//------------------------------// // My first and last day of school. // Story: the world beyond // by steeperswine //------------------------------// I woke up in Twilight's library. Celestias sun was shining, all was peace and quiet. I got up and went down stars. I sat down at the table waiting for breakfast. Twilight comes in with breakfast and said "here's breakfast! I hope you like it!" When I looked at my food it had the following ingredients. toast, GOOD lettuce, GOOD daisy and hay, BAD "What the fuck is this shit?" I said pointing at the daisy and hay. "What, what is it?" Twilight said confused. "Sorry if you don't know but humans don't eat DAISES or HAY!" "Well i'm sorry but what do humans eat?" "OK, lettuce=good, toast=good but the others. Bad. I suggest egg and bacon instead." "OK" said twilight writing notes and said "we have eggs here but one question what is bacon?" I look at her in a deadpan way and said in a deadpan voice "bacon comes from pigs, and its a meat." She stops writing and said "so Human's eat meat? well i'm sorry but we do not eat meat and so should you." "Fine" I said and started to head out the door. "I don't mind going vegetarian for a while." Then a purple aura picked me up and pulled me over back to Twilight. "You are not going anywhere until after school." said Twilight. "OH NO PLEASE I BEG YOU" I pleaded. "Nope" she responded as she was dragging me to school with her purple aura. Here I am in school, learning. Around a bunch of five year olds. while I was in class a yellow pony next to me with a bow in her hair asks "are you new here?" I look at her and respond in a sarcastic voice "why yes I am I thought no one will noticed!" "Oh yea your the one that applejack was talking about. Hi i'm her sister Applebloom." I sighed and said "hi i'm Leonardo but just call me Leo." "please to meet ya." she replied. "hello everypony" said a purple pony with a flower and a smile in the middle tattoo on her rear end. "Hello miss Cheerilee!" said everybody in the classroom, well except for me. "It looks like we have a new student today! please welcome Leo to the class." said miss Cheerilee Everyone was clapping, but not just any type of clap, more like stomping on the table. "Leo can you please come out the front and tell us where you are from?" "Alright" I said in a evil voice. This is going to be fun. one of the ponies raised there hoof and asked "Where did you used to live?" "easy, I used to live in a planet called earth, until what happened." "What happened?" said the class in interest. "the world I used to live in was destroyed by the death star." "Oh no" said the class "who did it?" "A man called Hitler. He wanted to destroy all of the teletubbies and he used a death star to destroy them." "OK" said one of the students. "do u have a family?" "Of cause I do we are called the sons of anarchy!" Then another student said "how was your world made?" "Naturally" I said "na just kidding a hippi got his bong and summoned a genie and wished for happiness." "OK last question, when was the last time you showered?" "DIAMOND TIARA!" yelled the teacher. "Its OK tech, I'll answer" I said in a evil voice again "Well ms tiara I couldn't because a few weeks ago I was drinking and woke up with a old guy next to me in a bath tub and I couldn't use it because the old guy was. So I took a hike and got stabbed by a gorilla eating a banana and he grabbed me and throw me to north america. So I bungee jumped without the cord back to Australia and went home. Any questions?" No one spoke a word because they where trying to find out about what happened just then. "OK class" said the teacher breaking the silence, "today we are going to do some maths!" "Oh no" I thought. I was terrible at maths and hope it was easy. "Okay everypony the first question is... what is 130 + 300 =" OH SHIT I don't know that one! Think, Think, Think! Then a pony with a tattoo with a silver spoon said "The answer is 430." "Correct Silver spoon" said miss Cheerilee the teacher "Thank you," she said and then laughed and said "I bet the new guy didn't know!" I whispered "Faggot" "Leo" said Cheerilee "can you answer the next question?" "Of cause" I responded "Whats 230 x 686 = to? my face suddenly dropped and I started to think really hard. I can see that everyone in the class doesn't know it as well. "errrrr" I said and then I realized back at the library when I mind readied Twilight, maybe I can do it to her?" "The answer is 157,780!" everyone in the class went silent and the teacher said "that is correct!" "Now next one, What is 547 x 346 = to? "189,262!" I responded "correct and last one, what is..." "145,790,652!" I interrupted She looks at me shocked and surprised "That is correct. You answered my questions even when I am still saying it that is AMAZING!" After she spoke everyone went silent and then we heard the bell "OK everypony it's recess!" I sat down on a bench not eating anything because Twilight also made a daisy sandwich Applebloom and her three friends walked up to me and said "Hi, we are the Cutie Mark Crusaders!" "The what now?" I asked. "Cutie Mark Crusaders!" said Applebloom "but you can call us the CMC's." "And may I ask what are they?" I replied. "The CMC's are a group that finds a ponies special talent!" I look at them in confusion and said "I don't get it." They start to look at each other and said "you know? Cutie mark!" I look at them and said "listen I am not interested into joining your cult." "But it's not a cult! In a way, but a cutie mark is the mark on the back of there flank and that represents there one and only talent." I listen as they continue "so if they have a hammer as there cutie mark then it could mean that they are great at building or something." "So you guys help ponies who DON'T have a cutie mark" I respond. "Eyep" said a white one. "Hang on what are your names?" I responded. "Oh" said Applebloom "this is Sweetie Bell" pointing to a white unicorn, "and this is Scootaloo" pointing to the orange Pegasus. "So why you come to me?" I ask "Well we didn't see that you had a cutie mark. So we just wanted to help you because back at class Silver bell was teasing you because you didn't have a cutie mark." said Sweetie Bell I just stood there looking at them and said "my kind can't get cutie marks. So there is no point of her to tease me. Well I THINK that was teasing." "WHAT" they said "YOU CAN'T GET A CUTIE MARK" "Eyep" I said. "Then how do you know what your talent is." "Easy we just know" I said "So you already have a talent?" "Yes" I said "And I will prove it to you." I pulled out three knifes (yes I know no knifes at school but just in case of another invasion I had to), and throw them at a tree. All three stuck in, next I ran and did a front flip grabbing the three knifes in mid air, next I chucked the knifes to my left hitting an apple a pony was holding and to my right hitting the mane of Applebloom not hitting her skull. Then I climbed up to the roof of the school and jumped down doing a commando roll and in mid roll throwing the knife in front of me hitting a massive overgrown spider. As I got up I said "ta daaaa." As I looked around everyone was hiding I turned around and saw the massive spider and said "can I have my knife back please?"