A Journey through Memories

by Centauri


Chapter Twelve - Moving On

A Journey through Memories


Chapter Twelve - Moving On

I stood at the base of the guards’ barracks in Cadmos. They were holding a funeral for the eight ponies they had recovered the day before; it was customary to respect the dead, even if they remained unknown. I had stayed a few more hours for the burial, along with the six mares I journeyed with and Dietrich. He did not cry during this funeral, he simply gazed at the graves, lost in thought. Not many ponies attended the funeral: by tradition, the guards who were involved with moving or finding the bodies attended, but seldom any visitors. It was normal for the priest to invite anypony to speak for the dead, but, as the guards often did not know the dead, it was more of a formality. It came to this point in the service and Dietrich stepped up.
“These ponies were once my friends,” he began. “But for various religions’ sake, I daren’t name them.” I doubted this was true, but conceded his reasoning. “I knew them well, and I’m sad to see them pass on. I pay my respects for the dead: not to do so would insult their dignity. They fought for what they believed in, part of the minority who felt so strongly that they should step up.
“Some would want me dead for saying this, but I care not: these ponies were my friends and colleagues, and I am proud of what they did for what they believe in. I am proud to name them as my friends.” He stepped down; the guards looked as if they should stop him, but funerals are one place in Equestrian culture where one can speak their mind in respect for the dead without incurring the wrath of the Guard. The priest looked stunned and curious as to what the deceased ponies could do that was so bad that it would cause the death of another. He did, however, continue the service.
It was not long before the service finished, and we walked away from the barracks while the guards lowered the eight coffins into their respective graves. As we walked away from the barracks, Dietrich spoke up. “Do you mind if I travel with you?” He asked. I didn’t reply. “There are going to be bandits on the road north, and don’t deny that that’s the way you’re going.” I sighed.
“Okay, Dietrich,” I told him. “On one condition: change your cloak back. Oh, by all means keep it protective; simply make sure you are seen as yourself.” He nodded and pulled out his cloak, lighting up his horn to banish some of the enchantments on it. I moved close to Twilight and talked to her in a whisper.
“Are you okay, dear?” I asked. She seemed distant from me since the night before. Either she was sulking, or something was troubling her.
“Hmm?” She seemed to break out of a reverie. “Oh, yeah; I’m fine.” So she’s sulking, I thought, but I didn’t say anything for fear of offending her. I borrowed her atlas and looked at the close map around Cadmos. We would be taking the north-bearing road towards the tropical forests, and then we would follow a track to the northeast, towards the Daydream Outpost. Dietrich finished his disenchanting, and we started walking towards the city gates at around mid-afternoon.
As we neared the wooden constructs built into the palisade, I saw a guard talking sternly to two colts who were trying to enter the city with a canvas wagon in tow. I walked up to the guard.
“Is there a problem here?” I asked pleasantly. The guard turned, and saluted. “And before you speak, please call me Luna.”
The guard nodded. “I’ve got a feeling that these two gentlecolts are bandits, yo- Luna. I checked a list of all outgoing wagons and this fits a description of one which left a week ago. I just need to verify that this isn’t the same wagon, then they can go on their way; the trouble is, they won’t let me.”
I turned towards the two colts, who suddenly looked quite uneasy. “Look at me. Are you bandits? And think very carefully before you answer me.” Neither of the colts answered. “Guard, check the inventory of the wagon.” He saluted once more. The colts looked as if they were about to protest, but they closed their mouths without speaking.
“It matches,” the guard called from behind the wagon. The two colts hung their heads and sighed. I looked of them.
“What of the merchant who drove this?” I asked them, worried. They did not answer for a long while. “Answer me!” This shocked one of the colts into answering.
“Dead,” the red colt on the left said, simply. I swore under my breath, and I barely restrained myself from bucking the one who spoke. After a deep breath, I continued, trying to stay calm.
“Are you sure?” I asked simply, quietly. I prayed that there would be a chance I could save the merchant’s life.
“We beat them,” the other colt said. I sighed; many may have died. “That was two days ago. They probably froze since then, and even if you get there tomorrow, I don’t like your chances.” I hated to admit it, but neither did I.
“Guard,” I called the stallion. “Take these two to court.” At these words, I turned to the colts. “Plead guilty. It’s the only chance you may have to get out of prison before forty years have passed.” I walked away from the group and heard the guard give the colts their rights. I looked at the six mares and stallion now in front of me. They had not heard the exchange.
“Follow the road north; I shall see you there,” I told them. “Dietrich: do whatever is in your power to protect them should the need arise. Understood?” He nodded grimly. “I’m sorry, everypony, but I have to do this.”I glanced at Twilight. She stared stonily ahead. I hoped she would understand in due course, but I didn’t have time to explain now.
I turned and ran through the gates. As soon as I was clear of the city, I spread my wings. I had a fifteen hoof wingspan which helped greatly on long distance flights such as this. I picked up my altitude, trying to fly high enough that I would not attract attention from unwanted eyes, but low enough to see the detail of the road. I picked up speed, and soon my wings were burning with the exertion of flying at such speeds. I panted as I watched the ground move below me. Two days on hoof, I calculated mentally. That’ll take me about three hours to fly, maybe two.
I saw a group of ponies travelling south, towards Cadmos, and I prayed that they were benign. I could not stop, however, so I kept flying.
Eventually, I saw a group of ponies who were not moving on the side of the road. Realising that this group was my quarry, I dove to the road. I nearly threw up at what I saw there: it was a middle-aged unicorn family, two adults and a colt barely out of foalhood. I grimly went about my work, checking which of them was still alive. I listened to the stallion’s mouth. No breath came out. I checked his pulse with my muzzle. No response. I sighed and closed his eyes with my hoof. I moved along to the mare. She had also died; however, probably at least early this morning. As I was closing her eyes, I heard a hoarse whisper behind me.
“Bastards.” I turned to see the young unicorn colt looking at me. His face was bruised, and it looked as if one of his forelegs was broken. He coughed, and I saw flecks of blood fly from his mouth. “They killed my parents.”
“They were caught at Cadmos,” I tried to console him. He only looked at me, a complex array of emotions over his face. “What’s your name?”
“Jesse,” he replied, trying to stay strong.
“And what was your family doing on this road, Jesse?” I asked, trying to distract him from his nigh-inevitable death.
“Moving away from Cadmos,” Jesse said. He tried to continue, but he started coughing violently. I lit up my horn and siphoned off some of his pain into my body. He relaxed slightly. “Thanks. We were heading towards a village near the Daydream Outpost; it’s good business around there, being a major seaport.
“Life in Cadmos was getting difficult for us; nopony was visiting given the bandit situation. As you can guess, I’m aware of it.” He chuckled lightly, and gave a slight gasp at the pain in his ribs. I guessed that he was ready to move on if that was nature’s call, given his dry sense of humour. “So dad decided to cut our losses and take mum and me north. We got to here, and then these two colts stopped us. Wanted our stuff. Dad said no and they hit him. They didn’t care if we died.” Jesse looked to his parents next to him. “And look where it got us.” He waited, probably looking back on his life; I didn’t know. “I tried to keep myself alive. I was always better at magic than mum and dad. I kept myself warm, b- but I couldn’t do the same for them. They would’ve hated me for doing that, and I loved them. I couldn’t let them watch me die.”
I knew what he was thinking: I had seen parents who had lost a child, and they gladly would have changed roles. But nature didn’t let that happen.
I made up my mind: I lit up my horn once more and tried entering Jesse’s mind. He was, however, a unicorn, and they held natural mind defences.
“Let me in,” I commanded. “I can still save your life.”
“No.” Jesse looked at me sternly. “I have no idea when I’m going to die – oh, I know I will – and if you’re in my mind when that happens, you probably won’t survive. There’s nothing you can do which will change my mind.”
I sighed. I guess I couldn’t save his life, after all. “If you can do two things for me, though, as a dying colt’s request?” I looked at him.
“Yes?” I prompted.
“Bury us,” he told me, almost a command. “The dead are to be respected, and I will hold you to that even after the end for me, your majesty.”
I didn’t even bother correcting him. “And the next thing?”
Jesse hesitated. “Don’t let me... don’t let me die a- alone.”
I nodded. “I won’t, Jesse.” I sat by his side and offered him my hoof. He took mine in his and closed his eyes. Soon, he slept, and dreamed his final dream.
It was nightfall when Jesse’s breathing finally stopped. I let my tears flow freely then; I simply couldn’t hold them back. I held true to my promise, however, and dug a grave for the three unicorns who had died before their time. As I covered their bodies up once more, I conjured a marble grave from the world around my and carved an epitaph upon it. It was simple, but I did one more thing for Jesse: I was going to let him be remembered.

Here lies the family of Jesse,
Three of many, with cruel chance thrown against them. Let their memories help others in their struggle, knowing that they held through to the end.
Rest in peace, dear friends.

I secured the grave firmly to the ground: many bandits would want to have that quality stone in their possession. I looked one last time upon the grave, tears rolling down my face. I finally turned away from them and flew back south along the road. Even when I was in the air, tears were flowing down my face.
I saw a group of ponies sleeping next to the road. I couldn’t see what colours they were, so I drew closer until I recognised the strong build of Dietrich, the largest of the ponies there. I alighted just outside the camp and I slumped where I was sobbing.
I had just lost a good pony. He was just a kid, barely a colt by any stretch of the imagination; I cried all the harder as I remembered this fact. I heard a hasty trot nearing me. I didn’t care who it was. I just wanted to forget the past four hours.
“It’s okay, Luna,” I was not expecting to hear Dietrich’s voice, and I looked up. “They don’t need to worry anymore. Worry, pain, fear; it’s all behind them now. It will get better.” Eventually, my sobs subsided. I still felt terrible, however. Then it occurred to me that I hadn’t told anypony where I was going.
“How did you know what happened?” I asked him. He smiled briefly.
“I didn’t. I saw the two colts being led away and the wagon left where it was. I guessed that they were bandits or thieves, otherwise the Guard would be obliged to move the wagon to their property,” he said, with surprising accuracy. My mind wandered and I wondered what he had been before an assassin.
I bade Dietrich go back to sleep. I, myself, waited for a few minutes, and then slowly walked over to Twilight. She was shivering, and sleeping restlessly because of this. I lay down beside her and draped my wing over her. She stirred and woke momentarily.
“Go back to sleep, dear,” I told her, and soon we were both sleeping, the world revolving around us. Ponies lived; ponies died.
So why had Jesse’s passing affected me so much? I may never know.
* * *
I woke up without Twilight under my wing. I glanced up and around the camp, only to find that I had slept in; it was at least midmorning now. I leapt to my feet and apologised profusely to Rainbow Dash, who I could see was itching to keep going. Judging that I didn’t need breakfast – I was an alicorn, after all – I called out to the others.
“Are we all ready to go?” There were a few, half-hearted murmurs of agreement and we started walking. It was after we were walking for an hour that I realised that I needed something to eat. I levitated an apple out of my saddlebags and proceeded to munch on it thoughtfully as I walked. I had buried away the pain I felt when I thought about Jesse, and managed a good conversation with Fluttershy about the herbs which she used to cure her animals’ ailments. It was an uneventful journey, although Dietrich seemed quick to jump at anything which might be a threat, thinking that there were bandits hiding in every nook or cranny.
We stopped for lunch; it was quickly getting warmer as we progressed northwards, and Celestia’s light seemed to be scorching at high sun. We each retrieved some apples from our saddlebags and started eating. There was a quiet conversation between Rainbow Dash and Twilight, but I decided to leave it be; Twilight still seemed to be sulking around me. I sighed: I hoped she would come around soon. I was missing her company, and wanted to have a quiet conversation with her without any of the others listening in.
We continued walking along the road, and we eventually saw a wagon following the road down towards Cadmos. The atmosphere quickly grew tense, and Dietrich took it upon himself to protect us.
“Ho, there, strangers!” He called out to the wagon, whose atmosphere seemed equally as tense as our own. The wagon slowed and eventually halted.
“Who calls?” They inquired. I guessed that it was common for such exchanges to take place in this hazardous road.
“My name is Dietrich, and seven friends of mine travel with me,” shouted the brown stallion towards the wagon. The wagon had still not moved. “We are journeying towards Ennisfall, where we are going to seek out the family of one of our own.”
The leader of the wagon paused for a second before answering. “Are you carrying any weapons? We must assure our own safety.”
Dietrich nodded. “I understand, comrade, but I feel uncomfortable answering you question. After all, you may be the bandits.”
“Granted,” the leader of the wagon conceded. “We shall pass. Stay where you are, if you please.” Dietrich acknowledged the request and the wagon slowly trundled forwards. As they passed, I saw glares of suspicion from the wagon team, and I guessed that some in the back were holding weapons for fear of their own lives. I watched them move on, and soon we were about our own way, continuing along the road to the north.
* * *
It came to about an hour before sundown before we made camp. We mutually agreed that journeying at any time near dark on this road would be a very bad idea, probably leading to one of us being hurt, badly. With the little sunlight we had left, Dietrich started practicing some of the hoof combat I had seen him use in the dream I watched. Applejack was watching with curiosity; Rainbow Dash was simply gazing at Dietrich. I smiled, slightly bemused, and then my heart dropped. I really hope that I haven’t been that obvious, I prayed, but I realised I could do nothing about it if I had. It was not long before Dietrich caught Applejack’s stare and invited her to learn. Rainbow Dash, refusing to be outmatched by Applejack, joined her, and they started practicing. It was incredibly amusing at first; neither Applejack nor Rainbow Dash could stand up on their hind legs for more than a second. After Dash finally managed to stay on her feet for five seconds, Dietrich walked over and pushed her lightly in the chest. Rainbow Dash fell over and complained playfully about how unfair Dietrich was being.
“You’ll have to handle more than a light shove, in these parts, Rainbow Dash, if you want to stay alive,” Dietrich told her. “You’ll need to move your feet to be a bit wider than they were before. Helps you balance.” He moved to Applejack and gave similar criticism to her.
I looked away from the group, glancing at our surroundings. As my eyes wandered over the road and the mountainous forest around it, I saw a familiar copse of trees. I silently stood and walked towards it. As I neared the corner of the cliff, I felt a drop in my chest. There was the marble slab, marking the grave of three ponies whom I barely knew. I stood by the grave, but this time I did not shed tears. I simply stood there, devoid of emotion. Equestria could use me, this time, I thought. I am not going to make the same mistakes as last time; I’ll fix what was broken in my absence. There were no roads with bandits when I ruled with Celly, and it will return that way once again. As I made this vow within myself, I heard the thud of a pony’s hooves on the spruce needles behind me. I turned to see Twilight, simply walked beside me and read the epitaph I had engraved on the stone.
“So...” Twilight began. “This is why you left in such a hurry?” I simply nodded; she stayed silent for a while longer. “Please, come with me,” she requested of me. I followed her deeper into the forest. As we reached a small clearing, she turned and wrapped her forelegs around me. I was slightly stunned at the contact; she had been sulking over me the past few days. I returned the gesture, glad to see that Twilight was able to trust me again.
“You cared enough to chase after a single pony,” she began. “You didn’t even know if they were alive any more, but that didn’t stop you. You cared enough for a group of strangers that you gave them a gift many were denied: you let them be remembered. You cared for them so much, so you went to such great lengths as to that.” She motioned back towards the grave. “You cared for each of them. And that... that’s why I love you.” At this, Twilight hesitated. I gave her a curious look, wondering what she was about to do.
Twilight, still embracing me, leaned forwards and pressed her lips against my own. Realising what she was doing, I pressed against her in turn. I wanted to lose myself in the moment. I could feel the warmth of her body against mine; her breath, flaring out of her nostrils; her heart, beating erratically against my chest. I never wanted this moment to end, just me and my beloved, alone in a forest. I closed my eyes and simply let myself enjoy the many sensations coursing through my body at that moment.
A feeling of contentment flowed within me, engulfing my entire being, until a not entirely unwelcome thought crossed my mind. I let Twilight go, both of us panting, out of breath. “Follow me,” I told Twilight. “There’s something I ought to show you.” Puzzled but seemingly playful after our kiss, Twilight giggled and nodded. I turned and started galloping up the slope. I knew I wasn’t exerting myself, but I worried for Twilight; I cast my mind out behind me and fed her some of my energy. She graciously accepted it and galloped all the faster to catch up with me.
It was not long before I stood on a high cliff, overlooking the forest around the base of the cliff, admiring the beauty of the trees and lakes around me. Twilight caught up with me promptly. “This may take a few minutes,” I warned her. “But it is going to be worth it.” I smiled and turned towards the east. Spreading my wings, I prepared a piece of my alicorn magic which had been left unused for a thousand years. Reaching out, I felt the presence of a silver orb, hanging below the horizon of the world. I took a firm hold of it, and waited; I knew I had to try and clear my mind of Twilight, because Celly and I could literally see into each other’s thoughts if we were both holding the sun or the moon.
I felt another presence firmly grasp the moon. It nearly lost its hold as it recognised another consciousness there. Luna, Celly thought. What in Equestria are you doing here? I hoped that my self-discipline had paid off as I answered her.
Hi, Celly. Nice to see you here, too. I remarked, dryly. Celly was always the more... immature of us, but it was often a close match, and I was winning at this point.
Well... yes; you, too, Celly thought. I could tell easily that she was flustered as to why I was doing this. But my point stands: why are you here?
My body, on the heights of the cliff range, felt a gentle nuzzle on its neck. Oh, horseapples, I thought, as my as-of-yet impenetrable self-discipline finally broke. I could feel the memories flowing through me and into Celestia: memories of disappointment, joy, fear, worry, happiness and finally euphoria. At the centre of it all was a young lavender mare, well known to both myself and my sister.
Oh... I- I don’t thi- Celly was stammering enough to rival Fluttershy. I really must have flustered her, and I wasn’t sure how she would take it; she felt a very strong maternal love towards Twilight, often treating her as she would have her own child. Eventually, Celestia managed to straighten out her thoughts. Look: I know that you can’t do anything about it at this stage; but for goodness’ sake, take care of her. Make sure you’re both happy, because if you make a mistake, you’re going to have to live with it for a very long time.
I mentally shrugged. I think we’re both pretty adamant on this, Celly. Now, I’m going to raise this moon. Celly graciously stepped back, but stayed there in case I had any trouble. It was, after all, the first time I had done this in over one thousand years. I pulled with a great heave of mental strength; raising the moon was a lot like exercise: the more I did in the future, the easier it would become. I soon felt that the moon was over the horizon and it would continue along its path throughout the rest of the night independently of either Celestia or me.
I opened my eyes to see the forest below me lit by a silver glow in the sky. I just raised the moon, I found the concept a bit difficult to get my head around, but there it was, in front of me. I turned away from the cliff edge: I was feeling slightly dizzy after the mental exertion. I leaned slightly against Twilight for balance as she stared into the sky with awe. She nuzzled me affectionately and we started down the slope, back into the forest. I let her take herself to the camp while I collected some fungi which we could eat for dinner that night. I soon found some edible mushrooms and trotted back to camp. When I arrived, I saw Twilight in a conversation with Fluttershy, and Dietrich was still teaching Applejack and Rainbow Dash the hoof combat. Applejack was falling over occasionally, but Rainbow Dash had to use her wings to steady herself on two hooves, much to Dietrich’s chastisement.
“Keep your wings against your back,” he scolded her. “They’ll just slow you down, and – such as I know of pegasus biology – if somepony hits you in the wing, it hurts.” Dash succeeded in keeping her wings in, but was now falling over much more than Applejack, to the latter’s amusement. There was friendly competition between the two mares, and they had so much in common, that I thought that that particular friendship could last as long as they lived.
I gave the mushrooms I had collected to Rarity and soon the smell of cooking wafted throughout the camp. Soon, bowls were handed out and we enjoyed a meal which few could have rivalled with a proper kitchen.
“Wow,” I stated as I finished my first mouthful. “Where did you learn to cook, Rarity? Canterlot Castle could use a chef like you.” I was joking, but Rarity nonetheless blushed.
“Oh...” she stammered. “Here and there, just... you know... experience.” I wondered if she was flustered by being complimented by a princess, and, after a short time, figured that it was probably the case. Everypony in the clearing was content and wanted rest. I knew that one in our number was going to have a lot of trouble sleeping. I lay down on the pine needles and let my cloak cover me. Twilight lay down a few metres away, having drawn the same conclusions as me: Dietrich was unlikely to sleep tonight, given what he had been through during the past week.
* * *
I woke up early the next morning, before dawn, and I walked around the camp. I looked over the ponies in the camp: Pinkie Pie was twitching in her sleep, Applejack was as still as a log, Rarity was mumbling quietly, but otherwise peaceful; Rainbow Dash and Dietrich were lying next to each other, their hooves touching; Fluttershy stirred, but did not wake; and Twilight was snoring softly.
I looked once again at Rainbow Dash and Dietrich. What could she see in him? I daresay that she doubted he was a killer, but I guessed I could do nothing about it, only hope for the best. This was not a bright prospect: Rainbow Dash was immortal, and Dietrich would inevitably die. I wasn’t sure Rainbow Dash would handle it well, take it in her stride; or if she would decide to end it for herself, causing the rest of us great grief and pain. I knew little on the subject, but I hoped it would be somewhere between the two; otherwise, she would never learn from her mistakes.
Applejack soon woke, followed closely by Pinkie Pie, who proceeded to bounce around the camp. As Pinkie bounced past him, Dietrich woke with a start. “I really wish she’d stop doing that,” he muttered, but softly enough that Pinkie couldn’t hear. “What’s for breakfast?” He asked so everyone could hear.
Pinkie Pie was the first to answer. “We’ve got apples,” she replied, happily, and proceeded to munch on one from her saddlebags.
“I was hoping nopony was going to say that,” he groaned quietly, and I was forced to agree: it was arduous having apples for the better part of our diets. Only Pinkie Pie could find enthusiasm in the mundane, a gift which I envied her of.
* * *
We walked for another ten days. I guessed that we had that again and more to go before we reached our next stop. The pine needles were bitter, arguably worse than the apples, and the fungi Rarity normally cooked were getting scarce and extremely difficult to find. Twilight and I were growing closer, and many nights were spent in each other’s company, sometimes kissing, but mostly enjoying a conversation about many different subjects. I noticed that Rainbow Dash and Dietrich were both spending a lot more time together, but I had not found the resolve to talk to Dash yet. Despite the food we had to endure, the forest offered sights which few in Equestria could rival: cliffs topped by spruce and pine trees and sometimes passing by sparkling blue lakes in valleys or ravines between the cliffs and slopes.
Dietrich was walking alone at the head of our convoy, while I was holding a largely one-sided conversation with Pinkie Pie, which involved me asking a question, and then waiting out the next five minutes before I changed the subject. Somehow, she always seemed to relate any subject I might have to parties.
We were walking along the road, a lake on our left, and a jagged cliff about twenty yards away on the right. Pinkie Pie was talking about candy (consistently one step away from parties), when I felt a niggling at the edge of my consciousness. I bade Pinkie to be quiet momentarily as I tried to identify the feeling in my head. I confronted it, but it constantly evaded me. Something was wrong.
“Dietrich...” I called, wanting to warn him about my feelings. He didn’t even have time to turn.
A crossbow bolt shattered against the side of Dietrich’s head.