony who knows your secret, but I think that would probably be a bit excessive, and plus you’d go through the rest of your life without your three best friends.”         “Yes,” I said, slowly, “I believe that would be a bit extreme. Thank you for pointing out why that would be wise.” I would question what type of mare would think of murder as a solution so quickly, but then I can’t be too hypocritical when my default response to most threats is to try and punch them.         “Anyways,” Vinyl said, looking at Bon-Bon and grinning oh so slightly, “How do you like the tub?”         “The tub? Oh, you mean the hot tub? Well, as hot tubs go, I think this hot tub is pretty nice. In fact, I can’t recall a nicer hot tub.”         “Yeah!” Lyra said, joining in, “I wish our room had a hot tub, I mean, is there anything in Equestria better than a hot tub?”         The rest of the night went on like that for some time, with the conversation only occasionally steering away from jacuzzis and baths. It even got to the point that I brought up humans just to distract Lyra. Celestia help me, I did what I had to do to stay sane. After a while, I caught Bon-Bon winking at me, and I quickly took the hint to make myself and Vinyl scarce.         “Vinyl dear,” I said, kissing her on the cheek, “I found a book in our library the other day that I think you might be interested in. We should really go look at it now.”         “You two have a library?” Lyra asked, shooting out of the tub in an instant, “Where is it? Does it have any books on humans?”         I chastised myself for my terrible diversion. Considering the fact that I had two days to prepare a plausible sounding excuse there really was no forgiving it, and while we are on the topic of things I should have done, I should have told Vinyl of the plan in the first place.         “No books on humans,” I said, getting out of the jacuzzi and gesturing for Vinyl to follow me, “I… you wouldn’t be interested in any of the books in the library, and…” I sighed, “I need to have a private talk with Vinyl for a few minutes.”         “Got it,” she said, winking at me, “You and Vinyl need some ‘private’ time. Alone. Surrounded by books. Could that be any hotter?”         Bon-Bon, if you ever read this, I want you to know just how hard it was to stick to the plan after you spent an entire night teasing me over the t-word and then having to deal with Lyra making some very lewd insinuations, so just remember how good a friend I was this night if I ever ask you for a future favor.         “So,” Vinyl said as I closed the library door, “What did you want to talk about?”         “Nothing,” I said, “I just wanted to give our two friends some alone time. You know, the two friends who have been dating for years.”         “If they wanted alone time, they could have gone to their own room.” Vinyl said, completely oblivious to all of my subtle hinting.         “Vinyl, why did I agree to go to Anthro-Con in the first place?”         “Because you wanted to be there for our friends when Bon-Bon pro- Oh. I get it now.”         “Finally,” I said taking a seat at the table in the middle of the room, “So I suppose now we just wait.”         “How long do you think it will take?” She asked, sitting next to me.         “If I was planning the engagement, I would say a half an hour. First it would take a few minutes to get the conversation on an appropriate topic, about twenty minutes of suitably romantic conversation, then about five minutes to give the speech I had prepared before finally asking the mare in question to marry me.”         “Wow,” she said, rubbing the back of her neck, “Good thing you aren’t proposing then.”         “Not today,” I said, smiling slightly.         “Oh, wow,” she said, suddenly sitting up straight, “You would actually be up for that? I mean, I know it could happen but…”         I laughed, ‘Vinyl, our third date involved me escorting you to the middle of a spooky forest so I could beat up monsters and save you. It didn’t work out quite like I had planned, but at the same time I don’t think our relationship is on the same timetable as everypony else’s.”         “That’s true, going to the forest and beating up monsters is really more of a fifth date activity. So… do you wanna?” She tilted her head and gestured towards the door.         “With a proposal like that, absolutely not, and more importantly, I don’t want to steal Lyra and Bon-Bon’s moment. This is their night, we can wait a few more months.”         “Sounds good,” she said, leaning in to kiss me. I’m afraid after that, my sense of time got a bit… let’s call it unfocused, but I was finally brought back to reality when a high pitched squeal came in from the other room.         “So,” Vinyl said, “Is that our cue?”         “I would give it thirty more seconds,” I said as I pulled out the bottles of champagne and fizzy grape juice Bon-Bon and I had stored in here the day previous as well as a four fluted glasses, “I would hate to walk in on them as they’re doing something private. Now help me pour.”         She nodded and poured three glasses of champagne and one glass of fizzy grape juice. “You two really planned this out didn’t you?”         “We have,” I said, grabbing my glass with one forehoof while Vinyl levitated the other three next to her.         “And you didn’t tell me because…”         “I would have, but there wasn’t the right time. It didn’t seem like an appropriate topic to bring up last night, and we spent most of today around Lyra.”         “Alright,” she said, stepping beside me.         “Now then,” I said after kissing Vinyl’s neck, “Are you ready to go out and congratulate the ponies of the hour?”         “Of course, they’ve been practically married for so long it’s weird for me to realize that they aren’t actually married. Might as well celebrate them taking the first step towards making it official.”         With that the two of us walked out into the main room, glasses at the ready to celebrate good things to come with our two best friends, and many hours later when the sun finally rose over Equestria, we were treated to one of the most magnificent sunrises I had ever seen.         It should go without saying that she said yes.