//------------------------------// // Chapter Six- "Pone Home" // Story: The Incredible Happening of Golden Gates // by totallynotabrony //------------------------------// “Chrissy?!” Sonya yelled. “Chrissy?!” Welch gasped. “Chrissy?!” Leon cried. “Who’s Chrissy?” Dusty asked. It was a valid question, but more important was maintaining the fusilade of plushies on the kidnappers who were loading their friends into the trunk of a car without being shot. Nicole looked rather displeased.  It wasn’t the first time that day she’d been held against her will.  Golden, or perhaps Chrissy, struggled against her captors but was stuffed in the trunk before she could break free. The changelings took off, dodging the rest of the way down Lombard Street.  Through copious maneuvering and quite a bit of sheer luck, screeching tires and more than a few colorful swears, Dusty managed to navigate his truck through the giant obstacle that was the street without significant incident, putting his foot to the floor to continue the chase. At the bottom of the hill, the road leveled out again and merged back with 101.  The road was straight for several blocks before twisting through the parks and trees of the Presidio and passing through the Battery Park tunnels.  The changelings kept the throttle flat out, cutting through traffic like crazy.  The bronies in pursuit kept up, throwing everything they had into their assault, both literally and figuratively.  Plushies, trash, and whatever junk was in the back of the truck pounded on the changeling cars as Dusty attempted to ram them with the truck’s heavy front bumper. The road curved gently north.  From beyond the trees, International Orange girders and thick steel cables came into view.  It was the bridge.  If Golden wasn’t so locked in the trunk, she might have marveled at the iconic San Francisco landmark. “We’ve got to stop them before they get across the bridge!” Sonya shouted.  “Once they get to the interstate they could go anywhere, even Oakland!” “Why Oakland specifically?” Leon asked. “Do you want to go to Oakland?” Fortunately, that didn’t come to pass.  As the ramp to the bridge loomed, the truck put an extra hard push against the closest changeling car, sending it crashing sideways into the other.  Both spun sideways across the road ahead, blocking access to the bridge span. The truck slid slid to a stop, several car lengths short of the improvised barrier.  The staff jumped out, just as the lid of the trunk prison flew off with a wrench of metal. A very pissed-looking Queen Chrysalis hovered out of the trunk, a few yellow feathers falling away. Everyone - staff, changelings, passing pedestrians - looked on in shock.  It wasn’t every day that the tallest, queeniest, most powerful changeling appeared in San Francisco.  Having a crowd of changelings chase her out of the convention center and halfway across the city was highly unusual, but the most mind-shattering revelation of all was the true identity of the pony they’d become friends with. Well, that and the fact that Chrissy had taken Nicole hostage again. She pulled the woman out of the trunk and hauled her towards the bridge railing.  Hooves gripped around Nicole’s neck, Chrysalis called to the approaching changelings.  “I swear I’ll do it!” “Like we care about her,” the changeling holding the gun snarled. “Plan B!” Chrysalis shouted.  She and Nicole sprinted for the cover of the truck.  The gun-toting changeling opened fire and the others swapped back to their natural form for the benefit of launching bolts of magic. The staff huddled behind the truck with Chrissy and Nicole as bullets of lead and magic hammered the other side.  Glass shattered and tires flattened. “Well, this didn’t turn out like we planned at all,” Chrissy muttered. “You two planned this?” Sonya asked. “Well, we did spend a few minutes in a trunk together planning,” Chrissy replied. “Among other things,” Nicole added with a grin, using her most perfect Celestia voice. “Er, we should probably do something about this situation,” said Chrissy, dodging that subject. Nicole nodded.  Then she changed into a tall alicorn with a spotless white coat and the prettiest pastel mane. “Wait, if you’re here, then where’s Nicole Oliver?” demanded Sonya. “We paid good money for a VIP appearance!” “Well, she could be Nicole Oliver,” Leon speculated. “But Nicole Oliver does the voice for Cheerilee, too,” argued Welch. “Uh, we’ve got bigger problems,” Dusty broke in. Celly and Chrissy shared a glance and then stepped out from behind cover, both of their horns charging. The first car blew up in a fireball, its gas tank exploded by a high-powered charge of magic.  The second was merely lifted from the ground and crushed like a soda can before being unceremoniously dropped.  Changelings scattered everywhere, their cover destroyed and the fear of nonspecific deities in their hearts. The two of them walked forward, horns blazing like a green and yellow laserlight show.  Changelings were knocked off their hooves and out of the air by punishing stun spells.  Within mere seconds, the whole bridge was clear. Pausing to make sure of their work, the two leaders turned to face each other.  As one, they cast a spell to the heavens, a blanket of mixed magic sweeping down over the city to vacuum up any changeling left behind and punt them out of San Francisco.  They even took the ones in Oakland. The light of the spell died down as every changeling finished being banished from Earth.  Chrysalis and Celestia gave each other a simultaneous brohoof without looking.  They turned and came back to where the staff had watched, wide-eyed. “Well, that’s that,” Celestia exclaimed.  “Nice to meet you all.  Now, where did I leave my portal…?” She walked over to the edge of the bridge and looked down.  “Aha.  Well, so long all of you.”  She waved a hoof and disappeared over the edge. *** “And that is why, dearest sister, we believe you should give up cake for the next…” There was a loud rumbling, and the vaulted dome high above the sisters’ heads began to glow and distort. Luna backed away nervously from the frothing portal that had formed above her. Celestia continued to wear her indefatigable poker-face. Suddenly, the warping ceiling pulsed violently, then disintegrated. A haggard alicorn tumbled down, along with several thousand gallons of saltwater, which quickly flooded the throne room to several inches. The second Celestia collapsed upon the now flooded floor, sputtering and coughing. After a few moments of regaining her composure, this doppelganger looked up at the petrified princess of the night and grinned. “Hi Luna!” Luna was gobsmacked. Her head swiveled rapidly between the two Celestias, the one sitting regally upon the throne, and the one splayed awkwardly on the floor. She tried to form words, but it was some time before more than squeaks escaped her slack jaw. “I-I-I...b-but…but?... Hwah?” she cried. Celestia number two stood up and shook her mane out with a vigorous flick of the head. She trotted around Luna and over to the seated Celestia, beginning to giggle. When she reached the throne, she stuck a for leg out. “Hoofbump? /)” “Brohoof (\,” the twin answered, completing the equine handshake of sorts. Their mutual sister finally snapped. “TIA! WE DEMAND THE MEANING OF THESE SHENANIGANS! WHY ARE THERE TWO OF YOU! I ONLY HAVE ONE SISTER! YOU,” she roared, pointing at the Celestia standing in a briny puddle, “MUST BE AN IMPOSTER!” Angered at being on the receiving end of one too many pranks, Luna reared up into the air and charged a beam of magic intended for the waterlogged pony. “EAT KIMCHI, CHANGELING!” she screamed, firing the spell with murderous precision. Quick as a flash, Celestia threw up a shimmering gold force field, and the spell careened into the shield. The field held, and the beam instantly reflected wildly off it towards the ceiling. The incantation bounced chaotically between columns and walls, knocking over several vases and producing sparks in its wake. After what seemed to be many seconds of mad ricocheting, the spell flew right at the Celestia seated on the throne, producing a terrified expression upon the face of the unintended target. The Princess screamed, soon glowing as white as the sun. The two other ponies in the room looked on agast, each shielding their eyes from the glare with a fetlock. Finally, the light died down, revealing... ...a buck-naked Nicole Oliver sitting awkwardly on the throne. For the record, Celestia thought it was hilarious. *** Back on the bridge, the sirens of emergency vehicles were already sounding in the distance.  An additional group of staff and other bronies who had been field-promoted to the position had arrived and encircled the scene. Sonya was busy trying to organize the group.  More kept arriving all the time.  It was as if all the convention attendees had decided to relocate to the bridge. At some point, Chrissy had slipped away.  Sonya wasn’t sure how she had done that, but changeling shapeshifting powers may have been a factor. “What are we doing here?” Bryan asked. “Well, the the convention hall has been ruined,” Sonya said.  “Besides, we’ve got a crime scene here.”  She gestured to the burning car. “Looks like a bonfire to me,” Phillip said. “And we’re here with all our friends,” Skandranon pointed out. “Well, that doesn’t make it a party by any-” “Hey everyone!  We’re going to have a party!” shouted a random eavesdropper.  A tremendous roar of approval went through the still-growing crowd. Sonya paused, but found herself agreeing.  It wasn’t like the bridge could be used for traffic at the moment anyway.  They might as well make the most of it.  Get some fresh air, hang out with some cool people, talk about ponies.   It just might have been the most memorable convention anyone anywhere had ever attended.