Appledashery

by Just Essay


Birds of a Feather

“Dashie, you like shells, don’tcha?”

Rainbow Dash did a double-take from where she hovered above a park bench in the sunlight. “The hay is that supposed to mean?”

Pinkie Pie waved a pair of pale shapes in her hooves. “Sea shells! They sound like a herd of infant foals when you clap them like so!” She slapped the hollow pieces in rapid succession across the cobblestone path cutting through the park. “Heehee! It’s like a stampede of adoracute!”

“Pinkie, darling, where did you find the time to collect sea shells?” Rarity took a sip from a cup of tea and levitated it back onto the hoofrest of the park bench where she sat beside Twilight. “Come to think of it, we’re a long ways from any large ocean…”

“Hmmm…” Twilight smiled as she turned a page of the book she was reading on the edge of the bench. “That’s a good point. Ponyville is the second most centralized village in the Equestrian homeland.”

“Nah, I just picked these out from in front of Filthy Rich’s house.”

“P-Pinkie!” Rarity blanched, nearly knocking her teacup to the ground. “Those sea shells were supposed to be there! Why… th-that’s the gentlecolt’s driveway!”

Rainbow Dash giggled breathily.

Twilight Sparkle glanced up from her book. “Something funny, Rainbow?”

“Ohhhhhhhhhh maybe…” Rainbow glanced at Pinkie. “Just how many of those shells did you grab, Pinkie?”

“Oh, I dunno.” Pinkie held up a large blue sand bucket. “About four or five…” She blushed. “...of these babies.”

“Unh!” Rarity gasped. “Filthy Rich is an important stallion! How will he help Ponyville’s economy if he can’t even focus on bringing his stagecoach in from a long drive?!”

“Seriously, Rarity.” Twilight smirked. “You worry about the stallions of this town a little too much.”

“Well, somepony has to!” Twilight tilted her nose up. “There’s so few of them, relatively speaking. I swear, it’s like they’re a precious, dying breed!”

“Heh…” Rainbow yawned. “...precious my blue flank.”

“Hmm?” Rarity glanced up.

“Ermmm--Uhhh!” Rainbow smiled nervously. “Pinkie sure can bake a cake!”

“And how!” Pinkie flung the shells around in her hooves and made engine noises, pretending they were dogfighting zeppelins.

“Rainbow, darling, this is supposed to be a casual outing.” Rarity smiled. “Relax, dear.” She patted the bench between herself and Twilight. “Have yourself a sit. You must be working a sweat like that.”

“Believe me, I’m A-okay,” Rainbow Dash said.

“Are you sure of that?” Rarity squinted. “You’re awfully fond of exercising those wings of yours nonstop when you’re around us. It seems dreadfully tiring.”

“Oh, it’s the opposite, believe me.” Rainbow Dash gulped, feeling the edges of her front hooves tingle as she hung the numb things behind her. “I c-couldn’t be any more chillaxed! Really!”

“I wouldn’t bother her much about it, Rarity,” Twilight said. She flipped a page and smiled as she thought aloud, “Pegasi are just natural at constant, uninterrupted flight. I’m willing to bet that it’s a great deal more comfortable than standing on their own four legs.”

“Uh… yeah!” Rainbow nodded. “What she said.”

“Still, the resilience of a pegasus’ natural wings are absolutely incredible.” Twilight leaned her chin against her muzzle and smirked. “I’ve always wanted to study a pair of them up close.”

“Yeah, well, too bad you’re never going to have wings of your own, Twilight.”

“Well… maybe I could--”

“I ain’t gonna be no guinea pig!” Rainbow frowned, folding her forelimbs.

“Yeah, Twilight!” Pinkie frowned. “Leave her ginnies and her pigs alone!”

Twilight giggled. “I wasn’t going to dissect her or anything!”

“Ew!” Rainbow shivered. “You actually do that to animals?”

Twilight blinked. “Not while they’re alive.”

“You would smell most rank with formaldehyde, Rainbow,” Rarity uttered, finishing the last of her tea. “It begs being said.”

“Well, nopony asked you too.”

“Good thing Fluttershy’s not listening to this conversation,” Twilight muttered. “Where is she, anyways? I mean, I know Applejack’s busy with the apple buck season and all…”

“Ohhh…” Pinkie fiddled with her bucket of shells and shrugged with an errant smirk. “She’s probably out and about, frolicking with Big Mac.”

Twilight blinked. “Big Mac?”

“Oh, isn’t it just divine?” Rarity cooed, waving a hoof. “They do make such a glorious match! Both are such tender-hearted, sweet-natured ponies! So quiet and bashful--yet so perfect for one another!” She batted her eyelashes. “One’s meek and frail, the other strong and dependable. It’s heavenly, I tell you!”

“Really?” Twilight blinked in surprise. “Fluttershy and Big Mac…?”

“Come on, Twilight.” Rainbow Dash smirked. “You’ve got your nose stuck waaaaaaaaay too deep in that book of yours.”

“I… I-I just thought that they were close acquaintances,” Twilight said with a shrug. “I mean, I’ve got nothing against it. Big Mac is Applejack’s sister. He’s almost family to Fluttershy and the rest of us as it is.”

“Ew… dang it…” Rainbow Dash made to wretch. “Don’t put it like that, egghead!”

“Yeah!” Pinkie snickered. “Besides, it’s a lot bouncier than that!”

“Bouncier?” Twilight blinked.

“One’s an innie and the other’s an outtie.” Rarity winked. “As t’were.”

“Snkkkt--Heeheehee!” Rainbow Dash hugged herself from where she hovered. “Rarity, knock it off. This is Fluttershy we’re talking about.”

“And I applaud her. Seriously, I do.”

Twilight blinked yet again. “I don’t get it…”

“Oooh! Oooh!” Pinkie stood up suddenly, a stray hair bouncing out of place over her brow. “That’s a doozie! Make it three doozies!”

“Huh?” Twilight looked up.

“Pinkie Sense,” Rainbow explained. “Foals are nearby.”

“Make that cute foals!” Pinkie frowned, then winked. “You don’t want to know where the hair flounces for when ugly kids show up.”

“Unnngh…” Twilight sighed into her book. “I swear--I’m a big bag of clueless today.”

“Happens to the best of us, darling.” Rarity sat up in the middle of her bench and waved a hoof. “Sweetie Belllllle! Yooohooo! How fares you, darling?”

“Hey Rarity!” Sweetie’s voice squeaked over the rise of the hill. She jostled in the red wagon beside Apple Bloom. “Ungh! Owie!”

“Scootaloo!” Apple Bloom barked. “Slow down, will ya?! Sweetie Belle wants to say ‘howdy’ to her big sister!”

“Whoops!” I winced, swiveling the scooter hard to the side so that it braked against the path with a slight screech. The wagon jostled towards me, but I lifted my hoof and stopped it before my friends could crash into me. “H-hey! Uhm... Points for style, huh?”

“Scootaloo, darling, please don’t kill Sweetie Belle on that thing,” Rarity calmly chided. “She just finished with a most terrifying brush with death as it is.”

“Sis!” Sweetie Belle pouted, cheeks turning red. “I did not!”

“The pony pox is nothing to laugh at!” Rarity said. “Tell me--have you been taking your medicine?”

“Yesssss, Rarity.” Sweetie groaned. “Once after waking, and a second time at lunch.”

“There’s a good girl. You’ve got another week of three tablespoons a day.”

“Awww--But Rarity--”

“No buts! I’m to see to it that you get better from your recent plight! After all…” Rarity smirked. “You have me to thank for becoming healthy enough for your outdoor excursions, yes?”

“Yer lucky…” Apple Bloom glanced over her shoulder. “I had the pony pox for a whole week. I was so dag-blame’d sick, Applejack says I started ramblin’ about these scary lookin’ shadows stalkin’ me from the corners of the room.”

“Eyugh… please don’t get me started on the pony pox,” I said, rolling my eyes. “My Aunt treated me like I was a princess.”

“Jee…” Sweetie Belle shifted where she stood. “How… erm… awful, Scootaloo.”

“I know, right? I swear, if my next door neighbors said one more ‘princess and the pea’ joke--” I turned, then gasped at the blue sight above me. “Whoah! H-hey there, Rainbow Dash!”

“Hey-ya, kiddo.”

I grinned, my tiny wings fluttering. “I didn’t know you hung out the park!”

“Err… yeah…” Rainbow’s face scrunched up as her body sagged a bit in midair. “It’s… kind of weird, huh?”

“Hey, everypony’s gotta rest from practicing a show that’ll dazzle the Wonderbolts, huh?” I chirped.

“Hmmmm…” Rarity stifled a giggled as she smiled warmly my way. “That’s certainly what Rainbow is good at these days--being dazzling.”

Rainbow glared aside, muttering in a voice she must have presumed I couldn’t hear: “Watch it, vampire.”

Hisssssssss,” Rarity playfully returned.

“It’s nice meetin’ y’all n’stuff, but we’ve got some important crusadin’ to do!” Apple Bloom spoke up, rocking the wagon behind me.

“Oh?” Twilight blinked at us. “Not doing anything too adventurous, I hope!”

“We’re gonna earn a cutie mark in lizard-catching!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed.

“Sweetie Belle, darling, you shriek at the sight of lizards.” Rarity stared quietly, then pointed at herself. “I shriek at the sight of lizards!”

“Right! So I’ve got just the solution!” Sweetie Belle reached into the back of the wagon, grabbed a frilly pink sleeping mask, and slapped it over her eyes. Blinded, she smiled and spread her forelimbs. “Tadaaaaaa…”

Apple Bloom’s lips mouthed, ”It was her idea.

“Wait…” Rarity’s muzzle fell agape. She pointed a pale hoof forward. “Is that my…?”

Whoops!” I strapped my helmet on tighter and flapped my wings. “Gotta go!” The three of us zoomed past Pinkie’s cheering figure. I threw a shout over my shoulder. “Nice talking to you! Enjoy the rest of your day!”

“Hmmm…” Twilight smiled. “She’s polite, that Scootaloo.”

“Is she?” Rainbow Dash cleared her throat. “I didn’t notice.”

“If you don’t mind my asking, Rarity, just how did Sweetie Belle get over the pony pox so swiftly?” Twilight asked. “You seemed awfully distraught about the situation a few days ago.”

“Oh, why, that’s one advantage of living in Ponyville!” Rarity smiled proudly. “How many other villages in Equestria can say they’ve got a fix-it-all zebra.”

“Ohhhhh…” Twilight smirked. “Braving trips into Everfree, aren’t you?”

“Can ya blame her?” Pinkie Pie bounced in place. “That Zecora has a remedy for everything!”

“Yeah, she sure does,” Rainbow said with a nod.

Silence.

Rainbow’s eyes twitched. She looked up, her gaze locked on some invisible point along the green horizon. “Yeah… she sure does...”

“Hmmm?” Rarity glanced up. “Something on your mind, Rainbow?”

“Hey… uh…” Rainbow fidgeted in mid-air. “It’s been fun n’all, but I just remembered something that I gotta do.” She smiled nervously. “So sorry, guys. I’ll make it up to you, I swear.”

“Oh, you know it’s alright, Dashie!” Pinkie waved a hoof. “Just don’t hit any radio antennae on the way to whatever awesome destination you’ve got ahead of you!”

“Yeah! I’ll… uhm… do just that…” Rainbow made a face, took a deep breath, and flew off on swift wings. “See ya!”

“Hmmm…” Twilight tapped her chin. “Rainbow certainly is busy these days.”

“I must agree. I’ve noticed it too.”

“You don’t think that she’s…” Twilight fumbled, then shook her head. “Naaaah…”

“What?” Pinkie Pie leaned forward, eyes wide. “What what what?”

“Well… uhm…” Twilight bit her lip, kneading the bench with her hooves. She looked at Rarity, then leaned in to whisper in her ear.

Pinkie watched, quivering with anticipation.

Rarity leaned back, gasping at Twilight. “You really think so?”

Twilight smiled mischievously. “Wouldn’t that be spectacular?”

“Well…” Rarity flounced her mane and smiled delicately. “She did ask to have her Gala dress fixed to its original splendor just last week.”

“You mean… right after the Gala?”

“Indeed.” Rarity blinked, then blushed slightly. “Oh dear. I’ve resorted to gossiping, haven’t I? Heheh… silly me…”

Pinkie gasped. “I knew it!” She cupped her pink cheeks in exultation. “Dashie’s done it! She’s gotten a stallion pregnant!”

”Pinkie…!