I slipped out of the library before the sun rose. I wasn’t sure why I was going to the Forest, but I felt that I had to. Twilight’s sudden, unharmed appearance after being thrown out of an airship was more than a little suspicious.
There were other problems with that, too, but I wasn’t ready to think about them. At the moment, I just wanted to see the place where she’d fallen.
The Everfree Forest was avoided by most ponies for some reason. Other than the giant monsters, unpredictable weather, and dangerous landscape, I didn’t see a problem with it. I entered the treeline and began making my way towards where I knew Twilight had come down.
I heard a small noise and stopped to listen. It was kind of like a slurp or a suck. Deciding that I had a few minutes, I turned towards the sound and began walking.
A pair of white-coated hindquarters came into view. The tail was blue-purple and styled. I cleared my throat.
Rarity’s head shot up. There was blood on her mouth and a dead squirrel in front of her.
“Catch you at a bad time?” I asked.
“You nearly startled me to death!”
“Weren’t super senses part of the whole vampire deal? Didn’t you hear me coming? Also, aren't you technically undead anyway?”
“Well, I must admit in the throes of bloodlust, my mind does tune out a bit.” She primly wiped her lips. “Ah, that was an excellent meal. I’ve finally found a good use for rodents!”
“I think it’s even creepier when you talk about it like it’s no big deal,” I said.
She gave me a dirty look. “You aren’t the one who has to pretend that it’s no big deal.”
“Fair point. Let me walk you back to town.” I didn’t really want to go further into the Forest anyway.
Twilight was freaking out about something when I got back to the library.
“I'm supposed to send Princess Celestia a letter every week telling her about a lesson I've learned about friendship! Not every other week, not every 10 days, every single week!”
“You last sent one on Tuesday,” said Spike.
“What’s today?”
“Tuesday.”
“I thought it was Saturday,” I said, frowning.
Twilight looked at me. “Some of us have schedules to keep! If I don’t send her a letter about friendship by sundown, I’ll be tardy!”
“Oh, please!” said Spike. “You're the most studious student ever! I'm sure the princess will forgive you if you miss one little deadline.”
“I'm afraid to take that chance, Spike. This is the ruler of all of Equestria we're talking about. The pony who holds my fate in her hooves! What if she doesn't forgive me?”
“Boom, to the moon,” I said.
Twilight nodded, completely serious. “Or worse, I'll fail! The Princess is my teacher. Do you know what teachers do to students who don't pass? They send them back a grade! But she won't just send me back a grade. She'll send me back to... magic kindergarten!”
I fell on the floor laughing. I had literally never heard anything so funny. Now that I thought about it, I had never literally ROFL’ed before, either.
Twilight ran off to find problems to solve. I decided to stay and work on a new design.
The airship had served well in the brief time that it had existed. While awesomely dangerous hydrogen was useful, I wanted to go a different route.
The oil well in Ponyville had begun to produce a little more since I had fixed it up. It was never intended to even pump oil in the first place, but with a few modifications I had it going. With the sudden supply of crude, there were all kinds of things I could do.
Rusty Nail at the hardware store had been kept busy finding parts for me. With a little help from Pinkie, who for some reason knew how to build helicopters, I was assembling a heavier-than-air flying machine. It was going to be epic.
That afternoon, I was startled by an explosion coming from the direction of Sweet Apple Acres. Looking out the window, I saw a rainbow-colored mushroom cloud rising above the trees.
Galloping as fast as I could, I reached the farm just as Twilight was departing. She’d apparently been witness to the events that had transpired and somehow they weren't quite the problems she was looking to solve.
“How did you like that?” said Rainbow. “I call it the sonic rainbomb!”
“It’s mighty useful,” said Applejack.
“Wow…” was all I managed to say. There was a crater where an old barn used to stand. It made me glad that Rainbow wasn’t still on the list of ponies that I wanted dead.
Trotting back to Ponyville, I thought about the problems that I still had with Twilight. Discord had called her “the main character.” Could this really be her dream instead of mine? But then, how was I thinking for myself? Also, what did her inability to stay dead have to do with it? It was all very frustrating to think about, and until Twilight calmed down I couldn't talk to her about it either.
Even worse, Twilight couldn’t seem to stick to any particular pattern. Why, right now she was grinning like crazy and watching the townsponies fight over something in a giant dog pile. I couldn’t see what it was.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“I needed a friendship problem to solve, and now I have one!”
“That’s nice.” I went back to the library.
A couple of minutes later, Pricess Celestia and Twilight came in. Twilight looked considerably saner than before. I checked out the window and found the pile of ponies was gone, too.
Twilight gave a brief rundown of the problem. She’d been looking for a crisis to solve, and had enchanted a doll so that every pony who looked at it would want it.
Celestia told Twilight that she didn’t actually need a letter about friendship every week. Just then, Twilight’s friends came bursting in and tried to stop Celestia from handing down punishment.
“She’s not actually in trouble, guys,” I said. “Well, maybe for cursing all the ponies in town, but not for missing a letter.”
They all apologized for not seeing the real issue that Twilight was having.
“Looks like you all learned a pretty valuable lesson today,” said Celestia. “Very well. I'll forget Twilight's "punishment" on one condition. From this day forward, I want you all to report on friendship lessons.”
“Suckers,” I laughed.
“That means you too, Valiant.”
I grumbled. “Fine.”
The Princess left and the other ponies wrote some feel-good crap about friendship. I left to go back to the Forest. I thought I was finally ready this time.
As I approached the site, I began to have doubts again, but pressed onward. I tripped over something and looked back. It was a dead rabbit with fangmarks on its neck. I sighed. Rarity would have to start cleaning up after herself a little better.
After a while longer, and I was getting close. The sun had set, but there was just barely enough light to get by on. I stopped, staring at a body on the ground.
The pony had a purple coat and mane. Her horn had been broken in the fall, and the skin was ripped open. Underneath, a silvery metal skeleton gleamed.
“I don’t believe this,” I said aloud. “Twilight was a Terminator?”