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// 7: "Don't Even Think About It!" 
// Story: Prompt-A-Day Collection 
// by Admiral Biscuit 
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"Don't even think about it...!"

“How can I not?”

My girlfriend glared back at me.  Well, maybe girlfriend is the wrong term to use.  I guess fillyfriend would be right—at least, now.

We were both bronies.  Not the weirdly obsessed kind, who had a virtual army of MLP ponies in their bedroom, or the kind who lurked around fanfiction sites.  Sure, I had a Derpy toy—who doesn’t want one of those?—but that was as far as it went.  We watched the show, we occasionally looked at nice, SFW pictures on Equestria Daily, and speculated on whether Twilight would lose some of her adorkableness now that she was an alicorn.  I’m pleased to say that the season premier showed that she kept it all.  

Oh, and I might as well admit that I had—on some occasions—viewed a bit of clop.  Just a teeny bit.  A few images here and there.  At first, it had been an accident (damn you, Google).  Still, it wasn’t like I secretly wanted to . . . well, you know.  With a pony.  

Why would I?  I had a cute girlfriend who also liked ponies.  What more could a boy want?  

Well, maybe a little action.  Something more than kisses and hugs, if you know what I mean.

Still, it was mostly good.  Who wouldn’t want to cuddle with a cute blonde in front of a TV?  Who wouldn’t be envious that she hugged me tightly during the Nightmare Moon flashback?  Or that she’d baked cookies beforehand?  Yup, my life was pretty much perfect.

And then we fell through the portal.  God, you’d think someone would have put caution tape around it, or something.

I should have known from Equestria Girls that anyone going through the portal into Equestria is going to turn into a pony.  Both Twilight and Sunset Shimmer were proof of the opposite reaction, anyway.


•        •        •


As soon as I managed to get to my feet—sorry, hooves—I looked around in wonder.  I’d like to say that I figured out how to stand pretty quickly, but that would be a lie.  It’s nothing like crawling; for starters, it seemed like half the joints in my arms and legs bent the wrong way.  Just standing up was a major production.

A feminine yelp next to me got my attention.  It seemed that I wasn’t the only one who’d gone through the portal.  My girl was also a pony, now, and she was having just as much trouble as I’d been having getting to her hooves.

Naturally, being the gentleman—gentlepony—that I am, I helped her to her hooves, before pointing off towards the Crystal Castle.  “I hope that Princess Cadance is really there, and I hope that she can really help us.  And I hope that they speak English.”

“I just hope that they’ve got something warm.  Are you chilly?  I feel a little drafty.”  She took a couple of hesitant steps forward and froze.  Both of us looked at each other for a moment, wide-eyed.  I glanced down under my chest, then back up at her.

She snapped her tail down, but it was too late.  The damage had been done.  I looked at her hopefully.  “Come on, we’re natives now.  Show a little . . . uh, plot.”  I reached a hoof towards her.