//------------------------------// // Read It (Starring Cheese Sandwich!) // Story: Robot Scootaloo // by alarajrogers //------------------------------// CHEESE SANDWICH appears on stage, with accordion. Backup singers behind him are Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy and Zecora. On other instruments, the backup band consists of Octavia on fiddle, Vinyl Scratch on soundboard, Lyra Heartstrings on piano, and the Cutie Mark Crusaders trying and failing to get their cutie marks on drums. CHEESE (dancing as he plays accordion): How come you're always such a fussy young brony You're so picky 'bout the fanfics from My Little Pony Well don't you know that authors get to feeling kinda lonely So read it Just read it PINKIE, FLUTTERSHY AND ZECORA: Ooo! Don't wanna argue I don't wanna debate Don't wanna hear about what kind of fics you hate Karma's gonna get you if you don't bother to rate So read it Just read it CHEESE (scowls into camera): Don't you tell me it sucks! CHEESE, PINKIE, FLUTTERSHY AND ZECORA: Just read it, read it, read it, read it Find an author's ego and feed it Have some more random starring the Pie (PINKIE waves arms wildly) It doesn't matter if the grammar makes you cry Just read it, read it, read it, read it CHEESE: Your reading manners are just awful! Hot damn, You haven't even left a single comment, man How can you be so cold if you call yourself a fan? Go read it Just read it You better listen, cause I don't wanna scold So many stories out there that just gotta be told Just remember how much you sucked when you yourself were twelve years old So read it Just read it PINKIE, FLUTTERSHY AND ZECORA: Now! CHEESE, PINKIE, FLUTTERSHY AND ZECORA: Just read it, read it, read it, read it Set a comment quota and meet it Have some more grimdark, have some more HiE Even if the wall'o'text makes you wanna die Just read it, read it, read it, read it Don't you make me repeat it Read Alicorn OCs, read Gary Stu It doesn't matter if the plot smells like poo Just read it read it read it read it Read it read it read it read it (CHEESE and PINKIE dance, CHEESE playing the accordion still, PINKIE performing a kazoo solo) CHEESE, PINKIE, FLUTTERSHY AND ZECORA: So read it, read it, read it, read it Stick your butt into a chair and seat it Read about background ponies, read about the Mane 6 There's nowhere else better to get your pony fix So read it, read it, read it, read it Read it read it read it read it TWILIGHT (disapprovingly): That's all very well and good, but ninety percent of all fanfics totally suck. CHEESE: Ninety percent of everything sucks! Just read it! (PINKIE and CHEESE toss fanfics at TWILIGHT, who desperately tries to catch all of them with her magic and read them all, as they dance around her singing) Come on, read it, read it, read it, read it Don't you make me repeat it (Oh Celestia!) Have some crossovers, have Five Score By Four Have some clopfics, then go surfing for more Just read it read it read it read it Read it read it read it read it fwwwt