//------------------------------// // Well, This Wasn't What I Was Expecting // Story: I Present To You: New Capteinia! // by Madame Hellspawn //------------------------------// “Yes! Off to the exciting land of new adventures!” -Zee Captain He wasn’t sure what happened or why it had happened, but after all he’d been through, this had to be one of the most normal things to happen yet. He was hurling through the air, flipping numerous times until he landed face first into the snow covered ground. A pang of pain in his chest made him clutch the crimson mass that grew there. Of course it was still there. It was probably the reason why he was still alive right now. It didn't say anything though, it just stuck to his chest and kinda hung there. After Pilot's latest stunt, he knew that he had to think of a way to get him back for that one. Charles, or Snippy as he tended to be called, raised himself from the grassy floors of the forest and rubbed his head, or at least his mask. He traced his hand along the ground, trying to judge if all that was around him was really there. The snow, grass underneath it, and actual dirt underneath that. His mind drifted to the three who were originally with him earlier. Were they really gone? Finally? Underneath his mask, Snippy felt a smile creep on his face, for the first time in years. Energy rippled through his body as he stood on his feet and threw his arms in the air in a strange form of celebration. The trees around him were removed of all their leaves, but buckets sat below the branches. He wasn't sure what the buckets were for, but he didn't care. He was in a forest! A forest that looked slightly out of place to Snippy, but the snow was what made him feel slightly at home. If home was a forest devoid of any civilization and human contact. At least it was devoid of any human contact. But there had to be some kind of human life somewhere. He was still alive and there had to be others close by. But he was away fromthem. But that wasn’t even the best part. He was in a forest! A real forest. Not some projection on a screen of what it would have looked like, though the projections were damn accurate, but he was really here! Dead leaves on the ground, covered by the white snow. Branches of trees and tiny blades of grass poking from the ground. He thought about how much the other three were missing out. Pilot would probably love it. If they’re not here, Snippy thought quickly, his mind rushing back to Captain’s crew, putting his arms down. Then that means I’m alone. Again.  Snippy kicked the fallen leaves and snow on the ground in a mix of frustration and happiness. He never particularly liked them, but they were, without a doubt, his only way of not becoming insane. The shenanigans that they'd get into he was definitely not going to miss. He was glad to be rid of that Damn crimson scarf they all called cancer for whatever reason. He wasn't sure if he was glad to be away from the mentally declining Captain and the completely insane Pilot or not. Engineer was just a weird character, but Snippy wasn't really sure about him. He still had hopes that they were alive and that he'd find Engineer first. He'd much rather find the most sane person than someone like The Captain. “Snippy!” The familiar german accent called from above. He looked around, only to find a black form with purple glowing eyes staring back at him thrashing wildly in the trees. He held his boring old white and black mug with a heart sloppily designed onto it, upside down, its contents still inside, judging by the steam coming out of it. A single straw sprouted from the mug, bringing back strange memories of it talking to Snippy. Four threads of string managed to keep him suspended on a thin branch, though the branch was close to snapping off.  “I have a new mission for you!” The Captain, or 'Zee' Captain, as he likes to be called, threw a rotting stick at Snippy, the crooked twig landing right at his feet. “Do you mind getting me down with zat? Be careful, zee edges are very sharp!” Snippy picked up the twig, only to having it snap in his hands. “This is a stick.” “Which means you can cut zee strings! Go on, you don’t want coffee do you?” Captain wiggled his mug around, the scorching liquid inside splashing out onto the ground. Snippy shivered at the sight, and approached with caution, grabbing the string that had tangled around Captain’s leg. He used the stick to try and cut the thin string, but looked up when he figured out what he was doing. Snippy leaped up in the air and grabbed the branch that Captain had hung off of, grasped it in a firm grip, and brought it down with him as he landed, earning a loud CRACK sound that echoed through the woods. Captain fell from the tree, spilling his coffee all over the snow covered ground, melting the snow, but not landing one drop on himself. Unfortunately. “Captain!” Another voice called out. Both looked over to the western edge of the clearing; watching as their third crewmate, Pilot, crashed into the ground, though how he did so remained a mystery. His green goggles glowed dimly, snow beginning to cover them. In his hand was a toy airplane with the two wings missing. “We’ve landed! Only One casualty sir!” Snippy, slammed a hand on his face and shook his head. “Idiot.” Captain regained his normal composure; standing in a formal manner with a hand in his pocket, the other carrying his dusty old mug. “Where is my intern!?” Snippy looked around. Pilot was still curled up on the ground, playing with his broken plane like a child playing with a new toy. Captain was....well right beside him, and Engie was nowhere in sight. And if Snippy knew Captain as well as he thought he did, then he’d most likely order for a- “New mission!” Captain’s voice rang out like a woman singing in a shower. A folding chair had appeared in his hand and he rested it down in the center of the clearing, then proceeded to sit down. “Find my intern! I need him to build me a battle-ready bathtub! Well? Go on, both of you. Ooh, and if you can, find me a nice scarf while you’re at it? I do so love being fashionable.” Snippy glanced over at Pilot, who stood on his feet instantaneously and saluted like the good trooper he was. “Yessir.” Well, I might as well get to it. Snippy admitted. He didn’t want to get splashed with hot, scorching coffee again. Even though most of it spilled from the mug Captain held, it would fill itself back up, and Snippy wouldn’t wait until it did. It was either get on with this new mission, or wait to get his body burned. Plus it also gave him a chance to get away from the lunatic. Even if it meant leaving him here. Still, there was nothing stopping him from instantly appearing beside him out of nowhere. “C’mon buddy,” Pilot said, grabbing Snippy’s hand. “Let’s frolic through the woods like real men. Together, we can discover the magic...of friendship!” Snippy had let go of Pilot’s hand about an hour ago. A bad idea now that he thought about it. Snippy wasn’t one for skipping around like an idiot, but unfortunately for him, Pilot was. He’d lost sight of the green goggled buffoon minutes ago, only knowing that he skipped ahead while trapped in his own little world chasing down some kind of animal that only he could see. It must suck having the mind of a small child. Pulling on his hood to make sure it was down all the way, Snippy let out an unsatisfied sigh and jammed his hands in his pockets. He wished he had his backpack with him, but that was gone, as was his rifle. It would have made him feel safer in the woods. Especially since this was an environment he’s only read about in books as a child. He still couldn’t believe that he was walking through real woods, hearing real animals and birds chirping. It all seemed like a dream, but Snippy pinched himself enough times to know that this was all real. “Snippy!” Pilots excited voice called in the distance, the childish man hopping out of a veil of trees shortly after. “I think I found something!” “This better be good,” Snippy muttered to himself. He followed Pilot, his boots crunching the snow, leaves and twigs beneath his feet, taking joy in every step. He didn’t want to show the amount of fun he was having just by doing it though. Not around Pilot. The two walked for a solid five minutes before the trees began to separate. A wooden picket fence was set up, blocking their path only slightly. The wood looked new, hell, it even smelled new, if the filters in Snippy’s mask was working properly. The trees behind the fence grew tall, though not as tall as the ones in the forest they had just emerged from. Only a few of them contained these red orb things. Apples? Full apples? As far as Snippy knew, they couldn’t grow in the winter, but he didn’t know much about nature anyway, so he couldn’t really say much there. Pilot hopped the fence first, Snippy following closely behind. This would have been the perfect time to have a weapon. Two buildings were straight ahead, and knowing any modern human, they’ most likely shoot first, shoot again, and then shoot one more time, then leave without questioning anything. Snippy tried to stay as close to the ground as possible, as opposed to the direct hopping and bouncing of Pilot, who was practically screaming ‘shoot me!’. “I hope we have good company!” Pilot said with excitement. “I’d hate to have to kill someone!” Snippy rolled his eyes under his mask, but trudged forward nonetheless. As childish as he was, Pilot knew how to defend himself, as was shown the last couple of times the two fought each other. Snippy shuddered at the memory of waking up with half a blade plunged into his chest. “What in tarnation!?” Snippy didn’t have much time to turn around to see who or what had said that, but he was sure that before he got knocked out, a horse had appeared behind him and slammed its hooves into his face. A few seconds after hitting the ground, he saw the horse turn around and jump at Pilot. Then he blacked out, a question begging to be answered before he did:Why was the horse orange? Applejack generally hated the winter. It was at this time that her crops never really grew. Of course, this years winter hadn’t been too kind either. Coming back from the freezing marketplace with Applebloom beside her was one of her least favorite things to do. She appreciated her little sister’s presence, but hated having to navigate through the thin veil of snow. Ponies around her seemed to have more difficulty than her though, so there was one thing that made her feel a little better. Besides that, she wanted to get home as quickly as possible. Her bags hung by her sides, full of fresh new fruits and vegetables that couldn’t be grown back home at the farm. Ingredients for soup that night also filled her bags. Fortunately for Applebloom, Applejack was stuck carrying all of the stuff. She struggled while her little sister hopped around, giggling in the snow, earning a grin from Applejack. “Maybe tomorrow, the Crusaders and I can shovel the snow for money!” Applebloom said with an eagerness in her voice. “Then we could get our cutie marks in snow shovelin’!” “Didn’t you guys try that last winter?” Applejack asked. “Well, yeah, but maybe this time’ll be different. Y’never know!” Applejack just chuckled in response. Thanks to the work of Big Mac, the path to the farm had been cleared of all snow, though at the current rate of the snowfall, it seemed like all his work would have been for nothing. He still did a good job, nonetheless. The apple trees that made Sweet Apple Acres famous were all missing their leaves, and only a few apples grew, but the ones that did were beginning to shrivel up and die. Applejack always grimaced when she passed them during the winter, hoping that they’d return to their full strength. Of course they’ll get better in the spring. Applejack reassured herself. If there’s one thing the Apple Family is known for, it’s its stubborn nature. Her own reassurance didn’t do much to help her though. She still was scared of the worse case scenario. Apples were practically the only thing really keeping the farm together and she couldn’t stop thinking about what they’d do without the fruit. “Um...” Applebloom came to a stop, causing Applejack to bump into her, dropping two of her bags. “What’re those?” Applebloom pointed a hoof at two black forms ahead of them. One was prancing around on two legs, skipping like a little foal who just learned how to walk. It’s eyes glowed a menacing green color, while the other one crawled on all fours, it’s eyes glowing a deep shade of blue a crimson stain or something on its chest. The crimson seemed to have a glow of its own, like it was alive. “What in tarnation?!” Applejack dropped the bags and charged at the one crawling. Before it lifted it’s head, Applejack reared up and bucked as hard as she could. It fell with a loud thud. She then charged at the green eyed one. It raised it’s arms in defence, but Applejack bucked low, in the groin, causing a huff of pain from the being, and making it fall on the ground as well. Applejack looked at the groaning thing, watching it roll over and writhing in pain. Applebloom approached beside her older sister. “What are those things?” “Get, your brother out here,” Applejack told her. “Tell’em t’get my rope too.” Crunches in the snow made Applejack's ears twitch. She paid it no mind, thinking it was just Applebloom's steps to the farm, and keeping her eyes trained on the green-eyed creature groaning on the snow covered ground. The steps came closer, until another black form fell over the fence, gaining Applejack's attention. "Snippy!" It yelled at the unconscious form across from the injured one. "Zat is not how you find Engie!"