For Whom The Belle Tolls
Chapter 8
Applejack waited patiently, sitting close with her friend in the dark hospital room. The sound of Rarity’s breathing could be heard almost as loud as Dash’s. The sight of that oxygen mask had really scared the unicorn. It had scared her as well. Every once in a while Applejack would tilt her head to look down upon her friend who had her head resting softly on her shoulder. Her eyes darted around under her eyelids, and sometimes she would squeeze them shut tightly. The farm pony kept her eye on the clock most of the time, listening to the rhythmic sounds of beeps, ticks, and breathing. She looked down to Rarity again after two hours. Her mouth hung open slightly, a little strand of drool falling onto her lap. Applejack wiped Rarity’s mouth, though it remained open. She was confident the lack of sleep had finally bested her friend.
The orange mare lifted a hoof up to slide her hat a little further down her forehead, hiding her eyes. She let her tired eyes close, though she had no intention of sleeping. She’d made a promise, and honestly, despite her exhaustion, she doubted she would ever sleep again after this hospital trip. Instead, Applejack let a tear fall, felt the little watery droplet slide slowly down her cheek. It felt cool and refreshing upon her face. Another followed the first, then another, and another. She kept her breath steady so as not to wake the pony resting on her shoulder, and she made no noise. It was only tears. They ran rampant down her face as she allowed herself a moment to let out some of her anguish. It felt good to finally let herself cry, but it still didn’t near the release she needed. The only thing that could ever bring her release would be the sight of Rainbow walking out of this hospital, but even then, she couldn’t imagine a future in which she would ever forgive herself.
Applejack couldn’t tell how long she cried for, but eventually she ran out of tears to let fall. She lifted her hat and wiped her eyes, which she had no doubt were red as the coals of a fire. Her face was absolutely soaked, many of her tears traveling down to her midsection. She noticed with a bit of horror that some of them had even fallen upon Rarity. She wiped the unicorn’s forehead gently before cleaning herself up. She wished she could go into the bathroom and wash herself off, but moving might disturb Rarity, which was the last thing she felt like doing right now. She cleaned herself up as best as she could with her hooves, and waited until morning. It came much faster then she had anticipated.
Rarity opened her eyes only moments after the first few rays of sunshine came in through the naked windows. Applejack felt her head shift around a bit on her shoulder. She let out a large yawn, and rubbed her closed eyes. When they opened and adjusted to the light of the room, Applejack heard the unicorn sigh.
“I had hoped it was just a nightmare.” She muttered, almost inaudibly. Once Rarity was fully awake, Applejack got up from the chair to give her some breathing room.
“So do Ah.” Applejack stated simply. “You feelin’ alright Rarity?”
“As well as I can feel. Thank you Applejack.”
“You’re welcome.”
“No, I meant really thank you. You’ve been so patient and considerate towards me. I was so distressed I never got a chance to state my gratitude.”
“It’s alright Rarity. It’s… the least Ah can do. Thank you for tellin’ me the truth.” Applejack cast her gaze to the comatose pegasus.
Sisters
It made a lot of sense, and the emotion with which Rarity explained herself was more than enough to convince her of the unicorn’s honesty. But still, it was difficult to believe. Rarity also got up from the chair, and made her way to her kin. She held Rainbow’s good hoof in her own, while Applejack stood silently, and awkwardly.
“Applejack,” Rarity spoke suddenly, breaking a long silence. “Do you think she’ll pull through?”
The way she spoke was practically emotionless. It was the first time anypony had dared to ask the question out loud, though in their own minds, it was the only question that mattered. Applejack told the white mare the same thing she’d told herself over and over.
“Rainbow Dash is as tough as they come. If anypony can pull through from this, it’d be her.”
It was the only grain of truth she could offer, unwilling to stand on either side of the fence, out of fear. Rarity nodded silently. Applejack watched the two sisters for a moment. She wished more than ever that she could have left well enough alone. It felt like years ago that she actually gave half a damn whether or not the two where in love. She thought of al the time she’d butted in on the two of them while they spent time together. It was innocent, but thinking back, it was time they were spending as a family. And as horrible as the prospect was, that time together may have been running short.
Applejack winced. It hurt to think about such a grim prospect. She cast her eye to the clock. It was almost seven. The hospital would be letting visitors in soon. Applejack returned to the chair. All three of the mares were in the same places they were last night, but now the air felt a lot more depressing. It pained Applejack to think about how foolish she’d been. Not just for the accident, but for refusing to give her proper apology until she could be alone with the friend she’d almost killed. Now she may never get that chance.
The instant the clock struck seven o’clock, Applejack stood up. She needed to get out, even if only for a few seconds, else the guilt weighing down on her might’ve crushed her completely.
“Hey Rarity, do you want anything to eat? Ah’m just gonna get out and stretch my legs for a minute or two.” If she was leaving the room for a bit, she may as well make herself useful. The hospital had a few places for visitors to buy food, so she wouldn’t have to go too far anyway. And if she promised to get Rarity some breakfast, she would assuredly return.
“Oh… yes please.”
“You want anything in particular?”
“No, just whatever you can find, you know what I like.” She didn’t look up.
Applejack nodded silently. She opened the door and walked into the empty hallways. Two minutes later, she returned with a carton of hay fries. They didn’t sell too much at the hospital, but she knew fries were a guilty pleasure for Rarity. She had expected to see the rest of the girls on their way, wanting to come visit as soon as possible, but she didn’t see any of them. She wondered who would have to tell them the bad news. Hopefully the doctor would be in so neither she nor Rarity had to explain Rainbow’s deteriorating condition.
When she came back into the room, Rarity still hadn’t moved. Applejack came up beside her, and sat herself down on the floor, resting her back on the hard metal of Dash’s hospital bed. She held up the box to Rarity. Her effort was rewarded with a small smile, which was more than enough payment for the overpriced fries. Applejack picked at the food with her friend. She had never been a big fan of fries, but her hunger won her over. Once the box lay empty except for the grease that pooled in the corner, she got up to put the box on the table.
As she made her way across the room, she heard a knock on the door. She let out a sigh. She wanted so badly to have the company of her friends again, but she dreaded having to tell them about Rainbow. Though as she shuffled to the door, the knocking became almost frantic. Her first thought was that it was the doctor, with urgent news to share with them. Her shuffle turned to a swift trot. She pulled the door open, and was surprise to see Rarity’s other sister. She was breathing heavily.
“Hey Applejack.” She breathed before running between the orange mare’s legs to get to her big sister.
“Rarity!” She said frantically. “Rarity, I’m sorry!” She jumped on the white unicorn and held her tightly. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to, it slipped out. They asked me and it slipped out.”
“Sweetie Belle, what ever are you talking about?” Rarity asked her sibling, obviously confused.
“I told them. They know. They’re coming right now.” The little filly burst into tears, repeating that she was sorry. Rarity’s face became even gaunter upon hearing that news. Applejack was confused for a moment, but the look on her friends face clued her in. Their parents were coming. Applejack touched the brim of her hat, and set it a little tighter upon her head. Rarity continued to hold her sister. The filly babbled out endless sorry’s with her little head buried in her chest, while Rarity tried to comfort the upset little unicorn.
Both of the mares looked towards the still open door. They could hear hoofsteps echoing down the hallway. Applejack realized with a start that her right hoof was trembling. She held it steady. She locked eyes with Rarity, unsure of what to do. Neither pony knew what would happen. Applejack brought herself closer to Rainbow. She didn’t know what else to do.
Two shadows came into sight upon the floor, followed closely by their owners. Rarity’s parents entered the room. It was odd to seem them both unclothed, bare of their usual embarrassing attire about which Rarity would complain endlessly.
“Hey there Rarity.” Her father said. Applejacks ear twitched. His tone was dangerous and his eyes were cold. He seemed almost a completely different stallion. “What’s going on in here?” Rarity’s mother looked to Rainbow’s body with wet eyes, though she dared not move with her husband there.
“Nothing that concerns you, father.” She spat out the last word.
“Oh come now, this is a family matter, and we’re all part of the family aren’t we?”
Applejack was speechless.
She never heard Rarity’s dad speak so threateningly. Rarity’s eyes were terrified, and Applejack was shocked yet again by her next words.
“Applejack, could you leave us for a moment?” She said, not taking her eyes off her dad.
“Are you sure about that Rarity?” The farm pony asked, concerned.
“Yes thank you.” Applejack wished she could stay, it didn’t feel right to leave her with that fiend, but she had no intention of defying her friend. This was her fight, she knew best. Rarity’s dad shot her a look as she passed, and Applejack immediately stopped. She brought her muzzle closer to the stallion, until her mouth was almost in his ear. Then she spoke quietly.
“If you lay a hoof on any of them, Ah’ll break your neck myself.” She pulled the brim of her hat down to make a point.
“Ah’ll be right outside Rarity, call if you need anything.” She sauntered out the door making sure to close it shut behind her.
“What are you doing here father?” Rarity asked.
“Well I should ask you the same thing Rarity.”
“She’s my sister, and she’s hurt. I need to be at her side.”
“She’s not your sister. She never was.”
“Rainbow Dash is just as akin to me as Sweetie. I love them both with all my heart.”
“Don’t you dare put your little sister on the same level as her.” He gestured to Rainbow, still sleeping, and silent. “Sweetie Belle, come here.” The stallion said with a fooling smile. The little filly made to go to him, but Rarity held her firmly.
“Little one, I think it would be best if you stayed with me.” Sweetie looked up to her sister confused
“Oh don’t be ridiculous Rarity. Sweetie, come over here.”
“Sweetie Belle, please stay here.”
“Sweetie Belle, now.” He growled. Rarity could tell from her sister’s reaction that she’d never once heard that voice come from him. But Rarity had, long ago. No matter how hard she covered her ears, his taunting voice still got through. It was the voice he would use when he beat Dash. Sweetie Belle buried her face in her big sisters shoulder. Rarity felt wretched for having to make the filly choose like that, but she had to. It was for her safety. Her father was displeased.
“Why do you insist on defying me, for her?
“Because she’s my sister!” Rarity said. “We’re family, we look out for one another. But you never understood that, all you knew was cruelty. I can’t even fathom how you could’ve hated a filly so innocent as Rainbow.”
“That pegasus was a stain upon our family. And I would appreciate it if you would quit referring to her as your sister.”
“I don’t care what you would appreciate!” Rarity screamed. Sweetie’s sobs became louder and heavier. Rarity could feel her warm tears soaking into her shoulder. She held her sister a little tighter. “I would appreciate not losing countless hours of sleep to the sounds of her cries! I would appreciate spending my childhood with a sister who didn’t fear for her own life! I would appreciate not having to take on the role of her caretaker, because you couldn’t stand to look at her!” Rarity continued to shout. Her mother began to cry. “I love her. And I loved you once too. Can you even imagine what it’s like to watch your own father beat your sister senseless, for no other reason than being born different than you would have preferred.” Rarity felt her eyes getting watery, but she would not show weaknes in front of her father. This time, she would stand up for her twin.
“I am your father! You will not speak to me that way!”
“Fathers are supposed to love their children! But you never felt an ounce of love for her. To this day I have nightmare about all that you did to her. And the fact that a monster like you would ever love me, or somepony as beautiful and pure as Sweetie Belle, makes me sick!”
Her father’s face reddened with anger. Rarity truly began to feel nauseated. Her father felt no remorse, he didn’t see any of his actions as ever being wrong. All he saw were two disobedient daughters who spoke nonsense.
“Rarity, I am losing my patience. I came here to see if you truly rekindled her relationship with her. I can’t believe you would go back after giving her away like that.”
“How dare you speak as though you stand upon the moral high ground?! Mother and I saved her! We helped her escape from the torture you put her through. And saying good bye was one of the most painful thing’s I’ve ever done to this day.”
Her father raised an eyebrow.
“You honestly feel love towards that pegasus don’t you? You would put her before your own family?”
“Rainbow, Sweetie Belle and Mother are the only ponies I can truly call my family now. I don’t know what you are, but you are not my father.” The words felt like a release, as though she had come upon a revelation. As though she had broken free. Her father’s face boiled with rage, while her mother and dear little sister continued to cry. Sweetie was scared and confused. She didn’t know all the pain that had just been recalled in this room. Rarity prayed she never did.
“After all I’ve done for you. For our family. I never would have expected this from you Rarity.” His tone was dangerous, and for a moment the white unicorn contemplated calling for Applejack, when a sudden unexpected noise reached her ears. The constant beeping noise to which she had become so accustomed, became a flat tone. Rarity turned to the monitor in horror. The line was flat.
The unicorn couldn’t think, she couldn’t catch her breath. The sound of Rainbow’s breath against the plastic mask on her face had ceased.
“Applejack.” She muttered almost in audibly. Somewhere far away her little sister was saying something. That she was scared, that she didn’t understand what was happening. But Rarity’s mind had broken. The name, I have to say her name. What was her friend’s name? Who was standing outside? She had just said it a second ago, what was it? She had to remember, she had to call, she needed help. The flat tone of the heart monitor rang in her ears like the bells of hell. Fear and pain welled inside her, she felt as though she were drowning. The name… What was the name? Applejack.
“APPLEJACK!” she screamed, her voice reaching a shrill tone. Faster than she could blink, the door burst open. Applejack’s eyes flashed with rage, followed by sudden shock at the sound she was hearing.
“Help, please help Applejack!” Her entire body trembled as she held her little sister close.
The orange pony galloped the short distance of the room. She shoved her father aside roughly, the stallion fell to a heap upon the floor. She slammed her rugged hoof repeatedly upon the button under Rainbow’s bed, summoning the doctors. Her breath was heavy and fast as she placed her hooves upon the pegasus’ blue chest. Sweetie began to cry as Applejack performed the chest compressions.
“Come on.” She muttered savagely under her breath. “Not today Rainbow, not today.”
Rarity’s mother began to sob, her father looked confused. Rarity held a shaking hoof to her mouth as she watched Applejack push down on her chest. The flat tone never picked up.
“Damn it Rainbow, you are NOT doing this to me today. Please. Please, don’t do this to me.”
Rarity once again found her sisters head buried between her neck and shoulder, and she held the little filly like a lifeline. She coulldn’t take her eyes off what was happening. Her twin sister was fading. After what seemed like an eternity, several doctors came galloping into the room. The surrounded the bed and prepared a plethora of medical equipment. Applejack didn’t stop, she was so focussed, trying so hard. After repeated requests from the doctors, she had to be literally thrown off of the bed by one of them. She curled up on the floor, but now that she was off, she had no intention of disrupting the medical staff. They were their final slim hope. By now her mother had broken down completely, while her father just stared on, with a look of intrigue.
Rarity’s eyes began to brim with tears, from fear and her loss of breath. How to breath? She couldn’t remember that either. But she remembered perfectly how to cry. She watched in terror as Rainbow’s cyan body arced as they shocked her with magical energy. The heart monitor spiked. Then fell flat again. Rarity returned her sisters gesture, nuzzling her shoulder with a wet face. She could no longer bear to look. There was yelling, so much yelling from the doctors, as the sound of crackling energy filled the air, it scared them both. And then suddenly it stopped. Silence. Save for the flat tone of the monitor. Rarity lifted her face up, staring at the doctors. Her mouth hung open. The kind brown stallion raised a shaking hoof and slid the oxygen mask of Dash’s face. The mask hissed as it released the gas into the air. The heartbeat monitor was disconnected, and fell silent.
“Time of death?” He asked flatly, unable to lift his head.
“S-seven eighteen AM.” A nurse said shakily. Rarity’s world suddenly fell dark. Where was the light? She was scared. Rainbow, Rainbow Dash was always there for her when she was scared, she promised she would always be there. But where was she? Where was the light. There were noises, ponies speaking, ponies holding her, but it was too dark.There was no light. Rainbow’s body appeared before her, but it wasn’t the same. She was small, just a filly, younger than Sweetie Belle.
“Please Rarity!” The little Rainbow begged. Her magenta eye’s watery, tears streaming down her soft blue cheeks. “I love you, please don’t go!” She wailed. Rarity tried to answer, tell her she would never leave, but no words came out. Then she disappeared once again fading from existence, the world became black once more. Where was the light? Where was Rainbow Dash?
Applejack went numb. That was what she did during times of tragedy. She caught all the sadness and bottled it up for later. That was what she did, when Granny Smith had told her, so many years ago, that mommy and daddy weren’t coming home. She would let it out eventually, when she could be alone, when nopony could see her cry, but as she gazed upon the body of her friend, she only felt numb. Her mind couldn’t wrap around the concept. Rainbow Dash was just gone. How could it be possible? She knew the tears would fall from her eyes eventually, her sadness would hit her with a vengeance. But she wouldn’t let it happen just yet. It didn’t feel right. Rainbow deserved tears.
The doctors left the room, to give them time to grieve. The kindly doctor who’d taken care of Rainbow offered his sympathies, before shutting the door behind him. Applejack heard them, but couldn’t for the life of her remember what he’d just said. Rarity and the little filly had both collapsed on the floor in agony, sobbing. Applejack wanted to go to them, the hold them try to give the small amount of she could offer. Even her mother showed the proper response, she sobbed and wailed, gave Rainbow the tribute of tears she deserved. Applejack still felt angry towards both parents, but at the very least, it seemed her mother had loved Rainbow, enough to know that now was the time to grieve. But then her eye’s fell upon the father. Applejack looked at him. There was only one thing in his eyes as he looked upon the lifeless husk of her friend. A subtle satisfaction. Applejack walked to him. Her vision suddenly turned red.
“Leave. Now.” She growled through gritted teeth.
“I intend to. Right after I get Sweetie.” He made to walk to his grieving daughters. Sweetie Belle had thrown herself upon Rarity, both of them sobbing uncontrollably. Applejack put out a hoof to stop him.
“Y’all are either gonna walk yourself out that door, or Ah’m gonna send you out the window.”
The stallion scoffed. His scoff was met with a swift hoof to his face. Applejack relished in the feeling of his muzzle cracking as she swung. Rarity’s dad landed on the floor. The farm pony knelt down beside him as her groveled on the hard cold tiles.
“You have five seconds before Ah open up the window.” The stallion didn’t scramble away, nor did it take him less than five seconds, but he walked himself out the door nonetheless, attempting to stop the blood dripping from his nose. Applejack turned back to the bed. Rainbow laid there, her endless energy brought to an abrupt and premature halt. No more competitions. No more talks of things she only felt comfortable discussing around her. No more would she her the rasp of her voice or be graced with her smile. One of the ponies she cared for most in this world had left her. Applejack breathed heavily through gritted teeth, fighting the urge to cry. This was her fault. All the ponies around her were in the worst pain they had ever know because of her. Rainbow said she didn’t blame her for what happened but that didn’t nothing to keep the orange mare from blaming herself. Rarity finally found the will to stand. Applejack saw her hooves were shaking. The orange mare ran to her, steadied the two sisters. Rarity’s sapphire eyes locked with her own. Somewhere mixed deeply within her endless torrent of pain, her eyes flashed with anger. She pushed the farm pony away. It wasn’t a rough shove, but Applejack let herself be moved by it. It wasn’t a rough shove, but it still hurt.
The two unicorns made their way to the bed, followed by their mother. Had she not looked so disturbed, Applejack would have asked her to leave to. But she had loved her daughter, just as all mothers should, and Applejack felt her contempt towards Rarity’s mother lessen slightly. Applejack stayed back, just as she had the past few days. Applejack loved Rainbow, just as she loved all of her friends. But they weren’t family. Applejack made her way towards the Belle’s. She wouldn’t linger much longer. Her friends needed to know, she would have to tell them. It would hurt to tell them but she wouldn’t cry. Not yet.
Applejack clasped Rainbow’s hoof in her own. It was still a little warm.
“Goodbye Rainbow. Ah’m so sorry.”