C-R-O-W-N-E-D S-O-U-L

by Mordy

Ch. 2 I'm Not a Ball

As I passed through the dimension between dimensions I ended up in an alley between two of Ponyville’s houses. Granted one of those houses was floating upside down and the other was made out of chocolate pudding, but this all seemed normal by Discord standards. I also found it quite humorous and I really don’t understand why some ponies look upon this in horror. It seems fairly harmless… to a degree. I suppose it would make it harder to get inside your homes and you may not want to sleep on pudding.

Anyway, I peeked out into the streets and sure enough the whole town was in chaos. Looked like Candyland out there, what with mismatched colored hills and other odd array of colors. Ponies were running around like it was the end of the world while others were under Discord’s magic and were thus embracing the chaos or adding to it.

I found it all… glorious. The negative emotions were at an all-time high for these ponies and I was having the most wonderful feast! How I fed was similar yet different than changelings. For one, the emotion had to be felt by the target or targets. For changelings that had to be love, but for me it had to be other emotions like fear, anger, or sorrow. The biggest difference between us, besides what we ate, was how we fed. A changeling needs to be close to their meal to be able to use their magic to feed, but I on the other hand only needed to be within range. And boy, what range did I have. It wasn’t as large as when I was in my ultimate form, but I could feel all of ponyville’s pain being drawn into me. I was like a lightning rod for the stuff.

While it wasn’t at the levels of the Crystal Empire in its prime, it was enough to get me going. I even managed to solidify myself. I still looked a bit gooey or slimy, but at least my form was more stable.

With not much else to do, I simply wandered around Ponyville, taking in the odd sights and sounds. I merely hopped along here and there while giggling at the misfortunes of others. From stampedes of long legged bunnies, to pegasi getting caught in cotton candy clouds, to ponies slip and sliding on chocolate puddles. It was like watching cartoons again, only it was now live!

Thankfully, everyone was content to ignore me, so I was just sitting around and chuckling to myself at their misery. Of course, I made sure not to open my mouth to reveal my eye. If ponies were panicking at Discord’s antics then the uproar that would happen at seeing me would draw much unneeded attention. Last thing I needed was the Elements of Harmony on my tail.

My power was returning slowly, but I’d soon be able to defend myself at least and get around without too much trouble. I was planning my next move when I noticed I was now floating.

I blinked, I didn’t think I had gotten enough power to do that again, but then I started to rise faster and higher from the ground. That’s when I realized something was lifting me up. Then I heard the chuckling.

“Well now, what do we have here?” a very familiar voice asked from behind me.

There was only one thought that went through my mind. Please tell me that’s John de Lancie…

I was turned around to find myself disappointed and staring at Discord. The draconequus gave me a toothy grin as began to juggle me between his mismatched appendages before finally holding me in front of his face again. It was at that moment that I learned I could sweat profusely.

“I’ve never seen something like you before and I’ve practically seen it all,” Discord said as he gave a hearty chuckle. He occasionally squished my sides like I was toy. I was glad I didn’t make squeaking sounds. I might not have had any grudge with him before, but now that was starting to change. I would have loved to glare at him with big eye. However, I bet if I just did nothing he’d get bored with me and move on.

He tossed me around a few more times before he stopped. He looked at me once, trying to determine what I was before shrugging. “Well, whatever you are I can bother you later. I have other things I could be doing.”

He lightly threw me to the ground where upon impact I bounced right up where he caught me again. I even made a little noise when I had hit the ground. Discord just looked at me with a blank expression before a mischievous grin spread across his face.

Oh no…

That’s when Discord then threw me up into the air and when he caught me again he was now wearing a basketball jersey. Upon closer inspection I saw that it consisted of blue, white, red, and gold. As it turns out, Discord was an honorary Globetrotter and even started to whistle out their theme.

You can probably guess what happened next. He started dribbling me around Ponyville like a basketball. He bounced me between his legs, doing little tricks with me, and even spinning me on his claws. When I wasn’t dizzy I was getting slammed itno the ground with each bounce. The only upside was that the power I kept drawing from ponies was easing the pain and I had the foresight to know that the Elements of Harmony would take care of him soon enough. Too bad that wasn’t soon enough!

The next thing that happened was Discord summoning a basketball hoop and then shooting me at it. I slammed against the backboard and fell neatly through the net, hitting the ground with a few painful bounces. There was even a buzzer and scoreboard that appeared.

After I stopped bouncing my two white eyes widened. There was now a basketball court and two teams of Discords and one dressed as a referee. I found that last one to be a bit of an oxymoron.

Thus began the miserable and rough game of chaos basketball. I was tossed around so much I thought I would have blown chunks if I had stomach. I never thought the Lord of Chaos would get so much entertainment out of little old me. I was just glad I was able to remain quiet during the whole thing. I could afford no hint of who I am nor did I want to give Discord the satisfaction that he was making me so miserable that I was missing my little crystal prison.

One painful game of twenty-one later, Discord stopped and dismissed his clones, the court, and his attire. He sighed, “Well, now I’m bored.”

Oh, thank God…

That’s when he changed into a soccer uniform. “How about a new game?”

NOOOO!!!

I was trembling at that point, but then salvation came my way as a pony shouted at the draconequus, “Hold it right there Discord!”

I couldn’t see, but I recognized that voice. Discord turned his head to the one that called out and grinned. “Why hello there Twilight! How has your day been?”

I was nearly in tears as I was filled with the joy knowing I’d soon be free of this new torment. Discord was even kind enough to drop me to the ground to give the elements his full attention. I kind of drowned out the conversation from there. I was too busy letting my unseen bruises heal to try and get away. Not that it would matter now.

I watched as the rainbow came crashing down on Discord leaving him… unscathed? I blinked and would have rubbed my eyes if had the means to do so.

Why isn’t he turned to stone? Why is he still here? That doesn’t make any sense! He should be–

My thoughts were interrupted when I looked at the Elements of Harmony. First thing I noticed that Rainbow Dash was missing and instead there was the purple dragon Spike, recently dubbed as the new Rainbow Dash. The other bearers were also monochrome except for Twilight. This meant they had only just found the Elements of Harmony.

As Discord started his spiel of depressing Twilight and making fun of her failure, I thought this would be a good time to sneak away. So, I started to hop my little self away, feeling annoyed and a bit of pain with each bounce. Unfortunately I didn’t get far before Discord had his one goat hoof leg holding me down.

“Now where do you think you’re going?” Discord asked as he kicked me up and started to keep me in the air using only his legs and knees. “We can’t play our game if our ball runs away!” His clones returned in soccer get ups now.

So, I became his punching bag for the next hour or so. I was kicked all over the place and with each passing second I started to hate the mane six more and more for taking so long. Also didn’t help that I thought soccer was boring. Seemed Discord shared my sentiments because he grew bored faster than our first game. At first I was thankful for this, but then Discord came up with a new game; rugby.

Have you ever played or seen a game of rugby? It’s a rough sport, like football. I never played it myself until that day and I would never want to again. It seemed less about scoring and more about beating the crud out of everyone else or in this case, me. So, I got crushed, pummeled, squashed, and every other synonym for a beat down.

My very existence seemed to be nothing, but misery at this point. I was thankful when Discord wanted to rest and sat on his makeshift throne of chaos in the center of Ponyville. Too bad he kept me around and was spinning me on his talon. I was gonna be permanently dizzy at this rate.

He set me on the chairs arm so he could drink some chocolate milk. “Ah, chaos is such a wonderful, wonderful thing!” He was about to sip triumphantly from his drink, but then at that moment I suddenly had a sense of déjà vu.

“Not as wonderful as friendship!” Twilight shouted at him, the other bearers behind her and ready for action.

Finally! It took them long enough. I’ll even look pass that corny line if it means Discord is out of my hair! Figuratively speaking of course.

“Oh, this again?” Discord groaned as he sipped away the glass instead of the milk. He looked at the chocolate for a moment before tossing it over his shoulder and causing an explosion where it hit.

“That’s right! You couldn’t break apart our friendship for long.” Applejack called out.

Discord just rolled his eyes. “Oh Applejack don’t lie to me,” he started as he used his magic to pull her and the other bearers except Twilight by their necklaces over to him. “Will you ever learn?”

Don’t suppose we can fast forward this? I’m really eager to have this done and over with!

Twilight teleported into the center of the group and put a shield around her and her friends as she floated them safely back to the ground, much to Discords annoyance. I actually giggled a little and Discord took notice for a moment before regarding it as his overactive imagination.

Twilight started her clichéd hero speech as Discord start using me as a stress ball, squeezing me between his lion paw and eagle claw. I may not have revealed my mouth, but my eyes could still show levels of emotion such as my pain. This didn’t go unnoticed by Fluttershy.

I drowned out most of Twilights little lesson just because it made me want to groan in annoyance just as much as it did Discord. Although, Discord was more audible with his displeasure as he got up in their faces with me in tow. “Ugh, gag! Fine go ahead and try and use your little elements. Friend me! Just make it quick,” he said as he teleported back to his throne and some pigs with wings flew by. “I’m missing some excellent chaos here!”

“Alright ladies,” Twilight began, “Let’s show him what friendship can do!”

“Oh, wait, wait, wait!” Pinkie Pie quickly said as she took one last chocolate rain shower. We all just stared at her antics before she returned to the group. I shouldn’t have been as surprised by that as I was.

The girls began to glow as their elements started to power up. Discord merely yawned with boredom. I gave off a knowing chuckle which caught Discord’s attention, but I didn’t care at this point. It wasn’t until the elements started to really kick into overdrive that he realized he was in trouble. “No!” he shouted as he finally dropped me and I bounced away laughing devilishly at his misfortune.

The orbital friendship cannon fired and blasted that nuisance back into a stony prison while restoring the land back to its original state. Meanwhile, I just rolled off to safety… sort of. Unfortunately, I had been so beat up I no longer had the energy to move. That wasn’t why I was in trouble. The reason I was a bit nervous was because I had rolled over to the mane six.

While they were happy at Discord’s defeat, when they finally noticed me their happiness turned to looks of confusion as I just stared up at them. I felt even more uncomfortable as they surrounded me trying to make heads or tails of me.

“Uh, what is it?” Applejack was the first to ask as she scratched the side of her head in a worthless attempt to get info out of her miniscule brain.

Twilight looked over me, but didn’t touch me. “I’m not sure; I’ve never seen anything like it. From the looks of it I think it might have been Discord’s pet. What with the way he held onto it earlier.”

I glared at the lavender mare at her referring to me as his pet. If he was my owner then he was a very abusive one.

Rainbow Dash hovered over me and eyed me suspiciously. “If it is his pet then shouldn’t we blast it as well?” It might have been hard to tell, but my eyes widened and darted left to right in an attempt to shake my head as if I was trying to communicate no.

“Now Dash, you shouldn’t be so quick to judge. Could just be some innocent… whatever it is, that was being bullied by Discord,” Rarity chipped in, making her my favorite pony at that moment in time.

It was then Pinkie decided to poke me. “Gooey!” she giggled out as I winced in horrible pain as she touched a sore spot.

I was in so much agony I finally passed out. The last thing I heard was Fluttershy squeaking, “You poor thing!” Then I saw only darkness…