The Moon Isn't All Bad

by Ze Guest


4: 300 Stallions

Now, while fighting with musket was a fun game, Luna found herself liking the swords. She just dominated with them. She wanted to do it again. She also wanted a change in enemies. The lobsters were a good idea, true, but she felt she needed a change. Maybe Persian cats? No, too fluffy and cute. She wouldn't want to slaughter them. What about Persian Tigers? Yes! That would certainly work.

Luna and Hickory together went out to find a good spot for battle. It was tedious work, indeed, but they found the perfect spot. A cliff. Narrow and steep. A perfect and dramatic scene for close combat. Now was the time to make the tigers. She pranced up to a plateau which was quite large. Seemed like the size of Manehattan. She lit up her horn and went to work. She started wondering, though, what would the circumstances be? She had a lot of fun with the battles while outnumbered.

Now that she was going to be outnumbered yet again, by how much? Last time, at the battle of New Apogeeans, she was outnumbered 7 to 4. Maybe she should make the stakes higher. 3 to 10! No! Even better, 0.3 to 10! Was this idea due to insanity? Probably. But she wanted to do it.

"So what do you think?" Luna asked Hickory. A cheesy smile stretched across her face. It made her feel like a filly again. (Oh, what a long lost thought that was.)

Hickory thought that Luna was just downright insane. The odds were horrible. He wondered if Luna had her head straight. Yes, it was a fact that he led an army outnumbered. But even those odds were somewhat reasonable. Hickory used the best of his ability to explain this. Luna got only the basis of it. She was insane.

"It's only a game!" Luna reminded Hickory. "Everything will be fine in the end!"

Hickory rolled his eyes. Yes, though. I was just a game. It was hard to forget that. He shook a bad memory from his head. He nodded. Just a game... right. He went to work. Thinking of strategies to use against the Persian Tigers. Luna was going to build them, though. All ten thousand of them. Hickory turned to look at Luna for one second. He nearly fell over when he saw that Luna was already done!

"Any strategy that could be put to good use?" Luna asked.

Hickory put a hoof on his face and shook his head. He went back to thinking of good ideas. If they were going to be outnumbered a thousand to one, he might have an idea. It was a good idea that might work. He explained to Luna. She liked it. She liked it a lot.

Luna stood before her three hundred stallions. She had a good idea for a little pep-talk before the fighting. But it was no use. Stupid gasless space. Ten thousand tigers was an overwhelming number but she knew that they have a chance. After Hickory's strategy. Perfect. It almost seemed familiar for some reason. But no matter. Not even her sister could think of such a plan of deception.

She lifted her sword and shield. It was time to move. She started walking and the rest followed. Hickory was beside Luna. She smiled at him and he forced a smile back. It felt as if they had been walking for minuets! Because they were, when they came to a halt. What blocked their path, was the tigers. Their teeth gritted and their defense strong.

Hickory and Luna looked at each other. Both wondering how this would go. Luna, with her sword and shield, charged at the tigers along with the rest of her army. She lifted her sword. Before a tiger could attack, she lowered and its head went the opposite direction of the body from which it once belonged.

Another came to her, it was going to claw her but Luna swung her shield and struck the tiger., leaving quite a large opening in his neck. More tigers. No match for Luna. No more limbs either. They were cutting through the tiger's defenses like butter. And yes, the melted butter you dip your lobsters into. (Just couldn't help myself.)

But just because Luna's army was beating the complete crud out of the tigers, didn't mean they were not outnumbered. The tigers started to fight back. Luna and Hickory caught eyes with each other. Hickory had a smug smile on his face. Luna returned the smile. Hickory ran back and ordered the army to retreat. They all fell back.

Luna followed and, to her luck, so did the tigers. Hickory was in front of the fleet. A tiger pounced on Luna and brought her to the ground. Luckily, Hickory saw this. The perfect time to execute the plan. He skidded to a stop and the army turned around to fight again. As for Luna and the tiger, he lifted his paw for the kill until he looked up. They were coming back?

A stallion rose his sword and struck the tiger down. He helped Luna back up and before she could say anything, he ran back into the fight. Within the confusion, Luna and Hickory's army almost seemed to walk right through the tigers. As if in defeat, the tigers retreated. The amount of casualties was too much for the time being.

That night was no time to relax. They practiced and exercised and prepared for the next battle. Which would not be too far away. Luna fast forwarded to the next day. She didn't want to wait for the next battle. She just wanted to play. The army moved forward. The tigers were all set. They waiting for them. Before fighting began, the leader stepped up. He wanted a personal talk with Luna. Purxes was not interested in killing Luna. Not yet. He appreciated her strength and wanted it.

He so suavely told her his interest in her. How they could simply rule the moon together. With her strength and his integrity. They would be simply unstoppable. "No." Luna said sternly. "I'll never live a day on your side. I'll die before then."

Purxes wasn't very pleased with her conduct. He warned her that he could take both her power and her life ever so quickly. Luna just smirked. "Come and take it." she said.

He didn't answer. He angrily walked beak behind his lines. He ordered an attack. Tigers were charging at lightning speed. So simplistic. Just the same strategy as yesterday. Luna charged head first into the fight. A tiger stood in her way. Well, he did. Now he just fell into a small pile of dust. Nothing significant.

This fight ended much the same way. They pretended to retreat and turned back at the last second The difference that was made was that Hickory was somehow able to corner a large amount of tigers. They had no wall to back up against. It was just a deep hole they stood behind. Hundreds of feet below finally laid what ne could call ground. So far down.

Luna stepped forward. The tigers tied to fight back, but the stallions had better, longer weapons. All the tigers had were their paws. A few archers. Their arrow count was quite low, though. Luna, along with the rest of her deadly army pushed the tigers closer to the void that was behind them. Tigers fell down, down, down. Deeper and deeper. Didn't matter if they landed on their feet this time. The last few tigers fell to their imminent death. Luna stumbled and fell over, along with the tigers.

Hickory watched as Luna fell, deeper. She was laughing, though. She softly hit the ground. Leaving a slight imprint of herself on the tiger's remains. Once again, they forced the tigers to run.

Luna was a little tired out by the fighting and fun and decided to take a nap. Luna didn't quite know how dangerous that nap would be, though.

Now, this stallion didn't really have a name. He did, however, think Luna was bat crap insane. Just look at him. Let's see, inattentive, impatient, a glazed look in the eye. He has a I really wish Luna wasn't so stupid and insane bottom. There's a name we have for soldiers like these, but we'll just call him-Squidward.

Now, this Squidward didn't want to fight the tigers any longer. He knew he would die eventually. And death was not something he was looking forward to. He stood before Purxes. Squidward knew this area well for some reason. Probably for the convenience of the plot. And he knew that there was a long road along the battlefield. He told Purxes that he could use this road to his advantage. It was on high ground o they would have all the advantages. They could win with a single arrow shower.

Purxes sat back in his throne and smiled. He waved his paw in the air and requested a gift for the stallion who so boldly gave away such useful information. Two cougars walked up to Squidward. Purxes said they were now his. He could do with them as he pleased. Squidward led the cougars to a room where they could finally be alone. Purxes gathered all of his archers. Because tomorrow was going to be victorious.

The next day, or more like after Luna's nap, Purxes was alone. He was once again here to offer a spot next to his throne for Luna. He told Luna that there was no way out of this. It was either join him, or simply die. Luna didn't even think. "No."

As if on cue, archers came up on the sides of them and the ones over on the trail raised their bows. Once gain, Purxes asked the question he could only wish Luna would finally agree to. Luna looked up at the archers. Their arrows pinged at her and her army. Now, teaming up with Purxes seemed flattering. She stood silent as the archers aimed at her head. This was an offer she couldn't refuse... She refused.

The archers let loose. Time froze. The Arrows were suspended in the air. They soon just crumbled up and fell to the ground. Along with Purxes, the archers and the army. Sword play was fun indeed. Even though she had lost the battle. The Battle was still perfect in her eyes. They all were. And one thing Luna was fond of, was perfection.