The Everfree Effect by VelvetHeart
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"Oh, oh no!" The cry of the pegasus faded to a little whimper as she landed beside the package, which now lay among the flowers of the Everfree, badly-dented. Carefully, she lifted it, met by the ominous crunchy noise of shattered pottery. Derpy felt her lip begin to quiver as she sat down, tears barely held back. She'd done it again! Broken! And she thought she'd been so smart in taking a shortcut over the Everfree to get to Rarity's from Fluttershy.
How was she ever going to explain this? Whatever was in this had to have been completely ruined by the crash!
Still, it was her duty to deliver it, and somehow suffer the shame and tears of yet another valuable delivery ruined.
...but... she could wait until tomorrow. She knew she was in for it, but she could at least delay the likely verbal thrashing she was going to receive for that long...
* * *
Ding! Rarity's doorbell was a cheerful little chime, announcing every arrival as a potential customer. Before she'd so much as registered the sound, she was up on her hooves with the usual catchphrase on her lips; "Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where everything is chique, unique and whoah!"
Leaned against her doorframe was a massive pegasus, the frame in question audibly complaining about the weight brought to bare against it. The gigantic stallion towered over her as if he were born of the same mold as Celestia herself, but oh so very obviously male. "Greetings, young lady Rarity," the grey stallion rumbled with a voice that, had it ever been used for more than a paragraph, would've caused every mare in earshot to spontaneously cream herself. "I have a package for you, but I'm afraid it's far, far too thick to fit through your front slot."
The doorframe groaned as he righted himself, looking down upon Rarity from on high with a thigh-wettening pair of golden eyes. "But if you'll let me in, I'll bring it around, and push it in your... back door."
"W-w-why yes, of course!" Rarity felt her tail quiver, which turned out to be a minor thing compared to the heat in her cheeks, and... pretty much everywhere else.
A simple step and the masculine titan simply walked over Rarity, barely brushing her in passing but forcing her to duck to avoid getting an unintentional faceful of his most personal package - an action Rarity immediately regretted.
"Where would you like it?" The grey pegasus rumbled, looking through the room.
"Oh! I- I mean... ohh... Over the kitchen table, please!" Rarity flung herself forward, forehooves pressed to the firm surface, hindlegs spread and tail pushed aside, quivering with need.
She heard the back door open, a grunt... and suddenly she felt something pressed against her snout: The surface of some kind of huge, badly-dented cardboard box, which had suddenly decided to take up most of the space on her kitchen table.
"Thank you for your time, young lady Rarity. I'll continue on my route now."
Confused, dazed, and apparently sharing a table with a thoroughly-smashed box of Fluttershy's porcelainware, Rarity watched the muscular superstallion fly off, golden mane and tail flying in the wind.
"...fuck..."
* * *
Aloe could've sworn Ponyville didn't have any stallions quite so physically-perfect as the glorious beast that just walked through the spa door, but she wasn't going to complain. "Ah- ehm, I mean... What would you like, here, I mean. Sir. " She could already feel a blush coming on.
"I need to take a dip in your hottest, deepest pool, Aloe. You should get your sister, too. It's going to get... wet and steamy."
* * *
Vera sighed, seated next to her sister, both of them looking rather disappointed. "We should've known he was here for the poison joke cure."
"You don't suppose Derpy would, perhaps, maybe, be willing to fall into poison joke again? Maybe for a date?"