Most Stereotypical Fanfic Ever!!!!11!one!1

by DecadantHandshake


Stereotypicalness is equal to or greater than yes

One night, Luna snuck into Celestia's bedroom and stole her Rule 63 gun and shot Celestia with it. Fun time quickly ensued. And thus, Shadowcrusher9001 was born. He is a black and red OC with a troubled past. This is his story. When Celestia...oops, I mean Luna, gave birth to Shadow, she immediatly knew he was destined to suck, so she donated him to a tribe of timberwolves. He hunted with the wolves in the forest until he was four years old. Then, his parent timberwolves were killed by a pack of timberwolves. That pack of timberwolves were his parent timberwolves. And so he was orphaned, walking through the forest for thousands of years. When he finally found his way out, Luna had been banished and had returned and was Nightmare moon. When he finally found his way out after those thousands of years, he was eighteen years old, perfectly logical. He walked out of the forest and towards Ponyville, and muttered the first few words he had ever spoken in hundreds of years.
"...I ARE TEH PWNZER!" And with these amazingly incomprehensible words, he strode towards Ponyville, his really stupid and overly flamboyant red and black tail dragging behind him. You may be wondering why I haven't told you more about his time in the forest, but that is because this is a challenge for you. I want you to go to every stupid Red and Black Alicorn OC story out there, and copy and paste the characters backstory into one Microsoft word document, and then add it into the area of the story where his backstory would be. Whatever you get, accept it as fact.
He strode up to Twilights library, somehow knowing who she was, probably explained in the backstory you made for him, and knocked on her door. She immediately answered, like in all fanfics, instead of taking a few minutes like people in real life do.
"Twilight, I am now the seventhest Elemental of Harmonation." Twilight gazed at him, the writer of this story not sure how she should respond.
"Wafflebuckets!" She announced, feeling confident that this was the correct answer.
"Indeed. Fare the well under these troubled skies, McJiggles." And so he left, and Equestria was safe once more, thanks to THE POWERPUFF GIRLS! I think the writer of the story forgot to say what time of day it was, so lets say it was night in some parts of ponyville, and day in other parts. In the market, which was a day part, Applejack was setting up her stand, trying to make money to afford her granny's alzheimer's medicine. ShadowCrusher9001 walked up to her, and shouted.
"Worst pony!" And then walked away. She stood there, contemplating whether or not to respond.
aFTER WAITING FOR A, oops, caps lock, response, Shadowcrusher9001 left her stand and went to find Rarity. Now, as in alot of really stupid stories, Rarity is a total slut and ends up throwing her hands... er... hooves all over the Red and Black OC. I don;t know whether or not a Black and Red OC would have sex with her or not, so lets make it a dual universe thing. In the first universe he does it, and in the second one he doesn't. In the first universe, he contracts Super Aids from Rarity and dies, but he didn't die in the second one so we will have to fix that. Oh My God! I just realized I have been speaking in the same tense the entire story. I need to make more grammar errors, or this won't count as a really stupid story. Now, he doesn't not want to go see something that isn't Fluttershy, but he got there before tomorrow so we will show it. Okay, thats all the stupidity I can muster, I am going to indent now and take a break.
Okay, the writer is back, now more stupidity, (he didn;t really leave the keyboard). Oh hey, he made a mistake in that one sentence and put a ; instead of a '. Oh well, he isn't in the mood to fix it. He does go to see Fluttershy, and see her does he does. And she and him lived happily ever after. Yayzors. Oh wait, that is only 723 words, and this story needs 1000. Interesting. Whatever should be put in to the story to fix this extremely common and easy to fix problem. One can only wonder. Maybe the writer can babble on about stuff, or maybe he should add on to the story. Oh yes, I think I know the solution.
The Alicorn OC then went to see the ROY G BI-Sexual, who was sleeping in that big ass house of hers. He got there, and made her a boy. Now she could have all the mares she wanted, and it was all thanks to Shadowcrusher9001, who then changed himself into a girl so they could have fun times. Yayzors. The ending. Gah fuck! This story only has 862 words, what the hell man? What else should I put here? I went to Twilights... Rarities... I mean Rarity's... Applejacks... Hehe, Applejack is the name of a alcoholic drink... Fluttershy's... Oh yeah, there is Pinkie Pie... How did the writer forget about his favorite pony? Oh well, time for some cupcake playoffs!
Shadowcrusher9001 walked into the bakery for some reason, this one was at night time. Pinkiepie was in Pinkamena mode, and she killed him to death. And so the story finally developed a sense of logic. The grammar now is orderly, and the writer is content with himself. If only he could go back and fix grammar mistakes without ruining the stupidity of the story. Oh well, hopefully the administrator who reads this will allow it to pass for the sake of spitting in the face of stupidity by culturing it. Oh hey, I still need eight more words. Hmm... Hopefully these eight words or more will do it.