“So where are we going?” Pip asked his teacher, as they trotted to the town of Ponyville’s square. Where Sugarcube corner and all that one shop who sold both sofas and quills made business. Pipsqueak trotted behind his teacher, he was nervous, though he knew exactly where was he going the pony who he was going to meet was still a mistery, all he knew was that it was a male. And he assumed he was some sort of expert in young colts who happened to like other colts, but he didn’t exactly know.
His teacher stopped and looked at him preparing to talk but before she could, Pipsqueak corrected his sentence.
“I mean who are we going to meet?” he told her.
“We are going to meet a friend of mine, Caramel.”
“What can he do to help?” Pip asked, his voice filled to the brim with curiosity, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t have some self interest in it too. This whole meeting was for his sake, of course, so why wouldn’t he? He just wanted this whole thing to end up, or at least to be assured that everything was going to be alright, and not from a random pony that could say it, but would never experience that. He wanted proof that it was going to be ok.
“Well....Caramel had once had the same issues as you, he was once a colt and he shared the same....angst, you have, it took him a while to find himself, but he’s finally honest with yourself, I think maybe you can learn a lesson from him”. She resumed walking.
“Wait...didn’t Caramel have a fillyfriend?” He asked, clearly confused, though the obviousness of Caramel finding “Himself” had started to dawn on him. “Was he lying and pretending to like fillies?”
She nodded. “But I bet he can explain it better than I do, we’re here!”
Pip ran up to the stallion, with a child’s enthusiasm , he sat in front of him, in the table, Caramel acknowledged Miss Cheerilee with a hoof shake. He locked at the short and young pony in front of him.
“So you’re the little Pipsqueak Cheerilee told me about?” To Pip it was weird hearing his teacher’s name without the “miss” behind it, but he nodded all the same. “I get you, want something to eat, while I tell you a story?” Pip moved his head from left to right, saying he didn’t want something. “In actuality, you’re actually kind of lucky, if you were born just a couple of decades earlier, your life would be much harder. But I understand that to a colt, this all seems very melodramatic, and knowing you’re better than people in the past isn’t a consolation.” He looked at him, the colt was paying total attention to him. “There once was a colt that felt much the same as you, in fact, he was totally full of angst, and he decided that suicide was the best option. He....died.” Caramel’s eyes were overshadowed with sadness. “In his suicide note he indicated that it was due to not being able to take it anymore, the fact of constantly being ostracized, that is. Now it was a very famous story in my time, newsworthy, the papers went on and on for days, and it scared me, for I also felt that way.” Pipsqueak was now drinking his every word, wanting to know what had happened next. “Well I didn’t kill myself, but I did something equally as destructive. I repressed myself, I held back on my feelings for a lot of colts and stallions over the years. Did it save me from being shamed by some of them? I don’t doubt it, It’s hard to be shamed when you don’t have any contact with them whatsoever, but it also brought me misery. I kept having straight relationships, and though they fulfilled my ...” he realized what he was about to say to a colt that was still underage. “...Some of my needs, they still didn’t feel right.”
“It Got to a point where I couldn’t stand the thought of ever seeing another mare again, though I tried really hard to please my fillyfriend, cause I felt that I owed her, it just didn’t work out, besides, a relationship shouldn’t be about owing something to one another, it should be
about equality.”
“Like the equality miss Cheerilee talked about in class?”
“
"Well....equality is always the same thing, that is to treat everyone equally, no matter what , but they apply to different situations. What I wanted to say was...” He looked at the boy straight into the eyes and said, with all the determination and experience of a more grown up pony.
“I don’t want you to make the same mistakes I made, while you don’t have to come out of the closet, at least know that you’re not the only colt or stallion, or male, who is gay. And really, if you need here, I’m here for you, and so is your teacher.” She (miss Cheerilee) nodded as Pip thanked him and left, she quickly followed after him, asking him if he was feeling better now.
“Yeah, but I’m now not to sure about this thing, of the closet, isn’t it sort of like lying to everypony, or at least sort of omitting it?”
“Well, Pip, your sexuality, especially when it’s not the most common of them is s a real private thing, that. If you want to do it, then do it.” She briefly stopped, hesitating. “There will always be some ponies who won’t accept you for what you are, it’s a real sad fact, but it’s the truth, but I feel that most of your classmates will accept you, after all, you are a nice boy, and a friend to them.”
Pip agreed with his teacher, this conversation had certainly given him a lot to think about. He wasn’t sure what he would do yet.
He had all the time in the word to decide, though.