There is never really such a thing as too much training. Whether it is with an instrument, in driving a vehicle, performing a certain task, there is always something to expand on. Even when one thinks they may have perfected their practice, there is always something new to learn.
This is especially true in the case of a military formation. With their jobs being the most important, they need to come as close to perfection, knowing any and every technique used in their field. The group in the spotlight for this day’s training would be the Equestrian Royal Guards.
Most of the time they got the job done, and usually done well, but there was room for improvement, especially with their new friends coming into play. There was, quite literally, an entire new world of work to look into, for which they were ill-prepared. Still, they had to start with something, and the British Royal Army was going to be kind enough to get them started.
The only catch was that the British would be showing them a new technique, top secret experiments that they were putting high hopes on. Only a very small group of Guards were allowed to come, along with their Captain. That was why Captain Shining, Flash Sentry, and a handful of other Guards had come to England, in hopes of starting off some good relations with their new friends.
“Right, here we are,” the driver of the Army truck announced in his Scottish accent. “This is where you lot get off.”
"Thank you,” Shining Armor replied as the group of ten piled out of the truck.
Once they were all out, thee truck started down the road again, leaving them in front of a large castle.
"So this is Edinburgh Castle?” Flash asked, looking at the gigantic structure that watched over the Scot capital city of Edinburgh. “It’s not too bad.”
“More than just that, it’s downright incredible,” another Guard commented. “I’ve read so much about this place.”
"And yet you can’t even pronounce it right.”
“E-din-berg.”
“No, no, you have to silence the last part,” another said. “E-din-buruh….I think.”
“Alright, enough chatter,” Captain Shining ordered. “Let’s get going.”
As the group began making their way to the castle, they noticed a figure standing on the battlements, playing music from his bagpipes, the sound of which filled most of the area. The player took a few steps back, disappearing from their sights. They were about to continue on into the castle itself when they heard a loud yell and looked up to see the bagpipe player throw himself off the top of the battlements of the castle, falling quickly and hitting the ground hard in front of them.
“Whoa! What was that about!?” Flash yelled. “Did he just he kill himself!?”
“Correction, kamikazied himself,” a voice said.
They looked back up to see a soldier of the Royal Army, wearing the rank of a Sergeant Major, with a small mustache, blue pants, black beret, and a light-brown shirt with a red stripe running across.
“He what?”
“You’re the group of Guards we’ve been expectin’, right?” he asked.
“Yes, that’s us,” Shining replied, still in a state of confusion and shock, along with most of the others.
“Well, come this way and I’ll be happy to explain things.”
The Sergeant Major led them back into the castle, with the Guards each trying to avoid the corpse by as far as possible without being overly-dramatic.
“You see Captain; this castle here is our secret training base for our newest batch of elite soldiers, the Queen’s Own Kamikaze Highlanders,” he explained.
"Wait, what does Kamikaze mean?” one of the other guards asked.
“It means the troops are trained to hurl themselves at a critical target and destroy it.”
“You mean a suicide attack!?”
“Don’t worry on it, the regiment is made entirely of volunteers,” the Sergeant Major said. “And we have the highest hopes in our group.”
The Sergeant Major lead the group up into the highest part of the castle, just in time to see yet another Highlander jump off the walls. The room also had a handful of other Scotsmen, waiting their turn to jump. As the Guards walked in, they halted the program to begin their new mission.
“I’m sorry, I’m just having a tough time understanding all this,” Shining said.
“Oh, trust me Captain; our training program is one of the best in the world,” the Sergeant Major said proudly. “Why it’s so effective, that we’ve gone from thirty-three recruits to a dozen in three weeks.”
Shining looked at the group of Scotsmen with a confused glance.
“How come you all are so eager to do this?” he asked.
“Well, the pay is good,” one answered.
“Oh, and the waterskiing!” another added happily.
“Right then, let’s get on with your training,” the Sergeant Major said, referring to the Guards. “I believe you’ve already seen a demonstration earlier.”
“Right,” Shining said cautiously. “And…what exactly do you want us to do?”
“Oh it’s quite simple,” he explained. “Simply step up to the plate, take a good look at what your targeted landing is, get a good running start, and take a good strong leap off the walls.”
“I… think there might be some… misunderstanding,” Shining said, now trying to desperately avoid the exercise. “I’m uh… sure we can uh… find another way too-”
“Nonsense, this is some of the best trainin’ you’ll find,” one of the Scotsmen said. “Why our Kamikaze instructor was so good that ‘e never even left Tokyo airport!”
“Right, that’s the kind of attitude we need from a Kamikaze Highlander,” the Sergeant Major proclaimed proudly. “Now, would anyone like to volunteer to go first?”
All of the Guards shifted back a bit, trying to stay out of sight, and Shining becoming more and more desperate by the second.
“I-I think we-”
“I’ll go first,” Flash said confidently.
“Flash, are you insane!?” Shining asked, pulling him aside.
“Captain, did you forget I had wings?” he asked. “I’ll just fly off.”
“Flash, something will-”
“Right then, always nice to have a volunteer!” the Sergeant Major said, leading Flash over to the edge. “Now remember what I said; focus hard on where you want to land.”
“Yep, sure, got it,” Flash replied plainly.
He was about to leap over the edge and fly off when the British Sergeant grabbed a hold of him.
“Hold up, this one here’s got wings,” the Sergeant Major observed. “Sapper MacDonald!”
“Aye sir!” the Scotsman said, running up to him.
“Alright, let’s give these wings a good shattering,” he ordered, grabbing a firm hold on one of them. “One two and three!”
“What-AAAAAAHHHHH!”
Flash yelled and jerked as the bones in both wings broke and fell limply by his sides, completely useless.
“Nicely done! Over the top then, mate!”
“W-wait! Hang on!”
The two humans did not listen, picking up the pegasus and throwing him over the edge. With his wings useless, he fell like a rock, hitting the ground with a hard thunk. The sound made the remaining Guards wince.
“Ah, he didn’t control himself, missed the area by a mile; he’s not cut out for it,” the Sergeant Major observed. “Alright, who wants the next go?”
The remaining Guards were totally silent, shaking a bit in fear.
“Ah, I see; you all have a bit of jump fright, eh?” he said, simply. “Let’s see now, five of you left and five of our trainees left.
Ah, here’s an idea;you’ll all get a jump buddy!”
“W-what?” Shining stuttered, not really sure of what to do.
“Right, cadets! Each of you grab one of these poor sods and take them over the side with you! It’ll be a good chance to demonstrate some comradeship!”
“Aye sir!” they replied, each taking an individual Guard and beginning to leap over the edge.
“Not too shabby, eh Captain?” the Sergeant Major asked. “Would you like to participate in a training routine?”
“No!” Shining yelled, finally snapping. “You’re completely insane.”
“I understand, most people who don’t do the training don’t understand,” he replied.
“Sapper MacDonald, you go ahead and assist the Captain!”
“Yes sir!” the Scotsman replied, grabbing his horn with one arm to stop the magic and using the other to lift him up and drag him across the room.
“Oh no no no!” Shining yelled as he was dragged over. “Ahhhhh!”
The Sergeant Major looked over at the results.
“By God, Captain; you hit it right on the nose!” he yelled down to the unicorn.
“T-T-Thanks,” he stuttered, miraculously alive from landing on top of the Sapper.
“Course, there’s always room for improvement,” the Sergeant Major continued. “I’ll send someone down and we can try again as soon as you’re back up here! You’ll make Kamikaze black belt before you know it!”