//------------------------------// // Ch1: I Run Afoul // Story: Sunder // by Not Luna //------------------------------// *Sigh* … “What’s taking her so long?” … “C’mon you crazy blue horse! You’re never late!” … “Fucking Lun--” “I’m here! I’m here!” There she is! Luna bounded around the corner of the hedges and slid to a stop in front of my pedestal. “There you are! You know I get all worried and stir crazy when you’re late like that!” She gazed up at me with an apologetic look that was quite exquisite if I do say so myself. “I have a legitimate excuse this time! Remember the changeling moles last Thursday?” “Yeah, how could I not? I’m pretty sure they were fucking in the bushes before they got caught.” “Tia thought it prudent to increase the guard around my room for ‘protection’. I had a harder time sneaking out than usual." Her face scrunched up for a second. "Also eww.” “Damn right eww. The noises they made were just so fucking unatur--” “Too much information Terry!” I guffawed uproariously. I always enjoyed riling her up like that. Especially with sex jokes. “If you are quite done laughing about the machinations of changeling intercourse, I’d like to get started. Tia allowed me to go into the restricted section for a reason I made up, so I have some new ones this week.” “By all means, go ahead.” I watched silently as Luna lit up her horn, several books of varying age and thickness floated out of her mane. Fucking!-- Why!? Out of said mane also came a red picnic blanket, a full tea set, and some light snackage. How she manages to not get it tangled or sticky I’ll never know. Everything was set up in no time under the half moon’s gentle light. She plopped down on the blanket and cracked open the nearest book. “We’ll start with Starswirl’s 'unabridged' notes on the Elements of Harmony. Maybe that will get us somewhere.” I highly doubted it. Every week for twenty-five hundred years we’ve been at this and still no fruit to be borne. It made for some excellent debate topics though! God when did I turn into such a fag? Oh yeah! That… -------------------------------------------------------------- (2,536 Years ago) “Goddamn do I look sexy.” It took thirty seconds for my retarded ass to figure out that I said that out loud. A quick survey of the hotel room confirmed that I was alone, and perfectly safe from the burning ridicule of Justin and Beth. I looked back to the mirror and continued to admire the almost year-and-a-half project that I had worked and saved up for. It was a perfect, to-scale rendition of Terrorblade from Dota 2. Countless steel strips and freedom dollars came together to create the badass armor I inhabited. The purple and blue stained strips clanked together as I did another pose, checking the heavy ass metal wings welded to the back and the massive pair of horns that adorned my head. “Yeah, I’m ready.” I walked out of the hotel room, hunched over, to get the horns through the door and continued to do so for the sake of the ceiling. One might say to oneself: “Hey Terry! Why didn't you just make a smaller version and use that?” Well let me answer that for you fully fledged citizen! When I was very young I was diagnosed with Gigantism, making my growth hormones go all outta whack until I was about twenty-nine and seven foot, eleven inches. I was a big fucking dude, but so was Terrorblade. When Comic Con rolled into San Diego, I knew who I was going to be, the giant Dota fag that I am. I crouched again to get into the elevator bound for the lobby. The people inside all complimented me, to which I responded with in my beep baritone: “I will repay this debt.” God that felt good. When I stepped out into the lobby I was showered in more praise and commendations. For once it felt good to be the tall guy in the room. “Yo Terry! Over here man!” I could recognize that scratchy voice anywhere. Standing near the entrance of the hotel was my best friend Justin, dressed in a Nanosuit 2.0, and his girlfriend Beth, who apparently ‘Didn’t get the appeal of playing dress up in public.' Pleb. In due time we all made our way to the convention center a couple of blocks down the road. When we showed our tickets and got inside, it. Was. Glorious! Row, upon row, upon row of random crap waiting for us. An all you can eat buffet of nerdage, discovery, and Cheeto dust, splayed out like a beautifully fat gamer chick. And all for us. “Onetwothreego!” With my final battle cry I charged straight into the crowds of people. I had a thousand dollars to spend, and five hours before they closed up. I had plenty of time. With my mind set on where to go first, I made my way to the more game centered portion of the con using my towering height and found what I was looking for. A shop filled to the brim with game-themed weapons. I browsed the selection for something cool, when I came upon... a thing. Something that could not in any way shape or form, be a coincidence. Hanging up on a rack were a pair of glaives. Glaives not unlike the ones Terrorblade used in-game. That was fucking creepy as shit and squeal inducing at the same time. I pointed to the glaives. “How much?” The man behind the counter with the huge nose turned to me. “Two-fifty each.” “Done.” I literally threw my money at him, not caring that I just wasted half my dosh on two things. I was just so fucking happy! Picking up the glaives I tested their weight. Perfectly balanced, sharp and edgy, and glowing. All seemed to be in ord--. … Glowing? My body fell deathly still and a numbness began creeping its way through my body from my hands. The last thing I felt before blacking out was the sensation of being dunked in water. -------------------------------------------------------------- (Present Day) “Ugh! Nothing In here either! Starswirl you piece of manure!” She chucked the book a good fifteen feet away where it landed on the damp grass. “Luna, no need to get anal about it. It’s just one book out of the other thousands we’ve tried. Why get uppity about this one?” Luna let out a sorrowful sigh and collapsed back onto the blanket. “I guess I just expected him of all ponies to know at least something about the stone spells that the Elements seem to have an affinity for.” She laid her head on the ground and sighed again. “I was getting my hopes up for this one. Hoping that there would be at least something to try. Guess it was just wishful thinking.” I looked upon the downtrodden Lunar Princess and felt the need to comfort her in some way. Mopey women were my kryptonite and awakened my inner white knight. “Hey, maybe we need a little wishful thinking. Something to keep the hopes up ya’know? Shit I'm not good at this. Don’t feel so bad about it Lulu, I hate seeing you sad,” That got a little smile out of her which in turn made me smile inwardly, as I had not a mouth the smile with. “Mmm, you always know how to treat a girl right don’t you.” I scoffed. “Are you kidding me? I was the biggest, no pun intended, spazlord of all my peers. My social skills with girls is in the negatives sister. It’s a wonder how I got you to stick around as long as you did!” She let out a cute little giggle. “You know why. Stacked upon your ‘bountiful’ charm you are my best friend. I place emphasis on that for a reason. And if anything my sister’s student was taught holds weight, than friends help each other out in times of need. Am I wrong?” “No.” “That’s right. Just remember what you did for me okay?" Smug little… She's right though. If I wasn't a statue I’d ruffle that hair so hard. I’d probably lose my hand though. I’d wager there was a black hole in there or some shi--. … “Luna? When did you guys plant moving black vines in the maze?” Luna looked around, oblivious to the thin vine that poked through the earth underneath her. “I see no black vines. Perhaps your vision is-- Gak!” Instantaneously, several larger vines spread from a trapdoor-like patch of grass and latched onto Luna. One wrapped around her horn and another wrapped around her midsection, grounding her. Others grabbed her in varying places on her legs. “LUNA!” She immediately began struggling and writhing in the grip of the vines, only for them to get tighter, causing her eyes to pop open and look fearfully around. Then the vines started doing what I feared the most, dragging her down into the ground. “NO!” Her eyes finally set on me. We looked at each other as time seemed to slow. She closed her eyes, and did something that moved me in a way that I cannot describe. She began to cry. Seeing the hot tears flow down her cheeks caused my metaphorical blood to boil to dangerous temperatures. All I could think about was anger, anger, anger, ANGER! Anger for the vines, anger for Celestia who trapped me in this prison, and anger for myself for not being able to act as Luna was dragged to her unknown fate. Anger turned into hate, and hate turned into… Rage. Rage! RAGE! Cracks began to form on the surface of the stone that was me. From those cracks shone an icy cyan light. I felt it, my rage was bringing me back to life! I fed the fires of my other half more and the cracks continued to form. I turned my attention from myself to check on Luna--. She was already halfway into the hole. I could feel it! Unbridled power with a blood lust to match flowing through me. Just.. a little... more! “The hunter demon RAGES!” My statue exploded outwards in a cascade of rubble and light. The dust didn’t even begin to settle before I hurled ball of light and demon-fire at the closing door of grass. I stomped my way on cloven hooves over to the patch that held the cursed plant. I had grown to over eleven feet high with an extra foot from my horns. My wings now extended outward, spilling liquid shadow on the grass like a tainted river spring. My head now resembled more of a skull than a human head, with a gaping mouth and eye sockets that glowed a ghostly cyan. My rage continued to burn brightly in my new from as I ripped off the patch of grass to reveal a tunnel leading downwards. From within I could hear scraping, slithering, and a soft whimper. My face glowed a fraction brighter. I raised my head to the heavens and bellowed a war-cry and a challenge to whatever had the gall to foalnap my best friend. “Izh icha safras!”