//------------------------------// // Ponyville vs Squirrel Jensen(Part 2/Aftermath) // Story: Gods and Fishing Lines // by Dancing Question //------------------------------// It was roughly around that time that the squirrel got sent flying behind us. As the squirrel’s shield turned a shade of gray, it turned out that it got hit by a high velocity fainting couch, which stopped at a very angry looking mud covered unicorn. Presumably, this unicorn is Rarity if what Pinkie Pie said is any indication. If I had known that was coming, I would have had at least one javelin ready. “This is unforgivable. Out of all the things in Ponyville that squirrel could have stomped on, it picked THE WORST POSSIBLE THING. Such a crime against fabulosity cannot go unpunished,” the mud covered unicorn said as her voice ran the emotional spectrum before settling into a knight templar’s certitude. I ignored whatever discussion was about to ensue when I went after the squirrel trying to get into javelin range. Shields do recharge after all. Unfortunately, impersonating Leroy Jenkins wasn’t going to work. Twilight teleported in front of me as Applejack caught up with me, soon followed by the rest of the party. Given her demonstrated ability to teleport others, I stopped. “What do yah think yer doin, chargin off alone like that?” Applejack responded to my attempt at impersonating an internet meme. Of course, there was a perfectly good secondary point to me charging off like that. If they followed me, the shield might go down that much faster. Of course, that hinged on them stopping the conversation and ATTACKING. “Bringing down the shield, before it RECHARGES,” I said as I rushed past Twilight and conjured another javelin. Of course, by that time, the squirrel had gotten to its feet after being catapulted by that high speed fainting couch and was chasing bystanders unfortunate enough to still be on the streets. I think I may have even seen one or two of them get mauled. Thankfully, Twilight had enough sense to teleport onto a roof in the squirrel’s path and start firing off red lightsaber colored energy blasts that began knocking it in my direction and turning its shield back to the shade of gray it was when Rarity hit it with that couch. 3 Javelins and another cannon blast of party supplies later (I’m starting to think Pinkie Pie is an exceptionally friendly eldritch abomination with how she gets around so quickly) later, the shield was down and Twilight hit it with a sleep spell after she teleported near me to fire one off. The giant magitech cyborg squirrel went out like a light. I found myself panting and tried to get my breathing back under control as the rest of the party caught up with us or came out of hiding, I’m not sure which. Then there was the telltale flare of orange light as the ponies with the bee masks teleported in front of the now sleeping squirrel. “Well, you’ve given us some useful data miss Sparkle,” one of them said. “All this damage, and that’s all this is to you two? An experi-“ “HOW DARE YOU!” Fluttershy shouted as she flew between us and them “Taking innocent animals and turning them into weapons, your families must be ashamed of you. Now why don’t you take the masks of-,” They didn’t seem to be very effected by Fluttershy chewing them out. “We don’t expect you to understand. What we’ve done is revolutionary. Were you paying attention? Can’t you see the implications of our work becoming widespread?” Oh dear god they’re pony transhumanists. Wait a minute, that doesn’t make sense. Maybe… transponyists? Don’t get me wrong, I like the ideas their type talk about, I’ve beaten Deus Ex and all that jazz, but they’re doing it so wrong they’re either morons or agent provocateurs. But who would want to discredit transh-, I mean transponyism like this? “You never once pondered what this research could do did you? You even tried to get us to take our masks off. Such foalishness. You were the most unexpected thorn in our side, but we will take great pleasure in relieving you of that burden,” one of the ponies in the bee masks said as orange points of light danced around him near the ground. Those points of light began streaming out chains of orange energy at high speeds that completely immobilized Fluttershy in seconds as fireballs started floating around the other masked pony. Such a brazen kidnapping attempt led to Twilight getting mad enough to set herself on fire again. Except this time, she had as many issues with power management as I did, because the air temperature started feeling like a sauna when it happened. Twilight quickly managed to disrupt the links of the chains that connected to the points of light with a spell before she had to shield herself the fireball pony's attack, who had by then teleported on a rooftop behind her. Luckily, she found a way to absorb the heat of them into her shield when they made impact, preventing them from setting Ponyville ablaze. I am so out of my depth here it isn’t even funny. Twilight quickly teleported to that ponies location, and used a force blast that sent him flying and totaled what remained of the roof after the squirrel stomped on it, before teleporting back to ground level and using another blast that could take a chunk out of a building to send the pony who had conjured the chains flying down the street. The chain using pony somehow managed to cushion his impact, and started to get up. Unfortunately, it looked like Twilight was using her rage mode to fuel those blasts, because her flames died down and she was covered in scorch marks. I took that moment to try finding a good line of fire and conjure more javelins, while the mud covered unicorn I’m assuming is Rarity and Applejack took the opportunity to untie Fluttershy/ get her the fark out of there. This was a very good thing, because I think Fluttershy may have been experiencing a blue screen of death at the moment, especially because the situation had confirmed Twilight’s theory. Seeing the artificial musculature on that squirrel melt like candle wax wasn’t pretty. Thankfully for the squirrel, Twilight either used a VERY good sleep spell, or they didn’t put any pain receptors in the squirrel’s artificial limbs, because its own musculature melting like that didn’t wake it up. When the ponies in the bee masks took the field again, they teleported in back to back and they were both limping, but they had a shield ready the moment I started using javelins. Combine that with the fireballs intermingled with points of orange light surrounding them, and things were going to go south real bad, real fast. There was even the suitably dramatic roaring of stormclouds to accentuate just how bad the situation was. “Hey mister crazy ponies!” Pinkie Pie shouted from a rooftop. “I’m not sure what kind of game you’re trying to play, but you might want to stop playing now!” she continued. “And why would we do that?” one of the masked ponies asked. I looked up to see Rainbow Dash with a pair of pegasus ponies in flight suits I didn’t recognize. “Because we’ve got you surrou-,” one of the flight suited pegasi said. Before the pegasus could finish her sentence, the masked ponies fired a red beam at the squirrel that disintegrated it and teleported away. The two flight suited pegasi and another one that was hiding behind the cloud split up in what looked like a search pattern as Rainbow Dash landed. “That was so awesome! We sure told them! And can you believe it? Princess Celestia actually sent the Wonderbolts to help us,” Rainbow Dash said in a tone I’d typically associate with squeeing fangirls before she got a confused look on her face, “um, who were those ponies anyway?” “They were wearing masks that altered their voices. The only clue we have is that their magic is orange and that they may be limping,” Twilight responded, somehow having no scorch marks on her whatsoever. That’s when the three ponies in flight suits returned from their searching. Two of them started loading the mauled ponies onto a cart that had two ponies with medical looking cutie marks near it. “We didn’t see them anywhere nearby, is everypony okay?” The one with a mane that resembled open flame despite generating no heat asked us. I’m not sure if I was crazy from the dehydration of walking into a sauna, if it was fact I hadn’t gotten this much exercise in weeks, or the adrenaline, but I started laughing like a madman. Then everything went black. When I came to I was in Twilight’s library on one of those fainting couches the muddy unicorn I’m assuming is Rarity summoned. Of course, none of the ponies were covered in mud now, so I’m assuming she cleaned up if she’s in the room. Rainbow Dash was apparently explaining to the rest of them what had happened when she went looking for stormclouds and why it took longer than she thought, with some details that absolutely HAD to be exaggerated. “How long was I out?” I mumbled as I started to get up. Before I knew it, Fluttershy was there. “You’re very dehydrated, you need to drink something,” she said as she disappeared and before I realized anything else I was sitting back down and bracing a glass of water against my mouth with my hoof. After the 5th glass, Fluttershy finally stopped bringing them and I was able to join the conversation. “If you don’t mind my butting in, what happened?” I asked to nopony in particular. “Oooh, I’ll explain it!” Pinkie Pie shouted, raising her hoof. “Well, there was a giant squirrel-“ “Pinkie Pie,” Twilight said with a forced calm in her voice “Yes, Twilight?” Pinkie Pie responded, and I have a sneaking suspicion she’d be wearing a trollface mask if she had one. “I don’t think he means that far back,” Twilight told her. “Well, you fell asleep after giggling at a ghostie nopony could see,” Pinkie Pie said, cutting to the chase now, “Then Twilight and Spitfire got you into the library and Twilight cast a temporary hydration spell on you. And then the Wonderbolts had to leave to tell Princess Celestia what happened. Then Twilight brought the rest of the girls here and you woke up an hour later when Rainbow Dash was explaining what happened when she went looking for stormclouds, and Fluttershy made you drink a lot of,” “Ah think he gets it,” Applejack deadpanned before she asked me, “So, ‘Binary’, what’s yer story?” Well, at least I can get the rest of the introductions out of the way simultaneously. But on the other hand, how could I put this without making Twilight sound like a complete monster? “Twilight already told you about the summoning she tried last night?” I asked Applejack. She nodded. “Judging from the air quotes you used around my name, you already figured out that Binary is a pseudonym. Explaining this during a giant squirrel attack seemed like a very bad idea, but I’m actually human, and humans exposed to this worlds magic turn into ponies. My real name’s Garrett.” “Not that we aren’t ungrateful for your contribution,” the white unicorn who is probably Rarity by process of elimination interjected, “but that doesn’t explain why you’re still here.” I was hoping to avoid this. I guess I’ll just be as vague as I possibly can. “Time flow differences. Sending me back properly would need a TARDIS.” “A what?” Applejack asked. “A time machine. Since time travel is impossible, I’m stuck here and I’ve been living out of Twilight’s storage room. Any other questions?” “You explained it well enough, but listen, If you need money, feel free to come by my Boutique. I’m sure I could figure out something for a unicorn with your skillset." “Thank you, I might just take you up on that,” I told her. “Why,” I thought I heard somebody whisper. “Huh? Did somepony say something?” I asked. “Why would anypony do that to an animal?!” Fluttershy said in a surprisingly loud emotional outburst. To see if it would work before they did it to ponies?” I asked casually. Somehow that raised the tension in the room. “Alright Binary, I’m only going to ask this once. How can you talk about things like that and think it’s normal?” Applejack asked me. “Hey, there are stories out there that talk about that. None of them like what those masked ponies did, and not very many of them, but the idea isn’t new,” Twilight interjected. “If you could replace your limbs with artificial ones that were better than the original ones, would you?” I asked Applejack. “Ah worked hard to be where I am today. Buying strength just don’t sound right, you wouldn’t appreciate it if you could just buy it.” “I guess we’ll have to agree to disagree there, because if I didn’t take the opportunity, I’d be seriously considering it, and I’d want others to have that opportunity too. Those masked ponies could very well agree with me, but I want to see them brought to justice for their atrocities too, especially because they’re stigmatizing just what this kind of technology could do. Forcing that kind of change on anyone is just sick.” “Ah’ll say, glad we can agree on that,” Applejack said, mollified by my remarks. “Now, are we pondering angles to begin our own investigation or what?” I asked the room. “We’re too well known, we’d be walking targets if we started investigating, and I do not want to run into those masked ponies again without a squad of royal guards or one of the Princesses. We should leave this to the professionals.” Twilight said. Despite my agreeing with her on ideal conditions for fighting those two ponies, does she watch movies? At all? Now we’re going to be involved in this whether we like it or not. “WHAT?!” Rainbow Dash shouted. “They tried to kidnap Fluttershy and you want to let the royal guards handle it? They couldn’t handle Nightmare Moon! When there was a dragon Princess Celestia needed moving, she sent us! And don’t even get me started on Discord. Those masked ponies, or whoever is pulling their strings, are just as bad as they are, and we need to stop them ourselves if we want to see it happen! ” She shouted. “Alright Rainbow Dash, where should we start? With the squirrel that isn’t there anymore? With the masked ponies that the only thing we know about them is their orange magic, and they may be limping? The masked ponies who could be anywhere by now?” Twilight interjected. “We could always try following the money; that usually works,” I suggested. “Do you really think we’d have the access for that?” Twilight asked me sarcastically. “Emotions are running high right now; maybe we should go home and see what happens in the morning,” the white unicorn suggested “Rarity?” I asked to the room because I wanted to confirm her name. “Hm?” The white unicorn replied “That is the best idea I’ve heard all day.” “I like that idea too,” Twilight said. Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash were the last ones to leave. Fluttershy still seemed… frazzled by what happened. When Rainbow Dash left, she followed her. Ah well, now it’s time to get to the elephant in the room. “What I was saying before you stormed out. There were at least 5 better ways I could have put that, and with how I reacted to those masked ponies…,” Twilight trailed off awkwardly. “People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones?” I suggested. She thought about it for a moment. “I suppose that’s one way to put it. I do know some power management exercises I could take you through; and your issues with that were probably a factor in that blackout you had. Of course, you may need to wait until tomorrow for your magic reserves to build back up, you don’t look like you have very much power to manage right now anyway.” “Thanks, and I’m beginning to think I may have stormed off hastily. I didn’t realize that you were agreeing with me when I overreacted. I was an idiot, and I’m sorry about that,” I apologized. “It’s very hard to stay mad at somepony who helped you deal with a rampaging giant squirrel,” she said with a completely straight face. “I don’t think I could have put it better myself, even with a week to figure it out,” I said with the hint of a giggle on my voice. Spike suddenly burped up what looked like a bag with a note attached to it. Garrett, Enclosed in this bag are the agreed upon 2000 bits. The guards in the secure portions of the Canterlot Archives have orders to grant entry to any unicorns matching your description who know the password ‘glacies’. If you wish to take something out of the archives, Spike knows where to send the requests. I trust this matter is now closed. -Princess Celestia This created message will dispel upon reading. Dang. I wish I thought of that before just now, when I saw a message like that disappear. For a government official, that was surprisingly fast. Does she have a slush fund for weird things that happen in Ponyville or something? Then I opened the bag and looked inside. It was bigger on the inside than the outside. Celestia casually threw in a BAG OF HOLDING. Of course, with what I had to go through to live long enough to receive them, this may as well be a quest reward. That’s when I started laughing again. Maybe I'm a bit frazzled or unhinged, or whatever term fits the situation. "Are you okay?" Spike asked me "You'd need to play a lot of RPG's to have any idea why I'm laughing. I may have seen two ponies die today, I've seen a squirrel's musculature get melted after being chased by the same squirrel, Fluttershy almost got kidnapped, and I didn't have enough magical firepower to do anything to stop it. I'd be more disturbed if I wasn't at least slightly unhinged from the experience and laughing over something completely trivial," I told him. "I haven't written my report to Princess Celestia yet, could you tell me again what happened when you encountered the masked ponies?" "Hospitals," I said. "What?" Twilight asked me. "They seemed too competent for something this stupid, but if we're VERY lucky, they might have found medical attention wherever they teleported to after they unmasked, after all, I think I saw them limping too." "Alright, so we're reporting to her that the ponies had orange magic and a possible limp. That's not much to go on. Could you tell me again what happened when you ran into them? You might realize something you forgot." Several repetitions of my story later, Twilight finally stopped asking me. I get the idea of what she was doing, trying to jar loose details I may have forgotten before, but it was still annoying. So I was very glad to hear her say this. "Spike, take a letter. Dear Princess Celestia....." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Author Note: Special thanks to Chaosglory626 and Ponyaddict for prereading an early version of this chapter. This chapter was dark enough to deserve adding the tag, and I'm wondering if I did this organically or plausibly. I've got plot points in mind for later in the story, but I've got a lot of directions I could go to bridge the gap between now and my later in the story plot points, and no particular plan in mind for how to do it, so my next update may take a while. Or it might not. I have no idea. As always, if you notice any errors, I'd appreciate hearing about them.