The Day My Life Began

by Authora97


Birth of the CMC

Cheerilee has seen many things in her years as a teacher. She’s seen every exploding volcano project, magical burst, note sharing, every excuse for late homework, the day becoming everlasting night, an Ursa Minor rampaging into town, a zebra living in the Everfree Forest, a large dragon snoozing near Ponyville, a strange Winter Wrap Up and an invasion of strange little creatures that nearly ate Ponyville.

But this, this was a first.

Across from her desk stood two figures. A pink unicorn with a curly midnight blue mane with sterling silver streaks, amber eyes, and a cutiemark of an open book with a blue and silver jump rope around it.

The second was a dragon.

A small purple dragon.

A small purple dragon with blue scales.

A small purple dragon with blue scales that was applying to go to school.

Her school.

Cheerilee smiled at Raspberry Stardust. “Excuse me, I must’ve misheard. What did you say?”

The unicorn just smiled. “I want to enroll Lilac in your school.”

The mauve earth pony smiled, still unsure. “Could you explain as to why you wish to enroll Lilac?”

Raspberry nodded. “Yep. I want Lilac to get a good education and I’m not sure I can do that. My life is very hectic as of late, what with the move and my sister staying with us, so I decided to take Lilac to school. Is that some kind of problem?”

Cheerilee kept on smiling, stepping off her chair. “Well, no. But aren’t you worried about her wellbeing?”

Raspberry nodded. “Lilac, what did I tell you about bullies?”

The dragon replied with earnest. “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will leave fighty soft-

“Philosophical” Raspberry interjected.

“-philosophical wounds that will never heal!” Lilac cheered, her fanged smile showing..

The unicorn gave a look to Cheerilee. “So, are we good?”

Cheerilee, without any other strange questions, nodded. “Yes. Lilac can start first thing tomorrow.”

The two in front of Cheerilee cheered, high hoofing/clawing before calming down. Raspberry’s horn glowed amber, revealing a paper placed in her saddlebag.

“I also noticed in the Ponyville Gazette that you had a job opening?” Raspberry said, revealing the job wanted section with one such ad circled in red. The job was asking for anypony who was good at telling stories, fables, myths, or other such stories.

Cheerilee nodded. “Yes, because of all the strange events recently, my storyteller quit.”

Raspberry nodded. “Would it be at all possible if I could have the job? I have been looking for one as of late.”

Cheerilee raised a brow, her lime green eyes curious. “Are you good?”

“On some days, other days the villain way of life is very appealing.” Raspberry joked. “But, I have had some good reviews on my storytelling.”

The teacher nodded. “Great. When can you start?”

“Monday!” Raspberry suggested.

“Alright, you’ll only be needed Monday, Wednesday and Friday.” Cheerilee explained to the excited mare. “Tuesdays and Thursday are free.” Raspberry nodded. “Also, some of them will be filled with all-day Field Trips, school holidays, and possibly an assembly. I’ll let you know when you get here if any such events have taken place.”

“A-okay!” Raspberry cheered.

“You’ll get paid 30 bits a day, 20 if you get cancelled. Is that alright?”

“Perfect!”

“Alright.” Cheerilee said, lifting up the necessary paperwork from a drawer in her desk. “Welcome to the school, Lilac and Ms. Raspberry.”

Raspberry waved a hoof. “Please, call me Raspberry.”

The maroon earth pony nodded. “Alright, have a nice day Lilac and Raspberry.”

“You too Ms. Teacher!” Lilac cheered, hopping down from her seat and running out the classroom door. Raspberry followed soon after.

The teacher smiled, getting started on the paperwork for enrolling Lilac. “It’s so nice to see mother’s and daughter’s so close together.”


Morgan/Raspberry


“See Lilac! I told you I’d get you into school!” I told the little dragon.

Lilac was beaming, it was like a kid on Christmas day! She was skipping along the pathways, giving warm greeting to anypony we passed. It was starting to creep me out, the level of joy she was carrying for a kid about to start school.

The idea to enroll her in school came once Darcy and I got back from Home. I had realized that the next episode was a Cutie Mark Crusader episode, thus I would not be able to do all that I had done with the Mane 6. Darcy was ecstatic when I explained Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon to her. She always liked bullies, their hair made nice scarves (her words, not mine).

I had nearly given up on a game plan, when a certain purple dragon walked into my room. Darcy and I had exchanged glances and we both were thinking the same thing. I turned to Lilac and asked her with a straight face “How would you feel about going to school?”

Side note: Need more glass from bedroom windows... and mirror.

The job thing came about when I realized we were going to run out of money eventually. When I suggested Darcy go job searching, she groaned. Darcy wasn’t one for jobs, assassinations maybe but not jobs. I told her there might be something she liked, and if she didn’t find a job by Diamond Tiara’s party I was getting her a job at Fluttershy’s

That got her searching. Quickly.

I was telling the truth when I said I found the ad in the paper. I had always wanted a job like that. Working with kids, being a storyteller, Darcy was almost always telling me how good I was at telling stories. Might as well give it a shot.

One thing that was ticking at the back of my mind, was what would happen at the party on Tuesday. I was worried what could happen if Lilac somehow ended up with the CMC’s. Those fillies are sweet, but...Lilac’s a dragon, with claws, and fangs, and magical fire that sends objects to wherever she wants.

We had been testing it. Killjoy liked using my daughter as a fax machine.

I said daughter again didn’t I? That’s becoming a nasty little habit.

“I knew you would but I was worried ‘bout stuff.” Lilac said.

“What kinda stuff?” I asked, looking at a nearby window to see if it was a window store. Do they even have those?

Lilac scuffed her feet. “Well, I’m not gonna know anypony...what if they think I’m weird?”

“Weird is just a side effect of awesomeness.” I joked, noticing the serious look on her purple face.

Lilac was mature for a four year old. I would like to say Past Raspberry had a hoof in it, but I think it was just her dragon DNA that did that. Sometimes, she acted like a four year old would, but others she would act like she was twenty. It was weird having somebody younger than me act so mature, especially when I usually had Darcy around.

I placed a hoof over her shoulder. “Hey, you remember Applejack’s little sister? You met her during Applebuck Season?”

Lilac waited a moment. She nodded.

“She goes to that school too. I’m almost positive you two would make great friends.” I encouraged. “And, there’s Rarity’s little sister, who is sweet as sugar. And that pegasus I see following Rainbow Dash around sometimes.” Poking my chin with my hoof, I glanced up and noticed said pegasus zooming across the sky.

*bzzzt*

Crap.

“Look out!” A small voice called out from behind us.

Instead, I turned back and saw a little orange pegasus riding on her scooter. Her magenta eyes widened as the scooter caught closer and closer to Lilac and I. Pushing Lilac out of the path of the scooter and shutting my eyes, I felt a pain in my side as I hit by Scootaloo’s scooter.

For some reason, instead of stopping it, the scooter was going faster. Squinting an eye open, I saw the scooter was still going. I turned my head to see an orange pegasus with her magenta mane hidden by a purple helmet driving a scooter,

“Hey.” I said casually.

“Uh...” Scootaloo said. “Hey.”

“Hey! Watch where you’re going!” A random pony called out.

“Oops, I guess this is my fault.” I said, realizing I was blocking Scootaloo from seeing. “This next parts gonna be too. Try landing on your hooves.”

Scootaloo looked confused. “What?”

Picking the filly up in my magic I tossed her to the side, where she landed on a bush.

“Sorry!” I called out.

Adjusting myself, I placed myself on the back of the scooter with my hooves on the handlebars. Judging from the buildings I’m passing I’m getting close to Town Square. Okay, I hope this goes well.

Using my magic to keep the scooter going, I managed to avoid the passersby and various stands. I called out some sorry’s in case I almost hit somepony. It was as I was zooming around a corner that I noticed Rarity.

“Hi Rarity!” I said, zooming away from her before she could give a response.

Focusing back on the road, I saw a bench approaching with Lyra and Bonbon on it.

“Four years in a circus, don’t fail me now.” I whispered as I pushed up on the scooter. That, and used a spell to helped push me up.

I went over the bench, missing the two mares by a couple inches.

“Sorry about that!” I called back, noticing two figures chasing after me. It was Lilac and Scootaloo!

Quickly turning my eyes back to the front, I noticed various other ponies that I just barely avoided hitting. Off in the distance, I saw a familiar hollow out tree. It didn’t look like anypony was in the way, it was gonna be straightforward from here on.

“Mommy!” Lilac shouted from behind me.

I turned back, using magic to keep the board straight. “Hi Lilac!”

“Slow down!” She shouted.

“Can’t! Too much momentum! I could break something!” I called back.

“Well then why did you throw me off?!” Scootaloo yelled.

“I made sure you landed on something soft!” False, I assumed she would be landing on grass. “And, it was hard for you to see!”

Their eyes suddenly widened.

“Look out!” They both screamed.

“Why?” I yelled, turning back only to have a wood wall pushed into my face.

*SLAM*

*crash*

*thump* *thump* *thump*

“Spike?! What was that!”

“It came from outside!”

I fell to the ground with a thud, and little tiny scooters flying about my head. “Hehehe, scooters with wings.” I laughed.

“Mommy!” A familiar voice said. I saw in her in my shaky eyesight a second later.

“Hey, you look familiar.” I said, the dizziness making my vision fuzzy.

“Raspberry!” Another familiar voice shouted angrily. Her head was entered my eyesight too. Two purple shapes above my head, both with midnight blue on their head, which one was Twilight?

“Hey, have I seen you before?”

One of the heads looked at the second, the second shrugged.

“What happened?” Twilight’s voice asked.

“We were walking down the street when Mommy crashed into that filly’s scooter.”

“Yeah!” That voice was familiar too. Damn, I need to get my head on straight. “And then, she threw me off! We’ve been chasing this crazy mare for the past five blocks!”

“What?!” Twilight shouted.

I blinked a couple times, trying to get my sense back. Slowly getting up, I noticed the three girls were too focused on their problems to notice me stumble about.

“I’m okay! Thanks for asking.” I said, accidentally walking into the tree. “Gah! And I say I’m the smart one of the family.” I groaned.

“Raspberry why did you steal this filly’s cart!?” Twilight yelled.

After blinking a few times, I was finally able to see straight. The librarian stood before me with a cross look. I blinked hard one more time and saw my surrounding sharpen and solidify.

“Because,” I answered slowly, making sure I was okay mentally. “If she had stayed on, we may have crashed into something. I was kinda accidentally blocking her sight. So, I tossed her off the scooter and rode off to slow the scooter down. The momentum was too fast for me to just stop it, somepony would’ve gotten hurt, so I rode it out until I crashed.” I nodded, rubbing the sore part of my skull where I crashed into the library. “That’s gonna smart in the morning.” I said. I motioned towards Scootaloo. “What’s your name?”

The pegasus huffed. “Scootaloo.”

“Nice ta meet ya Scootaloo. Sorry about your scooter, is it broken?” I asked, looking over Twilight.

“Don’t change the subject!” Twilight scolded.

“I’m just making sure I didn’t break it. The scooter probably has deep meaning for Scootaloo, I need to know if I have to fix it.” I told Twilight, standing myself up only to fall back down. “Okay. No getting up.” I shrugged.

Crawling over towards where the scooter landed, I saw the little daredevil lift it up.

“Wow. It’s lovely.” Lilac said.

It had a plain blue board, bright red wheels and red grips on the handlebar. It had some wear and tear, but overall looked great. It survived the crash at least.

Scootaloo nodded. “Yeah, thanks.” She moved it about, looking all over it.

“The scooter looks fine, no damage done.” I said happily. “Can’t say the same about myself though.” I remembered something. “Hey, did either of you see me jump the board over that bench?”

Scootaloo and Lilac nodded, both suddenly looking ecstatic. “The one with Lyra and Bonbon?”

“That one!” I said.

“That was amazing!” Lilac cheered.

“Yeah! That was totally cool! How did you do that, with no ramp?!” Scootaloo said.

I shrugged, slowly lifting myself up again. “It was kinda easy, you just push up at the right second and whoosh! It’s like you’re flying!”

“Really?!” Scootaloo nearly shouted.

“Yeah! I’ve done some cool stunts in my life; jumping over a gorge, skydiving over a pit of fire, twenty-five carriage crashes, eighteen airship crashes, those boat crashes, buildings collapsing, fires, tornados, hurricanes. But, that one was the most spontaneous one I have ever done.” I laughed. “I thought I was gonna crash!” I laughed again, a little louder and longer.

Lilac started laughing too. “I thought it was funny!”

Scootaloo gave a small laugh too. “It was kinda funny, but still totally amazing!”

The three of us laughed, until I remembered Twilight behind us. “Sparkle of Twilight, join in on the fun!”

Twilight pretended not to hear the nickname. “You crashed into my wall. Books fell off the shelves on the other side.” Twilight explained.

I groaned. “Fine, I’ll help.” Looking back at the two children, I put on a serious face. “Lilac, play with Scootaloo. She’s going to your school too.” I walked towards the library with an angry unicorn in front of me.

Well, that was an eventful five minutes.


Monday. First Day of School


“Is that the last picture, Mommy?”

“Yep.” I placed the disposable camera in my saddlebag. “I’ll take the rest later during my first day on the job.” I lifted a brow. “Do you have all your stuff for the day?”

Lilac saluted. “I got my pencils, feathers, papers, crayons, a ruler, note cards, paints and paint brushes, and my lunch!”

“Which is?” I asked.

“A banana nut muffin, two sapphires, hay fries, a grape juice box, and a cupcake!” Lilac said proudly.

I nodded. “Perfect.”

“Gah! You’re mushy gushyness sickens me.” Killjoy said from behind me. I levitated some of the colored pencils Lilac asked for into her specially designed bag. “Can’t you despise each other for one day?”

I glanced at Lilac, both our brows raised in shared thought. “You are just the cutest little thing I have ever seen.”

Lilac laughed. “Your da smarterest pony I know.”

I laughed, looking back at the falling Killjoy.

“Ugh! You’re happiness has killed me!” Killjoy groaned. She stuck her tongue out like she was dead.

“You’re faking.” Lilac laughed.

Killjoy was silent.

I rolled my eyes. “Let’s let my sister rot in peace.”

“Mommy! That’s not very nice!” Lilac said as we walked out of the house.

“What? Killjoy would like some peace and quiet. Death or no death.” The two of us walked into Ponyville, the early sun shining.

Lilac nodded. She started skipping soon after.

I laughed. She was adorable.

Soon enough, the school yard came into my view. Foals were being guided inside by the parents/older siblings, some of them not looking very happy. I saw Cheerilee standing by the door, making sure every foal got inside.

I waved. “Hiya Cheerilee!”

The maroon earth pony turned to me, a teacher’s smile on her face. “Hello Raspberry, hello Lilac.” She greeted. When Lilac and I arrived at the door, the teacher leaned down towards the dragon. “Excited for today?”

“Yes ma’am!” Lilac nearly squealed.

Cheerilee and I chuckled. She looked over at me, a slightly more serious look on her face. “And are you prepared for this afternoon?”

I nodded. “Yep. I’ll be there by 2 o’ clock sharp!”

Cheerilee nodded, smiling brightly. “Perfect.” She moved her attention to Lilac. “What do you say we go inside and get started?”

Lilac nodded. “Okay!” She gave me hug, very tight and quick. “Have a good day Mommy!”

I patted her head. “I will.”

The purple dragon ran into the school house, Cheerilee following soon after.

...

...

Now what do I do?


Lilac


This is the best day ever!

Once the school day started, Ms. Cheerilee intro...duced me to everypony! Some of the foals said hi, but two of them were kinda mean. A pink earth pony and a silver earth pony. They just glared at me. I saw Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo! They were really nice. I got a seat in the back left corner. It was behind the pink earth pony, but next to Scootaloo.

When Ms. Cheerilee finished roll call, we had Science. After that, we had something called math-e-matress. No wonder Mommy gets mad when she does numbers, this stuff is confusing!

Once the numbers were done, Ms. Cheerilee told us all it was lunch time! She took us all outside to the playground, showing us a bunch of picnic tables. Soon everypony was soon eating with their friends, but I couldn’t find a place to sit.

“Hey Lilac!”

Turning towards the voice, I saw Scootaloo waving an orange hoof at me. She was sitting next to a white unicorn with a pink and purple mane, and green eyes. She looked around Scootaloo and my age.

I ran over to where they were sitting, making sure to bring my lunch bag.

“Hi Scootaloo.” Looking at her lunch, I saw she had a PB&J, carrots, apple juice and a chocolate cookie. I reached out my claw to greet the white unicorn. “Hi, my name is Lilac.”

The unicorn smiled. “My name is Sweetie Belle.” Her lunch looked a little more sophisticated. It was little hoofsandwiches made of lettuce with white bread, some grapes, and a juice box.

“How’s your first day been?” Sweetie Belle asked. Her voice was really nice.

“Great!” I grabbed one of my sapphires. “I don’t know why Mommy waited so long to send me to one!” I took a bite.

“Woah!” Scootaloo gasped. “How did you do that?’

I thought back to seconds before. What did I just do that surprised her? “Do what?”

Sweetie Belle answered. “Eat that sapphire!”

Lifting up the half eaten sapphire, I shrugged. “What’s so weird about that?” I said while taking another bite. Hmm...tastes like sparkly blueberries.

“Ponies can’t eat gems, their bicuspids can’t handle the strength of the gems!”

“What are you, a dictionary?” Scootaloo asked Sweetie Belle.

Sweetie Belle turned to Scootaloo. “I’m not a dictionary. I just know a lot of words.”

I giggled. “I’m a dragon, my teeth are stronger than pony teeth.” I told them.

The two ponies looked at me wide eyed. “Woah. Cool.” They both said.

We spent the rest of lunch eating and talking.

I love school!


Lunch was over. Ms. Cheerilee says recess is next. I don’t know what that it, but the others look excited.

“Now, go and have fun!” Ms. Cheerilee said.

The foals cheered. They ran out to the playground. We get to play!

I ran over towards the swingset. I really liked the swing sets. Jumping up onto the swing, I began pushing myself back and forth. Mommy taught me how to use these on my own. It was a lot of fun!

But, then they showed up.

“Ugh, look over there Silver Spoon.” A filly voice started.

“I am, Diamond.” A second voice said.

“What’s a lizard doing on our swingset?”

“I don’t know, Diamond. Maybe she doesn’t know.” The second voice reasoned.

“Well, let’s tell her.”

Suddenly, I felt hooves grip onto the swing. I fell to the ground with a thud.

“Ugh! *cough* *cough* *cough*. Hey! That wasn’t very nice!” I called out, standing back up to see two fillies.

One was the pink earth pony sitting in front of me. She had a pale purple and white wavy mane, royal blue eyes, a tiara with cubic zirconia gems on it (I’m a dragon, I know my gems), but no cutiemark. The second was the gray filly. Her white hair with a light silver stripe was done into a braid, she wore a pearl necklace and baby blue glasses. Her cutiemark was of a spoon the same shade of blue as her glasses with a bright pink heart at the top. Her eyes were a sparkly shade of purple, kinda like my aunt’s but a little lighter.

The pink one smiled, but the kind of smile I saw on my aunt when we went camping and she chased after a squirrel. The pink filly turned to the silver one. “Do you think she got the lesson Silver Spoon?”

The silver filly, who I guessed was Silver Spoon, nodded. “Yeah Diamond Tiara. No lizards on our swing sets.”

I glared at them. “They aren’t your swing sets, and that wasn’t very nice.”

Diamond Tiara rolled her eyes. She shoved me away, nearly making me fall again. “No lizards near the swing sets.” She looked at me with half rage and half questioning. “What are you even doing at this school? It’s for ponies!”

She was being really, really mean. I almost wanted to cry, but I stayed brave. “My Mommy signed me up for school-”

The bully laughed. “Your ‘mommy’? What? Did she get annoyed with you? Or maybe she was too dumb to do it herself.” She hopped up onto the swing I was just on. “Pretty lame dragon if she can’t even teach you.”

I growled. They could take about me all they wanted, but NOPONY talks about Mommy like that! Okay, maybe Auntie Killjoy, but Mommy lets her do that!

“My Mommy isn’t a dragon! She’s a really cool unicorn!”

The filly laughed, and I realized I said the wrong thing. “Woah. So, even your dragon mom didn’t want you and now some unicorn is stuck with you.” She looked over to the silver filly lifting herself onto the swing. “Isn’t that pathetic Silver Spoon?”

“Totally. And, it’s stuck as a blank flank, for like, ever!” The silver filly exclaimed.

Diamond Tiara’s eyes widened. “You’re right! So, not only isn’t it wanted by it’s ‘mommy’, but it’s talentless!”

The two fillies laughed cruelly. I ran over towards one of the trees covered with bushes alone.

It wasn’t until a minute or two later that Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle showed up.

“Lilac, what’s wrong?” Scootaloo asked.

I sniffled. “It was those two bullies.” I sniffled again.

My two new friends sat in front of me, their eyes curious. “Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon?” I nodded. Sweetie Belle recoiled. “Those two pick on everypony, especially us blank flanks.”

Scootaloo nodded. “Yeah! They’re always saying bad stuff about us.”

It was then I noticed, Sweetie Belle didn’t have a cutiemark like Scootaloo, or Apple Bloom, ...or me.

“That’s what *sniff* they told me.” I wiped my eyes. “And *sniff* then they said *sniff* my mom, my dragon mom, *sniff* *sniff* didn’t want me.” Curling myself into a ball, I cried.

I felt small hooves wrap around me. Squinting my eyes open, I saw Sweetie Belle.

“W-what are y-you doing?” I asked her.

Sweetie Belle was hugging me, very tightly I add. “Giving you a hug.”

I hugged her back. “Thanks.” I looked at the magenta maned pegasus expectantly.

Scootaloo flinched back. “I don’t do hugs.”

Sweetie Belle and I exchanged glances. We let each other go and walked towards the pegasus.

She slowly started backing away. “H-hey, what are you doing?”

The two of us got closer. Our friend was trying to find a way out. Before she got a chance, Sweetie and I pounced on her.

“Ahh!” Scootaloo groaned. I was squeezing her as tight as I could.

The three of us laughed after a minute. It was nice to have friends.


Morgan


“So, we good?” I asked Killjoy.

The mare nodded. “Yep. I think I got it all done.”

“Great, when is your next one?”

“423 days from today.” Killjoy recited.

“Great.” I looked at the watch I had purchased. I can’t tell the time by looking at the sun. “Crap! I’m gonna be late for work!”

Killjoy waved good-bye, a few splinters still in her fur from her assault on the unsuspecting tree. “K, don’t get fired.”

“Don’t plan to!” I shouted, running out of the Everfree Forest.

This morning, when I got back from dropping off Lilac at school, I realized today was Killjoy’s Freak-out Day. She was excited about it.

You see, due to our strange and bizarre lifestyle, there are days when something impossible happens. People ask us ‘How are you so calm?’. My sister and I answer with the same thing. ‘I save my freak out time for when I’m alone. Doing it now would just be stupid.’. With our lives being like they are, we can’t have them by dates or else things would get confusing. So, we just count numbers. Mine was in 236 days. I’m excited for it.

On Freak-out Day, one of us will go to a secluded area and just...freak out. Sometimes we bring breakables like vases or bottles and start smashing them. Sometimes we bring pillows to scream into. One time, Darcy brought a guy’s dead body and...yeah I’m just gonna stop there.

Killjoy’s victim today was a tree inside the Everfree Forest. She had been tearing into it since eight in the morning.. It’s almost two.

During this time, I hung out with Zecora. The shaman was very talkative, it was so cool hearing her talk in rhymes! She even got me into doing it at one point! I was talking in rhyme for twenty minutes before I realized it! Haha! Also, I got that strange feeling in my chest again, and I knew it was something important. Why can’t I just remember what it was?!

Ugh, nevermind. Gotta get to work.

Once Freak-out Day was done, we usually felt a lot better. It’s hard keeping all those screams contained. I was looking forward to mine so I could start freaking out about Lilac. Last time it was just improper.

Hey. Look. There’s the schoolhouse! I made it on time! Hopefully!

I stopped myself just outside the main door. Using a quick haircheck spell, I made sure I was ready for this. Double checking my story, I made sure it was safe for kids. The last thing I needed was to make sure that new spell I made for storytelling would work.

Now, I wait.

...

...

...

..-

The door swung open and Ms. Cheerilee was on the other side. She smiled.

“Hello Raspberry.” Cheerilee greeted.

“Hi Cheerilee.”

The mare stepped aside, gesturing me in with her hoof. “Come on in, the foals are excited about today.”

I smiled. “I’m sure they are.”

Cheerilee guided me into the classroom, there were a surprising amount of rooms in this place. Once there, I saw there were around twelve foals inside. Snips and Snails, Diamond Tiara (without her cutiemark I add), Silver Spoon, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, Twist, Featherweight, a pink foal that I think was Berry Punch’s daughter, Dinky Doo, and Lilac.

“Fillies and colts, this is Ms. Raspberry Stardust.” Cheerilee began. “She is going to be the school’s new storyteller.”

The twelve kids cheered, though a few looked less excited than the others.

“I’ll be in the next room working, so if Ms. Raspberry needs to she can come and get me. You may all leave when the 3 o'clock bell rings. Is that understood?” Cheerilee asked.

“Yes Ms. Cheerilee.” They all said.

Cheerilee smiled at them. “Okay then,” She started walking towards the door. “Oh, and, Ms. Raspberry?” I turned to her. “Have fun.”

The door shut, and it was just the thirteen of us.

“Well,” I said, slowly turning back to the foals. “Let’s get introductions out of the way. Fair warning, I may call you by the wrong name. If that happens, just let it slide. It will happen again.”

A couple of the foals laughed.

“Okay, let’s start on the front row.” I pointed at Featherweight. “You, state your name.”

“Uhh...Featherweight.” I moved my hoof to the next foal.

“Twist!” Next desk.

“Berry Pinch.”

“Snips.”

“Diamond Tiara, my daddy is-”

“Didn’t ask. Next!” I pointed a hoof at Apple Bloom.

“Apple Bloom. Hiya Raspberry.”

“Zup Bloom. Zecora says hi.” I aimed a hoof a Silver Spoon. “You!”

“Silver Spoon.”

“Dinky Doo.”

“And I’m Snails.”

“Sweetie Belle.”

“Scootaloo.”

“You know my name.” Lilac laughed.

“Yes, I do, but they might not. Name please.” I asked, laughing a little.

“Hehehe. It’s Lilac.”

“Lilac. Such a pretty name. Your mother chose...wisely.” I said.

“You chose it.” Lilac laughed.

“That I did, and I did chose...wisely.”

“Wait.” Diamond Tiara started. “You’re her-”

“Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!” I stopped her. “Raise your hoof. We’re civilised creatures.”

The rich filly groaned, but still raised her hoof.

“Yes? Jaded Crown?”

“It’s Diamond Tiara. And, why do you have a lizard?”

“That’s racist, Amethyst.” I said.

“Diamond!”

“Topaz.”

“Diamond!”

“Ruby?”

“Diamond Tiara!” The filly growled.

“Diamond Tiara?”

“YES!”

“No yelling. This is supposed to be a silent class.” I scolded lightly. The other students snickered. “And, to answer that, I adopted a dragon because nopony else could.”

I hopped into Cheerilee’s chair. It was thankfully one of those chairs that had wheels. I didn’t know they had those here!

“Now...who wants to hear about the time I fought a colt in a gas mask looking for his mommy?”

Berry Pinch raised her hoof.

“Yes, Berry Pinch?” I asked.

“Don’t storytellers tell ones about flutterponies or princesses or seaponies?”

“Or knights! And slaying giant monsters!” Snips added.

“Some do, but wouldn’t you rather hear a story from somepony first-hoof? ‘Cause I’ve slayed a couple monsters in my day.” I admitted.

“No you haven’t.” Silver Spoon said.

“You’re right. Slay is a rather harsh term. I defeated a couple monsters in my day. I’ve fought witches, warlocks, wereponies, vamponies, robots, aliens.” I leaned over the desk, “I’ve even fought a Dalek.”

Twist raised her hoof. “What’th a Dalek?”

“Imagine a pepper shaker holding a whisk and toilet plunger.”

“That doesn’t sound scary.” Diamond Tiara commented.

“You didn’t raise your hoof and does this,” I prepared the spell I had crafted and soon a projection of a Dalek appeared between me and the students. They gasped. “look dangerous now?”

“Exterminate! Exterminate!”

“Oops. Wrong clip.”

I thought over the memory of fighting Jamie. It appeared on the formed projection screen. But, ponified. I also closed the windows so it was darker in the room.

“Now, let’s begin on the cold streets of Great Britain. A country on a planet, far, far, far away...”


“Are you my Mummy?”

“Mummy?

“Where are you Mummy?”

“Mummy!”

They crowded around the four of us, all the victims of this horrible plague. We kept searching for a way out, we were utterly surrounded. Jack was aiming his sonic gun about, trying to intimidate them. It didn’t work.

“Doc, what the heck do we do?” I asked him as one of the gas mask wearing ponies nearly touched me. “What the heck do we do?!”

“And...! Fade to black.” I said, cutting off the spell and raising the blinds on the windows.

“Gah!” The foals recoiled, their eyes adjusting to the brightness.

“But it can’t end thare!” Apple Bloom called out.

“What about Nancy?!” Berry Pinch added.

“How did you get out!” Sweetie Belle added.

“Did you die!?” Scootaloo called out.

“Yes.” I said. “But that comes later during the Family of Blood.” I added. Getting out of the chair, I walked towards the door. “And, the rest of the story (which I call The Doctor Dances) I will tell on Wednesday.”

“Why would you tell us a story, but forget the ending?” Diamond Tiara yelled.

“Emerald Bracelet stop speaking out of turn.” I said. “I told you the story without the ending, because that’s how I was told stories. Bit by bit.”

*BRNNNNNNG*

“And that’s our cue to leave.” I opened the door with my magic and gestured out the door. “Next time, I’ll explain what happened next. Here’s a bit of a spoiler; this kind of ending only happened once.”

The foals groaned, but they still gathered their belongings for the end of the school day.

I think I did fairly well.


Tuesday.


The sun arose that glorious day, and I had but one thought.

Get that mother bucking sun out of my eyes.

*knock* *knock* *knock* *knock*

“Yes?” I half groaned.

“Mommy! Get up! It’s time for school!”

Oh, right, school happens five times a week. Now I know why I hate that place.

Getting myself out of the bed, I used magic to open the door.

Lilac was standing there, looking as if she had gotten a full night’s rest. Her scales were neatly brushed, I think I saw a twinkle as she smiled, and her claws looked sharpened.

“I don’t know if you should go today. You still didn’t tell me what happened yesterday.”

The day before, Lilac had returned home with me and I noticed a scuff mark of her head just above her eye and dirt in her head scales.

Her smile faltered for only a second. “Scootaloo and I were playing outside and I tripped.”

“I invented that trick, only I used Killjoy. What really happened?” I asked her.

“I told you, I played with Scootaloo and my new friend Sweetie Belle.” Lilac said, confidently.

Not knowing what else to do in my state of exhaustion, I shrugged. “Alright then, let’s get you ready for school.” And other things. “Hey, I forgot to mention. Ditzy Doo delivered the mail yesterday, and apparently all of your classmates are going to a party.”

“A party?!” Lilac cheered.

“By Pinkie Pie.”

“Pinkie Pie?!”

“At Sugarcube Corner.”

“Sugarcube Corner!?”

“For Diamond Tiara.”

“Diamond Tia- oh. Her?” Lilac stopped cheering, and her smile vanished.

“Yep. It’s to celebrate her getting her cutie mark last night. I thought it was pretty short notice, but if it’s that little snob I’m surprised they didn’t have it last night.” I said.

“Snob? What does that mean?” Lilac asked curiously.

“It means that somepony thinks they’re better than you, and try to make you think it. Personally, I just punch them and the problem takes care of itself.” Killjoy said as she joined in our conversation.

“That last time you did that, we were almost arrested.” I explained to her. Killjoy shrugged.

“Better arrested than spending another ten seconds with that bit-”

“Beep.” I said, covered Lilac’s hearing fins.

Killjoy groaned. She hated being censored.


I was walking across town, just aimlessly wandering about. There wasn’t really much planned for today, except for the party later. If you ask me, I found it strange that Diamond Tiara’s party was less than a day after gaining her cutiemark. Maybe it was a rich thing.

“Ugh...did you really have to drag me with you?” Killjoy groaned.

“Yes.” I said simply to the pegasus that was following a few steps behind me. “You still need to find a job by the end of the day.”

“Why?” Killjoy groaned.

“Because, I’m not gonna let you mooch off me...again.” I noticed a newspaper stand nearby and levitated a copy of Ponyville Gazette. I also placed two bits on the counter as payment.

Killjoy flew above me, probably trying to find a way out of this. “What if I-”

“No.”

“You didn’t even hear what I was gonna say!” Killjoy defended.

“True. You were either gonna try to make it as a vigilante, bank robber, or stealing pony’s animals and return them once they sent out Missing Posters.” I told the pegasus.

Looking over again, I saw we were at Sugarcube Corner. I headed inside and watched as Killjoy followed me without even glancing at what this place was. Stepping towards the counter, I saw Mrs. Cake at the counter.

“Hello Mrs. Cake.” I greeted.

The blue earth pony smiled at me. “Hello Raspberry. How are things going?”

“Great. I was finally able to find a nice place to work.” I said, glancing about at display case for something to eat.

“Really? Where?” Mrs. Cake asked, before Killjoy walked next to me. “Oh~. Who is this?”

I glanced at the blood red pegasus. “This is Killjoy. She’s with me.”

Mrs. Cake raised a brow. “Oh. Well, I didn’t know you were...with somepony.”

I raised a brow as well, exchanging glances with Killjoy.

We spoke together with twin telepathy.

“Do you know what the fuck she’s talking about Morgue?”

“No. I thought you would know.”

“Well I don’t. With somepony? What?”

“Somepo...shit! She thinks we’re a couple!” I exclaimed mentally.

Killjoy’s eyes widened, then she started laughing.

She looked as Mrs. Cake. “She wishes she was in a relationship with me.” Killjoy explained.

“In your dreams, maybe I do.”

“No, in my dreams you do something else.” My perverted sister said.

I groaned, rubbing my head as I felt another Darcy-ache coming. “Sometimes I can’t believe I’m related to you.”

“Related?” Mrs. Cake asked.

My amber eyes widened as the implication hit me. “We’re not dating. Killjoy is staying at my place because she can’t afford a place of her own.”

“I could so.”

“Then get a job.” I said sternly.

“Sure thing Mom.” Killjoy groaned, flying towards an empty table.

I rolled my eyes, and chuckled. “Sorry about her. She’s usually like that.”

Mrs. Cake smiled. “Oh it’s no problem, Raspberry. What would you like?”

“One chocolate cupcake with vanilla icing and one strawberry cupcake with cherry icing.” I explained.

The baker wrote my order down. “That’ll be four bits.”

I levitated the required bits up from my saddlebag and placed them on the counter.

“Your order will be ready in five minutes.”

Smiling, I walked over to the table to where Killjoy was sitting.

“You just love humiliating me in public, don’t you?”

The silver maned killer nodded. “More than you love humiliating me.”

“I don’t- yeah. I do.” I corrected. “So, I think I found the job for you.”

“Oh?” Killjoy asked. “Will I get payed for being lazy?”

“No.You’ll get paid to beat ponies up.” I explained, lifting up the wanted section of the newspaper.

“Say what?” Killjoy asked, glancing at the ads.

“Third from the bottom, fourth column.” I told her.

The pegasus found the ad, reading over it carefully before grinning happily. She wiped a fake tear with her hoof. “Oh, sis, you know me so well.”

The job? It was working as a bouncer at Ponyville’s only nightclub ‘The Frosty Mug’.

“NEW PONY~!”

Crap. I forgot about Pinkie Pie.

Slowly looking at my sister, I got the message she was trying to send via twin telepathy. “I’m going to kill you someday Morgue.”


I rushed towards the schoolhouse so I could pick up Lilac on time. The rest of the day had passed in a blur, the things I had been doing taking almost forever. It was mostly reading books I had checked out from the library when I helped Twilight clean up.

*BRNNNG*

Just in time.

The doors to the school opened and the foals all ran out. It didn’t take me long to see the sad faces of Apple Bloom and Twist.

“Hey fillies.” I greeted.

The red maned fillies looked up at me. “Hiya Miss Raspberry.”

“Hello Mith Rathpberry.” Twist greeted.

I raised a brow. “If I didn’t know any better I’d say you two are upset.”

“What maketh you thay that?” The future candy maker asked.

“Well, neither of you have smiled in the thirty seconds we’ve been talking.” I pointed out. “And, you’re heads are so low on the ground I’m surprised there isn’t a line from where they’ve been dragged across.” I noticed a pink little filly walk up with a silver one next to her. “And, I see Ruby Crown found her cutiemark. I can guess she rubbed it in your faces.”

The two nodded.

“Hey, have you two seen Lilac?”

“She stayed behind.” Apple Bloom said.

“Why?”

“Mith Cheerilee thaid.” Twist added.

“Got it trouble?”

“Yeah, and so did an orange pegasus. I think her name is Scooter.” Apple Bloom explained.

“Thanks.” I nodded at the fillies and walked into the school building. Cheerilee was sitting at her desk and my daughter and her friend were sitting at their desks. “What’s up Cheerilee? Anything wrong?”

My co-worker nodded. “Yes. Lilac, would you like to tell your mother what happened?”

The dragon shrunk into her seat.

“Lilac...” I started. “Did you get into a fight?”

She sunk lower.

“I’m not mad if you did. I’m more curious as to why.” I tried to add comfort. “So, let’s go over what could’ve happened. Did she make fun of Scootaloo?”

“How did you know it was a she?” Scootaloo suddenly asked.

“You just told me.” I said, smirking.

Scootaloo realized her mistake and facehoofed.

“Well, Cheerilee I think you know what happened.” I said, my gaze not leaving the purple dragon.

“She got into a fight with Diamond Tiara during recess.”

“I don’t see-”

“And then she tried to set the filly on fire.”

Smurf.

I raised a brow. “Did you follow Killjoy’s advice from this morning?”

Lilac shrunk lower, so low I thought she was gonna fall out of her seat, and nodded.

“Oh dear. Lilac, never listen to your aunt. She gives worse advice than those magic 8 balls.” I explained delicately.

“But Diamond-” Lilac started.

“You can tell me about it once we get home.” The mother in me said sternly. “Come on, Li.”

The little dragon hopped down from her chair, grabbed her backpack, and walked towards me. The dragon jumped up onto my back and waved. “See ya later Scootaloo.”

“Later Lilac.” The pegasus said.


I had sat the dragon down on the kitchen table, giving her the occasional glance as she did her homework. It was almost dead silent, even when Killjoy got back. The airheaded mare could feel the tension in the air and sat down on the table as if she herself had done something wrong.

Once Lilac was finished, I pulled up a chair next to Killjoy.

“So, Lilac, tell me what happened.”

Killjoy sighed a sigh of relief. “*phew* I thought I was the one in trouble.”

“No, you’re in trouble.”

“What? What did I do?”

“You were the one who gave the advice to punch Diamond Tiara in the face.”

Killjoy’s purple eyes widened. “She actually did it?!”

“No.” Killjoy sunk. “She tried to burn it off.”

Killjoy chuckled. “Nice.”

I chuckled too, imagining the image of a melting Diamond Tiara. She would scream ‘What a world! What a world...’.

“Hehehehe. Imagine her as the WWW.” I told my sister.

She got the reference and laughed, hard. “Oh my gosh! Bwahaha! It’s true!”

“Minus the green skin.”

“But other than that, it’s perfect!” Killjoy laughed.

Lilac looked between the two of us. “Wait...you’re not mad?”

“Mad?” I held back my laughter. “Why would I be mad? Sure, you tried to barbeque Diamond Tiara- hehehe- but you stood up for yourself. That’s what makes me happy.”

Lilac smiled, the nervousness I saw in her fading. “So...I’m not in trouble?”

“No. Just, next time remember the best form of revenge. Proving them wrong. Even if it takes years and years, show those ponies that did you wrong that you fought against all odds and became something greater!” I lifted my hooves into the air as I finished my inspirational message. “That’s what KJ and I did.”

“Really?”

“Heck yeah! We totally showed those losers!” Killjoy said. Her face blanked. “Wait...which one?”

“When you were six.” I reminded.

“Oh, you mean when you-”

“Yep.”

“And I-”

“Definately.”

“And when they called us-”

“You. But yes.”

“Oh, then yeah we showed them!” Killjoy cheered.

Lilac raised a brow. “You two are acting weirderer than usual.”

We shrugged. “We get that a lot.”

“Now. Let’s get going, DT’s party is soon.”


By the time the three of us made it to Sugarcube Corner, the party had already started. We had also run into a familiar orange earth pony.

“Hiya Applejack.” I greeted.

The farmer turned to my little group, a smile on her face until she noticed Killjoy.

I elbowed my sister. Killjoy glared at me until she realized what I wanted her to do.

“I’m sorry that I drugged you.” Killjoy groaned.

Applejack nodded. “‘pology accepted.”

The mare walked inside, stopping once she hit somepony trying to get out.

“Apple Bloom, ya made it!” She greeted her younger sister. “After Ah heard about Twist, Ah was afraid ya wouldn’t show up. Ah sure am glad ya came to yer senses about this whole cutie mark thang.”

Once Applejack was out of the doorway, the three of us made it inside.

“These things happen when these things are ‘supposed to happen.” Applejack explained to the panicking yellow earth pony. “Trying ta rush 'em just drives you crazy. Ah’ll let ya be, looks like yer friends want to talk to you.”

I patted Lilac on the back. “Have fun Li, I think I see Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle hiding under that table over there.” I gestured to a tarpless table where Apple Bloom had just yanked the tarp from to make a dress.

The dragon, noticing the direction Applejack was pointing Apple Bloom towards and the two bullies there, ran underneath the table to join the two fillies underneath.

“Ah, I remember when we used to hide under tables.” Killjoy reminded me.

I laughed, picking up two glasses of punch with my magic and walking towards a nearby table. “Yes, but we only hid because you punched Carrie in the face.”

KIlljoy shrugged, trying to get a grip onto her cup. “She was being a total bitch. I was allowed a punch.” My sister reasoned.

“Not while she was covered in” I glanced around to make sure nopony was listening “pigs blood and has telekinetic powers. If it wasn’t for my quick thinking, we would’ve died in there.”

“I did~.” Killjoy sang.

“Because you were an idiot~.” I sang back.

“Shut up~.” Killjoy said, finally get a sip of her punch.

“Hello Raspberry Stardust.”

Turning away from my struggling sister, I saw my second favorite pony.

“Sparkle of Twilight, oh what a delight.” I greeted.

“Great, now she comes in rhymes.” Killjoy groaned.

I laughed.

Twilight just smiled, but one of slight annoyance. “I forgot to ask you before, but...who is this mare?”

Killjoy held out a hoof. “Zup. The name’s Killjoy E. Pegasus. My skills included, but are not limited to: flying, a knowledge of almost every battle strategy known to the universe, twelve types of Tae kwon do, four types of karate, I know how to create any weapon you can think of, I know three languages, and!” Killjoy’s sentence slowly faded off.

Twilight and I stared at Killjoy in anticipation. I think Twilight was more annoyed.

“And!” She wrapped a hoof around my neck. “I am the only pony ever to piss Razzle of and get away with it.”

I laughed, wrapping a hoof around her own neck. “Or so you think. Maybe I’m just trying to plan my revenge.”

Killjoy chuckled. It came to a stop when she noticed the look in my eyes.

“Razzle, you are joking?”

I opened my mouth to speak, when suddenly the music stopped. The crowd of ponies gasped and turned towards the music player.

Three fillies stood around it. A fallen Apple Bloom, Silver Spoon and the filly of the hour, Diamond Tiara.

“Oh Lordy, here it comes.” I whispered.

“Wow. That is an amazing cutiemark.” Silver Spoon mocked towards Apple Bloom.

“Nice try…” Diamond Tiara started.

Blank flank!” The two snobs mocked.

“Can I kill them now?” Killjoy whispered to me.

“Don’t worry. I’m gonna make some extra punching bags with their faces on ‘um.” I whispered.

“Perfect.”

The other ponies started murmuring among themselves.

“You got a problem with blank flanks!” A familiar voice called out.

“What?” Diamond snapped.

“She said ‘You got a problem with blank flanks?’” Lilac yelled as she and the other two fillies walked out from under the table.

Silver and Diamond rolled their eyes. “The problem is, I mean, she’s like, totally not special.”

“You’re positive I can’t punch her?” Killjoy asked. I ignored her.

The three girls walked in front of Apple Bloom. Their faces determined.

“No. It means she’s full of potential!” Sweetie Belle encouraged.

“It means she could be great at anything! The possibilities are, like endless!” Scootaloo mocked.

“She could be a great scientist, or an amazing artist, or a famous author!” Lilac added.

Sweetie Belle patted Apple Bloom on the back. “She could even be mayor of Ponyville some day!”

Scootaloo aimed a hoof at the two fillies. “And she’s not stuck being stuck up like the two of you!”

Killjoy and I laughed, and hoof bumped.

“They grow up so fast.” Killjoy said.

Diamond scoffed. “Hey! This is my party! Why are you three on her side?”

“Because.” Scootaloo said. Her and Sweetie revealing their blank flanks to the other partygoers.

Apple Bloom gasped. “You don’t have yer cutie mark either! Ah thought Ah was the only one!”

“We thought we were the only two!” Scootaloo explained.

“And you’re really nice!” Lilac chipped in.

Twilight, who had abandoned my sister and I, walked up to the five fillies and one dragonette. “Well, I for one think you are three fillies.”

“Lucky?” Diamond asked, astonished. “How can they be lucky?”

Twilight’s muzzle shrunk back, like she had just smelled something awful, then it bounced back to a teacher’s smile. “They still get to experience the thrill of discovering who they are, and what they're meant to be.”

Applejack walked up to her sister. “And they got all the time in the world to figure it out, not just an afternoon.” She winked at the filly.

Ponies all around them started to circle around, asking the fillies all sorts of question and giving them all sorts of encouragements.

“Fighting against the bounds of society.” I commented. “Our little girl is growing up KJ.”

“Into a bright, shining rebel.” KJ wiped a fake tear. “Ah, she makes me so proud.”

The two of us laughed.

Some time later, once the music was turned back, the party was back on in full swing. I laughed once Pinkie had finally got up with Killjoy. The party would’ve been tomorrow afternoon, but apparently it was somepony’s birthday as well as the two days after. The Welcome to Ponyville Killjoy Party was gonna be on Saturday now.

Ponies had also started to notice the burnt cupcakes, so my Instant Cupcake Spell came in handy after all. My sister sure did like them.

Soon enough, the two of us sat watching as the four new friends made their way to an approaching table.

“Here it comes.” I said, levitating my hidden camera to get a good shot of the four of them.

“Here what comes?” Killjoy asked.

“The day that many will know as the day the Cutie Mark Crusaders were born.”

Killjoy back up, a brow raised. “Cutie Mark Crusaders?”

“The Most Chaotic Fillies in Equestria.” I explained to the mare.

“And you do realize that your ‘daughter’ is probably going to be one such filly, right?” My sister asked me.

I was about to laugh at her, before I noticed Lilac cheering with the three fillies and running off with them.

“Crud.” I facehoofed.


That Night


As I slowly entered my dream, I quickly felt the presence of Princess Luna. She always came on a Tuesday. Which was good, because I had six days to prepare. It was gonna be a treat tonight!

The Night Princess looked around the landscape I had created. It looked like the beginning scene from Raiders. There were three others there that Luna did not immediately know. The first was a foal version of Fluttershy and the other two were of the Cake Twins.

Luna, now a little foal, glanced about the large cavern. Her attire was much like Indiana Jones, but babified, pith helmet, jump rope and all.

“Ugh, this place gives the juice bugs!” Foal Fluttershy Finster squeaked, trying to hide underneath her pith helmet.

“We should go back.” Pound DeVille suggested.

“Very back!” Pumpkin DeVille agreed.

Luna, completely confused, only nodded. Ugh, she is not playing her role like she is supposed to.

The words I had hoped she would say filled the empty cavern, a couple bats flying off once they came. “No! We’ve gone too far to turn back now, yous guys! Now come on!” *crack*

The foals all nodded, galloping off towards the end of the cave.

“Why art all these ponies foals?” Luna asked, glancing down. “Why art We a foal?! Raspberry Stardust We demand answers!”

I ssh’ed her. “Shh! Luna, my favorite part is coming up!” I said, my words echoing off the cave.

“And, pray tell, what part is that?” Luna asked, trying to locate me.

“Ah!” Pumpkin Cake squealed as the trap at the end of the cavern started working.

It was one of those stompers that you see on conveyor belts. The ones that went up and down on a predetermined time line? Yeah, the three foals had found themselves trapped with that as their only exit.

“You should really get going, Luna Pickles. Who knows what those three could get into on their own.” I said, making sure I was wearing my own pink dress correctly.

After all, can’t have a good ‘The Rugrats Movie’ without a good Angelica right?