//------------------------------// // Mare Do What?!? // Story: Unplanned Parenthood // by Wintergreen Diaries //------------------------------// Chapter 4: Mare Do What?!? Three months. For an active, healthy stallion, this is quite a portion of time to be without any kind of intentional stimulation, and as Cerulean woke and shivered slightly from the cold outside, he couldn’t help but feel today would a perfect day to remedy the sad situation. Besides, waking up to Twilight every morning, he usually was already partially aroused by the time his eyes opened anyways, so Twilight awoke not to a gentle embrace but some heavy stroking of her flanks. Cerulean had a knack for picking the worst possible timing for such things, as most any other day she would have had no qualms with a little play time since she herself was feeling much the same. However, when suffering from cramps that could cripple even the strongest buffalo, she found the motion quite annoying, not to mention the fact that it had brought her back to painful reality. Cerulean yanked his hoof back as Twilight smacked it away and groaned, curling slightly as the muscles in her abdomen fought tooth and nail for dominance over her pain receptors. Her stallion was fortunately smart enough to realize he should likely not pursue any further action on that front, though not without significant disappointment, and with a sigh he stood and trotted downstairs, ignoring his faintly glowing horn and trying to figure out what she might appreciate for breakfast. Selecting an assortment of fruits along with a portion of bread he had made a few days prior, he returned to his agonizing mare and quickly came to the conclusion that she was likely not to eat until the pains died down. “Twilight? It looks like they are pretty bad this morning, is there anything you’d like me to do?” She shook her head miserably before speaking up, sounding every bit as terrible as she felt. “No, just bring me my current research, please. I need something to focus on. Why don’t you just eat what you brought? I’m not going to be able to stomach anything for a while.” Cerulean nodded and walked to the edge of the railing, spying the stack of books she had mentioned and levitating them over to her in a neat stack, along with the notes she had been making. Twilight seemed disinterested in learning any conventional magic, but instead set about learning the base theories behind known spells and crafting new ones. It was fascinating, but some of the spells she had come up as of late he couldn’t imagine there being any real uses for. I mean, why would anypony make a cloud out of cotton candy that rains chocolate milk? He helped her into a sitting position so she could read and fell silent, letting her focus as he drifted off in thought. “Cerulean? Are you ok?” she asked, noticing the faint glow of his horn out of the corner of her eye. It could either mean he was still thinking about her flanks, or he was really upset about something, and she wanted to make sure she didn’t let him stew in his thoughts for too long. “It’s nothing, don’t worry about it.” Had Twilight felt better, she would have immediately tackled him for the pathetic response, but any thought of moving made the war below rise to fever pitch so she ignored it and kept reading. An hour or two later the pain started to ease, and she even found enough strength to be slightly excited as she explained her newest spell to Cerulean as he prepped to be her test subject. “Ok, here’s how it works. I have dubbed this spell the “Perfect Disguise” because it will alter your appearance in such a way that nopony will recognize you. Additionally, you won’t be able to drop out of character or speak your true name. I’ve even added a layer that converts your speech so any habits you have won’t be recognized!” “That sounds pretty interesting, Twilight. I can hardly wait to see what I look like! All right, I’m ready when you are,” Cerulean replied, sharing Twilight’s enthusiasm as best as he could. He closed his eyes and waited patiently while she gathered the necessary magic and prepped to cast the spell. Cerulean cracked open his eyes as he heard a sneeze before there was a blinding flash of light and he felt a tingling sensation over his entire body. Twilight gave a surprised gasp and drew back from him, and he tilted his head to the side. “Verily, why shouldst thou remove thyself from my presence?” he asked calmly before realizing that his question hadn’t left his mouth at all the same as he had intended. His surprise only increased as he noticed his coat was a bright orange, and without a word he dashed into the bathroom to examine himself, and Twilight plugged her ears as the scream came, loud, long, and extremely high pitched. “Twilight, wouldst thou maketh a fool of me? I’ve become a mare most fair!” he, or rather now she, exclaimed. As he motioned his body to angrily pound his hoof into the floor, he instead fell to the floor sobbing as the spell overwrote his intended actions with its own. Twilight examined her to see that she was indeed now a unicorn mare, and a pretty one at that. Her mane and tail were worn in tight braids, like something one of the apple family mares would wear, though in color they were a deep violet like her eyes. “Cerulean, I had no idea the spell would go this far. Unfortunately, I let out a lot more magic than I meant to for a test.” The mare ceased her fit and stood, taking a moment to examine herself more thoroughly and finding something quite lacking in her nether regions, and paled visibly. “Twilight, what wouldst thou insinuate?” “I’m afraid you’re going to be that way for a while, I never designed a spell to cancel the effects. Although,” she paused, perking up, “this just gives us more of a chance to explore the spell in greater detail! Come to think of it, what’s your name?” “Thou wouldst even dare to ask? Hast thou forgotten so easily? Tis Mandarin, Mandarin Seas.” This was great, just freaking fantastic! I wake up, get rejected, and then lose my junk by mid day. Could this get any worse? “Oh, I forgot! The weekly shopping needs to get done, so this will be a perfect chance to see how you interact with other ponies! Here, take this list, and make sure you get everything. I’ll see you when you get back, and remember as much as you can about how other ponies respond to your disguise.” Mandarin glared at Twilight for a moment before stalking downstairs and out the door, passing a confused Spike who had been downstairs and thus missed the transformation. Mandarin sullenly looked over the list, convinced that Twilight had doubled the amount of items she was to procure simply to give her more time in the public eye. She had already noticed an inordinate number of excited glances and whispers rising from the stallions she passed by, both taken and not, which caused no small amount of consternation on her part. Blocking out the chatter she made her way hurriedly to appropriate stall and attempted to make the first purchase. “Excuse me, sir, might I be permitted to purchase some of your fine lemons?” “Lemons, for a sweet little lady like you? Are you sure you don’t want something a little more soothing to the tongue?” “I do not approve of the tone with which thou speakest unto me. Please, three lemons and I shall be on my way.” Mandarin took a step back as the store owner gave her what he perceived was a winning smile, though it came across more as the suggestive leer that it was. “Oh, playin’ coy, aren’t we? Have it your way, lass. That’ll be twleve bits. Unless of course you’d talk kindly to me, in which case we may be able to come to an agreement.” What the hay is wrong with everypony? Are all the remaining stallions in Ponyville really this perverted that they would use extortion just to try and get some? Gah, no wonder Applejack is afraid of morons like this! “I’m still waiting, miss.” Mandarin sauntered over and placed her hooves against the owner’s chest, pushing him to the ground and causing everypony to stare open mouthed. If she was going to have to be stuck as a female, she might as well use it, right? Unfortunately, his control was temporarily removed as the spell took over, causing no small amount of fear on his part. “Oh, forgive me, kind sir. I have erred greatly, and shall seek to, how shall we say... rectify the situation?” Now listen here, I am a freaking stallion, and I don’t appreciate you desire to stick your... Mandarin said, stroking his chest and bringing her lips close to his. It took all her wait, something’s wrong. That wasn’t what I meant to say at all! What am I doing? Oh, effort to not hurl all over his face as she felt his heart begin to race at the word “rectify,” and she gross, I can’t believe how excited this stallion is getting right now, I think I’m gonna retch. stopped just short, holding the position for a few seconds before whipping upright and slamming Please tell me I’m not going to... seduce him? No way! There’s no way I’m going to let a hoof between his legs, eliciting a chorus of pained groans from the onlookers, and a few that happen! Ouch, ok, wasn’t expecting that, given my assigned personality, but that cheers from the mares that had been harassed more than once by the stallion. He, on his part, was strangely gratifying. I do feel bad, though. With that much force, he’s going to be doubled over in pain and did hurl, and Mandarin laid six bits down on the table, stowed three down for quite some time. Hey, I think I feel control coming back... That wasn’t nearly as lemons in her bag, and tried to leave but was immediately assailed by the jubilant crowd that had bad as I thought it would be. This could actually be pretty dang fun. witnessed the event. “Wow, that was amazing! He’s had that coming for a long time, way to go!” “I wish I could have been the one to do that!” “Verily, I cannot stand cretins such as him. I will not tolerate such debauchery in my presence. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some shopping to do,” Mandarin replied with a snort, trotting a short distance before an overly eager stallion called out behind her and froze her in her tracks. “Hey, do you have a coltfriend?” Cerulean wanted to scream “I’m a stallion!” but the spell stopped the line of thought after the first word after each time he tried to summon the courage to do so. “I’ll be your fillyfriend!” one mare cried, eliciting a few strange looks before they turned their attention to their new favorite mare. “I’m sorry, but I...” Cerulean felt the spell begin to react and he knew Mandarin was gonna land him in a world of trouble. “Please, just one date!” another stallion cried as the number of ponies around Mandarin continued to grow. Desperate, Cerulean teleported away and made towards the library with all haste. Haste, however, tends to rob one of the powers of observation, and thus it was that Mandarin found herself sharing a fleeting moment of passion with the door that had swung open right in front of her. Big Macintosh looked down in shock as an orange horn suddenly punctured the door with a loud crack. He waited for it to withdraw, but after a few seconds he looked on the other side to find a poor mare that was slumped against the door, noting her pleasant features and the throng of ponies in the distance. He instantly put the two together and, hoisting the unconscious lady onto his back, he snuck out of city limits and circled around, back towards Sweet Apple Acres. “Uh, Big Macintosh? Who’s the mare?” He turned to seeing Applejack eyeing him curiously as he attempted to sneak into the house unseen. It wasn’t that he was sorry for bringer Mandarin back, but rather the fact that he wouldn’t be able to deny any allegations made concerning his interest in her. “She had an accident in town, ‘n I felt bad ‘bout it. Besides, ah think some ponies were chasin’ her, an’ I didn’t want her to wake up surrounded.” “Ever the gentlecolt, eh Big Mac? You sure there ain’t more t’ the story?” He said nothing and continued up to his room, hoping his red coat would hide the flush he felt in his cheeks. After setting the mare down in bed, he ran to fetch some ice and tend to the large lump in the center of her forehead. The earth pony swallowed as he felt his heart begin to race in a way that hadn’t happened since the last time he had been close to kissing Miss Cheerilee, and he slowly drew up beside the bed, hesitating a moment before crawling in beside her and draping a hoof lightly across her shoulders. He told himself it would just be for a few moments, but after a morning of wrestling with Quakehoof and an afternoon of clearing snow to come, he soon drifted into a doze. “Twi? Is it all right for me to come up?” Applejack called out from the entrance of the library, and Spike came down to lead her in. “Hey there, Spike. She upstairs?” “Yeah, but it’s strange that Cerulean isn’t with her.” Applejack was slightly disappointed, as she had been hoping to see him in passing, but she made her way upstairs and set down the delivery of apple sweets by the bed. “Thanks, Applejack. I haven’t been able to keep much down as of late, but there’s something about your cooking that eases the pain.” “Don’t worry ‘bout it, Twi. I’m glad I could help. If ya don’t mind me askin,’ where’s Cerulean?” “Oh, well I think you mean Mandarin,” she said, giggling at the confusion in Applejack’s face. “I tried out a new disguise spell this morning, and it turned him into a rather fetching mare. Orange coat, violet mane. He’s supposed to be doing the shopping, but he hasn’t come home yet. Applejack, what’s the look for?” “Big Macintosh came home with an unconscious mare matching that description just before I came over! Now ah don’t wanna jump t’ any conclusions, but I’d say he was quite taken by her. And if that’s really Cerulean, then... Oh Celestia, don’t do anythin’ Big Mac!” she yelled, tearing out the door as Twilight sent her away with her laughter riding after the terror stricken farm mare. Cerulean was pretty sure he had broken his horn, or at least fractured it when he had rammed into the door, and he made no motion to move or open his eyes as the pounding headache came to wake him. Twilight’s arms felt much heavier than normal, but he was grateful for the comfort and rolled over, squeezing her tighter and noting that she seemed much larger than he remembered. Cerulean’s, or rather Mandarin’s, eyes snapped open when he felt something shift under the covers and found himself looking into Big Mac’s amorous eyes, and his brain immediately screamed for all its worth. Unfortunately, the spell again took hold of the reigns and translated the motion into an elated sigh. Her cheeks were turning a delightful shade of pink, and realizing that he had fallen asleep and was likely to frighten the mare, he was about to leave the bed when heard the sigh and froze. “Excuse me, miss, but ah...” he started before the mare began whispering into his ear. “Thou must be the gallant stallion who hath saved me from the overzealous masses in the This can’t be happening, this can’t be happening! C’mon, brain, fight the magic! I’ll never market over yonder. Verily, I believe I owe a great deal of gratitude to you. I would know your live it down if something happens! I’ve never seen Big Mac act like this, wait, what the... name, if I may?” why did I ask his name? “Big Mac, miss...” he whispered as the mare gently ran her tongue along the length of his neck Oh no... No, no no no, this cannot be happening! What the hay... He tastes kinda good... and started to nibble on his ear. Big Mac lay paralyzed, having never experienced anything like it No, stoppit! No thoughts! Twilight, I swear I’ll get you for this if it’s the last thing I do! before. “How rude of me, my name is Mandarin. It is a... pleasure, Big Mac.” And with that, Mandarin Rude? Being forced to act interested in a stallion, now that’s rude! Wait, what am I... Oh rolled over on top of him and gave him a lesson in oral dexterity. Big Mac hesitated a moment buck me, this can’t be happening! I can feel it... and his tongue. Wow, he sure adapts before caving and returning the advance. He gave a slight grunt as Mandarin’s hoof dropped to fast... I would have thought that he would have been a tad more... shy, about it. Oh... I his flank, pulling him closer. Mandarin gave a dainty gasp as Big Mac was overcome and totally just did, I’m touching his... Somepony, just kill me now... It can’t possibly get any returned the motion, and she rolled him onto his back and stood over him for a moment. They worse than OH NO I AM NOT! THIS CANNOT POSSIBLY BE HAPPENING! I will not both closed their eyes and continued kissing, both unaware of the magical aura building around sleep with a stallion, no matter how strong, tasty, and... GAH! Mind, turn OFF! Mandarin’s body. “Big Mac, don’t lay a hoof on...” Applejack shouted, busting into the room and stopping in her tracks. Cerulean lay atop her brother quite obviously tongue locked with Big Mac, both of them blushing and completely unaware that the spell had worn off. “Cerulean, stop, you ain’t a mare no more,” she commanded, averting her gaze and screwing her eyes shut. Both stallions opened their eyes, and out of sheer desperation, Big Mac shot all legs into the air, sending Cerulean crashing through the roof and landing in a heap a good twenty feet away. “Was that your first time anythin’ like that has happened, big brother?” Applejack asked softly as they both walked to the window to see Cerulean laying in a small crater, twitching slightly and covered by pieces of debris. Big Mac grew furious and slammed his head against the wall before responding, heaving a large sigh and determining to have a sound word with Twilight on the issue later. “Eeeyup... That was mah first time findin’ a stallion atop o’ me. What the hay was he thinkin, Applejack?” “If I ‘ad t’ guess, probably ‘somepony, make it stop!’” she replied with a nervous chuckle. “Twilight cast some sort of spell on ‘im. Was meant to act like a disguise, but ah think it went a little further.” “Eeeyup.” A normally gentle stallion entered the door with a slam, causing Twilight to look up from her books. Her excitement at being free of her cramps for a time combined with not having seen Cerulean all day clashed with the fearful scowl he wore as he stomped up the steps, marching up to her and causing her to shift nervously as he fixed her with a piercing gaze. “Cerulean, did something happen?” He responded by giving her an extremely unexpected, sudden, deep and very wet kiss. She would have enjoyed it but something seemed off. “What is that taste?” Twilight asked as Cerulean turned and stalked towards the shower. He paused in the doorway and glanced at her over the corner of his eye. “That, my dear mare, would be Big Mac. Enjoy.” He allowed himself an amused smirk as he heard Twilight sputter behind him, groaning in disgust as she realized what had happened and made a note to never, ever, use the spell again.