//------------------------------// // Part 12 Dan Vs. Couples Chapter: 106 Pinkie Vs. Bathroom Blitz // Story: The Wheel and the Butterfly A Dan X Pinkie Pie Saga // by Justice3442 //------------------------------// The Wheel and the Butterfly A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga Part 12 Dan Vs. Couples Chapter 106 Pinkie Vs. Bathroom Blitz -ooooooo- There was a brief moment as Pinkie stared back at the two women in the doorway as they simply stared back at her. All three of the girls considered what they should do next as they stood near the entrance of the narrow bathroom. The bathroom, much like the rest of the house, had a bit of an eastern and far eastern theme to it and sported a tiled teal floor surrounded by wood-grain-colored walls. “Look,” Jean began, “we have you outnumbered, so—” ‘Pow!’ “OW!” Jean cried as Pinkie retracted her fist. Jean clutched at her nose with both her hands. “You hit me!” “You kidnapped me!” Pinkie said as she threw her hands up in the air. “But we’re trying to help!” Jean insisted. “I don’t know, Jean…” Jennifer said. “Maybe our hearts are in the right place, but I’m starting to think—” ‘Pow!’ “GAH!” Jennifer cried as Pinkie retracted her first once more. Jennifer raised a hand to her nose. “…Never mind let’s tie her back up…” Jean turned to Jennifer. “I don’t know, maybe there’s a nonviolent way to—“ ‘Pow!’ “AAAAAH! Geez! Right in the nose again!” Jean cried as she raised her hands once more. She narrowed her eyes and looked up at Pinkie as she slowly lowered her hands. “Look, we’re trying to be reason—” ‘Pow!’ Jean quickly placed her hands back her nose. “SON OF A… WHY DO YOU KEEP HITTING US!” “BECAUSE YOU KIDNAPPED ME!” Pinkie shrieked back. “HOW IS THIS HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!” “WE’RE TRYING TO HELP YOU!” Jean shot back. “BUT I DON’T NEED OR WANT YOUR HELP!” Pinkie cried. Jennifer sighed and turned to Jean, “Forget it Jean, let’s just rush her and—” ‘Pow!’ “GAH!” “You know,” Pinkie began, “I really thought you two would at least try to block or dodge my fists or something!” “I’m a pacifist,” Jean said. Jennifer knitted her brow and glanced at Jean as she kept her hands firmly planted on her nose. “I don’t think that means you need to just stand there in take getting hit in the face.” “Geez, I really thought after kidnapping me you two would put up more of a fight,” Pinkie said. “I mean… now I’m just sort of beating up defenseless girls in someone’s over-potpourri-scented bathroom.” Jennifer and Jean lowered their hands as they both shot Pinkie indignant looks. Jennifer began to speak, “Defensele—” Jean also spoke up, “Over-Potpourri-scen—” ‘POW!’ ‘POW!’ “AAAH!” Jennifer cried half out in pain, the other half out in frustration. “OW!” Jean cried out, mostly in pain. “What the heck is going on out there?!” Flynn called from down the hall. Jean quickly put her hands in between her face and Pinkie. “We’re handling it, Flynn!” she called back. “What?!” Jennifer cried as she also put her hands up. “How do you figure that?” “Yeah, I’m really confused, too!” Pinkie exclaimed. “I mean, if it’s your plan to have me hit you both in the face until I run out of energy, I have to warn you I have a lot of energy!” Flynn quickly made his way down the hallway and peeked into the bathroom past the two women. “What the heck is going on here?! How did she get free?!” Jennifer rolled her eyes. “Ask Dennis.” Flynn sighed before he called out into the house. “Dennis! Did you untie Pinkie?!” “I’ll tell you for five dollars!” Dennis yelled back. Flynn pulled his lips into a tight frown. “I’ll go get my wallet…” he announced before walking off back down the hallway. “WHAT DOES IT MATTER?!” Jennifer cried out. “SHE’S NOT TIED UP NOW! WE NEED TO SUBDUE HER!” Flynn walked back up to the ladies. “Alright, fine. What do you suggest we do?” “Let’s rush her!” Jennifer cried. Flynn frowned. “But I’m a pacifist!” “Me too!” Jean chimed in. “But you put a chloroform-soaked rag up to her face!” Jennifer reminded. “Well, sure,” Jean replied. “But that’s not the same as attacking her!” Pinkie scrunched her brow. “Uhhh… it kinda is!” Jennifer pointed at Pinkie. “See! Even Pinkie thinks it’s—” ‘POW!’ “OW!” Jennifer exclaimed as she put her hands back over her nose. “Why is it always our noses?!” “Ooo! Good point!” Pinkie exclaimed. She suddenly thrust her fist into Jennifer’s stomach. “Oof…!” Jennifer uttered as the wind was knocked out of her and she doubled over on herself. ‘THUMP!’ Jean’s lips tightened into a worried frown as she glanced at Pinkie through the gaps in her fingers. “Wait! Can’t we talk this ov—” ‘THUMP!’ A pained sounding “Guuff…!” escaped from Jean’s lips as Pinkie also knocked the wind out of her. “Hey!” Flynn cried. “No one hits my soulmate and gets away with it!” Pinkie looked up at Flynn with a blank stare. “But… I already hit her like half a dozen times before that!” Flynn pushed passed the two ladies and stepped into the bathroom, causing Pinkie to pull back a few steps. “Well, I guess you’ll just have to hit m—” ‘POW!’ “AAAH!” Flynn cried out in pain and alarm as he brought his hands up over his nose. “HOW COULD YOU NOT SEE THAT COMING?!” Jean cried in a demanding tone. She held her hands out in front of her defensibly as she glared at Pinkie. “Look, I say we all rush her! I don’t think she can take us all in such a confined space.” Pinkie frowned and backed up further. “Stand back or I’ll… I’ll…” Pinkie frantically searched the room and quickly grabbed a plunger that was sitting next to the toilet and held it in front of her defensively as if she had just picked a sword off the ground. “Don’t make me use this!” she cried. Flynn paused. “She’s got a plunger!” he said in a worried tone. “Ra…RIGHT!” Pinkie cried as she brandished her new weapon. “You were fools to just leave such a dangerous item lying about! Fools I say!” Flynn glanced at his wife.  “What do we do?! We never thought our plumbing devices could be used against us!” Pinkie glanced from side to side nervously. “Ya…YES! And now you shall pay for your tuberous—“ Jennifer rolled her eyes. “‘Hubris’,” she corrected. “—Uh…right!” Pinkie said. “You shall pay for your hubris with… uh… erm…” Pinkie trailed off as she searched for a suitable threat to back up her new weapon. “…PAIN!” “I think we have to risk it!” Jean cried. “But what if we don’t make it?!” Flynn replied. Jennifer shot them both an irritated look. “Would you two calm down?! It’s just a plunger!” Pinkie shot Jennifer a scowl. “YOU’RE just a plunger!” Jennifer pointed an index finger at Pinkie. “Plus, I don’t think she really knows what she’s doing…” she pointed out. Pinkie focused an irritated gaze on Jennifer and suddenly plunged her plunger forward directly into the redhead’s face. “Mmmph! Mmmmmph!” Jennifer cried as she reached for the handle to the plunger and tried to pull it off of her. “Hah! Gotcha!” Pinkie cried. “She’s unarmed!” Jean cried. “Eeep!” Pinkie exclaimed as she withdrew further into the bathroom. She looked around her surroundings and focused her eyes on something on the light-brown-colored bathtub. “Ah-ha!” she cried as she bent down and quickly came back up with a bar of soap. “Keep back or I’ll—WHOA…” The bar of soap quickly slipped up and out of Pinkie’s hand. She scrambled to catch it, flailing her hands about as the slippery item fell to the ground below. “…I did not think any of this through…” Pinkie mused to herself. Jean and Flynn slowly entered the bathroom, closing in on Pinkie. “Now just calm down,” Jean said as she raised her palms in front of her. “We don’t want to hurt you.” Jennifer continued to attempt pulling the plunger of her face.”MMMRRPH!” She dug a set of fingers underneath the rubber suction cup and pried it off her face with a ‘POP!’ revealing a large, red ring around her face.  “Speak for yourself!” she cried as she reached into the plunger and fished out her glasses. Pinkie raised her fists up in front of her face as she took a couple more steps back. “You knoooow~… I took out three armed kids just the other day… I’m pretty sure I can fight my way out of a bathroom against three adults who don’t really know how to fight.” “ULG!” Jennifer cried in frustration. “JUST RUSH HER ALREADY.” Flynn glanced back briefly as he continued slowly approaching Pinkie alongside Jean. “Jennifer, I’m sure there’s a peaceful solution here if we just stop and think a—Whoa, whoa, WHOA!” Flynn cried as he stepped on the soap Pinkie had dropped on the floor. Without warning he lost his balance and fell forward into the bathroom. Pinkie’s eye went wide. “Hey, wait! STOP!” She cried as Flynn unintentionally lunged forward. Before she could think to defend herself, the crown of Flynn’s head collided with Pinkie’s forehead with a solid sounding ‘THUNK!’ before he fell on top of her. Both quickly ended up on the bathroom floor in a heap. Jean and Jennifer quickly exchanged glances before cautiously stepping forward. They leaned down to look at Pinkie who laid face up with a dizzy, glazed over expression on her face as Flynn remained draped over her. “You think it’s safe to grab her?” Jennifer asked. Pinkie suddenly looked up, her eyes focusing on a random bit of the ceiling. “CYBERTRON AND ALL ITS MOONS BELONG TO ME!” she cried. Jean nodded. “I’m guessing she’s still a bit dazed and—” ‘POW!’ “OW!” Jean cried as she reached her hands up to her nose again. From her spot on the ground, Pinkie looked up and snickered. “Flynn?” Jennifer said. Flynn moaned a response, “UuUuUuUuHhhh…?” “Keep her pinned down.” “Uh…” Flynn muttered. Jean and Jennifer quickly exchanged a determined glance and nodded. Pinkie looked between the two women and frowned. “No wai— AH!” she cried as the two women descended upon her. “STOP! OUCH! THIS IS NOT HELPING ME TRUST ANY OF YOU!” she shouted as both women preceded to restrain her. “THIS IS NOT HELPING ME TRUST ANY OF YOU!” -ooo- Pinkie glared out as she sat in a now familiar chair, a chair she once again found herself tied to. “Well… what do we do with her?” Flynn asked the other two ladies in the room. Pinkie blew a gust of air at the tuft of hair the hung in front of her face and looked on sullenly at her kidnappers. “I have some ideas,” she said grumpily. Jennifer scowled over in Pinkie’s direction. “No one’s asking you!” Pinkie sighed, “I thought as much…” “I’m sure we can reach her somehow!” Jean declared. Jennifer sighed and shook her head as she began to speak, “Somehow I knew you’d say that…” “Hey!” Jean said. “We all agreed that we would help her!” Flynn sighed. Jean looked at her soulmate with a frown. “What is it, now?” “Well, it’s just… I guess I was never fully convinced this was a good idea,” Flynn replied. “What?” Jean cried in surprise. “You really thought it was best to just leave her with that maniac?!” “Well, no…” Flynn said trailing off as he searched for a response. “Though, kidnapping and holding her never really seemed like a great way to go about things! I mean… it’s a pretty forceful method to get her to listen to us.” Jennifer scrunched her lips to the side of her mouth. “He’s got a point… I mean… I know we discussed it as a final resort, but our final resort was sure resorted to in a hurry.” “She didn’t give us any choice!” Jean cried out. Jennifer and Flynn turned and looked at each other then back to Jean. “I’m not sure I can agree with that,” Flynn said. Jennifer nodded. “Yeah, you pretty much blew the alarm as soon as she got suspicious!” “But… but… She’s a troubled soul who needs our help!” Jean cried. Flynn looked back at his wife. “She’s a troubled soul who doesn’t want our help!” Pinkie nodded her head up and down vigorously. “It’s true!” “NO ONE FRIGGIN’ ASKED YOU!” Jennifer shot back. Pinkie let out a soft whimper in reply. “Jennifer!” Jean cried in a shocked tone. “WHAT?!” Jennifer cried. “She’s not going to trust us if we keep snapping at her!” Jean said. Jennifer narrowed her eyes. “So far we’ve kidnapped her, tied her up, and ended up restraining and wrestling her back into her chair so we could tie her up again!” she said. “I don’t think she’s ever going to trust us.” Pinkie opened her mouth to speak. Jennifer turned and shot her a glare. Pinkie frowned and closed her mouth. Jennifer turned back towards Jean and returned to the heated discussion. Pinkie sighed to herself as she looked up at the ceiling as the argument raged on next to her. Geez, it’s bad enough they’re keeping me tied to this chair, but do they have to keep on yelling at each other right next to me?! She glanced at the balcony doors as the trio continued the debate regarding what to do with her. Well… if I can’t escape, maybe I can at least get some fresh air! This whole place smells like they burn sandalwood to keep warm! Slowly and quietly, Pinkie pushed off the ground with her feet and scooted the chair and herself closer and closer to the balcony doors. As soon as she reached them, she glanced over at her captors. The three of them were all deep in a heated argument with each other and hadn’t taken noticed of her shift in position. She turned back to the doors and leaned her head down and hooked one of the knobs with the lock of hair that hung in front of her head. Her hair seemed to shift on it’s own accord, turning the knob and opening the door. She pushed her way outside and scooted towards the edge of the balcony. Pinkie sighed as she stared up at the night sky. “Oh Dan, Dan!” she cried. “Wherefore art thou, Dan?” "Wait... Are you lamenting that I'm me?!" a familiar nasally voice called out. Pinkie’s face lit up. “DAN!” she cried excitedly. "Why would I be sad that you're you?! I love you!" “First off, keep your voice down!” Dan cried from below. "Second of all, 'wherefore' means 'why'." “Whoops… sorry and sorry again…” Pinkie said with a sheepish grin. Dan sighed. "Remind me to give you a crash course in early modern English." Dan stood up out of the bushes. “How you holding up, Goofball?” Pinkie frowned. “Oh Dan! It’s terribad, here! Everyone thinks you’re keeping me trapped in some sort of crazy, violent relationship!” “WHAT?!” Dan cried. “That’s insane! You’re not trapped at all!” Pinkie nodded her head up and down vigorously. “I know, right?! They don’t seem to get that I really like our crazy, violent relationship!” There was a soft sigh from the bushes as a feminine voice began to speak. “You know you two don’t have to have a relationship with all the craziness and violence, right?” Dan and Pinkie both knitted their brows and looked at each other. Dan turned towards the bushes next to him and folded his arms. “I honestly don’t think we can.” Pinkie nodded her head up and down. “Yeah, magic talking bush! I mean… if you take away the crazy and the violence we just have… uh…” “A normal, healthy relationship?” the voice suggested. “Bluh!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Yeah! That! Why would we want that?” Dan smiled down at the bush next to him and motioned up at Pinkie. “Merrow!” a cat called out. “MMMPH!” a muffled voice added. Pinkie looked down with a quizzical expression. “Why do Jean and Flynn have a magic talking bush, anyway?” Dan looked back up at Pinkie. “Oh, that was Jason!” he announced with a giant grin. “When he came outside I got the jump on him and made him eat that fake beard of his!” Pinkie knitted her brow. “That didn’t sound like Jason, it sounded like a girl!” “Oh!” Dan bent down and stood back up holding Mr. Mumbles. “It’s Mr. Mumbles!” “Meow!” Mr. Mumbles mewed happily. Dan smiled. “Isn’t she adorable in her tiny breaking and entering getup?” Pinkie nodded her head up and down. “She sure is! But since when does she speak English?” Amber stood up. “Oh! Hiya, Amber!” Pinkie said cheerfully. “Do you know about the magic talking bush?” Amber rolled her eyes. “I am the magic talking bush.” Pinkie inhaled a large volume of air. “You can transform into a talking bush?! That’s amazing!” “No I…” Amber smacked a palm against her face. “We’re here to rescue you…” She paused and quickly glanced to her side. “Well, Dan’s here to rescue you. I’m mostly here to beat up Jean.” Pinkie nodded. “A noble goal. What happened to your face? Are you like… some sort of weird combination of the Joker and Two-Face?”   “That’s what I said!” Dan cried. Amber rolled her eyes. “No! This is just so I don’t end up with a scar after Jean scalded me with hot tea!” Pinkie nodded. “Okay, but you’re missing out on becoming a supervillain~!” she sang out. Dan smiled. “I know, right?!” “Not that she needs it,” Pinkie added. “I mean… she can already turn into a bush… I mean… I haven’t quite figured out how useful that is, but I’m sure there’s some possible use for it…” Amber sighed and shook her head as she began to speak, “You two were made for each other…” Pinkie giggled. “Hehe… Gee, thanks!” “Yeah, thanks!” Dan said. “Meow!” “But I wasn’t…” Amber sighed, “…Nevermind!” She crossed her arms. “Look, while we’re all out here we should figure out another plan to thin the herd a little.” Pinkie stared down at Amber in confusion. “… The herd of what?” Amber raised an eyebrow and turned towards Dan. “How do you work with this?” she asked as she motioned out to Pinkie. Dan shrugged. “I find Pinkie’s not so much a ‘work with’ as a ‘point in the right direction and hope for the best or worst, depending on what we’re hoping to achieve' kind of person.” “WHAT THE HECK IS SHE DOING OUTSIDE?!” Jennifer cried from inside the house. Pinkie, Dan, and Amber all flinched as Dan and Amber quickly went back to hiding in the bushes. “Pinkie,” Dan called out, “see if you can get another one of them to come outside!” “Okay!” Pinkie called back. “MMMP--!” There was a quick rustling in the bushes quickly followed by a soft ‘Thump!’ “—OOFF!” Jason cried, his voice still muffled. “Quiet, you!” Dan said. Jennifer suddenly trudged out onto the balcony, grabbed the back of Pinkie’s chair, and dragged her back inside. Flynn and Jean looked out at Pinkie in concern. “Who were you talking to?” Jennifer said in a suspicious tone. “Uh… Jason!” Pinkie said quickly. The expressions on the trio of kidnappers suddenly softened from concern to relief. Jennifer sighed before she began to speak, “Geez, he must have been really angry if he’s still out there. I wonder what he’s doing.” “Uh…weeping!” Pinkie said as she grinned nervously. Jennifer looked at her with a frown. “Again?! Uhg, I hate it when he gets like this! I better go out and talk to him…” “Oh, let me,” Flynn said. “Maybe I can talk to him man to man.” Jennifer flashed Flynn a quick smile. “Would you?” Flynn nodded. “Sure! No problem! I’m still feeling a bit dizzy from hitting my head, anyways… I can use the air,” he said as he turned and made his way down the hallway. Jean turned to Pinkie. “So, you actually held a conversation with Jason out there?” “Uh… sure!” Pinkie said. Pinkie began to feel uncomfortably warm as Jean and Jennifer watched her. Beads of sweat started to form on her forehead as she desperately figured out something else to say. “He uh… really opened up to me!” she said. “Huh…” Jennifer uttered. “I’m surprised he’d even talk to you after you riled him up the way you did.” “Oh yeah! Totally!” Pinkie said quickly. “He’s was like… a completely different person out there!” “Really?” Jennifer said in an interested tone. Pinkie nodded her head up and down vigorously. “Yep! You might even say Dan attacked him and forced him to eat a fake beard!” “WHAT?!” the two women cried in surprise as they stared down at Pinkie. “Uh… I meant that he’s probably bound and gagged and lying in the bushes right now.” Pinkie frowned. “…Wow, I sure am bad at this…” “HA!” a cry came from outside. Jean and Jennifer glanced towards the balcony door with shocked, alarmed expressions as the sounds of a struggle wafted out from the front lawn. “HUH—AAAAH!” ‘THUMP!’ “OW!” ‘CRACK!’ Jean and Jennifer winced as the sounds of a struggle quickly changed to a one-sided beat down. “AHHH!” Flynn cried. “Not in the face! NOT IN THE FACE!” ‘SMACK!’ “GHA! WHY WOULD YOU HIT ME RIGHT IN THE FACE AFTER I BEGGED YOU NOT TO?!” “BECAUSE I’M RUDE!” Dan’s voice declared. Jean and Jennifer’s expressions turned rageful as they looked down at Pinkie. “What?!” Pinkie said in a protesting tone. “I’m sure he’s fine…” ‘WHACK!’ “OW! SOMEONE HELP!” Flynn cried out. “I’M NOT FINE! I’M NOT FINE AT ALL!” “Oops…” Pinkie said as she looked up at Jean and Jennifer sheepishly.