The ticking of the clock echoed in the otherwise silent room as it had been for the last half hour. It was mid morning but the two ponies who occupied the room had been up since dawn. Sunrise sat on the exam bed with Twilight sitting beside her. Occasionally Sunrise would nervously rub the casts which covered her hind legs and Twilight would repeatedly check the time.
“He said it would only take twenty minutes. What could be taking so long to get the results?” Twilight said anxiously as she resisted the urge to begin pacing. Sunrise put a reassuring hoof on her shoulder and smiled.
“Twilight, you're more nervous than I am. Doctors are busy ponies, I'm sure he's going as fast as he can.”
“I know but it's irresponsible to give an estimate of time like that. Besides, how are you not worried? What if you're not healing properly? What if my magic only made things worse? I've never done a healing spell on a pony before. What if I messed up? I...”
“Twilight, I'm calm because I know how good you are with magic and how well you've taken care of me. Am I worried? Yeah, a little, but I know if it's bad news it wont be your fault. When the doctor walks through that door and gives us good news we'll just feel silly getting all worked up. Let's take a deep breath and relax. There's nothing we can do about it until we know what the scan says so let's' just stay calm, okay?” Twilight gave a small sigh then smiled up at Sunrise and took her hoof in hers.
“You're right, panicking wont get us anywhere. Thanks Sunrise.”
“I should be thanking you. If you were nervous much longer I don't know how long I could have stayed calm. I definitely wouldn't be this calm if you were in the waiting room.” The couple smiled at each other, expressions of worry replaced with warmth and happiness. It's taken so much to get here, but now I'm here with Twilight, she knows my feelings and even reciprocates them. So much happened last night. I made new friends in Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle, and reconciled with Spike. Now Twilight and I are happy together and today.. I'll find out if I'll be able to start physical therapy so I can walk again. Her eyes beamed with happiness and relief. She felt like she triumphed over all the suffering and this was her reward. She basked in the feeling for only a few euphoric minutes before her mind brought itself back to reality and the good feelings were replaced with unsettling knowledge. It's not over yet. Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy still haven't spoken to Twilight and are all suffering the loss of Rainbow Dash. Not only that but I may not be able to go through therapy yet and even more pressing is the decision I have to make about my wings. I don't know if I can do it all. I want to help Twilight's friends, I want them to become my friends. I may have been able to help Scootaloo and Pinkie Pie but that doesn't mean I can do the same for the others...
“Sunrise? Are you alright?” Twilight asked, noticing the downcast look overtake Sunrise's face. Sunrise's eyes widened, realizing that she let her face betray her doubts and fears.
“No.. I guess I'm a little overwhelmed by everything that still needs to be done. And then there's the matter of my wings...” She trailed off, retracting back to her thoughts. Great, now I've made her worry. I know what I just said about not letting these things get to us but, well, I guess it's not so easy. Twilight's hoof wrapped more firmly around hers.
“Sunrise, you need to take it easy on yourself. Everything will be alright, we'll face it together and I'll be here for you every step of the way. You shouldn't shoulder this all on your own. You have friends. You have me.” The room went quiet as they again stared into each others eyes. Sunrise couldn't think of what to say as Twilight's words sank in.
'She's right. I don't need to protect her, I need her by my side. Not just Twilight, but Scootaloo and Pinkie Pie, Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom. I wouldn't be where I am if it weren't for all that they did for me last night. I wouldn't have been able to show Twilight my feelings and she wouldn't have been able to confront her feelings and let go of her guilt. I'll need all of their help and support if we want to mend the wounds left behind by Rainbow Dash's passing.
“Twilight... You're right, I'm not alone. I..” A sudden knock on the door brought her to an abrupt stop. Twilight and Sunrise simultaneously turned to the door as it cracked open and the doctor entered the exam room with a satisfied smile on his face that instantly brought a feeling of hope to both mares. Behind him followed a file suspended in his magic aura. He opened the file, clearing his throat and adjusting his glasses before speaking.
“Vibrant Sunrise, based on your most recent scans I think it would be best to remove your casts today and start you on physical therapy later this week!” He said enthusiastically. Sunrise’s eye's went wide and her mouth agape. She was silent for a moment. She placed her hoof over her chest, monitoring her heart rate. Twilight looked on in confused concern.
“I- I'll be able to walk soon?” She looked up at the doctor, who looked much less confused than Twilight. His smile even seemed to get bigger as she gently nodded. Sunrise gave a couple short gasps before breaking into excited laughter, tears were even glistening in her eyes.
“Twilight! Twilight! I'll be able to walk soon!” She shouted as she pulled Twilight into a tight bear hug so tight she could hear her back crack from the pressure.
“Sunrise be careful you don't want to get you're heart rate too high!” Twilight shocked out. Despite her worry, she couldn't help but smile right along with her. This is the most excited I've ever seen her. I guess it makes sense. Her life is short, dangerous and unpredictable. She's lucky to have made it through this last month alive with all that's happened. Even though she wouldn't tell me to keep me from worrying, I think she was really scared of... not getting a chance to experience walking. The doctor interjected with a purposeful cough, successfully getting their attention.
“It will be a slow process, you'll be attending physical therapy three times a week for three weeks before you regain enough function to maneuver completely on your own. The nerve and muscle damage from a lack of oxygen was more extensive than the damage to your bones. I'll also be recommending following a home regiment after you finish here. I should tell you that it's unlikely that you will ever be able to run and even if your legs become strong enough to do so, you're heart will not be able to take the strain.” Despite the doctor's caution, Sunrise still wore a bright smile, and still kept Twilight in her embrace, though less bone crushing and more tender.
“I know. I know it'll be hard. Everything is always hard but I'll get through it and I will walk. Twilight, I'll need your support and companionship through this, I can't do it without you. Will you walk beside me?” Sunrise's voice was more serious and somber, but held a deep strength and hope. Twilight's eyes glistened as small tears pooled in her eyes. Wrapping her hooves around Sunrise she rested her head on her shoulder and spoke softly near her ear.
“Of course Sunrise, every single step.”
“Thank you Twilight... Thank you.” After taking a few prolonged moments enjoying the embrace, Sunrise turned to the doctor.
“Alright, I'm ready. Let's get these off.”
“Okay, I'll just need you lay down and hold still while I saw through the casts.” His horn lit up as a cabinet beside him opened and a small device with a circular saw was pulled out. Twilight stepped away, but still held Sunrise's hoof as Sunrise lay on her back. The saw spun on and the doctor put it against the cast. Is it even worth having function in my wings back? I'll be able to walk, that should be enough right? Flying would be dangerous, any mistake could cost me my life, and even if I don't make a mistake, if I try to fly to fast it could send my heart into another attack. I told Scootaloo that she and could learn to fly together and I want to experience flying before I die, but if that means putting my life in danger... I should talk to Twilight about this, and Scootaloo. She looked down at her legs, the saw was cutting through the hard casts like butter, she wouldn't have much longer until he was finished. I wonder what it'll feel like, I've had them on my whole life. As first cast came off she felt the cool air almost wrap around her hind leg. She couldn't help but smile at the soothing and freeing sensation. So, that's what it feels like. I can't wait until I can walk again. I can help Twilight around the library, we could do more things together. I can spend more time with Pinkie Pie and Scootaloo. Most importantly, I wont be a burden on Twilight anymore. The loud buzz of the saw dulled to a light hum before stopping completely.
“All finished.” The doctor said cheerfully as he lay the saw on the counter and a levitated the casts into a bin. “You can start physical therapy three days from now. In the mean time, I going to have you wear removable braces on your legs. You can take them off to sleep and bathe, but I want you to leave them on the rest of the time okay.” Sunrise sat up, her freed legs dangling over the side of the bed. She tenderly rubbed them, contemplating trying to move them. After a moment, she sighed and nodded at the doctor.
“Also, in light of your recent cardiac events, I'm going to give you a heart monitor that you'll wear twenty-four seven. It's water proof so you don't need to take it it off to bathe. The monitor will record every beat of your heart and note any abnormalities. When you come back for your therapy I'll read the results and see if you need more medication or surgery. I'm also ordering an ultrasound and EKG today to see if there is any immediate risks that need to be addressed. This should go without saying but you need to avoid stress and conflict if at all possible. If you keep having tachycardic events it will damage your ventricles and weaken your heart further. In other words, each time you have an attack, you're effectively shortening your life.” He looked sternly at Sunrise. He's perceptive, or maybe word just travels fast here. Either way, now Twilight's going to be worried. A glace to her side revealed that Twilight was indeed worried. Her wide, concerned eyes darting between the doctor and herself. She probably thinks I wont let it go, and why should I? I can handle this, I've been okay up till now because I know how to control my stress and feelings. I promised I would do what I could to help Twilight, as well as Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom's sisters. I can't just give up because it might be stressful! Despite her inner frustration, she simply smiled and nodded at the doctor.
“I understand, I'll be more careful. I promise.” She could tell the doctor wasn't completely convinced but what could he do? The doctor sighed, looking as though he were about to shake his head in disapproval.
“I hope you do. Let's start your ultrasound and EKG, then get you hooked up to that monitor.” I can't let it go. I have to try and make things better. I was able to handle it on my own, now that Twilight and my friends are by my side, it's not dangerous. I'll be okay. I know I will.
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It was noon when Twilight and Sunrise left the hospital. Sunrise was sporting sturdy but comfortable black braces with multiple straps. She knew she shouldn't try to move her legs until her therapy, but resisting the urge was difficult. The sun light was warm and the sky was clear, an almost constant breeze completed the absolutely gorgeous day. Sunrise stopped and closed her eyes, taking in the suns warmth into her fur and smelling the soft spring breeze.
“It's such a beautiful day.” Twilight said, smiling at Sunrise. That's one of the best things about her. She feels everything so strongly because it's all so new to her. Even with the pain and hardship she has in her life, everything is special and beautiful to her.
“Yes, it really is.” Her voice was dreamy and content. Reaching her hooves to the air she leaned into a relaxed and comfortable stretch, making Twilight giggle lightly.
“So what do you want to do today? We could get a book and read outside or on the balcony.”
“That sounds wonderful, bring out a few pillows and we could just relax with a good book in the sun. But there's something I have to take care of first.” As soon as Sunrise said the word But, Twilight's expression became increasingly concerned.
“And what is it you have to take care of?” Twilight asked nervously, knowing she likely wouldn't like the answer. In response, Sunrise pulled a bag resting beside her on her wheelchair.
“The dress I borrowed from Rarity. I need to return it.”
“I thought you had Sweetie Belle return it for you.”
“Only the hat, I saved this for today.” Sunrise's eyes were determined. She held up the bag and looked at Twilight as though she were challenging her. She knew Twilight would protest, but she felt it was something she had to do.
“Sunrise please don't do this. Just have Sweetie Belle return it.” Twilight said pleadingly.
“Twilight, I have to do this. This is the best opportunity I'll have to talk to Rarity, besides, I don't want to risk getting Sweetie Belle in trouble.”
“Sunrise you can't! Didn't you hear what the doctor said? You can't risk letting your heart get stressed!”
“Twilight I'm fine. My ultrasound and EKG didn't show any more degeneration in my valves or arteries and..”
“This time!” Twilight interjected, her frustrated and concerned voice sounding as though she were on the verge of tears. “And what happens next time? Or the time after that? Sunrise, each time you get stressed it significantly shorten your life, if not kill you right on the spot! Doesn't that matter to you?”
“Twilight, of course it matters to me...”
“Then let it go! I know you want to help me and the girls, I know you have this crazy notion that it's your duty to make everything better for everypony but none of that matters if you die! And what about me? I can't lose any more friends, I can't lose you Sunrise! Please, for me, let it go. Just for now, please.” Twilight was begging and tears were beginning to pool in her eyes. Sunrise lowered the bag holding the dress, placing it on the ground. Taking each of Twilight's hooves into her own, she looked deep into the eyes of the mare she loved.
“Twilight, I'm sorry but, I do have to do this. I wasn't born, I inherited this life and all the suffering and grief in it. Rainbow Dash isn't here to undo the damage but I am, and I can. Everypony close to me or her suffered, and you more than anypony. I just can't let that go Twilight! You say it's crazy that I think it's my duty to try and make things right, but it's not. I can help them! I have a responsibility to the ponies she and I have hurt. Applejack still cries at night, when she thinks she can't be heard, and Rarity has been shut it and isolated, choosing to be alone because she doesn't think anyone can understand. She's right, the situation we, that is Rainbow Dash and myself, have put you through is one nopony has had to deal with. No pony can help her, no pony can say they understand and that it will get better, no pony but us Twilight, you and me. Twilight, I want you to come with me to Rarity's. I want you beside me to help our friends, every single step. Please, I need you. Will you stay by my side?”
Twilight was stunned by Sunrise's speech. She stared into her eyes, in them was a complex mix of feeling that, together, were hard to discern. Anger, hope, love, passion, strength and sadness were all among the feelings represented in her large violet orbs. A responsibility... She, she hardly knows them and yet, she's trying harder to help my friends than I am. She's even trying harder to help me than I was. She's taking on so much on her shoulders and I've left her alone with that burden this whole time. She's been given such a hard life and she's trying to make the most of it... and she wants to spend it with me, she's risked her life again and again to make me happy, and to keep my true to myself and my heart. I can't let her bear this alone anymore! They're my friends too and I have to help them! Her sad expression slowly grew into soft and warm smile, but her eyes burned with new strength and courage.
“Every single step.” Twilight's simple words filled Sunrise's heart with happiness and her smile reflected Twilight's own.
“Thank you. I- I didn't want to do this alone.” She spoke, her voice choked as she held back her tears
“I'm never running away from you again. I promise, you'll never be alone. I'm sorry it took me so long to realize, everything you've done for me, and for our friends. I know this will have a happy ending, and they'll all understand you like I do, and they'll all appreciate you like I do. Come on, we have a friend who needs our help.” With nod and a confident smile, they made their way to the Carousel Boutique.
*************************************************************************************************************
“So.... this is it?” Sunrise asked as she stared, perplexed, at the strangely designed building. Though it seems normal for this town. She thought, reflecting on Twilight's library and Sugar Cube Corner. This building was apparently an ornate dress shop designed to be modeled after a carousel. Hence the name I guess. Twilight giggled.
“Yep, this is it.” She paused, looking up at shop her smile faded. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
“We came all the way here. It would be a wasted opportunity if we left now. Don't worry Twilight, It'll be okay.” Cautiously they approached the door. Twilight could quickly tell something was wrong. It was dark dimly light inside and the windows looked dusty. Twilight shot Sunrise a nervous glance as she raised her hoof to the door and knocked. The sound of the knock echoes through the shop, giving it an empty feeling. They waited quietly for several moments.
“Sweetie Belle said she would be here. I'm going to try again.”
“You don't think she would still be asleep at this hour do you?” Twilight asked, not fully wanting to know the answer.
“We'll find out.” With that, Sunrise began knocking again. After a three knocks she stopped. Her ear twitched as she heard the sound of soft, slow hoof beats. Then, a light flicked on in the main area of the boutique. Sunrise heard Twilight gulp, and swore she saw her visibly trembling. Placing a reassuring hoof on her shoulder, Sunrise felt that her body relaxing.
“It's going to be alright.” At her assurance Twilight took a deep breath as a the door knob turned. The door slowly creaked open.
Standing at the door look as though she had seen a ghost was a white unicorn with a bedraggled main. She was wearing pajamas and looked like she hadn't seen a good night's sleep in some time. I remember her from the day I woke up at the hospital.. She's really declined since then. We should have come sooner. I understand now why Sweetie Belle is so worried.
Twilight felt her heart skip a beat as she lay eyes on her disheveled friend. Oh Celestia... Rarity, I had no idea what this has done to you. I- this.... it's all my fault. I haven't made any effort to help my best friends because I was scared and guilty. I could have done something, I know what she's going through. We could have helped each other...
“R- Rainbow Dash, Twilight... Good to see you. Um, I- I apologize for the state I'm in I..”
“Rarity, no. I'm not Rainbow Dash. I'm Vibrant Sunrise. We're came here to talk to you. To see if you were alright.” Sunrise held her cool gaze on Rarity's eyes, though her eyes seemed fixed between Twilight and the floor.
“Oh, I see. I had heard you refused to bring Rainbow Dash back. I am sorry but it seems we have nothing to talk about.” Her horn lit up and the door began to shut, but a swift hoof from Twilight held it open, the smack of hoof against the door snapping the dull sounding Rarity to alertness.
“Rarity please! Let us help you.” Twilight implored.
“I'm afraid neither need you're help nor want it Twilight. I'm doing just fine on my own. Now leave, I'm very busy.”
“You haven't looked at me since you opened the door.” Sunrise spoke coldly. The chill in her voice caught Twilight off guard, and apparently Rarity as well as she shot her glance away from them like she had been caught in a lie. She pulled the bag out from beside her and held it up in front of Rarity.
“This is yours, you can have it back.” Twilight was further confused by the almost hostile tone in Sunrise's voice.
She knows what she's doing, I have to trust her. She assured herself.
Curious, Rarity took the bag in her magic and looked inside. Upon seeing it's contents she gasped dramatically.
“How in Equestria did you get a hold of this!? This was from last years spring line! I had it in a closet in my inspiration room.” She almost seemed outraged. And she should be outraged... She's not as mad as she should be.
“I'm sorry, I needed it yesterday for something.” Her tone was become more cold and held less emotion with every word. Rarity stared down into the bag, not quite staring at anything as though she were in deep thought. After she mulled her feelings over in her mind she looked up, not at Sunrise, but at Twilight.
“You're chair bound so I can only assume you took it Twilight.” Her smooth and calm voice was loaded with spite and venom.
“No, Rarity I-”
“Rarity wait!” A high voice called out from inside the boutique. Rarity opened the door fully as Sweetie Belle ran past her, stepping in front of Twilight. “Twilight would never steal and you know it! It was me. I took it and let Sunrise borrow it and the matching hat.” At that, Rarity's jaw dropped and, after a few shocked stutters she glared at Sweetie in disbelief.
“Sweetie Belle! You were conspiring with...”
“I asked her to do it, and she had a good reason to.” Sunrise cut her off. She glanced over to Twilight and could tell her courage was waning. She had shrunk herself, lowering her head and curling her tail in front of her. With an icy glare she returned her gaze to Rarity.
“Can we talk inside?”
“Rarity please let us in, we just want to help you.” Twilight said, slowly regaining her conviction. 'I know what Sunrise is doing, she's acting mean to provoke her. She's putting herself in the position of being the bad guy. I can't just curl in a ball and give up! My friend needs me, and Sunrise needs me.'
“You coerced my little sister to steal from me, you refuse to bring one of our best friend's memories back and you expect me to let you in?!” Rarity spoke with an unmistakable edge of bitterly hurt feelings to her words.
“You'll let us in.” Sunrise said simply as though an indisputable fact.
“What makes you think I would?” She questioned, surprised and curious by Sunrise's certainty.
“Because, you've barely looked at me. And when you should lash out at me, you've done it to Twilight. You'll let us in, because while you may not get closure by talking with us, you definitely wont get it by turning away.” Sunrise's eyes and expression softened. “You want closure, I know you do. Something happened with you and Rainbow Dash and it's hurt you. Now may be the only chance you have to get what you need out of it. So please, let us help you.” The jarring change in attitude disarmed Rarity as much as what was being said. Nervously her eyes darted from the floor to her little sister looking earnestly and hopefully at her. After over a minute of anxious fidgeting, she gave in with a sigh. Turning around she walked into her home. Sweetie Belle smiled with relief and followed behind her. Sunrise smiled and game Twilight an encouraging nod, easing her tension. Taking a deep breath, Twilight smiled gratefully and proceeded in with Sunrise in toe.
The inside of the shop was littered with unfinished projects and the materials of ones that never got a start. On the far end of the room were crumpled up papers and scribbled out sketches. The air smelled of cloth and dust and everything had a stillness about it that made it seem like the shop saw almost no business traffic recently. Sunrise's eyes widened as she watched Rarity trot over to the end of the room. She levitated a small tea cup off a near by shelf and turned around to face Twilight and Sunrise.
“We'll, say what you have to say.” She spoke as calmly and normally as she could, but the hint of repressed anger was still present. Twilight opened her mouth, not knowing what to say, only that she had to say something. Before she could however, Sunrise interjected.
“You're limping. What happened?” As soon as the question left her lips the atmosphere in the room changed. Twilight looked at guiltily at the floor through the corner of her eyes and Sweetie Belle's gaze shifted between Sunrise and her sister. For a moment Rarity's eyes met Sunrise's before she averted them to her tea, swishing it nervously around.
“It was nothing, just an accident.” It was clear to Sunrise, just by her eyes, that she was lying. She had a hunch as to what actually happened though. Without looking away from Rarity she called out to Twilight.
“Twilight, you know what really happened to her don't you?” Taking a moment to steel herself, she looked up at her friend who was avoiding looking at any of them. She felt an immense sense of guilt and pity for her.
“I do.”
“It was Rainbow Dash... wasn't it?” Sunrise asked, Twilight nodded solemnly in response.
“The day before Rainbow Dash died, she crashed into Rarity. I never learned why she did it, but I know she did it on purpose. I was there, there was no way it was an accident. It was because I confronted her about it that she hit me... It's because of that that everything happened.”
“She is not dead, she lost her memory. You could have brought her back any time yet you refuse.” Spite was deep and thick in her voice, all of it directed at Twilight.
“It's not that simple, please understand! That's not Rainbow Dash! She's Vibrant Sunrise, a smart, caring and loyal mare. She's intuitive and strong willed and she'll never let you lie to yourself!” Twilight frantically retorted.
“Rarity, she's right. I'm not Rainbow Dash. I can't apologize for her and I wont apologize for being alive. I don't want to be erased, I exist. I'm happy being alive, I have friends, I have ponies who care about me, I have Twilight! Rarity, I understand now...”
“I don't want to hear any more. Leave now.” She said simply as she turned her back on them, but Sunrise wouldn't be stopped.
“Rarity wait! They're just trying to help. Please, I can't stand seeing you like this. Let her help you.” Her pleas to her older sister couldn't elicit any response from her, though Sunrise could feel that she was in a great deal of distress. I have to keep going, she's still not facing the truth. It's not even that she can't accept Rainbow Dash is gone, she can't even accept how she feels about it or anything. She's not coming to terms with this trauma, she's just locking it and herself away. I have to push harder, for her sake. Rarity, please forgive me.
“We aren't leaving because I'm not done yet. You're going to hear this, because it's the truth you need to face. You've hid yourself away, away from every pony who cared about you, because you didn't want them to see how damaged you are!”
“Y- you don't know a thing..” She voice carried uncertainty and even a hint of fear. She took small steps back, trying but failing to force herself to look at Sunrise.
“You didn't want them see how hurt you were because you felt guilty for it! You blamed Rainbow Dash for hurting you, and you're angry that she never even felt bad!”
“No! I dont.. I- I...”
“Now you're taking that out on Twilight because you know in your heart that Rainbow Dash is gone forever and you blame yourself!”
“She isn't gone!” Rarity shouted, silencing Sunrise. Tears were rolling down her cheek and she sniffled softly. Her next were were little more than a choked whisper. “She can't be gone... I can't forgive myself without her.”
She blames herself... but it's not her fault, she couldn't have known she would have died. She has no reason to feel so consumed by guilt. Leaning back in her chair she closed her eyes, ruminating, running through the possible reasons. The sudden sound of hoof steps jarred her from her thoughts. Opening her eyes she watched as Twilight, eyes filled with strength and compassion, walk towards Rarity. Sunrise smiled proudly as Twilight marched up to her distressed friend, stopping less half tail length from her. She was silent for a long moment, only looking at Rarity with compassionate eyes.
“S- stay away!” Her voice trembled as Twilight stepped closer, their faces only inches away from one another.
“W-what do you..” Rarity began defensively, but Twilight wouldn't have it. Before she could say another word Twilight threw her hooves around her and pulled her into a tight embrace.
“I'm so sorry Rarity.” Placing her head over Rarity's should she held tight to her friend as tears began streaming down her face through her lightly closed eyes. Twilight wore a soft but sad smile as she stroked her friends back in comfort. She struggled weakly against Twilight, trying to bring herself to pull away, but in her heart, she knew this was what she wanted. Her struggles became weaker and weaker and Twilight held her ever closer.
“I'm sorry I let you suffer through this all alone. I should have come sooner. I should have been there for you. I understand how you've been feeling. I know the kind of pain you're in. Rarity, you're so brave and so strong to have gone through it alone. I couldn't have done it, I would have lost my self. It's okay Rarity, it's okay. We're here for you now, I'm here for you. You don't have to be alone anymore.” Finally, she couldn't struggle any more. Her body went limp in Twilight's embrace and her tears began to flow unrestricted and unhindered. She trembled as she fought back sobs.
“How... how could you understand?” She whispered, her voice in disbelief as though she had been shown something impossible.
“Because... I felt the same. The last thing I said to her was horrible and so full of anger. I- I blamed myself for her death... no I couldn't accept it. I told myself she wasn't dead. She couldn't go until she forgave me. I was so angry at her and now she's gone. I miss her so much, and I was being suffocated by my guilt. Oh Rarity! I'll never be able to tell her how sorry I am! I- I'll never know why it all happened!” Her smile was now a pain filled grimace, she clenched her teeth as she choked out sobs.
“Twilight no... Don't say that. Please, she can't be gone! She can't have... she can't have gone hating us. With us angry at her because we couldn't understand what she was feeling. It's not fair Twilight. It's just not right. She can't be gone. I have- I have to tell her I forgive her. She has to know she didn't leave with all her friends angry at her. What kind of friends are we if we made the last things she felt pain and anger. Twilight, oh how could I let that happen to her!?” She broke down, throwing her hooves around Twilight and holding her just as tight as Twilight held her and cried. She cried loudly and openly, with nothing held back.
“It's not your fault Rarity. It's not your fault.” Twilight consoled.
“Rarity.” Sunrise said softly as she rolled her chair toward the grieving ponies. Her eyes were soft and filled with empathy, they glistened with tears. She came to a stop behind Twilight and looked Rarity in her eyes. “Twilight is right. It's not you're fault, and it's not hers. Rarity, I need you to look at me. I know it's hard but please, look into my eyes, listen to my voice.” She slowly looked up, this time, her eyes were clear of denial or hope. She was truly looking at Sunrise. “Do you see her? Do you see her in my eyes, or hear her in my voice? She's not there is she?” As Sunrise pressured her, Twilight continued stroking her back reassuringly. After taking a long moment to sort out what she saw, heard and felt, Rarity silently shook her head.
“No... I don't”
“I'm sorry Rarity.” Twilight said softly. “She's gone... she's gone.”
“Please don't blame Twilight! I asked her, I begged her not to use the memory spell! I'm not Rainbow Dash, I'm my own pony. I don't want to disappear! I don't want to be a part of some pony else! I just want to be me! I want to be happy, I want to enjoy this short life as long as I can. I want all the suffering around my, around Twilight and my friends to stop. It's Rainbow Dash's fault, and it's my fault. Rarity, there was nothing you or Twilight could have done, you don't have to blame yourselves any more. Rainbow Dash may be gone, but there are ponies who are still here, and are still being hurt by the wounds left behind when she died. Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Scootaloo... they were all hurt and lost because of what happened. They may never get their answers but they had to move forward because there are still ponies that love and care about them. Sweetie Belle told me, she told me how much you have been suffering all alone. She begged me to save you, like I did for Scootaloo. But I can't, you're the only one who can come to terms and face how you feel and face the how things are. But you don't have to face it alone!”
“She's right! Please listen to her. I hate not being able to do anything to make you better. I just.. I just want my sister back!” Sweetie Belle broke down into tears and ran to her sister. Twilight, stepped to Rarity's side, keeping a comforting hoof on her shoulder as Sweetie Belle wrapped her hooves around her front leg and buried her face in her older sister's chest. Her warm tears soaking into her white fur. She looked down to her little sister, stunned into silence and mouth agape. Suddenly, in a blur of motion she took her sister into her hooves and cried right along with her.
“Sweetie Belle! Sweetie Belle I'm so sorry you had to see me this way. I just... I didn't know what to do with my self. And Twilight...” Rarity shifted her eyes onto Twilight. “Can you ever forgive me for how I treated you. None of this was your fault either, and I shouldn't have added to the burden you had to bear by acting like it was.”
“Of course I forgive you. Can you forgive me for leaving you alone for so long? Thinking about what you've had to go through alone... I've had Sunrise by my side the whole time and I could barely made it through. I let you, one of my best friends, go through this horrible time all alone. I can't forgive myself for that... I don't think I ever will.” Twilight looked down at the floor, eyes heavy with guilt. Sunrise place her hoof on Twilight shoulder and, to Twilight's surprise, Rarity took her hoof into her own.
“I forgive you, this whole ordeal has been hard on everypony. I feel bad that I wasn't there for you or the other girls. I just didn't know what to do, none of us did.”
“I know.. but what's important now is that we're going to support each other as friends.” Twilight smiled, and, after wiping her tears away, Rarity smiled back at her.
“Does this mean you'll also be friends with Sunrise?!” Sweetie Belle blurted excitedly. The atmosphere in the room changed as Twilight looked nervously between Sunrise and Rarity. Sunrise glanced at the young filly, then to her sister.
“I'll understand if you need time, or if you flat out refuse. I'm just happy that you and Twilight are friends again, and that you've moved forward... Thanks Sweetie Belle, none of this would have happened without you. You saved your sister.” With those words and a solemn expression her began to turn her chair around. “I'll meet you at home Twilight.” She began rolling away, but before she could get half way to the door a shout stopped her in her tracks.
“Wait!” Rarity called. Sunrise turned around, wearing a look of cautious surprise on her face. Rarity closed her eyes. Taking a deep breath before opening them. Her mind now focused she continued. “I don't know how to deal with this... I'm still not sure what to do or feel about you.” As Rarity spoke the look on Sweetie Belles face became increasingly disappointed and distraught. She looked from her little sister to Twilight, then gave a small, but genuine smile.
“But you went to great lengths to help me and Sweetie Belle. It's because of you that Twilight has been able to handle all this. And now, I have my friend back. I think, we could become fine friends Vibrant Sunrise.” This time it was Sunrise who was at a loss for words. To everypony's surprise, she began to cry with a relieved smile on her face. She wiped the tears from her face as they came.
“I- you have no idea how relieved I am to hear you say that... Thank you Rarity.” Twilight smiled and made her way to Sunrise's side.
“You've done a great thing Sunrise. Thank you.” Twilight gently rubbed her shoulder. This time, it was she who was smiling proudly.
“Oh dear. I didn't think I would make you cry darling.” Rarity giggled and Sweetie Belle was beaming. This was the happiest she had seen her sister in too long.
“Ah! This just gave me great inspiration! I have to get working on a new dress to commemorate this occasion!” She smiled excitedly. Twilight gave a small laugh and smiled at Rarity's.
“That's okay, we have to get back anyway. The doctor ordered Sunrise to take it easy while they monitor her heart so all this excitement is probably as much as she can take.”
“I also still have to take my next pill.” Sunrise added.
“You two have a wonderful night. I shall let you know when the dress is done! I want you to be the first to see it! Oh but do come over again soon for tea and makeovers! I have caffeine free.” She spoke in her normal up-beat voice.
“A makeover sounds great!” Sunrise said excitedly. At this, Rarity's eyes softened as her gaze shifted to something in her mind, almost nostalgic.
“Yes, I've always wanted to work with your... with a mane like yours.” She spoke in an almost wispy voice. She shook her head, clearing her thoughts. “Well, I suppose you must be off then Do come by again soon.” Her smile returned. Twilight nodded.
“We will, I promise.” Twilight turned to leave with Sunrise close behind. Suddenly Sunrise stopped and looked back at Rarity.
“Oh, Rarity?”
“Yes dear?” She questioned hesitantly.
“I was wondering, would you be able to teach me how to knit or crochet? I'm going to be stuck taking it easy the next couple days, I thought it would be nice to learn to do something new. Oh, but if you'll be busy I understand.” The surprise in Rarity's eyes at the unexpected question was obvious, but it faded and was soon replaced with a look of understanding.
“I'll be free tomorrow. I'm sure you'll make something wonderful.”
“Thank you, I really appreciate it. With you're help I'm sure I will.” With that, Twilight and Sunrise made their way home, bidding farewell to Rarity and Sweetie Belle.
I didn't think it would have ended so well. It's all because Twilight could understand how Rarity felt. She was able to connect with that and help her work through a kind of pain Twilight was so familiar with. Because of that, I now have a great new friend, and Sweetie Belle has her sister back. Thing are going so well. The pain caused by what happened, because of Rainbow Dash and myself... I'm mending it, one by one, with friendship, the wounds are healing. I have no doubt that I can do the same for the others. We'll save them, and then I can be happy, for however long I can. Filled with more optimism and confidence than ever before, she and Twilight walk side by side back to their home.