//------------------------------// // Royal First Impressions // Story: Real Equestrian Heroes // by skyace //------------------------------// “WHAT MEANS THIS INTRUSION?!!! WHO DARES TO DISTURB THE LUNAR PRINCESS AT HER BATH!!!?” Desperately spitting water and clawing at her now drenched red hair, Scarlett attempted to gather her wits enough to figure out just where she had ended up, and exactly who the lady with the cast-iron set of pipes was. This attempt was rendered futile when something lifted her up and shot her across the room and through the door, which was, unfortunately for Scarlett, closed at the time. Gasping air into her abused body, Scarlett finally managed to struggle to her feet, turning a half circle to face the woman whose bath she had evidently intruded upon. “My apologies Ma’am, I didn’t mean to…” “Guards!!! Seize the wretch!!!” For a long moment, Scarlett found herself frozen in stunned disbelief at the evidence that her eyes presented her brain. Standing before her, dripping water, was what appeared to be a blue-furred winged unicorn. Scarlett’s mind began to race in multiple directions, with one part debating whether this was a unicorn with wings or a pegasus with a horn. A related portion was berating the first for trying to classify what was clearly a vivid hallucination. The section devoted to logical thought and analysis took one look, threw up its metaphorical hands and cried “I’m out!”, and proceeded to sulk in the corner. And a small, nearly forgotten portion of Scarlett’s subconscious that housed her inner child began to jump up and down and shriek; “Awww, look at the pretty pony! She’s so cuuuute!” With all that was going on upstairs, Scarlett was understandably slow to react. This was rectified by a blast of indigo energy that was apparently shot from the creature’s horn, knocking Scarlett backwards against an extremely sturdy chest-of-drawers. This was enough to reawaken the portion of her brain that was a trained soldier. This portion took mere seconds to assess the situation, tell the rest of her brain to sit down and shut up, and kicked the rest of her body into high gear. Leaping to her feet, Scarlett dodged a second blast that disintegrated the furniture behind her. Throwing her body forward feet first, she managed to slide between the creature’s legs and out the door. Once again regaining her feet, she tore off down a small hallway and down a flight of curved stairs. Hearing a sudden clash of metal on stone, she chanced a look behind to determine whether she was being pursued. Her eyes widened at the sight of not only the first horse creature coming after her, with a glow around it’s horn that seemed to indicate a readiness to fire another of those force blasts, but it had been joined by two smaller creatures. At first glance they seemed identical to the first creature, but in the second that Scarlett allowed herself to look, she noticed several differences beyond the apparent size difference. These creatures both wore what appeared to be blue armor in the style of the ancient Romans or Greeks. Both creatures were of a uniform grey coloration; possessing yellow eyes with… slit cat pupils? And… bat wings?! No horn, but judging by the gleam of metal, they appeared to be armed with some sort of gauntlets with long claws extending a good five inches out of the base. They also seemed to be snarling at her with two long fangs extending from their upper jaws. By this point all three creatures (Scarlett hesitated to call them horses) had risen into the air and were fast approaching the fleeing Joe. Quickly analyzing the mobility disadvantage that these creatures presented her, Scarlett decided to expedite her descent down the tower. Leaping over the bannister railing, she began to leap from wall to wall, directing her descent into a controlled tumble down the interior of the tower. Latching onto a wall hanging, Scarlett swung out and landed with a roll that placed her back on her feet and out of the tower into what must have been the ground floor of the castle. By this time the big one’s cries had attracted several more of the bat winged horses, many of whom were armed with spears and what appeared to be crossbows. Scarlett now found herself ducking various missiles as she continued her mad dash. By this time the pursuit had progressed into what appeared to be a banquet hall, filled to overflowing with even more little horse creatures that appeared to be dressed in various takes on maid and butler uniforms. Scarlett’s sudden appearance among this herd with the large horse and her soldiers in tow yielded predictable results as the large space descended into complete chaos. Dodging spears and crossbow bolts, leaping over or dodging around screaming servant horses, Scarlett finally chose to leap onto what seemed to be the only clear running space available, which just happened to be the long table that the servants had been setting. Kicking over dishes and overturning goblets, Scarlett ran down the length of the table while trying to free her sidearm from its holster. Wincing as yet another arrow zinged by her head, she finally managed to yank her own miniature crossbow free from its case. Wrenching her body around, she somersaulted over a high-backed chair at the end of the table and slid to a stop kneeling just before a large set of double doors. Quickly lining up the small bow’s crosshairs, Scarlett prepared to fire at the apparent leader of the pursing soldiers. Perhaps cutting the apparent command structure out would buy her some time to escape and evade. The large winged/horned equine came around the corner of the large dining table; horn alight with a shimmering blue energy. Time seemed to slow as the creature caught sight of its quarry, weapon drawn and pointed between her eyes. Those same freakishly large eyes suddenly went even wider, as it realized it was being targeted, and the hunter had become the prey. For a long moment time seemed to freeze, as Scarlett tensed her finger, and began pulling the trigger back towards herself. Then a blinding pain exploded from the back of her skull, and her former target seemed to waver and shift as though under water. Then darkness consumed her, as Scarlett sprawled unconscious across the marble floor with a broken half of a spear shaft clattering beside her. If there was one thing that being in the military had taught Scarlett, it was the value in ‘playing dead’. There had been many occasions where an unsuspecting enemy had entered into a damning conversation while under the mistaken impression that she was still unconscious. Such occasions had often led to Scarlett gathering valuable intel, or at least allowed her time to formulate an escape plan before her captors could realize that their prisoner had recovered. Thus when Scarlett finally began to regain her wits, she made a conscious effort to ignore her throbbing skull while keeping her eyes closed as though she were still out. First things first: inventory. Limbs? She seemed to be bound sitting with her back against what felt like a stone pillar, and if the warmth on the side of her face and the smell of food were any indication, she hadn’t been taken far from the dining room she last remembered. Equipment? By the weight, she was still clad in her light body armor, but her belt and holster were conspicuously missing. Hearing? Oh, now this was interesting. “Luna, despite what you claim, I cannot fathom how this… creature managed to get through your bathroom window. Your personal quarters are located within the highest tower in the castle.” “I know how ridiculous it must seem sister, but I must trust the evidence put forth by mine own eyes.” “Are you sure that this creature does not in fact possess wings?” “None that I could discern, though I suppose they could have retracted beneath its attire.” A third voice joined the first two. Where the previous speakers had been female, this one was undoubtedly male, and spoke with the harsh, clipped tones of a soldier standing at attention. “Negative, Your Majesties. My stallions conducted a thorough search of the creature, and short of disrobing it, there was no sign of wings of any type.” Majesties? As in plural? And stallions?! “Our thanks, Sergeant. Hast there been word from the Solar Guard as to how yon creature may have ascended the wall?” Hast? Yon? What was this, Medieval Times? “Corporal Steady Eye has reported no sign of any climbing apparatus, but he and the captain are still going over the wall with a fine tooth comb.” Scarlett was suddenly distracted from the conversation by the feeling of someone (or something) stroking her hair. “Lieutenant Sentry! What, pray tell, dost thou think thou art doing?!” “S-sorry Princess Luna! It’s just… I really like its mane. It’s pretty.” Oh great, now she was getting fondled by one of the whatever-they-were that had captured her. Touch anything other than the hair buddy… “Calm down Luna. I understand you are feeling a little shaken..” “A little?” “… but that is no reason to snap the Lieutenant’s head off.” Oh crap on a cracker, he was doing it again. “Lieutenant! That was not permission to resume handling the prisoner’s mane.” “Sorry Princess Celestia! Won’t happen again ma’am!” Okay, so two princesses. Luna, the wannabe Shakespeare, and Celestia, the slightly saner sounding of the group. … Seriously?! Hands off the merchandise! “Really Tia? Now thou must fondle its tresses?” So much for ‘saner of the group’. “Simply examining the creature in greater detail. Lieutenant Sentry was right; it does have quite the luxurious head of hair.” Okay, enough is enough. Scarlett’s eyes snapped open, revealing a freakishly large eyeball inches away from her nose. Realizing that its prisoner had awoken, the creature jerked back, revealing itself to be a… oh Lord above, another one?!!! Scarlett panned her gaze from side to side, confirming that there were indeed now two large, winged unicorns, both of whom were regarding her as though she were some particularly poisonous snake. She immediately recognized the smaller, blue unicorn/pegasus (Pegacorn? Unisus?) as the one that had chased her through the tower. Standing next to her, was a yet larger specimen, pure ivory white with… a mane made of mist. Now that she had some time to observe the two, Scarlett realized that both creatures’ manes seemed to be comprised of fine silk that floated and shimmered in a non-existent breeze. Standing next to the two larger equines, was one of the smaller… bat-ponies, for lack of a better term, that had joined in the pursuit earlier. This one seemed slightly bulkier than the others that had been chasing her, and was currently covering her with a small crossbow. Oh, and he was snarling at her with bared fangs. Creepy. He was flanked by some dozen other smaller equines, some of whom looked similar to Count Draku-Horse and others who looked like normal horses. Normal horses with either wings or horns, and dressed in golden armor of course. Scarlett panned her gaze from left to right, noting that there were more armored equines standing guard at both ends of the dining hall, with even more of the winged variety hovering in front of the many ornate windows. While just to her right side… that must be ‘Lieutenant Sentry’ the hair fondler. Scarlett shot the now visibly quaking creature a death glare, and slowly and clearly began to speak; “Touch the hair one more time, and I will snap your leg off at the knee and shove it so far up your ass, you’ll be able to tickle that little marble you call a brain, understood?”. The golden garbed pegasus gulped visibly, before slowly lowering his… hoof to the marble floor. Scarlett noticed that he was still staring at her hair with poorly disguised fascination. Said it before, say it again. Creepy. Scarlett was distracted from Lieutenant Hair Fondler when the slightly smaller of the two pegacorns decided that now would be a good time to start the interrogation. Stepping forward and raising her chin imperiously, she began to slowly pan her gaze over Scarlett’s bound form. Apparently satisfied with her examination, the horse princess began to speak once more. “Well? Explain thyself creature, since you have proven thyself capable of speech, vulgar though it may be. Who, and what art thou? Perhaps you are an assassin? Who sent you, the griffons? Changelings? Art thou, in truth, a changeling thyself? Make haste, speak!” Straightening her posture as well as she was able, given the circumstances, Scarlett stared up into her interrogator’s eyes. “I am a member of the Military of the United States of America, call-sign Scarlett. As of 0900 hours, I was in pursuit of a dangerous organization of criminals and terrorists. There was a malfunction with a device they were attempting to activate, and I regained consciousness in freefall above your castle. I don’t know what a changeling is, nor was I aware of the existence of actual griffons, or for that matter unicorns, pegasi or whatever the hell you’re supposed to be.” The blue equine quirked an eyebrow before tossing her head and giving a derisive snort. “Dost believe me foaled yesterday? What is this… United States of America? 'Tis true, I am still fairly recently returned from mine exile, but surely I would have been made aware of a new principality arising during my absence.” At this, the blue pegacorn turned towards the larger white one, as though seeking confirmation. At the smaller equine’s unspoken question, the larger of the two simply shook her head. “I am also at a loss Luna. I have neither heard of this supposed country, nor have I ever encountered a creature that looks quite like this one. Although…” here the large one (Scarlett assumed this one to be Celestia, sister to the blue one, Luna) cocked her head and began to scan Scarlett’s features with greater intensity “She does remind me of something mentioned within one of our older texts.” After a short period of scrutiny, Celestia finally addressed Scarlett directly. “You mention a ‘criminal organization’. Care to elaborate?” Scarlett nodded. “Certainly. Known as ‘Cobra’, they are an international terrorist and paramilitary organization. As clichéd as it may sound, their goal is literal world domination beneath the heel of the organizations supreme leader, known only as Cobra Commander.” There was a disbelieving snort, as the burly crossbow toting bat-pony decided to chip in his two cents worth. “Do you actually expect us to believe that? Do you take us for foals to be entertained by comic strip drivel?” Realizing that this conversation was getting her nowhere fast, Scarlett began rhythmically flexing her bound wrists. You didn’t spend five years as a ninja’s girlfriend and not pick up some escapism techniques. “I don’t care if you believe me or not, the fact remains that if I’m here, Cobra is most likely somewhere nearby as well.” Luna moved a step closer to the bound Joe. “Though Sergeant Shield was blunt in his assessment of your story, I cannot disagree with him. How do we know that thou are not with this… Cobra? Thou hast told us much, and yet nothing at the same time. What art thou? Where do you come from? How numerous is this criminal band? Art thou truly their enemy, and by the same token, art they our enemy? Mayhaps you are merely attempting to buy yourself time for your companions to rescue you, or perhaps this Cobra is in truth on the side of good while it is thou who art the criminal!” Scarlett glared up at the midnight blue princess, snarling her reply even as her fingers finally slipped through the loops of her bindings. “I have told you as much as I am allowed. You want to talk about trust? Look at things from my view point. I’m tied up with a splitting headache,” she noticed Lieutenant Sentry looking rather guilty at that “Surrounded by freaking unicorns and pegasi, creatures out of myth. I have no idea where I am, only that I am likely not even in my home universe anymore. If you want any more information out of me, than we are going to have to have a little give and take here.” Celestia spoke up. “It would appear that we are all suffering as victims of circumstance. We cannot trust you since you somehow penetrated the heavily guarded royal quarters, and you cannot trust us due to our guards attacking and restraining you. We both apparently view the other as an alien creature out of myth and legend. The question is how do we proceed from here?” She turned to her sister. “Luna, are you willing to extend a small measure of trust towards our guest, in return for a greater understanding of the events that led to her intruding upon your privacy?” Luna seemed to hesitate for a moment, before finally acquiescing with a firm nod. “Very well Sister, if thou art willing to allow her freedom, I will bow to your discretion.” She then turned her stern gaze upon Scarlett. “Know this. Should thou intend harm upon our own person or our subjects, thou will wish that Tartarus itself would swallow you up ere I am finished with thee.” Turning to her guard, she extended her hoof towards Scarlett. “Sergeant Aegis. Please release the prisoner that we may speak with her as befits civilized beings.” At that moment, Scarlett brought her hands around her front, and began working on freeing her ankles. “Much appreciated princess, but I think I can take it from here.” Scarlett had to suppress a smirk as Luna whipped her head around and stared at the now standing human in shock. “How didst thou loose thy bindings?!” Scarlett finally gave in, and grinned at the flabbergasted equines surrounding her. “Trade secret, but I’ll tell you this much. When picking a boyfriend, make sure you get him to pass on any freaky skills he may have. You never know when they might come in handy.” Celestia gave a gentle cough, and gestured to the re-served table behind them with a graceful wing motion. “Please Miss Scarlett, come and sit with my sister and me. We will chat over our respective concerns and questions in comfort. There is much, I feel, that we have to discuss.”