//------------------------------//
// A Slight Change of Scenery 
// Story: Strip Slip 
// by Indeliblink 
//------------------------------//

"You're fired."

Rainbow Dash leaned back in her chair, carefully scrutinizing the stern face before her. "When you say fired--"

"You don't work here anymore, Dash."

"Oh."

"Your final paycheck will be mailed to you shortly."

If Derpy doesn't lose it, shred it, or burn it before she reaches my house, that is, Rainbow added, silently observing the stallion arranging papers on his desk. She glanced out the window of the Ponyville weather office, making note of the cloudy skies hanging over the town, still waiting to be cleared. "So, can I ask just what I'm being fired for?"

The shuffling of papers ceased, and her boss--or rather, ex-boss--raised his eyes to hers with an unspoken 'seriously?' Rainbow rolled her hoof to urge him on. "Are you joking? You're the laziest ball of feathers ever to pass through here!"

"But I always get my job done before the end of the day!"

"I don't care," he dismissed her, shaking his head. "Your laziness is contagious, and it's preventing other ponies from doing their jobs--ponies who aren't able to catch up like the amazing, lightning-fast Rainbow Dash."

"And that's my problem?"

"No, it's my problem. It's your fault." He shook his head at her incredulous expression. "Sorry, I gotta do what I gotta do to keep this place efficient."

"Gimme another chance!" She yelled, growing frantic. If she didn't have a job, she'd lose her house, she wouldn't have any food, her friends would ostracize her, and she'd end up living in an alley with twelve stray cats and a shredded Wonderbolts' plushie, eating the few leftovers from Sugarcube Corner that weren't devoured by her pink former friend. That was not the life of the most awesome pony in Equestria! "I'll stop being lazy, I promise!"

The stallion's deadpan glare didn't help to reassure her. "Yeah, right. You sure have me convinced."

"I swear!" She jumped onto the desk, pressing her hooves to his shoulders. "C'mon, please! I'll... I'll only take two hours for lunch! And I'll cut my naps to one per day!"

"Get out."





"Just like that?" Pinkie Pie was bouncing in a seemingly random path around the kitchen at Sugarcube Corner, fetching various ingredients from the cabinets, but Rainbow knew she was still focused on the conversation. "No warning, no reprimand, no nothing?"

"Nothing!" Rainbow threw her hooves up in exasperation. "Well, I mean, sure, they've told me plenty of times to get off my rump and back to work, but I didn't think I'd get fired for it!"

"Gee, I'm sorry, Dashie," Pinkie said quietly, patting her on the back.

"So, do you have anything I could do around here? I really need a job." The pegasus awkwardly rubbed the inside of her foreleg, looking up with pleading eyes. Every place she had already visited claimed they were 'not hiring at the moment,' though a few places were considerate enough to give her the truth: Nopony wanted a lazy employee, no matter how popular or cool or breathtakingly amazing she was. Apparently, Rainbow Dash was more popular than she first thought, namely for her bad work ethic. As far as she knew, Sugarcube Corner was the only viable option she had left. Surely Pinkie wouldn't turn her down?

"Hmm..." Pinkie frowned into her hoof, her eyes darting around the kitchen. "Well," she began, causing Dash's ears to stand at attention, "hold on a sec." She turned and stuck her head into the main room of the bakery. "MISTER AND MISSUS CAKE, IS IT OKAY IF RAINBOW DASH WORKS HERE?"

"Sure, dear!" The ringing in Rainbow's ears nearly drowned out Mrs. Cake's slightly quieter reply. "Just make sure you brief her on the safety procedures and let her know where everything is!"

Rainbow dashed forward and clung to her friend's side, nearly tackling her to the floor. "Thanks so much, Pinkie!"

"Yay, hugs!"

"So, whaddya want me to do first?" Rainbow looked around the kitchen eagerly, spotting some weird-looking devices. She restrained her urge to press all the buttons in sight and paid attention to her new coworker, who put on a large grin.

"Let's make cupcakes!" Pinkie trembled with excitement and gathered a mass of cooking utensils in a pink blur. "Okay, first of all, I'll tell you what everything is." She held up a wooden spoon, pointing to it with her other hoof. "Know what this is?"

Rainbow stared at her dully. "A spoon."

"Not just any spoon!" Pinkie thrust her hoof into the air. "It's a wooden spoon!"

"Oh," Rainbow muttered. "Forgive me."

"Don't worry about it!" She put down the spoon and pointed to the other objects in turn. "This is a bowl, a whisk, a blender, a rubber duck, a grater, a sifter, a measuring cup, and a skillet. Memorize them!" She yelled suddenly, startling Rainbow out of her bored daze.

"R-right," she stuttered.

"Okay," Pinkie chirped. "And now, cupcakes!" She bolted to the fridge and pulled out a small vanilla-frosted cupcake, bringing it back over to show to the pegasus. "Open wide!"

"Pinkie, I'm not really hungry ri--mmf!" Rainbow nearly gagged as the pink hoof jammed the cupcake deep into her mouth, cringing as she resigned to swallowing it whole. At least it had actually tasted good. "Alright, now what?"

"Now..." Pinkie booped her on the nose with a hoof. "You take a nap."

Rainbow looked at her oddly. "But I'm not tired."

"Oh, okay." Pinkie shrugged. "Just a suggestion. Now let's get started!"

Besides, naps were what got me fired in the first place... Rainbow thought with a sigh. Pushing those thoughts to the back of her mind, she readied her hooves for action and waited for instructions.

Approximately ten minutes later, she skulked out the back door of the bakery, a small trail of smoke wafting out into the open air. I didn't know flour was flammable... A few gentle wingbeats carried her into the air and towards the outskirts of town.

So, after a long day of job searching (and a very short employ baking not-quite-cupcakes), she had still ended up with squat. Fortunately, Pinkie hadn't asked her to pay for the kitchen to be cleaned, as Rainbow's financial assets were stretched thin already. She was half-expecting to arrive home to find her cloud house foreclosed. Come to think of it, had she made the payments on her house last month?

A quiet moan caught in her throat and her entire body sagged. I need a drink. She let out a harsh laugh at the thought. If I can even afford one.

Rainbow considered the idea for a moment. After the events of the last ten or so hours, she definitely deserved one. Or two. She veered off-course and headed for the train station.

A short trip found her meandering the streets of Manehattan, where she soon arrived in front of a building brightly lit in the wake of the setting sun. "Bite's Bar," Rainbow murmured. I'm guessing they aren't talking about biting pretzels.

Pushing the door open, she strolled towards the bar and rapped her hoof on the counter. "Yo! Three hard ciders!"

The bartender glanced at her and raised an eyebrow. "Got some friends?"

"Nope." Rainbow plopped down on a stool and slouched onto the bar top. She slowly turned her head while her gaze drifted over the other patrons (at least half of which were obviously drunk) and eventually locked onto a vertical metal pole mounted on a stage in the far corner of the room. Yup, she could tell that this was definitely one of the more popular bars in the city.

"Gentlecolts, give it up for: Violet Silk!"

Rainbow's eyes widened as a tall, light purple mare with a sleek burgundy mane strutted out to the front of the stage, winking subtly at a few stallions nearest her. Rainbow had to admit, she was pretty hot. Not that she noticed, or anything.

*ahem*

A cough came from beside her and Rainbow's head snapped forward. "I wasn't staring!" She met the amused eyes of the bartender, who motioned with his head to the three glass mugs of cider on the counter. "Erm, right, thanks."

"No problem," he laughed. "And staring's no crime." A wave of the hoof cut off the mare's wave of furious sputtering. "No worries, hun, there are almost as many fillyfoolers as there are stallions in this place. Don't get your panties in a bunch." He leaned against the bar on an elbow, watching her from the corner of his eye. "Save that for performances."

"I'm--!" She cut off as the stallion's words echoed in her ears, let her eyes trail back to the main event, tried to appear nonchalant. "Would you happen to be implying that you're in need of employees?"

Mirroring her attitude, the bartender inspected his hoof with half-lidded eyes. "I might be. Would you happen to be interested?"

"I might be." Rainbow stood and placed both hooves on the bar. "How's the pay?"

"With tips? One of the best in all Manehattan." A devious smirk appeared on his face, drawing Rainbow in further. "That is, if one is cut out for the job."

"I'm cut out for anything."

"Oh you are, are you?" Rainbow felt the stallion's critical eyes scanning her all over; after a moment he let out an approving hum with a slight nod. "Got any experience?"

"I've worn my fair share of lingerie." The bartender cracked a small grin, which Rainbow soon matched with one of her own.

"You're hired."