Vinyl was strutting down Canter Boulevard, basking in the glares she elicted from passing ponies as her massive weapon. She smiled and waved at a couple, who just stared in shock. She took a long drag of her cigarette, then spotted a familiar face.
“RARITY!” She yelled, waving her sword, “HEY RARITY!”
The purple maned mare turned around in confusion before finally spotting Vinyl. She walked up to her, gave a curtsy, and said, “Hello, Dame Vinyl,”
“Now that’s what I’m talking about!” Vinyl approved gleefully.
“If I may ask...what ARE you carrying?”
“Oh, this?” Vinyl asked, “Say hello to NoWacking!” she said as she pulled the long sword out of its sheath, making an audible singing tone due to the speed at which she pulled it out. Rarity staggered back.
“Gahhh…” Rarity said.
“Isn’t it awesome!? It just fell right into the bar at the Stone Pony, so I called dibs and now I’m a knight with a sword! I just got it registered down at the Guardhouse!”
“Very...did you say it fell into the bar?” Rarity asked, confused, “did you happen to see where it fell from?”
“I dunno, I was looking down...the sky, I guess?”
“Now, now,” Rarity said admonishingly, “things don’t just fall from the sky-”
“Rain does-”
“Well, yes, besides that-”
“And snow-”
“-or that-”
“And hail-”
“-OR that-” Rarity said frustratedly.
“Sometimes lightning-”
“WILL YOU QUIT IT, DAME VINYL!?” Rarity screamed at her friend, who reeled back, “all of those things you named are types of weather, and swords are most decidedly NOT a type of meteorlogic phenomenon!” she ended, breathing heavily.
“Sheesh, Rares, ya didn’t have to go psycho on me!”
“I’m sorry,” Rarity said, “but we simply must find out who that sword belongs to-”
“Nuh-uh, I called dibs on it!”
“Now, now, do you think the LAW will recognize your claim of ‘dibs’ on stolen property?”
“Well, uh...maybe?” Vinyl said with a toothy grin, taking another drag of her cigarette.
Rarity wrinkled her nose, clearly miffed at her friend’s habit, “Now, we simply have to ask around this...’Stone Pony’ to find out where that blade fell from,”
Vinyl groaned, “Ok, but if nopony claims it, I call dibs!”
----
They asked around the Stone Pony, Rarity more and more shocked to claims that it dropped through the roof of the establishment and into the counter of the bar at what appeared to be terminal velocity.
“See, told ya!” Vinyl said while sticking out her tongue at Rarity.
Rarity huffed, “Dame Vinyl, that behavior is most unbecoming of a mare of your stature!”
“Says who?”
“Says me!”
“Well you’re no expert! When was the last time you met a Knight Commander?”
Rarity gave pause at that, searching her memory. She found, to her dismay, that she couldn’t recall ever meeting a Knight Commander, or a knight of any sort.
“I can’t recall...but it couldn’t be any different than the rules of nobility-”
“But ya don’t know, do ya?” Vinyl said, sticking out her tongue again.
“And that’s certainly no way to treat a lady,” Rarity grumbled.
Vinyl stuck out her tongue again.
“Stop that, Dame Vinyl…”
Vinyl stuck out her tongue yet again.
“I said stop it!”
Vinyl said, “For all you know, this could be a secret greeting that shows great respect among Knights!” as she stuck out her tongue.
“Ooooh!” Rarity squealed as she stomped her hooves on the ground, “I, for one, find your behavior most unbecoming!”
Vinyl giggled as she took out another cigarette and lit it, taking a drag.
“And I find that habit of yours most deplorable! Who knows what you’re inhaling?”
“I know,” Vinyl said, exhaling smoke, “it’s tobacco, a plant. It comes from the earth. How bad could it be for me?” taking another drag as she finished her sentence.
“It’s just the idea of inhaling something on fire that I find so repugnant! And what’s in the paper that you wrap it in, huh?”
“Pure tobacco leaf,” Vinyl said without missing a beat, blowing out a thick cloud of smoke.
“No matter, then,” Rarity said, “we’ll just have to go to somepony who WOULD know about raining swords?”
“And who might that be?” Vinyl said, inhaling more smoke.
“Why none other than Princess Celestia!” Rarity said proudly.
“Ugh, let’s go,” Vinyl said, exhaling more smoke, “why are you interested in who this sword belongs to, anyway? I filed out the proper paperwork, and that says it’s mine!”
“Don’t you find it strange that a sword would fall out of the sky?”
“Not really,” Vinyl said, taking another drag, “Ponyville’s kinda desensitized my strange-o-meter a while ago,”
“Nevermind that, let’s head to the castle!”
“Fine,” Vinyl agreed, exhaling more smoke.