Chapter Four: The Possibly, Potentially, and Probably Unnecessary Additional Chapter to Wrap Up Loose Ends and Provide Both the Perspective of Minor Characters not Involved in the Main Action and a More Complete Sense of Closure to the Reader Who may not Have Enjoyed Where the Previous Chapter Left Off in Terms of Finality that in Other Works may have Been Called an Epilogue but Probably Not, Especially in this Work Because the Original Titled it Chapter Four and Not an Epilogue
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"Oh darling, I'm so worried about those two darlings and what might have happened to them. Maybe Twilight tripped and got dirt on her side! Oh, the poor darling!" said a white unicorn with a fancy purple mane and a propensity for calling things 'darling' (who I don't even need to name) to nopony in particular.
Then Rainbow Dash flew back into the library through the still-open door despite her injuries. She looked absolutely horrible, despite feeling fine due to years of experience crashing unexpectedly (as opposed to crashing expectedly, which for her was an incredibly rare experience). Her body was covered all over with streaks of brown dirt and mud, and the mud also had clumps of leaves stuck to them. Less obviously, there were a few cuts and scrapes as well, and Rainbow had a tired look on her face.
"Oh my darling! You look absolutely dreadful! I simply must wash you and get you clean before anything else happens at all, darling," insisted Rarity, pulling her into the lavatory of the library.
Almost simultaneously, a yellow blur shot out of a corner of the library, saying something along the lines of "oh my gosh there's an injured pony that is also my friend within two hundred metres of me I'm practically contractually obligated to treat and baby them until they get better" in an extremely quiet voice almost completely lost to the noises the blur made as it made its egress to find supplies for treatment.
Rainbow Dash lowered her head (all the while being dragged by Rarity) and notified the others of her failure to find Twilight at all.
"Ooh, ooh, did you try looking at the big bright light? Historically it's been shown to work zero out of zero times, which means you'll never know if it's effective or not if you don't try!" said Pinkie Pie excitedly.
At the mention of the big bright white light, Rainbow Dash shut her mouth and said nothing more for fear of embarrassment, not wanting any of her friends to know about her incident involving her crashing into the ground due to the extremely bright white light despite the fact that her friends would probably be supportive of her regardless of the circumstances (extenuating, attenuating, or otherwise) involved. Rarity finally completed her task of pushing Rainbow into the lavatory and shut the door.
Spike, once the distraction in the form of the love of his life was removed, snapped back to reality (gravity, however, did not go). His draconic brain took a few seconds to remember his train of thought (before it had been utterly derailed by his intense love) and his face lit up as if a light bulb had lit up above it (but not actually). He raised a claw and almost struck his forehead with it in a gesture of exasperation. "I have to write a letter to the Princess about what's happened to Twilight!" he exclaimed, producing a writing utensil, comprised mostly of a feather, from who knows where on his body. He started to recite the words he was writing. "Dear Princess Celestia," he managed, before pausing to contemplate the placement of his words. It wasn't that the princess would chastise, rebuke, or even castigate him for improper word choice; rather, he was searching for words that would suitably convey the immense urgency compelling him to write the letter. Ironically, or perhaps unironically, his pausing to carefully consider his choice of words was greatly diminishing the urgency with which he wrote the letter. After a (luckily brief) pause, he continued.
"Help! Twilight ran away because Trixie doesn't love her back and we don't know where she is. Help! - Spike." He rolled up the letter and blew on it with his signature green dragonmail flame. In his haste, he blew a little too vigorously and heated the surrounding air to a temperature above the comfortably range within a considerable radius, causing the ponies in his vicinity to shy away from the unpleasantly warm and/or hot air. At this, one of the equines, if they had been more self-referential than they were now, might have made a pun on the phrase "hot air". Alas, they were not, and so the pun remains unmade.
The green dragon-mail flame of Spike, having been blown indoors (not by zombies) instead of out of a window as it usually was, slowly floated towards the main entrance to the library that was also a tree. The door to the main entrance of the library then glowed with a shade of lavender (specifically the one denoted by the hex code #B57EDC in the RGB standard, corresponding to a hue of 275.1 degrees, 57.3% saturation, and 67.8% brightness in the HSB space) and opened due to the force applied by telekinesis of a certain quadruped lavender equine lifeform with wings and a horn.
The dragon-mail flame reached its destination a mere seven metres from its source. It would have broken the record for "Most roundabout method of communication of something seemingly incredibly urgent but actually completely inconsequential" were it not for a series of letters addressed to Princess Celestia from Pinkie Pie about a dire cupcake shortage in a faraway land. Its recipient looked mildly surprised at the letter suspended in the air in front of her.
"Whoa, how come I have a letter?" she asked. Her eyebrows raised themselves by two hundred and sixty four micrometres, indicating confusion.
Before anyone could respond, the blue pony accompanying her from behind ran forward and snatched the letter out of the air. "I must read this correspondence that was clearly intended for you for no reason in particular!" she exclaimed, unfurling the letter. She read it for several seconds, since she was literate and thus capable of reading the written word. "Twilight ran away? What? I have to go find her!"
"Uh, no? I'm clearly still here. Who even wrote this, and why was it sent to me?" asked Twilight.
"Wait a second. I sent that letter to the Princess! How come it went to you?" asked Spike the purple and green dragon, just as confused. Somehow, he didn't notice two new appendages on her sides.
"Oh no wonder. I killed Celestia; Trixie and I are the new princesses of Equestria," explained Twilight with a note (specifically D#) of pride.
"Oh, darling, this is marvelous! Simply MARVELOUS! I'm friends with royalty now!" said the white unicorn who was more preoccupied with social status than the other occupants of the library.
"Congratulations, Twi! We're all so proud of you," said Applejack.
"Now I have to throw a Celestia-and-Luna-are-overthrown-and-Twilight-and-Trixie-are-the-new-princesses-party!" shouted the pink pony, preoccupied with party planning.
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At a point later in time and higher in elevation, at a party named in a certain way by a certain pink pony...
"So, uh, yeah. My five friends are also princesses now because they're cool!" said Twilight, "That should be it for the spell. Any minute now..."
Rainbow Dash waited about four seconds before piping up. "Don't tell me you messed up the spell and we're stuck in an alternate universe now where everything sucks and we have to spend another seventy five chapters and eight hundred thousand words getting back."
As soon as the words left her mouth, the five ponies who were Princess Twilight's friends glowed with an intensely bright light (exceeding that of the great plasma ball in the sky by twenty-fold) and suddenly they were all alicorns too. They sparkled for a brief moment after their transformations and investigated their new appendages with varying degrees of confusion, curiosity, and excitement.
"Whoa, this is totally radical, man!" said Rainbow Dash, poking her new keratinous head-protrusion.
The other ponies muttered and mumbled various words of agreement.
They lived happily ever after. The end.