Doctor Whooves (The Doctor in Equestria)

by OneCoolBrony


The One Who Performs

Octavia was preparing in the concert hall, first to arrive as always. Frederick Horshoepin would arrive soon, followed by Concerto, and Beauty Brass somewhat later. With a sigh she balanced herself on her hind legs, a position she had managed to become comfortable with through years of playing. Her cello balanced delicately in one hoof, bow in the other, she drew the bow across the strings on the cello and let the note resonate. The beautifully perfect note carried it's sole vibration throughout every seat and up into every balcony in the hall. Inhaling, she once again summoned noise from her instrument, letting it wash over every surface that was unobstructed. After the last note died out, she prepared herself again, this time to play the piece that her quartet was going to be performing at their next gala or concert, which ever came first. Reaching the fifth measure, she heard a door outside open and close. Odd, she thought Frederick doesn't usually show up for another fifteen minutes. Carrying on through the slight disturbance outside, she had barely begun measure fourteen when a horrible noise erupted from behind the stage, sending shivers down her spine. The noise of a house key being dragged up and down a piano string. In all likelihood, it was Beauty Brass, who had reveled in the knowledge that Octavia despised any instrument making a noise it was not intended to. She had been pranking Octavia at irregular intervals, starting first by somehow making a clarinet sound like a trumpet, and most recently by plucking the strings on Concerto's violin as though it were a guitar. Now she was messing with Frederick's piano. Oh boy, if that mare touched her cello, Celestia know's that there'd be Tartarus to pay. "Beauty Brass!" Octavia shouted to the curtain "Frederick is going to kill you when he finds out you've been assaulting his piano!"

What happened next made absolutely no sense to Octavia. Bursting forth from the doors was certainly NOT who she had expected to enter. A small troupe of ponies wearing strange grey and blue armour that came up to their chins (which seemed weird up until the point when you realized they had either no necks, or the shortest necks she'd ever seen). They were marched in formation passing the chairs and approaching the stage, though they were still relatively far away. As they passed each row, Octavia realized that the beings inside the armour were incredibly short, standing barely above the height of a filly. There was some strange device strapped across the front of each soldier (any other description would not suit them as she could think of no other term to place on the things she was looking at). Marching on either side of the middle portion of seats, and approaching down the row, the ponies never broke formation, choosing uniformity over any other approach. Just when she was just about overwhelmed, a stallion with a light brown coat and tie on approached her from behind, his hoofsteps had been so quiet that she had not heard him coming.

"Listen, I can help you out of this situation, I promise. But you have to trust me, do you understand?" It was crazy, everything around her and the only thing she could register at the moment was Fancy that, he has a Griffish accent, just like me. , though she managed to dumbly nod her head. The stallion spoke up again "Do you trust me?" This time sound found it's way out of her throat and she said something that kind of sounded like "Uh-huh", though she wasn't too sure. "Excellent, now follow me, quickly!" The light brown stallion took her by the hoof and hurriedly led her behind the curtain, stopping in front of a large blue box and turning to her. "Okay, you're gonna be confused for a moment, and that's okay, but we really don't have time to talk. I promise you, I'll explain everything I can when it's safe." Those words being said he opened the doors and pushed her inside, where she was confronted by the strangest bit yet. "Huzzuh-wuh?" Wow, Octavia, that was incredibly un-lady-like of you. The stallion laughed a little at that, then threw a lever, the piano-string noise making it's grand re-appearance. And after a bout of shaking and incredible noise, all was still. Octavia had not moved a centimeter, eye twitching and mouth agape as she still tried to process what in the hoof just happened.

"Nice bow-tie." The Doctor was trying to make conversation, though was awkwardly failing at it. After all, how does one pick up from "Hey, follow me and I'll stuff you into my box"? She had not changed for four minutes, opting to stand there awe-struck and utterly confused rather than to make an attempt at intelligent conversation. She probably doesn't trust herself to open her mouth and not making gurgling sounds. That sounds kind of mean though, I'm rather rude this time round, huh? Eventually Octavia managed to say something, though before she had said it she had carefully and precisely sounded out every bit in her head, saying it over and over again, so as not to mess any of it up. "What?" The Doctor smiled, his visitor finally having opened up. "Ah! I said I like your bow-tie!" She shook her head. "No. I mean, 'What?'" The Doctor nodded, "Mhmm, that's okay. Perfectly natural. Actually, that's a perfectly acceptable and normal question. And I'm glad you asked it! 'Fraid I'm gonna have to ask you to narrow it down a bit though." Octavia swallowed hard, nodding slowly, preparing to meet his request "The box. It's..." she sort of trailed off, not finishing the sentence. The Doctor nodded anxiously, ever aware of his most favourite of phrases. "Go on. It's what?" "It's," she started again, still utterly confused by everything, "bigger. On the inside." The Doctor nodded excitedly. "Yeah, it is! Isn't it great?!" Octavia almost looked like she was raising an eyebrow, but was clearly so out of it that it could have just been a twitch, "I... suppose." The Doctor cleared his throat, "So, next question."

"Those ponies," Octavia started, "who... what are they?"
The Doctor nodded understandingly, "They were ponies, weren't they? Which is strange, because from my universe, they're at least hominid."
"Homined?"
"Hominid, yes, means they're bipedal, walk on two legs. Most also sport opposable thumbs. Making it so you can grip things without freaky mind powers."
"Oh.. okay... but what are they?"
"Ah, they're aliens."
"A...Aliens?!"
"Yeah, Sontarans, to be "T", they're a bunch a clones, on and all. Nasty bunch a warriors too."
"So... why are they here?"
"No clue, none whatsoever. But I'll tell you what, they're not here to make friends. So, we need to stop them before anyone gets hurt."
"Do we know where they are going?"
"Nope, but I'd bet we could figure it out. Come on, let's go on back to that place, we can find out what they're planning there."
"Oh my Celestia..."
"I'm sorry, what? Why, what's wrong?"
"Frederick, Concerto, and Beauty Brass! We had rehearsal!"
"Don't worry, I'm sure you can explain to them your absence when next you show up at rehearsal."
"That's just it! I was at rehearsal!"
"Oh. Let's go, quickly. The less lives lost, the better."

Ugh, there's the piano string again. That madstallion should really fix whatever is making that noise. Also I could do without all the shaking, it's a bit over dramatic. "Aright we're here." The two stepped out of the TARDIS and headed out onto the stage. "Now, where is here, exactly?" Octavia was searching for any signs of her ensemble, when she answered his question. "We are in the concert hall of Canterlot." The Doctor looked kind of surprised. "Seriously? What is up with this city that so many are trying to get here? It's actually kind of ridiculous!" Octavia shrugged at the brown stallion, not quite sure what exactly he meant. Also, what is his name? "Um, pardon. But I don't believe I remember you're name." The brown time traveler smiled, "Oh, that'd be because ya didn't ask! I'm The Doctor, and you would be the ever-lovely..." "Octavia," The grey mare smiled, "and thank you." The Doctor nodded and re-oriented himself so that he was facing at the seating. "So, I assume that we are headed wherever the military are?" The Doctor nodded, "Or more likely, it will be the military will be headed wherever they are. Seeing as you've not even achieved interstellar travel, they probably wound up here on accident. We can just explain to them that you are a non-warring race, though are highly capable of defending yourselves, and on a good day, they'll take their leave." Octavia kind of gave him a funny look, "On a good day? What happens on a bad day?" "On a bad day," The Doctor replied, "they'll wipe out your entire race and any others they find on this planet." The Doctor shrugged and continued down the stairs and on towards the exit of the hall.

Princess Celestia sat on her throne staring at the massive pane window on the far side of the room. She wasn't really looking at anything, her eyes were on a sort of break, as her ears worked overtime to cover the shift. Echoing through the halls of the palace, filling her highness with anxiety and (though she'd barely even admit it to herself) fear, were the most uniform, synchronous hoof-falls she'd ever heard, highly trained, and never interrupted, save for the occasional grunt or "Halt!" by the royal guardsponies. She sat, patiently, cooly, the only ways she'd carried herself for the past thousand years or so. She would turn into her essential form, should it be the only way to defend her ponies, but she would rather avoid war, rather take the diplomatic approach, rather wait for him.

The Doctor was not at all happy when the first sight that greeted him at the palace was that of a set of unconscious guards. Rather than try to seize him (which seemed to be an ever-popular decision on their part) they were lying, motionless, on either side of the entrance to the castle. "Oh my Celestia..." Octavia was covering her mouth with a hoof, biting back tears of fear. All of this was so new to her, and what terrifying way for everything to have been introduced. "Dear me," The Doctor began, "I think we've found them, Octavia, and hopefully in time." The Doctor turned his head towards Octavia giving her a reassuring smile that made her want to confront, rather than flee, the invaders. The Doctor bolted into the castle, and without hesitation, Octavia followed closely, feeling *(she was sure) just as confident as that wacky stallion right in front of her.

"A left, then a right, then straight up the middle..." The Doctor was shouting directions as they rounded turns, narrating every step of the way. "How do you know where you're going? And also how do you know they won't beat us there? We were gone for quite some time!" The Doctor laughed, glad that this one was inquisitive as well as wise. "1: I've been here before, and I don't forget things often, so I may know where to go! B: They're likely doing a sweep of the entire castle as a single unit, not knowing enough about your military to know what would be a safe number to divide and conquer in. If they've already done that, then hopefully we'll manage to catch them in the throne room! Also, we've only been gone for a minute!" Octavia maintained a steady pace behing the chestnut earth pony, but had to think hard for a moment, then shouted ahead, "Pull the other three!" The Doctor laughed at that, ordering his assistant, "Come on!" He lowered his head and put on a hard sprint, Octavia following suit and staying close.

As the armoured troupe of ponies entered the throne room, the guard on the inside right attempted to halt them, and was butted to the side with one of their weapons. Seeing this, his fellow guard lowered his spear at the assault and was immediately blasted in the chest, sending him backwards and a light trail of smoke accompanying him. Princess Celestia swallowed hard, but otherwise did not react. The troupe formed the Perfect Quadrilateral in front of Her Serene Highness, The Wise Princess Celestia. She, maintaining the air of omnipotence, blinked slowly as she lowered her head to level her eyes at them. The kindness and hatred simultaneously felt in that stare could have been enough to kill a small mammal, but the unit stayed otherwise pillar-like. That is when one stepped forward. "So you have declared war on our species?"

"Buahaha! Yep! Oh sure. *gasp* Definitely, that's why they were ready for you! *gasp*" In through the entrance they had just made passage through, struggled a spikey-maned Time Lord that a certain Princess Celestia was all too glad to see. Gasping for air, he held out a hoof to indicate that he needed a minute. When he was finished, he spoke again, "So let me get this straight," The Doctor started, approaching whom he assumed was the commanding officer, "you think, they declared war on you? Well I'll be damned if that isn't the silliest thing I've ever heard!" The stout pony maintained the look of discipline as he replied to the statement. "Not think, know. We received a declaration of war from the coordinates of this exact point, on this exact planet." The Doctor nodded. "Is that so? Well honestly, I don't even think that's possible for them." This was when the alien turned to face The Doctor. "Anypony, anywhere, can start a war, civilian." The Doctor made a mildy-amused-slash-slightly-impressed-though-not-really frown, and nodded his head. "True enough, yeah. But they can't really do that when they haven't evEN INVENTED DIGITAL COMMUNICATION!!!!" The Doctor paused, and sighed with a smile. "What I meant is, they wouldn't even have the capability to contact you, let alone declare interstellar war."
"Is this so?"
"It is." The Doctor confirmed for the ranking commander, feeling satisfied.
"And these are a non-warring race?"
"They are, my good Sontaran."
"Then this is most fortunate," The Doctor looked slightly befuddled, never before had a Sontaran been happy about NOT fighting, "yes, this is most fortunate! The Pontarans are in need of slaves."

"WHAT?!?!" This was pretty much the agreed on sentiment of everypony present. "Oh no you don't! I'll not be having you enslave any of the inhabitants of this planet while I have any say in it!" "And WHO are you to have a say in it, hmm, Doctor?" Octavia was the one to prose the question, rather than the Pontaran. Upon hearing the name 'Doctor', however, several of the soldiers twitched. Ever so slightly, but enough to be detected. "I'm glad you asked, my dear Octavia! Why, it would seem, that our friends the Son... Pontarans here recognize it! But I won't trouble them to tell you, I'll just relieve that burden from them and tell you aaaaall about me. Ahem. I am The Doctor, saviour of 479 recognized planets and 7345 affiliated worlds. I'm the last of the noble Time Lord race and a damn good detective. I also dabble in law, response to those in duress, and... execution. Now these fine fellows here haven't really done anything illegal, so they're off the hook for the most part. But sometimes I adhere to my own code, before I do any sort of law. I'm gonna tell you fellows straight," The Doctor turned to the Pontarans, whom he'd really been talking to the whole time. "if you touch a hair on the head of the youngest male, to one on the head of the oldest female, I will not hesitate to do any number of punishments to your unit, including and especially, stripping the lot of you of any sort of military status you have, or will ever, earn. Do I make myself clear?"

"We will make our leave, Doctor, but do not think that this event is forgotten. The Pontarans will be back when this race is prepared, for to defeat them now would bring no honor to any of us."

The Doctor sighed a heavy sigh of relief through his nostrils. Wow! Did I really defeat the Sontarans without conflict? As the Pontarans began to exit through the door opposite the on they entered, Straight Shot awoke from his knowledge-less state and saw the enemy with their back to him. Knowing this would be his only chance, he heaved his spear straight into the back of one of strange ponies nearly non-existent neck, who crumpled instantly. A new stallion turned to him and shouted, "NO, YOU FOOL! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!" Straight Shot was slightly confused by this, and this distraction cost him. He was drilled in the chest by a heavy laser, throwing him back against the wall. Luckily, the charms on his armour protected him from bolt magic (Wards were a standard part of any good military's armour) though he felt like he never wanted to move again. He rose to his hooves and saw a contingency of guards flooding in through the arch to his right, and the unwelcome visitors firing magic from their weapons. There was a war waging in the throne room.

Octavia, The Doctor, and Celestia were taking cover behind the massive throne (The Doctor had had to convince the princess to abandon her post). The Doctor looked at Celestia with a great sadness. "Yours are going to lose. There's no way they can win. It's not a matter of training, it's a matter of culture. They eat, sleep, and drink war. War is their ONLY art ." Octavia turned to him with a jerk and almost excitedly said, "You're sure? They've never been introduced to any of the arts?" The Doctor was still concerned, but liked that she had an idea, "No, or at least, not as we know arts." Octavia nodded. "That is all I needed to hear. Doctor, watch the princess please, I will return post-haste." And with that, the grey mare launched off of her hooves and out the throne room through the side of the royal guards, who had been to distracted by the gunfire to even notice her.

------------------------------------------------------------15 minutes------------------------------------------------------------------

The throne room was still filled with echoes of blasts and screams and war cries even long after Octavia had fled. Neither side wanted the other to gain this spot, it being significant as the first ground of battle in what would likely be a long war. Neither side, however, was prepared for what they all heard. Even The Doctor was somewhat awed. Blanketing the battle was the sound of one, long, beauteous cello note.

Octavia hadn't brought music, she hadn't thought to. What she played, was her heart and soul. She poured into this impromptu arrangement all the excitement, fear, surprise, discovery, and loveliness of all that had transpired since little over an hour ago. It was staccato, then just as quickly legato. Her head seemed to indicate the positioning of the imaginary notes, bobbing soulfully along to the arrangement. Whole notes and eight notes, magically combined in a magnificent composition that effectively ceased all of the fighting in the room. Twenty minutes of heart and soul. Never resting for longer than was necessary, and when she had been out of events for that day, she just ended the piece, yet not without the grace that the entire solo had consisted of.

After an hour of talks of peace and promise of future war, the Pontarans left. The Doctor was satisfied, as no ponies were enslaved, few were killed, and an entire race had found the beauty of music. Still, even thinking about Octavia's solo gave him chills, and he was excited to get back to the TARDIS.

Back at the TARDIS, The Doctor stood outside it's doors. He smiled as he chatted with Octavia. When at last the conversation had died down, he took a deep breath. "Octavia, today you showed me that threats and declaration of law are not the only mediums of confrontation, but that the magic of music holds it's own power. Would you do me the honor of having someone as magnificent as yourself accompany me on my journeys?" Octavia smiled and almost giggled, nodding excitedly. "Yes please! If, um, it's not too much trouble." The Doctor threw open the doors, "Trouble? I AM trouble! Come on in!"