//------------------------------// // Herrings and the Beautiful Farm Mares Who Paint Them Red // Story: Appledashery // by Just Essay //------------------------------// Rainbow Dash flew and flew and flew. Sweating in the noonday light, she flew so low over the hilltops bordering Sweet Apple Acres that she lopped off several swaths of grass. Flowers bent beneath her beating wings as she glided murderously quick towards the gate of the farmland's front fence. In her quivering vision, she made out a singular orange shape, and she throttled directly towards it. "Applejack! Hold up!" Panting, wheezing, Rainbow Dash touched down, skidding to a stop until she nearly plowed into the farm mare. "I... c-came as quickly as I-I heard..." She gulped, gulped again, and stammered. "What is it?! What's wrong?! How can I help—" "I said git!" Applejack snarled, bucking at a nearby tree. Several brown, mushy apples fell to the ground with sick thuds. The air immediately filled with angry squeaks and the flapping of leather wings. "H-huh?!" Rainbow Dash glanced up through pulsing eyes. Several large bats with glistening fangs and wretched scowling expressions flew off the tree and towards another, where they proceeded to munch and suck liberally from the delicious red apples hanging there. "Ohhhhhhh..." Applejack snarled, her freckled cheeks red with anger. "For Pete's sake! Dun make me fetch Granny's ol' boomstick and show you what-for!" She galloped over and bucked the next tree. With shrill hisses, the bats took off and parted ways, flying towards the far ends of the orchards. "Ah, now that's just great!" Applejack snarled, tossing her hat down with a growl. "Now them varmints are all over the place! Nnnnnngh! I'm gonna have to fetch Fluttershy again. Darn it." Rainbow Dash gulped, then stammered. "AJ...?" The farm mare jumped, her ears pricking skyward. In an orange blur, she swooped up her hat and slapped it tightly over her head. "Land's sakes!" Clearing her throat, she spun about and smiled awkwardly. "Rainbow! Since when did you get here?" She pawed at the ground with a jittering hoof. "I... uh... I'm sorry that you had to hear all that just now. I like to think that I'm a mare with a sound temper, but these gul-durn vampire fruit bats just push my buttons somethin' awful, and... and..." She blinked, then squinted at Rainbow. "Are you alright, sugarcube?" Rainbow heaved and heaved and heaved and smiled. "Totally!" Her voice cracked through two octaves, and she breathlessly winced at herself. "I-I just... uhm..." "Awwww shucks. You flew all the way here, didn't ya?" Applejack chuckled at herself, then fiddled with the golden end of her blonde ponytail. "Whallop my wither. Yer more breathless than you were during the Iron Pony Competition. Shoot, I sure didn't mean to give you such a fright." Freckles swam in a red-orange sea. "I'm awful sorry, darlin'..." Rainbow Dash's eyes swam in Applejack's flushed expression. "I... forgive... everypony..." "Really, it ain't nothin' that I can't handle," Applejack said, hanging her head with a sigh. "But darn if it doesn't get me all worked up! Each year, these fruit-suckin' critters come to our farm and our farm alone to wreak havoc. Without fail! And it gets worse and worse every season!" She glanced worriedly over the treetops where several leathery bodies could be seen darting from branch to branch. "Now that we've got a new rich client payin' out the ear for our harvest, it's really rotten timin' for the vampire fruit bats to be visitin' us again." "That's really terrible, AJ." Rainbow Dash gulped, finally catching her breath. "But, seriously, fruit bats? I've seen you ride on the back of a wild manticore without fear. Don't tell me that these little guys are giving you a hard time!" "They ain't no threat to me or my kin, Rainbow," Applejack said in a snarling tone. "It's my crops that they're after! And I can't very well chase 'em all down on my lonesome! Not with the whole Acres for them varmints to find places to hide!" Rainbow blinked, her jaw wide with a sudden smile. "Hey! Why not get some help with a pony who knows a thing or two about speed?!" "Fluttershy's pretty good at talkin' sense into even the nastiest of pests, but I can't rightly say she'd be fast at doin' it." Rainbow Dash hovered in place, arms folded. "Really, AJ? I mean... really?" Applejack turned and looked at her, blinking. Her ears folded back. "You? Oh, sugarcube, that's awful nice of you to offer, but—" "But what?" "Well... erm..." Applejack fidgeted. "These bats ain't exactly easy to scare. No doubt yer faster than lightning, but tryin' to deal with all of these nasty-nasties at once? It ain't easy to get me in a fussin' mood, and yet I burn up somethin' fierce when I so much as think about these thangs. Celestia knows what they'd do to you—" "Pfffft! And just what is that supposed to mean?!" Rainbow Dash frowned. "Erm..." Applejack leaned back, chuckling breathily. "Well... uh... ya certainly ain't one to back down from a challenge, I reckon..." "Right!" Rainbow smirked. "So let me at 'em! I bet I can find a way to scare 'em off!" "Oh, Rainbow. Let's be real for a minute here. You don't have to. Goddess knows you've got far more important things to deal with." "Applejack..." "Besides, ya already volunteered to help me with the apple buckin' a few weeks ago. No sense in makin' you sweat over my troubles anymore—" "Applejack, look at me." Rainbow Dash flew down to the earth pony's level. Her ruby eyes narrowed. "There is nothing more important." "But—" "Nothing." Applejack's green eyes reflected a frowning face. She slowly, slowly nodded her head. "Reckon I aim to believe ya, darlin'." She gulped. "My oh my... if loyalty weren't yer strong suit, than perhaps stubbornness would fit the bill." She smirked. "Back at ya, girl." Rainbow Dash cracked the joints in her neck. "So, where's a good place for me to start flying so I can hunt these suckers down?" "They seem to like hangin' out by the south field the most." "Right." Rainbow Dash soared skyward. "I'm on it like comet vomit!" "Rainbow, wait!" Applejack waved a hoof. "Wouldn't ya... er... I dunno..." "What?!" Rainbow Dash stared down, blinking. "You seem to be carryin' an awful lot of junk there. Wouldn't ya feel better leavin' yer saddlebag on my front porch or somethin' while you do yer flyin' thang?" "I... uhm..." Rainbow Dash squirmed in midair, feeling the weight of the stone horn in her satchel. "I-I'm good to go! Believe me!" "Ya sure?" "Yeah. I'm... uh... carrying all of this stuff because... I-I need exercise!" "...exercise." "Yeah! Gotta lose some weight, y'know?" Applejack looked Rainbow's petite body up and down. "If you insist, sugarcube..." She winced slightly. "Right. Oh... uhm... one quick thing, Applejack." "What's that?" Rainbow squinted. "Granny Smith owns a boomstick?" Applejack bit her lip, then stared off into the horizon. "Yes? No?" "I want to scare the varmints off, Rainbow, but that doesn't mean I wanna hurt them," Applejack said. "I was doin' what any good card player would do if she didn't want to reveal her hoof at the table." Rainbow raised an eyebrow. "You were bluffing?" "Pretty much, yup." "Heh... okay then. But AJ?" "Yeah, Rainbow?" The pegasus winked. "A pony with the Element of Honesty really sucks at bluffing." And she darted off in a prismatic blur. "Hrmmmff..." Applejack kicked at the dirt before galloping after Rainbow's distant figure. "Friggin' smart feathers..." Shey may or may not have been smirking.