//------------------------------//
// A meeting at the Everfree Castle. 
// Story: The League of Humanity. 
// by Ssendam the Masked 
//------------------------------//


Everfree Forest.


Yoshimitsu looked at a familiar sight- The Castle of the Pony Sisters. He sighed; there were a lot of bad memories that he associated with this place. Memories of their disastrous first meeting with the ponies came to mind. Tobi clapping his hands together, which was perceived as an aggressive tactic. Mighty Whitey chasing them down with a white hot fury, sending wave after wave of guards after them. 

It had seemed as if it would end for a time, but then they were ambushed and frozen in stone. Yoshimitsu shook his head. Enough dwelling on the past. 
"So these alicorns just LEFT their stuff out here? That's just... careless, really." Yoshimitsu nodded. "Yes, it kind of is. Then again, with this ravine here, it's quite hard to get to if you can't fly." Malideus looked at the ravine. "How are we going to cross it then?" For answer, Yoshimitsu grinned.

"No. No no no no no no NO." Yoshimitsu glared at him.
"What's wrong with it?" Malideus shook his head. "I am Malideus, the scourge of the ponies, and I am NOT going to cross over this ravine on piggyback while you make a leap of faith and I scream in terror while you run up the opposite wall of the ravine. I have my dignity, and I am NOT doing it." Yoshimitsu shrugged.
"Suit yourself." With that, he started spinning his sword over his head, flying over the ravine slowly, but surely. Malideus stared at him. "..." The Fat Friar just laughed. 
"It's alright." They took a moment to look at the castle, then the Fat Friar beckoned him. "Come here, oh Scourge of Ponykind; there's a bridge a short walk thataways." Malideus threw his hands up in the air. "See, Yoshimitsu? That's why you wait out things, not do the most insane thing you can think of!" With that last parting jab, he stomped over to the bridge, muttering about 'insane mechanised ninjas.' The Fat Friar, after a moment of silence, followed. 

Darth Vulcan admired the place. It looked evil, imposing and it had location coming out of its ears. Perfect for them. beside him, Keith looked at it in awe. "It looks pretty damn evil, ain't it?" Darth Vulcan nodded his assent.
"Indeed. Looks like we have a new-" they were interrupted when they heard the clanking of a full suit of armour coming up.

Dullahan looked at the group of humans here in surprise. A man cosplaying as Solaire, another cosplaying Yoshimitsu, some normal dude, an evil sorcerer who had whipped out a staff and held it in front of him, Metal Darth Vader and a monk... 
With his shield. 
He knew that he hadn't been sensing things wrong. His shield was definitely here.
He tromped over to the monk, who shied back slightly. He spoke, deciding to ask first before using force. It was pretty hard to be intimidating though- the monk was three inches taller than him.
"Excuse me, but that's my shield you're holding." The monk glanced at it. 
"Is it? Oh, I'm sorry about that. I stole it from the Canterlot Archives; it was exceedingly difficult to steal. Something about it spoke to me; perhaps power calls to power." 
"Well, you have held onto it for me, but I would like it back now." 
The monk looked at him. "Oh, here it is. It's a bit too heavy for me to properly wield, after all." He offered it to Dullahan, who took it in his left hand. He felt the power flow through him and he knew, had he actually had a head, that he would have been grinning like a maniac. "Thank you."

The Choten watched these new humans warily. He didn't know who they were or what their motivations were, and that fact was quite scary. His ring glowed, and he felt slightly calmer. Beside him, the Sisters Grim seemed a bit scared. They'd hidden their eyes about their person, which was a good thing; he didn't want them to scare these newcomers. He approached the sorcerer one warily, as he seemed to be the least threatening. Oh, he was armed and seemed willing to attack at a moments notice, but his arms were too skinny and that staff seemed to just be made of wood, so he couldn't do much other than break a few bones.
"Need a hand?" The man slowly lowered his staff and watched him warily. 
"Who are you, blondie? I am Malideus, Scourge of Ponykind, and I am NOT intimidated by your suit!"  The Choten laughed at that. "You can call me The Choten." 

The Sisters Grim hung back from the others, watching. "Who are these people..." The tall, greenish one stepped forwards, hand outstretched. They looked down on him. "Hello. I am Yoshimitsu." The distorted voice screeched through their eardrums like a saw through flesh. Elizabeth hesitantly put a hand out. "...Nice to meet you." He grasped her hand and cheerfully pumped it up and down. "Splendid! Most excellent! Now, shall we enter the castle together, my dears?" Victoria raised an eyebrow behind her mask. "Are you trying to hit on us?" Yoshimitsu nodded. "Yes. Yes I am. Either that or I've been in a stone closet for a thousand years, and I've just come out."


Everfree Castle Interior.


Darth Vulcan sniffed the air of the castle. It smelled old and mildewy. "What we have here, guys, is a real fixer-upper." He joked, but the ancient quality of the castle overwhelmed him. He nudged a suit of old armour distractedly. It fell over with a loud clang and everybody turned round to stare at him. "...What?" They said nothing. 

Eventually, they came into a hall. Nick looked around, removing his beanie and wiping the sweat off of his brow. "Phew, it's nice to finally find a place with seats." Darth Vulcan nodded; he'd never exercised very stringently before he'd left and he wasn't planning to now. Solaire and Yoshimitsu didn't seem to be affected by walking for hours. The Fat Friar sat down, wiping his brow. "How on earth aren't you two very tired out?" In unison, they said: "Running." The Fat Friar nodded sagely. "Ah so."

Darth Vulcan looked out over the small group of humans here. Since nobody seemed to be confident, he stood up and spoke.
"Okay, right... so we have an animate suit of armour, a knight, some fat dude dressed as a monk, some mechanical ninja, an evil sorcerer warrior, twin sisters in skull masks, a normal guy, a blonde in a suit and me, the totally metal Darth Vader guy. Alright, we're getting somewhere. Now, before we start trying to get back home again and forgetting about this miserable chapter of our lives, does anybody have any questions?" His gravelly, villainy voice boomed through the small group. Said 'mechanical ninja' stood up. 

"Yeah, I just realised something. Where's Tobi?" Nobody seemed to register that. He elaborated. "You know, six foot tall, spiky black hair, orange swirly mask with one eyehole? Long black coat with red cloud designs?" The group, as a whole, murmured no. He sagged. "Great. Who wants to help me find the guy before he gets himself into trouble?" Darth Vulcan snorted. "That guy who was hella annoying? I'm sure that he won't annoy anything TOO dangerous." Just then, said human quickly ran into the meeting area, running  as if the hounds of hell were after him. He stopped and stared at the group.

"Wow, there're a lot of people here." He then turned to Yoshimitsu. "Sempai, something big's coming our way!" Yoshimitsu rubbed his eyes. "I  knew it. Goddamn it, I knew it. Alright, Tobi, what the fuck did you do this ti-" With a crash, the door slammed through, and stepping into their midst was a gigantic demon. It stood ten feet tall, dwarfing every human there. It wore black armour decorated with skulls, which seemed to stare into everybody's soul. Its head was elongated, covered in a black helmet that was similarly decorated with skulls. Its cape of skulls billowed out behind it, and its yellow eyes were devoid of anything resembling pity, remorse, or kindness. It also had a joint the size of God shoved up its nose. The monstrous demon focused on Tobi, and in an echoing voice, spake thus:
"I am going to destroy you, you little shit!" Tobi screamed and ran, demon following him.
"I'M SORRY! DON'T KILL ME!" The demon swung a mighty arm in his general direction, but Tobi phased through the blow and watched it crash into the opposite wall. He immediately clasped his hands together, and tree roots snagged the demon's arms, tightening around them as he tried to pull free.

Seeing this seemed to snap the other humans out of inaction. The Fat Friar slammed the beast with a fireball, which barely singed the huge demon. It growled in annoyance, before being hit by a blast of lightning that emanated from the sword of Dullahan.
"Fulminous Strike." The confident note in his telepathic voice wasn't well founded, as he was soon punched across the room, impacting with the wall on the opposite side. He slumped, the demon's fist having dented his chest plate.
"...Okay, give me ten minutes and this fucker's dead." He focused, but the demon had heard that.
"Can't let you do that!" With that, the huge demon attacked, but-
"Element swap, Venus! Retreat!"
-Dullahan teleported away to places unknown. The huge demon grunted, before it was hit by a shadowy arrow. It looked at the black projectile in annoyance. Yoshimitsu took the time to strafe past with his glowing green sword, cutting at the armour but only causing a minor scratch, that the Skulltaker ignored in favour of the arrow that dissipated off of his chest plate.
"You thought THIS would harm me?" Victoria grinned, shadowy bow still in hand. 
"No, not really... but this one will!" She loosed another arrow, spiralling towards the beasts' head...
Only for it to just stick on the skin, where it pulled it out after a moment. Victoria gaped in shock. 
"FOOLS! YOU THINK THAT YOU CAN BEST U'ZHUHL THE SKULLTAKER WITH A BOW AND ARROW?!" It bellowed, shaking the very foundations of the castle.

Shunk.
The Skulltaker was shocked that something had managed to penetrate his armour. He looked at the projectile- a wooden spike with a faintly distorted aura about it. U'Zhuhl stared at it in shock and confusion.
"What the...?" He roared in pain as it suddenly branched out, lacerating his gut from the inside. Tobi panted. "Alright, now for the finale! WOOD RELEASE: WOODEN STOCKS!" Wood sprouted from the floor, forming stocks around the beasts arms and legs, binding it still. It struggled, but as it kept struggling, the wood just kept regrowing, and his struggles grew weaker. Eventually, U'Zhuhl was incapacitated, though still struggling. Yoshimitsu looked at it. "Now would be the perfect time to end this creature's life." He drew his sword, which glowed with a green light.

"No." Everybody stared at The Choten and Malideus, who had avoided the fight. Malideus spoke next. "Do none of you recognise the name that it just said?" At the general shaking heads, Malideus face palmed. "Honestly, that thing is from Warhammer 40k. It's a miracle that your... thingie was even able to pierce it!" Yoshimitsu turned to him indignantly.
"I will have you know that Wind Release is capable of cutting on the cellular level. Plus, that was a damn sharp stick in the first place." Tobi nodded, proudly. Darth Vulcan shook his head. "Regardless, he's a valuable ally. I propose that we befriend this one; he'll be a valuable ally." U'Zuhl chuckled. "You believe that you can order ME around? I am U'Zuhl, the Skulltaker-" 

The Choten interrupted. "-Who was defeated by the guy who shoved a joint up your nose." U'Zuhl grunted in annoyance. "HE CHEATED! He had help from his friend, the green one." Yoshimitsu nodded. "Considering that your armour withstood one of my sword blows with only a minor scratch, I'd say that our teamwork was a good idea." Darth Vulcan clapped his hands together. "Yes. U'zuhl, may I assume that you were originally human?" The huge demon looked at him. "Damn right I am. I used to be human, then this Alicorn Amulet thingy comes through my television. I then get into my U'zuhl costume and fall into a pit of fucking rainbows. Now, I'm ten feet tall and sound like an echoing demon. Funny what life does to you." Darth Vulcan narrowed his eyes. "No, that's not the Alicorn Amulet. What I have bolted to my armour is the Alicorn Amulet." U'Zuhl looked at it. "Could I have a mirror, please? It's hanging between my horns." Tobi concentrated, and a mirror warped into existence in his hand. He held it up, and the demon squinted at his reflection. "...A fucking CHAOS STAR?! My day just got a whole lot more badass." Tobi nodded. "So, I'm sorry about the whole 'joint in the nose thing.' Are you prepared to let bygones be bygones, man?" The demon glared at him. "SORRY?! YOU SHOVE A JOINT THE SIZE OF GOD UP MY NOSE, AND YOU SAY SORRY?!" He fumed for a while, and Tobi scuttled away from him. Then, the demon grinned. "APOLOGY ACCEPTED!"

The roar that came from his mouth bowled Tobi over. He then rose up, dusting himself off. "Alright, I'm letting you out of the stocks now. But Yoshimitsu and I can put you back in them if we need to." With that, he flicked his fingers into positions, and the stocks opened, allowing the demon to rise to his full height. He glared at Tobi, then grudgingly let the matter drop; he wasn't used to his body yet. Darth Vulcan looked over the group, then realised an important question that nobody seemed to have thought of. "Excellent. Now then, does this place have plumbing? Because I believe that I am going to need a toilet soon." Solaire shook his head. "There's a garderobe designed for Alicorns, but mostly there's a pit." Darth Vulcan shook his head. "I am NOT crapping in a GODDAMN PIT!" Tobi tapped his chin in thought. "Well, we do know one guy who could build plumbing..." He trailed off. Darth Vulcan was hooked. He leaned forwards."WHO." Tobi thought, then clicked his fingers. "Invention-sempai."


Canterlot Caves.


Invention felt a shiver run down his spine, and he felt cold. Somewhere, somebody had doom written for him, and it certainly wasn't Celestia; she was too nice for that. Beside him, Abyss had noticed his sudden shock. "What's wrong with you?" He shook his head; he was most certainly overreacting. "It's probably nothing. It might be Tobi, though..." He shuddered at the memory of the man. Abyss looked at that shudder. "Friend of yours?" 
Invention shook his head. "Oh, god no. I met him while I was imprisoned in stone. He was completely mad, but he did talk to everybody. Unfortunately, that insanity got in the way of just about anything rational. He was a stoner of the highest degree, and a Narutard of considerable knowledge." He shuddered. "Thank God he doesn't know where to find me." 


Everfree Castle.


"Where is this Invention?"
"Oh, Vulcan-kohai, I think that he is in the Canterlot Cave System. He told us about his home there; it's in one of the train tunnels!" Darth Vulcan nodded, then paused. "Kohai?" Tobi nodded. "Yes. You see, I'm technically over a thousand years older than you are, so you are my inferior. My kohai, in other words. I am your superior, or sempai." Darth Vulcan just stared. "Whatever. Now, find him and get him to do plumbing for us-" Yoshimitsu interrupted him. "Sorry, Vulcan, but Invention won't do anything without being paid for it. That's his way." Darth Vulcan growled. "Fine. We find money, we give him a lot, and we pay him. Any ideas on where to find money?" 

Dullahan spoke up this time. "Vulcan, I do believe that I have a suggestion. I've been looking around, and I've discovered something interesting; there's a dragon nearby, with a large hoard of gold and jewels." Malideus looked at the suit of armour. "Was it female and purple?" The armour clinked and clanked for a bit.
"No, it was green and male. Also very big; I was almost added to its hoard, but I escaped." Darth Vulcan glared at the other humans. "You heard the armour, we have a dragon to kill."