//------------------------------// // The Pony Who is Bi-Winning // Story: The Life and Times of a Winning Pony // by Chengar Qordath //------------------------------// “What a load of horseapples!” Rainbow Dash growled, stomping across the compound’s outer wall to emphasize her point. “You kick a bunch of changeling plot and help out a lotta ponies, and all you get for it is getting chucked out of the army, called dishonorable, and then there’s a giant fine on top of that! That sucks!” She trotted up to my side and gave me a pat on the shoulder. “Don’t worry, Cloud, I’ll sort this out. I mean, I did help save Equestria twice, that’s gotta count for enough to clear up some stuff like this.” I suppose I should’ve known Dash wouldn’t take the news well, or understand my decision. One of the things I’ve noticed about the two of us, Dash tends to take a smaller view of things. I don’t mean that as anything bad about her, it’s just she tends to look at the world in fairly immediate terms. Abstract ideas like ‘duty’ and ‘honor’ didn’t mean much to her compared to her friends, family, and any other ponies she cared about. A pony could argue with Dash until the sun died about how I hadn’t earned an honorable discharge, and all Dash would see is somepony taking a shot at one of her friends. “And another thing,” Rainbow continued. “Lemme into your big secret family vault, so I can kick that stupid set of armor’s ... um ... whatever it is you kick on a suit of armor. Whatever, the point is that it shouldn’t have said you weren’t worthy. ‘Cause, you know, you’re cool.” “Yeah? Thanks.” I stepped over and gave her a teasing nudge with my shoulder. “Of course, you’re still cooler than me.” “You can’t really quantify cool like that,” Rainbow answered breezily. “You do that all the time,” I shot right back. “You’re always counting up how cool things are, and comparing that level of cool to other things.” Not to mention she also looks at awesomeness, extremeness, amazingness, radicalness... There are many factors to Dashian Mathematics. Rainbow snorted and rolled her eyes. “I say a lotta stuff, and all of it’s right. It’s just that some of it’s more right when I say it, and some of it’s kinda, you know, universally more right.” I couldn’t resist that opening. “So now you can quantify rightness as well as coolness?” “Kiss my plot, Kicker.” I’ll give you three guesses what I did next. From the way Rainbow yelped, you’d think I’d used tongue. “Gyah! You freaky weirdo perverted crazy ... argh!” At that point Rainbow’s rage broke completely, and she just started ranting in gibberish. On the bright side, her rump was very nice—small, tight, and muscular. I usually like a bit more bounciness in a plot, but sometimes anything more than a hooffull’s a waste. I really should seduce her someday. Well, if not for her being hooked up with Pinkie Pie. Thankfully, there’s an obvious fix for that. Now I just needed to figure out how to sell them on a threesome... “Hey, how are things with you and Pinkie anyway?” I put a wing over Rainbow’s back, which she accepted despite still grumbling over my latest lovably wacky antic. “They’re good.” Rainbow shot me a playful glare. “Though you’re so gonna get it when she finds out you kissed my butt.” “You kidding? She’d probably think it was hilarious.” There was no mystery why Pinkie Pie wound up with the Element of Laughter; that mare could find the funny side of a blank wall. Give her something genuinely funny, like me teasing Dash, and she was guaranteed to crack up. “Shut up.” As anypony fluent in Dash-ese knows, ‘shut up’ means ‘you’re right, but I don’t want to admit it.’ It’s an interesting language. I snuggled in a bit closer to Dash, thoroughly enjoying how it felt to nestle up against her. “Hey, Dash? Just figured I should let you know I love you. Not in the ‘I wanna drag you into bed and give you all kinds of funny feelings sense.’” I thought that over, and made a correction. “Okay, not just in that sense. But mainly ... you mean a lot to me. You’re one of my best friends. Always have been, always will be.” I tried to think of where I’d been going with that idea, and drew a blank. “I dunno, I think I was gonna say something really deep and profound, but I lost it. I guess I just wanted you to know I love you.” I capped that declaration off with carefully platonic kiss to the cheek. “Sheesh, such a sap.” Despite her best efforts to play it cool, the blush on Rainbow’s cheeks gave her away. Underneath the cool, tough exterior, Dash is a total softie. After a couple seconds, her blush intensified, and she mumbled something under her breath. “What was that?” I had a pretty good idea what she’d said already, but I wasn’t about to let her get away with just mumbling it. “Love you too,” Rainbow grumbled, her cheeks positively flaming. “In a ‘try something pervy on me now and I’ll rip your tail off’ way.” For once, I suppressed my sex drive and just opted for hugging her hard enough to make Dinky envious. To my surprise, Dash gave me a quick little peck on the forehead. Like I said, total softie. We probably would’ve stayed like that for a while, if we hadn’t heard somepony cooing behind us. Rainbow and I turned around, and found Fluttershy wearing a sheepish smile accompanied by a faint blush. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you, but you two just looked so cute together that I couldn’t help...” “You didn’t hear anything, right?” Rainbow asked as she hastily disentangled herself from me. Fluttershy offered her gentlest, most reassuring smile in response. “Don’t worry, Rainbow Dash. It’ll be our secret.” She threw in a conspiratorial wink which, since it was Fluttershy, was utterly adorable. “Good,” Rainbow grunted. “I’ve got a reputation to protect and stuff. Do you have any idea how many ponies would be lost and confused if they learned that for a moment I stopped being awesome and got all sappy and stuff? It’d cause a mass panic in Ponyville.” While I was tempted to try and deflate Rainbow’s ego a bit, I couldn’t completely rule out the possibility that she was right. Once you’ve seen Ponyville descend into wild terror over a bunny stampede, it’s hard to rule anything out. Fluttershy delicately cleared her throat to get our attention. “Before I forget, I wanted to remind you that the train from Ponyville is going to be here in an hour.” Oh. Yeah, that train. The one with Derpy, Dinky, Blossom, and probably a lot of other ponies on it. I knew where I stood with Blossom, but I still wasn’t sure how I should handle things with Derpy. We hadn’t really done anything together since our breakup, but we wanted to try and get along. Plus, right now she could probably use a friend. On the other hoof, maybe I’d just be getting in the way when she really wanted time with her family. After what happened to Cirrus, he was going to need all the help he could get. But was I supposed to be helping, or staying out of the way? Ugh. Relationships are so complicated and messy. Maybe I should just focus on the ones I know how to handle. “Hey, Fluttershy?” Eepy turned to me, a gentle smile on her face. “I owe you and Blossom a big talk about ... well, us. Might be something to do, once Blossom’s in.” Fluttershy considered that for a moment, then nodded. “Alright then.” “Finally gonna get your love life sorted out?” Rainbow let out an annoyed snort. “It’s about damn time.” “Rainbow Dash, that’s not very nice,” Fluttershy chided. “Doesn’t make it any less true,” Rainbow grumbled. If I’m being completely honest with myself, I had to agree with her. I’d let the whole situation spiral too far out of control, and it was past time to get things back to normal. Just trying to stay out of the drama and hope it all blew over without me getting involved was never going to work. After how badly things had blown up with Derpy, I owed it to Blossom and Fluttershy to make sure nothing like that happened again. For the moment, I didn’t particularly want to linger on that subject. Not when there were much more fun things to discuss. “So, Dash, about you and Pinkie finally getting around to banging...” One of Rainbow’s ears flicked, and I detected a vulnerability. “You know, mating. Sex. Boinking. Clam jamming. Amorous congress. Buttering the muffin. Waging war on chastity. Doing the eight-legged frolic. Riding the wild pony hard and putting her away wet. Sticking a flesh rocket in a hot pocket. Giving her the lickaroo. Doing the old in-and-out. Making the beast with two backs. Doing some flanking maneuvers. Taking a plot piledriver. Drinking protein shakes. Special exercises.” A particularly devilish idea occurred. “Having a couple bites of Pinkie’s pie. Making Twilight sparkle. Diving for Rarity’s pearl. Bucking Applejack’s trees.” I paused, and shot a teasing grin over at Eepy. “Making ‘Shy flutter. Or making Eepy squeak.” Fluttershy flushed a bit, then offered an uncertain smile. “Kicking the clouds?” “Nope!” Rainbow slammed her hooves over her ears, vigorously shaking her head all the while. “No! Just no! Cloud doing it, I can live with. But if Fluttershy is getting in on it ... no. No! This isn’t happening! Not listening!” She turned and unleashed a death glare on me. “This is your fault, Kicker. You’re corrupting Fluttershy with your...” She trailed off, one hoof circling in the air as she searched for the right term. “You-ness.” “My me-ness is known to be very corrupting.” I’ll admit that I let Dash have that one partially just because it seemed to annoy her. “It’s all part of the irresistibly charming Cloud Kicker package. Besides, if I didn’t have my me-ness, I wouldn’t be me. And then who would I be? Probably really boring, unless I stole somepony else’s them-ness.” I paused, tapping a hoof against my chin. “And really, taking away a pony’s them-ness right after an invasion by shapeshifting bugs would just make me look like I’m ripping them off.” It felt weird, joking about the changeling invasion so soon after it all happened. Maybe it was still too soon, but sometimes really bad jokes were a way to cope. Dash apparently didn’t share that line of thought, judging by the gentle wing-whap she gave me. “Seriously, I don’t even know why I put up with you sometimes.” “It’s because you secretly lust after me. All the prudery and complaining is just overcompensating to hide your gigantic crush.” To be fair, that was pretty much what the deal was with Blossom. I didn’t think that was the case with Rainbow, but I’ll take any excuse I can get to mess with her. “Me crushing on you?” Rainbow rolled her eyes and snorted. “In your dreams, Cloud!” I nuzzled her, and whispered seductively into her ear. “Every night, Dash.” Just for fun, I threw in a couple little kisses around the edge of her ear. Rainbow’s ear twitched, and a bit of color came into her cheeks. “Cut it out, Cloud. I‘m really not in the mood for you getting all weird on me.” “Fine, fine...” I backed off, even though I was pretty sure that in this case the mare didst protest too much. Rainbow might not be secretly lusting after me, but I’m pretty sure there was at least a tiny part of her that secretly liked getting some Cloud-loving. No point in pushing her too far, though. “So, back to you and Pinkie...” From the way Rainbow started frowning, I had a feeling I needed to say something to keep her from getting a bit grouchy on me. “You need any help with that, I’m here for you. I won’t pry, but you can tell me anything you need to.” “I’d be happy to help too.” I jumped a bit when Fluttershy spoke up—I’d just about forgotten she was there. Eepy had, unsurprisingly, gone silent so she wouldn’t bother me and Dash while we were messing around. Not that either one of us would have minded having her participate, but sometimes Fluttershy just assumes that kind of thing. I understand she’s just trying to be considerate, but it would be nice if she didn’t let it push her to the point of inaction. I have learned one or two hard lessons about how much trouble a pony can get in when they let their fear of hurting another’s feelings drive them into paralysis. Then again, after how badly Rainbow had freaked out from hearing a relatively benign euphemism coming from her, maybe it was for the best that she sat out when I was having some fun tease-flirting with Dash. “Pinkie and I are fine,” Rainbow assured us. “Just, y’know, we’re taking our time on things. Not everypony wants to rush into bed as soon as they start dating. We’ll get to it when we’re ready.” Rainbow let out a faint snort. “I mean, what’s the rush? There’s nothing wrong with not doing all that banging stuff. Hay, Twilight hasn’t done it either.” “You mean she didn’t tell you?” Fluttershy paused, then put a hoof over her mouth. “Oh, if she didn’t tell you I probably shouldn’t have mentioned...” Rainbow’s jaw dropped. “The egghead beat me? No way! That’s ... just ... what?” A second later I found myself on the receiving end of a piercing glare. “Cloud Kicker, what did you do?” It was a struggle, but I resisted the urge to make a snarky comment about how it was pretty obvious that I was being accused of doing Twilight. “Why are you automatically assuming this is somehow my fault?” Granted, whenever a sexy pony loses their virginity, I’m probably a reasonable prime suspect. And there was a non-zero chance that she was right to suspect me, but that’s not really important. What matters is that she was accusing me without any evidence to back up her claim. I had a feeling protesting my innocence wasn’t going to get me anywhere with Dash, though. For some reason, she seems to believe I’m a sex-crazed nymphomaniac. I have no idea where she gets those crazy ideas from. Thankfully, there was an easy out. “Oh, hey, look at the time. We better get to the train station!” I wasted no time suiting action to words, bolting off to get as much of a head start on Rainbow as I could manage. After running and hiding long enough for Rainbow to calm down, I headed for the train station. Thankfully, Dash tended to get bored with vengeance-seeking pretty quickly. Unless she’s seriously worked up, Rainbow tends to calm down as soon as the source of her ire is out of sight. That’s not to say I was completely in the clear; Dash would almost certainly prank me within the next day or so. I guess it’s not so much that she forgets as it is that she defers her vengeance to a later date, and gets more creative about it. Still, that was a problem for Future Cloud. Sparkler met me at the train station. From the way she was constantly pacing and nervously shifting on her hooves while we waited for the train, I was tempted to point her towards the bathroom. I’m not sure why she was so worked up—maybe it was just that she wanted to see Derpy and Dinky so much that having to wait any longer felt like torture. She was spending a lot of time checking the clocks and looking down the tracks for any sign of the train from Ponyville. I put a wing over her back and gently pulled her up against my side. “Relax, Sparkler. With everything that’s been going on lately, it’s no surprise the trains aren’t exactly running on time.” Really, the fact that we had anything like normal rail service going on the day after the changelings hit Canterlot was pretty amazing. They’d even rescheduled Shining Armor and Cadance’s wedding for tomorrow. I guess Princess Celestia had decided to handle the whole invasion thing by giving everypony a swift assurance that the threat had been dealt with and life would carry on as normal. Probably a smart way to calm down any lingering panic over the whole thing. Personally, I still felt like letting Luna show off Chrysalis’ severed head would’ve done a lot to calm ponies’ fears, even if the bug bitch-queen wouldn’t be staying dead for long. I guess I’m a bit vindictive that way. Sparkler pressed against my side, tossing in a quick little nuzzle for good measure. “Thanks, Momma.” I grinned and pulled her in a little closer. “Still calling me that?” Sparkler offered a sassy smirk. “Well, you’re still mothering me. So ... yeah.” I responded with a playful little swat on the rump. “Nopony likes a smartflank, Sparkler.” I paused in thought, then corrected myself. “Actually, that’s wrong. Everypony loves a smartflank. I’ll make you a deal—you keep on being a good little Snarkler, and I’ll keep being your cool Momma. Deal?” I ruffled her mane a bit. “And don’t even think about saying anything about how I’m not cool, ‘cause Rainbow Dash just admitted I was, and everypony knows that if she ever sprouted a horn she would be the Supreme Princess of All Things Cool.” “Cool, and all synonyms and related terms thereof,” Sparkler agreed. She paused, looking around the train station. “Kinda surprised she’s not here. I’d figure she’d wanna say hi to Mom and get some quality Dinky-hugging time.” “She’s probably busy helping everything get set up for the next try at the royal wedding.” That, or she was still hunting for me to extract some righteous vengeance. It seemed a bit silly to me—if she was that worked up about being the last virgin in her circle of friends, she should be looking for Pinkie Pie. She would be more than happy to help fix that issue. “Besides, if Dinky really wants to hug her, she’ll track Rainbow down. No force in Equestria can stop Dinky when she’s in a huggy mood.” Sparkler rolled her eyes. “The only time Dinks isn’t huggy is when she’s being a brat. And even then she mixes the two of ‘em a lot. Don’t let the cute exterior fool you—she knows exactly how adorable she is, and will shamelessly use it to con you into giving her cookies and letting her stay up late.” She let out a chuckle. “Spend enough time around her, and you build up an immunity. Well, that or end up wrapped completely around her hoof, like Rainbow Dash. She might be a great foalsitter, but Mom knows not to expect Dinky to do any homework while Dash is over.” “Figures. Dash always hated doing it herself.” Between the three of us: Eepy, Derpy, and I managed to keep Dash from slacking off too much back in Flight Camp, but there were one or two times when she’d just ended up copying our homework five minutes before we needed to get to class. I drew the line at helping her cheat on tests, though—partly out of that sense of duty my parents had pounded into me, but mostly because I’d been scared of getting caught. In my defense, Dash’s problem with homework was usually more that she didn’t have the patience for all the busywork rather than failing to understand the material. Sparkler let out an over-the-top fake gasp of shock. “I never would have guessed that the mare who used to call anypony who liked books an egghead wasn’t a very good student.” She let out a quick little snerk. “Seriously, the first time I actually took a break from playtime to go do my homework, Dash actually seemed a bit annoyed about it. Said I could always do homework after she left.” Sparkler rolled her eyes, but the smile on her face gave away her true feelings. “She’s still the best foalsitter ever s’far as Dinky’s concerned, just don’t expect her to get top marks in the whole ‘responsible adult who sets a good example for the kids’ thing.” “Sounds like her, yeah.” I glanced down the platform and saw a train slowly chugging towards us. Looks like my strategy of getting Sparkler chatting for a bit in order to distract her had worked out. I guess there’s a reason Shadow’s Armor didn’t take any potshots at my tactical acumen. Of course, spotting the train undid what little calm Sparkler had managed to find, and soon she was frantically dancing on the tips of her hooves again. Clearly she wasn’t the only Doo suffering from a bit of separation anxiety, because as soon as the train doors opened a grey blur shot out and tackle-hugged Sparkler, a smaller lavender blur following behind her. I had a feeling Derpy and Dinky were going to be all but surgically attached to Sparkler for the next couple days—Derpy had probably been scared out of her wits once she realized her daughter was in a war zone. I didn’t want to intrude on their family moment, and there was a watermelon-maned mare trotting off the train too, so I went up to Blossom. Even though Sparkler’s letter had presumably let everypony know that I was alright, she still let out a relieved breath when she saw me. Reading a letter is a poor substitute for seeing that a pony is okay with your own two eyes. Sure enough, I was shortly on the receiving end of a hug that didn’t quite reach Dinky levels of squeezing, but was definitely in that neighborhood. “You alright, Cloud?” “Yeah. Better now.” I leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. It still felt a bit odd to just kiss her like that. Not in a bad way or anything, but I was still kind of adjusting to the idea that we were at a point where I could kiss her without it being a big deal. Two lovers doing a little smooching after they’d been apart for a while was a perfectly normal thing to do. Still, even if it wasn’t something I’d adjusted to yet, it was definitely something I wanted to get used to. It probably didn’t help the awkwardness levels that Derpy gave an odd little twitch when she saw us kissing. I guess that was to be expected though; even if we’d managed to end things on reasonably amicable terms, it would probably be a while before things stopped being a bit weird between us. Transitions are always hard when a relationship ends that suddenly. Blossom caught Derpy’s look too, and offered a single half-apologetic nod. She was probably thinking about the same thing as me: we didn’t want to upset her, but we weren’t gonna hold ourselves back just to spare her feelings. It’s hard to have a romantic relationship when you can’t even kiss your loved ones for fear of upsetting an ex. Blossom turned back to me and got my brain off the subject of Derpy. “What about the rest of your family? You didn’t lose anypony, did you?” “Nopony close. Dad and ‘Lula were pretty shaken up, but nothing too serious—they stayed at the hospital overnight to be safe, but they’re out and okay now.” It might seem a bit heartless to say it, but having a fifth cousin twice removed die didn’t really bother me all that much. I mean, any death is a tragedy, and I care more about another Kicker than I would a random stranger on the streets, but it’s hard to get too upset when you never really knew the pony to begin with. The clan ties were a big deal, but it was more a matter of a shared legacy than a deep, personal connection. Those personal connections are what matters most, at least to me. “The clan’s alright; the worst of it’s what happened with Lyra and Cirrus.” “I heard about Cirrus,” Blossom shot a sympathetic look to the Doos. “Derpy spent half the train ride here holding onto me, and she doesn’t even like me that much. But I guess any port will do in a storm.” She sighed, her ears going flat against her skull. “How is he?” “Still heavily medicated enough that I’m not really sure it’s sunk in.” That was probably a good thing, in a way. Having Derpy there would help a lot more than anything I could’ve done when he finally realized what had happened to him. Hopefully their parents would be back in Equestria before too much longer—being in the import/export business meant they spent a lot of time out of the country. I might not be overly fond of Derpy’s parents on account of how they reacted to her getting pregnant, but they were still Cirrus’ family. Blossom had her mouth half-open to respond, but seemed to be at a loss for words. I guess there’s not really much a pony can say about that kind of situation. She finally settled on pretty much the only thing she really could say. “I hope Cirrus makes it out alright. He seemed like a nice pony when I met him.” “Yeah, he’s alright.” The conversation died after that. Instead of talking, I just held Blossom for a bit. Really, some of the most important things one pony can say to another don’t need to be put into words. Or maybe it’s just that words aren’t always the best way to convey things. Blossom could’ve told me she loved me until she was blue in the face, but that was nothing compared to having her hold me, and just feeling it. When you really think about it, love is one of those words that can mean all kinds of things. I mean, take Rainbow Dash, Blossom, and Dad. I love all three of them, but in each case it means something very different. Friendship, romance, family—love covers all three of those things. Considering the fact that those are pretty much the three most important ways ponies can connect with each other, it seemed really imprecise to use the same word for all three of them. Then throw stuff like having a general love for all of ponykind on top of that, and things just get even messier. Seriously, whoever was responsible for creating the Equestrian language really dropped the ball when it came to love. I mean, love is such an important part of what makes ponies be ... well, equine. Without it, we wouldn’t really be ponies anymore. That’s why the changelings had never stood a chance against us: love was too integral to all of ponykind for them to ever really take it away from us. I guess it’s ironically appropriate that even though they fed on it, the bugs didn’t really understand what love was. That’s why at the end of the day Cadance and Shining Armor blasted the bug’s bitch queen out of Canterlot, and then Luna caught her and finished the job. I gave Blossom another kiss, probably on account of the fact that I was in a fairly romantic mood after getting all philosophical about the nature of love. I made a mental note to give a Blossom a very in-depth lesson on the matter later that night. Actually, screw waiting for tonight—with a little work, I could get Dad and ‘Lula to leave the house for a bit while we took care of business. “Hey, Blossom? Stop by the compound for a bit? I’ve got a few things I would really like to teach you. Mostly about love, and how to make it.” Blossom grinned, then checked one of the clocks. “It took ten minutes after I stepped off the train for you make a try at getting me into bed. I’m impressed—I half-expected you to just drag me straight to the bedroom the instant you got your hooves on me.” “Normally that would’ve been how I handled it, but yesterday was pretty crazy.” “No kidding.” Blossom paused, and her ears perked up. “Hey, speaking of taking me to your clan compound and teaching me a few things, that reminds me...” She paused, and gave me a playful little whap on the chest. “And just to preempt whatever’s going through your head, no, it has nothing to do with sex. I was actually thinking that I’d like to get some training from the rest of your family.” Well that was a surprise. “You want to learn how to fight?” “Yeah.” Blossom paused, shuffling uncertainly on her hooves. “I mean, during the whole thing with your mom, I wound up just being that useless tagalong filly who only wound up getting in the way until you found somepony who could take me off your hooves. And then with everything that happened here ... I couldn’t have done anything to help. If I’d been in Canterlot, I wouldn’t have done anything to help you, I just would’ve been another damsel in distress, hiding in one of your clan’s bunkers and hoping everypony else could take care of me.” Personally, I thought Blossom might be selling herself a little short on that point. Not that I would’ve slapped her into full plate and put her on the front lines, but she wasn’t the type to just sit quietly and wait for all the scary noises to stop. She certainly could’ve done bug-checking, helped out at the field hospital, or any one of a dozen things. I didn’t want to seem like I was interrupting, so I didn’t point any of that out. Yet. “I’m not saying I expect to become some sort of elite flank-kicking super soldier,” Blossom continued on, “but I would like to know a bit about defending myself. And everypony else I care about. At least enough that next time you get mixed up in something dangerous, you don’t feel like you need to send me away so I’ll be safe. I’d rather be there with you, helping out.” “I don’t think I’m too likely to end up in another war zone. I had a word with Princess Celestia, and I’m officially out of the Guard now.” Not on the best of terms, but out was out. “Yeah? I wanna hear about that later.” Blossom gave a little shake of her head, and got back to what she’d been saying. “Anyway, even if you’re not in the military anymore, we live right next to the Everfree Forest, not to mention all the crazy stuff that can happen in Ponyville. It’s still a good idea to make sure I can take care of myself next time something weird happens.” She paused in thought for a bit, then put a hoof over my heart. “Besides, even if you’re a civilian now, your family’s full of soldiers, and you spent years learning to be one. I guess it feels like I need to understand that a bit more if I’m going to be a part of your life from now on.” I couldn’t really fault her logic. “If you really want to learn, I’m sure I can find somepony willing to teach you. I should warn you that the clan’s training isn’t exactly easy.” That was a big part of why I didn’t particularly want to train Blossom myself. As much fun as I could have with stuff like teaching her grappling, I don’t think I’d be able to really push her as hard as I might need to. One of the downsides of being in love with a mare is that you’ll end up wanting to use a softer touch with her. When it comes to combat training, sometimes you need to push hard. Besides, Blossom could probably find all kinds of evil sneaky ways of bribing me into letting her get out of exercise. Delicious, sexy bribes. Possibly a twin foursome or something. Wait, why was I not running her training program again?  After a week of calisthenics, she’d probably be up for just about any kink in the book if it would get her out of another day’s workout. That rather pleasant line of thought came to an abrupt end on account of Blossom swatting me on the chest. “What?” I protested, trying to put on my most innocent, harmless smile. I don’t think it was very convincing, mostly because Blossom knows me too well. “You were leering.” Blossom let out a long-suffering sigh, but couldn’t quite hide the hint of a smile on her face. “Really, Cloud, can you go five minutes without thinking about how to get me into bed?” “I could probably come up with something if I absolutely had to.” I reached over and blatantly grabbed a hooffull of her flowery plot. “But it’s so much more fun this way.” “Is this pervert bothering you, Blossomforth?” I jumped a bit at the sound of Derpy’s voice, mainly because I’d been a bit too focused on the sexy mare in front of me to notice her walking over to us. Thankfully, Dinky was busy trying to break Sparkler’s ribs, so we didn’t need to worry about keeping things filly-friendly. “Don’t let it bother you, it’s how she blows off steam. Like a coping mechanism, I guess.” “Derpy, talking about my coping mechanisms makes you sound too much like my aunt.” As a rule, ‘hot sexy mare’ and ‘reminds me of Aunt Wind’ are two things that shouldn’t go together in the same sentence. Well, not unless I had some serious unresolved issues. I have plenty of kinks, but incest isn’t one of them. “I did take a couple psychology courses back in college.” Derpy offered me a wall-eyed grin. “Sadly, we never got into anything that would let me understand what’s going on in Cloud’s head. Well, aside from the obvious.” “Yeah, my brain’s just a giant echo chamber with the word ‘bang’ constantly bouncing around.” Just to make sure there was no doubt about that, I started fooling around with one of Blossom’s wings. Nothing too serious—we were within Dinky’s line of sight, after all—just running one of my hooves over it. For whatever reason, feeling Blossom up reminded me of one of the main reasons I’d wanted to see her. Well, other than my keen desire to get her into bed and spend a couple hours giving her all kinds of warm squiggly feelings. “Hey, Blossom, sometime later today I was thinking we could get together with Fluttershy, and see about hammering out the whole ... ‘us’ situation.” “Oh.” Blossom’s shoulders slumped a bit, her eyes shifting over to Derpy and a slightly guilty flush on her cheeks. “Right. That. Yeah, I guess we do need to get everything settled.” Derpy nervously licked her lips, her gaze darting between the two of us. She let out a hesitant little noise from the back of her throat before she finally built up the courage to speak. “I’d like to be there too, if that’s okay.” She paused, one hoof awkwardly scuffing along the pavement. “I know we’re not exactly together anymore, but there are a couple things I’d like to talk over with the three of you.” Huh. I guess I should’ve expected that she might have something to say. Needless to say, a big part of me was hoping that whatever she had to say might include her reversing course on her decision to break things off with me. Sure, the breakup was probably the smart thing for both of us right now after everything we’d gone through, but I still loved her. Always would.  “Yeah, I think it would be good to have you there.” “Good.” Things went awkwardly quiet after that, until Derpy made an effort to lighten the mood a bit. “And for the record, Cloud, I am so siccing Rainbow Dash on you if it turns out that this ‘talk’ is just an elaborate attempt to set up a foursome.” Blossom and I both had a chuckle at her snark, then my flower-plotted best friend and lover turned to me with a smirk. “I’m sure between the three of us, we can keep her in line. With as much time as I’ve spent around her, I know exactly what to do with her once she starts acting up.” Then she spanked me. Hard. Needless to say, I enjoyed the hay out of it. “Yeah, encouraging her is definitely the best way to rein her sex drive in,” Sparkler commented as she trotted over to join us, her little hug limpet in tow. Blossom smirked at the teen. “Who said I wanted to make her stop?” She leaned over and gave me a quick nuzzle, while her hoof snuck one last feel of my plot. I don’t think I’ve ever felt prouder of her. Blossom’s eyes shifted to Derpy and the kids. “I’ll catch up with you later, okay Cloud? “Sure thing.” I gave her a quick goodbye kiss, enjoying the show as she trotted off. Dinky quickly demanded my attention by being her usual adorably innocent self. “What was that sex drive thingy Sparky was talking about? Is it like driving a cart? And why was Miss Blossom spankin’ Cloud Kicker? Did she do somethin’ bad? It musta been really bad, ‘cause Mommy doesn’t spank me even when I steal from the cookie jar.” She paused, then hastily corrected herself. “Um, I mean t’say even when Sparky steals from the cookie jar and tries t’make it look like I did it.” “Brat.” Sparkler pulled her little sister into a bear hug and applied a noogie to her head. Older siblings must noogie their younger sisters and brothers; it’s practically the law. While Dinky whined and tried to squirm her way to freedom, Sparkler shifted her attention back to me. “Seriously though, it might be a good idea to tone it down a bit, Momma. Before we have to explain too much to Dinks.” Thankfully, Sparkler’s comment had given Dinky something far more interesting to focus on. The filly let out a shocked gasp, then scampered up to us. “Did Sparky just call you ‘Momma?’ Does that mean she’s got two mommies now? That’s. So. Cool! And it means she gets twice as many mommy hugs and cookies and birthday presents and Hearth’s Warming presents and candy and...” She trailed off, her young brain quickly drawing the only logical conclusion she could, and she promptly latched onto one of my forelegs. “Can you be my other mommy too? Please? I’ll give you hugs every day!” Dinky’s concentrated adorableness was just short of a lethal dose for most ponies, but this time she had overplayed it. Or maybe I’d started developing an immunity to it, on account of spending so much time around her and being a semi-responsible mother-type figure. Though if all it took was time around Dinky and being in the maternal-ish position of godmom, you’d think Rainbow Dash wouldn’t be so thoroughly under her thrall. Though Rainbow was really more like a cool aunt for Dinky: good for coming over and spoiling her a bit, but she never had to enforce bedtime or make sure Dinky did her homework. Maybe that’s what made the difference; I was starting to feel like I had to be responsible when it came to Derpy’s kids instead of just having fun with them. Still, just because the innocent and adorable act didn’t work on me anymore didn’t mean I wanted to crush her hopes entirely.“ Maybe you’ll get a little something extra if your mother tells me that you’ve been good, and you’re treating her extra-nice.” “Aww. Pleeease?” Dinky unleashed the cutest little pout she could manage, but I clenched my metaphorical teeth and resisted the attack. Dinky might have weapons-grade cuteness at her disposal, but the Guard does give their officer candidates willpower training. It’s not just for resisting mind control magic, it’s also good at stopping precociously adorable fillies from wrapping you around their hooves. Derpy ruffled her daughter’s mane and gently chided her, “Don’t be greedy, Muffin.” She gave her younger daughter a fond smile, then shifted to look between Sparkler and me. “So ... ‘Momma.’” “Yeah.” Sparkler hesitantly trotted back over to my side, pointedly lifting up one of my wings and snuggling under it. “Lotta stuff happened, you know? I needed a mom-type pony, and she was there for me. S’not a problem, is it?” Sparkler tried to keep her chin up and seem calm and composed, but she couldn’t quite stop herself from chewing on her lower lip. For all the stubborn pride of teenagerdom, she was still mommy’s little girl underneath it all. Sure, she’d technically been adopted, but only a fool would think that made Derpy’s approval matter any less to her. “No, of course not.” Derpy answered hastily, her gaze resting on myself and the two fillies currently attached to me. After a couple seconds she gave a single nod, half to herself, and smiled. “So then, ‘Momma,’ I hope you’re ready for all the work that comes with the title. Helping them get up in the morning, cooking for them, getting them to school, picking them up from school, homework, chores, enforcing bedtime, the whole deal? You’re up for all of that?” For a moment I wasn’t sure about all that, but one look at Dinky and Sparkler, and I knew what I wanted. “You know what? I think I’d like that.” I paused for a moment, then grinned down at Dinky. “But only if I get lots and lots of mommy hugs in exchange.” Just as I’d expected she would, Dinky let out a loud gasp and started working as hard as she could to cut off the circulation in one of my forelegs. Dinky’s very consistent that way. Sparkler got in on the act too, though obviously her hug was a bit more sedate. My ribs were appropriately grateful for that; Sparkler was far enough into teenagerdom that she was pretty much adult-sized: she was a bit small-ish for a full-grown mare, while I could comfortably look most stallions who weren’t Big Mac sized in the eye. Still, an adult unleashing a Dinky-style hug would be less cute and more crushing. After her daughters spent a while testing whether it was possible to hug a pony to death, Derpy cleared her throat to get our attention. She spent a second or so smiling at us, then her ears slowly drooped as she brought in the bad news. “I hate to be a wet blanket, but we do need to get to the hospital.” Oh. Right, Cirrus. In all the excitement, I’d almost forgotten the other reason Derpy was here. I reluctantly let go of my two pseudo-daughters so they could go back to their real mother. I was a bit tempted to tag along with them and see how Cirrus was doing, but... “I wouldn’t mind checking up on him, but I’d guess you probably want your trip to be a private family visit.” Derpy thought it over, then slowly nodded. “Yeah, I do. Which is why you should come along.” She reached over and took one of my hooves, slowly pulling me over to join the group. “Welcome to the family, Cloud Kicker.” The visit to the hospital was just painful. Cirrus was still far too doped up on painkillers to do much more than return all the hugs he got from Dinky, and manage the odd sentence or two of conversation. Usually some variation on asking whether everypony else was okay. It’s nice that he cared, but since he wasn’t in any condition to carry on a conversation, we mostly spent our time at the hospital just looking at him and feeling miserable. There was a dark cloud hanging over the whole room, and I couldn’t see any way of getting rid of it. About half an hour into our visit, he fell asleep again. I didn’t know how long Derpy was planning to stay, and I certainly didn’t want to come across like I was trying to rush her out, but there were too many other ponies who had a claim on my time for me to spend all day at the hospital. As it was, I’d already stepped out for a few minutes to check in on Lyra again. I took a deep breath, and tried to keep my voice as even and gentle as I could. “Derpy? I hate to interrupt, but I can’t stick around much longer.” Derpy turned to me, blearily wiping eyes filled with unshed tears. “Oh, right. Yeah, that’s okay.” She hesitated for a long moment, then slowly rose from Cirrus’s bedside and staggered to her hooves. “We still need to settle things with Blossomforth and Fluttershy too, don’t we? Just give me a minute, and...” “Hey.” I reached over, putting a gentle restraining hoof on her shoulder. “It can wait, if you want to stay with him for a bit longer. I’ve put this talk off for more than a month now, another day or two won’t make any difference.” “No.” She gently shrugged my hoof off, slowly shaking her head. “It’s—I think if I had to stay here all night, I’d go crazy. I can’t talk to him about it or anything, I’d just be spending the whole night looking at that bandage where his wing—” She cut herself off, taking a deep, shuddering breath. “Thank you for being so considerate, Cloud, but I think I need to get out for a bit, and just find something—anything else to think about.” I put a wing over her back, using a few feathers to gently wipe her eyes. While I comforted her, my gaze shifted over to Sparkler and Dinky. Sparkler looked to be holding up fairly well, probably because this wasn’t her first visit. Dinky, however, was just staring at her uncle with this blank, puzzled frown. She didn’t look sad so much as she just didn’t seem capable of wrapping her head around the scene before her. Some portion of her innocence was slipping away, right in front of my eyes. Maybe it was selfish of me, but I couldn’t bear to see that happen. After taking a few seconds to think up a plan, I waved Sparkler over and passed her a hooffull of bits. “Take Dinky out somewhere nice for a while and put a smile back on her face.” Sparkler tossed a look over her shoulder at her little sister, then took the bits and offered a single nod. “Yeah, no problem. There’s lots of places for kids in Canterlot, and the bugs probably didn’t get to all of them.” She went over to her sister, wrapped a foreleg around her, and began gently pulling her towards the door. “C’mon, Dinks. Wanna go to Game Stable?” Ah, Game Stable. I’d taken Alula there once; the main things I remember about the place were the constant kiddie music, the overpriced pizza, and the large collection of coin games that could rip through an adult’s bitpurse at an impressive rate. It was the sort of place Dinky would love. “Yeah-huh!” Dinky’s frown almost instantly disappeared at the mention of the restaurant. “I wanna play Pin the Tail on the Pony and Manticore Madness and Hoptrot and Hydra Hunter and...” The filly slowly trailed off, her eyes turning to her uncle again. “Hey, I was thinkin’ ... Uncles Cirrus had Favorite before me, so he can have it back for a little bit, 'cause it always makes me feel better when I get sick or owie. Can I bring it next time?” Sparkler winced at the innocent earnestness of that comment, pulling her sister in for a quick half-hug. “Sure thing, Dinky. Now c’mon, I heard they’ve got a new game: Super Battle Clouds 1000. It’s like Battle Clouds, but super and taken up to a thousand.” “Oooooh!” Dinky’s ears perked up, and she grinned eagerly. “I wanna play that one, too!” Once Sparkler was done carting Dinky off for some much-needed stress relief, Derpy and I headed back to the clan compound. My family home probably wasn’t the most neutral location for this get-together, but it did have plenty of room, and presumably Blossom would be staying there with me. I guess we could’ve tried the palace where Fluttershy was staying, but I doubted they could spare the room for us between the post-battle aftermath and preparations for the second try at the royal wedding. Besides, I had a feeling that if we had our big talk too close to Fluttershy’s other friends, they would feel compelled to join in. Sure, they would just want to help, but this was an issue I felt like the four of us needed to settle for ourselves. So that’s how I wound up sitting in my living room with Derpy, Fluttershy, and Blossomforth. We were all clustered around the coffee table, with Blossom and Fluttershy on opposite ends of a couch while Derpy and I sat across from each other in the two big comfy chairs. Fluttershy made tea for us, but right now the mugs were sitting on coasters, slowly cooling. Somepony needed to break the ice, and since this whole situation was my doing, it might as well be me. “So ... um ... I guess we should get started?” Blossom and Derpy offered mute nods, while Eepy took it upon herself to try and get everypony a bit more comfortable, offering us all a reassuring smile. “I think sitting down and talking everything over is a good idea, and I’m glad we’re finally doing it.” It would’ve been a good idea before things had blown up so badly with Derpy. Now ... well, better late than never, I guess. “Great. So...” I ran a hoof through my mane as I tried to come up with something intelligent to say. The four of us were long overdue for a talk, but I wasn’t exactly sure what it was we all needed to say. Maybe that was a good thing to sort out before we went any further. “I was thinking we could start by just having everypony say what it is they wanted out of this deal. Seems like that's the first step to finding some way to sort this out that everypony'll be happy with. Sound good?” Once I got answering nods from the other three mares, I continued. “Great. So, I guess I'll get started, since I'm not very complicated. I love all of you, and I want to show that in any way you'll let me.” Derpy took a deep breath, and then spoke up. “And I love you too. Even after everything that happened, I still care.” She offered a conceding nod to Blossom and Fluttershy. “All of us do. Sparkler and Dinky too. Well, Dinky loves everypony, but...” She trailed off for a moment, then closed her eyes and gathered her thoughts before continuing. “My daughters both need a stable home to grow up in. If that's what they need, then that's what I want, period.” She paused again, then offered me a slight nod. “However, I think we would all like you to be a part of that life, as long as things don’t get too crazy. Romance might be off the table, but I don’t think Sparkler would forgive me if I didn’t find some place for her Momma in the family.” That remark earned Derpy a pair of quizzical looks from Blossom and Eepy, so she quickly explained Sparkler’s new nickname for me. “Congratulations on the promotion, Cloud.” Blossom offered me a grin, “I never would’ve figured you for the maternal type when I met you, but I guess you’ve opened my eyes to a lot of things.” She took a deep breath, then jumped into outlining her position. “My turn now? For the record, I love you too, Cloud Kicker. And, well, I guess the main thing I want is you.” She blushed a tiny bit at the confession; it was nice to see that even if she’d loosened up a lot, there was still a tiny bit of prudery left in her. “I don't really know how to sort this whole situation out, or how I should balance everypony's needs. I'm willing to make some adjustments if I need to, but I never really thought too much about all of that when I first got into this mess. All I know is that I want to be with you.” I could certainly sympathize with Blossom on that point. I had never planned on getting into a big complicated tangle of a love life. Quite a few of the entries on my list of banging rules were about avoiding those kinds of issues. All I’d really wanted was to have some fun sexytimes with a bunch of cute ponies. Some of whom also happened to be good friends of mine. I’d never expected things to get this messy. Unsurprisingly, Fluttershy had remained deferentially silent while Blossom and Derpy said their pieces. Now that they were done, she finally spoke up. “What I think is most important is that we try and make everypony happy. I know everypony has been through a lot recently, but I would like to think that even if we disagree, there’s a way for everypony to be able to get along.” She hesitated for a moment, and I gave her an encouraging little nod. “But ... I do like being with Cloud Kicker, and when I say I want everypony to be happy, that includes me.” I looked over the mares and offered my best charming, diplomatic smile. “Okay then. That all sounds pretty reasonable. Derpy wants a stable home for her daughters, Blossom wants me and is willing to adjust to make it happen, and Fluttershy wants me, as long as it doesn’t hurt anypony else in the process. I think we can all agree that there's some way to work this out so everypony gets what they want.” I took a deep breath, and waved a hoof across the room. “So let's get to it.” Derpy cast a loaded look between myself and Fluttershy. “You two have been my best friends for the better part of the last decade, and even past that. We’ve had our ups and downs, but at the end of the day I always know I can trust you, and count on you.” She turned to Blossom, shifting in her seat and tracing a hoof through nonsense patterns in the air as she struggled to find the nicest way to put things. “You don't quite have our history.” Blossom’s ears drooped a bit at that. “Yeah, I know I'm the newcomer in the group. I've only known Cloud for ... what, a bit less than two years?” She looked to me for confirmation, and after thinking back I nodded. We’d met a couple weeks before the whole Nightmare Moon thing, and that had been about two months short of two years ago. “Anyway,” Blossom continued, “just because I haven’t known her as long as you two have doesn't mean that she means less to me.” “Of course not,” Fluttershy instantly reassured her. “I’m sure Derpy didn’t mean to imply anything of the sort. Many of us have been friends for a while now, and that shared history does play an important part in our relationship with her. But Twilight’s a really important friend to me too, even though I’ve known her for less time than Cloud Kicker and Blossomforth have known each other. And, well, we know how powerful that friendship is. So, I hope we can all agree that we have strong feelings for Cloud, and how long we've had those feelings isn't as big a deal as the fact that we have those feelings.” Derpy offered Blossom an apologetic smile. “Of course your feelings count just as much, sorry if it came out like I was saying otherwise. I didn’t mean to say that how long we’ve known Cloud makes us count for more, it’s more that Fluttershy and I at least have our old friendship to fall back on. But you and me, or you and Fluttershy...” She trailed off, her hoof waving between the three of them. “We don’t really have much in common with you, Blossomforth. There’s no connection, unless you count the fact that we all care about Cloud. And that makes it a lot harder to avoid conflict.” “Well, maybe it's time we changed that,” I suggested. “It does seem like you three have been trying to get to know each other a bit, so why not just keep working at it?” Blossom rolled her eyes and gently whapped me in the chest. “Work on our connections? You're just hoping to get a foursome out of this.” “Blossom! I am shocked and appalled that you would even make such a suggestion!” Such a wonderful, sexy suggestion. I turned to the others, my face a picture of wounded innocence. “Derpy, Eepy, would I do something like that?” “Yes,” Blossom instantly responded. “In a heartbeat,” Derpy agreed. “Um ... maybe?”Ah, Fluttershy, always the diplomat. I tried to keep up the facade, but it was clear none of them were falling for it. That’s the problem with being in love with ponies; they start figuring you out. “Yeah, I would love a foursome. You have to admit, it would solve all the romantic complications.” That earned me flat, unimpressed looks from Blossom and Derpy, while Fluttershy started blushing. Blossom then hastily changed the subject. “Anyway, I do think Derpy brings up a good point. I've only really talked to the two of you a couple of times.” She paused, offering a slight nod to Derpy. “I know we butted heads a few times, but whenever we weren’t fighting I got the impression that you were a pretty decent pony. Same thing with Fluttershy, minus the fighting. I wouldn't mind getting to know either of you a bit better; I think we could be friends.” “I would like to be your friend too, Blossomforth” Fluttershy offered a gentle smile, and scooted a bit closer to her on the couch. Her smile didn’t last anywhere near long enough, though. “Although ... I don't want to make this more complex than it already is, but there are also other ponies in Cloud's life.” “We're not bringing them in here too, are we?” Derpy deadpanned. “I don't think there'll be enough room, not to mention Cloud’s secret evil plans would have to upgrade from foursome to an all-out orgy.” She took a moment to get her mind back into serious mode. “I’d say the other ponies in her life are part of the overall big picture, but right now it's just about the four of us.” That got a nod from Blossom. “The three of us need get ourselves sorted out before we move on to what role Cloud's...” She paused, struggling to come up with a proper term for my bang buddies. “How we all feel about her friends-with-benefits.” “I don’t want to neglect them completely,” I agreed. Friends-with-benefits were the best kinds of friends, after all. “You three are the most special ponies in my life, but you aren’t the only ones I care about. There’s also ponies like Lyra and Bon Bon, and a bunch of other who aren’t on the same level, but they're still a part of my life, and I still love them. I don’t want an arrangement where I have to cut them out of things.” Considering I’d just given them a rather difficult condition to swallow, I decided to follow it up by offering a concession. “On the other hoof, I have been thinking about toning things down a bit. It’s just that ... sharing that stuff counts for a lot more when it’s with a pony I love. I mean, it’s always fun with a decent pony, but I don’t really need to hit the clubs looking for somepony when I’ve got somepony to come home to, you know?” “I think I know how you feel, Cloud.” Derpy offered me a smile full of maternal-ish wisdom. “I guess I had to settle down earlier than most ponies, on account of Dinky. But yeah, it is nice to have a bit more stability in your life once you get out of the young and stupid phase where you think you’re going to live forever.” Blossom grinned and nudged me with one of her wings. “Are you saying Cloud’s getting older and more mature? I guess that’s something. Just as long as she doesn’t give up on the wild and crazy completely. It is part of her irresistible charm.” “So, Cloud needs to find a balance where she’s still herself, but a bit more restrained and reliable?” Fluttershy concluded. “I’m sure she can manage that. After all, if she changed too much she wouldn’t be the mare we all fell in love with. But I think she can still be herself while also being somepony we can all rely on to be there for us. Because I already believe in her.” “Thanks, Eepy.” I leaned over and gave her a quick nuzzle. “So I’ll still be my lovably crazy self, just within a slightly smaller circle. I can work with that.” Now that the question of my general fondness for banging had been addressed, Derpy turned to Blossom and got the conversation back on track. “Look, I know I wasn't always at my best around you; otherwise I would have seen that you were a pretty good pony too. I think the two of us trying to be friends is a good place to start.” “Friendship is always good, even if nothing more ever comes of it.” Fluttershy offered the other two mares a smile brimming with warmth and kindness. “I would love to keep being Derpy’s friend, and be better friends with you, Blossomforth. I know you’re both good ponies, and even when you make mistakes, you’re still good deep down.” Blossom hesitantly extended a hoof towards Derpy. “So ... friends?” Derpy took her hoof and slowly shook it. “Friends it is.” Fluttershy gave the two an approving smile. “I think that's a very good first step.” Well, that made for one less problem. It’s amazing how much was getting taken care of once we all sat down and talked things out. Maybe there’s a lesson there; I did need some sort of lesson I’d learned from all this to fill out that report I owed Celestia. Talking to other ponies about your problems instead of letting them get worse seemed like a good moral to the story. In any case, the report to Celestia wasn’t the most important thing on my plate at that moment. The supreme ruler of all Equestria could wait until after I was done taking care of the mares I loved. Now that we’d settled some things about where I stood and gotten things between Derpy and Blossom settled, it was time to deal with what was left of my proper love life. I turned to Blossom and Fluttershy, smiling at both of them. “So I guess the next question is if I can be with both of you at the same time without causing problems.” I thought that over for a minute, then hastily amended, “Well, not the same time. Not that I would mind, but....” Derpy let out a loud snort, grinning and shaking her head at me. “Cloud, you are completely incorrigible. But seriously; baby steps, Cloud.” Blossom and Fluttershy exchanged a look, and then both of them hastily looked away and started blushing. Surprisingly, Fluttershy recovered first. “Um, I think I can be okay with that. I mean, I’m really not sure about this, but if it’s what everypony else wants I can at least try it and see. Only the first type of sharing though, not the second. Not that there’s anything wrong with Blossomforth, she’s a very attractive mare, but it’s just that, um...” “It’s okay, I understand what you meant,” Blossom assured her, giving her a slightly awkward wing-hug. “For what it’s worth, I feel the same way. You’re nice and all, but I’d have to get to know you a lot better before I could even consider more than just being friends.” I grinned at the two of them. The cute blushy awkwardness was adorable, and I didn’t miss the fact that both of them seemed at least somewhat open to the idea of trying a threesome at some undefined point in the distant future. I didn’t want to rush them or make them feel pressured to participate in something they weren’t ready for, but it would be a lie to say that I didn’t want it. What can I say, I’ve got an overactive sex drive, and the idea of having two mares I loved in bed at the same time was ... yum. Still, I had to be responsible about it. “No need to get awkward around each other. Let’s focus on getting a status quo we’re all happy with before we even start thinking about threesomes.” I got up and trotted over to the couch, settling in between Blossom and Fluttershy, then wrapping a wing around each of them. “You two being happy is more important to me than that.” “Thanks, Cloud.” Blossom chuckled and ran a hoof through her mane. “Hay, I’m still a bit amazed you even managed to talk me into taking a try at this whole sharing thing. I guess I’m where Fluttershy is at on it; I’m not one hundred percent sure, but if it’s what you want I’m willing to at least try. Besides, if I tried to chase off every other pony who cares about you I’d wear myself out and probably end up driving you away.” “Yeah, you would,” Derpy replied hollowly. That got a flinch out of me; I guess Derpy had learned that lesson the hard way. Fluttershy spotted the budding conflict and moved quickly to defuse it, offering me a grateful smile and small nuzzle as she quickly shifted the subject. “Thank you for being so understanding about Blossom and I needing some time to adjust, Cloud Kicker. The two of us are going to work very hard at getting along for you.” “Yeah.” Blossom shifted a bit so she could look at Fluttershy without me being in the way. “Though I'd like to be friends with you just for our own sakes. I mean, getting along so Cloud will be happy is all well and good, but I’d also like us to be on good terms just because you’re a nice pony, and I’d be honored to be your friend.” Fluttershy beamed at her. “Thank you, Blossomforth. I’d like to be your friend too.” While the three of us were busily hugging one another, Derpy sat to the side, feeling a bit awkward about getting left out of things. I felt a bit bad about that, but after the talk Blossom and Fluttershy had gone through, they’d more than earned a hug. Still, it’s always awkward when one pony isn’t part of the group hug. Before I could come up with a non-awkward way of inviting her join in, Derpy took the initiative. “Hay with it.” She trotted up to the three of us, and after a moment’s hesitation wrapped her wings around Fluttershy and Blossom, while pulling me in with her forelegs. Fluttershy quickly shifted positions so she could properly join in on the four-way hug as well, smiling and offering a satisfied nod. “There, now everypony's hugging. That’s usually a sign that all the fighting is over, and we can all be friends now.” Blossom nuzzled my cheek while hugging the other two mares. “That sounds about right.” “Group hugs are always the best way to end a conversation,” Derpy agreed. She spent a good while just hanging onto the three of us. Once the hug started winding down, Derpy looked over the three of us, then took a deep breath and said, “My girls need stability. That was always my biggest worry about getting involved with Cloud Kicker, or anypony else for that matter. I didn’t want Dinky and Sparkler dealing with a revolving door of suitors coming and going once I got back into the dating game. More than that, I needed somepony I could count on too. But now ... it seems to me like this could be pretty stable, if it all works out.” That caught my attention. “Derpy? Are you saying...” “No, Cloud.” She sighed, and couldn’t quite bring herself to meet my eyes. “I wish I could just hop right back into bed with you. I still love you, but what happened with Blossomforth and Fluttershy hurt. Maybe I shouldn’t have had such unrealistic expectations of you, but it still hurt.” “No, it’s not all on you.” I gave her a reassuring squeeze. “I’m not saying you had a right to expect exclusivity from me when we’d both agreed that wasn’t on the table, but I should’ve thought more about how my actions affected you. I think it’s fair to say we both messed up.” “Yeah, we did. And we both got hurt by it.” Derpy sighed, slumping down against me. “I’m not ready to risk that again, especially when I’m still not sure about how this multiple relationship thing would work. It sounds good right now, but whether it’ll still be working a year from now...” “I don’t think any of us know that, for sure,” Blossom chimed in. “We’re all in uncharted territory right now. It’s probably going to be hard, and it might end badly. I’m willing to risk it, but ... well, I don’t have kids. You do. That makes a huge difference.” “Yeah, it does.” Derpy frowned and reluctantly broke off from the hug, looking me in the eyes. “But after what happened with your mother and Cirrus ... well, I guess that put some things into perspective for me. Despite everything, I still care about you, and being mad over everything that happened is just too painful. When I heard Canterlot was being attacked, I was just as scared for you as I was for Cirrus. Sparkler was still my number one worry, but you were ... a lot closer than I’d expected.” She took a break to rub her face and gather her thoughts. “I guess what I’m saying is that I’m not ready yet, but don’t count me out.” “Okay.” Not the answer I’d hoped for, but a lot better than I’d had any right to expect. “So that's a very definite maybe?” Derpy offered me a tired but teasing smile. “Maybe.” I reached over and took one of her hooves in my own, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “Derpy, no matter where we end up, I’ll always be there for you. For years before either one of us seriously thought about jumping into bed with the other, we were friends. And I will always be your friend, even if that ‘maybe’ turns out to be a ‘no.’ Same thing goes for your kids.” I turned to Blossom and Fluttershy. “Fair warning, spending so much time with Sparkler and Dinky has woken up my latent maternal instincts. Sparkler and Dinky are ... hay, when I first hooked up with Derpy, I was scared they’d expect me to be some kind of parental figure. Now? Sparkler’s calling me Momma, and once you win over the acceptance of the teenager who has issues with authority figures ... yeah.” Derpy nodded. “You've been great with my girls, even after things got to a bad place with us. If I can trust you with my daughters ... I think there’s a chance I might be able trust you with my heart again. And even if that doesn’t happen, I’m glad we tried. Even if things ended on a bad note, I think the good parts of our relationship outweighed the bad. And what we gained, what my girls gained ... I don’t think you can put a price on that.” We all went quiet after that, giving what Derpy said a bit of time to sink in. Blossom was the one who finally broke the silence. “So where do we go from here?” “Forward.” I was a little surprised when Fluttershy was the one to answer her question. A second later her ears went back on her head, but she smiled at all of us. “Um, I don't entirely know where 'forward' will be, but I think I know a few ponies I'd like to go with.” I smiled at the mares I loved. “Forward it is, then.”