"But... I don't understand," Roseluck wailed. "I... all I wanted was for us to go out for lunch this Hearts and Hooves Day..."
Kitted out in full regalia to show that I meant business, I affixed the mare with a stone-cold gaze, my hazel eyes little more than hardened chips of ice as I intoned, "You mares have no concept of personal space. I have no interest in mares - especially ones who not only blatantly throw themselves at me, but also think they can enter my Weyr without permission!" My last words were as the voice of an army Drill Instructor - cracking across the mare like a whip.
A frightened scream escaping her, the poor mare turned and galloped back to Ponyville as if Discord himself were after her, dropping her box of chocolates in the process; a box I wouldn't have accepted anyway. No sooner had she gone than a Probe swiftly scooped up the box of now ruined chocolates for disposal as I turned and stalked back into the Weyr, the mighty Gates of Dawn slamming closed behind me with a massive BOOM.
Swiftly making my way back up to the main room, I collapsed upon the old leather sofa within, a weary groan escaping me as I rested my head atop my hooves and then blanketed my head with teal-feathered wings, a weary groan escaping me. 'Ugh...' I thought, a gusty sigh escaping my nose, 'why can't they leave me alone...?' No sooner had I thought this than the Dragon Weyr was pinging me again with another alert: there was another pony at the Gates.
"Urrrgggh!" I growled. "Who is it this time? I swear by Adun if it's Twilight again, I'm going to physically hurt that mare; I'll buck her into the Everfree..." Immediately, the construct's negation filled my thoughts, followed by an image from the external camera above the Gates. The mare at the Gates, thankfully, was Lyra. "Has she been followed?" I asked. Negation was the Weyr's reply and at this, I breathed a sigh of relief
The last time she'd visited, a small herd of mares had attempted to follow the poor unicorn inside, all wanting to get a look at the 'new stallion' in town. Lyra herself - coupled with low-powered warning shots from multiple Photon Cannons - had dissuaded them from trying again. Heaving another world-weary sigh, I groaned, "Let her in..." Shortly thereafter I heard the sound of the transport rings activating; then there came the sound of muffled hoofsteps as Lyra Heartstrings - perhaps the only pony with any common sense - entered the Weyr.
Unlike other mares whom I shall not name, the aquamarine-coated, cyan-maned unicorn didn't immediately rush up to me and invade my space; instead, she performed a gentle half-bow and then waited for me to acknowledge her. When I briefly dipped my head - returning her bow - and then gestured for her to come closer, a weary smile graced her face and she moved to me. No sooner had I shifted to make room for her on the beat up old sofa than she was hopping up onto it, near draping herself over me as she groaned quietly.
"Rough day?" I grunted.
"*Mumble-mumble*... Stallions... *mumble-mumble-frrghrrn...*" was her barely audible reply.
"You too, huh?" I stated.
Lyra whimpered.
"Fuck Hearts and Hooves day..." I groaned. Poor Lyra huffed softly in agreement. She's gotten the same treatment from stallions that I kept getting from other mares; they kept badgering her to participate in Hearts and Hooves day activities, to go out with them, etc. when all she really wanted to do was hole up in her room and write music. It'd been the same with me and mares but worse; they kept hassling me in small herds, trying to ply me with all manner of chocolates, trying to get inside the Weyr, and generally being nuisances as they eyed me like I was a piece of meat or a breeding stud.
'Damn you, Celestia. Damn your ponification spell. Damn you to the ninth level of Tartarus!' I raged internally.
Oh, I hated Hearts and Hooves Day...