Chapter 11
Fears
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I don't even know these feelings in my heart. After Melody and I returned from our first major job, things have been different. I have been walking around with my new haircut and noticing how everyone would wave at me or talk to me for a while. Some even question how Melody was doing, I would answer that she's healing and I thanked them for their concerns.
Slowly and surly Melody had been getting better and the longer I stayed in that tavern, the more confused and scared I get. It's not Melody, it's not the small jobs I get assigned by Skytalon, a whole lot worse than those. I was starting to have strange dreams and feelings for Diamond. When I leave my room every morning and sit at the bar, she would be there talking to Berry about the stock of the ingredients for her soups and the drink. Her beautiful face smiling when Berry told her a joke, the beautiful blue orbs that just looked like pools of clean blue water, and her lips.
I was very scared in thinking such thoughts. I mean before they weren't so serious but then, I couldn't stop dreaming up her face, I couldn't stop seeing her face through my eyelids when I sleep. I just couldn't stop thinking about her!
After she gave me the gift of hand sewn clothes, it was just too much to ignore and the light kisses she would give me on the cheek or even my forehead, they were gentle sweet kisses but her eyes and hands convened something more. As I was thinking of perhaps returning these signs of affection, I would suddenly remember those words that haunt me.
She's a whore! I would be damned if I love her back!
But does she really like me?
Is she toying with me with these fake feelings?
Hearing these thoughts in my mind made me sit back in my seat, hiding my face from Diamond or I just get up and run away.
I always went to Tinker's barn to take care of Twilight during these times of fear and hurt. Twilight seemed to notice my distress and tried to get me to smile. Just hanging around the mare seemed to ease my anxieties about Diamond. Some days Velvet would come over carrying feed sacks for Tinker's mule and for ... My horse. It's still hard thinking that Twilight is now my horse when in truth I'm just caring for her for Velvet.
Velvet always looked haggard and tired when she does her small short visits. She does smile and brighten up in seeing Twilight again, but it seemed that when she leaves, she dreaded it. I fear for Velvet's situation the longer I stood by. But the truth was, I'm not a true deputy, I'm just a hired gun. If I could I would pull out my revolver and shoot that son of a bitch ....I froze at that moment and those vivid memories of the dead man returned, haunting me again. He never did leave me.
Days went by since my first job, Melody was slowly recovering painfully. She was told by the doctor to drink whiskey to dull her pain, which worked once but Melody was different when she drank so I told her not to drink anymore. She stopped but couldn't stop pestering me that I was making her suffer.
I finally got to see Ace Kicker for the first time in a long while. We sat down at the corner table and chat over gumbo, I really liked that stuff. I asked how he was doing and such, he answered that he was fine. Then he asked me how I was doing. I answered that I had been better. We shared drinks from a whiskey bottle then it was closing time. Ace said he was going to check on Tinker then he'll be off for a while.
I asked him where he was going, he just winked at me and said: "It's none of your concern. I'll be back. Take care of Tinker for me?" I nodded and told him I will. When he walked past me, he paused and placed his hand on my shoulder. He told me at that moment that I was the only person he trusted with Tinker. That got me scared. I looked at him to see his sad eyes as he tipped his hat and left the bar. I watched him leave and I started to fear for him.
What was Ace going to do?
A week after Ace left Frontier City, things have been boring. I never thought I would say that word, but things had been slow. Skytalon hadn't hired me for jobs, I didn't know why, but I did notice that Lucky, Kim and Dash weren't out either. Mac and Darius were usually the ones out doing some special jobs that I didn't know about.
The three guns do come and visit the Sweetie Belle tavern asking about Melody and how she was doing. I would answer that she just complains in bed. The doctor was specific that Melody must stay in bed for another few days before getting active again. Which she didn't seem to mind at all. I would walk into Melody's room, just to talk and do something during this boring time, and I find her talking to Rose and they would be engaged in conversation. I just left them alone. At least Melody was doing well, so why ruin that?
The second month of spring had come and it was nice to sit on the wooden bench outside of the Sweetie Belle and just enjoy the clean air and the sunshine. It seemed that nothing would ruin this day....
Or I might have spoken too soon.
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"Daemons! Daemons of Chaos!"
Annie blinked open her eyes hearing the cry. She sat up, pushing back her hat form her eyes to see a familiar group of people.
"Salvation my good people! Salvation from the evil acts of Discord and his chaos and sinful ways!"
"What the devil was that?" Lucky asked. Annie turned to see Lucky, she just left the tavern since the doors were just closing behind her. Annie gulped.
"The church." Lucky blinked at the answer.
"Huh?" Lucky asked then stepped toward the steps, turning to see the mass of twenty people dressed in black clothes walking down the street. The man in the lead was holding the holy book in his hand. The men were dressed in black suits, pants, boots, and bowler hats on their heads. The women were dressed in long black dresses, with black or white bonnets on their heads, and black shoes.
Annie recognized them. They're from the same church she used to go to as a young girl. She was always scared of these people. Those that judge instantly and purge people of their rights to living. Annie gulped standing up with Lucky. One group walked to the other three taverns in town screaming the Horse God's law. It was scary to watch, even Lucky was intimidated to see several of the group walked straight towards them. Mainly women.
"Move aside!" The lead lady snapped. Annie blinked seeing her light green eyes and her pink hair from under the bonnet. Annie and Lucky immediately stepped away from the woman as the group marched into the tavern. The two women looked at one another afraid. Lucky gulped.
"I'm out." Lucky ran off, probably out looking for Kim and Dash. Annie went back inside and saw the chaos.
Rose stopped playing her piano and stood up as two women hound her. The men and women at the tables left their tables holding up their hands as these women were yelling and scolding them. Annie blinked seeing Berry looking at a finger wagging in her face.
"What by Great Titania is going on here?!" Annie turned hearing Diamond's roar as she stepped down the steps from upstairs. Many of the working girls and their customers looked down. The men seeing the women immediately pulled on their shirts to show decency to the well dressed women downstairs. Others just bolted for the side door.
The pink haired woman walked straight to her. "So are you the owner of this establishment?"
Diamond sniffed glaring. "I am, and who are you?" Diamond said stepping to the ground floor standing before the younger woman.
"I am Mistress Constance Temple. My husband is Minister James Temple, of the Horse Guardians Church. We are here to purge this place of sin. And this place is full of horrible sin!" The woman growled.
Diamond glared at her. "Well I am sorry you find my establishment offensive."
"You shouldn't be sorry to me, you should go down on your knees and beg for it!"
Annie and several others glared at the woman. Berry growled.
"Hey lady! If you want to flap your trap, you get out of the building."
"Excuse me?" Constance said glaring at the bartender.
"She is right," Diamond said primly. "I'm open to all types of people but if you are just going to be here and wag that big tongue of yours then I'll ask you to leave." Diamond said trying hard to be as civil as possible.
Constance glared at Diamond for a long moment then sniffed.
"You have until Easter Sunday to pray for forgiveness." She walked to the door. "Come along sisters, let us leave this filthy place."
The woman walked to the door glaring at Diamond before leaving. Constance kept her frozen eyes on Diamond. "If I don't see every single one of you there, then you shall all be cursed to hell fire for eternity! Good day, I hope this warning rang clear. "Constance left the building leaving every religious man and woman fearful. But the others were angry.
Annie glared at the door then turned to see Diamond rubbing her face. Berry looked to Annie then waved her over. Annie nodded and followed Berry to the supply closet.
"What?" Annie asked. Berry sighed.
"Do you know who they are?" Berry said crossing her arms across her chest.
Annie shuddered then nodded. "Yeah, I know them. They're a tough group of people. They were once whistle blowers a long time ago but now they made their own church and holy script, comparing their script to the Horse Gods teachings." Annie shuddered. "They are scary, scary people. When you tell them you've sinned, by their laws you are forgiven, but they will shun you for the rest of your life. I even heard that when they shun someone they make it difficult for that one person to have a job, make their children miserable, and even some say sic the police on them."
Berry gulped. "Does Celestia or Luna know about this?"
Annie shrugged. "I don't know. I don't think she really cared about how ponies pray to the horse gods as on as there ain't no sacrifices to it."
Berry sighed again shaking her head. "Damn, why here?"
"They heard just like everyone else." The two women turned to see Melody with a cane leaning against the bar counter.
"What are you doing up?" Berry asked with a small smile.
Melody shrugged. "I was cramping in bed. Also, I heard all the racket and came up. I tried to find Rose but she's gone."
Berry groaned. "I'll go find her." Berry left Annie with Melody as she ran to the stage. Annie turned to Melody and smiled.
"Happy to see you up and about, what's the cane for?"
Melody smirked. "It's hard to walk, I hurt my ankle too you know."
Annie nodded. "Yeah I forgot." After a moment of thinking Annie looked to her sister again. "So that's why they came?"
"They must have heard about Frontier City and it's their big ticket to make others feel horrible for themselves." Melody spat to the side. "You see why I never went with you to church. They just judge you and such. I like the idea of Titania looking at me as a daughter, not an insect to squash."
Annie nodded smiling. "Yeah they scared the hell out of me too when I go."
Melody snorted. "By that crowd, I bet they're here to stay."
"That's just perfect." Annie groaned. "You know, I better go and check on Tinker. She'll be a target for them no doubt." Annie left without an answer form Melody heading outside to check on Tinker. Melody sighed reaching over the counter to grab a small glass then a bottle of whiskey to drink.
Annie jogged down the street then headed for the large barn. She opened the door then dodged a thrown plate hitting the door and shattered, Tinker's security system.
"Tink!" Annie called out ducking under hanged contraptions and ropes.
"Hiya Annie!" Tinker's voice called from somewhere in the mess. Annie sighed. At least she sounded happy.
"How are you?"
"Great, say I heard some screaming outside, what's going on?" Annie opened her mouth to answer when she heard a big boom somewhere above her. She waited a few seconds then heard Tinker's coughs. "Yeah, that didn't work."
Annie smirked and started chuckling. "What are you working on?"
"Just something, trying to find ways of making a ball easier to load in a barrel,"
Annie shrugged. "Whatever floats your boat, Tink." She called as she turned the corner to the stable block to see Twilight and Remington. Twilight whinnied seeing Annie again.
"Hey big girl." Annie said, stroking Twilight's long face. "Getting bigger huh? Pretty soon, you'll be back to riding." Twilight nodded her head. She leaned forward lipping Annie's sleeve.
"Or right, here's your favorite treat." Annie reached into her pocket and pulled out a few sugar cubes. Suddenly Remington snorted. Annie turned to see his glare. "Oh alright, you too." Annie reached for three more cubes and held out her hand for Remington to eat the cubes up, licking her hand clean.
Annie chuckled as she found a brush then went inside Twilight's stall and started brushing her. Annie enjoyed those times brushing Twilight, soon she started to forget those church people. After brushing Twilight, she decided to sit down in the hay, watching Tinker doing her tinkering. Tinker stopped her work then turned to see Annie laying in the hay.
"Annie?" Tinker called. "Are you alright?" She asked concerned. Annie looked up at her then nodded.
"Yeah I'm fine."
Tinker looked worried as she turned back to her stuff then she turned back to Annie. She pocketed her hammer, walked to the ladder then slid down to the ground. She walked over to Annie then laid down next to her.
"What are you thinking about?" Tinker asked looking at Annie. Annie shrugged crossing her arms behind her head letting her hat fall over her eyes.
"Just a lot of stuff."
"Do you want to talk about it?" Tinker asked curious. "Talking about it with friends will make you feel better."
Annie blinked, she grabbed her hat and set it beside her in the hay so she could look at Tinker fully.
"Friends?"
"Well yeah, we're friends!" Tinker said smiling.
Annie blinked bewildered then smiled. "Yeah I guess we are friends."
Tinker smiled then rolled to her side with her head perched on her hand. "So what's wrong?"
Annie frowned then sighed. "I don't think you can help me with my problems."
"Is it Diamond?"
"Huh?" Annie yelped looking at Tinker with fear. Tinker snickered with a snort.
"It's no secret Annie. Everyone knows about Diamond and you."
"What things?" Annie asked panicking.
"You know, how you make her happy, make her smile, make her feel like a wonderful person."
Annie blinked looked at her. "What do you mean by that?" She asked softly.
Tinker looked at her. "Well Diamond lately has been going through a lot of stuff. Like being old and all."
Annie thought for a moment. "You mean getting older?"
"Well yeah, and she hadn't been with a special someone in soooo long. I mean everyone knows about her first husband, I mean really what a jerkwad!"
Annie smiled then nodded.
"And then she was abandoned in a brothel and a horrible one that made her do horrible, horrible things, then she was sent here, and then she tried to love someone again, but that meanie hurt her very bad."
"A second person?" Annie asked curious. Tinker looked at her surprised.
"You mean you didn't know?"
Annie shook her head. "No, I mean I knew about her first husband but she was with another man?"
Tinker winced. "Um ... a lady."
Annie blushed. "Oh ... What happened?"
Tinker looked sad for a moment then sighed. "Well the story went that before she came here, she lived down south and well she met this pretty lady. They were in love and Diamond was told that she'll be taken away from the brothel and live in a pretty place again. But that backfired."
"How bad?"
"Real bad. She was beaten by the lady's husband and his brothers. Very bad."
Annie went still leaning against the wall in shock.
"From what I heard, they wore black clothes like those people outside."
Annie froze then turned to Tinker again. "What happened to the girl Diamond was with?"
Tinker shrugged. "No one knows. Some say she was killed by her husband, others say she was taken to a mental place where she killed herself in suicide. And Diamond had been cold ever since."
"Cold, she seemed nice."
"Oh yeah, I just meant her heart froze up. That's what I meant."
Annie looked at her hat rubbing her thumbs into the fabric, thinking. Thinking about all the things she had heard and seen in her life and then comparing it to what Diamond went through. It was surprising to see the slim comparisons in their lives, but for some reason Diamond had opened up to Annie and only her. Annie swallowed remembering the feeling of Diamond's lips on hers and how she longed for that feeling again. The real feeling of love.
"You like her don't you?" Tinker asked.
"What?" Annie yelped her cheeks immediately flushed in red. Tinker laughed.
"You do so like her!" Annie was ready to say "no" but stopped thinking. Tinker frowned seeing Annie's sad eyes.
"I don't know if I should continue saying no or I should finally admit it." Annie said sadly, hiking her legs up, and wrapping her arms around them. "Tinker, I'm scared."
Tinker gasped loudly. "You! Scared?! What type of a thing is that?!" Tinker exclaimed shocked. "Annie Apple is afraid? Of what?"
Annie sniffed. "Them." She lamely answered pointing to the doors. "Those people walking around, telling me I'll rot in hell for loving Diamond." She sighed rubbing her face. "I just don't know what to do."
Tinker blinked once then started thinking. "Why not go tell her how you feel?"
"Huh?"
"Like you know. When I feel scared, I talk to Kickie and he will tell me that he'll make sure nothing hurts me again. I'm sure if you told Diamond how you feel ... and that you're scared then maybe she'll promise the same thing."
Annie thought about what the girl just told her and slowly she smiled. "Thank you, Tinker. I guess I needed a younger perspective on things."
Tinker smiled. "Glad to help. You're a friend Annie, and friends must help each other no matter what."
Annie nodded. "You're right. I should really start opening myself up more."
"Yeah you should." Tinker said smiling. Annie grabbed her hat and sighed.
"Well I guess I should ... wait."
"What?"
Annie blushed looking down at the clothes on her body remembering that Diamond made the clothes for her. "Tinker, what's a good gift to give to Diamond?"
Tinker went blank for a moment then started thinking. "I don't really know. Maybe Velvet might know. She and Diamond talk all the time. Or you could ask Berry or that one girl ..."
"Rose?"
"Oh yeah, wait you mean the meany's girl toy?"
Annie stopped then turned to Tinker confused. "What?"
Tinker blinked then went pale realizing what she just said. "Um nothing." She immediately ran up the ladder.
"Wait Tink, what do you mean by that?" Annie called out. Instead of an answer she heard the banging of a hammer on wood blocking out Annie's words. Annie blinked staring up the ladder. After a long moment she backed away then headed out the barn ending Tinker's hammering.
What did Tinker mean that Rose was the "meany's" girl toy? Annie thought. She turned to the barn wondering what Tinker knew. If there was someone here in the town that slept with Rose, she hadn't seen him or her for that matter. But by the sound of that "Meany's girl toy" that must mean something horrible. And Rose seemed like a strong woman, but hearing that made Annie second guess that.
Annie continued down the street thinking about what she was told. Her feet lead her straight to Velvet's shop. She stopped looking at the cursed building rethinking her motion. She sighed then headed up the steps. Tinker mentioned that Velvet might know of a perfect gift to give to Diamond. She opened the door and stopped to see Velvet actually stocking shelves and humming. She was humming! Velvet turned hearing the bell and smiled.
"Hello Annie, how are you?"
Annie blinked, Velvet sounded super happy, even her eyes were dancing with giddiness.
"Uh, hello Velvet, um do you have a moment?"
Velvet blinked and frowned with concern. "Sure, what's wrong?" She asked with worry.
Annie looked around like Velvet would do before talking. "Uh where's Amos?"
"Oh Amos?" Velvet asked with a small smile. "He had to go out and collect some furs to trade. He's usually gone for a long while. He left last week." Annie sighed in relief, no wonder why Velvet was happy. Amos was gone for a time giving Velvet a breath of fresh air. Annie smiled.
"So what were you wanting to talk to me about?" Velvet asked setting her book on the counter then turned her full attention to her. "Is it about Twilight?" She asked with worry.
"Oh no, no, she's doing fine. Pretty soon, I might start riding her."
Velvet sighed in relief. "Oh that's good. I never really got to tell you this, but thank you for everything you have done for her. Since I married Amos, I knew I wouldn't have been able to care for her like I usually do. She seemed to be back to her happy go lucky self. Thank you."
Annie blushed rubbing her neck. "Gosh Velvet, it was my pleasure." Annie cleared her throat now blushing with worry.
"Um Velvet, that thing I was gonna ask ... It's something very important."
Velvet blinked seeing how bashful Annie was. This was odd for the young woman.
"What is it?"
"Um, you see ..." Annie quickly told Velvet about Diamond and her feelings for her and even how she gave her the new clothes. Velvet smiled hearing the story. "So I was wondering, what's the best gift I can give to Diamond?" Annie asked.
Velvet chuckled. "I guess over the past month you two have been getting closer, hmm?"
Annie gulped. "After what Tinker told me, I guess I better start being open with people. And Diamond, she's special. I'm just now realizing this. She helped me, she was nice to me, and very generous." Anne said tugging on her long sleeve shirt. "I mean she made this for me and I just don't know how to top that."
Velvet thought for a moment. "Well I knew Diamond for a while now and she does have a knack for sewing, she learned that from her older sister. With Diamond, I don't know what would be a good gift for her." Velvet said thinking for a long moment. Then she had a thought.
"Well, there is one idea."
"What?" Annie asked.
"Um," Velvet thought a little longer with worry. "The sad thing is, Diamond won't accept any gift anyone would give her. If you had known her when she was younger she might like it, but from my times with her, she just wants to be with people."
Annie blinked at that seeing the sadness in Velvet's eyes. "She's always alone, Annie. She's a different person when around other people than her girls, Berry, or even Rose. I think she's just very lonely and wants to get away. But she has this duty to the Sweetie Belle."
Annie nodded understanding what Velvet meant. It was just like what Diamond told her. She was showing Generosity to the lost souls that come to live here, especially to the working girls. She built the Sweetie Belle then took the girls out of the other brothels to give them a roof, clean clothes, and clean beds. That goes to show what type of a life Diamond had been in to help others.
"I see," Annie said thinking again. "So you said to just be around her? I'm almost around her all the time ...." Until recently, she thought horribly to herself. She had been running away from Diamond when she thought about her. Annie groaned applying hand to face with a groan.
Velvet sighed looking around. "Well, I gave you an idea Annie, go on and do what you will."
Annie nodded smiling a touch at Velvet. "Thanks for the advise. I have a lot to think about."
Velvet smiled. "Glad to have helped. Please come by every now and again. I like seeing friends come to the shop." Annie nodded, tipping her hat.
"I'll remember that. Thanks again."
Velvet waved as Annie left the shop. As soon as she left, Annie had to step away as a group of the church of the gods walked past her to the shop. Annie kept her distance as she stuck her hands into her pockets and walked to back to the Sweetie Belle. Planning on what to do for Diamond.