//------------------------------// // Oh, brave new world // Story: I am the Gravelord Servant. // by Ssendam the Masked //------------------------------// Hello. My name is Bernard Shaw. I suppose that I'm a nobody. Just your average gamer, trying to make his way through life. Then again, I am slightly above average in height. I stand at six foot tall, and I'm skinny. My hair is rarely cut, and it's scruffy, like a brown mop. Like many guys, I imagine that I'm pretty fit, but most people aren't impressed with my limp arm-noodles. Overall, I'm just your average slacker twenty-year old. I meandered along, smiling at nothing in particular. It was a nice day in Adelaide- no clouds in the sky and sunny. My iPod was playing music in my ears, and I walked with a spring in my step. For the first time in a long while, my face was free of worry and doubt. After all, what use is there in worrying about the future? Nobody in the crowds cared at all. Then, somebody tapped my shoulder. "Hello there." I turned around, to meet this mysterious stranger. "Hmm?" The fellow who had tapped my shoulder was quite tall, about seven feet tall. The man was also quite skinny, skin pulled taught against his skull. Interestingly for the warm weather, he wore a long, black, fake fur coat, that reached almost to the ground. I looked at him. "Good morning." He tilted his head. "Is it? I suppose it would be; however, I feel as if it is too warm." His thin, raspy voice was a bit odd for somebody of his height, but I ignored that; it's rude to point out little things like that. "If you're too hot, then maybe you should take off that huge coat of yours. It would help," I added hastily, as his beetle-black eyes glared into mine like daggers. We stared for a bit, and I broke away first. He tapped his chin with a bony finger, apparently contemplating life. "Well, I'll talk to you later, Bernard." With that, he stalked off on his long legs, disappearing into the throng of the streets. I stared after him, confused. Why on Earth did he talk to me? Well, in any case it didn't rightly matter. I stalked off, replacing my headphones. Still, the question of the stranger buzzed around in my head like a malignant bee. I paused, about to cross the road. Okay, how DID he know my name? Alright, let's have a look at the facts: I do have a Facebook page that I have rarely, if ever, used. Every other piece of my web presence is under the most private settings that I could get. Either that, or I met him before and forgot. Still standing there, I shook my head. Unlikely. He's got a very distinctive face. Plus, I'm not exactly a social butterfly. So... Facebook page is the only possible answer. I felt pleased with that minor bit of deduction, with so little to go on. Still, it wasn't a perfect answer. There were other possibilities, such as him being a stalker or a serial killer. Either way, maybe going to the police station and reporting a possible stalker or serial killer would be the way to go. I stepped out onto the road and kept walking, music blaring in my ears. I could dimly hear people telling me to watch where I was going. Why should I? I turned around, and I saw a car coming at me. The only thing that I could do was stand stock still, body screaming at me to move, but I couldn't, not in the split second before it hit. When it hit me, the first thing I noticed was the pain. There wasn't as much as you'd think. I mean, yes, I could feel my chest collapsing like a plastic bag underfoot, and my stomach being smashed, but overall, it was just above bearable. Another thing is that time itself seemed to go into slow motion, as my body pumped adrenalin through my system. I watched the driver's face go from angry guy to horrified in what felt like an hour. Then, time sped up and I hit the tarmac. The pain flooded me, but because of my crushed organs, I couldn't scream. I wanted to. Oh, I wanted to. The pain was unbearable now, and all I wanted was for it to stop. The cliché blackness rushing in swallowed me. ============-------============== When I awoke again, I felt a lot better. I scrambled up, patting myself down. It was at that point that I realised that I was dead. I turned around, still on the street I died on. The whole street was filled with policemen. "Damn right, bastard ran me over." My face contorted into a snarl. That bloody fuckmuppet was doing seventy in the middle of the city! And I just happened to walk out when he was on his mad rampage of reckless driving! If he didn't get the everliving hell beaten out of him in prison, I was going to haunt him until he did. "It was your own fault, you know." The voice sounded vaguely familiar. I turned around, and fell backwards. Standing there, ten feet tall and peculiar, was the man, only, it seemed as if he was... realer, somehow. I know that 'realer' isn't really a word, but that's all I could think of. His huge black coat now looked like real animal hair. His arms were now bones, yellowing with age. His skull leered at me, at my fear. In his left hand, he carried a huge, curving sword, with a corpse as the handle of the blade. This was a figure that I was intensely familiar with. Gravelord Nito, one of the bearers of the Lord Souls. A boss in Dark Souls, leader of the Gravelord Covenant. Nito, the First of the Dead. He seemed to be amused with my fear. I carefully arranged my face into a neutral expression and bowed. What else does one do when confronted with a god? "Nito. I know that you were the skeletal man from before." He nodded. "That was not a very intelligent observation, but it was good. Still, what a stupid way to die; run over by a car because you didn't notice that it was a green light." I looked at my crushed body, still with a positively stupid look of surprise on its face. "I can't argue with you there. But why did you choose to talk with me? Did you engineer my death?" Gravelord Nito shook his head. "You mortals. Thinking that I would even manipulate your deaths. Why should I even bother; you mortals drive yourselves to death anyway. I had no influence on your death. That was your own fault." I wanted to argue, but it was true. I HAD just walked out into the road like a moron. Gravelord Nito sighed. "In any case, I have an offer for you." I glared at him. "What kind of offer?" He laughed, a dry chuckle that sent shivers down my ethreal spine. "There is a game that is happening; a game that gods have played for millions of years. The Chess Game of the Gods, it is called. Currently, it is set in a world known as Equestria. Know you of it?" I nodded slowly. As well as being a Dark Souls junkie, I was also what I termed a 'casual brony.' Mainly, that meant that I watched the good episodes and avoided the bad like a plague. It was pretty amusing in places, but not someting that I would obsessively watch. "Yes, I know of it. Why are the Gods even playing there?" Nito looked at me. "It is an interesting world. One of the gods there, Discord, started the game." That... was not surprising. But I had another question for him. "Why me? In answer, he chuckled. "Well, for one thing, I chose you because you possess a surprisingly sharp mind for a complete and utter slacker. It's wasted on your chosen profession. For another, you have always joined my covenant, and I always try to look out for my servants.." "Bullshit." He just looked at me. "Fair enough. Plus... I always offer every living creature that dies a chance to work in my domain. So, will you accept?" I didn't know how to respond to that. Sure, I joined his covenant on every playthrough, but that was because the Gravelord Servant Sword looked extremely cool. Speaking of... "Ah, Gravelord, I... I need help with this." Gravelord Nito looked at me. "Speak." I rubbed my hands together; this was going to be a big one. "Alright, let me get a couple of things straight. You said, 'Chess Game of the Gods." This implies that there are other gods out there, with their own pawns marshalling. Correct?" Nito nodded. "Now, THAT was an intelligent observation. Keep talking." "So, if you're all playing this game, then I presume that there is some sort of purpose to it? That's obvious, you don't seem like the type of person who does something for no reason at all." "How very observant of you. So, what are you saying?" I paced. "Now, if there's one thing that I know for sure about gods, assuming that there are pantheons of the classical gods, is that you guys, well, you like to cheat. That's understandable. So, you wouldn't just send me there without an advantage. Hell, even God with a capital G gave away advantages." "You're still missing something important." I rubbed my temples. "What on earth could I be missing? I mean, it's pretty obvious. A 'Chess Game.' Although, if there are 'gods,' plural, then it's really more like a game of shogi or similar. Regardless, I don't even need that much evidence: The Iliad." "What does that have to do with anything?" It all clicked. "Gods get bored, same as us. So... you just, well, play games with mortals. Usually where we kill things for you. This is going to be like Troy, isn't it? People senselessly bashing each other, and just when it seems as if peace might be achieved, then the gods swoop in and kill common sense and logic, and we go at it again!" Nito shook his head, bones rattling. "The gods are not allowed to interfere with the affairs of mortals or other pawns. Only should your mind be invaded will I be allowed to interfere." Now that I knew what the deal was here, I glared into his empty eyesockets. "Knowing that you are sending me there and forcing me to fight for your own amusement and personal benefits, I don't exactly trust you, but I know that there's one thing that you could safely offer me... membership into your covenant. With that, I gain a powerful sword and a Miracle. Can I presume that I am allowed this, by the rules of this game?" "Yes. So you wish to join my covenant? How very intelligent of you; you want every advantage that is mine to give. Very well." He held out a hand, and a very familiar sword appeared in his free hand. It had a curved blade, and appeared to be made with a corpse for a handle. I gripped the hilt reverently. "Bernard Shaw, do you take this blade, and join my covenant? Do you swear to become a Gravelord Servant, and to serve me well? Do you swear to collect the souls of those your blade fells, and offer them as tribute to me?" "I swear." Gravelord Nito grinned; at least, I think he grinned. "Good. Then we have a contract." I felt myself fading. "Fare-thee well, my Servant." For the second time that day, I felt myself fading, fading, fading away... =========-------=========== When I woke up, it was not to the blue sky that I had grown so accustomed to. Instead, it was to the feeling of mud, sucking me down and pulling me under. I pushed myself up, sludge dripping off of my bones as I freed myself from the marsh. Bones... I looked at my hand. Thick bones, pale yellow and caked with grime, already drying on me. I flexed my three fingers and thumb, feeling them move. I was apparently held together by some arcane, incomprehensible force, like magnetism. My face felt longer, and probing it I found a muzzle. How very interesting; I appeared to be a skeletal Diamond Dog. I looked down at my legs- yep, exactly as I expected. I seemed to have slightly better proportions than the average Diamond Dog as well. Experimentally, I poked myself in the eyes, and was rewarded with feeling my fingers enter my empty skull. That was strange. I looked over myself again. You know what, scratch strange, this whole new body was a bad situation. I giggled. I spent about a minute just sitting still, staring at nothing. Then, the muck pulled at me, and I arose to prevent myself from becoming an archaeological discovery. Along the way, I decided to roll about in the mud, for the simple reason that it would camouflage me with the night. After that, I decided to resolve to keep moving. However, something made me pull back. I felt as if I had forgotten something. I looked to my side. Sticking out of the cloying muck, hilt first, was the sword of a Gravelord Servant. I picked it up, feeling the thrum of power flow through me. Had I had muscles, or a face, I would have grinned. As it was, I just let out a dry chuckle. "I thank you, Lord Nito, for this gift of your covenant." I blinked; was that my voice now? This deep baritone? I shrugged; whatever the case, it wasn't a big problem. Now, time to find out where in Equestria I was. Wherever I was, it was probably the Everfree Forest. Some marsh that wasn't shown on the show. You know what's hard about these legs? The backwards joints. Man was not meant to walk with such weird legs. I hate you so much, legs. I spent, like, an hour just standing up and falling down like an idiot on an ice skating rink. Eventually, I learned how to walk. Running comes later. Experimentally, I tried a roll. My strange legs were pretty damn good at helping me roll, though I was afraid of falling apart accidentally. When you're only bones, that's a valid fear. The swamp pulled down on my legbones, trying to suck me in. Even though my sense of touch had been dulled, I could still feel the cool mud ride up through my legbones, and I didn't really care for that. Maybe being dead changes your mindset, as I was pretty surprised how well I was taking this. Then again, when you're hit by a car and a god makes you part of his religion at your own request, you tend to lose your capacity for surprise. I wasn't sure how I would react to killing. After what felt like an hour, I finally made it to something that resembled a town. High wooden stockades greeted me. The ponies up there seemed not to see me, my black muck covered bones almost seamlessly blending in with the night.. Finally, civilisation. I kept my default facial expression. Hopefully, I could slip in. I sat on the firm ground, meditating on what to do. If they reacted like most people do when confronted with a walking skeleton, then I knew that I would die my second death, and there was no point in getting myself killed. I had to press on. I walked back through the nicer area of the forest, away from the cloying mould of the swamp that appealed to me somehow. Maybe the paradox of life causing death was what drew me, an undead being, to the swamp. Regardless, I could see a well-pounded dirt road, and I followed it. Suddenly, I heard a deep, angry roar. I paused. That didn't bode well. Something pounded up behind me. Something big. I rolled out of the way as a gigantic, ethreal orange lion paw the size of a house slammed down on the spot I was just occupying. "Jesus!" I scrambled to my feet, holding my sword in front of me. Standing over me, towering above the trees, was... what was that? The only beast that I knew of that was made of stars was known as an Ursa Major. What was this then? A... Leo Major? In any case, it certainly looked different from the Ursa. There were fine, white stars dotted through it, but it was a dull orange-yellow colour, like the evening sunset. Still, the trees were dwarfed by this beast, and its eyes regarded me with hatred. I turned to run, my skeletal legs pumping as quickly as they could. The first part of Dark Souls law is: don't let them attack you, watch from a distance. The huge lion roared a challenge at me, and quickly charged at me, plowing through trees. This lion was extremely persistent, and what made things worse was the sword I was toting... No. No way am I about to try to fight this thing. Sure, I'm lifting it with one hand with ridiculous ease, but I've never held a sword in my life. Unfortunately, the Leo jumped and sailed in front of me. Alright, time to learn I guess. I hold it with both hands. Right, now what does one do with a swor- "SHIT!" I rolled away from the huge paw. Rolling, at least, was something that I knew how to do. Another dawn-orange paw swing came at me, and I barely dodged. This thing would kill me if given the chance. Come to think of it, any idiot can use the sword. Point the sharp bit into the enemy. With this in mind, I swung my sword at its leg, and was rewarded with it barely grazing. I'd overestimated my reach. I was forced to roll out of the way of another paw swing. Great. Just great. I then charged, ready to hit it with the sharp end. I gripped it in both hands, made a mighty swing... That only went a little way in, then stopped. The Leo seemed a bit annoyed by this little attack. The paw swiped out, and I was knocked backwards. Excellent. This thing was practically invulnerable. My leg bones seemed to have scattered from the impact and it honestly felt as if my legs had been chopped off. I lay on the ground, watching my doom get closer. Slowly; it was enjoying this. My mind started piercing together random-ass facts about lions- I was going to die, and I wanted something to think about until the very end. Lions were prevalent in ancient Greece and Europe, but were killed by kings and similar. The Nemean lion was described as being practically invulnerable to all weapons, but its mouth isn't. Hercules killed the Nemean lion by either strangling it or shooting an arrow into its unguarded mouth. The Nemean lion was commemorated by Zeus by throwing it into the stars, where it became known as the Leo constellation. ... Alright. I have a plan now. The huge beast finally decides to stop toying around with me. In answer, I gripped my sword before me, grimly determined. As it lunged its head towards me, I swung the sword upwards, stabbing it in the head through the mouth. Something vaguely resembling blood came out of the beasts' mouth. The beast struggled, but I stabbed upwards. The beast lay still. I'd killed something as huge as this. I'd killed. I fell backwards and pushed myself away until I was on the opposite side of the clearing. I'd killed a living creature. It was self-defense! Nope, I could have done something else, rather than aggravate that star lion. There was nothing I could do. I would have died. I laughed, a high, hysterical laugh. "I could have been eaten! That's something else! ...Oh god." I tucked myself into a foetal position and started rocking back and forth. If there ever was a moment that disproved the 'Video games make you a killer' theory, then this was it. I made retching sounds in my skeletal throat, as if my body wanted me to throw up. Hello, my Servant. You have done well today. I laughed bitterly."Yeah, I did well. God, I did well." I glared at the bloody sword in my hand. I threw it away. "I killed today. I'm not a warrior, I'm a loser." The huge lion started to turn sable black with a vaguely orange glow still about it, then it slowly... deflated, leaving only the bones and fur behind. You're wrong. You ARE a warrior, you just need some... prodding. I glared at the corpse. "No. A real warrior would have taken their first kill with laughter in his heart." I sounded weird, but I knew those were the right words to choose. That is not a warrior. That's a psychopath. Somebody who kills on a whim, someone who can only, really, kill. A warrior knows when to kill and when not to. Psychopaths never really learn. I paused. "... will it ever get easier? The killing?" My Servant, it always is. You inure yourself to death. But you never forget your first kill. That stays with you. Besides, that wasn't really your first kill. Your first kill of a sentient, living creature, will be. Understand? I nodded mutely, cowed by his gentle voice. Good. With that last, parting statement, Gravelord Nito left. I stared off into the distance, feeling a little spark of resentment for Nito. The God HAD practically killed me, after all. Much as he said that he had no hand in it, I wasn't going to trust his word just yet. I looked at the pelt. So, this was my Quest Reward, eh...? If this thing was based off of the Nemean Lion, then I needed to cut its fur with its own claws. I looked at my absent legs and sighed. Being undead wasn't easy work if I was going to need to reattach my limbs after every fight. I gripped my first limb and got to work reattaching them. The second was a little way off, so I hauled myself over and clicked it into my pelvis. Standing was a bit risky, but I managed it. Thus done, I walked over to the corpse. I gripped a huge claw in a mighty hand, and drew it across the huge beast's fur. It parted with a tearing sound, very easily. Alright, I think that I overestimated its defensive properties. In order to test my hypothesis, I hefted my sword and made a crude swing at the mass of fur. It barely grazed the fur. Huh. Well, better make armour out of it. I gripped the claw again and went back at the fur. Now that I had a fair amount of it torn away from the main mass of black fur, I poked some holes in the fur. I then cut some long, thin strips, and then made what could loosely be called a robe. I slung it over my skeletal shoulders, and tied the straps I'd inexpertly made together to secure the whole assemblage. Now, I looked a little bit less like a walking skeleton, and more like a pile of walking fur with a couple of bones sticking out of it. I chuckled at myself, retrieving my sword. "Lay on, Macduff. Or maybe, I should call myself Lazarus." I rolled the name around. Yes, Lazarus sounds good to me. Lazarus Bane, because why not. As I trooped through the swamp, I felt lost, empty. What is my purpose? The battle was done, and I just felt empty. I fidgeted with my new clothing. I might have killed the Nemean Lion like Hercules, but right now, I felt more like Odysseus, cursed by the gods to never return home for twenty years. How appropriate; I can never return home. I'm a dead man. All I have to hope for is to live a new, fulfilling life. "Halt, vile beast!" I stopped, and, on some base instinct, rolled out of the way of a smashing hammer blow. My new robe might protect me against a blade, but a war hammer was certainly not going to regard my flimsy robe as suitable armour. I didn't want to see what, exactly, would happen were my ribcage crushed. I then turn around to the source of the voice. Standing there, hammer firmly gripped in a white aura, was a unicorn. Heavy set, unusually for a unicorn, and his blue eyes burned with conviction. He wore white armour with gold lining. I could see the black mud adhering to his hooves. Interestingly, he had what looked like a red armband on his left foreleg. My sharp eyes detected RD on it. I wondered what that was an insignia of. "Foul undead, you shall be purged from this world! This I swear, in the name of the Reverent Dawn!" "Wait, hang on a moment. Can't we just talk about this?" For answer, the crazy pony snarled and lunged again with the hammer. I ran away from him. It's a little known fact, but bipeds are better than quadrupeds over short distances, the reason being that quadrupeds have twice as many legs to worry about. It's a good thing that I'm fairly fast, able to keep a distance from him. Unfortunately, I had to roll again as he sent the war hammer flying at me again. Something in my gut told me that his hammer would kill me if I gave it the chance to. "Look, buddy, I've killed once today, I don't want to fight you. Just leave me alone, you douchebag!" Unfortunately, the madpony didn't seem to listen to reason. Instead, he roared, trying to get at me again. I was forced to fight back. I gripped my sword, and charged forwards, sword prepared for a mighty swing. He saw that and grinned, focusing his horn. I note, out of the corner of my eye, that his hammer has rested on the ground, no longer supported by his aura. Whatever the case, the blade cleaved widely, but it was stopped by some sort of white bubble that completely surrounded him, like a personal version of Twilight's building shield. I noticed his horn glowing, and he smirked. "Hah! Surprised? Nothing of your ilk can get past that- GET BACK HERE!" While he ran his mouth, I ran for the hills, intent on escape. Honestly, this guy is arrogant to the extrem- The hammer swung at me at almost twice the speed as before. I barely dodged it. He's pissed; spittle froths and foams from his mouth, and his eyes were bloodshot. He was more like a wild animal or a beserker than a paladin now- and he won't be reasoned with. I look at my sword. I was probably going to... Hang on. He could only shield himself consciously, right? That spell required conscious effort, and a lot of magic to use. So, if there's an attack that he doesn't know about... And I should have this one, I'm a member of the Covenant. I stabbed the ground on instinct. Gravelord Sword dance! I focus on summoning one, long, thin blade, not wanting to waste my sole Miracle. He's impaled from beneath by a long, red blade. I withdraw my sword, and the blade vanishes. Mortified, I sinkto the ground, then spring to action. I gripped a piece of fur from my robe and I ran over- He blasted at me, a white beam that barely grazed me, but my arm catches on fire. I screamed and plunged my hand into the cool, cool mud, feeling the burn from what's obviously holy magic. He tried to levitate his hammer again but slumped, pain dulling his power. I could tell that he's close to death, and I gagged out of shock. I caused this. My arm was still burning underneath the mud. When it stopped, I pulled it out of the cooling mud. There's a thin groove running along my right forearm; I gingerly tapped it. I then turned around and spoke to him. "I figured that little shield trick required conscious thought. Can't block what you don't know. You're some kind of paladin, aren't you?" It's all I can do to keep my voice from shaking. For an answer, the paladin glares at me. "Creature... you have no idea what you're messing with. Celestia will find you... she'll kill you." I glare at him. "That doesn't really sound like Celestia at all." I was still confused about something, though. "You... why did you fight me? Why?" He sneered at me. "It doesn't matter... if I die here... the Revenant Dawn... will cleanse the world of your filth... you unclean undead beasts-" He collapsed again, bleeding profusely, and I gripped my scrap of fur again and tried to help him, but another blast nearly took my head off. "GET AWAY FROM ME! FILTH! SCUM! I AM STALWORT HOOF, AND I SHALL-urk!" With that, he takes his last breath. I looked at him and sagged down to my knees. My sword arm came up, almost mechanically. I then impaled him in the head, making absolutely sure. "I tribute your soul to Gravelord Nito, first of the dead." The words tumbled through my jaws without any emotion or real thought. I then collapsed, and just... Shut down. The Darkness takes me.