The storm begins to break just as you near the path to your house, and the veil of snow that conceals you fades away. You slide off Celestia’s back with cupcakes in hand and the two of you walk the rest of the way home at a leisurely pace. You even whistle a bit to try and act even more inconspicuous.
It’s kind of funny... if you think about it logically, other ponies catching the two of you riding probably wouldn’t be that big a deal. Sure, they’d be curious and have questions, but these miniature horses are an accepting lot and a little explanation about human traditions would satisfy them.
But this is too much to pass up. You feel like a little kid who’s been doing something he isn’t supposed to. Something FUN. And you totally got away with it! A quick glance at Celestia reveals that she’s in a similar state. This is a secret that you share, and that in and of itself is exciting.
Damn, Anon, haven’t you outgrown stuff like this yet? Or maybe we never really do, considering the giddy millennia’s-old co-conspirator by your side.
You glance over again and watch as Celestia prances through the snow, happier than you’ve seen her in quite a while. Seeing her happy makes you happy. It’s hard to believe this is the same creature that eyed you with cold indifference when you were brought before her shortly after your arrival in Equestria. If Twilight hadn’t vouched for you at the time, there’s no telling what she might—
“...Twilight Sparkle?” the alicorn at your side murmurs in disbelief.
Your attention immediately snaps back to the present and the sinking feeling of dread returns. There, sitting directly in the path to your home, is the purple alicorn herself.
While initially surprised by her sudden appearance, Celestia trots over to her without fear. “It’s good to see you again, my former student,” she says, “even if it’s only in the form of an astral projection. A very clever solution, by the way, but also expected of one with your talent and drive.”
Twilight giggles, basking in the praise. “Thank you, Prin— whoops... I mean, thank you, Celestia. It’s nothing special, really, just something one of my old friends taught me.”
Celestia smiles at her. “I’ve found that a skill learned from a good friend is special because each time you use it, you’ll be reminded of the time you shared together.” She approaches and attempts to nuzzle Twilight even though her body isn’t solid. Regardless, Twilight accepts and returns the gesture. “You look well, dear. I see you had the royal regalia resized to fit you. You truly look like a Princess now, but even still it’s hard for me to let go of my memory of the little filly who would hop and scurry between my legs and tell me she wanted to be just like me when she grew up. Tell me, is the life of royalty everything you imagined it would be?”
Twilight nods enthusiastically. “Oh yes, it’s everything I dreamed of and more! But... I’d be lying if I said there aren’t things I miss from my old life. That’s one of the reasons why I’m here.” She sits on her haunches, puffs out her chest and clears her throat. “Ahem. Dear Celestia, I’d like to report on what I’ve learned recently about the magic of friendship!”
“A friendship report!” Celestia exclaims. “How nostalgic... I’m all ears, Princess, and quite eager to hear what you’ve learned.” She sits on her haunches as well and watches Twilight attentively while you stay well away from the two but still close enough to hear their conversation.
Something about this isn’t right. Twilight appearing here is a surprise, sure, but she hasn’t so much as looked in your direction yet, much less acknowledged your presence in any way. Normally she’s all over you, but her focus is completely on Celestia now...
Twilight stands and paces through the snow. “Before I begin, I’d like to thank you for all you’ve done for me. Throughout my life you’ve always wanted what’s best for me, and wanted me to become the best pony I could be. Through every test, every lesson, every word of comfort or admonishment... you were trying to help me grow. I didn’t always realize it at the time, but I can recognize it now. Even after making me a Princess you wanted to push and develop me further...”
She stops her pacing and looks the white alicorn in the eyes with sincerity. “…And you have. Overcoming the Geas on Anon has been one of the hardest challenges I’ve ever faced, but with the help of my friends I’ve finally done it, and from that experience I’ve grown. I’m here to show you the fruits of your tutelage and guidance.”
“Overcome the Geas...?” Celestia asks, confusion in her voice. “Twilight, it isn’t a test, I cast that spell on Anonymous because he—”
Twilight holds up a hoof. “Ah-ah-ah! Please don’t interrupt... and there’s no need to continue denying it. This was a perfect test of the limits of my newly ascended power; an expertly designed lesson. Allow me to explain what I’ve learned...”
She clears her throat again. “At the beginning, I had no idea what to do and admittedly went a little crazy trying stuff. I saw the Geas as just another curse, so I focused my efforts on finding loopholes to exploit that would get me closer to Anon, which is the standard textbook response to curses which can’t be easily dispelled.”
A wavy image begins to appear on the ground before Celestia. You step a little closer and are able to see a simple picture of Rarity shimmering upon the snow’s surface. “Using my friend Rarity, I was able to test the Geas’ limits regarding rumors and relayed orders as they pertained to Anon. The findings were very interesting... I discovered that while direct mandates were ineffective, indirect orders relayed through an unaware third party do still work. This information was invaluable for me going forward, even if it didn’t seem useful at the time.”
An image of Rainbow Dash appears on the ground next. “Using my friend Rainbow Dash, I was able to test the Geas’ limits regarding my direct proximity to Anon. I had her wear a special gem attuned to my magical signature. Again, the findings were interesting but not that useful at the time, because I discovered that the Geas’ effective radius would change seemingly at random. This observation would later lead to a critical breakthrough in my research.”
Finally, an image of Fluttershy appears. “Using my friend Fluttershy, I was able to test the Geas’ reaction to simple enchanted items created with my magic but worn by another pony. I enchanted a variety of items, such as a fake moustache, with innocuous spells and had her confront Anon. It was through these experiments that I came to discover that my magic, if weak enough and not directly focused on Anon, wouldn’t be blocked, and it led to my realization that communicating using this method of astral projection would be possible.”
The image on the ground fades away. “Individually, these findings didn’t really lead to any significant practical applications, so I had to go back to the drawing board and re-examine the nature of the Geas itself.”
Celestia sits in silence. It’s tough to tell from this angle, but it looks like her smile has faded and her expression is stoic, yet still attentive.
Twilight continues, “Like I said, at first I thought it was just a curse. The bands on Anon’s wrists continually draw power from your magical ember to maintain the spell, so I categorized it as an Intimate Curse that relied on the physical closeness between the subject and the caster, much like a Changeling’s love draining spell but with the transfer flow of the magic reversed. That’s why I initially tried to separate you two; I figured if you were kept apart the Geas would weaken…”
Your fists clench in anger. That bitch... all that shit you went through with your financial problems was her fault. You figured it out a long time ago, but to hear it come out of her own mouth makes your blood boil.
“...But I later came to realize that I was completely wrong. A Geas is, at its most fundamental level, Friendship Magic! It’s not a curse, though it behaves similarly... but the key difference is that while you can curse an inanimate object, you can’t cast a Geas on one! The target of the Geas must be a living creature and you must have an existing relationship with that creature, be it positive or negative, for the spell to properly take hold! That’s when I realized that the strength of the Geas wasn’t fluctuating due to your physical distance from one another, it was fluctuating with your emotional distance! I sent Rainbow with her gem to test and confirmed my hypothesis.”
Wait, what?
“Everything started to make sense after that. It explains why you chose to live with Anon and strengthen your friendship with him. Through it all, you were strengthening the Geas’ power and thus creating the greatest challenge possible for me!” She rears up and clops her hooves together. “I’m so lucky to have a mentor who’s so confident in my abilities! I have to admit, observing the amazing growth of your friendship over these past few months makes me a little jealous, but knowing that it’s all for my sake means I can let it slide.”
It was all for Twilight...? No, there’s no way you’ll believe that for a second...
“So then!” Twilight chirps. “Given all this, I realized there was nothing I could do to break the Geas. Your friendship was becoming stronger by the day, sealing off what few possibilities were left for me to exploit. I ran and re-ran the calculations and hit a dead end... until I realized that the only effective way to fight Friendship Magic is to use... Friendship Magic! In a way, it’s a culmination of everything you’ve taught me!”
Twilight takes a few steps back and beams with pride. “Again, thank you for this test and this opportunity to grow as a pony. I humbly present, for your consideration, the results of my research...!”
She rears up and raises her forehooves to the sky in a grand gesture, and then…
Nothing happens.
You all just stand there in silence while Twilight maintains her pose.
You wait.
And wait.
And wait.
She continues to stand there, sweat dripping from her brow, but eventually she relents and returns to all four hooves, then angrily turns and shouts at the sky, “Oh for buck’s sake! I know I didn’t mistime my speech... I swear, if you want something done you’ve gotta...”
”..................”
Wait... you can hear something echoing from far away. It almost sounds like... screaming?
Twilight smiles, then nods. “Ah, there it is. Whew! I was starting to get worried...”
Yeah, it’s definitely screaming. Celestia stands and looks to the sky as well. The clouds above part and...
”THIS IS NO WAY TO TREAT A LADY~~~~!!!!!”
Your jaw drops. “Rarity?!”
Yep, it’s Squiggletail, and she’s falling directly toward your house incredibly fast. If she actually hits the ground at that speed...!
“You’ve gotta save her!” you shout at Celestia, but she’s already in the sky before you can even get the words out. You let out a sigh of relief, quickly followed by a gasp of horror as she unexpectedly abandons the rescue and turns in the air, heading for you instead.
“NO! What’re you...?!”
“We need to get away from here, Anonymous, and quickly!”
She scoops you up in a magical aura and pulls you close, then casts a teleport spell to move both of you away just as Rarity crashes through the roof of your house. The two of you reappear further down the street just in time to witness a massive explosion vaporize your home, leaving nothing but a crater marked by a strange glowing runic symbol behind.
You fall to your knees, utterly stunned at the sight. “Rarity... my house... what...?”
“Well done, well done!” Twilight’s astral projection merrily chirps as she flies over to join the two of you. “I didn’t think you’d realize it that quickly... I guess I still have a lot to learn!”
She turns to the crater that was once your house and nods her head with pride.
“The ultimate conclusion I reached was that I would have to use a Geas in order to break a Geas. It was an avenue of research that I had completely ignored because of Hoofstein’s Fourth Law. But there’s an exception to the rule... a little known footnote buried in one of his texts... but I’m sure you’ve realized what it is by now.”
Celestia scowls. “Yes... but never in a thousand years did I think you’d resort to using it. This is beyond abhorrent, Twilight, and I won’t let it go unpunished.”
Twilight giggles and turns her attention to you, prompting Celestia to wrap a wing around you and pull you close in response.
The purple alicorn grins. “You look confused, Anon. It’s really simple, even to somepony with little understanding of magic. Celestia’s cast a Geas on you to repel me. This is accomplished by a transfer of magical power, from Celestia to you, using the bands on your wrist as the conduit. Fairly simple, right? But the spell causes an interesting side effect! From a magical standpoint, you and Celestia are the same pony because you now share her magic...”
She turns her head to the sky again. “And likewise, anypony I cast a Geas on will share my magical hoofprint too. So if I were to cast one on, for example, Rarity, she’d be unable to approach you because your Geas would recognize her as me. The repulsion effect would be doubled if the Geas I cast happened to be one to repel Celestia, because then Rarity’s Geas would see you as Celestia!” She chuckles again. “So, what would be the point, right? That’s what I thought at first, too, because according to Hoofstein’s Fourth Law, ‘curses’ cast by mages of similar power with opposing effects will always repel one another with no harm done to the subjects or objects in question...”
She flaps her wings a few times in glee. “But there’s an exception~! A Geas is a constant transfer of power from the caster to the subject via the arcane bands, but the rate of that transfer can be controlled, and even overcharged! Unfortunately this tends to cause the holder of the overcharged Geas to explode, but the resulting magical backlash is able to penetrate, disrupt, and eventually eradicate an opposing spell! If that had been a direct hit, Anon’s Geas would’ve been broken, but even being near the impact zone is enough to have an effect. You can feel it, can’t you?”
Celestia stomps a hoof in anger and begins to charge her horn. “I’ve seen enough. You’ve clearly lost sight of everything I’ve ever taught you.”
Twilight just laughs. “I think that’s an unfair assessment. And don’t bother with your spell, this isn’t the real me, remember? I’m in Canterlot right now, so the worst you can do is disrupt my projection.” She giggles and turns her attention from Celestia back to you. “Don’t worry about your house, Anon, you didn’t need it anymore, anyway. You’ll be living with me in the palace soon enough!”
You open your mouth to speak, your fists clenched so hard in anger that your fingernails are starting to cut into your palms. “Get this through your thick skull: I will never, ever, ever love you, you sick freak. You’re insane! You just killed one of your own friends for god’s sake!”
Twilight shakes her head and sighs in response. “Sorry, Anon, but you’re wrong. I’m not insane, I’m a genius. There’s a difference. And killing my friends? Don’t be ridiculous...”
She looks to the sky again, and then you hear it.
”WA~HA~HA!”
Another scream from above. You turn your head to find another hole in the clouds has been ripped open and ANOTHER Rarity is falling directly toward you. She flails her hooves in terror as she plummets and you manage to catch sight of an odd glow coming from each one as she sails through the air. Your brain is completely broken at this point from trying to process what’s going on, but thankfully Celestia seems more aware because she teleports you both to a safe location as the new Rarity impacts and then detonates in a similar-sized explosion, which leaves behind yet another runic crater.
What. The. Fuck.
Twilight flutters over this newest crater with pride. “Yes, yes, yes! The blast radius is 0.43% greater than the initial tests seemed to indicate! How exciting!”
Again, she lands near the two of you. “It’d be more accurate to say that I’m killing clones of my friends. There’s a little pond in the Everfree called the Mirror Pool... very convenient for creating an army of expendable clones which I can enchant with a Geas and detonate without worry. Everypony knows that since the Bon Bon population control act of 1131 was ratified, clones aren’t really ponies. They’re technically autonomous magical constructs, and can thus be destroyed indiscriminately with no repercussions!”
She trots up to Celestia, all smiles. “And, well, I suppose that’s it! I’ve discovered the solution to the challenge you left for me, so you can go ahead and relinquish Anon into my care. I’m very grateful for the opportunity to grow as a result of this test, but I think I’ve more than proven myself, don’t you?”
Celestia shakes her head and flashes her former student an icy glare. “The only thing you’ve proven is how little you understand of both him and of the world around you. I fear I’ve made a terrible mistake.”
“Oh... so it’s not enough?” Twilight pouts. “Well, in the event that we’d have to do this the hard way, I did come prepared, just like you always taught me. But if it really has to be this way, I… won’t hold anything back, Teacher.”
She looks up, and Rarity’s familiar wailing echoes through the sky. Celestia reacts immediately, teleporting the two of you several thousand feet into the air. You scream as you start to plummet, but she flies underneath you and you end up falling right onto her soft, comfortable back just as the Rarity clone’s explosion thunders directly below.
“Maybe I’m not remembering it right, but was she always this crazy?!” you gasp, clasping her mane in a death grip with both hands and trying to get your heart rate under control.
Celestia looks upon the carnage below with exasperation. “I’d say this is typical, obsessive Twilight Sparkle. She’s come up with a brilliant solution marred by extremely questionable execution and little thought to the long-term consequences. I honestly can’t believe this… it seems I made a grave mistake in thinking that Luna would be more active in curtailing her more peculiar activities. My little sister must be really, really mad with me.”
You gulp. “So, now what do we do?”
“I’m not certain, but we should be safe in the air for the time being until I can determine how to handle this…”
“Don’t be so sure!” Twilight’s projection calls out from a nearby cloud, a wicked grin on her face. Three shimmering lights appear from above you, followed by a rush of air as several familiar rainbow trails rocket past.
The alicorn underneath you wastes no time in accelerating to a speed which makes you slightly uncomfortable to say the least, and three Rainbow clones follow. You hold on for dear life and try not to piss yourself as you careen through the sky. Celestia’s horn starts to shimmer and in an instant she’s recast the invisible barrier from earlier this morning, which greatly decreases the effect of the rushing air around you as she flies, allowing you to speak to one another.
“Can’t you blast them or something?!” you shout.
“I doubt it’d be effective,” she calls back. “They’re protected by a Geas designed to resist my magic.”
“Well then ‘port us outta here!!”
A Rainbow clone nearly clips Celestia’s wing and she banks hard before beginning an evasive downward spiral and diving into a nearby storm cloud, temporarily hiding the two of you from the pursuing clones.
“They’re too fast... I don’t want to risk the spell being interrupted; the consequences could be disastrous. It seems that we’ll have to do this the old fashioned way.”
“Great. You know, I think you owe me a goddamn apology. Didn’t you tell me, over and over again in fact, that she’d eventually cut this shit out?!”
Her ears fold back as she hovers in place. “I… I may have somewhat underestimated her on this issue. I’m not perfect, Anonymous, and everypony makes mistakes…”
“‘Not perfect’?! Roomie, we’re being chased through the sky by magically-charged clone bombs of Bluefast right now because your old student-turned-batshit-princess is so fucking delusional that she thinks the reason she can’t get into my pants is due to the fact that you made it some kind of crazy test for her to pass! I wouldn’t call this somewhat underestimating her on this issue!!”
She turns back to face you, puffing out her cheeks. “I… w-well, fine! I admit that I was completely wrong! Are you happy?!”
“Considering that my house just got blown up and we’re probably gonna die, not really!” you yell back.
The two of you lock eyes, the swirling storm clouds surrounding you kept at bay by the magical barrier, and you’re suddenly at a loss for words. The look of remorse on her face is so pronounced that it’s almost shocking. You’ve never seen her like this before, and despite the craziness of the situation you suddenly feel compelled to say something to comfort her. Yet, she turns away and speaks before you can find the words.
“I know it seems bad now, but all isn’t lost. It’s true that Twilight’s come up with a clever plan, but there’s a reason why she’s waited so long to execute it. The amount of time and magic it would take for her to cast this type of Geas on a clone of one of her friends is enormous. She’ll run out of ‘ammunition’ eventually... we’ll just need to outlast her until that happens.”
Her eyes meet yours again, and you can feel a deep confidence burning within them.
“I’m sorry, Anonymous. But if you’ll put your trust in me, I will see you through this. Our bargain was that she would not lay a hoof on you, and I don’t intend to let it go unfulfilled.”
You reach over and pat Celestia’s neck, your own confidence beginning to return. “I trust you, Roomie. If you say we’re gonna make it out of this, then I believe you.”
You flash her a reassuring smile, which she returns in kind before beginning her ascent and eventually breaking through the lower layer of storm clouds and into a windy, empty pocket of open air between the storm and the ceiling of another, much higher cloud layer. The three clones are immediately on your tail as soon as they spot you, and the chase is on.
You notice a slight burning sensation on your wrists which you choose to ignore as she carries you through the sky. The zigzagging rainbow trails are too close for comfort now, and if she doesn’t do something drastic soon they’ll definitely overtake you.
“I’ll need to perform some advanced flight maneuvers, but you’ll be fine as long as you hold onto my mane,” Celestia calls back. “Are you ready?”
You grip her mane tighter. “As I’ll ever be.”
“Then let’s begin.”
She’s off like a bullet. Two of the clones tear after you while the third breaks off and disappears into the upper cloud layer.
“Be careful!” you shout. “I think one of ‘em is gonna try to dive on us from above!”
You hear the telltale sound of a Sonic Rainboom and sure enough, a rainbow trail of death is heading right for you. Celestia angles her wings and airbrakes hard, stopping short of her expected position and causing the diving Rainbow to miss her target. The two clones behind you see their opportunity and begin to close in...
“Close your eyes, please!” she calls back as she attempts to regain her previous speed.
“Huh?”
“That was your only warning!”
“Okay, okay!”
You shut your eyes. Maybe this is for the best... you’re not sure if you want to see what’s eventually going to kill you anyway...
There’s a flash from her horn that’s so bright you can see it through your eyelids, and it instantly causes you to recoil. Celestia lurches as she takes an evasive dive and soon enough you hear an explosion behind you as the two pursuing clones smash into one another and detonate in a shower of magical sparks. The burning in your wrists increases, but you push past the pain and risk opening your eyes to find the sole remaining Dash buzzing after you like a pissed off hornet.
“Two down, one to go, huh?” you ask, a spark of hope beginning to build that you’ll actually make it through this.
But as if on cue, a series of booms echo in the distance and five more Rainbow trails tear through the upper cloud layer.
“For fuck’s sake! Maybe I should’ve gone to work today after all...”
Celestia giggles. “She’s not making it easy, is she?”
You shake your head. “...Let ‘em get close. I’ve got a plan.”
The alicorn grins. “Very well. I trust you, Anonymous. If you say you have a plan, then I believe you.” She laughs as you reach forward and flick one of her ears with your finger for trying to be clever, then slows like you asked, allowing the clones to approach.
They’re all beside you now, three on each side and itching to make a move. You point to a random clone, cup your hand over your mouth and shout, “I think that one’s faster! And she’s definitely cooler, too!”
The other clones begin to go apeshit as the one you pointed to blushes and hoof pumps.
“Awwww yeah!”
“What the...?!”
“Nuh uh!”
“I’m totally faster than her!”
“R-Really..?”
“Does she even lift?!”
Celestia dives away as the six Rainbows start throwing insults and eventually hooves at one another. A comical dust cloud forms over their midair melee until one of the clones explodes, causing a chain reaction that detonates the rest.
“Holy shit, they’re stupid as hell,” you mutter as you watch the magical fireworks unfold.
Celestia nods. “Yes, clones generally are.”
“Really? I didn’t notice much difference from the normal one.”
You can see the internal battle play at the corner of Sun Horse’s lips as she tries not to laugh. You help give her a little push by patting the side of her neck again.
“C’mon, it’s just us here.”
The guffaw that followed from her was totally worth it.
~~~~~~~~~
The two of you descend from the clouds into a snowy field near the lake to the south of Ponyville. As soon as she touches down, you hop from Celestia’s back, stretch, and then collapse in the fresh snow.
“You realize if she cloned Pinkie we’re done for, right?”
“We’ll deal with that hurdle when we come to it,” she replies.
You hear a nerdy chuckle from behind you. “No, Anon, I learned my lesson with that one. We’re not going to be cloning Pinkie again. For any reason. EVER.”
You quickly sit up to find Twilight’s projection nearby, and the last of your patience snaps. This day, which started out so great, has completely gone to shit. You’ve got clones up your ass, your house has been destroyed, your wrists feel like they’re about to melt off... and it’s all because of HER! You stand and confront the purple alicorn.
“Look, let me make this as clear as I possibly can. I’M NOT INTERESTED! I don’t love you. I never loved you. I’m never GOING to love you, so just stop this! Call off your stupid fucking clone army and just GO HOME already and STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!”
Twilight shakes her head. “You still don’t realize you love me yet... but don’t worry, after a few nights together that’ll change. And you’re so silly, Anon, why should I give up now when I’ve already won?”
You feel something on your leg. Slowly, you tilt your head downward to find Fluttershy’s two cyan eyes staring back.
“Um... hello.” She promptly blushes, turns away and whimpers.
“Well, it appears I have you in checkmate,” Twilight boasts, turning her attention to Celestia. “That clone will detonate on my command. I’ve more than proven that your Geas has been overcome... what more do you need to see, Teacher?”
The larger alicorn sighs and trots up beside you. “That’s enough, Twilight. It’s time to stop all this. I understand what it’s like, my little pony. I really, truly do know what it’s like to face unrequited love. But you have to understand that Anonymous can’t return your feelings. I’m afraid you’ve misunderstood... this was never a test for you. I cast the Geas on him because he requested protection from you in compensation for bringing me the Orb of Ascension. It was part of the bargain we arranged. I’m sorry, but what he says is the truth.”
Twilight steps back a few paces, her pupils shrinking. “Th-that’s crazy... a pathetic last-ditch attempt to save yourselves and deny my victory. Ha! Ha ha! Good one, I almost fell for it...” You can see strands of her mane and tail begin to pop out of place. “Now, now... come on, Anon... it’s over. It’s time for you to take your rightful place by my side...”
“Twilight, I don’t—”
“DON’T YOU DARE SPEW THAT GARBAGE ABOUT NOT LIKING PONIES AT ME!” Twilight’s Royal Canterlot Voice rings out across the field, scaring the sparse few winter birds from their nests. “I’ve watched you through my friends, Anon. They’ve told me how you look at her.” She turns to Celestia, her breathing ragged. “And they’ve told me how you look at him. Tell me... was it all part of the plan to strengthen the Geas, or did you really start to fall for him? Or maybe you just wanted to hurt me as much as possible by taking something else precious to me away!!”
“Twilight, what...?” Celestia stammers.
“ENOUGH!” she screams. “I don’t want to hear it. I still respect you, Celestia, and I’m still grateful. But you’ve LOST THIS GAME and now it’s time for you to bow out gracefully. You gave him to me when you gave me the crown and I will not be denied!”
The white alicorn’s eyes narrow. “I will not. Anonymous is not a prize to be won, or some sovereign entitlement to claim. He’s a noble, living creature and he is precious to me too.”
With a sigh, Twilight turns away from you both. “I see... then you’ve brought this upon yourself. Override protocol: bluejay.”
The Fluttershy clone begins to tremble and the Geas bands around her hooves shine. Shit, she’s gonna...!
A flash. You’re blinded, but you quickly recover. There’s a huge crater in the ground nearby to where you’re kneeling, but thankfully you’re still in one piece. You frantically look around and spot Celestia on the other side of the crater, and she looks fine too. You can see her horn crackling with residual magic... she must’ve teleported both of you away before the clone exploded.
You let out the breath you were holding. “We made it...”
“No, Anon,” the purple alicorn’s voice coos from behind you. “It’s all exactly as I planned. I told you before; if I couldn’t find a way inside the fortress, I’d bring down the mountain. She forced my hoof... and this is the result.”
You lock eyes with Celestia across the crater. She mouths something to you, but you’re too far away to understand.
The light comes first, robbing you of your vision. Then the sound, nearly shattering your eardrums. Next comes the shockwave and you tumble backwards uncontrollably, but it doesn’t stop there. You can hear smaller booms and impacts resound nearby and feel the resulting shockwaves as well. Your wrists are on fire now, you’re sure of it...
When you finally manage to open your eyes, you can’t even begin to process the sight before you.
The original crater is in front of you, or at least part of it. A little further away is a crater so large that it’s taken a portion of the lake and forest with it. You stumble to your feet and clumsily scramble to the edge, but can’t find any sign of a pony within, so you slide down inside, throwing caution to the wind, and begin to dig. And dig. And dig.
“C’mon Roomie... c’mon Roomie... c’mon Roomie...!!”
At last, your hands find a matted fur coat and with a heave you manage to free her upper body from the compacted earth. But the pony before you looks so different... gone is her great multicolored mane, now replaced by dirtied and much shorter strawberry-colored hair. She seems a tiny bit smaller, too, but thankfully still seems to be breathing. Between the white coat, strawberry hair, and brown patches of dirt that still cling to her, she almost looks like a bucket of that Neapolitan ice cream she likes so much…
A few tears fall from your eyes, but you wipe them away. There’s no time for crying here... you need to get help... get her to the hospital so they can treat her wounds...
“She was bombarded by the last of my overcharged Geas weapons, designed to be the antithesis of her own magic. When she wakes up, she’ll probably be on the level of an average unicorn, if even that. She’ll fully recover in time... in two hundred... maybe five hundred years or so. It’s unfortunate, but without her cooperation there was no other way to break her Geas, Anon…”
You turn to Twilight and only stop yourself from lunging at her when you remember she’s just a projection.
“I’ll never forgive you for this. I’m going to find a way to make her better... and then I’m going to make you pay, and I’ll fight my way through every damn guard in the Equestrian army if I have to.”
Twilight merely chuckles at your anger. “You have two days to do it, then. Look at your wrists.”
You do so and find that the Geas bands are so bright now they’re almost blinding.
“That won’t last,” she continues. “Celestia must’ve known this would be the result from the beginning, because she started funneling more magic through the conduit when the fight started. Not enough to harm you, of course, but enough to strengthen the Geas to where it’d still be effective without her magic for a while. It’ll last two days, Anon. After that, I’ll be coming to collect you and our new life will start... together. I’ll be looking forward to it...”
She turns from you and her image fades away.
You suppress the conflicting feelings of grief, loss, anger and fear welling within you and continue to dig.
~~~~~~~~~
You only left her bedside when you got full assurances from the doctors that she would be okay. From what they said, aside from the magic drain her injuries were thankfully minor and she’d recover after a good rest. Damn hospitals are real sticklers about their visiting hours, though, so you’ve been kicked out, and it’s at this point that you’ve come to the stark realization that you’re now homeless.
You sit down on a park bench near the town square. It’d probably be best to go ask the Cakes if they can offer you a spare bed tonight, but in two days… what are you going to do?
“Well, somepony sure looks down in the dumps.”
You lift your head to see Applejack standing in front of you wearing an apple themed scarf and her classic Stetson hat. She hops up on the bench next to you, but you don’t really feel like talking to anyone at the moment.
“Heard there was a lotta commotion in town today. Mac said he saw bright lights ‘n whatnot flashin’ in the distance a little after noon.”
You look away, trying to ignore her.
“Ya reckon Twilight had somethin’ ta do with it?”
A pulse of rage runs through your body at the sound of her name, and you turn back to the farmpony to shout, “Don’t you d—”
...but find an apple jammed in your mouth instead. Without thinking, you start to chew.
Applejack looks at you expectantly. “Is it good?”
Yes, it’s good. Good enough to make you forget about all your problems for a few minutes, at least. You nod in response and she smiles.
“Good ta hear! Ah’d hope so, considerin’ ya paid 15 million bits for it.”
You nearly choke, but manage to swallow the piece in your mouth before ripping the apple away.
“I WHAT?!?!”
The orange pony begins to laugh uncontrollably. “S-Sorry there, sugarcube, it’s just an old Apple Family joke we like ta play sometimes. The apple’s on the house. Ah’m actually here ta deliver your real order...” She removes her hat and pulls some forms out. “Or ah guess it’s really Celestia’s order, but your name’s on it so it oughta be okay for ya ta sign. Where is she, anyhow?”
“She’s... not feeling well right now,” you mutter, signing the paperwork without really paying attention to what’s on it before handing it back. “So where’s this expensive thing you’re delivering, anyway? I don’t see it.”
Applejack looks at you like you’re an idiot for a few moments, then points a hoof toward the sky. Your gaze follows it, and...
“No... way...”
The farmpony chuckles at your reaction. “Ah said the same thing when she arrived earlier this mornin’ from the Apple N’ Orange berths in Manehatten. Ah heard Uncle Orange himself was real proud’a this one... called it his greatest work, and ah’m willin’ ta believe him.”
There’s an airship hovering above Ponyville. But it’s not just any airship. It’s huge, like those rich pony yachts you’d see floating around the larger cities from time to time when you visited.
But you can tell, even from the ground, that this is no yacht; it’s a machine built for speed. The large helium frame is angled to cleave through the air, as is the much smaller ship mounted below it. Four downward-facing propellers on each side of the ship provide vertical lift, keeping it in place, while an inactive set of massive twin rotors attached to the back of the helium frame are seemingly enough to propel the ship into orbit if need be. The various air fins lining both the frame and the ship itself look like they could easily allow it to perform all sorts of acrobatics if the pilot was bold, or maybe stupid enough to try...
You notice a red face peek over the side of the ship, followed by a waving hoof. You and Applejack both wave back.
“Mac ‘n Apple Bloom are up there right now. There ain’t enough room ta land her here in town, but he wanted a chance ta give her a spin before we signed her over ta ya. Ain’t often ya see him get so excited about somethin’.”
The ship turns in the air, its twin rotors slowly beginning to spin, and then it vanishes over the horizon without a sound. It’s unbelievably fast…
Applejack hops off the bench and faces you. “Why don’t ya head on over ta the Acres with me and ah’ll give ya a tour of the interior?”
You push the many thoughts swirling in your head away and force yourself to stand.
“Lead the way.”
~~~~~~~~~
It’s perfect.
It’s certainly no luxury ship, but it has everything you need. More than everything, really.
The living deck feels like home. Master bedroom, guest bedroom, crew quarters, fully stocked kitchen and pantry, laundry room, two bathrooms, and a grand meeting / living area equipped with the bigger TV you wanted! At the very least, it looks like you’ve found a place to stay tonight.
“Well, that’s it ah guess,” Applejack says as you complete the tour. “Ya’ve got some readin’ ta do before ya attempt ta fly, but the manual’s pretty straightforward. Ah’d better be gettin’ back before Granny starts ta miss me. If ya haven’t had dinner yet we’re always willin’ ta set another chair at the table.”
“Thanks, AJ. For everything.”
She chuckles. “Don’t thank me! Ah should be thankin’ you. Part’a that money went toward helpin’ the Apples start a new frontier farm. Even though we ain’t all farmers, it’s still what most’a us are called ta do.”
“I’ll think about your offer for dinner. I just need a while, if you don’t mind.”
“Sure thing, sugar.” She turns and exits down the gantry.
You start to tour the living quarters again, walking from room to room, trailing your fingers across the smooth wooden walls and paneling. You stop in the kitchen, where a welcoming fruit basket’s been left on the table. Apples and oranges, obviously. Giving in to your hunger, you sit down and grab an apple and begin to eat.
But your eye catches the corner of an envelope underneath the basket itself. You shift it aside to find a sealed letter with your name on it, and out of curiosity you open it to find something that takes your breath away.
There’s only one creature in the world whose penmanship is this perfect...
My Little Human,
As I write this, I’m resting upon a pile of bits and assorted other treasures in our living room. I’m certain that if you saw all of this you’d have another one of your funny little foaming-at-the-mouth moments, but as much as I’d like to see it, I’m hopeful it will all be gone by the time you arrive back home. I must admit, I acted a bit on impulse when I went to face my old acquaintance Agamemnon and kindly ask him for a donation. Before I knew it I was back here with all this treasure and without any idea of what to do with it. It’s more than the both of us could ever really want or need. I left a life of luxury behind by choice, and you never struck me as the type who yearns for riches, so I’ve decided to use it to buy you a gift instead. I’m hopeful that it will be to your liking.
I spent most of the night pondering over what I could give you that would appropriately express my gratitude for the time you’ve shared with me, and I believe I’ve found just the thing. An agent from the Apple and Orange shipyard will be here shortly to collect my payment along with my design requests and this letter.
Anonymous, you should see how your face lights up when you talk about your time climbing mountains back on Earth. Many times have you described to me the freedom and euphoria you’ve felt when standing above the clouds from the summit, gazing upon the sky and the world below. Sadly, I have never really experienced such a thing myself; there’s little point in climbing mountains when you have wings, after all. But the joy you conveyed to me through your words touched my heart and I could feel it, even if it’s just a pale imitation of the real thing. I want you to experience this joy again many, many more times over your long life, and I’d like to be there to see it, if only once.
I can’t help you conquer a mountain, and I can’t return you to Earth. But maybe, through this, I can give you the sky you love so much.
Your Freeloading Roommate,
Celestia
You fold the letter back up and return it to the envelope. You wouldn’t want your tears to stain it, right?
“This is too much, Roomie…”
“Cel.”
You lift your head to find the freshly-bandaged alicorn herself standing in the doorway, her strawberry mane wildly framing her tired but smiling face.
“Call me Cel.”
You immediately jump up and run to her before pulling her into a hug, careful to avoid putting too much pressure on her injuries.
“What’re you doing here? You should be resting!”
She lightly returns your hug. “Oh, I discharged myself. I’m fine, Anonymous, really.”
“Anon.”
Her eyes meet yours and a sly smile begins to play on her lips.
“Anon.”
You ruffle her mane a bit. “I like the new hair. Makes you look a lot younger. But damn, Cel, look at all this! You really must want me indebted to you for life, huh?”
She trots with you into the living area. “If you can’t accept it as a gift, then think of it as an exchange, Anon. As much as you dislike it, I’ll need to ask you to undertake another journey for my sake, and I’m afraid it won’t be as simple as a walk to Sugarcube Corner this time.”
“I don’t care what it is; you want it, you got it. It’s the least I can do.”
She nods. “I’m glad. We need to leave tomorrow, so you should spend some time with the pilot’s manual tonight. I hope you’re a quick study.”
You let out a nervous laugh. “I tend to learn through doing as opposed to studying. Hopefully that’ll work out for something like this.”
“I suppose we’ll see, won’t we?”
You run a hand down her back. “There are so many things I want to say to you right now, but I guess I’ll start with something simple. I’ve got an open invitation to dinner at the Apples’ and I’m sure they wouldn’t mind if I brought a guest. Have you eaten?”
She shakes her head. “No, I think dinner would be wonderful right now.”
The two of you walk side by side down the gantry and toward the illuminated farmhouse in the distance, just as the stars begin to appear in the winter sky.