'One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six...... Six birds sitting on me now. Ah,ah,ah.'
Give me a break, I was bored. I had been bored for the past 7,000 years. If you had been trapped in stone for that long, you'd start to go crazy too.
But perhaps I'm getting ahead of myself...
My name is Chris. Before all this I was a normal teenage human living on earth. I had friends, a job, a family, an overall good life. But now, that's all gone. Now, I'm stuck as a statue in the garden of Canterlot palace as a punishment for my crimes. What did I do to deserve this you wonder? Well except for the destruction of about half of Manehatten and a couple hundred casualties.....absolutely nothing! 'How was I supposed to know about the powers Ares gave me?! How was I supposed to know that he would drop me in the middle of a world that was ruled by two supreme deities that could destroy my face?! How did he know about my anger management problems!?' I had begun to get angry. 'No! Anger bad! Get angry and Luna will put another sleep spell on me. And I missed 3000 years of events because of the first one! If there was one thing I hated, it was being left out of the picture.
I began to gradually calm myself down and think more logically, if anything was to reduce my anger, it was thinking.
'Well Ares is a god....,
The sound of giggling interrupted my thoughts. I looked around carefully, wondering who this mysterious laughter belonged to. It turned out to be multiple fillies and a few colts gathered as part of a Ponyville Elementary field trip, led once again by Miss Cheerilee. My hopes began to rise. Starting four years ago, every year that this class had come to take a tour of the palace, one of the poor souls entombed in these statues had been set free. First Discord, than Vengence (who surprisingly looked a lot like Nemesis from Resident Evil), Combat (Gilgamesh), and finally that goof-ball Cunning, or Solaire as he called himself. All had been given a second chance in the world. Unfortunately, those fools had all screwed up and returned here as statues thanks to the 'Elements of Harmony'.
I would be more careful. No, as a matter of fact, I didn't intend to return as a statue.
No, I had been one far too long for that.
I watched carefully as the the students and their teacher walked closer, eventually stopping in front of me.... but they didn't look at me. Instead they stared at the statue across the row from me and began to discuss the vice of Greed.
'Oh Celestia, if he gets out before me, I swear...'
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"Miss Cheerilee, what's that statue behind us?"
I had tried my best to tune out the many questions about the evil banker-looking statue that had gotten asked, but this one got my attention as it actually pertained to me. I focused on the filly that had asked it. She was yellow with a red mane, a large pink bow in her hair, and the cutest southern accent you could ask for.
'D'awwwwwww'
"That, Applebloom, is the statue of rage, or uncontrollable anger." Miss Cheerilee said, nodding towards me.
The young ones stared at me. I had been wearing samurai-style armor at the time (minus the helmet), my face was scrunched up like I was trying to read really small print in a book, and I had a hand shielding my eyes, as if I was looking out at the horizon. This was because when I had fallen to the elements of harmony, there was a lot of bright light so it was hard to see. I would say that I looked like an ancient Japanese pioneer. Oh yeah, my new name here is Rage, if you haven't figured it out already.
"It looks super ugly, no wonder the princesses turned it to stone." proclaimed a snobbish voice. 'Oh no.'
"Well actually Diamond Tiara, that's not the reason he was imprisoned." Miss Cheerilee replied.
'I'll never understand how she can sound so happy when dealing with that brat.'
"Well it should have been." Diamond Tiara sniffed. "I mean, look at how it's dressed, and its face is hideous!"
'Shut up kid! Don't push it' I was struggling to control my anger. It's amazes me that I still can't control myself after seven millennia.
"I mean, clearly it's a mistake that needed to be eradicated permanently."
'Oh that....is.....It! I began to struggle inside my stone prison.
Now I know it was just Diamond Tiara being Diamond Tiara, and I should have ignored it, but, like I said before, I have anger issues. And it doesn't take very much to set me off.
*Crack*
'???'
*Crack**Crack*
'Really, was that it? I had been trapped in here...for 7000 f***ing years.....and all it took....was for a little f***ing brat....to insult me.....in order to f***ing free myself? Does anyone know how ............unbelievably..............'
"I am f***ing done with this!" I yelled. I began to grow, causing more and more stone to fall off of me.
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No doubt you're confused, so let me explain my powers.
Normally, I stand around 6 feet tall, but when I get angry I'm like the Hulk. The angrier I get, the bigger, stronger, and more powerful I get. Having broken free from my stone prison, I towered over the fillies and their teacher at 7 feet tall, with a shoulder width of 3 feet.
I stared down at them, extreme anger plastered on my face. I searched for the one who had insulted me. I found the brat sniffling in fear in the middle of the group. As soon as my eyes locked onto her, she screamed, "No please! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"
Man, the internal struggle was real.
"You better be." I growled.
Diamond Tiara sniffed again and began to nod her head at sonic speeds.
Against my better judgement, I tried to calm down and began to shrink back down to my regular form. When my normal size had been reached, I turned my attention back to the class, who were staring at me with wide eyes. "Go on, get outa here." I said waving my hand in a shooing gesture. I didn't need to tell them twice. They charged away screaming and crying for the guards. Speaking of which, I needed to leave before sun-butt and lunar-flank got here. I turned and began to head towards the palace gates, hoping I wouldn't meet much opposition.