Luna had been searching for hours, but still there was no hint to how she could save him from his frozenness
However, her mental uneasiness grew as a unsettling music track began playing from the base of the statue.
Feeling fearful of the mighty form of the Saint, standing there frozen in place, Luna felt a compulsion to say something.
Her mind blanked, she couldn't think of anything to say.
With no words in her mind, she simply turned to a stack of small scrolls and began reading them to calm down.
-Divine Order-
By order of the Pope, leader of The Omnitheistic Church of Universal Acceptance, the Paladin of Wrath to Luna Nightstone, Luke Lustrous, is hereby Sainted as a consecration of himself on the grounds of his noblest of acts.
Saint Luke Lustrous is also pre-approved to become a Papalia de Clerico when the time comes for him to advance as such.
This order is divine in nature and therefore cannot be revoked, repealed, cancelled, vetoed, or any other attempts at nullification by any mortal being.
-Signed, with respect for the dead.
Pope Antonio Miguel IV, of year 312 of EI-24.
---
-Military Order-
We are pleased to inform you that Sir Luke Lustrous, Honor Guard (Knight) of Level 14, is hereby awarded the most prestigious of military honors in the world.
The Medal of Honor.
As with many, this is being awarded posthumously, but fear not, for that fact does not mitigate the glorious achievement of receiving the highest of recognitions from the military system.
We hope that you feel thusly satisfied with this, the actual physical medal itself will arrive the same day as this letter.
-Signed, with respect for the dead.
General Jonathan Marking of the Fantasia Knight Forces.
---
-From the desk of one of the Steam Legionnaires-
We recently heard of our good friend, Luke Lustrous' death, everyone has many tears to shed over this travesty.
We knew him as a noble man, he helped us infiltrate the Necromancer's Guild once, stopped their blasphemous acts against natural life.
We have dubbed him an honorary member of the Steam Legion.
May the bronze never wear, may the brass prevent tear, may the tin conduct well, may the iron send them back to hell.
-Signed, with utmost regards
Lord Vladimir Boxwell, leader of the Steam Legion
---
-We ain't quit sur haow to writ-
BARBARIANS, HO!
Fncy Nite guy Lak Lusty is gud man, we no, we seen im, his sord kewl.
We herd he ded, we cry lots, brav sole hard 2 com buy, we likd him.
Tak dis axe, we mad it 4 im, ar smrtest guy namd it.
Bag uv Olding hav it.
= Sined by Masta Blud Mongril Urist Meadbeard.
Hello again Luke, it's David, y'know, the college goliath?
They inducted me into their order, and I can't really do much here, I have a masters degree in aeronautical science, I was going to be a helicopter pilot, not this.
I only ever was a Barbarian to facilitate my gathering of funds to go to college, and I'm glad that I left before I died too much, can't deal with that much at such a young age.
I forged a battle-axe for you, the others insisted that I made the axe while they write the letter, even though I'M the one who can write well
-Signed, with little room left on the paper
Former Barbarian, Future Pilot, David the goliath.
---
Luna smiled, it was nice to see that such a wonderful man had received the respect he was due.
"And still, after ten millennia, you stand there and await duty to call you again. Diligence like that deserves reward," she said gently, coming closer to him.
She puckered her lips to kiss him, and came in closer.
Closer...
Closer........
Cloooooseeeeerrrr.................
Clooooooooossssseeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrr..........................................
*pad* her lips only touched hard, cold metal, sticking to the surface of Luke's helmet as it appeared back on his head.
Gingerly removing her face and then the helmet off of him, the lunar diarch tried again.
Pucker lips, get closer.
Closer closer closer.
"Decay by time, obscuring the truth, let the old and rotten, return to youth," she whispered past her puckered lips, closing the distance between them.
Finally she met his flesh, their lips pressed together for several seconds as she kissed her Paladin, signifying her trust in him.
Something started happening, first the lightning-lights went out, leaving the room in complete darkness.
A new song started playing as the floor lit up.
The image of the moon, glowed bright white light, showing that the tarnished metal base was collapsing with each hammer-strike sound.
Finally, the Knight was lowered to the floor, the rubble that was the base disintegrating into nothing.
--
Breathing in life again, Luke looked around with his Dark Sight again, he was in his tomb, and standing in front of him was his goddess, Luna Nightstone.
He didn't speak, as his vocal chords hadn't fully rejuvenated yet.
Looking at his shield, then at his goddess, he held his shield in one hand and the Void Zweihander in the other.
Stepping far back, he did a simple 'swish-swish, spin-spin-spin-sheath'.
"Hehe, you looked a bit like Link in the latest Legend of Celestia game, what was the title again? Legend of Celestia: Princess Twilight," Luna recalled, giggling a bit before looking at the massive man again.
Luke cleared his throat, putting his helmet back on his head.
"Your holiness, I breathe life once again, I feel youth and energy, have you bestowed this upon me?" he inquired in a polite but casual tone.
Deciding to play along for the time being, she cleared her throat, "That is correct, I have brought you back to life, there is much for you to do, great Saint, much to do," Luna answered, gesturing towards the stairs, "Come, let us fly from here, we'll be heading south, the world has changed a lot since your lifetime."
"A fine goal, truly there is a nation to the south that needs help, help that I am completely obliged and willing to provide." the black-speckled-white-haired juggernaut led the way up the stairs, holding his shield out in front of him, "This is standard procedure, so please, Luna, stay behind me," he directed, cautiously stepping up the stairs.
"Noble as always, Luke, noble as always, one of the reasons I am so partial to you." the starry-haired woman chimed, giving a giggle as he led the way all the way to the large outcropping in front of the cave.
*CLANK-CLACK, CLANK-CLACK* went his boots, making extremely loud noises.
"Luke, how can simple boots make that much noise, please remind me," the small-ish woman queried, leading the way through the sky
"I weigh three hundred pounds out of armor, seven hundred pounds in armor, if I didn't make noise it would defy the law of conservation of energy, unless my boots turned red-hot with every step, and such a kinetic-to-heat transformation is impossible under normal circumstance unless the kinetic energy is being put into torque, say that of a car grinding on its rims. So with this impossibility taken into account, my boots' hitting the ground converts kinetic energy into sound." he explained at length, somehow flying perfectly fine with four hundred pounds of armor on.
"I... understand... WELL, I must say, it is wonderful to see you again." Luna was recalling ancient memories of meeting Luke face-to-face when he had died after killing the Lich King, and when he had gone to heaven after his final death.
"My self-observation has told me that my body has been reverted to a point only a few days after the Battle of the Lich King, so I still have all three Death Defies, because you gave me a freebie. Excellent. I can't wait to reach this new country, no doubt being crushed by liars and tyranny. There will always be innocents in the world, and I will always protect them, no matter what," the black-armored hybrid vowed, giving his sword a swing.
"Yes, now remind me, what did I do when you arrived the first time?" Luna queried, she knew she was going to have to set the record straight eventually, but for now the pleasantries hadn't been completely dealt with.
"I was about half a body, therefore I was restored, you restored me using the tissues of angels. So I am now one quarter human, one quarter orc, and one half angel, a fine combination, my eyes see all, and all will know my power, either the easy way," he made a gesture like a camera snapping a photo, "Or the hard way," he cracked his knuckles, "But I would never intentionally harm an innocent, however failures happen eventually, and I might accidentally shock someone, or frost them, but it is never intentional. Everything is just a roll of the dice." he explained, recalling hearing that last sentence in his early youth.
"I remember now, it was a boon to see you face-to-face, but it was such a misfortune that our first exchange started off with you being only half of yourself. I digress though, we are approaching the nation I mentioned, and there are some things I need to clear up," the pale-skinned woman pointed to the Castle Canterlot in the distance.
"I am listening, you have always been honest and straightforward with me before, Luna," the Paladin replied, making an 'open ears' gesture.
Landing on the balcony of her bedchambers, Luna led the huge adventurer inside.
"I must say, this seems a bit sudden, your holiness," the chivalrous man said, looking around the room.
"I... what... oh, no, no I didn't mean anything by this, this is just my room in the castle,"
"I can tell by the Night-themed décor." Luke had one of the highest WIS stats he'd ever seen, he hadn't lived to be so old by being idiotic.
"Yes, but, there have been more changes than you might have thought," the starry-haired princess began casting her magic.
The holy swordsman took a few cautionary steps back, avoiding the emanations of magic.
When the energy burst away, Luna stood before him in pony form again.
"... So let me guess, the world as I knew it ended?" he asked.
"About ten thousand years ago."
"As time passed, the old civilizations crumbled to dust?"
"It seems as such."
"Everyone I knew is dead?"
"Unless that Talthos guy is still alive, yes."
"And now I'm living in a world run by things like ponies, unicorns, pegasi, and alicorns?"
.
"There are many other species as well, diamond dogs, griffons, dragons, bears, and so much more, but many of them, besides ponies, would act hostile towards someone like you."
"Well, I can understand the whole world being against me," he drew his sword and tapped the blade on the floor, "It wouldn't be fair otherwise," he sheathed his sword again, "But I am in a world where all the humanoid things have been replaced with equine-esque things?" the brave Knight queried.
A lot was riding on the answer to this question, the answer, and only the answer to this question would determine his next action.
"Well, yes, yes you are," the blue alicorn answered, and Luke's course of action was sealed.
"Okay then, if you'll excuse me for a moment," the Paladin dismissed himself.
Luke took a step back.
He saluted
"Ohhhhhohhhh." and he fainted.
"A bit dramatic, but I can understand, so many new things to see, so many new places to go, so many new people to meet, and so many new possibilities to check out," Luna said in a cheerful tune.
The Paladin didn't respond, as he was fucking unconscious.