//------------------------------// // The Initial Decision (Prequel) // Story: Ponyville: Day 1 // by SteelChords //------------------------------// It was a nice funeral. I wasn't comforted at the idea of where they were though. Just the idea that they weren't there with me anymore was enough to cause my insides to twist and turn as if they were having a nightmare. That's what I hoped all of this was: just a nightmare. I hoped with every fiber of my being that I could just smack myself hard enough that I'd lurch forward in bed, open my eyes, and hear their happy voices downstairs while they laughed at each other over breakfast. If this was a dream, however, Luna surely would've woken me up by now. I just didn't want to face the idea that they were gone, and there was nothing I could do to get them back. I didn't even, really, get to say goodbye. I know that funerals are meant for friends and relatives to, spiritually, say goodbye to those who passed, but I wished I could've told them, before they passed, how much they meant to me. If it weren't for my best friend, I would've felt completely alone. He came up behind me and put his hoof on my shoulder, as I stood staring at the tombstones that I could only see as the faces of those I would never see again. "I know I've said this a hundred times today alone, but I'm really sorry for your loss, bro." I didn't respond. I didn't even look away from those tombstones. I just kept staring, as if my pain and my suffering could bring them back. As if my sole desire at that moment would reverse all of the events that had occurred in the last week. As if, I could change the past just by wishing for it. But, even in a world where magic is as common as gravity, nopony could reverse death. "Come on, I'll take you out for ice cream. Will that make you feel better?" he asked. I simply nodded. It really wouldn't help much, but I figured it would be better for me to try to do something that would take my mind off of things. I turned my face away from the graves of my loved ones, and walked back to the cathedral. Although I couldn't think about it without breaking down inside, I appreciated Ray for being there to console me. He knew as well as I did that if I felt like I had nopony there beside me in a moment of need that I would become suicidal. It had happened before, when we were younger, back in middle school. I had only just survived that encounter with death itself. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't considering hanging myself from my chandelier or a swing set or something that would serve the desired purpose, but inside I knew that's not what they would want me to do, and I knew Ray was hurting as much as I was, just by seeing me in this much agony. I was almost too distraught to fly safely to the ice cream parlor. The wind in my face stung my eyes when, on any other day, it would just blow, soothingly, through my mane. The tears I had been holding back alerted me of their presence as we descended. By then it was too late. I had forgotten one of the most important rules about flying: don't fly while crying. Something about shedding tears while flying tended to cause pegasus ponies' bodies to randomly quit functioning, and I seemed to be falling victim to that. My vision started getting fuzzy and I was losing control of my other senses. My wings wouldn't do what I was trying to tell them to do, and I began to spiral down to the clouds below. I could hear Ray yelling my name from my one, still functioning ear, as the clouds below got closer and closer. He sounded about as helpless as I felt. My body wouldn't respond to me, just as I couldn't respond to him. I could see him speeding towards me as fast as he could. He was a blur, but then again everything was a blur at the moment. I was falling too fast, there's no way he would have enough time to reach me. I closed my eyes and braced for impact. "I'll see you soon, guys." I thought hoping that my loved ones had heard my thoughts. As I had anticipated, I slammed into the soft texture of the clou-... wait a second. If I had just made impact with the clouds, why could I still feel wind flowing through my mane. I opened my eyes as far as I could, and looked down at what I had slammed into. It had fur... and feathers... My initial thought was that Ray had managed to catch up to me, but that didn't make any sense. He was much too far away to have even reached my back hooves, much less gotten underneath me so that I would be able to ride on his back. Then I noticed something else: the fur wasn't even Ray's color. This was somepony else. Somepony fast, and obviously very strong. I tried to lift my head to see who was carrying me, but as I turned my head to the right, I began to get extremely light headed. All I saw were clouds whizzing by and the faint sight of bright colors flapping like wings beside my face. My body slowly started relaxing again, and soon my head gave in to the inevitable, falling back down onto the pony's back, as I blacked out. I found myself in a rather odd place. I was standing, but there was nothing below me, except empty space. I felt claustrophobic in the place I was in, but there seemed to be no walls or barriers of any kind around me. Just bright stars and vast darkness. Now I felt odd for a completely different reason. "Hello?" I called, hoping somepony would answer me and tell me where I was. "Helloooooo!" "Why hello there, Steel." greeted a friendly sounding voice. The greeting sounded like it came from everywhere, yet nowhere, all at the same time. I couldn't see who was talking at all, so I immediately got terrified. "Please don't let this be a horror movie nightmare. Please don't let this be a horror movie nightmare." my thoughts said repeatedly, in fear. "There is no reason to fear me, Steel. I am here to help you in what appears to be your time of need." said the same voice again. They had a rather loud voice, almost regal, perhaps. Their words didn't console me though. I still didn't like the idea that whoever was talking to me wouldn't reveal themselves to me. Frustrated, I shouted, "If there's no reason to fear, why can't I see who's speaking to me?!" Almost immediately after the last word left my mouth, there was a blindingly bright flash of light directly in front of me. Subconsciously, I threw my front hooves up to block my eyes from the apparent supernova that had materialized in my face. For a few more seconds the blinding light shone in my face and then slowly settled down to reveal a night-sky colored alicorn with a similarly colored tiara and flowing, dark purple mane and tail. She smiled at me warmly. "Princess Luna" I said in awe. I knew I was supposed to bow in the presence of royalty, but I was too stunned that all of this was happening to even blink, much less fall to the non-existent ground. My mouth fell open, and hung there limply for a few seconds. I knew that she could read my thoughts right then, but I hoped that she wouldn't want to. I hoped she would respect my privacy and just start talking to me about why she was here in the first place. "So, you want to know why I'm here?" Apparently my thoughts were like a best selling book in the moment we were currently in. I regathered myself for a second, took a deep breath, looked her in the eye, and asked, "Why are you here? Why am I here? Where is here?" She looked at me for a second, with that same warm smile on her face. "Well, to start off, I don't even know exactly where we are. This is my favorite sight to behold, simply for the natural beauty it radiates, and the immense feeling of joy it brings me when I'm feeling alone or abandoned." It was a beautiful sight, I'm not gonna lie. The indescribable sensation I was lucky enough to see spread out before me was magnificent. Mortal words would do no good to describe it. However, I still wanted to know... "As far as why you're here," she continued, "And why I'm here, the answer is as simple as retracing your steps." I must've had the most confused face at that moment, because the princess glanced over to me only momentarily before continuing. "You are having trouble facing the fact that your family, the only ponies in Equestria that you could always go to for any problem or any celebratory announcement, have suffered untimely demises, correct?" I nodded. She continued, "What you fail to realize is that, although they are not there with you anymore, physically, they are always with you spiritually." "Ok, I have another question... What does that mean?" I asked, completely befuddled. "Why don't you ask us?" said a voice behind me. That voice... it sounded just like... but it couldn't be... it wasn't possible... I turned around to where the voice had come from. "Hello son.", my parents said. "Hey bro!", my little brother chimed in. Ok, first I was confused, then I was befuddled. At the sound of my family's voices, I became completely dumbfounded. They were here... they were here for me... I couldn't contain myself. The last week of not having them there in my life had taken it's tole, and now it was time to get something back from it. I galloped over to my loved ones, and we all embraced in a group hug. They still felt alive, as if nothing bad had ever happened. I could feel the warm, but strong embrace that my father's hugs always provided, along with the soft, tender, loving embrace that made my mom who she was, and of course my little brother, always so cute with the way he could never be left out of the middle of any family embrace, encounter or event, squeezed and squirmed his way in the center of the hug. This was more than I ever could have asked for. I got to see my family again. Whether it was for the rest of eternity, or just the next few minutes, I could finally tell them what I wanted to tell them before they left. "So, Son, what do you think of Heaven's visitors area?" my dad jokingly asked me. "I just can't believe you all are here. I missed you so much." I paused for a moment as the emotions of the last week slowly came back to me. "I need you guys with me. I can't live without you." We broke the embrace and began to look each other over wondering who was going to say something next, and what they would say I noticed my mom looking down at her hooves with an expression that looked like she was dreading what she would say next. She looked back at me and said with the straightest tone of voice I'd ever heard her use, "I'm sorry Steel, but you're going to have to. We can't simply come back to life. Everypony has their time. Our time has come." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. How could they be so accepting of this tragedy? How?! "But, I can't lose you. You're all I have... or... all I had. There's nopony else that can fill your places. You were supposed to be there with me when I won my first Equestria Music Award. You were supposed to be there to help me realize what I need to do after I've screwed up my first relationship, and to give me advice on how to raise foals of my own." Tears began to trickle down my face. "You were supposed to be there..." It felt like I was losing them all over again. They were my whole life. I needed them more than they realized. It felt like a black hole was forming where my heart was slowly dying, and it was sucking the happiness out of everything that I'd ever known. They didn't want to come back with me... "We weren't taken from you, Steel. We were called home. We were called home, because we had served our purposes in Equestria. We had helped everypony that we were meant to help, and we had made a difference to everypony that we were meant to. We had done what we were born to do. Now, we're needed back where we first came from." my dad said, in his best lecture voice. "It's time for you to accept that we're gone, and try to enjoy the rest of your life. You have so much left to do, so many more ponies' lives to change, and so many hearts to touch. Even as we speak, there's somepony out there that needs you now more than you need us. Somepony in Ponyville that will look to you like you look to us. You have to be there, now." My brother was one of the smartest colts I knew, but this was probably one of the wisest things I'd ever heard him say. He sounded like he'd lived to be 100 years old, and learned all about everything pony-kind could never begin to understand. I was so proud of him. "Don't worry, we'll still be with you, every step of the way. We just won't be there in the way we were before." my mom said, trying to console me. "But we need you to learn that everything happens for a reason, and that all we can do is smile at it, and know it was meant to be. Please keep smiling. You have the greatest smile, and so many other ponies need to benefit from it." my mom said, a loving look in her eyes as she brought her hoof up to tenderly graze my cheek. "You need to be there for Equestria, like you want us to be there for you." they all said together. My mind was a mix of emotions right then. Who were they to say that everything would be alright; that I would be able to move on from this; that I didn't need them anymore? But, who was I to say that my happiness was more important than their peace? How could I take them from this place of obvious paradise, and bring them back to where they could easily be put back in harm's way. Sure I needed them, but was I really so helpless that I couldn't carry on if I didn't have them physically beside me? I fell to the non-existent ground below me as the weight of the burden I was now forced to carry was laid on my shoulders. Once again, tears began to rain down from my sad, sad eyes. I put my head down and covered my face to cry. Everything was so messed up, and I was just expected to deal with it, as difficult as that would be for me. I felt a hoof on my shoulder, and simultaneously two more joined the first. I looked up to see my family looking down at me with comforting expressions. "We know that you've lost a lot, but, as I told you many times growing up, 'It's not the blessings we've been given that defines us. It's how we cope with the tragedies we're faced with.'", my dad said as he brought me into a hug. "We will always love you, and if you ever feel that you need us, we'll be there to help any way we can." my mom reassured me as she came into the hug as well. "Besides, you'll be with us again someday. You'll have plenty of adventures to tell us about when that happens." my brother chimed in, squirming into the middle of the hug. I couldn't help but chuckle a little bit. He was always such an optimist. That's one of the things I always loved about him. There was a bright flash of light behind them, and they all turned away from me to look at where it had come from. "It's time we went." my dad said. "Wait, what? You're leaving? Where are you going? Come back!" I said with a panicked voice. "Remember, we'll always love you." my mom said with a smile that made tears come to my eyes again. "Wait... how will I be able to talk to you again? Where are you going to? What do you mean there's somepony out there who needs me right now? Don't leave me with so many questions! Please!" "We'll see you soon, but not too soon, okay?" my brother said cheerfully. "No... not you too! Please! There's still so much more I want to ask you! PLEASE DON'T GO!!" They all walked back towards the giant flash of light, and stood together as a family as the ever growing supernova engulfed them. Soon enough, all I saw were their shadows in the bright light. "Just smile... you have such a wonderful smile..." my mom's voice trailed away. There was another quick flash of light, like that of a camera, and both the supernova and my family were gone. My knees collapsed, and I fell back down to the non-existent floor. I could hardly comprehend what all had just happened before me. Just like the first time, they were there, alive and happy, and then just as simply as they came, they were gone. But there was a difference between when they died and what happened just now: when they died, they were taken away. When they left me just now, they were called home. I felt happy for them, yet still very sad. As much as I wanted them to be with me, they were sure that I didn't need them anymore, and if they truly believed that, then I should believe that too. I needed to remain in Equestria so that I could touch all the hearts that I was meant to touch, reach all the ponies I was meant to reach, and change the lives of either few or many, just like they had done. I had to follow in their hoofsteps, otherwise they would have died in vain. I had to be the best pony I could be. "I think it's time now that you be called back to where you belong." said Princess Luna. She nearly made me jump out of my wings. I had completely forgotten that she was still there behind me. She chuckled awkwardly, "Sorry that I startled you." I shrugged it off. Seriously, how could I be mad at the princess that allowed me to see my family again. "They were right. It's not my time." I thought. "Now I have to go make my mark on Equestria with the time I have left." "I wish you the best, Steel Chords. May your life be lengthy and fulfilling." she said. I closed my eyes, and prepared myself for what I was to face back in Cloudsdale. My vision was blurry as I blinked my eyes a couple of times. Where was I? This looked nothing like the ice cream parlor. I was lying in a rather rough-matressed bed with the sheets pulled up to my chin. I had absolutely no feeling at all in any part of my body, excluding my head of course. I turned my head to the left as best I could. I could have been wearing a hospital gown, or become a completely different species from the neck down and I wouldn't know. There was a giant monitor sitting next to my bed with a red line beeping every time it crossed the screen in the same zig-zag pattern. There was a bedside table set up next to it, with a lamp, a book ('The life and times of The Great and Powerful Trixie'... not worth reading), and a rather small sized glass of water. I forced my head to turn to my right. There was a large, open window immediately opposite where my head was laid, and there was a couple of benches set up along the wall. It wasn't the setup that really caught my attention, but the colt that was sprawled out all across the entire length of both benches. He was always there for me. How long he'd been laying there, I had no idea. He looked absolutely exhausted, probably from helping whoever it was that got me to the hospital. I watched as his eyes fluttered open, momentarily confused as to where he was. He looked over to my bed, and it appeared that he remembered what all was going on. Slowly, he scanned my body up to where my head was laid on the pillow. When he saw my eyes looking back at his, his face lit up like the sunrise. "Steel!" he shouted coming over to my side. "Oh, Celestia. You really had me scared there, buddy. How many times have I told you? Don't die! It's bad for your health!" he looked at me and smirked a bit. Yep, he was the same Ray that I remembered. I smiled at him while I tried to sit up a little bit in my bed. "Oh, pony feathers." I mumbled "What the hay happened?" I asked him, hoping he could tell me. His face got instantly dimmer. He looked like he had been working on a way to answer this question for a while, but he still didn't know what to say. He finally decided on, "Just as we were descending towards the ice cream parlor, I looked over at you, and you fell at a nose dive right out of the sky. I'm sorry I wasn't able to keep you from this. I should have known you were in no condition to fly. I shouldn't have been so careless." I hated that he was beating himself up over me. This wasn't like him at all. "Hey, bud." I said to him with a smile. "It's not your fault, okay? It was nopony's fault. Stuff just happens that you can't always be ready for. Calm down." He seemed to relax a bit at me saying this, but he still seemed a little tense. He wasn't telling me everything. "I guess this means I'm gonna have to ask him, if he's not gonna tell me." I thought. "Ray? How am I here? Who caught me when I fell out of the air?" He looked at me hesitantly. Why didn't he want to tell me? What was on his mind that he couldn't let go of? Finally, he sighed in exasperation, and spoke. "If I had only been faster, I could have saved you myself. If it weren't for Rainbow Dash, you wouldn't even be here right now." He paused for a moment. "You were dead, bro. For almost half an hour, you were dead." He looked like he couldn't hate himself more right then if somepony had told him that he'd committed murder while sleepwalking. I had to console the guy. He had nothing to feel guilty about, and he didn't deserve to be hurting like this. "Ray. Bro. You did all that you could. I wouldn't have asked you to do more than that. And, sure I was dead for almost half an hour. I'm alive now, and I'm not planning on dying again for a while. So, calm down bud. You really shouldn't waste your energy worrying about something you couldn't have prevented in the first place. Besides, if you weren't there with me when all of this happened, I probably wouldn't be able to tell you right now how much I've appreciated your company since..." I cringed "...the incident... You're the best friend I could ask for right now, and I can't stand to watch you beat yourself up over this." He turned around and looked at me with a look in his eye that I read to say, "Do you really mean that?" "C'mon bro. I could never be mad at you for being there for me when I needed you. The thing is, though, I'm gonna need your help to get me through this tragedy. Don't let the fact that I had an accident in the air get to you. It was never your fault." I pulled him into a gentle hug. I could tell he was feeling better after I told him that, and he definitely needed to hear it. He was like a brother to me, now more than ever. I needed to take care of him like he took care of me. The door flew open and the doctor walked in holding his clipboard in his left wing, and his pen in his mouth. He looked down at me and smiled. "Glad to see you're finally awake now. You gave us quite the scare there." It turns out that I had sprained my right wing, broken a few of my ribs, all four of my legs below the knees, and had a slight concussion, which seemed to be clearing up already. I was forced to lay in that horrible hospital bed for a week and a half before they would even let me onto a wheelchair. They said that once I was on the wheelchair, I'd be back walking in about 2 weeks at the most. During that time, I had plenty of time to think about my experience with Princess Luna and my family. The one thing that they said that kept playing over and over in my head was when my brother told me: "Somepony in Ponyville...will look to you like you look to us." I had to find out what he meant by that, and I had a feeling we both knew what that would mean I would have to do. I called the nurse in and asked if she could send out for Ray. "Tell him I'm doing fine, but I need to talk to him about something." When he arrived at the hospital, I told him everything I'd been thinking about. When I was finished, he just looked at me with that face I knew all too well: approval. "Hey, you were gonna go to Ponyville to try to further your career as a musician anyway, right? That's all you were talking about before... the incident..." he reminded me. I had completely forgotten about that. Immediately I thought to myself, "I hope I have something to take with me to Ponyville. I can't just go empty hooved." As if reading my thoughts Ray pulled my saddlebags up onto the bedside table next to me. "Unfortunately, all that survived was a few records, a pouch with two bits in it, and a photo album of yours. It's not much, I know, but-" I cut him off, snatching the album from him. I looked at it in my hooves for a second, wondering what was hidden behind the front cover of this relic. Slowly and carefully, I opened the cover, as if opening it too fast would cause it to spontaneously combust in my hooves. What was inside made my heart melt with joy. Every picture my parents had ever taken of me, of my brother, and of the family together, was gathered in this one, material artifact. I made a silent promise to myself that I would keep this photo album, and all of it's contents safe, no matter what the cost. A few weeks later, I was declared 'fully healed' by the doctors, and they let me walk home under my own power. I had grown to accept what had happened over the course of those few weeks. Ray and I had never been closer and, honestly, I think his special somepony was beginning to get jealous (don't tell him I said that). We had discussed the idea of me moving to Ponyville several times, and he supported me fully. I'd had a few friends and fans come visit me while I was recovering. Even Rainbow Dash came and visited me. We got the chance to talk about the day I'd fallen out of the sky, and future plans we had for ourselves. It turns out that she was planning to move out to Ponyville as well, for a job on the weather team. She told me to try and find her whenever I got released from the hospital and moved out there. I had thanked her for so much that day. Since she'd done so much for me, I had to try and do something for her in return. Then I had an idea. I asked her what her favorite song was. "Wow, you're really making me choose? Well... I'd have to say that my favorite song right now would be 'Back to Basic'. I crank it up every time I listen to it." she said with an amused laugh. I wasn't honestly expecting her to choose one of my own songs. I knew she liked my music just as much as the next pony, but I didn't consider that she enjoyed it that much. I have to say, it was flattering. So, I looked over at my bag and pulled out one of the records of my original songs. "Thanks again, for everything." I said giving her the record. She looked at me with a look of pure shock, as if she couldn't believe any of this was happening. "Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Oh My Gosh! OH MY GOSH!" she squealed with glee. She had a smile that reached ear to ear as she held the record. If I wasn't in a rather critical condition, she probably would've tackled me in a hug. I smiled, glad that I could repay her somehow. So, I stand here now, where my house used to stand and where my family and I used to live, waiting for the sunrise. All that I have is all that I need, and I know i'm not alone. Although they're not here with me physically, they're always walking alongside me. They're always right behind me and right alongside me. I looked up at the stars as Luna's moon slowly began to dip below the horizon, and saw a formation of stars, that seemed to form a face. Wait a second... I knew that face. I heard my mom's voice in my head, "Just smile... you have the most wonderful smile..." I looked up at the face in the stars, and I could have sworn I saw it wink at me. "Oh mom" I thought with a chuckle, and for the first time in what seemed like forever, I genuinely smiled. The sun rose slowly over the horizon, causing the face in the stars to fade away. I blinked back a tear, turned towards Ponyville, and lifted off.