Apple Bloom woke, bleary-eyed as the sun poured through the window of her room. Somepony had opened the curtains; she couldn’t tell if it was Big Mac, Granny Smith, or…
It probably was her. She used to wake Apple Bloom up for school, but in the last two months, ever since Apple Bloom had found out… well, Applejack didn’t wake Apple Bloom up anymore.
Nowadays, it was the sun that woke her up; she could only ignore it for so long.
“Mornin’, Bloom,” Big Mac said as she entered the kitchen.
That was another thing that had changed.
For most of her life, Applejack would have breakfast with the filly, then see her off to the gate as she left for school. There were the odd days, especially during apple bucking season, that Applejack left for the fields before dawn, and Apple Bloom would have to get ready for school by herself.
Apple Bloom nodded to her… uncle? It felt strange— that word didn’t feel right to her. A scowl crossed her face as she thought about it again.
She grunted a response at him.
Granny Smith and Big Mac sat at the table, waiting for her to join them. As she had done every morning, she served herself a bowl of oats and milk with a few slices of apple. Like every morning, Granny Smith would offer some of whatever she had made the family for breakfast. Every morning, Apple Bloom would turn it down in favor of oats and milk. Today, Granny Smith had made pancakes, topped with diced stewed apple and cinnamon.
Apple Bloom was getting really sick of oats and milk.
“Ya ready fer school, li’l filly?” Granny asked, before lifting a bite of pancake to her mouth.
“Eeyup,” Apple Bloom responded, not looking up from her cereal.
“Gonna go crusadin’ with yer li'l friends after school, too?”
“Eeyup.”
“You’re soundin’ just like Big Mac when he was yer age,” the Apple matriarch laughed. “Never did grow out of it, though.” Big Mac opened his mouth to protest, but was shushed by the old mare.
Apple Bloom ignored their gazes, ignored their attempts at conversation. She was still angry at them, and if they thought a few apologies would make up for years of lying to her… well, she didn’t care what they thought.
“Ah’m goin’ t’ school,” Apple Bloom said as she pushed away from the table.
She slipped her saddle bag on and meandered to the door. As predicted, Big Mac had gotten up at the same time.
“Okay if Ah walk ya t’ the gate?” he asked.
“Whatever…”
It annoyed her. It made her… angry. It was always Applejack who walked her to the gate, whenever she could. Now Applejack was avoiding her; not that Apple Bloom wanted to see her, even if she was there.
Big Mac followed her in silence. It annoyed Apple Bloom; he just followed. Why did he even bother? She didn’t need Granny, she didn’t need Big Mac, and she didn’t need—
“Oh… howdy, Big Mac,” Applejack called out, greeting them. “Hi, Bloom,” she added with a whisper. Applejack stood at the gate, harnessed into the market wagon.
“Weren’t ya gonna leave an hour ago?” Big Mac asked.
“Busted wheel.” Applejack motioned towards the wheel on the cart. “Took me a mite longer than Ah expected t’ fix it.”
Applejack paused before addressing Apple Bloom. “Well, Bloom. Looks like we’re headin’ inta town ‘bout the same time.” Her voice quavered as she asked, “Up fer some company?”
No!
“…Whatever” Apple Bloom answered, not bothering to look at her si—moth… Applejack.
Applejack grunted as she started hauling the cart. Apple Bloom knew how much produce they loaded those carts up with, and had always been envious of Big Mac and Applejack’s strength. They had always told her that she’d be that strong one day.
“So…” Applejack started, weakly, “…y’all goin’ crusadin’ after school today?”
No! Because I never do that and that would be totally out of the ordinary.
“Probably,” Apple Bloom responded, still looking down at the dirt road ahead of her.
“So what are ya gonna try ta get yer cutie marks in this time?”
Apple Bloom silently shrugged, a feat much harder to accomplish when walking down a dirt road.
“Well, Ah bet whatever it is, y'all will find ‘em soon,” Applejack responded, nodding sagely. “Jus’ keep tryin’ and you’ll get there.”
What happened t’ ‘it’ll happen when th’ time is right’? Apple Bloom huffed. Ah thought ya ‘couldn’t rush these things.’ Ah know what yer tryin’ t’ do; Ah ain’t stupid. Yer as see-through as… as… as some kinda see-through thing.
Apple Bloom scowled as she picked up her pace.
Glass! See-through as glass!
She smirked at her internal quip, but soured when she heard Applejack’s grunt. The mare had managed to keep pace with the filly.
“Maybe tonight Ah can help ya with yer apple buckin’ practice? Or yer homework, if ya need—”
“Ah don’t need help!” Apple Bloom hissed, cutting the older mare off. “Ah’m fine!”
“O—Okay Sugarcube,” Applejack replied, avoiding Apple Bloom’s glare. “Ah didn’ mean nothin’ by it.”
“Sweetie Belle an’ Scootaloo will be waitin’… Ah gotta go,” Apple Bloom said, as she started to trot. She could hear Applejack grunting, as the mare tried to match the filly’s speed again, but with the added burden of the cart’s weight, there was no way she could keep up now that Apple Bloom had broken into a gallop.
“Are you comfortable, Apple Bloom?”
Miss Cheerilee lay across her reading pillow. Despite having met with her teacher like this for the past few months, Apple Bloom still felt a little awkward talking to her teacher about these things.
But she didn’t really have anypony else to talk to. Twilight had offered, but she was Applejack’s friend. Miss Cheerilee said there was a mare who worked at the hospital that she could talk to, but she wasn’t sick. Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo, for all that they meant well, could only offer the advice “Don’t let it get to you.”
So she had taken Miss Cheerilee’s offer up, and they had been meeting every Thursday.
Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo were under the belief that Miss Cheerilee was helping Apple Bloom with her grades, and the filly had not done anything to dissuade them from this assumption.
So once again, Apple Bloom found herself getting comfortable on the reading cushions in the school classroom.
“How have you been feeling this week?”
“Ah dunno,” Apple Bloom replied, as she dug a hoof into the cushion. “Everythin’s different at home now. Big Mac an’ Granny are always tryin’ t’ talk t’ me… but Ah don’t know what t’ say ta ‘em. Ah mean…
“What do Ah say ta ‘em? Pass th’ apple sauce, and thanks fer lyin’ t’ me mah whole life!” Apple Bloom gritted her teeth, burrowing her face into the cushion. “Mah whole life! They’ve been lyin’ fer mah whole life! Every year, Ah’d go with mah… well, the ponies who told me they were mah brother and sister, t’ lay flowers on the graves mah lyin’ siblings said were mah parents’.
“An’ now Granny Smith and Big Mac jus’ expect me t’ ferget all that?”
Apple Bloom could feel the heat in her face, despite the dampness of her cheeks. It was stupid, she wasn’t sad, she was angry! Why did she have to keep crying?
Cheerilee helped the filly dry her eyes. “Have they asked you to forget everything?”
“Well—” Apple Bloom paused. “No… no they haven’t.”
“Have you spoken to them about it?”
“No…”
“If you could, what would you ask them?”
“Ah— Ah don’t know. When Ah’m around them, Ah jus’ get…” Apple Bloom grunted, and kicked her pillow.
“Well, if you can’t think when you are around them, why don’t we write out a list of questions?” Cheerilee smiled. “Sometimes, when we’re in a situation that makes us angry, or upset, we struggle to think straight. If you write out what you want to ask beforehoof, it will make it easier… would you like to try that?”
Apple Bloom nodded. Cheerilee got up from her pillow, and picked up a quill and paper off her desk. Sitting back down on her pillow, she addressed the filly.
“Okay, so how about you tell me what you want to ask, and I’ll write the questions down for you?”
“Ah—” Apple Bloom started, “Ah want…”
“It’s okay, Apple Bloom,” Cheerilee interrupted, “Take your time, as much as you need.”
Apple Bloom fidgeted as they sat in silence. A million thoughts flew through her mind, along with a million things she wanted to say to her family. None of those things were something she thought her teacher would want to write down.
“Why?” Apple Bloom said, breaking the silence.
“Hmmm?” Cheerilee asked.
“Why did they lie t’ me?” Apple Bloom wrang her hooves. “If they loved me… Ah mean, if they really loved me… why lie t’ me?
“Why did they hide it from me?” Apple Bloom stood up. “Why did they keep it a secret fer so long…?
“Why did they keep it a secret at all‽” She smashed her hoof against the ground.
“Apple Bloom—” Cheerilee held a hoof out to the pacing filly.
“Why‽” Apple Bloom turned to face Cheerilee, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Families are supposed t’ love each other an’ tell th’ truth. Why did they hide it from me?”
“I don’t think them loving you is in ques—”
“An’ if it were such an important secret, why couldn’t they keep lyin’ t’ me?” Apple Bloom yelled as she paced furiously. “Why couldn’t they jus’ keep lyin’, and let me be happy?”
“Would you really want that?” Cheerilee asked.
“Ah don’t know… maybe?” Apple Bloom stopped her pacing. “She could’a told me anythin’… like, maybe they could have told me th’ baby never made it…”
“Would you have really been happy with that?” Cheerilee asked, raising her eyebrow.
“Ah— Ah don’t know, Miss Cheerilee.” Apple Bloom looked up at her teacher. “Ah guess Ah wouldn’t have been happy with that, no.” She sat back down. “Ah would have been sad that Ah lost a niece, even if she never existed.
“Big Mac, ‘n Granny Smith… Ah jus’ don’t know if Ah can trust ‘em anymore, Miss Cheerilee,” Apple Bloom said. “We’re supposed t’ be honest as Apples, but that don’t mean much no more…”
“And what about y— Applejack?” Cheerilee asked.
“Well, she ain’t been lyin’ to me since, Ah guess.” Apple Bloom scowled. “But that’s only because she’s never around. She used t’ wake me up fer school… and we’d have breakfast before Ah left. Nearly every mornin’.
“Now, she don’t even want t’ talk ta me.”
“Are you certain she doesn’t want to talk to you?” Cheerilee asked.
“Well…” Apple Bloom replied. “She was late goin’ t’ market this mornin’, but Ah—”
“What happened?”
“Ah ran off…” the filly replied, sinking into her pillow once more. She sat in silence, desperately avoiding Cheerilee’s gaze.
“Apple Bloom, you will need to talk with her… with them all.” Cheerilee sighed. “It might be hard to talk with them, and you might want to say some things that may hurt… but it will only work if you try.
“They might not be the family you thought they were, but they are still your family.” She put a gentle hoof on the filly’s shoulder. “Do you understand?”
“Ah’m sorry, Miss Cheerilee,” Apple Bloom said as she shrugged off her teacher’s hoof. “Ah’m not feelin’ too good. Can we leave it fer today?”
Apple Bloom could feel the mare’s gaze upon her; there was always something about a teacher that could do that. The filly didn’t dare look up at her.
“Of course, Apple Bloom,” Cheerilee replied. “These meetings are for your benefit, so if you want to finish early—”
“Thanks, Miss Cheerilee.” Apple Bloom dashed to her desk, and collected her books and saddle bag.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Cheerilee called after the rapidly retreating filly. “And if you ever need me—”
Apple Bloom hadn’t heard the rest, as she had already exited the school house.