The Wheel and the Butterfly A Dan X Pinkie Pie Saga

by Justice3442


Part 10 Dan & Pinkie Vs. Interspecies Relationship: Chapter 88 Dan Vs. Impending Death

The Wheel and the Butterfly

A Dan X Pinkie Pie saga

Part 10 Dan & Pinkie Vs. Interspecies Relationship

Chapter 88 Dan Vs. Impending Death

-ooooooo-

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!”

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

Dan and Elise continued their frantic sprint down the concrete corridor as the wheeled device Pinkie’s mirror sat on kept pace.

 “After I’m… huffdead I’m going to… puff… haunt the bejesus out of the both of you… huff… two harebrained morons!” Dan cried as he ran as fast his legs would carry him.

“Guessing that’ll… huff… be some comfort… puff… to Pinkie…” Elise mused as she sprinted along dan.

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

“Sorry, Dan…” Twilight said sheepishly from the mirror.

“I mean it!” Dan shouted. “Brutally torn to… huff… shreds in a mating frenzy by… puff … things that look like my girlfriend… huffsounds like a horrible… puff… Freudian nightmare, except it’s… huff…  real and probably going to… puff…  happen to me.”

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

Just shut up and let me think!” Elise cried. “This complex isn’t that big in fact…”

The group turned a corner where one final room full of dusty equipment and cleaning materials awaited them.

“Uh… we just hit the end,” Elise said as the group came to a stop in the room.

“Thanks, Captain obvious.” Dan replied sarcastically.

“Wait!” Elise cried. “I got this…” Elise hit a switch on her controller and a thick steel door sealed the room. Leaving the group in near darkness. The only light coming from Twilight’s mirror.

The cries continued along with frantic pounding on the metal door.

Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

Clank! Clank! Clank!

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

Clank! Clank! Clank!

Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

Clank! Clank! Clank! Clank! Clank! Clank!

“Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan!

The group held their collective breath as eventually the pounding on the metal and cries stopped.

Elise and Twilight breathed a sigh of relief.

Dan folded his arms. “Great, yay, we’re safe,” he said sarcastically as he rolled his eyes. “Now would some PLEASE EXPLAIN WHY THERE ARE DOZENS OF CRAZY PINKIE PIES DESPERATE TO GET BUSY WITH ME!?

Elise and Twilight exchanged pensive glances and looked back at Dan.

“We uh…” Twilight began, “we may have gotten a little uh…”

“Stupid? Moronic? Out of your collective minds?!” Dan suggested.

“Ambitious?” Elise threw out.

Twilight pointed at Elise, “Yes! That! That’s a perfect word to describe what happened.”

“Oh… I like all of mine better!” Dan said in a sardonic tone.

Elise sighed, “Dan, what are you even doing down here?! I thought you were watching Pinkie!”

“I got tired of watching her and monkey-face make food monstrosities and eat them!” Dan explained.

“Monstrosities?” Twilight asked as she cocked an eyebrow.

“Pinkie was quickly consuming every semi-edible thing in the house so I gave Chris a bunch of money to buy food and he came back with what looked like the entire contents of a Seven Eleven…” Dan paused, “And some apples that Pinkie devoured. Apparently eating an entire bushel of apples takes one on some sort of spiritual journey…” Dan explained. He shook his head, “As if what was in her system wasn’t enough…”

>-oooooo-<

“Dan! I’m in it! I’m in the cosmos itself, I can see, feel, smell, hear, and even taste all of existence!”

Dan sighed as he looked down at Pinkie. The pink mare was laying on her side, the blacks of her pupils almost having completely swallowed her sky-blue irises.

“That’s great, goofball…” Dan uttered

Everything tastes like snozzberries, Dan!”

Dan rolled his eyes, “I’m sure it does.”

“No! You don’t get it! You, me, this delicious floor…” with a loud ‘Slurp!’ Pinkie licked the floor, “…taste like snozzberries!”

Chris sat down another basket of apples next to Pinkie and began munching on them.

Dan cocked an eyebrow at him, “What the heck do you think you’re doing, Monkey-face?”

“Dwan!” Chris cried as through a mouthful of apple, he swallowed, “This is incredible! Pinkie as reached Foodvana!”

“I don’t even want to know…” Dan replied.

“It’s a place where one’s spirit is one with food!” Chris explained.

“WHAT DID I JUST SAY?!” Dan roared in reply.

 “And I’m going to eat all these apples until I’m there too!” Chris explained as he took an apple up to his mouth and bit into it.

Dan opted to smack his hand against his forehead in lieu of a response.

<-oooooo->

“You gave Chris a free reign to buy groceries?! Are you out of your mind?!” Elise cried.

Dan glared at her, “Excuse you, but I’m trying to keep my currently crazed girlfriend satiated here! Thanks for compounding the problem immensely, by the way!”

Elise paused took a few calming breaths and looked back up at Dan, “Alright Dan, I get it…”

“I’m not sure you do!” Dan cried. “If you did you wouldn’t have made more problems for us to deal with, AND WE WOULDN’T BE STUCK IN STORAGE CLOSET.”

“We didn’t mean to make Pinkie clones…” Twilight interjected “Well… the first one, anyhow…”

Dan shifted his angry glare to Twilight, “Oh?! And making more wasn’t a horrendously stupid idea, because…?”

“Hey!” Twilight protested. “We were going to use them to find a way to turn Pinkie back to human! We were trying to help!”

“YOUR HELP ALMOST GOT ME KILLED!” Dan roared.

“Leave her alone!” Elise shouted. “We didn’t know you’d come down here at the worse possible moment!”

“Oh what, so this is my fault!?” Dan said.

Clank!

Twilight’s ears perked up at the sound of metal being hit again, she shifted her gaze to the door.

“It usually is!” Elise retorted.

Dan sighed, “Right! Here we go again… Everything’s Dan’s fault!” Dan said sarcastically, “Dan encouraged you two to create a swarm of uncontrollable Pinkie Pies!”

“Guys?!” Twilight said.

Clank!

“Well, we wouldn’t had to do that if you… Uh…” Elise paused and trailed off.

“If I what?!” Dan said. “Go on! TELL ME HOW THIS IS MY FAULT!”

“Erm… it’ll come to me…”

“GUYS! DOOR!” Twilight said in a panicked tone.

Dan and Elise stopped arguing and noticed the door was now off the ground by a few inches. A cute, pink muzzle sat wedged in the small crack between metal and concrete.

An odd, rhythmic, mechanical sound began to ring out from behind the door.

‘Keeekrrkeeekrrrkeeekee…’

Dan, Elise, and Twilight looked on in horror as the muzzle slowly lifted off the ground, bringing the door up with it.

“What?! How are they…?” Elise began.

Dan smacked his palm against his forehead, “Because they’re Pinkies…”

As the Pinkies in the hallway became visible, the group could see how they where raising the door. The Pinkie in front slowly raised its head in rhythm to two Pinkie’s pumping its tail up and down, as if the pink mare was some sort of giant, hairy, car jack.

‘KeeekrrkeeekrrrkeeekrrrCLANK!

The door metal rang out loudly as it was returned to its slot.

Elise tried the button once more. A small shower of sparks emerged from doorway, but the door remained in place. “No good… they must have strained the servos when they forced the door open.”

Dan rolled his eyes, “Surprise, surprise, Elise continues to be useless.”

“Dan! Stop picking on her,” Twilight said, “We need a plan.”

“Kinda late for that, Sparkler,” Dan replied.

Dan and Elise paused and looked up at the dozens of mad, hungry eyes that all fixed their gaze upon Dan. The group of Pinkie clones all parted their lips and pulled them up and towards the sides of their faces, revealing crazed, ravenous grins.  

“What are they waiting for…?” Elise whispered.

“Who knows… probably figuring out how small the pieces of me need to be to split amongst them all,” Dan said flatly.

Elise and Twilight winced.

Dan sighed, “Thanks for helping me get killed, Elise. You too, Sparkler. Glad to see getting you two science geeks together resulted in total catastrophe.”

One of the Pinkie’s stepped forward, continuing its chant in a low, or as low as the pink pony could muster, husky tone. “Dan! Dan! Dan! Dan! Fun! Dan! Dan! Fun!

Dan flinched and turned his attention to the mare. He slowly began to back away. “Well, wish I could say it’s been nice knowing you two,” Dan said, “but given the circumstances here, I’m kinda hopping you die a grizzly death, Elise.”

Elise rolled her eyes, “Thanks, Dan.”

Dan looked at Twilight, “Guess you’re not in danger, so please at least have the courtesy to let our gruesome demise haunt you.”

Twilight looked at Dan as determination spread itself across her face like a flash flood that washed away her worry.

The lead pink mare leapt into the air.

Dan instinctively placed his arms in front of his face as the pink mare went airborne.

Elise stepped in-between Dan as the pony flew forward.

“Elise, wha…”

In a flash, the space right in front of Elise began to glow a shimmering, translucent purple.

Fthowmp!

There was a ripple of purple energy as the pink mare hit a magic shield that blocked the two humans and mirror from the ponies’ pounce. She was thrown back into the mix of crazed clones. The mares’ eyes shifted from hungry, to desperate as they swarmed the shield and began violently pounding on it, causing it to ripple violently under the onslaught.

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

“Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

 “Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

‘Fthowmp! Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

“Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun!

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!”

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp!!

“Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!’

“Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun!

Elise breathed a sigh of relief, “Thank you, Twilight.”

“Don’t…huff… thank me… puff… yet…” Twilight said in between deep, laborious breaths, “I can’t…” Twilight swallowed, “… can’t hold this… huff… shield for very long… puff… Not across dimensions…not with them attacking it.”

“Oh…” Elise uttered as she looked out at the herd of Pinkies, “Well… maybe they’ll all explode before…”

DaaaaaaaaaaAAANNNNNNNNN

‘POP!’

A pink goo showered the shield briefly as the pounding and cries continued.

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

“Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!”

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp!!

“Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp!!

“See!” Elise said hopefully.

Twilight shook her head as tears began to stream from her eyes, “I don’t…”Twilight exhaled, “… fffffffssss… I don’t think so…”

Dan shot another glare at Elise and Twilight. “Thanks for making clones of my girlfriend that explode horrifically, by the way! I was worried I was going to sleep soundly through the night… you know…” Dan held his palm up matter of factually… “not that it matters with my impending death, and all…Also, what the heck was with that diving in front of me nonsense?!” Dan asked.

“Not the time, Dan,” Elise said.

“In case you hadn’t noticed, there isn’t going to be another time!” Dan cried.

Elise sighed, “Look, I felt bad, alright? I FEEL bad! Aside from popping up at the wrong time, none of this is your fault.” Elise shook her head, “And… it’s not fair for me to bring this on you.”

Dan looked at Twilight, “I take it you talked to her?”

“There… wheeze… may have been… huffpuffhuffpuff…some words offered in your defense… for what it’s worth… I feel terrible…” Twilight gasped a large volume of air and let it slowly escape her lips, “…Huuuuuuuffffffffuuuu… about this, too… and… ”

“Dan,” Elise began, “I’m… sorry, alright? Chris having you as a best friend hasn’t always been easy, in fact it’s almost never been easy…”

“…You suck at this final confession thing, by the way,” Dan said.

Elise ignored him, “But… you don’t deserve this… no one does… and you make Pinkie, extraordinarily happy… and you love her… anyone could see that… you actually truly love and care for her… and I guess… between that and this being partially my fault, I couldn’t just let them have you...”

“Oh…” Dan replied, not quite sure how he should reply. “Uh... Look… er… I guess you haven’t been a completely horrible wife to Chris and… as far as banes of my existence go, you’re… alright?” Dan offered.

“… You suck at this, too, you know,” Elise said with a smirk.

“Shut up! Look… I guess you two psychos probably meant well… so… I guess I maybe, sorta, kinda, I don’t hate you so much as I did a minute ago…”

Elise chuckled, “Good enough for me.”

Guuuuuys?!” Twilight uttered in a panicked tone.

“Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!”

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

“Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

‘Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

“Dan! Fun! Dan!”

Dan pushed Elise aside and stepped towards the mirror. “Stand back, Elise…”

Elise shot Dan a confused look, “Don’t tell me you’ve gone all noble on us…”

Dan nodded his head, “This is your mess, but they’re after me. Just… take care of Goofball and Monkey-Face for me.”

“What?! DAN! You can’t…!” Elise protested.

DON’T TELL ME WHAT I CAN AND CAN’T DO!” Dan roared. “I’m sure right now you’re telling yourself that you’re going to leap right in there and try to keep me safe with that arsenal of weapons you keep on you…”

“Uh… actually, I lost all those between changing clothing and fighting a pink, slime monster…” Elise said sheepishly.

Dan sighed, “Figures… anyways, DON’T help. Those two idiots need someone to look after them, they’re hopeless on their own.”

“Dan!” Elise said in a protesting tone as tears began to stream from her eyes, “You can’t… Pinkie will never forgi…”

“Oh yeah,” Dan said as he glanced behind him. A small purple glint off droplets around his eyes betrayed his otherwise cool and collected expression. “Tell Goofball that I love her… more than anything… and that I forgive her for how she’s acted today…”

“Dan! Fun! Dan! hmmmmmm… Fun! Dan! Dan! Fun! Dan!

‘Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan! Fun! Dan!

Fthowmp! Fthowmp! Fthowmp!

Twilight continued the strenuous task of holding the shield up as her breathing became increasingly labored. Despite her focus being on the shield, her ears picked up a something strange from the group of Pinkies.

Did… did one of the Pinkie’s… whimper?

Twilight quickly scanned the group of Pinkies.

“DAN! I CAN’T LET YOU DO THIS ALONE!” Elise cried as she placed her hands on the short man’s shoulders.

“YES YOU CAN!” Dan said as he brushed Elise’s hand aside. “As incredibly ironic as it would be to have you die trying to save me, Chris and Pinkie are going to need you!”  Dan shook his head. “You’re strong. They’re not. And there’s no way they’d be able to get over losing both of us.”

“E…Elise… “Twilight said before exhaling a large volume of air, “…SSUUUUUUUFFffffffffuuuu…” sweat began to pour from the purple mare’s face, “let… let him go… huuuffsssuuu… it’ll… it’ll be alright…”

“NO IT WON’T!” Elise shouted as the trickles from her eyes turned to streams.

“You have to… fuuuuuusssshHUUUUU… trust me…”

Elise bit her lower lip and nodded.

Twilight turned to Dan. “Dan… fuuusssh… step a bit to the left…

Dan shot Twilight a confused look shifted his position slightly.

“YOUR… HUUUUUUUUUUUUUFFFFFFFFFSSSSS… LEFT!” Twilight corrected.

“Oh…” Dan shifted again. “Uh, here?”

Twilight nodded.

“Uh, hey Twilight… just uh… just try to get Pinkie home, alright?” Dan said.

“Sa…sure…  shhheeeeeeefuuu… Dan?” Twilight asked as the sweat began to drip from entire body, forming a pool under her.

“Yeah, Twilight?”

Twilight swallowed, “Hold on tight.”

Suddenly the shimmering light from the purple shield was gone as Dan felt a set of teeth clamp onto his jeans and pull him into the mass of pink ponies.