The aftermath of battle feels ...weird.
There’s really no other way to describe it. While the bugs had been on us, there hadn’t really been any time to slow down and think. My brain had been running a mile a minute,
But now all of that was over. We were still trying to piece together what exactly happened, but most of the reports said that Shining Armor and Princess Cadance had managed some kind of spell to toss the bugs out.
It was over.
Well, aside from repairing all the damage the bugs had caused. Not to mention taking care of all the casualties. The things had gone to a lot of trouble to take ponies alive whenever they could—no point in wasting perfectly good food—but we had still lost ponies. I had lost ponies.
A shiver went down my spine at the thought.
While the battle had still been ongoing, I’d just kind of turned off several parts of my brain so I could stay focused on what was going on around me. There hadn’t been time to think about stuff like how I’d feathered up and let a group of bugs hit our field hospital. Not beyond the most immediate terms, like how to salvage the situation and make sure the changelings didn’t get past our defenses again. When you’re in the middle of a crisis, there just isn’t any time to stop and beat yourself up over your screw-ups. At least, not unless you run into magical armor that tests your worth.
Now that the battle was over, now that I finally had enough time to sit down and think for a bit, it was all catching up to me. The battle. The consequences. My decisions. My mistakes. Making a decision in the heat of the moment is easy; it’s dealing with that decision after the fact that’s hard.
I’d kept things together long enough for the Guard to show up, and for some proper doctors to start taking care of our wounded. Long enough to make sure Dad and ‘Lula were okay. Lyra’d been found wandering the streets of Canterlot, lost and confused, so at least she was alright. Rainbow and Fluttershy had gotten out of the fight with nothing more than a few bumps and bruises; apparently Chrysalis was too busy gloating to get around to cocooning them. I think as long as I had everypony else to worry about, I could manage to hold off thinking about myself. All of that had been taken care of now, though.
So there I was, sitting in my bedroom, staring at the blood and ichor stains on my armor and shaking like a leaf.
I’m not sure how long I’d been like that when Fluttershy found me. She didn’t say anything, she just walked up to my side and wrapped a single wing around me. After a bit she reached up, slowly undoing one of the clasps that held my wing-blades in place. Once they were off, she moved on to my armor, and then finally my helmet. When all my wargear was sitting on its stand again, she pulled me in for a proper hug, her hooves rubbing my back as she guided my head to her shoulder.
We didn’t say anything. I guess we didn’t really need to. She just held me, and that was enough.
Once I’d settled down, she took my hoof and gently led me to the bathroom. I wasn’t sure what she had in mind, but I went along with it. I’m not sure I could’ve mustered up the willpower to say no to her at that point anyway.
Her intentions became clear pretty quickly, as she dampened a washcloth and began rubbing it along one of my cheeks. It came away with bits of blood, ichor, and changeling goop.
Oh. Right. I guess I was probably messy after the whole battle against the changeling army thing. For that matter, I’d gotten some of it on Fluttershy when she’d hugged me. Eepy didn’t complain about that, naturally. It just wasn’t in her nature to do something like complain about getting dirty in the process of giving a hug to a pony that needed one.
I winced and pulled back a bit when the washcloth passed over the cut I’d put on my cheek to prove that I wasn’t a bug. It’s easy to ignore those kinds of injuries in the heat of battle, when you’ve got a ton of adrenaline pumping through your system. Once you’re not in the middle of a fight, your body actually starts worrying about things like pain again.
Fluttershy pulled back and let out a sympathetic little murmur. “I’m sorry, but I need to clean the wound. I’ll be as gentle as I can, but it’s going to hurt a bit. It’s the only way you’ll get better, though.” She used her free hoof to hold my head in place, and quickly got to work cleaning the cut. It stung, but I wouldn’t be much of a big, tough, semi-ex-guardpony if I couldn’t deal with a little bit of pain. Once she was done, Fluttershy beamed at me and ran a hoof over my belly. “That was very good, you were so brave.” She grinned and scratched behind my ears. “Who’s a good girl?”
I gave Fluttershy a flat look, and after a couple seconds she flushed with embarrassment. “Sorry, Cloud Kicker. I’m just used to taking care of animals, not ponies.”
I chuckled and leaned forward to give her a quick nuzzle with my freshly cleaned cheek. “It’s fine, Eepy. Honestly, it’s kind of cute.”
That remark got a smile and a faint little blush out of her. “Thank you, Cloud.” She poked around in my medicine cabinet, found some disinfectant and a bandage, and got to work on binding the wound. “Cloud?” There was a moment of hesitation before she continued. “There’s something I wanted to talk to you about.”
That reminded me of what all had happened when I was trying to get Shadow’s Armor. A couple of rather difficult truths about what had happened between the two of us had gotten shoved into my face, and it was past time I dealt with them. “Yeah, there are a few things I’d like to discuss with you too. Now’s as good a time as any to get it done. You want to go first, or…?”
Fluttershy’s ears wilted slightly. “I don’t mind waiting. I’m sure whatever you wanted to talk to me about is much more important.”
Oh, I did not want this turning into another one of those times when Fluttershy was so focused on being kind that she wound up causing more problems out of a misplaced desire to make me happy. That’s how we’d gotten into our current mess of a relationship to begin with. “Eepy, why don’t you go first? Please?”
“Well, if you’re sure...” Fluttershy took a deep breath, and then the words literally exploded out of her. “I lied to you. There isn’t anypony else I’m interested in. There never was. There’s only you. And I lied to you because I wanted you to be happy with Blossomforth and Derpy, and I’m sorry because I shouldn’t have lied to you but I just wanted to make you happy and I know that makes me a terrible pony but I still love you and—”
I cut her off the only way I could. With my lips. For a second she froze in shock at the kiss, but before long she was gently returning it. I held it long enough for her settle down a bit, then gently backed off. “It’s okay, Eepy.” I thought it over, and amended, “Well, it’s not okay, exactly. I would’ve preferred honesty and trust, but at least you lied because you were trying to make me happy. That doesn’t make it alright, but it does count for something.” I let out a self-deprecating chuckle. “Besides, I’m not really in a position to criticize anypony for how they handle themselves in a relationship.”
“Oh.” Fluttershy’s ears wilted even as she shifted closer to me. “But—but where do we go from here? I don’t want to get in the way of—”
I gently interrupted her. “You’re not in the way, Eepy. You could never be in the way.”
“What about you and Blossomforth?” she demanded. “Or Derpy? I care about you, Cloud, but it just wouldn’t be right for me to hurt other ponies just so I can be happy.”
I sighed and tried to come up with a more diplomatic way of phrasing things. I couldn’t really pull it off, not after the day I’d gone through. “Eepy, it’s not much of a secret that we still care about each other. I think that in a lot of ways, trying to hide from that just makes it worse.” I gave a bitter, humorless laugh. “If there’s one thing I’ve been getting hammered into my head lately, it’s that trying to run away from your problems just ends up making the problem even bigger than it was before. I think ... I think it’s past time we sat down with Blossom and Derpy, and had a big, long talk to sort all this out. We need to reach a point where all of us are happy, or at least as close to that as we can manage. And all of us includes you.”
It also included me. That was part of where I’d gone wrong with Derpy: I’d wanted to keep our relationship working so badly that I’d stopped working at making it something that made us both happy. On some level, I’d started resenting her for pushing me towards monogamy when I didn’t want that. But instead of facing her over the issue, I’d just tried to say some nice words to reassure her and preserve the status quo. Once again, I’d avoided the problem and made things worse.
Fluttershy and I sat there in silence for a bit, then she picked the washcloth back up and started cleaning me again. It felt good, having her wash me off. Like she was doing more than just getting all the grime out of my coat. It didn’t just make me feel clean, it made me feel purified. It was silly, but just sitting there and letting her run that washcloth over me felt like an almost spiritual thing. Like it wasn’t just the literal dirt she was taking away, but all the metaphorical taint that had accumulated from the battle.
Or maybe I just really needed a bath.
Once I was feeling up to going out in public again, there was only place to go: the hospital. Dad, Alula, and Lyra were all there. I’m pretty sure they’d moved Cirrus and the other wounded ponies from the compound there too. Better facilities, and all that.
Unsurprisingly, the hospital was completely packed with ponies. There were a lot of wounded ponies after the attack on Canterlot, and even more ponies looking for loved ones they’d gotten separated from during the fight. I imagine the Guard would be very busy for the next few days tracking down all the ponies who were MIA after the attack. Most of the cases would just be ponies getting separated in all the chaos and needing some help to find each other again. Hopefully, there wouldn’t be too many ponies missing for other reasons—at least the changelings’ sudden ejection from Canterlot meant they wouldn’t have been able to take anypony with them.
After a bit of hesitation, I went to check on Dad and ‘Lula first. As worried as I was about Lyra, family is the most important thing. It probably also helped that Dad was enough of a VIP that some of the hospital staff knew his name when I started asking around. Top-ranking guardponies do draw some notice, especially in the aftermath of an invasion.
Apparently, he was also important enough to actually get a private room—it was a small one, but after a major attack hospital bed space was going to be at a premium. When I found them, Dad was lying in bed holding Alula. My sister was sleeping, but from the way she was twitching and groaning in her sleep she wasn’t sleeping very well. Probably nightmares. Shadow knows she’d been through enough to give anypony some bad dreams. Dad was so focused on my sister that he didn’t even notice me walking through the front door. “Dad. I’m here.”
His ears perked at my voice, and he turned to face me, letting out a relieved sigh. “Cloud.” From the look on his face, I think he would’ve given me a nearly Pinkie-level hug if he wasn’t already holding my sister. I trotted over and settled in on Alula’s other side, hugging the both of them. There wasn’t anywhere near enough room for one filly and two full-grown ponies on a single hospital bed, but right then I didn’t care. I needed to hug them, so I found a way to make it work.
Dad held me for a minute or so; apparently he was so relieved to see me that words weren’t necessary. I wound up breaking the silence with the obvious question. “Are you and Alula okay?”
“We’re physically unharmed,” he answered, his eyes drifting down to my fitfully sleeping sister. “The changelings captured us, but we weren’t fed on.”
I let out a relieved sigh, and tightened my hold on both of them. “I was so ... I didn’t wanna lose you too, Dad.” He gave me a reassuring squeeze. “And Alula ... I hope she never has to see another changeling again. Those damned bugs have already put her through too much.”
Dad grunted and protectively cradled my sister. “I’ll need to talk with Wind about getting her some help. She’s ... been through a lot of things a filly her age should never experience.” He sighed and shook his head, then turned to me. “I heard you saw some action at the Compound.”
The change of subject was rather abrupt, but I could hardly blame him for not wanting to linger on the topic of my sister’s psychological damage. “Yeah, the bugs came after us. Not as hard as they could’ve—once we bloodied their muzzles, they mostly left us alone to focus on softer targets.” I thought back to the way the bugs had hit our field hospital. “Mostly.”
Dad set a hoof on my shoulder. “You lost ponies?”
I nodded, and my voice came out as a faint whisper. “Yeah, I lost some. The ones that were just bad luck I can handle, but ... I made mistakes. The bugs managed to slip one or two tricks past me, and other ponies paid the price for it.” I sighed and shook my head. “Having ponies feathering die because I screwed up is ... yeah.”
“Happens when you’re in command,” Dad answered as gently as he could. “Remember what you learned at West Hoof? A lot of battles aren’t about who has the most clever ideas, but just who makes the fewest mistakes. You did the best you could.”
“I’m not sure if that was good enough,” I answered, slumping down into the bed. “Feathers, I was the officer in command. You should’ve seen how all those ponies were looking at me. Like they were counting on me to get them through that whole crazy mess in one piece. It was ... I think for a while I was more frightened by all that responsibility than I was by the invading bugs.”
“Leadership isn’t easy,” Dad agreed. “You make mistakes, and other ponies pay the price for them. But somepony has to be in charge—all you can do is try to handle your duties to the best of your abilities. If you held the compound, you kept a lot of civilians from being taken by the bugs. That counts for a lot.”
“Yeah, I know.” I sighed and scooted closer to him. “S’crazy, isn’t it? I never figured I’d be fighting off an army of shapeshifting bugs. I’m a nymphomaniac weatherpony, not a warlord.” I groaned and shook my head. “Stupid of me to try and pretend I could still be a soldier when I was years out of practice.”
Before Dad could come up with an answer to that, he stiffened in bed to sit up and salute. Considering there was only one pony in the Guard who outranked him, it wasn’t hard to guess who must have walked in. I turned around, and sure enough the Captain of the Guard was standing in the doorway. After a bit of indecision, I saluted too. After all, I was technically in the reserves, and I didn’t want to be the odd pony out while the two of them did the whole Guard thing.
If Shining Armor thought there was anything weird about me saluting him, he didn’t comment on it. After he returned our salutes, he made the usual polite inquiry into how Dad was faring. Dad pretty much repeated exactly what he told me, though he left out some of the more personal stuff about Alula.
The Captain of the Guard heard Dad out and then surprised me by turning to me. “I’ve heard you saw some action too, Lieutenant.” He paused, frowning thoughtfully. “Or should it be captain?” He shook his head. “Way too confusing when you’ve got one rank in the Guard and another in your clan’s militia. I think I might just have to promote you so I can keep everything straight.” He paused, looking over at Dad. “I’ve heard you were thinking of coming back to active duty. After the way you held the line against the changelings, I don’t think there’ll be any objections to it.” He paused, and his ears went flat against this head, his voice taking a quieter, mournful tone. “There’ll probably be plenty of openings too.”
I winced at that. “How many did we lose?”
“Too many.” Shining Armor sighed and walked over to a couch, slumping down onto it. “Gonna be a while before we get an exact count, especially since we’re still taking stock and finding everypony the bugs cocooned up. They took ponies alive whenever they could, but...” Shining Armor trailed off, letting out a bitter little grunt. “It doesn’t seem fair, does it? The strongest out of us were the ones most likely to end up dead because the bugs wouldn’t be able to take them alive. The only ponies who got captured were the ones who were too weak to put up a good fight.”
Considering the fact that the bugs had captured Dad, I resented the implication. From his scowl and the way his ear started twitching, Dad had picked up on it too. “I was dressed for the wedding, sir, not for battle. I think I gave a good account of myself until they captured my daughter.” Dad looked down at my sleeping sister and gently stroked her mane. “It was stupid of me to surrender and let them capture both of us, but ... it’s hard to think rationally when a monster has your child.”
Shining Armor blinked in surprise, then threw his hooves up in surrender. “No, wait, I wasn’t trying to say that you...” He trailed off, looking a lot more shaken that I would’ve expected out of the Captain of the Guard. “Sorry. It’s been a long day.” He let out a humorless little chuckle. “You know how it goes. You wake up looking forward to your wedding day, and then next thing you know your bride’s turned into a mind-controlling bug monster who wants to take over the world.”
Oh, right—Rainbow and I had kind of gotten the identity of the changeling wrong. In fairness, Twilight Sparkle had been acting a little crazy, and neither of us had really known Cadance well enough to realize that the whole bridezilla act was out of the ordinary for her.
“Yeah, the bride turning into an evil monster would put a bit of a crimp in the wedding plans.” It seemed weird for me to be telling jokes at a time like this, but I was getting kind of used to trying to find the humor in even the worst parts of life. It reminded me of one of those corny old sayings I usually don’t put any stock in: sometimes ponies laugh because it hurts too much to cry. “Look on the bright side: at least you found out she was giant evil bug monster before you said your ‘I do’s.” Or got around to consummating the marriage.
“I suppose that is something,” the Captain agreed. “I don’t even want to think about what my in-laws would’ve been like.” He paused, then shook his head. “Guess it wouldn’t have made too much of a difference, though. We’ve gotten word that Princess Luna and the border guards caught the changelings right after Cadance and I threw them out of Canterlot. Hit them hard before they even knew what was happening.” A hint of a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “Her Highness was disappointed when Princess Celestia refused to let her mount Chrysalis’s head on a pike over the gates.”
“So we got her? Good.” From what I’d seen and what Princess Celestia had told me, Chrysalis wouldn’t stay dead for long, but it was still rather satisfying to know she hadn’t gotten away cleanly. If nothing else, it would take them time to rebuild their numbers.
Shining Armor nodded emphatically. “Hopefully, that’s the last we’ll see of the changelings for a long time. Hay, after this maybe the Sisters will start looking for a way to get rid of Chrysalis for good.” From the sounds of things, Shining Armor was carrying just a bit of a grudge against the changeling queen. Not that I could blame him for that. He took a deep breath and calmed down a bit. “Getting back to the good news, your niece Storm acquitted herself very well in the battle. Luna’s putting her up for a commendation: her platoon found the bug queen and kept her pinned down until Luna could come in to finish her off.”
“Sounds like she earned it, then.” For a brief, bitter moment, I wondered if Storm would have had any trouble getting past Shadow’s test. I had a feeling she would’ve passed; she was a bit more of a traditional Kicker than I was. Hay, she was only out of West Hoof for a year and a half, and she had already gotten a promotion and the attention of one of the Sisters. That mare was going places.
It did sting a bit, realizing that in all likelihood Dad would hoof clan leadership over to Storm instead of me when the time came. I wasn’t bitter about it, mind you. Well, not anymore. I guess the whole thing with the armor and bugs had put a few things into perspective for me. I wasn’t exactly happy about being shown up by my little cousin, but I think a couple weeks back it would’ve gotten under my skin a lot more.
The thing was, I think I’d finally gotten past the point of feeling like going into the Guard was something I should have done. When I’d been in that state of mind, Storm’s successes would’ve bothered me a lot more because somewhere in the back of my mind I would feel like they should’ve been my successes. Now ... well, it was a lot easier to just feel happy for my cousin. “Good for her. I think she’s already planning to be the next Captain of the Guard once you retire, Shining Armor.”
I’d meant it as a bit of light-hearted ribbing, but Shining’s face fell as soon as the words left my mouth. There was an awkward silence, and then he murmured. “Don’t think she’ll make it in time.”
That got Dad’s attention. Mine too. “Sir?”
Shining gave a resigned shake of his head. “Tor, you know there’s been a lot of talk about how being married to a princess means I’ll have a ‘conflict of interest’ and ‘divided loyalties’ and all that. After everything else that’s happened today, you can bet there’ll be more of that.”
“What do you mean ‘after everything that’s happened?’” I demanded. “Look, I’m not your biggest fan by a long shot, but from what I’ve heard it was you and Cadance who pulled off the spell that kicked the bugs out of Canterlot.” I might not have backed off on believing that Dad was the best pony for the job, but I couldn’t deny that Shining Armor had some impressive spellwork.
“Sure,” Shining conceded. “But the only reason the bugs were even able to attack Canterlot in the first place was that Chrysalis got into my head.”
“You really think anypony’s gonna give you grief over that?” I let out an annoyed little snort. “Okay, it’s been a while since my training at West Hoof, but I’m pretty sure that when I took my classes on resisting mind control they said something about how some entities were just too strong for anypony to fight them off with pure willpower. I’m pretty sure a bug queen that took out Celestia in single combat qualifies.”
Shining Armor gave a frustrated shake of his head. “Maybe, but I didn’t even get a chance to fight her. She was wearing Cadance’s face, and I didn’t see it coming until she was already in my head. And that was probably after she’d fed on me a couple times to build up her strength.” He paused, and a shiver of revulsion went down his spine.
Dad went silent for a few seconds, then quietly offered, “I’m sure you know that my sister’s discretion is absolute, if there’s anything you need to discuss with her, sir.”
The Captain of the Guard closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. “I’ll take that under consideration, Tor. Anyway, like I was saying, she got the drop on me. I tried to fight her off a couple times, but I never really managed. Closest I got was disagreeing about a couple wedding arrangements, and that time I tried to warn your daughter.”
“Yeah, sorry I missed that.” In my defense, his effort at passing along a warning had been so vague that there hadn’t been anything remotely actionable. “I’m guessing she had your brain locked down pretty hard by that point.”
Shining gave a reluctant nod. “Yeah. I could barely say two words to the Princesses, my sister, the other Element-bearers, or anypony high-ranking in the Guard without having the compulsion kick in. Not that she gave me much more freedom with anypony else; after the wedding rehearsal she just turned me into a puppet. And the whole time, even when she had me take down the shield, I just ... I couldn’t stop her.” He slammed a hoof onto the floor. “The Captain’s got to be better than that.”
“Shining.” Dad’s voice was gentle, but firm; the way he’d talked to me whenever I was going through some rough times. “Go spend some time with Cadance. I can handle whatever comes up.”
The Captain went silent for a couple seconds, then offered Dad a small nod. “Thanks, Tor.” Without another word, he turned around and left the room.
Once Shining Armor was safely out of earshot, I asked the question that had been burning in my mind for a while. “Is he really going to lose the captaincy?”
“Seems likely,” Dad answered shortly. “He’ll probably take charge of Cadance’s personal guard, but he can’t keep his current position. Too many potential complications. What he did today might actually hurt his case; if his love for Cadance is that powerful, what happens if Cadance’s needs come into conflict with those of Equestria?”
I scowled at the door. “That’s not fair. Don’t get me wrong, a big part of me wanted him out of the Captaincy so you could take it, but ... not like that.”
“Military politics can get nasty.” Neither one of us said anything after that. Really, what was there to say? It seemed like every time we finally got a bit of good news, something new had to crop up to spoil the mood.
Dad finally broke the silence with some very good advice. “Go check on your friends. They need you more than I do.”
He was right about that, but there was one more thing I needed to do before I left. I hugged him. “Love you, Dad.”
“You too, Cloud.”
Once I wrapped things up with Dad, my next stop was the nearest nurses’ desk. After all, I couldn’t check on my friends if I didn’t know where to find them. Canterlot General was a huge hospital, and in the aftermath of the attack things were very chaotic. I could’ve spent hours wandering around randomly and probably not find any of the ponies I was looking for. As it was, it took one of the orderlies nearly half an hour to get me the information on where I could find everypony. It probably would have taken even longer if not for the fact that the staff assumed I was somepony important since they’d seen me talking to the Guard’s leadership five minutes earlier.
Lyra and Cirrus were my top priorities. I wanted to check up on everypony who’d been at the compound—it felt like it was my responsibility to check on everypony who’d gotten hurt under my command—but making sure my friends were okay was the most important thing. Call me biased, but ponies I actually knew and cared about mattered more to me than relative strangers.
Cirrus was still in surgery, so visiting him wasn’t really an option. I’m sure Sparkler was probably sitting in a waiting room and worrying, but until the doctors finished with her uncle there wasn’t much I could do for Sparkler other than wait with her. Lyra, on the other hoof, was in the psych ward going through post-mind-control treatment. I didn’t know too much about how that kind of thing was treated, but I was pretty sure after what she’d been through Lyra could use a good friend.
On the way to the psych ward, I tried to remember everything I’d learned about mind magic in West Hoof. It wasn’t very much; unless they’re specializing in warlock hunting, non-unicorns only get a single semester’s worth of education in magic. A pegasus needs to know the basics of unicorn magic so they’ll know how to use any unicorns under their command and how to deal with hostile spellcasters, but you’ll only get so much value out of teaching anypony without a horn about spells.
Still, I knew a few things about mind control. I knew it was the kind of dark magic that could get a unicorn fast-tracked to getting a reform spell, though that obviously wasn’t a concern for Chrysalis. I also knew that it caused all kinds of problems for the victims, beyond the obvious issues of having your free will taken away. Minds are complicated things, and having something break in and start messing around can cause a bunch of nasty side-effects.
Shining Armor probably got spared the worst of it. Chrysalis might have been in his head for longer, but she’d needed him to act relatively normal, and had plenty of time to sink her hooves into him. That meant she used a subtler, more delicate touch on him. With Lyra and the other bridesmaids, on the other hoof, there had been no reason to be gentle. As I understood things, mind control was a lot nastier for the victim when it was done quickly, and pushing Lyra to the point where she would try to outright murder Star would’ve required utterly dominating her will. Both of them lost their free will, but the slow and subtle way had fewer side-effects.
Bearing all that in mind, I was pretty worried about how Lyra would be handling everything. Chrysalis had probably scrambled her brain pretty badly, and then she would have to deal with the guilt of attacking Star and the trauma of whatever else Chrysalis put her through. I had a feeling she was going to be putting in a lot of hours with one of Aunt Wind’s counselors before she was back to normal.
I followed the directions I’d gotten from the orderly, stopping every once in a while to make sure I was still going the right way. Once I got to the psych ward things got a lot less hectic; most of the hospital was packed with ponies who’d been hurt during the battle, but this area was practically deserted. Most likely, a lot of the staff had been pulled away to help deal with all the other patients. Any nurse or doctor will do in a crisis, and long-term mental patients could wait while the more immediate problems were dealt with. I was a little surprised they’d moved Lyra down here—probably just a matter of saving bedspace for ponies with physical injuries.
Since the psych ward was operating with skeleton staff, there weren’t any ponies around to give me directions to Lyra’s room. It wasn’t too hard to work out the numbering system and find her, but the extra delay was still bothersome. The longer I had to think about what Lyra was going through, the more I worried about her. When I finally reached her room, I nearly forgot myself and just barged through the door instead of remembering to knock and quietly enter.
Lyra was in bed, and one glance was all I needed to confirm that I wouldn’t be able to do much to comfort her. She was sound asleep, and judging by the restraints on her limbs I had a feeling she wasn’t just taking one of her usual afternoon naps. That wasn’t a good sign for her mental health; the docs wouldn’t have sedated and restrained her unless she was in really bad shape.
I was a little surprised to see that Bon Bon was already there, since Lyra hadn’t mentioned her being in town. I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised, given how the two of them generally stick so close together that I’m surprised they haven’t fused into a single pony. LyraBon. Or would it be BonRa?
Bon Bon’s presence wasn’t the only surprise. She was dressed up in a set of chainmail that, judging by the crest, had come from my clan’s armory. I didn’t remember seeing her in the compound, and even with all the chaos and confusion of the battle I’d like to think I wouldn't have missed Bon Bon completely. Then again, I’d take overlooking Bon Bon over the far grimmer explanation of how she could’ve gotten Kicker armor; that she’d gotten it from one of my militia mares who couldn’t use it anymore.
I settled down next to Bon Bon, and slowly wrapped a wing over her shoulder. “Hey.”
Bon Bon jumped in surprise at my touch, tearing her eyes away from Lyra and doing a double-take when she realized I was sitting right next to her. “Cloud? When did you—I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you come in. I guess was too focused on...” She trailed off, her eyes already slipping back to Lyra again.
“It’s fine, Bon Bon.” I couldn’t blame her for being so caught up in worrying about Lyra that she wasn’t minding her surroundings. I’d probably be the same way if it was Fluttershy, Blossom, or Derpy in the hospital. I glanced down at Lyra and gently smoothed out her mane. “How is she?”
Bon Bon stared down at Lyra for so long that I was about to repeat the question when she finally answered me. “She’s safe now, and the changelings didn’t hurt her.” She sighed, and shook her head. “...Physically,” she amended. One of Bon Bon’s hooves gently stroked Lyra’s forehead, while the other rested over her heart.
I tried to think of something I could say to comfort Bon Bon, but the only thing I could think of was the usual useless platitudes about how Lyra would be alright. For lack of a better idea, I settled on being honest with her. “From what Star said, the Bug Bitch Queen really got into her head. For what it’s worth, apparently Luna chopped her head off. Won’t keep her from coming back eventually, but...”
Bon Bon gave a single grim nod. “Just knowing she’s dead for now helps.” She fell silent, rubbing one of Lyra’s forelegs. “She’s been asleep since they brought her here. It’s for the best, I suppose; she probably wouldn't recognise you if she was awake. When I found her, she almost didn’t even remember who I was.”
I pulled her into a hug, trying to silently reassure her. There weren’t any words that wouldn’t sound like empty reassurances, but a hug is always genuine. She returned the hug almost desperately, reminding me that she was a lot more muscular than you would expect from a pony who sold candy for a living.
Now that I was up close and personal with her, I could tell that Bon Bon had seen some action. Nothing too serious, but there was a bit of changeling ichor in her fur, some bruises, and a few shallow cuts that nopony had gotten around to bandaging up yet. I hadn’t really checked myself in the mirror recently, but I probably looked about the same way. Well, except for the fact that Fluttershy had helped clean me up and put some bandages on. “Looks like we both saw some action.”
Bon Bon offered a single dull nod. “Yeah, I guess we did. I’ll tell you my story if you tell me yours.”
“I held the compound against a couple waves of bugs, protected everypony I could, and eventually managed to bluff the Bug Bitch Queen out of attacking us long enough for Shining Armor and Cadance to kick her out.” Huh. When I said it like that, it sounded like I’d done a hay of a lot more than it actually felt like I had. “What did you get up to?”
Bon Bon looked down at her bedridden lover and grabbed one of her forelegs, squeezing it. “Saving her. We were staying with her parents, and after Cadance replaced her as a bridesmaid and she didn’t come home the next day...”
“You went looking for her,” I finished. I glanced over at her armor, particularly the unmistakable clan crest on her chainmail. “Mind if I ask where you got that? It does technically belong to my clan.”
Her ears went flat against her head, and her tone was faintly apologetic. “When the changelings broke through the shield, I took cover. I wanted to find Lyra more than anything, but even I knew I couldn’t fight my way through an entire army to get to her. Once they stopped landing all over the place, I went looking again, and found a group of ponies that ... well, they weren’t going to be using their gear anymore, and I didn’t want to wander around Canterlot naked and unarmed.” She must have run into one of the patrols I’d sent out to try and find out how the battle was going for the rest of Canterlot. So much for hoping all of them had just gotten cut off or captured.
Bon Bon was looking a bit nervous about the fact that she’d looted gear from my clan, so I put those fears to rest. “I’m sure they would’ve been happy knowing their equipment was used to take the fight to the bugs for a bit longer.” I didn’t mention that most of the chainmail had gone to the civilians we’d conscripted into service. Bon Bon didn’t need to know that I might be talking out of my plot.
Bons pointed at a large, ichor-stained mace sitting in the corner of the room. “I did try to put that to good use. I'm not a soldier like you are, but my parents were blacksmiths who did a lot of work for the Guard. I helped around the shop, and you can’t really tell if you’ve made the weapon properly unless you have some idea of how to swing it. You know, to check the balance and such.” A grim smile made its way onto her face. “I don't think those monsters expected us to put up much of a fight. They might feed on love, but I don’t think they really understand what it is, or how much it means to us.” She took one of Lyra’s hooves and pressed it to her cheek. “I'd always go down fighting. Especially for her.”
“I know exactly how you feel.” I’d been ready to put Shadow’s Armor on, even though there was an old family legend that putting it on meant dying. At the time, it had seemed like the thing to do. Now that the battle was over ... well, I didn’t like the idea of dying. Life was good, and I liked being alive. I still think I made the right call trying for the Armor, though. There are a hay of a lot of ponies I love, and if it came down to it, I’d die to keep them safe. Even if protecting the ponies I care about wasn’t a factor, I wasn’t the kind of pony who would just roll over and let a bug monster take over Equestria.
Bon Bon and I sat together for a few minutes, just silently being there for Lyra. The silence was finally broken by Bon Bon shuffling around in her seat slowly working her way out of the armor. She met my eyes and shrugged. “You'll want your armor back, right?”
“It does kinda belong to the clan.” I reached over and squeezed one of Lyra's hooves. “No need to rush on it, though. You’ve got more important things to worry about than a borrowed suit of chainmail.”
Bon Bon offered a simple nod, her attention returning once more to her fillyfriend. “I don’t know if she’ll be able to hear us, but is there anything you want to say?”
There aren’t that many things to say to a pony who’s sedated in a mental ward after having a bug crawl around in her head and mess everything up. “I'm sorry, Lyra. Get better soon, okay?”
I felt Bon Bon’s hoof settle onto my shoulder. “You can't blame yourself for what happened to her, Cloud. It’s not like you could have anticipated Princess Cadance being an evil shape-shifting bug monster, and you certainly couldn’t have guessed that Lyra was being mind-controlled when you sent Star to go find her.” She paused, and gave me a teasing bump in the shoulder. “Besides you know what Lyra would say if she heard you getting all mopey and acting like you owed her something.”
Despite the circumstances, I felt a smile creeping onto my face at the thought. “Yeah. She’d call me a goof and bop me on the nose, then suggest a threesome.”
For the first time since I’d walked into the room, I saw a hint of a smile on Bon Bon’s face. “You left out the part where she would do all of that while sitting on your couch, eating your food and drinking whatever alcohol you had in the fridge.” She shook her head and let out a sad little chuckle. “All she’s ever wanted from you is for you to be happy.” She paused, and nudged me again. “Well, that and a good bang every once in a while.”
I smiled, and snuck a quick feel of Bon Bon’s nicely developed flank before she playfully swatted my hoof away. “Lyra always did have excellent priorities.”
Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “You just like her because when it comes sex she has almost as much of a one-track mind as you do.”
“Almost,” I agreed. We shared a laugh at that, but the jovial mood didn’t last very long. It was rather hard to stay upbeat when we were both sitting next to a knocked out and traumatized Lyra. I got back to business before things could get too grim. “You need anything, Bons?”
She let out a pained sigh. “The list of things I need right now could go on for hours, But right now it’s hard to think of much beyond needing Lyra to be okay.” She paused and frowned. “I'll have to put my business on hold to look after her, so things might get a little tough for us, but she’s more important than bits.”
As romantic as that line of thought was, ponies making sacrifices in the name of love still need to buy groceries. Thankfully, I could help with that issue. “If things start getting hard for you, I've got some bits saved up.” Growing up as a Kicker had left me with enough of the clan’s traditional stoic asceticism that I didn’t really spend a whole lot of money on needless luxuries. I liked to pick up a good book or some extra-nice food every once in a while, but at the end of every month a decent chunk of paycheck went into savings. Especially after the raise that came along with being promoted to assistant weather manager.
Bon Bon shook her head. “I'm hoping it won't come to that. You’re not the only pony who has bits saved up. Thanks, though. I appreciate the offer.” She set her head on my shoulder and took a shaky breath. “For right now, all I really want is for you to be here. I'm not asking you to devote all your time to us, but I don’t want to be alone. Other than Lyra’s parents, I don’t really know anypony in Canterlot. So, it’d be great if you could stop by every day and just be you. That kind, brave, sexy, and maybe a little bit too-loving mare that we adore.”
“I can definitely do that.” I shifted around in my seat, feeling a bit guilty as I confessed, “I’m afraid I can't stay too much longer, though. Sparkler’s probably freaking out somewhere worrying about her uncle, and I ought to check up on the ponies who came here from the compound. They got hurt under my command, the least I can do is stop by the hospital and ask them how they’re holding up. Plus I’d like to find wherever Rainbow’s gone off to at some point; Fluttershy already told me she’s fine, but...”
“You’d like to see her for yourself,” Bon Bon finished for me. She paused, then offered a reluctant nod. “I guess I understand that—we’re not the only ponies you have to worry about right now.” She reached over and put a hoof on my chest. “Just one thing: while you’re busy running around and trying to take care of everypony, just remember that if you ever need somepony to talk to, you can come find me.”
“I'm fine, Bon Bon.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I could tell they weren’t entirely true. They certainly didn’t sound remotely convincing.
From the frown on Bon Bon’s face, her horseapples detector was working just fine. “Don't lie to me, Cloud. At the very least, don't lie in front of Lyra.”
Ouch, there was a double-helping of guilt. Nothing for it now but to fess up on some of what was on my mind. “I was in command during the fight. A fight where a lot of ponies ended up coming here, and others weren’t that lucky.” I held up a hoof to forestall any objections. “Yeah, I know you’re going to say that I did the best I could, I already heard that from Dad. I know it’s true, but I’m still gonna need a bit to wrap my head around ... well, all of it.”
I was surprised when Bon Bon leaned over and nuzzled my cheek. “This might sound out of place, but I'm proud of you. You could've run or left command to somepony else. But you didn't. You stood up for the clan. No, not just the clan, you stood up for Equestria itself. Perhaps in the grand scheme of things it doesn't seem important, but I think it is. I bet if you asked all the ponies you kept safe in your clan’s bunkers, they’d say the same thing. You did a good job, and don't you dare think otherwise.”
Um ... wow. By the end of her little speech, Bon Bon had started sounding really passionate. I hadn’t expected her to react that strongly. I guess she just really cared about me. “Noted. Thanks, Bons.”
Bon Bon paused, and a faintly embarrassed flush passed over her cheeks. “Sorry, I got a little worked up. It’s been a long day, and ... I'm just glad you're safe..”
I pulled Bon Bon into another hug, just because. “Same here. I’m glad you’re safe, and that Lyra’s gonna be okay.”
Bon Bon shot a worried glance at her fillyfriend. “I hope so. I don’t know what I’ll do if she ... Celestia, give me the strength to pull through this.”
I gave her a reassuring little squeeze. “You've already got it, Bon Bon.”
“You think?”
“I know.”
She nodded, and a bit of her usual self-assured confidence came back to her. “Yeah. I fought through an army of changelings to find her; I’m not going to lose her now.” She went silent, and that brief burst of confidence slowly ebbed away. “I know you have other ponies you need to check on, but you can stay a little bit longer, right?”
I leaned over and nuzzled Bon Bon’s cheek, then planted a kiss on Lyra’s forehead, drawing a sleepy smile from her. “Yeah, I don’t have to leave right away.”
It took me ten minutes to actually find Sparkler in the hospital’s waiting room. Canterlot General Hospital has a pretty huge one, and the place was packed to capacity with ponies. On top of all the ponies who had friends and family injured in the attack, you had all the ponies checking at the hospital because they didn’t know where their loved ones were. In the aftermath of an attack like this, the hospital is one of the first places ponies check for anypony they can’t find. Odds were, there were quite a few happy reunions happening in this very room. Maybe not very many, but even one was enough to count for something.
The place was actually getting so crowded that some guardponies had come in to maintain order and make sure nopony interfered with the hospital staff. They were starting to turn ponies away from the waiting room on account of overcrowding, but lucky for me one of ponies on duty was a Kicker. Well, maybe there wasn’t that much luck involved; it’s a running joke in the clan that every single squad in the Guard has at least one Kicker in it.
Once I let Blaze Kicker know what was going on, he let me into the waiting room and I got busy looking for Sparkler. I found her plonked down near the reception desk, staring blankly towards the doors that lead to the operating room. Her eyes were dull and unfocused, like she wasn’t even really paying that much attention to what was going on around her. She’d taken off the chainmail she’d worn during the battle, but there were still a few bits of changeling ichor and blood on her. I was pretty sure that as soon as the fight was done she’d tossed the armor off, rushed over to the hospital with her uncle, and hadn’t moved from her current position since.
A quick look at the pony occupying the seat next to Sparkler was enough to get the message across, and he reluctantly shifted over. I settled in next to the teenager and wrapped a wing around her. She jumped slightly at the contact; apparently she was either so focused on the door that she’d missed my approach, or she’d just zoned out worrying about her uncle. “H—hey, Cloud. Doin’ alright?”
Considering our relative states, I don’t think Sparkler needed to waste any time worrying about me. Fluttershy cleaning me up had done a lot to help me re-center myself after the battle. “I’m alright. How’re you holding up?”
“I’m fine.” Despite her claim, Sparkler looked the exact opposite of fine. She jerked her head towards the operating room doors. “I haven't seen him since they brought him in. One of the orderlies told me to wait here and they’d lemme know once they were done, so I've just been ... waiting.”
I pulled her in a bit closer, and added a foreleg to the wing I’d put around her back. Right now, I figured Sparkler needed all the comforting she could get. “Hey, some of the best docs in Equestria work here. He’ll be fine.”
Sparkler offered a shaky, disbelieving nod. Well, not exactly disbelieving, more like she wanted to believe me, but her cynicism wouldn’t let her. “Yeah, sure, best docs and all that, but there’s not enough of them to go ‘round. S'not like I'm gonna tell 'em to drop everything and work on Uncle Cirrus, but—” She cut herself off and her ears perked up when she spotted some activity near the OR doors, but when nopony came our way she slumped back down, giving a resigned wave of her hoof. “A lotta ponies went through that door.”
I couldn’t argue with that, so I opted for trying to reassure her instead. “They'll do everything they can for him. ”
“They do that for everypony,” Sparkler grumbled. “My uncle deserves more.” She paused, her ears drooping down as she added in a quiet, frightened whisper. “Their best isn’t enough, sometimes.”
I tightened my hug on her, and threw in a gentle little nuzzle for good measure. Worrying about Cirrus was unavoidable, but I really wanted to snap her out of the depressed, dead-on-her-hooves funk she seemed to be in. Having her just sitting here feeling miserable wasn’t going to do her or anypony else any good. First things first, I needed to get her brain back to working again. “When’s the last time they updated you on his condition. Is he still in surgery? Has anypony given you a rundown of how they think his chances are?”
Sparkler blinked several times as the barrage of questions slowly began restarting her mind. “I dunno. I've just been here since...” She frowned as she tried to piece together the memories. “...dunno. Since whenever I came here with Uncle Cirrus, I guess. It‘s all kinda a blur. I didn’t really talk to anypony or anything, just followed him here, and then one of the nurses told me to go sit in the waiting area. Then you showed up.”
Yeah, Sparkler was seriously out of it. I guess being in shock was to be expected, after everything that she’d been through. For an untrained civilian, she’d handled herself incredibly well during the battle. Now that she wasn’t running on adrenaline and desperation, everything she’d been through was starting to catch up with her. Toss the post-battle shakes on top of what happened to her uncle, and it was no surprise she was a bit of a wreck. I decided on more questions, this time unrelated to Cirrus. Anything to get her mind off of that for a few minutes. “I kinda figured Star'd be with you, what with you two practically having your tails tied together these days.”
Sparkler’s ears perked up at the mention of Star, and a little more life came back into her previously dull eyes. “It’d be nice to have Star around, but I know she's probably got her own things to deal with first. Y’know, with your clan's militia and stuff.”
I had no idea where my cousin was at the moment, but I could make a pretty reasonable guess. “Last I heard, they're still finding all the ponies the bugs captured. It'd be something Star could really help with.”
“That’s probably where she is, then,” Sparkler concluded. “I kinda understand what Rainbow meant about how you Kickers get about duty. One minute Star’s my awesome smartflanked marefriend, but bring up duty and she gets all grim and serious.” She took a deep breath, and forced a smile. “Still, she’s fine. I mean, you're asking about her, so that means she was okay the last time you saw her.” Sparkler paused, and a small hint of panic slipped into her eyes. She didn’t say anything, but I could practically hear the unspoken ‘Right?’ at the end of her last sentence.
I moved quickly to calm her fears. “Yeah, Star's fine. There’s no way any bugs could be left in the city after the barrier went up, so she's safe.” Sparkler let out a relieved breath and settled a bit further into my hug, seeming to finally relax a little.
Sparkler spent a while just letting me hold her, gradually getting more and more comfortable. I might not have Dinky’s skill with get-better hugs—I wouldn’t be surprised if that filly ends up getting a hugging cutie mark—but I like to think I’m reasonably skilled when it comes to comforting embraces. Plus, I’ve got wings. I swear, one of the most important secondary uses for a pegasus’ wings is big, soft, feathery hugs. Nopony can resist them.
Sparkler rested her cheek on my chest, and took a few deep breaths. “Thanks. Needed that.” She paused, and her ears drooped down a bit. “Y’know, it really sucks that things didn’t work out with you and Mom. Gonna miss having you around.” She let out a sad little chuckle. “And just when I was starting to think that as far as stepmoms go, you could be a pretty cool one.”
“Yeah, I’m not a big fan of the whole evil stepmother cliche, so I decided to buck the trend.” My voice shook a bit when I delivered that bit of snark. I’ll admit, I’d never given much thought to the whole idea of motherhood, step or otherwise. Well, beyond stuff like ‘I’d better use protection so I don’t end up pregnant.’ Still, I’d kind of settled into something of a maternal-like capacity for Derpy’s girls while we’d been a couple. I’m not saying I was a full-fledged mother figure to them or anything, but I’d like to think I moved a bit beyond just being their slightly-less-cool-than-Rainbow honorary aunt. Even though our last talk had put me back on semi-amicable terms with Derpy, I wasn’t sure I would get to keep that special relationship with Dinky and Sparkler. To be honest, the thought of losing that hurt almost as much as losing Derpy herself.
I offered a nonchalant grin, and dropped a maternal little peck onto Sparkler’s forehead. “I guess you did kind of grow on me, kid. Sort of like a weed in my front lawn.”
“S’what happens when you get lazy and forget to keep a close eye on it,” Sparkler shot right back, finally getting back to her usual smartflanked self. She paused, and then gently nuzzled my chest, right over my heart. “Hey? Think for the next couple minutes, we could kinda forget all that stuff happened, and just pretend? I could use a mom right about now.”
I tightened my grip around her, and felt an odd lump in my throat. “Yeah, sure thing.”
She smiled and squeezed me back. “Thanks ... Momma.” She shot a sassy little grin up at me. “Gotta call you something a bit different, otherwise I’ll mix you up with Mom.”
“Rainbow goes with Awesomom and Cool-Mom,” I suggested. “Amazing-Mom, Super-Mom, and Damn-Sexy-Mom would also work.”
“Momma?” Sparkler gave me a sharp little poke with her horn. “Stop spoiling the moment.”
I went back to just hugging her. “Fine, fine. Sheesh, I’ve been a mom for less than a minute, and I’m already having to give up on my fun to be responsible.” I let that remark stand for a bit, then gave in to the inevitable. “Aw, to hay with it. You’re worth the trouble.”
We stayed snuggled up for a while, just watching and waiting. Every once in a while, an orderly would show up and pull somepony aside, presumably for news about whoever they were waiting for. From the reactions, it looked like the news was good, more often than not. I don’t think that would be much consolation to the ponies getting bad news, though.
My mind drifted over to thinking about my family, which naturally lead to Sparkler’s family. “Have you gotten word to Derpy yet? Let her know you're okay?”
Sparkler blinked in surprise, and her face slowly fell. “Um ... not yet, no. Horseapples, I didn't even think about that. She's gonna be worried outta her mind when she hears about what happened!”
“Yeah. It’d be good if the first thing she hears about the attack is that you’re safe.” Otherwise, once news of the attack on Canterlot reached Ponyville, Derpy would either force her way onto the next train headed our way or just fly here directly if getting a train ride would take too long. No, scratch that, she’d be rushing to Canterlot even if she got a letter from Sparkler saying that everything was okay. Not to mention Cirrus’ condition.
Sparkler let out a pained sigh. “Yeah, I need to let her know what’s going on. Just gotta wait until I know more about...” She trailed off, and waved a hoof towards the doors. “Besides, s’not like I can leave to go find a post office right now. Even if there was one working, it’d mean ... I gotta stay here until I know, y’know?”
“Yeah, I know how you feel.” In the aftermath of the attack, finding any way to get word back to Ponyville wasn’t going to be easy. Despite Sparkler’s comment, sending a normal letter through the post office was an option. Even if things weren’t a big chaotic mess, Derpy wasn’t going to wait for however many days it would take a letter to work its way through the postal system. This news was a bit too urgent for conventional channels. “Want me to find a way to get the news to her?”
She thought it over for a bit, then slowly shook her head. “I'll get it. Thanks, but s'kinda something I wanna do myself. Soon as I know how everything else is gonna work out, I’ll see about getting in touch with her.”
I set a hoof on her shoulder. “Yeah, I figured I would leave what to say up to you; I’d just work on finding a way to get in touch with Derpy at all. It’s gonna take some doing to get word to her before the news hits Ponyville.” Assuming everypony there didn’t know something was up already. Being perched on the side of a mountain does make Canterlot highly visible.
Sparkler frowned in thought. “Yeah, I guess it’s not like we can wait for the mail system to do its thing. Especially with how clogged up things’re gonna be now.” She gave a slow nod. “Yeah, thanks. I'll get something ready to send off once I know what’s gonna happen.
“Agreed.” Things went quiet again for a while, until I remembered that I should probably say something to help her through the post-battle shakes. She was probably going to need some time with a counselor before this was all over, but I could at least give her a little comfort. “Hey, Sparkler? You did real good, back at the compound.”
The teenager blinked in surprise at the sudden change of subject, but adapted quickly enough. “Thanks. I dunno where any of that magic stuff came from, really. I just—there were bugs all over the place and Uncle Cirrus was hurt and you were down, and then next thing I know—well, you were there, you saw what happened next.”
“Yeah, I did.” Judging by the display I’d seen during the battle, I had a feeling that whenever they got around to testing Sparkler’s magic level, it was going to turn out pretty high. Probably Beta-level, though I wouldn’t rule out the bottom level of Alpha. Star would probably try to get her to apply for the Mage Corps, but I couldn’t really see Sparkler in the Guard. Still, I wasn’t just thinking of her as a spellcasting battery. “I wasn’t talking about how good your laser spell was, although that was a pretty nice piece of work.”
“Oh.” She shot a hesitant, almost shy look at me. “...Really good, huh?”
“Yeah, really good.” I confirmed. “I bet Derpy would be so proud of you.” I paused, then nuzzled her forehead. “I know I am.”
Her uncertain little smile widened considerably. “Thanks. Means a lot to hear you say that.”
“You earned it.”
She perked up a little bit more at that, smiling and nodding. “Yeah, guess I did.”
We went back to silently waiting after that, with Sparkler snuggling up with me again. I was a little surprised when I realized I wasn’t suppressing any dirty thoughts about the nubile young teenager curled up with me. Now, even on my worst day I wouldn’t go chasing after Derpy’s impressionable teenage daughter, but sometimes a mare can’t help noticing things. Except that I wasn’t. Instead, I just held her, and did everything I could think of to help her feel better.
Guess Sparkler was right when she said I’d make a good stepmom.
Our silent companionship lasted until Sparkler spotted one of the hospital staffponies talking to a couple of stallions. I guess she must have remembered how I’d quizzed her on Cirrus’ condition earlier, because once the mare was done talking to the stallions, Sparkler flagged her down. “Hey, excuse me! You got a minute?”
The mare trotted up, wearing the faintly annoyed frown of somepony who has a long and stressful day, and doesn’t need any more worries. Sparkler shuffled self-consciously at the nurse’s obvious irritation, but didn’t back down. “Sorry, I know you’re probably really busy and stuff, but my uncle's back there and I haven’t heard anything about how he’s doing since they brought him in. Um, his name’s Cirrus Doo, he's a sergeant. I've been waiting for a while now.” Her eyes dropped to the floor, and she let out a worried murmur. “I just wanna know if he’s alright, y’know?”
Sparkler’s barely restrained nervous terror seemed to break through the nurse’s understandable case of weary cynicism. She offered a sympathetic smile and spoke in a gentle, reassuring tone. “I don’t know anything about him, but I can check. Do you know which unit he was in?”
“Unit, er—Machwing Company,” Sparkler answered.
“He would've come in with the Kicker casualties,” I added in. “He was one of the wounded who made it to the compound for sanctuary.”
The nurse’s face shifted to the carefully neutral professional mask. “I’ll check, and let you know what I find.” I could guess at her reasons: most of the wounded guards the changelings had brought in as cover for their sneak attack had been in bad shape, and then the sneak attack had cost us most of our doctors and medical supplies. Considering the circumstances, it was likely that not all those guardponies made it. All I could do was hope for Sparkler’s sake that Cirrus was one of the exceptions.
After the nurse trotted off to get our info, there wasn’t much for me or Sparkler to do except sit and wait for a bit longer. I couldn’t really think of anything to say: most of the reassuring phrases that came to mind would’ve just made things worse by making her think of all the bad things that might be happening. I stuck with just holding her; it’s pretty hard to screw that up.
The nurse came back a couple minutes later, her professional mask still carefully in place. “Come with me, please.” That was probably a good sign. If Cirrus was in really bad shape, she would probably be acting more sympathetic to try and soften the blow. Then again, if the news was good she would probably be smiling. Well, unless she had a rotten bedside manner.
Sparkler and I got up and followed the nurse as she led us deeper into the hospital. I stuck close to Sparkler, who was looking even shakier now that we were about to find out what had happened to her uncle. From how hard she was leaning against me as we walked down the corridors, I had a feeling she wouldn’t have been able to stay standing without me there for support.
The nurse led us to a small, well-insulated room strategically laced with seat-cushions and several tissue boxes. That definitely did not bode well. “Please take a seat, the doctor will be with you shortly.”
Sparkler and I settled down onto the cushions, and she let out a resigned sigh. “Great. More waiting.”
Thankfully, this time we weren’t kept waiting for very long. After a couple minutes, a doctor who looked even more worn down than the nurse who’d escorted us here stepped through the door. His scrubs and white coat had several specks of blood on them, there was a surgical mask hanging down from his neck, and his brown mane was a frazzled mess. He levitated a clipboard up, and quickly read over it. “You’re here about Sergeant Cirrus Doo, right?”
Sparkler bolted to her hooves fast enough to give an uncomfortable yank on the wing I’d been keeping wrapped around her back. “How is he? What about his wing? Is he okay? Can I see him? Is he awake yet? And what—”
The doctor quickly cut her off before she could unleash the next dozen questions on him. “Easy, miss. First things first, I’m Doctor Lancet, and I was one of the surgeons working on your...” He glanced down at the clipboard. “Your uncle, right?” When Sparkler nodded, he continued. “Alright then. We’ll start with the good news: he's alive, he's out of danger, and he should be able to recover and lead a full life.”
I let out a relieved sigh at that, even though I could tell there was still bad news coming. At least he was going to be alive. No matter how bad the inevitable bad news was going to be, none of it could top the news that he was alive.
Sparkler didn’t seem to share my tiny bit of optimism. She’d relaxed a little at hearing that her uncle was alive, but there was still a quiet sense of dread hanging over her. Like she was tensing for the other horseshoe to drop. When she spoke, her voice carried a sense of quiet resignation. “And the bad news?”
Dr. Lancet took a deep breath, then lowered his clipboard and looked Sparkler in the eyes. “While your uncle can still lead a full and happy life, he is going to have to make some very difficult adjustments. If you’d prefer, I could spare you the details, and just—”
“I’d rather hear it all,” Sparkler answered, swallowing. “He had to deal with having it happen to him. ‘Least I can do is know about it.”
The doctor took a deep breath, and gently put a hoof on Sparkler’s shoulder. “Very well. His right wing was badly lacerated near the lower joint, where the radius, ulna, and humerus meet. I'm not familiar with changeling anatomy, but they seem to have considerable bite force. All three of the bones suffered severe compound fractures, and despite our best efforts...”
“You couldn't save his wing,” I finished. I hate to say it, but I wasn’t surprised by that. His wing had looked pretty bad when they brought him in, and a couple hours in the medical bunker with no real treatment probably didn’t do him any favors. For a moment, I wondered if preventing the changelings from pulling off their ambush would’ve been enough to let him save his wing. It’s probably a mercy that I’ll never know the answer to that.
Dr. Lancet offered a single grim nod, and I felt a twinge of sympathy pain in both of my wings. Not being able to fly is one of those nightmares just about every pegasus has at some point. Now Cirrus would have to live it. The doc tried to force a bit of optimism into his tone. “Prosthetics have advanced very quickly over the last couple of years. There aren’t any flight-capable designs in production yet, but there a few that can handle very simple gliding, and given a little more time...”
I pulled Sparkler into another hug, and as soon as she was in my forelegs she started shaking like a leaf. The trembles passed after half a minute or so, and she gave one of my legs a single squeeze, then gulped down a breath. “C—Can I see him?”
The doctor gave an understanding nod. “He was heavily sedated, so he won’t be waking up for some time yet, but he'll be moved to the recovery ward shortly. I think it would be best if he had family at hoof when he wakes up. If possible, we’ll have a counselor on hoof too: it’s usually best to have a professional to help.” He checked his clipboard again, then jotted down a quick note for us. “You’ll find him in room 42; here are directions to the ward. I'd take you there myself, but...”
“S’alright.” Sparkler sighed. “Probably got another dozen patients waiting on you while you’re talking to us. Thanks for—for doing everything you could.”
“Thank you, miss.” Dr. Lancet paused, and offered one last sympathetic look for Sparkler. “I’m sorry for your loss.” With that he trotted out, probably to take care of the next trauma case, or give somepony else news on their loved ones.
I held onto Sparkler for a bit longer, until she gently pulled herself out of my hooves and stood up, shakily heading for the door. I wasn’t completely sure if she wanted to be alone with her uncle, or if I should get to work on finding a way for her to get word to Derpy, so I decided to ask. “Need me to come with, Sparks?”
Sparkler paused at the doorway, then turned back and gave a single trembly nod. That was all she needed to say; I quickly trotted up to her and planted my side firmly against hers. After a moment of self-conscious hesitation on account of Cirrus’s injuries, I put a wing over her back too. Sparkler jumped at that, then took a slow breath and leaned over to very gently nuzzle my wing.
A short walk through the hospital’s packed halls brought us to the recovery ward. Sparkler froze in front of the double doors to the ward, then licked her lips and very slowly walked through. The ward itself was slightly less packed and frantic than the waiting area, but there were still a whole lot of ponies visiting their loved ones, not to mention the constant shuffle of beds as patients were shifted out and brought in.
After a little searching, we found Cirrus’ room. There was another pony in the room, but the privacy screen was up and we could hear the quiet murmur of voices on the other side. Cirrus was lying on his left side with a bunch of bandages wrapped around his torso, though only for about a hoof-length on each side of his wing-joint. Maybe it was a little selfish, but I was incredibly grateful for the fact that there were so many bandages and so much padding over the joint that I couldn’t really tell how much of his wing was left. I have a feeling that if I’d gotten a good look at the injury itself, whatever was in my stomach would’ve ended up on the hospital floor. For that matter, I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d eaten. Breakfast? Shadow, this morning felt like it had happened ages ago.
Cirrus was still out cold, and from what Dr. Lancet told us, that was going to be the case for a while yet. I’d imagine they have to put a pony under pretty heavily in order to handle an amputation. He was still hooked up to an IV and a bunch of the usual monitoring machines, and from what little I could tell by looking at all the devices, he was in decent shape. Or at least none of them were shrieking and beeping the way they do when something’s wrong.
Sparkler let out a small whine from the back of her throat upon seeing her uncle, and trotted over to the side of his bed. She spent a minute just staring blankly at him, as if she was trying to find some way to make sense of what had happened to him. I settled in place next to her, and she latched onto me with quiet desperation. When she finally broke her silence, her voice was thick with hollow exhaustion. “That letter to Mom's gonna have to wait for a bit. S’gonna be a while before ... y’know ... s’just too much.”
I offered her a sympathetic little squeeze. Anypony would be overwhelmed by all this, but especially a kid like Sparkler. Sure, she was old enough to be an adult in some legal senses of the word, but right now she was very much a scared kid. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Find some way to let Mom and Dinky know I’m okay,” she answered dully. “Find a way to get Mom over here. Find Star.” Her gaze dropped to the floor, and she whimpered out, “Some way to lemme wake up and have all this be a bad dream.”
I gave the only answer I could. “I’ll do everything I can to help, okay?”
“Thanks.” She gave her uncle’s foreleg a squeeze, then turned to face me. “Hey, Cloud? Think you could pretend to be my stepmom for a bit longer?”
“Of course.” I pulled Sparkler in for a full body hug, doing my best to project an appropriate air of maternal-ish-ness. I’ve got no idea how that works, or even if it works, but judging from the way Sparkler buried her face into my chest and held onto me for dear life, I must have been doing something right.
The two of us sat there for a long while, just waiting for Cirrus to wake up. To be honest, I was starting to feel a little torn about keeping Sparkler company. I mean, she obviously needed somepony to stick with her, and I wasn’t about to leave her all alone under these circumstances. However, I hadn’t even gotten to checking on the other ponies who’d been at the compound, not to mention Dad, Alula, and Lyra were still here too. I didn’t want to leave Sparkler hanging, but I had a lot of other ponies I wanted to check on too. That’s the problem with caring about lots of ponies; sometimes all of them need you at once, and you have to pick and choose.
I decided to at least stick with her until Cirrus woke up. Once he was awake and in good enough shape to talk to her they would probably want a little private family time anyway.
I was so focused on taking care of Sparkler that I missed the hushed whispers from the other family in the room—though in fairness, part of that was probably due to the sound-dampening spells that kick up when the privacy screen is in place. Even if there hadn't been any magic involved, I had more important things occupying my attention than the intimate conversations of total strangers. Regardless, I didn't notice the other pony in the room until she was practically standing beside us.
“Excuse me.” I looked up, and saw Princess Celestia herself standing in the doorway. On any other day I probably would’ve bolted to my hooves and promptly bowed to her, but right now I was just too burned out to worry about protocol. From the fact that nopony got on my case over it, I’m pretty sure they all understood.
Sparkler’s ears perked up, and she turned to the Princess, a quiet, hopeful plea in her eyes. “Are—are you here to heal Uncle Cirrus?”
The Princess gave a barely perceptible flinch and reluctantly shook her head. “I am sorry, Sparkler, but the doctors have already done everything that can be done for him.” I took a close look at the Princess, and noticed her mane seemed a bit less colorful and flowing than it usually did, her eyes were slightly sunken, and there was still a small scorch mark on the tip of her horn. I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised she looked a little haggard, if she’d lost a fight to Chrysalis.
Sparker let out a soft snort, and her gaze dropped down to floor. She let out a quiet, resentful murmur. “What good are you, then?”
Celestia apparently chose to diplomatically pretend she hadn’t heard Sparkler’s last comment. If I had to guess, I’d say the Princess was pretty close to tapped out, as far as alicorns go. Whatever she had left after the fight with Chrysalis had probably been spent on saving ponies who were in worse shape than Cirrus. That wouldn’t be much comfort to Sparkler, though. Knowing a dozen ponies she’d never met before had their lives saved by the Princess’ healing wouldn’t make her uncle any less crippled, and that was all she cared about right now.
It wasn’t hard to guess why Celestia was walking around the Recovery Ward. I knew that visiting the soldiers who’d gotten hurt under my command was the proper thing to do, and Princess Celestia was a lot better and more experienced at the whole leadership thing.
The Princess took a deep breath, and then stepped up to Cirrus and cast a spell. The glow around her horn looked a lot weaker, and flickered a bit while she was casting: that was usually a sign that the spellcaster was running on empty. After a few seconds she stopped her casting, and there was an undercurrent of profound weariness to her voice as she spoke. “I have done what I can to ease his pain.”
Sparkler frowned at her for a bit longer, then her expression softened slightly and she grunted out, “Thanks. Sorry about—”
Princess Celestia waved the apology away before she could even get started. “It’s quite understandable. It has been a long, difficult day for all of us.”
Sparkler shuffled uncomfortably, shooting an awkward look up at the Princess. “Um, say, d’you think there’s any way you could get word to my mom that I’m okay?” Sparkler’s eyes dropped the floor, and she continued in a nervous mumble “S’just, I don’t want her freaking when she finds out Canterlot got hit.”
Celestia nodded. “I’m sure I can arrange something.” She then turned to me. “I hate to impose any further than I already have, but I need to borrow you for a few minutes, Cloud Kicker.”
Sparkler deflated, her ears going flat against her head. “Oh. Yeah. Alright then. I’ll just stay here, I guess. S’not like I got anywhere else to be.”
I instinctively tightened my grip around Sparkler. I’m normally not the type of pony who would refuse a royal order, but I really didn’t like the idea of leaving Sparkler alone right now. Thankfully, the Princess stepped in to smooth any ruffled feathers. “It will only be for a short while, and we’ll just be on the other side of the room, under a privacy spell.”
I reluctantly removed myself from Sparkler’s grip. I still didn’t like the idea, but it’s not like I would be leaving her completely alone, and the Princess probably had a good reason for wanting to talk to me. I stepped over to an isolated corner of the room, and a second later I felt a spell snap into place. Celestia might be weak and tired by her standards, but an exhausted alicorn’s still probably a step above most rested unicorns.
Princess Celestia turned to me, and her shoulders slumped down, while her mane grew even more frayed than it already was. She looked a lot less regal and princess-like than she’d been a minute ago. I guess she’d been trying to keep up a good front for the troops, but now that she had a privacy spell safely in place she could finally allow herself to show a bit of how tired she was. She sat down, and seemed to need a couple seconds to gather herself before she could actually speak. “I’ve been informed that you attempted to recover Shadow’s Armor.”
“Yeah.” I self-consciously scuffed a hoof along the floor, suddenly feeling like a filly who’d been caught with her hoof in the cookie jar. “You can probably tell that it didn’t exactly work out.”
Celestia placed a hoof on my shoulder. “Don’t judge yourself too harshly for that, Cloud Kicker. The Armor’s standards are extremely high; Shadow was very emphatic in her insistence that she would rather see it go unused than risk it falling into the wrong hooves.”
I guess I could understand that. If I had a magical artifact with my name and legacy attached to it, I’d probably want to make sure it didn’t wind up in some evil overlord’s collection too. Still... “We would’ve been in a tight spot if Cadance and Shining Armor hadn’t pulled off their love shield of doom. Seems like a bad design to have your emergency super-armor be so picky that almost nopony can use it. And while we’re on the subject, what’s up with the armor killing the ponies who wear it anyway? Isn’t that the opposite of what armor is supposed to do?”
The Princess smiled and let out a soft chuckle. “You always were an inquisitive one, Cloud Kicker. Very well, I shall answer your second question first, since it is the simpler one. The Armor itself does not kill anypony. However, fighting entities with powers and abilities far beyond those of ordinary mares and stallions is a very hazardous business. The Armor might have given you strength to match Chrysalis, but she still has a vast intellect, millennia of experience, and an army of drones.”
“Huh. So there is no curse. Figured.” The armor being cursed made for a nice legend, but I did kind of figure that it was only a legend. An emergency superweapon with a killer curse on it wouldn’t be much good, and you’d think Celestia or somepony would’ve just gotten rid of the curse if there was one.
Granted, it was a lot easier to be rational about how the curse was probably just an old mare’s tale when I wasn’t thinking about putting the Armor on. Superstition always gets a lot more convincing when you’re looking it in the face.
“As for your other question,” Celestia continued. “as I said, the consequences of the armor falling into the wrong hooves could be most severe. The Elements of Harmony require that their users hold their virtues near to their hearts. Equestria could have fallen to eternal darkness if Twilight and her friends had not succeeded in demonstrating why they were worthy of wielding the Elements. Even though it is a less powerful artifact, Shadow’s Armor must be similarly protected. I would not see the armor I forged for a pony who was very dear to me used by one who would profane her legacy and use its power for foul ends.”
Call me a dirty-minded mare if you will, but my mind latched onto her particular choice of words. Probably because discussing that was a lot more fun than getting into a long debate over how much security was too much. Really, that’s just going to boil down to politics and personal opinion anyway. Political debates are boring, especially compared to what I was thinking of now. A sly grin snuck onto my face. “So ... Shadow was ‘very dear’ to you, was she?” I winked at the Princess.
“She was,” Celestia confirmed. “As are all of my little ponies.”
“Nope, no dodging the question.” Maybe all the stress had just made my mind finally snap, but I was determined to get a straight answer. “Shadow wouldn’t tell me while I was trying to get the armor, but you can. Come on, I promise I won’t tell anypony...”
The supreme ruler of Equestria quirked a single eyebrow at me. “You really are determined to get an answer, aren’t you?”
“Yup,” I confirmed. “Not gonna drop this thing until I get a straight answer.”
“Well then...” Princess Celestia paused, and a teasing smirk worked its way onto her face. I felt an understandable bit of trepidation as she readied her response. “I do distinctly recall hearing that you once attempted to seduce my sister. You do realize that if you were, in fact, my descendant, then any acts you performed with Luna would be—”
“Gah! I get the idea, you can stop talking now!” I groaned and pounded a hoof on my forehead in a vain attempt to get rid of that particular line of thought. I hadn’t ever considered things from that perspective before, but ... yeah. Ew. Sure, one could point out that the thirty or so generations between me and maybe-Celestia was far more than enough time for that there wasn’t any perceivable genetic tie between me and Luna, but it was still ... ew.
It didn’t help that Celestia had a hoof over her mouth, and very quietly snickering at me. That evil, evil mare.
“Okay. Fine. I’ll drop it.” I groaned and gave a couple shakes of my head to try and bury that line of thought into one of the deep, dark places of brain I never visited. “You win.”
“I usually do,” Princess Celestia answered lightly. Thankfully, she decided to spare me any further suffering by changing the subject. “Now, there was one other matter I wanted to discuss with you. I understand that my sister has offered you the chance to return to the Guard. In light of your actions today, I would like to second that offer. I won’t pretend that it will be easy, and you will certainly have to atone for your past mistakes, but the option is present if you wish to pursue it.”
Yesterday, that offer might have been tempting. A lot had happened in the last day or so. “Thank you, Princess, but I think I’m fine with being a civilian.”
“Very well then.” She paused in thought for a moment, then declared. “I suppose the least I can do is put an end to your current awkward status within the Guard.” She concentrated for a moment, and a single scroll appeared in mid-air, then floated into my hooves. I opened it up, and read the first couple lines.
Discharge papers. Better than that, it was a full honorable discharge. Nopony would ever say I hadn’t done my duty for clan and country again. It was everything I could’ve hoped for. The whole situation was perfect.
Too perfect.
Yeah, getting out of the Guard with an honorable discharge would’ve been nice, but that’s the kind of thing a pony ought to earn by actually spending their years in the Guard. Getting out of the Guard with a certificate saying I’d done my duty wouldn’t count for much, because a piece of paper wouldn’t change the fact that I’d run out on the Guard. Hay, if not for Dad pulling strings to shield me, I would’ve classified as a deserter. Sure, I’d stepped up and done my duty today, but you can’t spend one day fighting and then claim you were a good soldier. You get an honorable discharge for years of service.
“Thanks again, Princess, but no thanks.” I hoofed the papers back over to her. “I’ve been getting into a whole lot of trouble lately because I’ve been running away from my problems and responsibilities. I think it’s about time I started facing them. It just seems like walking away from the Guard with an honorable discharge wouldn’t be very ... honorable.”
Celestia frowned down at me. “Surely you don’t want to be court-martialed for desertion?”
I winced at that. I might be trying to do the right thing, but getting put on trial was a bit of an extreme step to take. Still, trying to do the honorable thing doesn’t really count for much if you’re gonna half-flank it. “Do you think that’s necessary?”
The Princess slowly shook her head. “I think, if you will agree, I can save us both a good deal of time and trouble by ruling on the matter personally.” I nodded, then waited for her verdict.
Since she was going by the military code, there was really only one way she could rule. My next set of discharge papers looked almost exactly the same, except that now every mention of honorable discharge had ‘dis’ in front of it. That hurt, but at the same time ... well, I’d earned it.
To my surprise, after handing down the ruling Princess Celestia kept talking. It seemed that she had one last trick to pull on me. “While abandoning your responsibilities to the Guard was a severe error, you’ve been a good citizen of Equestria since, and I cannot ignore the importance of your actions earlier today. Although your dishonorable discharge currently stands on record, I would be willing to offer a royal pardon if certain conditions were met.”
My ears perked up at that. “What kind of conditions?” A pardon would at least wipe out the black spot on my record from the dishonorable discharge. Being kicked out of the military for bad behavior doesn’t look good to anypony.
Celestia tapped a hoof against her chin a few times. “Well, the normal rules for West Hoof are that you serve in the Guard instead of paying for your education. Since you never served...”
“Oh.” I think my bank account just cried out in agony. Blossom was always grumbling about paying off her student loans, and I had a feeling the technical college she’d gone to was a lot less expensive than West Hoof. “Um ... got a ballpark figure for how many bits that’ll be?”
Celestia named a number. I tried not to faint. All those bits I’d told Bon Bon I had saved up were gone. So much for decompressing from all this crazy horseapples by taking a long, debaucherous vacation in Las Pegasus. “Do I have to pay all of that back at once?”
“I’m sure we can work out the details of a reasonable repayment plan later,” Princess Celestia assured me. “As for the bits themselves, I know a number of charities that could put them to good use.”
“Super.” Yeah, my bits would do a lot more good going to some charity, but a tiny, greedy portion of my mind felt that the only charity I should be spending bits on was seeing if I could find that one mare I’d met on my last trip to Las Pegasus who liked to cover herself in whipped cream and then let me lick it off. At least, I’m pretty sure that her name was Charity. Or something like that. Or was it Vanilla Sky who did the whipped cream thing? It was hard to be sure, I’d been a bit drunk at the time. What mattered was that I could’ve spent those bits on a week of living in luxury and inventing enough new ways to bang to put out my own version of the Kamare Sutra.
Apparently, being responsible includes making some unpleasant sacrifices. It wasn’t even all that bad, really. In a way, it felt oddly uplifting to get smacked with a huge fine for past misconduct. At least I wouldn’t have that issue hanging over my head anymore. No more unresolved guilt over my mistake in running out on the Guard, and everything Dad had to go through to shield me from the consequences of that. I owed him a lot for that.
My ears twitched when Princess Celestia cleared her throat. “Oh, yes, one other thing, Cloud Kicker. You’re acquainted with my student Twilight, yes? Talk to her about writing a friendship report for me about everything you’ve learned from this experience.”
“A friendship report?” I let out a skeptical cough. “Seriously?”
Princess Celestia delicately cleared her throat. “So, about the interest rate on your repayment plan...”
The Princess fights dirty.
I gave the only answer I could: “When the report’s done, do you want me to deliver it directly to you or should I just give it to Twilight?”
“Either will do.” Celestia paused, then offered me a gentle smile. “Though I always do appreciate it when family visits.” She allowed just long enough for the implications of that to sink in before adding, “I consider all of my little ponies a part of my family.”
“Okay, now I know you’re just messing with me,” I grumbled. Seriously, is there something about being an alicorn that requires you to constantly make cryptic, open to interpretation statements?
“Perhaps a little,” Celestia admitted with a soft chuckle.
I guess that was just more proof that, for all her stoicism, Shadow must have had a good sense of humor. No way she could’ve hooked up with Celestia if she was as dour and stoic as some ponies claim.
That particular line of thought came to an abrupt end as Celestia set a single hoof on my shoulder. “Cloud, regardless of what your discharge papers say or what happened when you tried to claim Shadow’s Armor, I think you should know that I am very proud of you. I think that if they were still here, Shadow and your mother would be too.” Then she did something I really didn’t expect, and pulled me into a hug. I guess privacy spells let her get away with being a bit less formal than she normally is. “I am proud of you, Cloud Kicker—the mare you are, the lives you saved, and so, so much more.”
At first I was frozen in surprise at being hugged by the ruler of Equestria, but it didn’t take long for my brain to adjust, and soon I was returning it. I have to admit, I’d needed a bit of a pick-me-up after getting those discharge papers. Unfortunately, I couldn’t hold out forever. “So ... when you say you’re proud of me, do you mean proud like a monarch is of her subjects, or more like a thirty generations removed grandmother?”
She let out a snort of laughter. I guess even Princess Celestia herself couldn’t resist the charm of bad jokes and unshakable persistence. “Oh, Cloud Kicker...”