//------------------------------// // Chapter 3 // Story: Chocolate Pony Sailor // by DarthDusk //------------------------------// Pinkie Pie woke up in a strange place far from Equestria it seems. In a place perhaps she’s only perhaps seen in her dreams. In front of her stood seven doors that led to secret worlds of untold. And each door was in the shape of yummy sugary treats of olde. One door was of taffy, another of candied hearts that are chalky and unpleasant, next to a sugary blob. But one stood different from the rest, a door of chocolate with a chocolate pony Sailor knob. “Where am I? Is this Vanhoover” Pinkie was nervous. She was somewhere she had never been before and the sky was quickly turning dark and the shadow around her was starting to grow. Suddenly she smelt it the delicious waft on freshly made chocolate coming from the chocolate bar door. “Mmmm… Chocolate…” a stream of drool rolled down the side of her mouth. Pinkie Pie quickly opened the jumped through the doorway without thinking twice. She was expecting to find a mound of delicious chocolate but fell into a strange and bizarre vortex which smelled like hot coco. Suddenly she landed again with sickly bone crunching for the seconded time today. Pinkie picked herself up to look around and what she saw brought her to tears. “No… No words! No words to describe it! Poetry!” Pinkie just stood there completely in awe “They should've sent a poet! So beautiful. So beautiful... I had no idea!” The whole world was made entirely made of chocolate! Pinkie Pie had found herself in the mystical Land of Chocolate. The Land of Chocolate was entirely made of chocolate, including houses, lamppost, paths, rivers and even the ponies that lived there were made entirely out of chocolate!! Pinkie Pie saw a group of chocolate rabbits hopping in a straight towards a small chocolate village. She began hopping in unison with the little chocolate bunnies straight into the chocolate town where Pinkie raced all over town with a massive smile on her face waving to everypony she passed by, however she quickly stopped waving and began devouring everything in her path from lampposts to lawn ornaments. A small chocolate dog ran up to Pinkie Pie and began licking her face and yapping happily believing it met someone to play with. Pinkie stared into the puppy’s chocolate malt balls eyes with gentle smile on her face... CHOMP!! She bit off the poor chocolate dog’s head. “Mmmm… Chocolate…” Pinkie said with now a waterfall of drool pouring out of her mouth. She took another bite….. Everything went dark again….. ….. It was 6am when she woke up; she had been unconscious for eighteen hours. The floor was covered in so much drool Gummy was swimming around in his own little pond. Pinkie Pie immediately stood up a pounced on the Chocolate Pony Sailors. She tore off the foil like a mad pony! “CHOCOLATE YUM!!!” she screamed, her eyes were like fire from the pits of Tartarus. Pinkie devoured them six at a time until they were all gone. By the time she was done eating her mouth was dripping with both chocolate and drool. Suddenly her sanity returned to normal… or at least Pinkie Pie normal. She put her hooves over her mouth in horror after looking at the carnage all around her. One of the twins’ stuffed animals was without a head and covered in saliva and chocolate stains. “Oh no” Pinkie Pie meekly whimpered “Gummy, I’ve been a bad sailor… I ate the whole dang dinghy, crew and all! "She searched the remains of foil, chocolate, cardboard, and drool hopping to find something, anything that would help her. But there was nothing what so ever. “NOW I’LL NEVER HAVE MAJOR BOOTY!!” Pinkie yelled before bawling harder than she’s ever had in her entire life “WAAAAAAAA…what’s this now?” She noticed a small piece of paper stuck at the base of her hooves. “It’s a message from the Chocolate Pony Sailor!” It read ‘It’s Time To Reorder! ‘ Along with a line for her to write her name. “Aye Matey” It was the Chocolate Pony Sailor from the comic book ad, now he was on the reorder form “It’s time for some fresh cargo, now shove off sailor. That’s A Direct Order From Your Captain!! “ “Aye Aye little sailor pony guy!” Pinkie Pie jumped to her hooves and raced towards the door with the form in her mouth. “Full Speed Ahead!” She ran past the Cakes who were still a bit worried about what their live-in employee was up to. Just as Pinkie burst through the door she crashed into the same delivery Pegasus who delivered her starter kit. “Uh, I have another package for a Miss Pinkamena Diane Pie” he said while trying to stand up on all for legs. “Wow! Your delivery service is amazing; I can’t believe it’s here!” Pinkie said snatching the box out of his hooves and went back inside. “You won’t be disappointed this time Chocolate Pony Sailor, you’ll see! As Celestia is my witness I’m gonna be the best dang sailor in the whole dang army! I’ll sell gazillions! Together will make major booty! BECAUSE YOU’RE SO BOOTYLICIOUS!!“