A Normal Life?
I found myself lost in the woods. I started panicking and running in all directions looking for a way out. I then saw Pinkie Pie standing in a clearing. Excited for some help I ran over and tried to talk to her but when I reached her she turned to dust and was blown away in the breeze. I then could see someone else walking away and excited I ran after them. I ran and ran but I just couldn't seem to catch up with him. I was closing in on the figure when I saw my friend Josh standing in a clearing. I stopped and walked over to him. Was it really him? As I got closer I saw that it was. I ran towards him needing to tell him so much but as I got closer I saw that he looked disappointed.
"Why did you have to leave me Matt?"
"What? I...I didn't..." I couldn't speak.
"I was always there for you wasn't I? Why did you have to leave? Were you not happy living in a world with all your friends that you had to leave and abandon us all?"
"Josh please I didn't plan on this happening, it just did, I'm sorry."
Another voice came from behind me, "We all trusted you and you just left." I turned and saw my friends Jeff and Timmy walking up.
"Come on man how could you just drop everything and go to a world of peace without even saying good bye? I thought we were friends." Timmy said with hate in his voice.
"We are friends! I'm just in a different world, that doesn't mean we can't be friends still." I shouted in desperation.
"You're wrong. We aren't friends. Not anymore. Good bye forever." They all shouted in unison and then they all vanished.
Not being able to contain myself any longer I broke down and cried. I lay on the ground crying for what felt like hours. As I cried I felt a presence enter my mind. I looked up and saw Princess Luna standing over me. I stood trying to hide my tears but after what I had just seen I couldn't.
"If your here it makes sense that this is all just a dream." I said a calmly as I could.
"I'm sorry I could not have gotten here sooner, in your episode, your mind locked me out."
"It's true isn't it. They feel like I've betrayed and abandoned them don't they."
"I'm not sure... besides you I've never meet anyone else from your world." She said carefully.
"Well don't get me wrong they are good people."
"I know... when I have access to your dreams I also have access to your memories and I can see that you care for them deeply."
"Wait you have access to my memories? Does that mean..."
Luna smiled warmly, "Yes it does, I know that in your world we were nothing more than cartoon characters, and I also know that like a lot of people you felt connected to us on a deeper level. I also can see how long you wanted to leave and come to Equestria. My only question is now that you've met us all in person," Her blue eyes shimmered with amusement, "Who do you like the most?"
I blushed and with embarrassment clear in my voice, " That is an unfair question, and besides you have my mind on speed dial so why don't you look it up yourself."
Laughing she added, "I already have but you missed my point."
"Huh?"
"You are no longer feeling ashamed or at fault for something that is not your fault."
I paused and tried to piece together what had just happened, "You make a strong point, but how do I ever get over the guilt of leaving them without ever saying good bye?"
Luna thought for a moment and then said, "Well based on what I know about them, from what you know, they wouldn't think like that at all. In fact if anything they are just as sad for never getting to say good bye to you before you vanished."
I didn't know what to say next. In a way Luna knew and just sat by my side while I thought. While we sat there any question I had she would answer the best she could. This went on for hours and then eventually she told me that the night was ending and that she had to go. I felt her presence leave and myself moving to awareness. I opened my eyes just as the sun was rising and casting beautiful orange and yellow glows on the ceiling. I rolled out of bed and got ready for the day. As I was eating my breakfast I remembered that Twilight had invited me over to learn magic. She hadn't specified a time so I waited till around eleven in the morning and then I headed down to the library.
My magic lessons weren't exactly what I had thought they'd be. Here I was learning very simple spells and to make it worse I was learning them with a kid who wasn't even half my age. Applebloom kept making potions that exploded everywhere, Scootaloo left bicycle parts everywhere, and Sweetie Belle was just farther along with her magic to make me feel insignificant. As far as Twilight and I could figure I had some kind of mental block preventing me from learning more magic than I already had learned. That night I talked with Luna to see what she thought about it. After much thought and consideration we figured it was caused by a lack of balance in both my mind and my soul. The next day I went in earlier and looked through the library to find any books that could help me in my quest. After not finding anything in over an hour I was ready to give up but then I saw a biography of Star Swirled the Bearded. Curiously I picked it up and flicked through it. I noticed that the whole last chapter was ripped out, but then I saw the name of a chapter in the middle. Battling One's Self I skimmed through and saw that Star Swirled learned in order to advance your magic further you had to settle all of your inner demons and then you could grow far beyond that point. I read the chapter and learned what was needed to complete this project. I then sat the book down and got myself comfortable in a sitting position. I then closed my eyes and spoke the words associated with the spell.
I opened my eyes to see myself in the dark room full of low hanging fog and I knew I had crossed over into the astral world. Then my friends appeared and all had their backs turned. This must be the first part of my psyche I need to fix. I then proceeded to tell them what had happened as calmly as I could. One by one they all started to turn around and look at me. It was here that I truly realized that they were just as hurt by my disappearance as I had been with their absence. They then faded away and I felt part of my mind grow calm. Then my parents and brother appeared and I saw that they were sad as well. I thought about it long and hard and then I finally came to a decision. Although I couldn't expect them to understand like my friends did, I could forgive them for what they had done, and my forgiveness helped that part of my brain calm as well. As they faded others faded into my plan of existence. This time they were ponies I knew. Princess Luna was there along with Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Honey Smith. I was confused at first and couldn't think of why they would all be there. Then I realized that I had to choose one and that they were all the ponies that at one time or another I had called my favorite. I looked over at each of them, Fluttershy I ruled out right away as she was a good friend but too shy for me. Applejack was nice and all but after meeting her in person I don't think of her as anymore then just as a friend, and Twilight and I had a lot in common but not really someone I'd consider dating. Honey smith was adventurous and pretty but I doubt I'd ever see her again. This left me with Pinkie and Luna as my options. Pinkie was the reason I stayed in Ponyville and was so upbeat and happy. Luna on the other hoof was the most beautiful person I'd ever met and had an amazing mind, she gave me a reason to want to go to sleep every night. After much consideration I choose Luna as my object of affection and with that they faded away. Luna can see my memories how can I hide this from her until the right moment I thought to myself, you know just typical stupid things you think when your alone. I then noticed the fog getting lower to the floor and I thought it must be a side effect of the spell but then noticed that I was a human again and wearing all white clothes. My darker thoughts all started to disappear. Then another figure materialized on the other side of the room, he was wearing all black armor and was radiating with darkness. He drew his sword and with a deep battle cry charged me. Taken off guard I drew Eldur Innan to defend myself and my sword clashed with his. To my surprise I noticed that he had the same sword as me and it then occurred to me that he was the dark half of my mind and that I was the light half. He backed off and removed his helmet to reveal that he did in fact look just like me but with red eyes. At my thought a mirror appeared and I saw that I had Blue eyes. This would explain why I had purple eyes.
"So we're finally separate?" he growled.
"It would appear so," I replied slowly.
"It would appear as though only one of us can take control."
"Not necessarily," I said thoughtfully, "We worked together for our entire lives and if I recall most of our strength was that there was two of us."
"Yes but you never showed anyone that I was there!" He shouted angrily, "You only showed the good side of our personality, and I'm not going to hid in your shadow any longer!"
With that he flew forth and swung his sword in a diagonal slashing motion. I parried and returned with a horizontal cut towards the neck. He ducked underneath, spun, and elbowed me directly in the nose. I fell backward in pain and was only just able to roll away from his ground stabbing attack. I've never been this bad at fighting and he clearly has my ruthlessness. I thought as I came up to a stand and blocked an over head strike. Then gaining my center of balance I started to fight without emotion and I noticed I got noticeably better. But it was no match to his anger and emotion filled blows. I fell as I could no longer hold back and as he was winding up for the final blow I shouted, not in desperation, but in logic.
"If you kill me you'll be in control yes but you'll lose your ability to be happy or kind or caring or compassionate!"
The other Matt thought for a moment, "I'll live."
"You'll also lose your ability to love."
His sword was centimeters away from making contact and it slowed to a stop. "What... what makes you think I care about that?"
"Maybe you don't, but what would Luna think if I wasn't there to tell her how we feel."
With a loud roar he threw his sword and it impaled the ground. "Very well we can find a way to work together."
"Thank you," I said climbing to my feet, "I think the best thing to do would be for you to join back together with me."
"No I will never do that again!" He yelled in frustration then he thought and said, "Did you just try to strong arm me into being your slave again?"
I thought for a moment, "I think I did, did you show me mercy?"
"I did. Maybe we aren't that different after all."
Then his armor faded away and he had on the same clothes as me but his were black with white shoes. His eyes were purple again. I looked down and saw that my shoes were now black and in the mirror I saw my eyes were purple as well. We looked at each other and smiled, just like that peace had been restored and balance rained supreme. The fog vanished from the floor and we both went back to our body.
I opened my eyes and saw the library. I stood and walked outside to see what time it was. When I opened the door I saw a lot of ponies all gathered around and looking towards the library. Twilight and Zacora ran up to me and ask what had happened. Confused I said that I had done a new spell that had put my mind in balance. She then told me that I was rolling on the floor and shouting at myself, not knowing what else to do she ran and got Zacroa, when she had gotten back the whole library was exploding and flaming chunks of tree and books went everywhere. I was shocked and looked back at the ok library. Twilight continued to say that after about ten minutes of explosions all at once it all reversed and rebuilt itself then you came outside. I had no idea how to react to any of this and based on the nervous faces of those in the crowd I'd say that is accurate information. It wasn't until later when I was explaining what I had experienced to the main six, Spike, and the cutie mark crusaders that Scootaloo notice that I had gotten my cutie mark. I looked and saw that it was a Yin-Yang, I smiled and knew the meaning behind it. When asked what it meant I merely told them balance. The next two of weeks were less eventful. My magic block was gone and I excelled at an amazing rate, soon I didn't need help learning magic and I started going on my own path. I became closer with everyone in town. Although to keep myself in balance I didn't often show any emotion but when I did you knew I meant it one hundred percent. I fell into a normal routine, well when I say normal I mean a constant plan for my day. I would wake up at two o'clock in the afternoon have breakfast, go to the library and study magic, hang out or visit different ponies, and then I would stay up all night and appreciate the night sky. I would go to bed at sunrise and keep Luna company while the two of us slept. I've finished all the books in Twilight's library though, maybe I'll go and check out the library of the princess in the old castle.
"Hey what are you doing out here all by yourself?"
I turned and saw Twilight walking up, "Just enjoying the night."
"Oh ok then, well goodnight." She said with a yawn.
"Goodnight," I said as she left, "The night sure is beautiful..." I said to myself I gazed off at the stares.